/fa/ feels thread

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>tfw depressed

Fuck anyone who thinks it's cool to be sad or uses it as a fashion statement. This is awful, I don't care about clothing or anything anymore.

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>>12088131
>Be 6'1", ugly, white, 18 year old
>Have a nice Rick Owens sweater
>Nobody likes it, NOBODY but me

I don't care for the most part, but it's like come on leave me the fuck alone I don't care if my sweater is "weird" or not in your eyes

also, the ugly part sucks pretty bad

>>12088554
i think i might have 'walking depression', i've gradually lost interest in all the things i've cared about, i've also become very insecure and have little to no self confidence unless i'm kinda drunk
>tfw just want the old me back ;_;

>>12088131

>>have lots and lots of "acquaintances" but not a single real friend
>>tfw kissless virgin, but not even that ugly (not saying I'm attractive), just incredibly worried about the effect rejection will have on my already low self-esteem so I never make any moves period, never talk to a girl unless she initiates
>>wake up, go online aimlessly browsing threads and grailed for clothing that I'll never actually buy, sleep at 2 am, rinse and repeat thru the entire holiday
>>check social media to see everyone is out and about with friends/significant other while youre doing fuck all at home
>>tfw no one invites you to anything ever but youre too beta to confront them about it

That hit too close to home op, I don't even have the motivation to do entertaining things like watch a movie or read a book, let alone study. This site is fucking ruining me.

>tfw too poor for high end clothes so i just buy fakes to look and feel good

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>>12088131
>>wide hips with large thighs from biking to school 24/7 but the rest of my body is thin so every clothing size looks weird on me

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>Tfw when I look at the mirror and tell myself i fucking hate you
>shut down in the darkness play vidya and cry inside
But life is good even though this shit happens to me but my creativity is gone and I don't know how to come back from it this is what happens when you do nothing it drains you.
I don't give a fuck about friends though

>>12088768
I was better being here than not being here lul

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>>12088771
I saw a girl wearing fake pirate blacks the other day and walked past her and just said "Nice yeezys". She looked really happy and said thanks.

Then I realized that not everyone can afford expensive things, its okay to wear fakes as long as it makes you look good and feel better about yourself.

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>>12088768
A-are you me?

Holy shit I know that feel

>>12088873
Keep lying to yourself bub.

Also everyone in this thread should just get a hobby or fucking go outside and do something even if it's just a walk dont sit in and spam a japanese message board

>>12088882
Lying? What?
I never wear fakes, all of my shit is legit. I'm just saying that I understand why people wear them.

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>>12088554
hi there, i have BPD so i know what depression is like, what usually helps me is to simply try to man up and wiev it as a weaknes, i know that its hard, but think of it as a blanket warm black that you have to pull off and face the world, youll develop tougher skin if you do it, i know that a world where you have to try your best to not be miserable in is not worth trying for, but thats just what your mind is telling you now, hope this makes sense

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>tfw bowlegs
>trousers never look good

>>12089138
are you some malnourished shithole immigrant ?

>>12089149
White-British

its just depressing because life is going good for me, at least from an economical standpoint. I have money, a house, food, etc but I feel so fucking empty and alone with no motivation or drive to do anything

>>12088131
>wealthy family
>attractive
>closet full of expensive clothing
>ex addict/alcoholic
>promising career
>terribly bored at all times
>tfw I have had everything and still turned to drugs and alcohol because nothing made me happy
>now I don't have drugs or alcohol, primary motivation in life is solely greed
>even when I buy what I want, I still don't feel any meaningful happiness
>100k car, 25k watch collection, closet full of slp and rick, extremely overpriced top floor apartment with one of the best views of the city
>broke up with long term girlfriend
>flings only make me feel more empty

W2c meaning of life? There has to be more to it doesn't there? People would kill to be in my position so why am I unable to enjoy it?

>existential and identity crisis
>depressed
>really difficult to lose weight

Fuck, man, it's been a week, since i first started my 'one meal a day' diet

>>12089626
start a biz

>>12089626
Lack of projects, hobbies, goals?

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>>12088131
Shit that posts was like looking into a mirror

>>12089626
You've got to enjoy the little things in life. Like the lack of success of others, and anti-depressants.

Gee, sorry to hear about your issues, boys. I've personally found open Platonic friendships to be the bedrock of satisfaction in my life. You have to make the effort to form them, strengthen them, and maintain them, and that includes things like taking social risks and facing the possibility of rejection, but it's worth it.

Also, alongside this, I strongly, strongly recommend School of Life and their "psychology" videos for self-understanding, perhaps their "philosophical meditation", as well as traditional Eastern meditation.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WY08aXxor20

good vid on meditation from an Oxford professor

>>12088131
>new clothes doesn't excite me anymore
>can't wait for school to start so people can see my fits

>>12089987

Open Platonic friendships was probably bad way to term it, I mean platonic relationships were one can be as open as one likes with the other - sharing fears, hopes, concerns, and importantly, trivia and general life.

>>12089635
>'one meal a day' diet
im doing that right now and it's working really well

what problems are you having?

i usually sleep until noon and eat around 4-6pm

>>12089626

Consider trying a hobby that involves creating something - art, crafts, music. Something where you get have a tangible result of your labours.

>>12090005
this. photography is great imo.
also: sports. "creating" something out of your body, shaping it the way you want it to be, also can be a big boost.

>>12090000
Nice numbers

>>12090000

Damn, could have been so much more interesting

>>12090005
>>12090016
Thanks for the advice you guys are probably right. I've never been very creative, just laser focused on making money. Now that I've gotten there I've realized it isn't what I thought. I'll try to create something or pick up a hobby.

>>12090041

Do you work in high finance? Curiosity.

Aside from that, yeah, money really just isn't all that much. Relationships - friends, family, significant other - are so much more important in determining our wellbeing. Also things like diet, sleep, and exercise significantly affect our neurochemistry, so also make sure you are on top of that.

>>12090050
Yes, I work in finance primarily but am involved with several different industries

I've had great relationships, been in shape, had a good diet etc and was still pretty miserable. Think it must be an issue with my mindset and thinking patterns, as i have always been this way regardless of external things for as long as I can remember

>>12090018
>>12090032
fuck what a waste
i feel bad now
kek

>>12090062

Hmm, considering doing the classic switch into a start-up or NGO?

Yeah, I tend to think that there are three levels of issues - patterns of thought,emotions (insecurities and whatnot formed over time from relationships and from childhood experience), and brain chemistry.

I hope you have a close friend with whom you can discuss some of these patterns of thought, I've found that it can be very liberating to do so.

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after 20 years of trying to obtain a meaningful relationship with someone who loves me, I'm suddenly happy with being alone. Does this get me closer to finding love or not?

>>12090126
It depends on the basis of your happiness with being alone.

How badly do you want to find love, and how do you think you will find it? Films and teevee give us a tremendously warped and idealised idea of how it all works, it's really terrible.

>>12090104
I've thought about it but finance doesn't really give me much happiness. At the end of the day I'm just making money by doing something ultimately meaningless. I've been considering going to med school...the pay is significantly worse than what I'm currently doing but at least I'll be doing something that makes people's lives better. I don't need the money anyway, I'm set for a comfortable life even if I just stopped working permanently today

I have a few close friends and a therapist, but she's a woman and so I feel that she does not truly understand a lot of topics we discuss, especially when it comes to the difference between ambition and greed (literally 90% of our sessions)

Life is much harder without drugs or alcohol I have to say. I've been sober over 2 years, but previously relied on it as a crutch for everything. My unhappiness could at least be managed somewhat by drinking and using pretty hard drugs frequently but obviously that is unsustainable.

>tfw chubby manlet
>tfw won't ever look good in anything I wear

>>12090199

I don't like the idea of medicine at all, just very yucky and awkward. I think I'll be gravitating towards academia, teaching, or culture once I've made enough to be comfortable. My friends say I'd make a great Housemaster at a boarding school.

How do you differentiate between ambition and greed, then? To me, ambition has a lot to do with validation that we get from the admiration of others, the prestige, that sort of thing. I recently came to the conclusion that it was very plausible that I wanted to do a lot of prestigious things it would be a way to fast-track me to getting approval from my parents and forming a closer relationship with them.

I'm very sorry to hear about your thing with drugs and alcohol - I've had a couple of friends who've had their mental issues compounded badly by drugs, it's just so sad. I've heard that it's in adolescence that people learn to turn to things when they're sad - it's usually (and more healthily) friends, but some people discover alcohol and drugs instead.

>>12090208

Work out and control your diet, buddy. Not only will it improve your body, it will improve your mind loads too.

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How to get self-discipline?

I have a lot of projects and some recquire a lot of practice, and it seems that I keep staying in what I already know instead of pushing myself further and further.

Of course it's not a big deal in comparison to your problems but I just can't go forward because of that and I have kind of a deadline to launch myself into this productivity circle.

>>12090243

Incremental improvement. Art of Manliness has an article on the 20 mile march. Google it and have a read, I think it applies to a lot of things.

>>12090270
Thanks man, I'll try to bring something out of it.

>>12090232

I mean even if I lose weight I'm a short legged manlet, everything I wear looks like shit on me.

>>12090385
At least you won't be a fat short legged manlet

No one cares nearly as much as you

>>12090000
I don't feel any difficulties right now, it feels okay, it's just that i can't really lose my weight idk why. I eat in the morning and snacks around 3-4 PM and nothing else. But again, this is still the holiday season and i'm not doing anything.

im 5'3

>>12088131
been there with the kissless virgin troubles
youve really just gotta not be a puthy boi and take a risk once in a while, trust your gut

>>12088131
>>tfw theres no one to even go out and have fun with so why bother wearing effay stuff

>>tfw kissless virgin, but not even that ugly (not saying I'm attractive), just incredibly worried about the effect rejection will have on my already low self-esteem so I never make any moves period, never talk to a girl unless she initiates

>>wake up, go online aimlessly browsing threads and grailed for clothing that I'll never actually buy, sleep at 2 am, rinse and repeat thru the entire holiday

FUUUUUCK -_-

also

>used to be really skinny but now it's hard to loose weight

>my two friends who i talk to irl are assholes to me like 30% of the time for no reason and my nicest friend who always understands never does anything with me irl.

>too afraid(social anxiety is horrible) to even look at people i dont know. cant make new friends / talk to girls.

>no useful skills except for entry level photoshop,coding,3d stuff. cant get past beginner stage of anything i learn.

>cant find people who share any of my interests in anything

>even though i love art and music i lack the creativity to do it myself.

the worst part is that my life is ok and i dont really have it bad, and therefore my problems are ignored by most.

>turned 26 2 months ago but still face mostly same problems as before
>lots of acquaitances but almost no friends (largely because of how fucked up the scandinavian society is)
>never had a long term gf
>not sure if I will ever get one because my standarts are higher than what I got to offer
>feel more ugly than I used to, probably am
>low self-esteem because of that
>feel like I could get laid a lot more if only I could convey a slightest bit of interest because I act so aloof all the time
>alcohol doesn't help
>slav genetics made me quite resistant to it anyway
>still at uni, can't wait to get out
>on the bright side though
>work a lot these days so more money for sicc cops
>developed my own style which I regurarly get complimented on
>don't ask 4chans opinions (not just clothes, everything) anymore because all they did is ruined me with their autism

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Might as well

>Bought my first pair of Y-3s on boxing day and have never been happier. Sister calls me a faggot and my parents say they're a waste of money

>Only watched anime in highschoool during the period that I had no friends but now im slowly getting drawn back into it because I have nobody to talk to. (No college friends)

>Do my best to make my mom happy but cant get over the thought of her thinking im a disappointment

>When I was buying my Y-3s, the girl helping me out really hit it off with me and we ended up going out the next day. Check her insta only to find out she has a boyfriend and shes probably trying to leech commission off me.

>Wake up at 4pm, stay in my room until 2 am, go downstairs for food and comeback up to look at shit I cant buy online

>Sometimes go to the mall alone to just get myself out of the house but I never buy anything.

>Im really into all of the expensive brands that the rich asians students wear (Fendi, CDG, etc) but it just doesn't look right on a 6"2 white guy

>Thinking about biting the bullet real soon

>>12090807
>>12090717
scandinavia is harsh my man

>have a great sense of fashion, and only wear things that look good on me.

> Face still looks like shit.

I just want to look good

>>12088768

>>tfw no one invites you to anything ever but youre too beta to confront them about it

how the fuck do you get people to invite you to things? I feel I have to initiate everything

>>12090891
Those are some beautiful shoes. As long as you're in college you should keep your head up, you have something to focus on and achieve. I'm sure your mom is proud of you. Also going out with the girl from the store is alpha as fuck, even if she was just pretending to be nice, she could have just ghosted you but she didn't.

Good luck man, things will be alright.

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>my female best friend who wears a £10 orange berghaus as her main coat

>>12088554
it's horrible anon

i don't want to do anything and i lost interest in everything i loved

>>12089761
underrated post

>>12088975
Kind of the same. I have DID, which can get kind of shitty, but dressing nicer has actually been helpful.

>>12088588
post a picture of it

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>>12088131
should have copped a personality instead of copping 4chan meme clothes

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tfw having coffee tomorrow with a qt3.14 who ive had a crush on for a while. Maybe there is hope.
>although we're both going back to different colleges in like a week so idk what to do really

>>12091276
I wish I knew how anon

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>Deeply insecure about my looks now that I'm no longer in highschool and it matters more.
>Every day look at myself in the mirror and think "this isn't who I want to be,"
>Think about saving up for surgery plus hair transplant for my temples.
>realize that I would forever be living a lie and would never be a truly great person sans looks if I did.
>Must forever be either below average and truthful or average and insincere, and no amount good character would counter the glaring vanity and falsity of the latter.

>>12091398
I swear this is me.
I'm about a 5/10, maybe 6/10 on a good day and I'm really considering getting plastic surgery for my asian nose and maybe something about my cheeks too. Every time I look in the mmirror I hate the way I look. Even if I get surgery I'll still be empty inside with no personality but at least I'll b-be a-attractive r-right?

>>12089626
>slp and rick
that's your problem right there (at this point in your life, that is) -- you fell for some of the worst memes.

>>12091518
saint laurent paris and rick owens arn't memes outside of a japanese anime forum

>tall, quiet artsy guy
>secretly right-leaning politically, love Trump
>I keep my views to myself because I go to high school in eastern Massachusetts and all the cute girls are average prep sluts and tumblr girls.

>>12091554

high school- love trump

who hurt you?

>>12091557
haven't you heard the phrase "A democratic is a republican who hasn't been robbed yet"

>>12091554
wow hello twin, except CT here and not in high school

>>12091554
are political views really that important to you, that you seperate out possible friends or even girlfriends by that? apart from two people my circle of friends (and all my ex-gfs/flings) have different opinions on politics. they're all great people whom i love having in my life - politics is just a topic we disagree upon.

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What bmi is she and what exercises do I have to do to get that stomach?

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>have a constant need for attention
>can't even go outside my house without constantly feeling the need for people to notice me

>>12088554
it's grim anon i feel for you. Hope everything gets better soon tho you'll get through it <3<3<3

>>12089626
get into effective altruism man. Spread some of your cash about and help folks

>>12089626
start painting

>>12091518
True to an extent. I liked Rick while I was in my edgy nihilism phase but it doesn't really fit my personality any more and I never wear it, just clutters up my closet

I genuinely love SLP though, it is the only clothing brand that I really like the look of and that fits my face and body type. Additionally I don't look like a fucking lunatic when I wear it on my days off, compared to the way I looked when I was always in Rick, yohji and Julius

The only meme about SLP is how expensive everything is but after you pass a certain income threshold it really doesn't matter.

>>12092278
run and eat healthy

if you want to look better than her, start swimming

>got a pair of jeans that fit me perfectly in every aspect, even length which is rare.
>constantly going to the mirror and checking myself with them in various tops and shoes

>>12089626
Get back with your girl

I'm 27 and still a virgin. I never wanted to have sex with anyone just for the sake of it, and I have never been in a relationship for the same reason. I just never met anyone I clicked with. Had crushes, sure, but never pursued anything. It just never felt right to me. The thing is, now I enjoy my solitude and time with myself. I enjoy doing things on my own time, listening to music when I want, watching movies when I want, and so on. I'm not compelled to be in a relationship, I'm still discovering myself and feel like I have a lot more to do with myself before being with anyone. At the same time, I feel this is 'weird' and not 'normal.' Coupled with my depression and anxiety, it's tough to deal with sometimes. I'm not mad at myself or anything, I'm just more upset that I haven't experienced something as ingrained in our culture like sex. So, I don't know.

>>12088554
I can't fucking stand all the dumb shits that think its funny or hip to post about how depressed or mentally unstable they are like no, its fucking horrific I wouldn't wish it upon anyone

>finally not fat
>Can buy clothes I want
>Have a fucking stutter and talk too fast and quiet
>I mouth words after I say them without realizing it
>Too insecure about speech to talk to people irl
>Just wanna kill myself

>>12094382
Try to find a speech therapist and it'll help with the social stuff a lot

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>Asian
>Manlet
>poor

wew, I do seem to attract a lot of ugly weebs and kpopfangirls though

at least I've got nice hair and clear skin r-right....?

>>12093605
>>12093605

i would encourage you to experiment, get out of your comfort zone a little bit. i don't say this to try to "cure" you or turn you into a normie. but if you haven't experienced it, then you don't really know what you're missing and whether or not it's something you might enjoy.

so take some steps to date somebody. if it feels wrong you can totally stop at any time. maybe it's just not for you, and that's fine too. it's not for everyone and that's okay.

but years down the line, at the end of your life, wouldn't you want to know that you at least found out for yourself?

>>12089626
you cant really appreciate money without knowing what it feels like to not have it

>>12088131
>Have good taste
>Lots of clothes

>None of them fit because I'm a fat fuck now due to drinking and too much partying with drugs here and there
I'm so sad. I barely even come here anymore

Loosing weight is harder than I thought I miss being 150 lbs I'm well over 200 now. On the bright side I've never gotten laid as much as I'm getting now surprisingly

>>12088554
yeah man
i've been sad before but any normal person, but for the first time lately i've just been so consistently consistently sad and i know im depressed, i know because its such a real chemical sadness. im not sad about anything in particular my spirits are just so low. im sleeping and eating pretty normally but i feel like im on an MDMA comedown except i havent done MD in months and motnhs. my brain is just lacking that seratonin.

im gonna see someone about it soon if it persists i might need pills

>>12095282
>sad before but any normal person

should be, sad before LIKE any normal person sorry

>>12089138
>>12089166
fuck sake this is the same as me, i have massive thighs as well which contrast horrifically to my v skinny body

>>12091549
Exactly. To anyone else, wearing generic would be liked more.

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>>12095154
same bro 150>205
6 weeks in gym so far
feelin buff again tho
hopefully 160 by march and got good fits waiting

>>12090126
it does, actually

>>12089626
It's because you where born with it. If you grew your wealth you wouldn't be indulging in drugs and wasteful behavior while still have meaning in your life. I see a difference in my friends who where trust fund babies and those that are just making their wealth now.

>>12088131
>>have lots and lots of "acquaintances" but not a single real friend
so true, my "friends" are only my friends because i have nobody else, they're mostly bitter and full of shit, different from me to too far of a stretch or just can't really help me get further in life through influence.

>>12094764
For an asian that is actually pretty good. Congrats anon

>>12089626
you have to be part of something bigger than yourself.

find some goal to pursue. something that takes an investment of time and effort, not money.

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>>12088131
>turn 27
>been working out for 3 years, finally getting ottermode
>finally be able to grow a decent beard
>hair start thinning out

I
JUST
CANT
WIN

i have been in mental health care for about five years now and i just keep getting worse but lately it does not even bother me that much anymore, becoming numb and kind of gave up idk

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>tfw a social retard

im sure there are worse things, but its basically equivalent to leading maybe 5% the life you would have otherwise had, cutting out all social interaction and meaningful communication

why cant i even make one friend? people barely even tolerate me, im such a social cripple i dont even have awkward stories about it because no one ever wants to interact with me more than once

>>12097339
you in NY?

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>tfw no fa gf/bf

>>12094556
Ive had multiple since I was a kid and I'm still the same
I don't even go out anymore and when I have to I have to talk as little as possible because if I fuck up I'm gonna be embarrassed and cringe at myself for the rest of the week

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>tfw got a really nice vocabulary and rethoric, plus social skills.
>tfw 187cm & 79kg but no muscle mass so i look chubby.

i give up

> tfw officially autistic and it never going away

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>>12088131
>>tfw theres no one to even go out and have fun with so why bother wearing effay stuff
>>tfw no one invites you to anything ever

these are the feels that keep me up at night.

Plus, I don't even know if my friends really like me or even consider me as one. I used to always think about how they perceive me and how they would always talk shit behind my back. It drove me crazy then but I don't care now. I just want someone to hang out with, being alone most of the time is starting to lose it magic

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>tfw haven't fucked in more than a year
>tfw 181cm and ~79kg

>>12088131
That hurt. That was a word for word summary of myself as well as many people in this thread. Get well soon.

Here's one of my favourite things I ever heard watching this crazy show when younger.
https://youtu.be/YgBxd170VV4?t=2s

>Always feels malnourished
>Never eat enough
>Never eat enough iron, vitamins
>Somehow have a lot of energy to function

not as bad but every time I come here like once or twice a week I always tell myself I'm going to stop dressing like shit and look like those people on insta. my hair is decent too but yeah i've just never gotten around to it
when i see actual well dressed people in public i get embarrassed

It's 15 minutes into 2017 and I'm sitting at home alone because I worked so late that all my friends had already left for the New Years parties without me. I just sat through an awful emotional phone call with my girlfriend who's high on ecstasy who I'm slowly falling out of love with and I'm trying really hard to cheat on.

>>12097904
Just lift mayne

>>12098002
Try to be more outgoing man

>>12092558
doesn't swimming just give you big shoulders though?

also, what exercises should I be doing if I want to lose calf muscles but keep da booty

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>>12099336
I don't wanna work out. People who do look cringeworthy and Chad-like.

>>12097339
same, I feel like a fucking robot.

>>12099446
Then don't complain about not having muscle mass, you autist

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>>12088131
I can relate to 90% of this

>>12089626
join the revolutionary communist cause

>>12089626
Depression is much more common among upper-class citizens regardless, friend. You were fucked from the start. I know the feel. You grow up with everything so that sense of ambition is completely gone. There's nothing to chase, and that's the only thing you're supposed to do in life. Try art. A creative outlet is probably your best bet, channel that emptiness, you might just create something brilliant.

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>10/10 girl, for real, /fa/, money, smart and everything
>used to be close for years but too young and awkward for anything really but whatever
>really liked her
>don't see each other for years because too much traveling and schools abroad.
>never texted because you know how hard it is
>went crazy in the interval. went full hobocore at one point, real rich kid sob story affluenza shit.
>cleaned up my act
>met again in the most scenic city you can imagine. complete coincidence
>still perfect
>not enough time here
>if not later this week, it's probably going to be years until we meet again
>nostalgic depression imagining if we had stayed in contact
>trying so hard to remember every word and every sentence and every look when we're together
>i'm going to cry so hard

>>12091306
>although we're both going back to different colleges
i feel this
why why why

>>12099553
text her. This is a moment you're going to regret if you don't anon. Even if it doesn't work out you wont have the regret of never knowing

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>>12099493
I'm not complaining about not having it, I'm complaining about being fat at 79kg.

>>12099568
oh fuck triple feels, trying to get close to actual perfect gal, same interests and ethnicity (lol) but I know we'll be in different colleges so just give up and feel sad when we talk

>>12099553
>>12099595
This anon. Fuck man don't be a pussy and miss out on your shot

>>12089987
school of life has lots of bs on their channel though

>too ugly to pull off my tricky ricky clothes

why do I even bother

>>12099605
Then work out. You can decide how much muscle mass you gain...

>sitting inside on nye, listening to joji
>no matter how well i dress, im still sad

why wont it stop

>>12089626
find god

>>12099553
boi you better follow her to the ends of the earth baka

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>>12099610
>fall in love with a girl senior year of high school
>she has been dating a guy for over a year
>still become really good friends with her
>dumps him summer before college
>at the same time she distances herself from me
>she goes to a different college
>talk on and off during the school year, she distances herself
>eventually get frustrated and sad and just confess how I feel
>no surprise, she doesn't feel the same way
>still talk on and off as friends but things are obviously different
>hit her up again over the break
>she started dating someone else

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>Not invited to a single party
>Spent all fucking day trying to make plans with friends
>Of course it flops but they say its because of family, etc
>Snapchat filled with stories of them at parties downtown
>College (((Friends))) post in the groupchat and seem to have met up over the break but they too never invited me to anything

I dont even have a good reason for killing myself what the fuck

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4chan flips photos randomly when posting from phone so fuck it. Not sad feels really. Months ago i hit a low, i was depressed and dropped out of college. I was also at 320lbs at 6'5 and 18 y/o. Gf and i went on break too. Througj this time, i finally got a job, and it was a little money, but enough. It helped me lose weight and focus more. Gf and i now back together, and im down 40lbs, and while still have atleast 70 to go its progress. Slowly getting into fashion too, as it makes me feel good sbout myself. You cant always change your situation, but you can change yourself, and thats what i did and am still doing. I know im never gonna be a 10/10, but i know that doesnt matter if im happy, and ideally, ill stay with this girl and have forever with her, as she makes me honestly happy.

>>12100862
Unrelated but I'm piggy backing off you

>Find perfect girl
>She likes me
>Her "best friend" realizes she won't be under his thumb forever
>Makes a move
>She takes him over me
>Even though he's emotionally abusive

This has happened too many fucking times.

>Get invited to movies a few weeks ago
>They forget to tell me the time and day we're going
>I've left the house once since being back home for break
>I had more fun with complete strangers than I have with my friends in the past year
>I left early because I always do I don't know why I sabotage myself, I was having fun
>New Years Eve
>Playing games with a friend
>Hear our friends arrive in his background
>"sorry man I gotta go"

And now I'm sitting at my computer listening to Brand New.
At least I have clothes coming in the mail, right /fa/?

My friends from college are so much better than my friends from home. Literally all I do over any sort of break is text my friends from school, watch netflix, shitpost, and play video games. Being home sucks.

>NYE
>alone, at home sitting in the dark eating a fucking peanut butter sandwich
>no one ever invites me to anything

>tfw when you don't want to exist anymore

>>12100912
This is me man. I've just been distancing myself away from my friends this whole year.

I have more fun when I'm around people that barely know me. I try going to party's and stuff, but most of the time my friends are there so I don't go.

This sucks, but soon I will be moving somewhere else and I hope that you find a way to have fun, even if you have to leave your friends. I suggest listening to new music, because personally Brand New reminds me a lot of my friends.

I'm a kissless virgin with no excuse. im tall, not (that) ugly, not balding, but i still cant talk to a girl or anyone for the life of me. every social interaction that i know i have to do like going to the doctor or ordering a sandwich at subway makes me anxious and is the reason why i eat at home more often than not. I spend hundreds on clothes and tons of time looking and learning about clothes but I still dress awful. Like 50% of my days are thinking about suicide but I'm too afraid to ever do it. There's really nothing I wish more than if I was just a normal kid. I know I have no excuse. It's my fault I can't make new friends. It's my fault I can't meet girls let alone get in a relationship. It's my fault that I'm probably not gonna achieve anything in my career. College just feels like the last years I have before I have to fully accept that I won't ever fix myself. I'm considering just cutting off the few friends I have because the majority of the time I just feel like I'm not made to be around people. Why is it so hard to act human

>cute face but 1m70
>depressed

that's pretty much it

>>12089626
Give away some money
I'll drop my pp

>cannot abate my self-disgust
>do 100 mile cycling trips in below-freezing temps
>embarking on a 5 day mountain backpacking trip with temperatures expected to be below 0 F
>cannot stop constructively destroying myself
>know fully-well that I vehemently must avoid alcohol and drugs, because I would be dead within three years if I ever formed even a modicum of addiction

20 and never had a gf :(

>>12101326
almost 23 and never had a gf :( virgin too

>>12093605
I'm well on my way down the same path as you my friend, although I am 23. My isolation has more to do with self-disgust more than a lack of self-esteem, though I have come to accept this as kismet, and have immersed myself in niche hobbies that has removed me of my depression. I cannot even palate pornography unless I am intensely bored. My parents and friends presume I'm gay, and I find it pretty amusing- they cannot understand my disconnection, I'm not sure many people can.

>Circumcised

Sometimes it's not the clothes or the face or even the rest of the body.

But damn this shit sucks

We really need a self-improvement / psychology board. Most of the "feels" posted in this thread aren't even /fa/ related.
I'm dead serious people are just spilling their self-pitying feels everywhere. We need to contain that shit so we can actually have interesting discussions.

>inb4 /r9k/

>improvement
>/r9k/

>tfw I love my gf but I always get super tempted when slags flirt with me
>tfw I know it's never worth it but it's always hard to resist the temptation of cheap bathroom sex with a stranger
I'm still faithful, but I feel bad for having to struggle for this, any of you know this feel ?

>>12101385
outcast feels are effay feels bro

>>12101385
/adv/?

>>12088554
This
Gonna be put on pills soon enough, All my friends get to graduate college next year and I can't even hold a job or go to school because of how fucked I am now. Let's make this year a change for us both...

>>12089261
That's textbook depression my man, if it keeps up go see a doc

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>tfw want to talk to some of you guys, even if it was online through text only.
>too afraid to add people and if i do i just wait around hoping they'll message me
>Even if we do get to talking eventually i'll bore the shit out of the other person and we'll stop talking

Am I really this autistic?

>>12088554
It's annoying, I have pretty severe anxiety and depression and I have no idea how to fix it. It wasn't as big of deal when I was younger but now it's slowly ruining my life. Seeing people glamorize depression is annoying as fuck, there's nothing cool about it, it sucks any fucking motivation out of you.

>>12088131
Stop having videogames/movies/reading/fashion as your only fucking hobbies if you're actually interested in making friends.

>decently attractive
>girls look at me and I look back
>go back and forth with them but never do anything
>I can have conversations just fine with girls I know but it's never anything intimate just good conversation and jokes
>desperately seek compassion but too beta to do anything about it
>don't have any social media
>friends enjoy my company and admire my fits but I never engage in the idea of hanging out with them
>have money but too scared of parents thinking I'm a faggot for spending it on nice clothes so I stick to thrift
>take xanax, lexapro etc but it doesn't help
>help

>tfw thin hair
>tfw idiotic hairline
>tfw designer clothes are outrageously expensive
>tfw fat is mostly concentrated on my stomach

>>12101703
Skinny fat here as well. I have good arms and legs and some stomach fat but I have like fucking small breasts );

>>12101638
whats ur kik

>Started University and it's interesting

>Live alone in an Apartment for the first time, away from family. I spend a bunch of money trying to furnish it with beautiful designer items

>My wardrobe is pretty much "complete", occasionally I sell something on grailed or buy something on sale

>I made cool new friends, I try to maintain contact with my friends I made last year in another city and I occasionally visit my hometown an chill with my original friends

>Sometimes I miss those times when I was 16-18 and think of how close my friends and I used to be. Also my crush back then.

>Nowadays there's a girl who I never really considered to be interested in me (kinda out of my league I figured) that has been wanting my dick for a while.

>I dreamt of a girl in my new group of friends and now I kind of have a crush on her. Feels nice, but I don't think I'll ever have a gf

Life is ok, sometimes good, sometimes sad. But as a whole I think I'm doing well

>>12099446

lmao please don't take this 'Chad' thing this seriously. Working out is obviously great for you and your health, it doesn't matter what dumb stereotypes there are of the people that do it

>>12099553

This is your shot dude, you'll be dead soon. Don't blow it.

>>12097339
i've embraced it anon. delete social media, become a recluse, care less about other people in general, be happier. it worked for me anyway.

>>12090157
It does...but from the same side, it warps everyone's idea. So everyone is battling the idea of what "true" love is, and most only have the evidence from Hollywood. So no matter what, we still are a product of the media—either by succumbing to it, or trying to rebel to it— it defines us.

>>12100892
Keep going buddy.

Also, keep lurking. That fit is alright, but you can do way better.

>>12090126
I mean you have to love yourself before you love someone else, sort of.

>>12090891
i can relate to a lot of what you said
esspecially the friends part
Im a bit younger so my situation might be different but my advice is focus on yourself more. people often say go gym or something but its not really about getting fit. Its more about self improvement. I have always been skinny so instead of going gym i started learning piano and reading more books as well as spending more time on my studies. It made my life more fulfilling. I stopped caring about not having close friends. eventually i did meet some great people that i got close to. However i know how hard it is not having someone to talk to at times. Anyways dont an hero its not worth it. If you are really thinking about it start doing drugs instead whats the worse that could happen

>>12097917
lmao loser you fucked up writing one sentence

what kind of annoys me is that my life seems fine but i am still just depressed as hell. as if i keep searching for something that does not even exist.

>>12088131

Just deleted my entire collection of porn. 15K images and .gifs, somewhere in the double digits of GB.

I don't think my relationship with porn is healthy anymore. I kind of made the decision to delete it in the span of five minutes.

Let's see how this goes.

>>12088131
wow.

>>12102903
jesus christ man your relationship with porn stopped being healthy the minute you downloaded a single image

good on you though masturbation is not effay and i dont think the immediate and unearned gratification that wanking provides can be good for the soul

>>12088131
I only have like 1 real friend i talk to all the time and some people i know but never hang with. Idk why but i never keep friends wish i could but they come and go senpai. that's depressing but you gotta keep looking and trying senpai. try harder.

>>12090982
They dont know you want to be invited,they dont think youre weird you just gotta ask them and get to know them more

tfw even therapy and meds bring no improvement when it comes to my depressed feels whatsoever

>>12089626
For you, find a hobby or other endeavor you can channel primarily your effort/time and also your creative mind. You could make art/sculpture, or make clothing of your own. Get a sewing machine, learn how to use it, and start designing your own pieces.

>>12100751
I literally did/feel the same, including listening to joji lmao

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>>12088768

>this entire post

Holy shit, I don't think I can explain in words how much this post resonates with me at the moment. I cried reading this post anon, you aren't alone. Right now I'm just trying to force myself to do things by myself that I enjoy, but its just so hard to to anything other than sit at my computer and think about how great it'd be if I was out doing what I imagine in my head, and the things I used to enjoy just aren't enjoyable anymore. Everything feels meaningless, everything sucks, and I feel trapped.

>everyone randomly stops talking to me

>literally nobody in the world cares enough about me to try to keep me in their life, at this point i'm convinced i'm garbage or people (i know) are garbage

>plans of going off to a college just got ruined, probably getting my degree at a commuter school if at all

>creative rut the last two months

>plans for getting a car derailed

Don't even know why I'm not miserable instead of just firmly sad

>just got a licence and car and turned 18 earlier this year
>got a job, earning heaps of money, enough to buy the designer labels I've always loved
>literally buying some designer stuff this week to celebrate the new year and treat myself
>reconnected w my best friends from 2015 and we're closer than ever and hang out many times a week
>run a successful Instagram of myself w about 60k followers
>have spent the past few months crafting a beautiful album. The art is nearly done, hundreds of demos recorded and now all the lyrics and whatever are pretty much written and recorded and if I get lucky this year I'm expecting to get signed to a label and release it properly w music videos.
>everything in life is objectively going amazingly
>still feeling incredibly depressed on the regular because of someone who was my best friend who in mid-2016 had a huge falling out w me and I've tried reconnecting with many times cause no one made me happier and we bonded so closely over our loves for music n fashion n other stuff.
>tfw everything is going great but your mind keeps telling you "but imagine if he was here too. Imagine if you were both working on music together and taking effay pics for eachother and driving around late at night in your car and spending time together like you used to?" And is genuinely leaving me feeling broken

I'm pretty sure today was his birthday too. Idk why my mind does this to me. He made me so happy and now none of this feels worth having without him around

>asian
>manlet
>hair thinning at 25
>havent had sex without paying for it
there is literally no reason to live

>>12100885
Ayy me too
I just stopped texting people first to see people actually want to talk to me
No surprise I actually have no friends
I cope by being super rough with tinder whores

>20
>spent the last 6 months driving around fucking 17 yo thots
>3k+ spent on coke and md
>popular in my friend group
>everyone likes me
>still bored with life and nothing is satisfying
about to go fuck some slut in 20 mins and gunna get coked off my ass i hate myself

>>12100885
iknow tf but i just dont care anymore

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>tfw taking the subway
>tfw a group of tall Dutch models get in your wagon
>instant self confidence drop

>everything in my life is going good
>got money, I'm in an honors program now, foot my tuition paid, I look cute, I'm healthy but...
>Bf of two years is still making me cry almost everyday

He disrespects me, fucks with my feelings, doesn't text me, doesn't call me; it fucking hurts. I stick around because of the love I felt at the beginning... I'd find another boyfriend but I'm really fucking awkward so for now I'm just grasping at straws trying to keep us alive

>tfw bunch of "friends" I talk to but never hang out with ever
how do I initiate this
also how do pepe get contacts for drugs and shit :(

Does height actually matter?
I'm a 5'5 guy and I'm okay for the most part but I get super nervous and insecure around taller girls
Is it just confidence and not being ugly girls care about?

>>12104442
Why stay with him?
What's the fucking point?
If you don't need him and aren't in danger why stay with him?
Just break up and be single

>huge thighs compared to rest of my body, blame biking everyday to school and skiing
>Lost 15kg of weight but my face still looks fat af
>at least copped some paint splatter GATs

Tempted to deactivate my facebook, since nobody messages me first anymore/nobody replies anymore.

>>12105257
It matters to many girls, but it's generally not a deal breaker

>>12088771

Same. I generally at least look for convincing fakes, but most people, unless they really look for it, can't tell the difference. And it makes me actually feel good about myself.

Except sneakers. I'm trying to find anything decent, but all the fakes are shit quality, and the real ones are far too expensive.

>>12099595
>>12099621
>>12100859
>>12101913

update on this.
texted, met up, still here in what turns out to be our favorite city
still smart af, pretty af,/fa/ af
talked about all sorts of shit and she's even into isabel marant and margiela and shit
like whoa.

>>12105490
im happy for you anon.
See? if you hadn't tried it out you wouldn't ever know what would happen

>have really awkward proportions and no fashion sense at all
>will never look good ever

why live

>>12104202
aahahaahahahhaha hwhat are you in love with him or something
but to be serious i get what you are talking about
some people can leave a huge impact on your life and its very sad and even heartbreaking when they leave
honestly i think that you should let go
if he doesnt want to reconnect there isnt much you can do about it
the truth is that he might not feel the same way about you as you do about him
i know how hard it could be but i think you should move on and focus on other things in life
maybe all this emotional shit will help you make some great music or something(aint that how it works)

Anyway post insta and music
Why did you fall out with him?

>>12104442
That doesnt sound like a normal relationship
personally i think you should end it
it seems like he doesnt really want to be in the relationship
You need to understand that having a partner is not necessary
just because you are awkward does not mean that you wont find the right guy for you who wont really care about that

no offence but what you are doing right now could easily come off as desperate and it looks like you are only humiliating yourself

>>12105243
lmao through friends

>broke up with my ex girlfriend 6 months ago
>pretty loveless, unhealthy, argued constantly and I was always broke
>started to care less, spent all my money on alcohol and clothing
>met a girl last month and went to a concert with her
>had to go away on holiday for a few weeks
>left a week early so I could spend New Years with her
>stayed with her for the weekend and realised she's literally the female version of myself
>spent all our time watching films, listening to music, going to random places and drinking cheap wine
>never been in love like this before
>too overcome with weird, beautiful feels to actually fuck her

probably fucked it, I hope I get out of this problem soon because I've never felt so happy in my life desu

>>12094382
Don't take yourself too seriously, even people who work speaking/public choke sometimes, the thing you can't let it get through your skin, sometimes people won't even notice/care

As a solid 8, who had ( actually still have ) insecurity issues because middle school, I remind myself this everytime I start freaking out why I sounded like a retarded while speaking to a group of people

>made friends with a girl i've been mutuals with for years
>we start talking often and hit it off
>start getting feelings for her
>too scared to tell her
>she also lives in a different state

i want to kill myself

>>12106128
forgot to mention on tumblr

>>12106027
i think this is actually the start of a healthy relationship

>>12088554
People tend to associate melancholy and nostalgia or feeling off with depression. The former can bring interesting mind states and can actually be beneficial at times; the latter is just soul-crushing.
I'm glad I managed to get through it, and now I have regained enough strength to piece my life back together. Looking back, the last 2 years look like a gaping black hole.
Hang in there, pal.

>>12089626
Material things rarely do bring happiness.
Meditate.

>>12105257
It doesn't matter. You might not be able to get with a lot of women significantly taller than you, it all depends on your personality and status though

>>12101454
then you don't actually love your gf, if you find your true love than temptations such as fucking dirty slags would be censored

seems like no on on this board has a job

>>12090807
>>don't ask 4chans opinions (not just clothes, everything) anymore because all they did is ruined me with their autism

:^]

>>12106846
most people on this board are underage

>>12094764
W2C pants plz

>>12089626
start dating me instead

>>12106257
thanks man

I just hope I can get past this seeming lack of sexual drive. I find her to be incredibly hot, also beautiful. perhaps it's the weird month I've had, I've no idea. it's very embarrassing though

>>12105774
i kinda don't wanna post my Insta on 4chan for if I do make smth of my life lol. You'll hear music this year from me.

Can't remember why we fell out, but I feel endlessly bad about it. Best friend I ever had, and lost it because we got angry and said things we didn't mean.

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>short legs
>kinda fat
>board shoulders
>after three years trying to be fa
>finally give up
>go out with a long floral dress
>"isn't that bad, right? I look ok"
>my mom looks pretty happy cause i'm girly and cute
>all my friends do the same
>meet my bf after more than one week
>"haha did you really give up, right?"
>tfw i didn't say a word to him about giving up
>he makes coments saying that i look like i just came home after a party, that i look tired
>I feel like trash

ALSO

>depressed
>not coming back to college after the holidays because I hate what I'm doing
>feels my almost 4 years relationship dying because his mom hates me

at least i'm a woman and have friends

>>12089626
Enlist in the infantry

>>12088131
I just feel kinda empty on the inside. I hang out with people but if one of them were to die right now I don't think I would care at all. I want a relationship but way more romanticized like in TV and anime but I know it will never happen so I just stay inside and use escapism. Nothing brings happiness or enjoyment it just kinda sucks.

>>12101293
Are you me?

>>12107936
to post in this thread u have to actually own four designer clothes otherwise its not fashion related
fuck off loser

>wide feet, between 4E-6E
>need orthotics for overpronation
>nothing fits me except athletic shoes and my one or two dress shoe choices from Dunham

JUST

>>12110363
lmao loser
can relate 2 much tho

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>tfw want to dress nicely
>literally no money after rent+food+bills+bus pass

I just come here to looks the nice clothes I could buy someday...

>>12104202
post insta

>>12106135
this really doesnt matter. hating tumblr is a meme and the triggered feminist part that it's known for is a small part. as long as you stay away from those retards it acutally is a nice site.

>>12111658
No thanks
not here at least
Not attached to that emo post lol

>>12111801
np.

>>12088131
>have lots of "acquaintances" but not a single real friend

I feel you on this one

>>12088131
>tfw slav
>tfw facial scar
>tfw look like drug addict chainsmoking alcoholic gopnik no matter how i dress
>fa tells me im cool looking
>the only girls that dont avoid me are total whores and had at least 100 dicks in their mounth
>tfw still too autist to at least fuck them cuz muh qt gf fantasies
>living in non slav country makes it worse
s-send help

>>12111217
Stop eating

>shitskin
>10lbs over what id like to be.
>5,4
I just want to be a cutie twink Latino ;.;

>tfw fell in love with a 10/10 guy from tumblr but he lives too far and i don't know if he loves me back
>tfw im trying to push him away so neither one of us gets hurt
>tfw he probably likes someone else because honestly no one could love me

>>12101757
Well....is it worth it to make a kik?

>>12100862
At least you lived a little and felt something. Now you can cry about it like a bitch or man up and move on. Do stuff that make you proud of yourself. Same excact thing happened to me and I feel way better now. Excercise, books, guitar playing, tinder, whatever. Just do stuff that make you confident. Good luck