EMERGENCY

color of jeans and length of shirt please

That jacket is literally your only option. How bad is the rip?

>>12176977
If you're wearing undies, all is well.

>>12176982
longer than an average shirt but not long enough I think. shirt is like a reddish orange
jeans are typical jeans

>>12176984
it's towards the underside so it's not really visible from the front. it's in 2 places. I can give the jacket a shot but it's a bit to bulky to be around my waist. I should probably just roll with it

>>12176977
i dunno man, hope you come out alive

>>12176977
call your mom to pick you up bitch boi

Crabwalk sideways with your hands on your crotch and say "woopsie daisies!"

Say you feel sick and ask to go home, i pray your pants are the same colour as your jeans or similiar

staple them back together

Covering it with the jacket will only attract attention. What you want to do is pull your dick out through the hole; this will have the opposite effect, since everyone will assume that you're comfortable with the rip and that it must be intentional. Furthermore, any pubic hairs that emerge with it will function as antennae and help guide you safely home.

>>12177557
did you just read my mind, i was going to post approximately this

if somebody notices just laugh about it and say you have no idea how this happens. if the rip is minor then nobody will probably notice it. if its big, then dont point it out until anybody says anything about it

>>12178787
congratz, you're both autistic and unoriginal

>>12176977
just cover ur schlonger donger

next time wear a longer shirt 2 avoid any embarrassing dong catastrophes

>>12178821
At least i'm not a cunt like you