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ITT we talk about faggots at our gym/workout cringes >Be 3

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ITT we talk about faggots at our gym/workout cringes
>Be 3 days ago
>Some 150 pound skeleton walks in
>I give him a long, cold stare as he walks into the machine area.
>under 70lbs at every machine
>He's embarrassed as fuck
>Kid obviously never worked out a day in his life
>Goes to benchpress
>This should be good.jpg
>Can hardly bench the bar
>mfw I was benching 200 when I was 17
>I let out audible laugh
>he's trying so hard, his face is all scrunched up
>It falls on his neck and he struggles with all his strength to get it up off of his neck.
>Can't even lift it to literally save his life
>Someone helps him get it off
>tries curling 25 pound dumbbells.
>can barely do it, horrible form
>Treadmills for 15 minutes
>I hate when people think running is a good workout
>I see him in the locker room trying to look tired
>tsk at him and shake my head
>He goes red as fuck, like tomato red
>Hasn't come back since
He went back where hungry skeletons belong; their room trying to do pushups.
>>
>>27898851
epic troll
>>
>>27898851
this is some reverse psychology shit to get skellies pumped isnt it
>>
fucking skellies. when will they learn
>>
>>27898882
No, I genuinely hate skeletons and lardasses that try to work out. It's like, no, you had your chance to start working out and doing sports at 15, but you chose not to. Actions have consequences.
>>
>>27898851
>fat as fatass
>squats and deadlifts a ton, bench is weak as fuck
>always wears his old highschool football shirt and the same shorts
>looks into space like a complete serial killer inbetween sets

>it's me
>>
>>27898851

Jej ebin master trole 2014
>>
What you don't see is him going home and banging his hot girlfriend
>>
>>27898851

I'm a skeleton and I had a good laugh at this. I'm starting to work out/get in shape and I'm not even thinking about going into a gym until I'm at least decent looking. Gyms are just places to show off/look alpha and maybe try to score some pussy.
>>
>>27898922
>>27898851
>b8ing this hard
>Actually discouraging people from trying to make it
Got a good kek out of me m8.
>>
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>>27898851

>be OP
>write this
>start laughing
>cum directly into own mouth, face, and possibly anus over it's hilarity
>wrack my body with hearty guffaws
>anally orgasm and squirt out the gallons of cum 7 black guys pumped into my at the gym an hour ago
>take cum soaked underwear off
>fuck my own face into underwear, dragon dildo sticking out of ass
>suddenly dad comes in
>he's on a prostate med that causes retrograde ejaculation
>"you fucking peice of shit, you better be ready"
>he orgasms but doesn't cum, instead starts to piss on me
>golden yellow mixed with opaque white shower my own sticky semen off my face
>he mushroom slaps me into oblivion
>i start shitting uncontrollably onto my brand new $300 chenille fabric rug with short length fibres
>mfw
>
>>
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>>27898988
>>
>>27898851
b/c you were benching 200 out of the womb right
>>
>>27898851
WHAT A BETA

and i'm talking about the OP

this is now a Certified Beta Thread

Post here to get your BETA BADGE
>>
>>27898988

>Reading this whilst fingering my own bumbum
>tfw this incredibly hot OP fanfic takes me to cumcum station
>>
>>27898922
this is top tier b8
>playing on the insecurities of late starters
>>
>>27898980
>trying
lel
>>27899041
Butthurt skeleton detected. How's it feel to look and be absolutely disgusting?

>>27898988
Best fanfic I ever read
>>
>>27898922
I made the mistake of playing soccer and running track
>>
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>>27898851
>>27898988
and many a merry kek was had by all
and to all a good night
>>
>>27898988

I like how incredibly detailed this is. It's like you can actually see the mix of anal leakage and semen sliding over the glass dragon dildo as OP's face slides around his cum soaked underwear. It's like, you can actually believe this probably happened, and in all likelihood, actually did.
>>
>>27899122
You're just mad cause you're a skeleton. You're probably a creep who stares at girls on subways too.
>>
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>>27898988

>see that image
>"Wow, nice, I loved HxH"
>pop into /a/ to check shit out
>first thread
>"Could you fall in love with a giant talking penis if it had a cute voice?"
>mfw
>>
>>27899180
>OP still trying
Come on bro.
>>
>>27899180

>he probably doesn't even have a $300 chenille fabric rug with short length fibres
>>
>>27899198
What, you encourage dweebs to come into your fucking gym and make the place look bad and embarrass themselves?
>>
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>>27899180
>damage control
>Damage control
>Damage Control
>DAMAGE CONTROL

>pic extremely related
>>
>in gym two days ago
>tfw DYEL skeletons walk in
>they both clearly think they're hot shit
>DYEL as fuck
>go on the bench
>they are doing like 5 sets of 1-3 reps of bench with weight they clearly have no business pushing
>1-3 rep
>DYELs
>150lbs max
>one kid loads up 2plates plus a 10 and a 5
>thisgonbegood.jpg
>literally just stare at them
>kid takes it off the bar
>bar drops down halfway and he pushes back
>the worst form I have ever seen
>elbows flared, back arching, feet moving for traction, face scrunched
>kid gets it back up with help from spotter
>sits up like he nailed it
>holding his shoulder lol

seriously some shit straight out of a dom mazzetti video. kid is not in the 2pl8 club, and I honestly wanted to say something

It is worth noting that I had just seen these kids walk into the gym. this was the first thing they did. no warm up sets, no set of more than 3 reps first. either this is some powerlifting shit im completely misinformed on, or these kids are morons. And if these DYELs (real dyels not the /fit/ version) were "powerlifters" than that meme is true too
>>
>>27898988

top kek

mein sides
>>
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>>27899226

>thinking just because average people don't look like this, they have no right to try.

Fucking assholes like you piss me off, bruh.
>>
>>27899241
Another hungry skeleton appears
>>
OP you have a fucking problem honestly if I was there I would beat the living fuck out of you for being a douchebag. If this isn't b8 you need someone stronger than you to kick your ass.
>>
>>27899267
>getting b8ed
anon
>>
>>27899260

Nothing wrong with that, they are literal faggots. No point, though, in trying to mock some skeleton who is trying hard and laughing at him. If they gonna fag the place up, then yeah, open season, but whatever. Just my opinion, you can feel free to agree or disagree with it. That is what makes being anonymous, and 4chan, so great in that any opinion can be said. It makes for a more agreeable, and pleasant user experience for all.
>>
>>27899279

did you really just reply that to this guy who posted fucking Yoshi with a 6 pack?
>>
>>27899299
haha
>>
>>27899299

Classic reverse bait baiting. You got got baited, you nerd.
>>
>>27899260
>not arching your back during bench press
>>
>>27898977
>Gyms are just places to show off/look alpha and maybe try to score some pussy.

THIS IS WHAT SKELETONS ACTUALLY BELIEVE
>>
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>>27899267

>like my post if you think you don't have to look like this to be able to go to the gym, or be beautiful!
>>
>>27899260
Lmfao, at least they could lift more than the bar
>>27899267
Tf is up with yoshi as your example? I've been doing sports and calisthenics since I was 8, started lifting at 15, started MMA at 18. People had their chance and you know what? They blew it playing video games, or watching tv, or watching fucking paint dry.

>>27899291
There is so much wrong with it.
>>27899332
Lmao
>>
>>27899260
.....are warm up sets the norm
>>
>>27899330

I'm talking ass almost completely off the bench arch. And he didn't start with it, clearly realized he was way in over his head and said fuck form. not that his form was good to begin with

It is also notable that they thought this was a good progression

155lbs (3 reps)
175lbs (3rep)
255lbs (1rep)

>>27899291

is this pasta?
>>
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>>27899359

>He thinks you have to look like this just to be able to use the gym

What a fucking loser fag.
>>
skeletons are just women with penises.
I was benching 115 in 8th grade FFS
>>
>>27899373

It's original, actually, whole grain pasta with lots of complex carbs, and is completely /fit/ approved no matter what diet, aside from Keto, you are on. I have had it specially formulated for this board, thank you for interacting with me in a positive way this morning! Make sure to pass it along!
>>
>>27899389
Exactly. They had their chance and they blew it. You can literally lift for free in middleschool/highschool
>>
>>27899449

I honesty feel like if you don't do some kind of physical activity in your teens you are never gonna make it. You can stop and start again after and still make it. But I feel like everyone including myself who either lifted or played sports in high school had their bodies adjust during their growth to being athletic. This is complete broscience, and there are always exceptions, but aside from using gear I've never really heard of anyone being inactive until their mid20s and then actually make it
>>
>>27899360
I like to do a few reps with the bar before I load it up with some plates, but that's just me.
>>
I don't mind weak people in my gym but I just wish they didn't use my equipment.

It's like I should be able to get first pick and you have to wait for ME to finish my workout before you can begin
>>
>>27899490
17 years old is the cut off. If you're still fat/skinny by 17, it's over. You will never look good. Everyone will be able to tell what a beta you are just from your skinny wrists.
>>
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>>27899519
strong autism
>>
>>27899519
this. so much fucking this.
>>
>>27899519
>I wish that *I* could rightfully disregard others because I'M stronger than them and ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME

You should kill yourself
>>
>>27899533
>>27899588

skeletons detected
>>
>>27899525
my god

im fat and i have skinny wrists why didnt i lift weights for free gainz in school fuck my life its all over
>>
>>27899588
Just shut up. Some pathetic little dweeb that only comes in 1 day of the week and has pathetic lifts isn't the priority.
>>
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ITT: faggotry that makes the rest of /fit/ look pure hetero.
>>
>last week
>squat day
>get prepared and go to the gym
>some guy is in my squat rack
>has the gall to squat 60kg
>I walk over, drop my bag next to him and hold my hand up and say "5 minutes" and walk away
>come back 5 minutes later and he's gone

Felt good man
>>
>>27899615
Basically. No girl wants some guy that looks like a pasty skeleton/butterball. They want tall, strong, ripped dudes.
>>
>>27899624
Just because someone isnt shredded doesnt mean they dont come in most days a week. You have no more "right" to equipment than him you insecure beta.
>>
>>27899681

He who pees on it first, marks it as its own. I don't make the rules.
>>
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>>27899650
>Things that didnt happen.
>This whole thread
>>
>>27899696

I dunno, I can believe

>>27898988
>>
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>>27899270
>s-s-s-s--skelly ap-p-pears
>>
>>27899681
He won't even make it. Shut up, when I go to the gym I don't give a FUCK about whoever else, when I go in I am the priority. I will stare someone down if they're in my spot, I will stand next to them and just be awkward as fuck, or tell them to speed it up or to just leave if they're some little fucking shripm like you.
>>
>>27899702
>>27899710
More skeletons
>>
>>27899733
fite me irl m8
>>
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>some guy on the lat pulldown machine
>can tell he's new, he doesn't know what he's just done
>you know the type, loose fitting white shirt, knee length shorts, socks and messy hair
>walk over
>tap him on the shoulder
>gesture with my finger for him to get up
>he stands up
>"wh-what?"
>"I'll say this only once kid, this machine here is mine, when I enter the gym, it ceases to be equipment, it becomes MY equipment
>grab one end of the pulldown bar
>ram it forward so that the other end smashes into his forehead
>he crumbles like a sack of shit onto the floor
>janitor walks past
>I lean over and say "Take out the trash"
>>
>>27899624
I have a home gym and I lift three times a week. Kill yourself you angsty beta faggot
>>
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>>27899718
Sure thing m8
>>
>>27899743
im rock hard
>>
>>27899750
>Jesus Christ Marie
>>
>>27899743

You should have said: "nothing personal kiddo"
>>
>be me
>be 6'2, 195ish lbs
>be 7% bf
>see hungry skeleton try to bench bar, fail miserably
>laugh at him
>point him out in the locker room
>post about it on fit
>mfw i'm actually fat, no gf, and posting on fit
>mfw i'm OP
>>
>>27899718
autism so potent the likes of which appears only once in a generation
>>
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jesus christ theyre all over the place
>>
>>27899785
So many skeletons. 2spooky4me
>>27899788
>>
>go to gym
>some weak beta faggot is squatting 5 plates for reps
>tickle his crotch to get his attention
>"listen here, small fry, when I walk into the gym, the squat rack is mine."
>take a 45lb plate
>smash his fucking beta head in
>he falls on the floor
>I rip off his arm and use it to pleasure my prostate on the spot
>everyone gathers to witness my anal masturbation
>"THE FUCK ARE YOU ALL LOOKING AT?"
>everyone scatters
>I eventually jizz and coat the entire gym wall with my thick seed
>every woman within a 20 mile radius orgasms uncontrollably

fucking gym betas i swear
>>
Jesus Christ, OP getting BTFO with all these greentext stories.

>Be OP
>Read this post
>"Uh... L....L-Le hungry skeleton appears"
>Ejaculates thick ropey streams of semen all over face
>>
>>27899836
Yeah well you're a skeleton too.
>>
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>>27898922
Yeah. I never ynderstood why people liked losers like Zyzz. Zyzz should have just killed himself when he was 15 yo skelly.
>>
uni gym types
frat bro
>30 min workout/dick around with bros
>bench press with knees up
>bicep curls
>ab workouts
>3 days a week, protein right after workout

late thirties instructor, but thinks hes young
>fun run t-shirt
>heart rate monitor or whatever it is
>95lb squats
>1 plate bench
>leg extensions
>dumbbell OHP
>60 run

semi serious lifter
>bench press 185, mediocre form
>squats, no form
>deadlifts sometimes
>standing bicep curls
>seated bicep curls/skull crushers, hoards all the dumbbells

serious lifters
>lift normally,mind form, only like 10 of them

powerlifters
>squatting 5 plate full ROM
>staff tells them not to, bar might break
>deadlifting 6 plate
>squatting 5 plate full ROM
>staff tells them not to, bar might break
>benching 3 plate for reps
>weighted bar dips with 4 plates
>perverted smirk on their face cause they know how it looks
>only 2 of them so they look extra gay doing it
>>
>>27899807

>walk into gym
>just started running test and tren
>cutting hard
>angry as fuck all the time
>walk into locker room
>I use the same corner locker every time
>some 5'10" 120lb faggot is using my locker
>politely inform him that that's my locker
>he goes on about how he pays for membership too or whatever
>say im not trying to be a dick but I need that corner to pin so I insist (I didn't say I pin)
>he calls me an asshole and takes out a lock
>I am furious at this point
>notice nobody else is in the locker room
>grab him and punch him in the stomach
>hit him a few more times in the ribs
>he on the floor seated up breathing heavy
>/fit/ has conditioned me to make this an act of dominance
>take out my well hydrated flaccid cock and smack him in the face with it like 4 times while calling him a faggot
>immediately regret it
>tell him to just get out of here
>hide all my stuff cause im sure the cops are coming
>they don't

I'm not gay and later I felt really bad about it. I've really been freaking out since I got on the gear though and he didn't seem like a bad kid, and I probably would have done the same in his position. Kid looked like he was about to cry. I honestly want to apologize and take him under my wing but I doubt ill ever see him again. Plus he's a skeleton and would probably make no gains and think I was grooming him to be a twink fuckboi. Sorry im doing lines of coke and cant stop typing
>>
>>27899903

>steroids

sure they can make it if they go that route, but most people don't
>>
>>27899930

fuckthats hot...
>>
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>go to use bench
>two absolute dyel punks on their already
>don't want to get confrontational on today of all days (just finished current creatine cycle)
>walk over to the plate rack and grab all the 2.5kg plates
>get about 20m away from them
>take aim with the plate and launch it like a discus
>first shot is a disaster and misses
>got their attention, they get up confused
>launch another warning shot
>they start to run out
>frisbee the last plate I have and it hits one of the guys on the cranium, busting his eye and he collapses on the ground
>walk over slowly and haunch down
>"You will be my warning to others"
>grab him by the scruff of his neck like a kitten and walk him over to the power cage
>put a bar on the top pegs and wrap his arms around the bar
>put clips on his wrists to keep them on the bar
>mfw I crucified him
>"This is my design"

ain't had an incident since
>>
>>27899656
Then explain all the no gf threads or pick up threads of fit dudes LOL keep trying kiddo
>>
>tfw it's my fetish/dream/desire to get bullied like this
>but you would also approach me in the locker room and yell at me and slap me around
>and maybe make me suck your cock
>>
>>27899359
>my life story is everyone else's life story, don't you know that
>>
>>27898977
this thread is full of gr8 b8
>>
>>27899975

You might enjoy this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fpfUKXDSrPE
>>
>>27898988
Jesus, I'm trying to fucking eat.
>>
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>be OP
>"Whatever, skeleton nerds won't ever get a hot GF like me"
>goes home
>takes out handy trap toy
>>
>>27899964

>"This is my design"

FUCKING TOP KEK
U
C
K
I
N
G

T
O
P

K
E
K
>>
>>27898988

I kek pot'd

Dat unnecessary rug details. But damn, if it doesn't paint an accurate picture
>>
>Walk into the gym
>My 6'8 250lbs physique exuding alpha vibes throughout the building
>Most people know by now not to fuck with me, everyone tries to catch glimpse when they think i wont see them in the hopes their eyeballs will absorb some of my gainz
>See some borderline skinnyfat skeleton faggot on MY bench
>Menacingly walk up to him
>Honestly has the fucking nerve to try and tell me that he's not done yet
>Backhand the spit out of his mouth like he's a fucking bitch before he can even finish
>Force him to his knees with ease after asserting my dominance over him like that
>Shove my giant 10'' flaccid cock in his mouth and tell him to start sucking
>Get fully erect and begin gagging him like the DYEL faggot he is
>Cum down his throat and all over his face
>Grab him by his faggy cut off tank, pull him up and tell hes done for the day
>Shove him toward the locker room
>Other aesthetic, swole gymbros come over and congratulate me on showing that skeleton faggot who's boss
>Begin my work out, hit new PRs with my testosterone raging from a freshly drained nutsack.
>>
>>27899943
Still, Jeff is the rightful king of fit. He's been lifting from childhood like a man.
>>
>>27898851
i hope you get super aids
>>
>>27899930
*puffs inhaler*
Jesus dude you just triggered my skeleton.
>>
>>27900063
jeff pls go
>>
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>>27900058
goddamn this shit is giving me a boner man stop it for real
>>
>be vacationing in manila
>got nothing to do one day since its fcking hot
>decided to hit a local gym
>4 people there
>3 is waiting for their turns to use the benchpress
>"but its wednesday"
>1 is doing a bicep curl
>all 4-5 is under 5'5
>I was 5'11 (s-sorry /fit/)
>all other equipments are free
>mfw squatrack
>YEAH BOI SQUATS
>mfw the pins are below my nipples
>mfw you cant almost take the pin off because of corrosion
>I load lmaojstoneplaetesrryfit squats (1 week in ss faggots)
>see curl bro mirin
>I'M A GOD AMONGST THOUSANDS KNEEL BEFORE ME
>continue my routine
>suddenly as I put the weight down, I notice all 4 is staring at me
>curl bro then comes up to me and says "Sir, you're doing it wrong" as the midget tries its best to speak my language, probably thought I was from great britbong
>I say its cool its in my routine
>curl bro says "but sir you might hurt your back, you shouldnt be using momentum to put the weight up"
>this nigger is calling the kettle black
>I dont look at him and just say that its ok its in my routine
>curl bro walks away
>5 seconds later, Curl bro is back with the biggest bench dude
>wasnt big, hes the type that wears a wife beater in gym and is all fat and walks around with an imaginary lats, lets call him daisy
>as I'm doing my reps (got 2 more) daisy taps me in the shoulder and asks me to remove my earphones
>daisy says "sir thats not how you do deadlifts, you will hurt your back, the momentum of gravity will move fast and snap! there goes your back"
>literally wat
>curl bro then comes with a barbell
>daisy sets barbell up beside me
>"look sir, this is how you do deadlifts, there is no need to use momentum to get the weight up, you will hurt yourself, watch me"
>this nigga
>sets up 70lb deadlifts, proceed to spend 5 seconds adjusting his butt, uses that thing you wrap around the bar from your wrist to grip the barbell
>says 1...2.. UUUUUUURGGGHHHH
>does .5 ROM
>literally cringed
>Daisy high fives curl bro
>says to me "see? no go do it"
>>
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>>27900058

that slight penis twitch
>>
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>mfw see someone using my upright row bar without written permission obtained by an application form sent to my mum to be approved by me
>>
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>>27898851

>He went back where hungry skeletons belong; their room trying to do pushups.

Pic related, obvs!!!! These fags on /fit/ are not swole like us OP, lmao!!! :)
>>
>>27899650
fuck you. try that shit with me and see what happens. when you come back ill be doing 10 lb dumbell curls in the squatrack and if you say even one fucking word ill shove them up your ass.
>>
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>>27900100
>to mock this midget scum, I proceed to 'deadlift' the 40kg barbell that I was using
>fuck yes rippetits form
>decide to just do it for these people to leave me alone
>Daisy grins at curl bro like a fucking mormon who looks like he showed someone the true meaning of salvation
>Daisy shakes hit head as he goes back to benchpressing
>mfw this is my face for the next 3 hours
>curl bro fucks off and I continue doing my powercleans
>>
>>27900121
>>27900121
this made me laugh
>>
>>27900100
>Getting plunked by midget gooks
You sound like a faggot supreme
>>
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>>27900121
>>
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>32 AD
>Some long haired beta faggot trying to reclaim the gym for the skellies
>"The weak will inherit the earth"
>Me and my boys approach him during his squats
>mfw bodyweight squats in the squat rack
>LITERALLY crucify him on 2 barbells
>Kick all the skellies out
>Whisper to that beta
>"This is my temple motherfucker"
>>
I actually agree with OP. Say what you like but I can tell instantly whether someone is gonna make it or not. It's in the eyes. 90% of the skellies I've seen passing through my gym have this intrinsic weakness burnt into their eyes. They have already been defeated by the world and when they scuttle into gym the only thing awaiting them is defeat by the iron. It's sad to watch and such weakness doesn't belong in a place of strength and discipline. These people should stay the fuck out of the gym.
>>
>>27900153
Exactly. They will never make it and never get the eye from girls
>>
>>27900153
get off your high horse, none of us will ever truly make it and have our place in olympia next to the gods, but that is the point, we will never make it, but if you tell someone that He cant fucking make it, that person will do his best to make and will work his ass off and bleed until he reaches the point where he's short of making and see that the gods are still up there but he looks back and see he is higher than everybody else, he earned his spot below the gods feet
>>
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>>27900058

>be OP
>read this
>mfw

fuck thats hot... wish it happened to me... by a REAL man, not a skeleton, btw...
>>
>>27900152

It's the meek will inherit the earth you mong.
>>
>>27900152
It's actually "The meek will inherit the earth", but I'm sure you already knew that.
>>
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>>27900188
funny. Real op here, begone skeleton
>>
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>>27900197
>the city of you
>>
>>27900185
thats the most faggot and skelly thing ive ever read
>>
>>27900185
Case in point.
>>
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>>27899930
kek
>>
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>Be OP
>Tell Skellington to fuck off
>He whimpers away, scurries under a hole
>smugface.jpg
>I'm squatting my PR after all that adrenaline surges through me from telling off skellies
>Suddenly, 6 skellingtons burst through the door
>Surround me with Batman-esque tools that enhance their weak girly fag arms and pin me down
>Take turns raping my asshole and mouth
>Can literally feel their cocks go Kasplurt Kasplurt as they rub my butt clitoris
>One skelly nearly rips my tonsils out with his forceful thrusts
>Takes it out of my mouth
>"Tell me you need to suck my cock or we will kill you, faggot"
>"I...I want to suck your cock"
>He smirks at me and tells me to appreciate it
>I can see a small amount of salive drip off the corner of his plump purple head
>Shoves it back in and cums hard down my throat
>He's still hard
>I realize that was just his precum, he shot more precum down my faggy mouth than most cum regularly
>He goes and cums in my ass
>They tell me to clench all the cum inside
>Make me squat my new PR in front of everybody
>mfw I squart literal gallons of fecal matter, spit, and semen all over the floor, my fluids flowing like it's high season on the Nile river
>>
>Be 7 foot tall mass monster
>Walk into gym and head to bench
>start to load up 4 plates for my warm up sets
>see a fucking disgusting DYEL skeleton on the next bench over
>only 2 plates
>HOW DARE HE even consider benching fucking baby weight near me
>Tell him is he doesn't fuck off I'm going to punish him
>Looks afraid like he doesn't even understand >what is it this guys first day in the gym
>"Dont you understand that I OWN THIS WEIGHTS AREA"
>"BOW TO ME"
>He stares at me confused and begins to pathetically mumble
>Achieving full power I scream and grasp my 405 bar one handed and slam in into his chest killing him instantly
>owner gives me a free month of membership for cleaning up the scum and mayor gives me the key to the city

Typical workout
>>
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>>27900279

goddamn if its the same fucking guy writing this homo shit you got some talent bud.

well done
>>
>>27898851

>Be me
>Walk into the gym
>See a guy giving me a stare, trying to motivate me
>Smile inside, what a nice guy
>I'm red in the cheeks because I'm thinking about how nice everyone at this gym is
>Go to benchpress
>Can't do much, I've had cancer most of my life and been on chemo, but I'm trying my hardest!
>Cancer in remission for weeks now so finally working out
>Guy across the way gives me a knowing smile and giggles a bit at me
>veryinterested.jpg
>His interest in me makes me drop the bar on my neck
>Other nice guy gets it off me
>Beginning to love this gym
>Do other routines trying to get my general fitness level up from being in bed for years
>Go to locker room
>Guy from before gives me a "Ooooh, tsk tsk" in a sexy way as he sees my only nonatrophied body part from chemo, 10 inch dick
>I go red as fuck, like tomato red
>We fuck vigorously as he suggests a good workout to get back in shape
>Thrusting deeper and deeper into his ass than I've ever before
>Let my 3 year built up cum stores flow like the dike protecting the Netherlands just broke in a huge storm
>Suddenly, bunch of guys from /fit/ walk in
>He begs me to let him post a story on /fit/ to reaffirm his masculinity
>I wink at him as I smear the last of my cum dripping off of my cock on his face
>"Anything for you, honey buns"
>We have a date next week
>Never felt better

Gonna make it /fit/, I really think so.
>>
>>27900328

Fuck eh, I literally have to run over to /gif/ and get rid of this hardon now.

>Can literally feel their cocks go Kasplurt Kasplurt as they rub my butt clitoris
>Kasplurt Kasplurt as they rub my butt clitoris

Kek'd and Cum'd
>>
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>>27898988
I dont usually but i did.
>>
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>>27899341
>that picture
captcha: school ottermade
>>
>Be OP
>Write this obviously made up story and make the faggiest thread ever on /fit/
>Derided by every single post inside
>Decide that I should suck a cock to make penance
>2 years later...
>Go back to my old gym for old times sake
>See that skellington in MY spot
>Except, he's huge now, easily can bench and squat twice what I can
>He smirks at me
>"I've been waiting for you, friend"
>He pulls down his pants to reveal a perfectly sized cock, bright pink and glowing with effervescent energy
>I don't even move, I drop to my knees
>He walks over and inserts it into my mouth in full view of everyone
>I take my time running my tongue all over the tip
>Feel the underside of his cock with my tongue, where it meets the head
>It twitches every time I do, so hard it actually moves my head up
>He reaches down, sticks a finger in my ass
>Moan into his cock
>He takes this chance to shove it even deeper down my throat
>I begin to accept that my worth in life is simply to pleasure this mans penis, a sack of skin literally worth more than my life
>But I love it
>As I'm sucking, I actually cum in my pants
>As I realize, it's bring your family to the gym day
>My entire family is here, even my sister
>She giggles, takes off my underwear, and rubs my own cum in my face
>"You're such a faggot, OP"
>My dad laughs too and says "Don't lose sight of that cock, son, you dirty faggot cocksucker"
>I go back to my duty to pleasure this mans penis
>I feel his cock expand with pleasure, he's cumming soon
>I try to back my head off when my sister shoves my head deep on his cock
>He cums so much it literally fills all the way back up to my mouth
>Leaking cum from the sides
>He takes his cock out, it twitches and throws a few more streams of cum on my face.
>I say "My jaw is a little sore"
>He smiles, and runs his hand through my hair
>"It's okay OP, You've realized your true place in life, and I'm happy for you"
>Beam up at him the happiest smile ever.
>>
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>>27899718
Youre scary, anon, why you do this?
>>
>>27900476

....

This thread started out funny, with >>27898988 and then eventually the stories got gayer and gayer until we arrived at this. I'm convinced there is a person who literally writes the most erotic fanfiction posting in this thread. Holy fuck.
>>
>>27900476
> /fit/
>>
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>>27899743
>Walk through gym door

BY THE POWER OF RAAAAAAA
>>
b8/10
>>
Cool story anon.

Are you mad at your mom because she told you to stop playing call of duty? Tell us how you really feel.
>>
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>Manlets. When will they learn?
>>
>>27900524

Nice angle of the shot anon, I can see why you took it. I'd like to worm my tongue up the side of his thighs and through those stretched shorts to fondle his balls with my lubricated tongue while he bench presses as well.
>>
>>27900476

This is actually pretty hot.
>>
>>27900524
anytime fitness balwyn
>>
>>27898922
beeing this beta

top kek mate
>>
>>27900553
/fit/izen at my gym? Better be careful next time I do good mornings
>>
>>27900639
>beta
how is this beta?
>>
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>>27899743
>you know the type, loose fitting white shirt, knee length shorts, socks and messy hair
>tfw you're describing me
>>
>>27898988

Fuck, I laughed too hard at this.
>>
>>27900700

caring about others this deeply when they're doing nothing that even vaguely involves you is full beta mode.

basically, if you're buttmad that someone even exists you might as well be an omega no matter how heavy you lift.
>>
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>be 7'6" 400 lbs of MUTANT
>shatter through the front window to my gym
>spy a 6'5" manlet doing 3pl8 power cleans in the cage
>give out a mighty MUTANT belch that was conjured up by the powerful MUTANT MASS digesting in my system
>he looks at me
>assert my dominance by OHPing him while he's still holding the bar
>throw him onto the ground after 20 reps, his puny human bones snap under the weight of his bar
>snort a line of creatine off his femur
>use my superlative strength and superior physique to fashion the bar into a set of metal wings
>fly into the sky like Icarus
>finally leaving humanity behind
>>
>Be OP again
>Secretly hungry skeletons and DYEL curbros are my fetish, act like an asshole to them because of me being so shy and insecure around them
>Walking into the locker room showers after a long work out
>Lathering up my swole, joocy physique
>A wild group of lvl 20 skeletons and curlbros appears
>They're laughing and messing around with each other as they undress and head to the shower
>Instinctively assume a submissive posture in the shower, legs get closer together and tighten up
>Get a raging hard on, my tiny 4 inch penis dwarfed by my tall stature and muscular frame
>They notice immediately and begin taunting me
>Surround me, their DYEL arrogance and cockiness making my erection even more furious
>Doesnt take much convincing from them to get me on my knees
>I am literally surrounded by cocks of various sizes and shapes, each one just as delicious as the last
>Get passed around from one cock to the next, some of them let me suck at my leisure.
>Others are really aggressive and fuck my throat and shove my head onto their throbbing cocks
>This goes on for what feels like hours until finally they stop, laughing and calling me names like faggot, slut and bitch
>One of them pushes me over onto the hard tile floor, it's cool surface on my back and butt cheeks is welcome relief for my knees
>Lifts my legs into the air and plows into me right there, no condom and only my saliva and his precum as lube
>The others wait their turn talking about whatever, hardly even aware that i'm getting my anus stretched and pounded right in front of them
>The rest take turns fucking my tight yet eager boi pussy
>Last one is slam fucking me doggy style and comments on my muscular glutes sliding onto his cock
>Lets me fuck myself onto his cock, yells out "Ass to grass!" as i'm laying into his dick, the others nearly doubled over in laughter knowing he was talking about his pubes
>Pulls out and cums all over my red and weary asshole and cheeks.
>>
>>27900836

topkek
>>
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>>27898851
>>
>>27900861
Fuck's sake /fit/. Why boner.
>>
>>27900861

fuck Fuck FUCK!

Somebody needs to screencap this entire fucking thread. Not only did I lose my sides, I also lost 5 gallons of cum.

>tfw you'll never laugh as hard as you did when you laughed at this threads greentexting
>tfw you'll never cum as much as you did when you read this threads greentexting

Feels bad man
>>
>>27899624
Please grace us by telling us how much you DL, squat and bench. Let us decide if you're worth the equipment in the gym.
>>
>>27900367
lel 9/10
>>
>>27898851
I can't tell if troll or legitly retarded douchebag.
>>
>>27900367
>>27900279
>>27899964
>>27898988

Loving. Every. Laff.
>>
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>>27899930
>>27900058
>>27900279
>>27900367
>>27900476
>>27900861
Fuck, never change /fit/. I think some of these were even from different anons.
>>
>>27898851
Are you trolling or are you really this much of an insecure pathetic nasty piece of shit?
>>
>>27898851

>be alone in my gym
>just a moment later a 60kg hungry skeleton no older than 18 years arrives
>he nods to greet me and goes to the cable machine
>he does some shit with 30kg, clearly in immense agony
>Has the shittiest poker face ever
>after a couple of minutes, he changes machines
>He goes through every machine like the place is some sort of amusement park always doing shit with 10-30kg
>I've had enough
>Ask him: "Are you sure you should be here?"
>The kid looks at me confused and asks: "Wh- What do y- you mean?"
>me: "Huh?"
>Kid: "What do y-"
>me: "HUH?!"
>I fucking smash my dumbbells on the floor and start walking towards the kid
>"I ASKED, ARE YOU SURE YOU SHOULD BE HERE?!"
>the kid pisses his pants and leaves almost crying
>everything went better than expected
>after that episode, haven't seen the kid again
>I saved the gym culture

I can imagine the kid at home, crying about his virginity while feasting on junk food. What a loser.
>>
>Be OP
>go to gym, planning to squat
>see two bodybuilders using the only powercage
>it's their leg day
>approach them demurely
>"c-can i w-work in with you two?..."
>they look at each other and snortle, then look back at me
>"sure buddy, how much do you weigh?"
>"w-one sixty five"
>one of the bodybuilders puts 165 on the right side of the barbell
>the other one pulls down my pants and boxers and starts rimming me
>he pulls his tongue out of my ass and shoves his fist in
>once my anus is stretched out, he puts me on the other side of the barbell, shoving it up my ass
>I'm hanging by my stretched out anus
>one of the guys gets under the bar and unracks it, does a squat
>pauses at the bottom for 5 seconds while the other guy throatfucks me
>finishes the rep and takes a few deep breathes
>"Only 19 more reps, then it's my friend's turn."
>>
>>27901494

ahahahhahahahhaha holy fuck
>>
>>27901494
>"sure buddy, how much do you weigh?"
>"w-one sixty five"
>one of the bodybuilders puts 165 on the right side of the barbell
>the other one pulls down my pants and boxers and starts rimming me
>he pulls his tongue out of my ass and shoves his fist in

that escalated quickly
>>
>>27898922
You don't exist
>>
>>27901494
>>once my anus is stretched out, he puts me on the other side of the barbell, shoving it up my ass


Kek
>>
>>27901429
Come on OP, stop playing hard to get. I'm sure they'd fuck you if you just talked to them first.
>>
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>>27899964
underrated post
>>
>>27901494
holy shit 10/10 pls screencap thread
>>
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>>27898851
>>
Someone legitimately cap some of this shit. Maybe I'll do it, I haven't seen a bunch of new original content on /fit/ that has made me fucking laugh so hard. Specifically:

>>27898988
>>27901494
>>27900476
>>27900367
>>27900279
>>27900058
>>27899964
>>27899743

This is shit you should NOT cap, it's boring as fuck:

>>27901429
>>
>>27900004
Almost quints...

>>27900000
>>
>>27900715
me too :/
>>
>>27901756
If i knew how i'd have done it a long time ago. Would also be nice to further prove that /fit/ does care about supporting noobies trying to succeed. Attitudes like OP's are toxic to those actually putting in the effort to make it.
>>
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>this thread
>>
I'm not here often but wow. Is this board always so shit and full of insecure faggots, ebin b8ers and trolls?
>>
>>27901494
>Be OP
>First day working out at planet fitness
>Go to the smith machine to do some bench pressing
>See incredibly hot blonde chick in skin tight shorts stretching right in front of the machine
>As I get closer I see her enormous breasts pushed close together by her low cut top...sweat glistening off of them
>I get hard immediately
>E-excuse me...are you u-using this smith machine?
>The fuck did you just say!
>The voice came from behind me..it was a man's voice
>6'5 245lb guy with 7% bodyfat looks pissed
>You just talked to my gf...get on your knees OP!
>I'm like a deer in headlights so I get down on my knees like the pathetic bitch I am.
>It dawns on me that a real man has spoken. It became so clear to me in that single instant. He was my superior, and I was at his mercy.
>Me and his GF both give him head at the same time...I deepthroated while she took the balls
>He turns me around and starts thrusting his spit covered cock deep into my tight butthole
>His GF takes off her shorts as a crowd gathers around us..cellphones recording the act
>The beautiful blonde places her butthole over my mouth
>"Put your tongue inside" - She says
>"Deeper!" - She yells
>"You better do it!" - The real man says.
>Upon hearing his alpha voice I immediately push my tongue as far in as I can
>I can feel the base of my tongue being squeezed by her asshole
>They both moan with pleasure as I feel something on the tip of my tongue
>Oh my god she isnt!
>She moans heavily and I can feel pressure on my tongue
>I fight to keep my tongue inside to keep it all in...but she pushes so hard it explodes on the inside of my mouth like a gusher
>I can feel myself about to cum
>Even being used like meat by these two superior beings is enough to get me off
>The alpha gets turned on by this and blows his load deep inside my asshole
>He cums so hard the lunk alarm goes off
>Staff comes over
>"Wow...this OP is so much of a fag he can't even work out at planet fitness"
>Cry and jerk off at home
>>
>>27898934
I knew you were talking about yourself as soon as you said "serial killer"

Why do you autists always do this?
>>
>>27901937

I think it proves both that, and /fit/ has some of the most imaginative and strangely erotic shitposters.

Be back in awhile, I'll try making a massive post with OP's post and the best replies. It'll be shit cause I never screencap stuff like that. Anyone else want to volunteer, go ahead. Maybe we can post some half new shit the next humour thread
>>
>>27901937
>implying OP isn't the guy writing the greentext stories
>>
>>27901983

THE KEKS JUST DON'T STOP COMING
>>
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>walk into the gym a couple of days ago
>only 3 people are there
>one powerlifter bro about 5'9
>soccer player
>and this tiny ripped manlet (5'5-5'6) thinking he's hot shit
>looking at himself in the mirror
>flexing
>taking pics for instagram
>so I walk into the main area where he's in
>I'm 6'1
>he looks at me
>5 mins later he's out
>mfw

Manlets, when will they learn?
>>
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>>27901989
At least when they shitpost it's for the sake of making threads like this into something worthwhile. And hot.
>>
>>27901985
Theyre so
>le edgy
>>
>>27902018

I know what you mean man. I started out laughing... and thats when my erection started poking out...
>>
Skelington here - fuck yo bitch ass b8 op, I'm gonna make it cause I said I am. Honestly I wish you were retarded, cause at least than you'd have an excuse to have the intelligence of a stillborn
>>
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>>27901983
>The voice came from behind me...it was a man's voice
>6'5 245lb guy with 7% bodyfat looks pissed
>You just talked to my gf...get on your knees OP!
>He cums so hard the lunk alarm goes off
The sides never end
>>
>>27898977
>try to score some pussy

Skeleton here too. Been hitting the gym for 6 months now and according to /fit, I have all odds against me

>5'8 skelly manlet

..but I've been getting lots of chicks mirin' me lately. Even my female trainer hit on me (we're currently dating), and I'm not even ottermode yet - I'm told I have a runner's build. It's great to catch a girl staring at my legs, but what they really like is my smile. I smile a lot. I'd say there are more women than men at my gym. I also make sure to dress /fa/. Face wise I'm a 6 maybe 7 on my best day.
>>
>>27902018
This reminds me of that thread a few months back where a guy wrote a fucking book about how the OP went to his highschool reunion and raped his crush.
>>
>>27902040
Odd, it reminded me of the thread where this highschool kid was asking if he should start lifting and some anon greentexted a story about raping him and that if he were fit it probably wouldnt have happened
>>
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>at 6' usually the tallest guy in the gym
>starting to do heavier sets of stuff because I've been working out for a while
>can't manage without a spotter
>make a gym buddy
>he's 6'4 ex-basketball player
>it looks somewhat weird but we manage
>2 months later he says his friend wants to start working out
>his friend is 6'6
>every time I go with them I look like an overcompensating manlet

When will I learn?
>>
Pls keep this thread up till morning.
>>
>>27898851
>this much of a beta

go challenge someone your size.
>>
>>27901983
ayy lmao
>>
>>27902059
Terrible feeling, isn't it?

>tfw a strong 6'1"
>taller than pretty much all of my friends, plus their friends
>minus this one group of friends, where three of them are >6'2"

I hate hanging out with them because it makes me feel like a manlet. I'm not used to being the small guy. Probably going to by some lifts for when i hang out with them, lel.
>>
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This thread is fucking golden
>>
>>27898851
ITT we talk about faggots at our library/university cringes
>Be 3 days ago
>Some 200 pound meathead walks in
>I give him a long, cold stare through my prescription lenses as he walks into the study area.
>intro at every class
>He's embarrassed as fuck
>jock obviously never studied a day in his life
>Goes to complete a differential equation
>This should be good.jpg
>Can hardly solve it
>mfw I was solving complex differentials when I was 13 in summer school
>I let out audible laugh
>he's trying so hard, his face is all scrunched up
>He completely messes up a calculation and gets totally lost
>scribbling all over the page, probably used to doing that with crayons back in school
>Someone helps him solve it
>tries just basic integration
>can barely do it, horrible logic
> solves some calculations to find the hypotenuse
>I hate when people think using pythagoreon theorem is math, they were all pythagoreon triples anyway
>I see him in the library trying to look studious
>tsk at him and shake my head
>He goes red as fuck, like tomato red, probably road rage
>Hasn't come back since
He went back where jocks belong; in the gym, pointlessly lifting slabs of iron.
>>
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>>27898851

thank you putin
>>
>>27902374

>road rage
>>
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>>27901989 here, alright, never done a screencap of more than one post, here is the basic post, I don't know if people are done posting so you can add more, or change this around if you want
>>
>>27902458
THANKYOU BASED PUTIN
>>
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>>27902586

Here's one with assorted gay comments. You can change this if you want too, or just take the first one and alter that.

Yeah, I know the file is huge, but people were responding with massive replies. Didn't know what to do but wanted to screencap this thread at least.
>>
>>27898922
>>
>>27898988
>>
OP you're a fucking faggot. He's at least trying. You're clearly a weak person with no respect for others. Fucking help people, not look down on them. We all have to start somewhere. Some later than others.
>>
>>27899795
but if scooby didn't when wuld jason and the jeff argonauts? lat pulldown
>>
>>27902603
Haha. Next time OP is being a faggot we have the ultimate toolbox
>>
>>27899650
>squatting in the squat rack
>DYEL comes up and mumbles
>didn't catch what he said, for some reason he held up his hand
>5 minutes later I'm still squatting
>walk past DYEL
>happen to see he's posting on 4chan while getting assrammed by 3 large African Americans
>pic related
>It's OP
>>
>>27902778

Couldn't agree more. I'm sure Zyzz looked like that skeleton to some faggots when he started.
>>
>>27899267
>thinking just because average people don't look like this, they have no right to try.
No.
Fuck you and everything you stand for
The problem is that these DYEL fuckers have no respect for the weight, they're intentionally lifting more then they can handle based off their own bloody insecurity about how much they can handle

If they were doing exercises with weights that wouldn't cause them to break form every single rep, I wouldn't give a shit.

But what these D.Y.E.L's do, they disrespect the metal they hold.

Would not invite to homegym if I had one
>>
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>>27902847
>>
>>27898851

did you teleport behind him and slice him with your katana too lord euphoria?
>>
>>27904192
FUAAARKK
>>
>on a cruise, tiny room with dumbells for "gym"
>dumbells up to 32kg
>bye bye gains
>kid comes in with laptop
>sets it up right in the middle
>room has no music
>opens windows media player
>please be acceptable music
>WELCOME TO THE P90X BEACH BODY WORKOUT!

>same room, different day
>two girls, about 15/16 (I'm 20 but easily pass for 18)
>tiny shorts, sports bra
>start doing the splits and every other sexy stretch you can think of
>literally touching the low ceiling with their toes
>hotter one says "you're strong!" when I bench the 32kgs for a set of 20
>"t-thanks, I hate dumbells, never use them at home"
>"oh"
>"the ones here aren't heavy enough for anything useful"
>"i see"
>awkward pause
>turns back to her friend and giggles
>return to my bench
>only us three in the tiny room
>do one more set and leave silently
>do not return for the remaining week
>they giggle whenever seeing me around the ship but don't say anything
>tfw no 16 year old flexible gf
>tfw no cruise friends at all
>tfw glad to be home
>>
>>27902603
>>27902586
Noice. Thanks bro.
>>
>>27900100
I'm from manila and I can confirmed that most of Filipinos that go to the gym are like this. Have them spend a month in a gym and they act like fitness instructors.
>>
OP here, jesus fucking christ you're all cancer. Do you want a bunch of fucking 18+ amateurs struggling with the bar? Struggling with the most basic shit? The fuck? I've seen little kids bench the bar, fuck you guys. This thread has proven that you're all a bunch of fucking amateurs, probably skeletons and fatties. You're so fucking gay.
>>
>>27898851
Are you a receptionist or something?
As far as I can tell you were there sitting and looking what is new kid in gym doing.
>>
>>27906684
No, I was doing my regular routine in mostly facing a mirror while this faggot was trying to lift, and the benchpress was right across from me
>>
>>27906889
You're a pretty big asshole and it's no wonder you post on 4chan.
>skeleton is weak
>skeleton goes to gym
>make skeleton feel bad for being weak
>skeleton doesn't come back and stays weak
>brag about it on a chinese cartoon image board
>>
>>27906940
he had his fucking chance as I stated already in this thread. He was like 18-20. It's too late.
>>
>>27906980
You're a fucking douche.
>>
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>>27899964
i haven't laughed so hard on green text for a very long time
>>
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>>27898851
Way to go OP.
>>
>>27907078
So what? I'd rather be a buff douche and the aplle of women's eye then be dome skin and bones pale kid
>>
>>27902458
THANKYOU BASED PUTIN
>>
>>27899743
>doing pulldowns
>not doing pullups
>Believing he's so alpha that he can own the pulldown machine
>not doing pullups
>>
>>27900058
believe it or not, you actually helped that faggot out by giving him some bonus protein
>>
>>27899099
i did soccer but i did pole vault at track instead of running.
we called ourselves pole fancies. shit was cash
>>
>>27905335
>no cruise friends
Iktfb
>>
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>few days ago
>finished my warmup
>go do some squats
>some skelly ginger is in the rack
>obviously he isnt finishing any soon
>tell him to find some other equipment
>"Nah, I'm okay"
>grab his arm and pull him out
>tell him "check out those dumbells"
>see fear in his eyes
>suddenly smell of onions
>"wtf, did you just fart?"
>"N-no!"
>"Get lost"
>finished 2 sets of squatz, going for the third one
>I feel someone grabbing my arm
>must be that ginger
>"You dickhead,I told you that-"
>grip on my arm tightens strongly
>I look back
>It's Shrek
>IT'S WORKOUTS TIME LADEH
>he lays down beneath me and grabs my shoulders with his hands
>his 13 inch cock rips through his pants
>SQUAT WILL YA?
>I squat down while his hands provide the weight
>as I go down his cock enters my anus
>the pain is insufferable, I can't do it anymore
>suddenly the image of Mark Rippetoe goes through my mind
>I have to go full down to make squat be of good form
>I force myself down and I feel every vein on Shrek's dick in my guts
>I feel happy for not letting Mark down
>as I am finishing the set, Shrek ejaculates profusely into my bowels
>I'm thankful for him for giving me his proteins
>I fall down on the ground feeling pain
>ITS OGRE NOW
>the ginger kid starts playing Mozart's Requiem on his Iphone and sings in tenor:
>Shrek sit amor
>Shrek sit vita
>>
>>27908299
It was just a matter of time.
>>
>>27907290
Shut up.
>>
>Be OP
>Making fun of young hungry skeletons and DYELs at the gym like i spend nearly every day
>Arrive home after a exhausting day of not working out and IRL shitposting
>Hear the door being unlocked and opened
>It's my qt314 hungry skeleton bf back from work
>Grab his stuff and welcome him home, he greets me with a kiss and smacks my ass
>He grabs a beer from the fridge and heads to the bedroom, a D E V I L I S H smirk on his face
>Know how much he likes to unwind after work when he gets home, my anus twitching in anticipation
>He's lounging on the bed with a cigaret in one hand and the beer on the nightstand (No wonder he cant make any gainz)
>Begin teasing his bulge through his dress pants, getting it nice and hard
>Finally he rewards me by removing his pants, revealing his enormous 11'' cock
>He takes drags from his cigaret and drinks from his beer while i'm going to town on his dick, deep throating the full length down to the balls like the experienced faggot i am
>Tells me to rim his ass, it's all sweaty from a long day at work
>I obey without hesitation because i am OP
>Finishes his beer and grabs me by the hair, turns me around face down, ass up onto the bed
>He JAMs two fingers into my cunt, furiously fingering my fuckhole
>After he feels my boi pussy is a little loosened up he shoves his entire 11'' dick into my ass without reservation
>Rapidly delivers quick, full thrusts of punishment onto my puckered butthole
>After 10 minutes of hard pounding he floods my pussy with his load
>I orgasm hands free from the thought of his hungry skeleton babbies swimming around inside me
>He takes the empty beer bottle and shoves it into my gaping and sore butthole
>Tells me to leave it in there while he takes a shower and let the load drip into the bottle, he wants to watch me drink it when he gets out
>Happily agree cause i'm such an eager to please dirty slut
>>
>>27902458
THANKYOU BASED PUTIN
>>
>>27899964
top kek
>>
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>>27899638
>that pic
jesus god in heaven why
>>
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>>27904178

What the fuck, that's a pic of sexy yoshi, you really responded all that shit?

Top kek, OP and his squad of goons are a bunch of tryhards. Welcome to your first week on a Chan

>OP's face after he's slurped significant amounts of semen
>>
I didn't think there were so many dipshits on /fit/
>>
>>27911498

>Tells me to leave it in there while he takes a shower and let the load drip into the bottle, he wants to watch me drink it when he gets out

Noice
>>
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>Last year, home for summer
>had been working out for a year up to then, SS, had put on 30 lbs, obv not all muscle but b/c all of the free time I made crazy fucking gains that summer (5 days a week workouts)
>Was doing normal workout, squats bench deadlift weighted dips etc etc
>see new dyel bro come in in a sleeveless shirt, walks up to only other squat rack
>proceeds to begin SS routine
>replaces back squat with sumo squat, replaces deadlifts with rack lifts/shrugs, benches in rack with safety bars high as fuck 1/4 ROM
>see him do the same for a few weeks, proud, tho he still is pretty shit
>still have hope for him, we all start shit

1 year later to this summer
>Come back to gym
>Made crazy gains in that year, joined rowing team at uni, switched to a push/pull, body passed original goal body, directionless
>switched back to SS-like routine for summer b/c don't wanna work out as often per week
>setting up for front squats one day, look over and see dyel bro
>looks exactly like last year
>walks over to Overhead press machine, loads up 95 lbs
>does 1/2 ROM
>mfw now he starts every workout like that and follows it with a random assortment of machines throughout the bottom floor
>mfw he'd be making more gains if he were just a curlbro

can we have a moment for the lost?
>>
ITT: /fit/ e-stats about how amazing they are and how much of a loser everyone else is
>>
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>>27912903
I dont think you've read the thread.
>>
>>27912750
Lel xD SS claims another victim.
>>
>>27899743
Awesome
>>
>>27899519

auh tis tick as fuck
>>
I wonder if this thread went as OP planned.
>>
>>27913561

I be honest, no real opinion on the hungry skellys really, but damn if this thread didnt turn into OP getting BTFO, and then into OP being the hero of a number of gay greentexts.

Only on /fit/
>>
>>27899519
>my equipment
>in a gym where everyone pays the same monthly rate

holy shit you're fucking autistic. You don't own the things you use.
>>
>>27911498
Hahahahaha!
>>
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>ctrl+f kek
>16
>>
>>27898988
I feel obligated to respond to this massive case of #REKT. Though that goes for the thread in general.
>>
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>>27898922
/fit/, everybody!
>>
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>>27899519
Are you a gym owner?
>>
>>27898851
Im currently benching 250 max and im 16 like suck a fucking dick looser haha. And i weigh 170 btw, im a wrestler too.
Haha faggot
>>
>>27898988
Lol look at this tangible butthurt.
>>
>>27917226
Post pic
>>
>>27899772
underrated post
>>
>>27898922
Every one starts somewhere, remember that.
>>
>>27900121
I burst out laughing. I agree with you though.
>>
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>All these gay greentext stories about getting bullied, sucking dick, and being fucked senseless, mostly about OP
>Supposed to make fun of and humiliate him for his shitty b8 / assholeish attitude
>Actually wishing you were on the receiving end of these homo situations.
>>
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this fucking thread man
>>
>>27899650
I would have finished my sets and then went to find the 2.5 lb dumbells, which I would be clean and pressing when you returned. Would use all acting skills to make it seem harder than the 5th rep of high intensity squats. If you asked me why I was still there, I'd look you dead in the eye, say "ain't no thang but a chicken wang" and go back to clean and pressing. Would continue until you left the gym. Jpop would be playing from my phone on full blast. No ragrets.
>>
>>27917957
We are simply showing how much of a faggot this OP is. His faggotry is so intense it leads us to tell tails of his faggoty faggy exploits.
>>
>>27899889
better than being a fatass like you
>>
>>27900211
Just realised but his shoulders looks like N64 graphics.
>>
>>27899650
Nice bro
Then I power squatted 1000lbs
Capt reporting in
>>
>>27900014
That's a toddler's anus isn't it? Fucking nippon
>>
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>>27898851
you fucking suck op, You're the reason some people dont go to the gym, instead of helping him out, you fucked up and made yourself a douche

>TL;DR OP is a fucking faggot who can't get over his own insecurities, so he judges other people.
>>
bump this till morning plzzzzzz
>>
>>27918883
Why not contribute before bed? Might provide more bumps.
>>
>>27902458
OH SHIT THANK YOU BASED PUTIN
>>
>>27898851
Fuck you OP, I could only bench 40 pounds when I started off.
>>
>>27898851
Today I saw a guy doing squats with the barbell for curls and standing in his toes.
>TFW too beta to go and correct his form
And besides the squat was being used by a faggot with 20lbs plates doing supersets with the leg press
>>
PLEASE NO STOPERINO I WANT THIS HERE IN THE MORNING FAGGOTS
>>
>>27919246

What can you do now?

I'm starting off and can barely do above 65. It's just nice to know there's a light at the end of the tunnel.
>>
>>27919379
it gets better brah my bench went from 95 ->145 in like 4 months
>>
>>27898988

This already feels like a classic post. Along with >>27899964

Since this thread made OP already ded, might as well ask where tf this is from ? >>27915820 it was posted twice
>>
>>27900014

EVERYONE JUST IGNORES THIS? WHAT TE FUCK? THAT BABY ANUS CAN TAKE LITERALLY 8 INCHES GOTDAM NIPPON BABY ANUS FOLDED OVER THOUSAND TIME
>>
>>27902586
In have the weirdest boner. No homo.
>>
>this thread still up

Oh man I forgot these greentexts

I was in the gym today imagining these scenarios between sets and snickering like a girl
>>
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>>27899964
>>
>>27919656
Ever start getting hard to some of them?
>>
>>27919681

I meant the funny ones m8 where /fit/izen goes on a gym rampage
>>
>>27919689
They're all hilarious to me. Some of them just have the added benefit of being arousing.
>>
>>27898851
the fuck is wrong with you? So this guy is trying to work out and you have to observe like the gay shit you are, and make sure everyone notices your opinion on the matter? pleb
>>
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>>27902374
>road rage
>>
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>>27919728
I concur. You could have taken this future /fit/izen under your wing, helped him out. I only started lifting at 20, and I had my dad to help me with form and build me up to respectable lift. Some people don't have that person to show them. You could have made this guy the future Zyzz! You OP, are a cunt. I hope you're fucking happy with yourself, you're a disgrace to /fit/
>>
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>>27898988

>Actually know where this image is from
>Perfect response
>Actually am slightly aroused however

>>27919616

JoJos bizarre adventure, part 3. It's /fit/ approved for sure, get ready to start 'mirin.
>>
130lb 5'3 Filipino guy thinks he's the most hard core bodybuilder in the gym

>shadowboxes all the time
>"they should take out some equipment and add a punching bag"

>always brings 5 manlet friends to do curls and curl variations with

>loudly tells obviously fake stories
>"I was at the doctor today and got some liquid codiene so I asked for some sprite to mix it with and they gave it to me. I almost got a prescription before another doc noticed what I was doing "

>always wears a snapback
>never wears sleeves
>long greasy hair


Pls leave
>>
>>27919999

>Can't even scam Hydrocodone cough syrups

Fucking pleb
>>
>>27900152
Do you even meek?
>>
>>27898988
ayy lmao
>>
this guy at my gym literally gets on his knees (or sits if he's on a bench) and prays before every set. he's pretty swole too. i wonder if jesus gives gains to those who believe.
>>
>>27898988
I can't even finish it, I'm dying.
this is middle-school level humor but I'm laughing histatically
>>
>>27906980
>Well adjusted school life
>Goes on 4chan
>select uno
>>
>>27920337
thanks autocorrect
>>
Man, OP needs to come back. I know he got anally devastated, but his arrogant attitude inspired some of the most beautiful stories I've ever seen.

>>27902603

TOP KEK, finally some /fit/shit that isn't forced
>>
>>27898922
If we were animals in the wild, I'd personally go out of my way to eat you.

But gr8 b8 m8
>>
Is... is having trouble curling 30 pounds (dumbbell) after a few weeks/months really that bad?

Fuck me.
>>
>>27898851

>At the gym doing squats.
>Do my warmup and finally get to my first work set which I fail 4 reps in.
>This asshole is fucking asshole is doing some stupid fucking circuit training on the platform beside me.
>Dumbell power C&J, bosu ball pushups, and something else that I can't remember but it's retarded regardless.
>After I've finished my rest time I go up to him while he's resting and ask him if he can help me rerack my weight.
>He tells me he's working out and I should take the weights off.
>Give him a look of bewilderment.
>As I'm searching for someone else who will help me rerack he continues to stand there for 20 or 30 seconds more before starting his next set.
>Ask these two guys in the squat rack two down from mine if they'll help me.
>One of them does.
>Nothing but seething fucking rage for the rest of my workout.

Seriously, this is the first fuckwit who's declined helping me rerack in the 3 or so months I've been lifting. Fuck these boypussy, circuit training, crossfitter pieces of shit, they can all burn in hell.
>>
>>27920561

It's not 'bad', but id highly recommend looking at your form, and the exercises you are doing. Look up some guides, reduce the weight, and the try to build up linearly like you're supposed to. If you literally do everything perfect, but can't gain (this is like, 1% of people who say 'Im stalling and can't make gains but I do everything perfect!') you need to look into it with your doctor.

Btw, you're gonna make it bro, don't let this discourage you.
>>
>>27920774
How many reps should we classify having trouble as, as well? Thanks for your help though, I'm p sure it's because my schedule is spotty as everliving fuck with at worst fucking weeks off at a time.
>>
>>27898988

just thinking about how if this guy decided to not post this, or just post regularly in this thread, maybe things would have gone as OP wanted them to. what a fucking de-rail.
>>
RIP in peace thread.

>tfw you don't need to do lats or abdominals today because this thread did it for you
>>
>DYEL mode
>doing squatz at my usual time
>8'2 BEASTMODE says I'm in his rack
>He undoes his shorts and rips mine off
>bends me over wanting to take my anal virginity
>let out a rancid protein fart, which succesfully incapacitate the beast
>the gym owner congratulates me through his gasmask for taking out the beast
>offers his daughter as price and wants to crown me as king of the gym
>crown disintegrates due to horrid stench
The usual
Thread posts: 306
Thread images: 74


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