/efg/ - Erotic Fiction General

>>7365349
I'm relatively new here, so sorry if I'm asking something obvious, but what is the difference between the first two links? Like if I fulfill a request (which was not mentioned in the third pasta), where should I put it to be recorded for all eternity? In the document or in the table?

>>7365357
You should add it to both. The 'recent entries' list is an aid meant for those who don't want to dig through the whole list each time.

>>7364321
DLFG,

Yes, I do have an idea/request, though it's a bit odd for a D&D-inspired setting: having her paired with a hivemind race.
The way I see it, she would be traveling and stopping at a town or trade city. The locals are a peaceful, or neutral-ish race along the lines of the slivers or tyranids, but designed to fit in your setting. Probably with non-warrior forms that are more humanoid in order to facilitate dealing with other races (a carnifex wouldn't be very good as a barmaid, for example).
She comes to make friends with the hivemind and, being curious, decides to give sex a go.
I can imagine a scene in which she gets to choose her partner/partners (that is, the body/bodies the hive will use), styled the way a regular person would try on different sexy clothes. The hive would also be able to fetch anything she mentions, like toys or drinks or food, without having to order it.
Also, I love Ireela and it would be great to see her getting pampered. Then again, her being the one trying to do the pleasing could work too.

And before anyone asks, yes, this idea was partially inspired by Unity from Rick and Morty, though I believe it would be more enjoyable with a hive mind species, rather than regular species being subsumed by a hive mind. But either could work.

>>7365428
Also, sorry for the overly-late reply.

>>7365307

The way it works is snek is free to write as much as he wants, and I pay him $20 per 7k words until he feels he's done

Is this the thread for /d/-themed fantasies where it's too detailed to be a less than 2 sentences story prompt. But too short to be a story itself?

(say 100-200 words)

I have had an idea in my head that is not quite tg enough, not quite bondage enough and not quite mind control enough for any of those specific threads.

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>>7365444
Huh. That rate is less than I thought it'd be.

Well, that brings up something to talk about. Is it polite to talk about rates? If the author and commissioner are both OK, it's probably fine, but might it make other writers feel like they're over/undercharging? Or is it nobody's business? Should I not have even commented on it?

Until I actually got a commission, I never once considered what my rate should be. I sort of just pulled one out of the air based on what other people were talking about. Then again, Snek writes thousands of words a day, and I only pull 1000 a day if I'm really rolling.

(and depsite continuing to look, I can't find a picture of a hung futa on a pile of money. Maybe I need to commission someone to draw that...)

>>7365444
It's business between you and your eventual client, what he's willing to pay for what he wants vs. what you're willing to work for.

>Should I not have even commented on it?

No, you shouldn't have. This kinds of 'discussions' only end up derailing the thread.

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>>7365564
I think each person's time has a different value, my time is fairly low value and so I charge a little less than most writers I've seen.
If you're very busy and you work long hours, then I can see you charging more for less, that's time you could be spending doing other things and you deserve to be properly compensated for that.
I also write very quickly, so again less time spent overall.

It varies though, I've charged a lot more and I've charged less depending on what content the commissioner wants, how long its going to take me (and how long its going to stall other projects). Ultimately it's something you negotiate with each individual, and come to an arrangement that suits you both.

Shiny is kind of a special case, because he's very laissez-faire with his content and as long as I follow the intent of the outline he writes up for me I'm free to do as I like. I can hardly consider it work compared to some extreme outlandish fetish fapfic, but I tend not to take those anyway.

tl;dr it depends on how much you value your own time and what your client considers fair.

>>7365564
I usually charge $100 for 5k words, but I do extreme fetish shit usually involving established settings.

I also carried over some of my clients from my fur art days.

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2000 word update, new content at "He shuffled over to the other side of the cave"

Or Die Alone:
https://pastebin.com/WYh3N6HP
>no tags yet

>>7365994

It's been a long time since a commission has made me lol, good shit

>>7365762
Unless you're planning to write a fic about your commission prices, save it for the emails with the people who actually want to commission you. In here it just sounds like you're trying to shill yourself.

>>7365994
hm, don't see the update

>>7365381
Try and use our wiki too, it needs updates real badly.

https://fourleaffics.miraheze.org/wiki/Main_Page

>>7366284
Sorry, try it now.

What would qualify as "kinky sex" in the Shadowrun setting?

Give me ideas.

>>7366571
Hmm... BTLs that make the user feel tickled? A toxic shaman makes a radioactive jizz spirit? The wide wide world of cyber-dong enhancement that resemble jackhammers? Trapping someone in an endless orgy in the virtual world? A woman with eight cyberarms wins a handjob competition and she's the only contestant?

If you want to get into noncon... maybe an otaku hacking a woman's cyberware and forcing her to slut it up?

Oh, Shadowrun.

>>7366571

Finding love and communing via astral proyection with them both being at their most intimate and vulnerable selves, embracing each other's true form and consumating their union with passionate, loving sex.

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How can I learn to have ideas?

>>7366699
Cyanide

>>7366699

Read good stories and think about how they would go if you could change things

>>7366699
You can start by not trying to fish for pity.

>>7366699
I was going to suggest suicide but that's already been suggested so here's some other tips
>read everything. including nonfiction, biographies, even history textbooks. real life is amusing and a huge wellspring for ideas
>get into ttrpgs or failing that lurk the tg board or listen/read about people's games and experiences and either build on ideas from them or steal ideas themes and whatever else strikes your fancy
>look at all of the requests in this thread or just story requests in general and take those desperate calls for smut and shape them into something new or laugh at how sad they are
>play some vidya games, look at the attempts at stories or encounters and try elaborating on them or take the theme and try to apply it to a diffrent set up

There's a lot of ways to generate ideas. Anyone can be an idea man with almost no effort, but it takes ACTION to make anything of them.

>>7366252
>In here it just sounds like you're trying to shill yourself.

No it sounds like I'm chiming into a chain regarding commissions and prices.

>>7366699
Expand your metal library, read more, experience more, begin by ripping off someone elses shit and then go from there.

I'm trying to get into writing, well essentially plotless smut but I usually hit a wall relatively quickly because I can't flesh it out properly. If I were to dump it on a pastebin, would anyone point out flaws/suggestions?

>>7366593
I'm sad you didn't mention the extremely illicit and lewd world of dragon pornography.

>>7367336
Sure, go ahead.

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>>7366699
Write what you know.
What movies do you like? What books or comics/manga do you read? What are your favorite TV shows and games?
You might find that you're a secret expert in the field of sci-fi, fantasy, crime, etc.
Try to reproduce the genres that you enjoy, and then add a smut twist to them. It's ok to copy or write fanfiction if you need to.

Is your favorite book Little Women? Write a period piece about lesbians.

Do you enjoy romance movies? Try writing the payoff that we all imagine but we never get on-screen.

Do you like Ghost in the Shell, Shadowrun or Deus Ex? Write a crazy psycho-sexual crime thriller involving mindrape hackers.

Are you enamored with a particular character? Write a story about them.

>>7367324
>Expand your metal library
This is good advice, I recommend Motörhead or Sabaton.

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Hey Nier guy. How far are you? What do you think of the game so far?

Anyone here like 40k? There needs to be more sobxguardsmen smut. The Times and Trials of Klightus was the shit but it didn't have anything lewd.

>>7367701
Are you offering to write or making a request?

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>>7367669
I'm here.

I've actually started to structure the short story, even wrote the beginning, but in the mean time I got to the B ending and now I think I'll change some things. Really, playing this game drains me. I haven't had such a good time with a JRPG since Chrono Trigger. I sat down around 10-11 in the morning to start the second play trough, and got it done just now. Now I don't know how long it would take to get to the C and D parts, but work is calling, so that has to wait. I had the Easter break very well spend, at least.

I hope I won't let you down. In terms of detail and story telling style it'll be something like the Kaine one I posted in the previous thread, but now that I'm not in the dark I plan to give them more characteristics and thought, and leave opportunities to continue for other scenarios. However so far I don't see how could 9S man up, so I'm leaning towards role reversal ideas. Maybe this will change when I finish the game the 4th time, however I think it would be better if this would happen before the game or before any of the endings, so any character development happening from now on will likely be ignored. I hope you wouldn't mind this. Or you want the actual 9S getting 2B thing and not just a smut with the characters?

If I may have a question regarding the role, I would be really grateful: do androids see? They clearly have a functioning eye, and they always turn their heads in the direction where the action/monitor is, but then what's the blindfold for? I'm thinking if idioms like "she looked up" or "she took a quick glance" have any meaning in this case or not.

>>7367833
Not the requester, but they're fine. You can replace them with something akin to "she turned her sensors toward the percieved disturbance" if you really want to enhance the non-human aspect, but that's not mandatory.

>>7367833
The blindfold is a sensor/camera thing. Think Raiden's eyepatch band from Rising. Probably still needs to be facing towards a thing to look at it.

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sup anons
lately i've been really in the mood to write some big butt/ass expansion stuff but have almost too many ideas to settle on. if anyone has any requests involving those kinks, the more gratuitous the better, now's the time. i'm more than open to including other fetishes too as long as it's not bathroom stuff, preg or hard guro, and i'll be around pretty much all day today so i'll try to get to as many as i can

>>7367841
>>7367844
Thanks for the help!

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>>7367864
Big assed huh. Does it have to involve ass expansion?

If not I'll throw one at you:. Requesting haughty bitch Belchandra (eidolon) from Aura Kingdom being separated from her powerful, detachable arms by her male human envoy/contractor so that he can spank her fat blue ass for being an annoying, unhelpful cunt during battle (taunting/bothering him, not fighting the opponent, causing trouble, the works). He then fucks her in the ass to fully shove the lesson inside her, balls deep.

If you need an outline:

Guy fights monsters with sword or gunfire
Belchandra does little help if at all during fight, preferring to laze around and chastise him for sloppy fight techniques n shit.
He comes up with a plan to separate her from her joy and pride: arms.
He does so, and outs the struggling lady onto his lap to spank her juicy blue jiggling ass red (or purple, whichever one works)
She swears and rants throughout the spanking while he simply enjoys the feeling of dominance and her blue ass.
He gets friskier as it goes on, fingering her asshole to her shock.
She bargains mercy, but he rejects and fucks her ass as punishment.
Throughout ass fuck he gropes and spanks her blue booty until he cums inside.

This is what I have in mind, but feel free to modify outline to your preference. I prefer contractor to be male though.

>>7367916
Oh, forgot her bio from the game if it helps:
Bel-Chandrais proficient in all of the world of dance. Whether happy or sad at the time, she always makes everyone engrossed in her wonderful dancing. Known throughoutpandemoniumas the Empress of Torment, Bel-Chandra harnesses fearful magic that wracks the bodies of her enemies in terrible agony. Drawn to the hidden darkness in mortals' hearts, she whispers emboldening words, encouraging mercilessness in battle.

Also let me know if you have any questions about her or the story.

>>7367785
The latter.

>>7367833
I'm actually enjoying hearing what you think about the game. No matter how the story turns out I'm having a good time reading what you've said so far. :)

>>7367864

lets go with the classic curse of "It grows bigger the longer someone stares at it"

>>7367833
And keep playing. There is more to 9S's character. Also when you're done there is a story detail that I'll be able to tell you which will allow you to do crazy things that didn't happen in the game and still have them fit into the timeline.

>>7367833
>what's the blindfold for
The blindfolds are heads up displays. Basically combat visors.

You know what this world needs more of? Cock transformation.

That's why I sat down and wrote a short CTF story, with room for continuation. Please take a look. Especially if you like CTF stuff. If you don't, it might be a bit extreme

https://pastebin.com/tHk7BBaT - 2042 words.

Please criticize my writing. I'd appreciate it greatly.

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2500 word update, new content at “Let's just get moving while we still have sunlight"

Or Die Alone:
https://pastebin.com/WYh3N6HP
>no tags yet

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>>7368081
>Making me think this was nier smut when it wasn't.

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>>7368087
2B ASMR is vaguely relevant.

Wiki has dropped of the OP.

>>7367916
doesn't have to involve expansion yeah, should've mentioned that. this looks definitely doable though i'm not 100% sure i'll be able to get through that entire plotline in one night. i might end up condensing it slightly or splitting it up into a few smaller pieces if that's cool with you, but i like the idea so it'll happen one way or another.

>>7367968
i fucking love this concept already. any specific characters/scenarios beyond the basic idea you'd want to see?

>>7367916
whoops, forgot to ask: perspective preference? first, second, third with a generic standin character?

>>7368203
Hmm...Let's go first person.
>>7368157
I don't mind if you condense the early parts or split it up to random pieces, as long as that blue ass is punished and fucked. Thanks for taking my request.

>>7368157

Clothing discomfort as it slowly grows bigger is a 10/10.

Getting used to her new center of mass and jiggling weight too.

Making it a stronger erogenous zone would be a nice cherry on top.

>>7368262
all of this is eminently my shit and i'll be sure to include it when i get to your request. Any specific appearance or canon character, or should I just improvise?

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Not sure if this is someone people like to write around here, but I have a massive kink in full body suits being filled to the sloshing point with cum, with the wearer being forced or choosing to walk around in basically a mobile aquarium. Bonus points if its constantly being topped off, or if the only way to fill the suit is through a mouth hole.

If you'd like a short premise, maybe there's a queen in a fantasy (or sci-fi, that'd be cool too. Side-note, I only just realised exactly why I like Quarians from ME so much) world who's obsessed her beauty, even going so far as to use semen as a moisturiser on the council of her aide. Small applications aren't enough for her, and bathing in it takes up too much of her time, so she had a nearly-skintight suit specially made. She keeps a small stable of virile men to constantly keep her suit full, maybe even going out and finding particularly productive specimens from other races to keep up with her demand.

>>7368282

Character goes to the mall and begins growing. Gets inside a changing room, confirms the damage. Quick dash to her car only draws more attention to her assets. (Maybe she trips). Ride home in an old car prone to vibrating a lot with a her huge plushy cheeks squeezed beneath her.

An OC is fine.

>>7368262
>>7368282
Different anon with the same fetish, but what if the sensitivity increase is directly tied to size?
Like she gets home and starts anally masturbating because it feels so good, but it starts shrinking because she isn't looking at it and gets less sensitive, so she ends up using a mirror to stare at her steadily growing ass as she fingerfucks/dildos herself silly?

Oh yeah. I was looking through my erotic writing folder, and... I forgot, there was a thread a while back where someone wanted a "public use" story that I sort of contorted to involve futa and made it entirely unambiguously consensual.

...if I finished that, would that interest anyone? I haven't come up with a terrible pun title yet.

>>7368392
No pun, no deal.

>>7368392
I'm the original requester and I'd be very interested in seeing it
>entirely unambiguously consensual.
Is exactly what I wanted in the first place, so this sounds great

>>7368442
>I'm the original requester and I'd be very interested in seeing it
>>entirely unambiguously consensual.
>Is exactly what I wanted in the first place, so this sounds great

OK. Between the commission and trying to get PWA7 out, I can't promise anything. But I will try to give it some time.

Any good new Shemale on Male story?

It seems that on all the other sites it has became very rare to stumble upon that fetish in story form

Anasheya briefly revived the trend (before disappearing ;_;)

>>7368392
>entirely unambiguously consensual public use
>futa
Hell yeah I'd read that as long as there's no degradation or humiliation involved

>>7368310
>>7368356
i like both of these ideas and will probably make them into a part 1 and part 2 respectively.

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Requesting a story about a cute potboy. I've been going through the pot people thread here >>7348706 and it's made me crave something written on the subject.

>>7368485
Degradation, no. Humiliation...

Well, my humiliation stuff is always kind of soft and cheeky. Like in PWA2, when the guy walks in on Katrina jacking off. Stuff like that. Not "I need to change schools" or "I can't face my coworkers, I need them to mail me my stuff rather than come in and retrieve it when I quit" stuff.

Not sure if it'll be in this one, because it's in the context of a club, where everyone is there to fuck the public use volunteers, and the PUVs are there to be fucked by everyone in the club. So... what's to be embarrassed about? It'd be like being embarrassed about wearing bowling shoes at a bowling alley.

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>>7368500

>>7368513
>Not sure if it'll be in this one, because it's in the context of a club, where everyone is there to fuck the public use volunteers, and the PUVs are there to be fucked by everyone in the club. So... what's to be embarrassed about? It'd be like being embarrassed about wearing bowling shoes at a bowling alley.
I didn't know the context of the request, but that's good to know
"Volunteers" sounds a bit weird for the context, though. Enthusiasts or Fetishists would probably be better

>>7368525
>"Volunteers" sounds a bit weird for the context, though. Enthusiasts or Fetishists would probably be better

They won't be called that in the story. I just needed a word for it, and didn't want to use 'fucker' and 'fuckee.'

>>7368392
>>7368513
Idea I'd you're into it, what about one of the futas involved decides to 'clean' the girl up with her tongue (vaginally or anally) before the takes her turn?

>>7367916
brief update: part I of this is going really well and should be finished and posted by either tonight or tomorrow. I'm surprised by how much fun I'm having writing a character I knew almost nothing about beforehand, but 'arrogant, teasing, fat-assed companion spirit' is a great concept

>>7367916

part I is finished! let me know what you think and if there's anything you want me to revise

https://pastebin.com/XtGin19A

preliminary tags (no actual smut yet, just some fantasizing and teasing):

>voyeurism, ass/thigh focus, first-person, large amounts of bitchiness

i'm probably going to do >>7368310 next, and then finish up the above story with part II. if anyone has more big-butt requests, feel free to shoot them my way and i'll happily get to them after those two

thanks anons, it's great to be writing stuff again

Snekguy your new story with the special agent is a bit wierd. He comes off as professional before the crash. And then after the crash he is constantly insulting his only ally, makes little effort to manage the supplies and wastes power and energy fucking around by not getting in the sleeping bag.

>>7369024
holy shit this is fantastic, like, perfect set up. I'm super hype for part II now, great work anon

>>7369024
OR. This is actually pretty damn good what you got so far. You captured her annoying personality and the triggered MC very well, and the buildup for part 2 is very inticing. Will look forward to it!

>>7369029
Conserving body heat is for chumps. Alternatively, his brain is sloshing in his skull like a bowl of oatmeal and he's going to die by himself within 48 hours. 72 tops.

>>7369024
This already looks very nice indeed. Good job, anon.

>>7369029
It's in the formula. If the human isn't a total doormat blob of jello masquerading as a human, they must be an antagonistic jackass who continually fucks themself over by not accepting the superiority of their catgirl overlords

>>7367981
>tfw nobody criticizes your writing
How am I supposed to improve?

I continued writing regardless.

https://pastebin.com/b5bRqqWU - 1562 words

Tags: Body swap (maybe?), sentient cock, self-fucking, wormhole (sorta?)

>>7369466
plz don't think I put that name there on purpose.

>>7369466
Probably because no one's interested in reading it.

>>7369474
>tfw you're not snekguy

>>7369480
I don't even read Snek's works. All I know is that if a story contains the tags "sentient cock" and "wormhole", I can already tell I wouldn't be engrossed in the literature.

>>7369485
Yep, it's a textbook issue when you're writing about fetishes, especially the weirder ones. Even on /d/ there's no guarantee anyone will have tastes similar enough to your own to make them interested in your writing, and it's difficult to get critique without the added hurdle of uncommon fetishes. Just gotta tough it out and keep asking- someone's bound to review it eventually.

Where are all the shota/loli writers posting their stuff these days?

Anyone know where I can find a good forced feminization story from the point of view of the person doing the feminizing?

Everything I find is "I don't want to suck his dick but it looks so fun" and that's not my thing.

>>7369029
Well his cover got blown, he's had three near-death experiences in as many hours, and now he's probably going to freeze/starve. I don't think his professionalism slipping or him blowing off steam is unusual.

>>7369496
It's illegal, apparently. Had my post asking the same removed.

>>7369492
Well shit. I don't wanna spam the threads either though.

>>7369029
He's under extreme stress and making a lot of stupid decisions, as is Lorza. The both of them will get their act together soon enough.

>>7369431
That's not apart of his formula, it's my commission. Snek's gone a little too light on the things Lorza is doing wrong/reasons to dislike her, but rest assured that'll be corrected soon.

>>7369527

On top of all that, he's well aware their destination could just as easily be staffed by syndicate members or simply be monitored by them, knowing he'll show up eventually if he survived. The chance that he isn't a dead man walking is extremely slim, and the pressure is getting him to crack. Cynicism and criticism is just his mental defense against it so that he doesn't have a nervous breakdown.

Again guys, don't worry too hard, we have a long way to go and plenty in store for the both of them.

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>>7368087
Sorry, anon, I've only managed to write ~600 words in my spare time today. Hopefully I'll finish it on the weekend, but no promises.

>>7369952
No! You take your time! You play that game and only then do you write. Enjoy it too damn you! >:(

Hey broodlord, how's the wolves going?

>>7368081
>>7369683
1000 word update, was a little busier today.

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>>7369466
>>7369541

Alright, I'll read this.

(reads)

OK, definitely not my kink. Obviously, I like futa, and I can get into transformation (I've done TWO stories about catgirls!). But cock transformation is a bridge too far.

Maybe it starts too abruptly. Someone is wishing for something, and they wish to not be a magically enslaved cock thing? There's no context for what's going on, and maybe what is essentially a slave/master reversal story can't start with that reversal.

One question I have, in a purely grammatical sense. Why don't you indent after each paragraph when the sentence doesn't begin with dialogue?

>>7369952
>>7369995
Yo, nierguy
I've got an idea, if you and the OR are both interested;
Sensitivity Play. They're androids, right? So maybe among other settings they can adjust the sensitivity of various eroginous zones up or down, and two androids doing it together could come up with some pretty interesting combinations

>>7369024
Do you have any interest in what I guess could be called softcore ass expansion?
Like say a petite women going from a size S to L or XL ass?
If so I've got a request

>>7370377
100% interested. as long as the end result is substantially larger than average i'm definitely into it

>>7368096
>2B ASMR is vaguely relevant.
oh man. got a link, brother?

>>7370387
OK, here's the short pitch
>smol girl (like 5ft 2, 100lbs soaking wet) is annoyed about her tiny butt
>decides she wants to try anal with her boyfriend because hey, that's at least something her tiny ass is still good at
>afterwards she notices a small but measurable increase in it and her hips' size and anal sensitivity
>this rapidly sets off a frenzy of ass eating and fucking with her BF as it gets bigger and bigger and she has more and more orgasms
>at the end they're both totally worn out and she's got an ass that would look big on a girl four inches taller and fifty pounds heavier
I guess the idea is that it stops growing there because she's finally happy with it
So not really THAT much bigger than normal overall, but pretty damn huge on her. Is that still of interest to you?

>>7370387
>>7370405
And something I just thought of
>the girl normally dresses very tomboyish, and gets mildly annoyed at the end because she's gonna have to switch to skirts and yoga pants to accommodate her newly enlarged ass, but doesn't REALLY mind

>>7365564
TRAPS ARE GAAAAAAAY!

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>>7370412
>the girl normally dresses very tomboyish, and gets mildly annoyed at the end because she's gonna have to switch to skirts and yoga pants to accommodate her newly enlarged ass, but doesn't REALLY mind

all right well now i'm 200% interested. that being said i wouldnt want to go accidentally overboard with the expansion stuff—is there an image or something you could link that would be a good reference for the type of size/build you're imagining her ending up with?

>>7370442
I guess yeah, about that image's amount of ass, but on a shorter and skinnier girl
Or, to go 3D, MILF pornstar ass on a girl from XXXtra small like
Like the kinda ass and hips to body ratio that leads to triple takes, not wondering if that's even possible, you know?

>>7370464
perfect. i'd be more than happy to do something like that.

>>7370485
Amazing, thanks

anyone up to writing a psyker on sororitas action?

Preferably a sanctioned psyker using his warp talents to arouse a sister of battle.

>>7370418
I'll never understood why people care about that. Is it because I'm aiming for wizardhood? It just seems so thoroughly inconsequential.

>>7369029
It's pretty bad.
The man is apperently part of the chosen that won't break under torture or give any information, something the supersecret Not!spacemafia bossman states before he tries to off him. However flash some fuzzy ass or press some megamilk containers against him and he turns into a sputtering harem protagonist who suddenly can't think.

I understand that the multiple close calls with death would have affected his ability to make judgement calls (like not telling her about the food pill things while she "starves") but his interactions with the cat are odd and childlike. To me the obsession with her weight, and the flusteredness with physical contact don't quiet jive with his established investigator
persona.

Not much to say about the cat she's pretty typical borealen, she's apperently able to deal with the psychological trauma of a near death experience better than a trained agent and able to shrug off the death of companions, able to flirt and fluster male protagonist regardless of his background and current environ. Able to do things with minimum consequences, current example, she ate all the food first shot, tho currently suffers from hunger pains but.... it's all excusable cause she NEEDS all the food as Borealian biology is able to justify all cat actions.

I swear to whatever you hold holy Snekguy (probably snake gurls and/or chicks with abs) if the polar is revealed to actually be a spy(UN or russian) at the end with the same mission as the MC and she completes his mission for him I'll be moderately upset.

>>7370848

I agree with all your main points, Boyd was intended to be much more calm and collected(and not overly reliant on fat jokes) and immune to Lorza's bullshit, and Lorza is indeed taking things way too well for how critical of a situation she's in. Her flirting was never intended by me(I specifically requested snek to save any flirting for the last 2 phases), though there are going to be consequences to her careless food management soon enough(she really is starving and her body is going into atrophy, it's just not shown too well yet) At the very least, she's definitely not a spy or anything like that, she is who she claimed to be.

Ive already brought those points up with snek through previous comments, and he's working on it. A bunch of those would have never happened if I gave snek more details about their interactions and behavior, but I was worried that I might be limiting his freedom too much and just stuck with general descriptions. Such is the life with commissions, the writer can't read your mind and you can't tell him everything. Luckily though, snek is very easy to work with and always willing to correct and edit, so hopefully I can push things a little closer to my original intentions.

Do check back on earlier texts when he posts new updates by the way. Snek makes changes based on my corrections and suggestions every update, but they're always 1 step behind the latest update as he posts it alongside my changes to the previous one

>>7370925
They do farm, it was brought up in a past story, and their planet has much larger fauna then Earth does. Also, they seem to have much smaller global population due to their societies needing to be centered around the land of bodies of water. They're also trading with humans which allows for more resources too. Though, polars should be able to handle longer periods without food due the larger fat reserves/blubber that arctic species naturally have.

>>7370931

Normally this is the case, but for Lorza, the ice moon is so extremely cold that it's forcing her metabolism into overdrive to stay warm and rapidly burning through the fat that she isn't replenishing

>>7370151
>Why don't you indent after each paragraph when the sentence doesn't begin with dialogue?
I don't know, frankly. The way I format my paragraphs have changed a lot over time. Currently I always do a new line when a new character speaks, and every new line that starts with dialogue is indented. Those are the only indents I use. I honestly have no idea why, but it's been on my mind, as I have no idea what the norm is.

>>7365357

Soooo this is my first time posting anything online; I've been kind of messing around with writing a femdom flavored magical smut. A haughty apprentice lensgrinder is scooped up by a powerful empress/sorceress to assist in crafting an arcane object. He then proceeds to stumble around her Babylonian-esque court getting fucked by everyone and everything being the helpless non-magical pleb he is. This particular portion involves him attempting to steal a potion from an ambassador staying at the place, which includes:

#Monstergirl
#Hypnosis/Drugging
#Light restraint

Hope it is a fun read if nothing else.


https://pastebin.com/e7yNjgb2

>>7370766
It's been done before, check the list.

>>7370982
That makes sense, with the increased fuel consumption. She's like a stove that burns too hot and constantly needs more wood.

Why did my comment get deleted?

>>7370848
>>7370897
If you have any suggestions for giving her more flaws or negatives, I'm all ears. I'm having a hard time finding stuff that doesn't make her just unappealing and unattractive to the reader, which I want to avoid for obvious reasons.
With an Equatorial I can just make them 80s highschool bullies, but I can't do that with Polars.
I can't maker her too flirty too quickly either, I need to find a way to make her manipulative without any overt sexual elements.

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>>7370418
Well, I suppose most males who dress up to 'trap' men into having sex with them might qualify as gay, unless of course, they are banging or being banged by a futa, which would make them as straight as can be.

>>7371345
Could you please stop with the shitposting and the baiting? You're getting obnoxious.

>>7370848
>However flash some fuzzy ass or press some megamilk containers against him and he turns into a sputtering harem protagonist who suddenly can't think.
>but his interactions with the cat are odd and childlike. To me the obsession with her weight, and the flusteredness with physical contact don't quiet jive with his established investigator persona.
Shit Leopard can't change it's spots, bubs.
It's not like he knows or wants to know how to write anything else

>>7371310
>I'm having a hard time finding stuff that doesn't make her just unappealing and unattractive to the reader, which I want to avoid for obvious reasons
>I need to find a way to make her manipulative without any overt sexual elements.
Has it ever occurred to you that being a conscienceless manipulative son of a bitch makes you hopelessly unlikeable to the vast majority of humanity, and you kind of have to choose one or the other?

>>7370897
>>7371310
You know snek, it wouldn't hurt for once ever to have borlean wiles fail to effect a human and they have to try and get through on honesty they didn't know they had
Hell, he's an exceptionally well trained operator in a universe where polar borleans' nature is well known
You really think he wouldn't know about any plays she tries and be exceptionally hostile to them?
Hell, that'd be a good way to make him hate her without her doing anything the audience would consider bad. She just does what polars do and tries to play him, and he reacts, badly, as humans would

>>7371441
Now that's a good angle that I hadn't considered, but why would he crack later after resisting her for so long? Surely people would voice the same complaint if he didn't maintain that attitude from start to finish?

>>7371461
>why would he crack later after resisting her for so long?
Became she's not playing any game anymore, not fronting, she's cracked and is showing her true self and he finds that true self one that he actually cares for, though he hated the fronts she put up before
I suppose it would help I'd she was one of the slightly misfit sort who doesn't actually LIKE traditional polar society much, but that's what she falls back on in a panic even though part of her tells her it's bad and stupid

>>7371461
>>7371495

This was actually my intention for how they develop along the story. After all the bullshit gets stripped away, and both of them can see the flaws and positives in each other, I wanted them to see each other for who they really were and that be the reason they fall for each other. The extreme situation forces them to give up putting their up fronts and just expose themselves to each other out of necessity to survive, and the chemistry builds from there.

That and the primary reason Lorza's manipulation doesn't work on Boyd is because he is a spy and highly trained in manipulation tactics, and easily picks up on what she tries to pull on him. Again, this is all stuff I failed to communicate to snek, and so this is my fault and not his. Lesson learned for next time.

>>7371495
>>7371523
No worries I can get that in with minimal edits, starting right now.

>>7371441
>/RR/ enthusiast suggests reducing the femdom in something
Never thought I'd live to see the day

>>7371524

And that's why my business goes to you first, mon frere.

>>7371527
That is actually the underlying premise to my commission!

>>7371527
Technically speaking, I'm not actually into role reversal inasmuch as human/nonhuman relationships that are expected to be sub/Dom actually being loving and equal, with a subset of the couple faking sex like they're expected to be having but really don't, for some reason or another
Hilarious enough, this story of shiny's accidentally preempted a bunch of ideas from a story I originally planned to pitch to snek but haven't yet for a couple of reasons, though there's no way he could have known

>>7371345
D., I just want to say, your taste in picture is ranges from acceptable, to absolute bottom of the barrel garbage. Even on /d/, which god knows is a shit place to find good art, you somehow manage to consistently output things that make me shudder thinking this technically has the tags I like looking up.

>>7371539
Why do you bother commissioning snek when you have to fight him every step of the way to get anything other than the standard trademark story?
It seems like the time and money would be better spent on more flexible artists.

>>7371643
I'd rather pay somebody who I have to whip into shape to write what I'd like but I know actually delivers it over scouring the net for a bunch of flaky faggots who don't actually do shit
And I'd bet money shiny's the same way

>>7371643

Snek is very flexible, the only reason things didn't come out the way I wanted was because I withheld too much information from him and he had no idea about the finer points that I wanted to hit. Snek doesn't even hesitate when I ask him for corrections or changes, and that's a big reason I commission him(along with his speed of course). He's very capable of things that aren't his standard fare, but you have to not be a retard like me and forget to specify it.

>>7371679
That's a bet you'd win. Responsive and fast writers are a rare commodity.

>>7371643
Well he actually does the work, which is a fucking miracle if you've ever tried to commission anything.

>>7371690
2500 word update, along with some edits that should bring it more in-line with what you want. Addressed more of your comments too if you want to go through those.
I'll probably add more little changes as I re-read it just to iron out any suggestive lines I missed on the first pass, but it should be mostly fixed now.

New content at “At least I don't wash myself with my tongue,”

Or Die Alone:
https://pastebin.com/WYh3N6HP
>no tags yet

>>7371757
Definitely this story needs the two of them trading savagely racist insults all the time

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>>7371351
>Could you please stop with the shitposting and the baiting? You're getting obnoxious.

Oh, but I so seldom get to indulge. I don't even remember the last time I shitposted. But alright. I had my fun.

>>7371616
>Even on /d/, which god knows is a shit place to find good art, you somehow manage to consistently output things that make me shudder thinking this technically has the tags I like looking up.

Wah hah hah hah...

To be honest, I've got very little art that's suitable for posting here. A lot of it is Western, some of it is not the right fetish... and that's to say nothing of all the pictures of real women on my hard drive...

I need to expand my library for posting stuff. I've got tons of pictures of witches for PWA posts. I need to do that with general futa pics and such.

>>7371690
You aren't retarded it's that snek will default to Super Sub or Super Dom for literally every character unless heavily and explicitly reminded every step of the way even if the story premise is to not do that.

Because when you make categorizing every living thing into extreme BDSM roles and insist that all social or romantic interaction (fiction or otherwise) must have a "winner" and "loser", then you trap yourself in an insane world that does not even touch reality and is an uncomfortable fictional world for most people.

>>7371757
Hey snek, by your personal catigories of personality types what do you consider Shiny, Dom or Sub? Do yo try and "win" every conversation with them?

>>7371690
Hey shiny, there is rather a lot of gay polar stuff on the agenda for short story month, and as the original commissioner of outpost, is there any extra gay or even straight stuff you'd like to add?

>>7369024
Are you still taking requests or are you focusing on those 3 stuff?

>>7371942
He's a sub, for sure. Just look at how quick he is to kiss Snek's ass at every possible opportunity.

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>>7372024
still taking them! Gonna be a bit slow for the next day or two because I have an exam coming up, but I'm still more than happy to add yours to the queue.

>>7371942

Snek is the worst dom ever, he keeps on politely carrying out my requests all day.

>>7371961
My unspoken direction for Runt was that he had assumed that Schaeffer was in just as bad of a situation as him, and so when Schaeffer helped Runt the way he did, Runt loved it so much that he wanted nothing more than for Schaeffer to experience the mind-blowing pleasure himself. So naturally, Runt starts dragging Schaeffer around to every pack member who wanted a taste of either of them, with Schaeffer not having the heart to say no because he knows Runt really cares about him and just wants to make him happy in the best way he knows how.(And he later admits to himself that all the wild experimentation and mutual pleasure is actually really fun)

Of course, the both of them are shy and inexperienced as fuck, so everything they wind up trying ends up blowing up in their face somehow. The tl;dr is that Runt and Schaeffer party up and go on an epic quest to prove to the pack that they too can be a force to be reckoned with in bed, sexy hilarity ensues.

Examples:

-They attempt to double team Zagza, but 5 minutes later and he's got them both writhing in orgasms on the floor using a single hand for each of them

-Attempt to double team Osha, Schaeffer falls asleep on one of Osha's breasts several minutes in(Runt didn't understand that a tiny human doesn't have as much stamina as he does especially when said human hasn't slept in a day) and Osha accidentally chokes Runt into unconsciousness when she was enjoying his face between her legs a bit too much and not thinking about it

-Attempt to double team Scarface, but she just wraps her huge tail around an ankle from each of them, picks them both up with her tail alone so that they're upside down and facing/pressed against each other, then faps them both at the same time and makes them cum all over each other.


You can't fault them for trying, at least.

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>>7372103
god damnit that wasn't the tenyruu i wanted to post, this is a porn thread after all. here we go

>>7371757
Well, since man-love thursday apparently falls on a wednesday this week, I might as well throw in my Gay Outpost Adventures idea
>Schaffer blowing runt while osha blows zagza beside him, almost like a competition but not really
>superior human mouth finishes runt first, so Schaffer snowballs Osha a bit and then helps her finish zagza, all over them both
>runt and zagza go down on their respective mates while they lick each other clean

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>>7372103
Ah exams. Such a bitch.
How about some workplace harrassment with a big assed Chatalie from an anon, going out throughout the day? Starts with verbal flirting but throughout the day gets raunchier with him slapping and grabbing that big black rear, lifting her skirt for full on groping when she's distracted on phone, and then tonguing her asshole and fucking her when he pulls her into a long elevator ride. If you can think of more lewded butt stuff go ahead, but I like embarrassment

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I'm probably not going to write this, since I've already got a futa cock growth series, but...

What about a dryad who is cursed with a cock that grows every time she lies? It'd be like Pinocchio, but without all that 'make me a real boy' shite and more fucking random fantasy creatures!

I think I need sleep.

>>7372344
i usually have no interest in futa, let alone cock growth, but that idea actually really fucking hot for some reason. take from that what you will i guess

>>7367669
Hey. I found some Nier smut. Good stuff. Might help hold you over until our writefag can work his magic.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B10xgsnoGjDebFBSNXNhSlJyY1k/view

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B10xgsnoGjDebFBSNXNhSlJyY1k/view

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>>7367586
THEN THE WINGED HUSSARS ARRIVED

>>7372389
OR guy here. That was good shit. I like the idea of reading about life at the bunker. I know the androids can eat so do they have a cafeteria? What do they do for fun? Dumb shit like that is cool..

Anyone here write Star Wars stuff?

>>7371757
Are you still open for quick commissions of around 1,000 words? I have a few things to request!


>>7372408
>THEN THE WINGED HUSSARS ARRIVED!
COMING DOWN FROM THE MOUNTAINSIDE!
THEN THE WINGED HUSSARS ARRIVED!
COMING DOWN THEY TURNED THE TIDE!

>>7372744
Sure, I can fit in some ~1k commissions. I'm about to go to bed but I can get one in tomorrow when I've finished my quota for Shiny if you want something done.

>>7372186
>>7372108
All good ideas but I'm going to have to strive to keep these stories short, around the 10k mark. If I manage to reign in my habit of writing double my estimated word counts then I can get five or maybe six short stories done in that month.
I'm recording all this stuff so you guys can pick the best ideas when the time comes to write them.

Does this count?

>>7369520

It's just a scenario that ended up being on my mind a couple days ago.

>>7371123
That was pretty hot dude. Nice job for a first attempt! Only issue I had with it was that you don't really describe what Kh’Qelu looked like but other than that it was really good.

>>7371757
Just read the update and it doesn't seem like you've changed anything. Boyd still gets flustered by the cat and in the update he gets pushed around psychologically by the fluffball.

The snarky remarks about her weight didn't seem to be reduced either.

>>7372972
I replaced all references to blushing or erections, and hardened a lot of his responses to her teasing.
I have not replaced any fat jokes unless Shiny specifies.

>>7373319

(I'm cool with a few of the later ones being swapped out if you can think of anything more fun)

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>>7372408
>>7372389
I really hope I can deliver something which will make you happy.

That fic was fun, thanks for sharing! I'm having a part also which shows some sort of slice of life on the space ship, so I hope you'll be satisfied.

Free time is pretty tight for me, so I go in baby steps, around 1400 words at this point. But maybe after today's batch I'll be able to sit down and continue what's after the B ending for a little.

>>7373319

Also, I just had a thought occur to me: what if polars secretly found it attractive if someone can see through their manipulation or even do it to them successfully? Obviously this wouldn't apply to all of them, but I could easily see some finding that hot for various reasons

>>7369466
Even though I doubt anyone cares, here's a third part, because I enjoyed writing this.

https://pastebin.com/8v09Zt59 - 2000 words

Tags: orgasm denial, sentient penis, wormhole, pregnant, impregnation

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Hey! MissyLewd here.
I've started doing weekly short story exercises to improve my writing. I'd like some feedback on my first draft, thanks!

It's a short piece based on these two characters.

>https://pastebin.com/df9dTKVh

#straightshota #succubus #femdom #sph #modern

>>7373403
>>7373475
Ok I'll review the fat jokes later and see if I can switch a few of them up.
Yeah I could see that working.

2000 word update, royal rumble edition, new content at "They were not pursued"

Or Die Alone:
https://pastebin.com/WYh3N6HP
>no tags yet

>>7373540
I'm an amateur, but here are my thoughts.

There are a couple grammatical errors that you can easily clean up, but I know how boring that is. I never proof read whatever I write.

There are some odd line breaks in there. I don't see why. Fixing things like that is an easy way to make your story seem more professional or something.

I feel like the language is a bit awkward, but that might just be me projecting my own style onto you. I don't really know how to describe it.

You should try to avoid using the same word too often, like here
>His groggy eyes scanned his room
Saying "the room" instead would make the text flow better. Things like this are easy to overlook, too.

A lot of your paragraphs begin with a name or a preposition. I personally try to avoid this, but I don't know if it's something seasoned writers try to avoid, but it's probably good to be aware regardless.

Keep writing!

>>7373538
>Even though I doubt anyone cares, here's a third part, because I enjoyed writing this.

Don't worry about the lack of response, the important thing is that you have an attitude that a lot of other people here ought to take up, myself included. I mean, if you don't enjoy your own works how can you expect anyone else to do so?

>>7373410
Don't worry about me. Just write what you enjoy writing and make sure you're proud with the end result. Enjoy the game too!

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>>7373557
Thanks for the feedback, I really appreciate it!
The line breaks are probably from when I transferred the text from my word document onto pastebin.

I'll try to be mindful of my errors and awkward language when I continue and edit the story. I think it's because I've been writing essays and objective pieces that my stories come off as formulaic and 'soulless'. I'll experiment with different ways I can possibly fix that.

Thanks!

>>7372787
Pretty good premise/concept (at least to my tastes). I'd read it.

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Hey, I've written some monster girl stories, some smut and some not, but I figured I might as well share it here. There's no overtly /d/ themes in the stories besides the monster girls themselves, but I feel as if it's worth sharing.

This one is the longest one I've written so far, and it's about a guy who comes home from work one night to find a Jinko (pic related) in his kitchen, claiming to be his new wife. You can find my other stories in my pastebin if you want to read them as well, the 5 most recent ones involve varying levels of smut, while the 4 oldest have no smut whatsoever.

https://pastebin.com/6sfsEgLb

Let me know what you thought of the story (or stories), and feel free to provide some feedback or criticism if you feel like it.

Tags: 2nd person POV, monster girls, Jinko (tiger woman), pawjob, rape, fingering, blowjob, family life.

So does anyone have a copy of Family of Three? google took it down for whatever reason.

>>7373557
>I never proof read whatever I write.
You are the reason about 90% of every comments I do for fapfiction starts by pointing out typos.

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>>7374048
>bikini
>pauldrons
>needlessly large claws that obfuscate simple actions
>blush
>clear cut skin/fur distinctioon

For a brief second I was excited to discover this thread, but it's a very /d/ sort of thread. All futas and furries and space aliens engaging in quick fetishes.

>>7374518
i mean, not to be rude, but what did you expect?

>>7374525
Most of the writers are actually vanilla sorts, but they tend to lie low unless someone actually shows interest in what they prefer to write.

>>7374048
That's awsome. This is now definitely a favorite, love the actual family time. The tiger story is 10/7 my friend. I'll look at the others later.

>>7374048
>Jinko (tiger woman)
hngggh

Hey all. First time posting in a thread like this. Just hit a wall creatively with ideas for a story on writing for the gf. I'm incorporating pet play, conditioning, BDSM and humiliation of anyone can help me come up with some ideas. Thanks!

>>7374048

>fingering
>with those paws

My god.

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>>7374518
Sorry.

What are you interested in? If it's something I've never tackled before, I'd be willing to try to make something short about it.

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>>7369024
Hey, wanted to ask if there's been any progress on part II of that Belchandra story (not the OR btw). I know you've been busy with irl shit tho, so I don't want to make you feel pressured, just curious cause I'm pretty excited for it.

>>7374485
You're welcome my senpai

>>7374703
Master reverse housebreaks her pet, to the pet's embarrassment.

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>>7374997
>image
i am summoned and accept this offering

but for real, i'm really glad you're looking forward to the story. part ii is about 25% right now, but currently my priority is >>7368310 's request since i said i'd do it next. that one's already about half done, and *should* be finished and posted sometime this evening. i'm out for the morning and early afternoon tomorrow but when i'm back after that i'll get to work on part ii and finish it that night, then start on >>7370405 and >>7372270 simultaneously on sunday.

>>7375023

Shine on, you crazy butt diamond.

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>>7375023
Awesome! Looking forward to it, thanks for the response.

Also you got good taste in Tenryuu pics

>>7374518
I don't know, anon. I took a quick browse and came to the conclusion that this is a pretty comfy place. Here nearly all the discussion is about writing or the subject material. No shitposting, no offtopicing. So even maybe if a /lit/ or a /yuri/ thread would be better for my vanillaish stuff, I prefer hanging out here.

>>7374048
>2nd person

Never, EVER use 2nd person unless you want it to sound like a shallow self-insert wank fantasy with blank slates instead of characters. If that's what you're aiming for, congratulations.

If not, rewrite the whole thing in 1st or 3rd person- they can do everything the 2nd person view does infinitely better, and it actually allows you to develop the characters beyond the equivalent of cardboard cutouts. Apart from that, it's not bad but it's just...kind of formulaic. Like I've read this same fic before dozens of times by who knows how many other people.

>>7375293
Never, EVER use 1st person unless you want it to sound like a shallow self-insert wank fantasy with blank slates instead of characters. If that's what you're aiming for, congratulations.

>>7375318
I don't know about you, but being told what "you" feel and what "you" do is pretty close to being self-insert to me, especially when "you" apparently show all the personality of an inanimate object reacting to whatever's happening and nothing else.

Second person has its uses- mainly, in advertising, rhetoric, and instruction manuals. In fiction on the other hand, there is absolutely no good reason to use it for any reason. Even a character being depicted in 1st person can still show an independent personality, but by definition the "you" in a second person story simply cannot be given a defined set of characteristics. That's bad writing in fiction, plain and simple.

>>7375318
There's nothing wrong with first-person narration.
It's very contextual but there's no reason not to use it if you're telling a story from a single perspective.
2nd person however only really works in a "choose your own adventure" scenario, and even then it prevents the reader from being able to infer emotions and sensations. It tells you what you're feeling, rather than painting a picture and allowing the reader's imagination to fill in the blanks.
At the end of the day, literature is kindling for imagination, no story should be a dry, play-by-play account. You need to give the reader enough to let their imagination do its work, rather than negating that by simply explaining what they should feel, everyone likes subtly different things and will react differently to situations and stimuli.

>>7375338
>>7375342
i realize i'm in the minority here but for certain scenarios i find second-person to actually be pretty [spoiler]hot[/spoiler]

the immediacy and pseudo-intimacy of 'you' works very well for fantasies about, say, being teased mercilessly, or tied up and dominated by a hot character, etc. i'm not trying to defend it as 'good writing', but when i read smut i'm not looking for high literature. a decent grasp of the english language is required, sure, but beyond that the only thing that matters is how frequently and precisely it fulfills my various weird-ass fetishes.

>>7375356
I guess if you're only looking for something of the depth and complexity of an image caption, but that's not really what we deal in here.
Mots of our content is stories that feature sex, porn plots are generally looked down upon as overly simplistic and trite.

>>7375356
If something is written for a specific person like in an ERP session for instance, then 2nd person works.

If you want to hit a broad audience like in here, it's terrible.

>>7375356
Possibly, but fulfilling fetishes alone is not enough for making good smut, especially when it comes at the expense of plot and characters.

>>7375370
While some of the fics in here are still more porn than plot, they at least try to make the reader care about the people having sex, as opposed to having them be just objects to help them jerk off.

>>7375379

>as opposed to having them be just objects to help them jerk off.

it has its time and place honestly

>>7375386
I disagree, I think it's fundamentally uninteresting and amateurish.
There can be no emotional weight to a sex scene if you don't know or care about who the characters are, how they feel or why they're doing it.
I don't think that it's a matter of opinion to say that a sex scene that is properly built up with developed characters that the reader identifies with is more sexually gratifying than the same scene taken out of context with none of the buildup.

>>7375379
>Possibly, but fulfilling fetishes alone is not enough for making good smut

Maybe we just have different definitions of good smut then. 'Is competently written and includes the things i like' is kind of all I care about. A good story and likable characters are nice, sure, but they're much less important than the other stuff. I've actually had stories that would have otherwise been hot turn me off because of how much effort was put into the plot and characterization. Neither of those are inherently bad of course, but for me there's a limit to how involved they can be before a story becomes something I'd read for actual literary enjoyment rather than arousal. The feeling I get from getting invested in a cool story and the feeling I get from reading porn are almost mutually exclusive, so if i'm reading to get off i prefer something that errs closer to the latter..

this is >>7375392 again:

>>7375389
>I don't think that it's a matter of opinion to say that a sex scene that is properly built up with developed characters that the reader identifies with is more sexually gratifying than the same scene taken out of context with none of the buildup.

That's what i was hitting on at the end of my previous reply, actually. How buildup is too much varies wildly depending on context, though. I don't think I could really give a good example without making you read through some incredibly niche fetish stories, but I am a firm believer that for certain scenes and certain kinks, less is more when it comes to characters and plot.

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2000 word update, new content at "Boyd awoke to warmth"

Made some retcons to the fight scene to avoid damaging Boyd's suit, he now gets cut on the face instead of the arm.

Or Die Alone:
https://pastebin.com/WYh3N6HP
>no tags yet

>>7375023
>Mikoyan
Patrician taste.

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>>7375398

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>>7375401

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>>7375403

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>>7375404

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>>7375407

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>>7375410

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>>7375411
And here's one for D. just because I can.

>>7375293
Thanks for the feedback, I appreciate it. All my other stuff is written in 3rd person, that one is in 2nd since I wrote pretty much half of it, and decided it was too late and not worth the effort to turn back, but I'll make a point of sticking with 1st or 3rd from here on out. I'll also try in the future to make more compelling characters and stories I suppose.

>>7375429
Good thinking. The monstergirl niche is a very crowded one here, so anything you can do to distinguish yourself within it will be all the more helpful.

>>7375023
OR of the bel Chandra request. Sounds good! Will continue lurking until you wrap up!

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>>7375397
Some, perhaps. But it's surprisingly easy to reconcile literary enjoyment and arousal if you put your mind to it. It's not like it needs to be the Great American Novel to be good smut, but at the very least it ought to be capable of holding its own as a fic even if it had all the porn removed and replaced with fading to black. Anything less than that, and you may as well be using stuff like pic related. Which admittedly has its own charms, but doesn't exactly make for good reading unless you turn your brain off first.

>>7375469
Eh, I think we'll have to agree to disagree here, but it's probably more due to my personal kinks than anything else. Objectification and intense, wide-scale sexualization are a really, really big deal for me, and neither of those (at least, not in the way I enjoy them) lend themselves particularly well to involved, plausible plotlines.

>>7375484
I can see why. By definition, they're mutually exclusive with characterization since they can't be objectified if they're given signs of individuality.

>>7375492
On the contrary, wouldn't a total lack of characterization in contrast to the other, better developed characters in the story serve to further reinforce the objectification angle?

>>7375496
...kind of? but not really, to be honest. The type of 'objectification' I like isn't included in a lot of smut that advertises objectification, funnily enough. From what I've seen, it's almost always coupled with degradation: the idea that the person being objectified is 'lower' than other people, worthless, only good for sex, etc. That kinda stuff doesn't really interest me.

The fetish I have is closer to, and jesus christ this sounds fucking pretentious but I'm really not sure how else to explain it... meta-objectification, I guess? Like, not necessarily that the character is dominated, harassed, or treated as an object by others, but more that they're given that treatment by the medium itself in which they're portrayed.

For smut specifically, that means things like long, luxurious descriptions of body parts or genitalia, inordinate amounts of attention being given to certain features that I find attractive, and, as a more extreme example, the plot itself either revolving around or twisting to accommodate a specific fetish. Stuff like that, for whatever reason, gets me going like nothing else.

holy fuck this is long i didnt expect to write a dissertation on my kinks today but it was actually kind of fun

>>7375508
as an addendum: another good example to help illustrate what i mean would be *those* anime. You know, the ones that constantly stop just shy of actually being marketed as porn, but have so many fanservicey camera angles or 'accidental' wardrobe malfunctions or what have you that it goes far beyond the bounds of plausibility. And again, I'm not saying that's good writing or good direction, or even an example people should follow. I just find it really fucking hot.

>>7375508
>>7375514
Huh, well that's a very unique case that I've not encountered before, I can certainly see how that would play out.

>>7375525
the nice part is that, despite how intense it is, it's actually pretty unobtrusive when it comes to my own writing. stuff like long fanservicey descriptions and porny plot turns are seen as par for the course at worst, or even (especially for body-worship stuff) a legitimate upside. if I took it as far as i would prefer it, then it might end up weirding people out, but i haven't reached the point where i'm comfortable writing smut entirely for self-gratification anyway.

>>7375398
Snek, I dunno if it's intentional, but this made me realize how often you start with "Boyd awoke to (something.) It's not necessarily a criticism, because it's not necessarily a bad thing, but I figured I'd point it out?

>>7375415
(high-fives)

>>7375631
It's a cheap simple scene transition, not surprising he's using it a lot

This is pretty niche, but does anyone know of stories or even writers here as take requests involving female-leading gangbang/group stuff? I guess it could possibly be also called reverse harem
Like one girl, many guys, but she's the one calling the shots, like a girl inna room with a bunch of dudes lounging around, and she's riding one into the ground and then moving on to the next, telling them all what to do, maybe with each other
That sort of thing

>>7376127
Well shit buddy, you could probably get either snek (somewhere in July) or D. to pick that up, you play the request right.
Of course, if you don't like futa or implacable femdom catgirls, you're fucked, bud, unless you can somehow get the local big ass guy in for it or are extremely lucky and get an unknown, or produce enough of a greasy unclean feeling for DLFG whenever she comes around

>>7376209

Pretty sure Snek's broker race would be perfect for that

>>7376291
How so? All we really know of them is that they're rubber mask tentacle monsters with a monoculture of sociopathic/sadistic capitalism.

>>7375398
>https://pastebin.com/WYh3N6HP
I kind of which there was lewd teasing. Not intentional mind you. Just he got in the sleeping bag there. I expected more details.

>>7375293
>>7375318
Never, EVER post an opinion online unless you're ready for someone to completely hate it.

>>7374914
I'm not that guy, but write about this:

There is a capsule hotel in Japan called 9H. When you check in, they give you a room for exactly 9 hours. 1 to shower, 7 to sleep and 1 to relax. What they don't tell you is that booking a room comes with a Monstergirl, to keep you warm at night.

That extra hour isn't really for "relaxing."

Write something that is both incredibly comfy and has hardcore sex.

>>7376291
i would doubt it, seeing as I would suspect that the only reason they care in terms of who's running the show is that she wants a woman-focused gangbang thing and she expects a fic with at the very least rudimentry feelings on the women's part, rather than a psychopath molesting several victims at once, which is what by all measures you are suggesting

>>7376291
>>7376364
>>7376308
Newsflash, assholes
Snek is clinically incapable of distinguishing Lust+Possessiveness from actual love and affection, and if you for some idiotic reason want a zero-empathy fetish specialist to not write that, you're
all such damn fools that if Caesar was alive, you'd all be chained to oars

>>7376315

Don't worry, there will be exactly what you described soon, word for word too
>>7376388
Not only are you retarded AND wrong, you will see proof about it in the commission

hello, popping in from the comfort of inactivity again. just been focused on improving some boring things but desu i need to pressure myself to do more complete drawings since then i have to deal with things im horrible at.

still doing the rat man thing because hell, why not (dont answer that)

http://i.imgur.com/CHGDXB2.png skaven x elf

>>7376127
So, what were you thinking? Like, a sex dungeon, with the woman keeping the men not because they want to be there, necessarily? Or like that she's so desirable that men would want to share her, just to be near her, and she's so insatiable she needs several men? I imagine you have some preferences in that regard, and they might not align with mine.

>>7365428
It's an interesting idea, and I certainly haven't written anything in the chitin-and-carapace vein for a while. I'll toss the idea around for a bit and we'll see if anything emerges.

>>7376629
I saw the couple of WIP's you posted in the secondary gallery a while back - nice to see you're still at it. You're definitely improving, the faces especially, and the texture as ever are lovely. Though, IMO, the pose would work better if the first Skaven had a hand under her thigh/backside. It'd give her some extra support - as it is, he'd need to pull her forwards while thrusting, or they'd topple over backwards!

>>7376734
yeah ive a need to work more on finding decent references: problems like that don't become apparent enough to me until its too late to fix it. would help with some other bits. planning on improving on refining the process: better outlines, stronger lines, better shading, etc. glad to see that some improvement is noticeable.

>>7376732
Closer to the second one
Like a bunch of people who are all into the group sex thing and want to be there, because I am not at all into noncon, but the girl is the one taking the lead, she's the one doing the fucking, if that makes sense
>>7376209
I already have my own idea how to do it with borleans, though I'll wait a while to suggest it to him, but taking my regular humans idea and futa-fying it for D. isn't a bad idea, if he's done the comission.

>>7376629
Good to see you Skavanon, looking good.

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>>7376291
>>7376308
Right now (and this is early days, subject to change) I'm thinking the Brokers are going to be doing much (but not all) sex through proxies due to the fragility of their bodies. They're mercantile and their culture revolves around debt and trade, the way they look at the world is every problem having a financial solution, so a potential scenario could be:
>Broker is horny
>finds a human and a Borealan
>tells them it'll pay off the Human's college debt if she can deepthroat the Borealan
>Broker gets itself off while laughing maniacally from the safety of its Breaker suit as the Human chokes
>keeps upping the ante with more money to drive them to more depraved acts

Should be fun to experiment with how far you could push someone with the reward of absurd amounts of money, and it opens up all potential racial pairings. Male Krell subduing and dominating a female Borealan for example, which hasn't happened before, Krell-Human-Borealan spitroast, etc.
Saves me having to set up more elaborate scenarios to make those unusual pairings happen, I can skip a lot of exposition.

It also makes the Brokers vulnerable when someone eventually woos one, the sex would have to be very careful and measured compared to what I usually write.

I did want some tentacle fucking in there, but I may give the pressure suits tentacle arms and they can do it that way instead, after all it would make sense for a species that has tentacles to make a pressure suit with tentacles rather than arms. Again, still on the drawing board.

>>7376983
Well there goes my boner for good. I was going to suggest something involving consenticles and brokers from what little I knew before, but now I just want to wipe out the entire species

>>7377030
Consentacles would actually be perfect for the Broker itself, as it would be too fragile for anything more intense.

>>7376983
just a thought snake, but if forced degradation for the promise of money isn't the exact fetish you're building brokers for, I'd actually suggest changing them up some, so that they're more interested in novelty, seeing something they haven't seen before over using money to force people to do shit they don't want to
As a suggestion, consider a Broker searching far and wide to find the most complete perverts from each known race and assembling them with the goal of producing porn videos with scenarios that brokers have never seen before, in order to make vast sums of money and get off at the same time because that would make a good framing device without making them so hopelessly sociopathic that people hate them rather than wanting to fap

>>7377061

>Aliens with "alien" behavior? Perish the thought!

>>7377061
>group of interspecies porn stars doing whatever crazy shit comes into their and/or their boss' head
>pornstars who are so lewd they'd do what they're doing for free but are happy to get paid for it
Fuck year, that's perfect

>>7377061
that's weirdly close to a fetish scenario I haven't been able to find in writing so far, so I'd be down for it

Also, D, how's the Grand Futapest Hotel going? I would definitely like more of that

>>7377133
>that's weirdly close to a fetish scenario I haven't been able to find in writing so far,
What's that? Even if snek doesn't, somebody else might

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>>7377133

When was the last time you read it? I've got three chapters so far, and the next one is almost done.

The Grande Futapest Hotel
http://pastebin.com/SjeEbP1Y
>tags: futanari, futa-on-female, futa-on-futa, huge dicks, balls, ballsucking, blowjobs, anal, vaginal, deepthroat, vibrator, hands-free, cumswapping, kissing, porn, real world, I wish the real world would just stop hasslin' me

>>7376958
Uh... maybe? Not sure that request is my speed. Any time I try to write anything straight, I just get bored.

>>7377141
It's entirety about exhibitionism, FWIW
>humans encounter and get to know aliens
>their culture very strongly values live performances over recordings
>they've seen human pornography and want it live
>absurdly wholesome 50s-tier couple who secretly enjoy the idea of an audience take the job
>they have cuddly I-love-you sex in front of massive alien audiences who go crazy for it
>in the local traditions, you don't get artists/celebs to sign stuff, you sign their body with a space felt-tip
>human couple enjoying the afterglow, holding hands while alien fanboys sign their naked bodies
>maybe it revs them up enough for another round, which the aliens go absolutely crazy for, them fucking with the audience's names written a over them

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2000 word update, new content at “It's incredibly strong, but it isn't too fast"

Or Die Alone:
https://pastebin.com/WYh3N6HP
>no tags yet

>>7377061
>>7377218
I'm not really into that kind of porn theater stuff, though the Brokers aren't intended to be degrading, beyond the simple fact that you degrade yourself by taking money for sex.

>>7376983
>>7377404
Tbh I'd rather have more krell stuff before starting on another race, since we've only seen one very specific scenario with them so far and they've got plenty more potential

>>7377426
It'll likely be two or three months before I have time to get to any Broker stuff. You can put in a Krell request for the short story month if you have any scenarios you'd like to see.

God Damn but we've got to find somebody other than snek to write snekverse shit

>>7377404
So are the brokers gonna be paying people to have sex with each other for their amusement or paying humans to fuck them? Like a pretty human type story but with tentacles.

All hail consentacles.

>>7377428
Hey snek, I'm thinking about maybe writing something of my own in your world, and I'm wondering what kind of scenario would lead to a polar cub being raised by humans?

>>7376388
>if Caesar was alive, you'd all be chained to oars
now there's a phrase I never thought I'd see in english
>have you ever been so mad you started using classical roman insults?
>>737782
as someone who's tried that before, my first suggestion would be to make sure your computer is not going to suddenly die on you

As for the cub, a polar going full hermit, and a month or so later realizing they're pregnant, and dying when the kid's ~1, and a human finding and raising the little kid is not completely implausible

>>7377547
Nobody else wants to. I can't imagine why.

>>7377527
It's a little disjointed and underwhelming, to be completely honest.
The voyeuristic weird framing thing is superfluous and sometimes makes it hard to tell what's actually going on, there's a few grammer errors and missing words, the pre-sex interaction is pretty flat and doesn't really do anything story-wise, and you could really stand to be more descriptive, especially of the actual sex
Also, there is pretty much no foreplay when there really should be

>>7377945
Thanks, I think I'll try to stick to shorter stories and see if that helps the issues.

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Something for the old /tg/ crowd, I guess.

>>7377992
Noice

>>7377963
You really just need to work on your detail and descriptions, honestly. Being shorter or longer won't really change anything

Does anybody have a newer link to the discord that's in the google doc? Kinda interested in finding someone who'd beta reader a I just finished working that includes some deliciously consensual tentacles

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...oh sure, let's stop the argument ONCE the topic starts to fall off the board.

Let's talk about something we can all agree on. I've heard rumors of such a thing as a non-futa woman. Like the land sea lion, I believe she is just a phantom, or maybe a futa hiding her she-cock with a piece of driftwood.

What do YOU think? Should we put this non-futa woman in the list of cryptids with mermaids and the chupacabre?

Actually, that makes me think of futa mermaids, either ones that somehow still have a dick (with a little scallop-shell bra holding their balls in place) or maybe a mermaid whose entire lower half is a dick. They swim through the water like a sperm, spinning the dick around and moving like a torpedo.

Who wants to write about that?

(that's the only futa mermaid pic I found that wasn't Ariel, and if I posted THAT after making a big deal out of 'underage' stuff, I'd be a big fat hypocrite)

>>7378113
You're drunk D, go home

Bruh, anyone got any Marge Simpson x reader fanfics?

Stay on topic anon.

Loli is against board rules and will get us all in trouble.

Visit /b/ to discuss it at length.

I think the mass deletion that just happened should make it absolutely clear what the mods' stance on loli is. If you know what's good for you, don't ask again.

>>7375023
OR. If you're around I'll be dipping in and out, but I'll anchor post for you in the next thread if I miss out on Sunday. Good luck!

Also figured up a personality for Chatalie. Perhaps you can make her a braggart, the kind of girl that uses 'like' or talks big but can't walk the walk.

Do you think you can make the guy bury his face in her big butt somewhere too?

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>>7376734
Coolio.
Good luck and here's hoping it works out!

>we're actually back under the bump limit now
Holy fuck
And to keep it on topic, a question:
Multi-cocks; over-under or side-by-side?

>>7378367
It's actually the second time this thread. And it depends on the type of creature said dicks are attached to.

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>>7378367
Over-under for sure. I'm usually not a multidick kinda guy but then I saw some pretty great snekman art that did the concept justice and changed my tune a little bit. Pic related.

>>7378367
Over-under is better for DP
Side-by-side is better for threesomes

>>7378367
Definitely over/under

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>>7378343
i'm here! irl shit ended up pulling me away from writing for longer than i would have liked, but i'm back on the grind now. still finishing up the mall story unfortunately, but that'll be done by tonight (if you count 2 or 3 am as tonight anyway). i'm free all of sunday though, which should give me plenty of time to finish up the Bel-Chandra story and possibly the softcore expansion one too. i'm probably gonna do a shorter story for that, since it seems like it would lend itself better to a vignette anyway, and once it's finished i'll i'll definitely start on Chatalie.

really sorry about the delays, and thanks for being patient.

>>7378490
Oh neat! Don't worry about delays since shit happens all the time.
Also for thorough butt harrassment, perhaps she could wear a small white thong underneath her skirt, perfect for pulling for wedgies?

>>7378388
Holy shit I think I need to write a note to myself to do some multi-dick soon. That's hot as fuck.

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>>7378601
For your perusal.

>>7378601
please do, a story based on that image would be both cut and hot as fuck

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>>7378618

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>>7378624
And one more, a bit less gentle this time.

These images just gave me an idea
>smol girl 'training' herself with massive bad dragon toys so that she can finally take her alien boyfriend's giant space dick(s)

>>7366571
There is a spells called Orgasm and Orgy that are canon.

>>7374048
Alright finished reading the rest of your stuff and I gotta say it's pretty good. A minor complaint is that the sentences tend to follow the same pattern like starting with verbs or are generally simple sentences. Other than that they're pretty good. Always makes me happy to see monstergirl writers who aren't totally shit.

>>7376983
This race is a group of porn funders. It allows you to write stories without much buildup and to explore interesting match ups between partners without more justification than a quick "payed to do it by pervy tentacle jew".

More than an entire race of these "producers" it seems like it should be like a one-off aberration that just kinda exists on the far reaches of inhabited space that pays the desperate chumps out here to do whatever degrading/amusing thing it's thinking about at the time.

>>7378618
>>7378624
>>7378628

Thanks!! These will definitely come in handy.

Would you by any chance know where I could read up a bit on the context of these images? When I pulled it up on danbooru it didn't really give me all that much since googling the copyright tag didn't help.

>>7378623
The more I look at the pictures, the hotter it all seems so it might just bump the orc village story I had in mind further down the list.

>>7378659
Orc village story? This might be relevant to my interests
Also, cute/romantic large insertion/nonhuman stuff is sadly quite rare so more of it is extremely welcome

>>7378672
I have no idea, unfortunately. IIRC I originally saved them from the profile of one of my old F-list partners, not a booru or imageboard, so your guess is as good as mine.

>>7378686
Oh, OK. I thought you might have picked up a request from last thread that I liked a bunch
At any rate, lizard dicks=very yes

>>7378694
Oh shit, sorry, that reply was meant for >>7378659
about the snakeman pictures, not your request. I'm not the dude who mentioned writing the orc village or the multi-dick stuff.

>>7378698
Oh no worries, it's completely on me, vast amounts of rum having utterly destroyed my reading comprehension
It wasn't actually my request, just one I saw and liked. I'm kinda shit at writing pitches so I mostly just follow other people's ideas that I like

>>7365349

>Orc village story? This might be relevant to my interests

Yep. The idea is an adventurer wakes up in an orc village. At first she mistakes them for the ones that had just killed her friends but he explains that their village is peaceful and in fact, they had quite the population of humans happily living with them. Their talk is cut short when a neighboring orc village attacks. The adventurer helps defend the village. Afterwards, she notices the orc's erection and he explains that battle causes arousal for them which leads to her helping him out.

>Also, cute/romantic large insertion/nonhuman stuff is sadly quite rare so more of it is extremely welcome

I'm not entirely confident in my ability to do large insertion but I will definitely try to make it a cute and loving scene.

>>7378686
I guess I'll just need to get creative then!

>>7378709

Well fuck me. That was meant for >>7378672

Using an app on my phone that I'm not entirely used to yet.

Apparently, replying to multiple posts at once is a fucking nightmare.

>>7378709
>I'm not entirely confident in my ability to do large insertion
it's honestly fairly simple. really it's all about the sensation of being completely full, feeling stretched, but in a nice sort of way
it really lends itself well enough to cute stuff, with the physical feeling of closeness and deep [spoiler]throbbing [/spoiler] fulfillment accompanying the romantic one

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all right my dudes it is 5:30 in the god damn morning and i've been writing about butts for like 6 hours straight. >>7368262 , i hope you're still here because this one is for you. i realize i didn't get to everything you mentioned in your request and i sincerely apologize for that; the initial setup and descriptions kinda got away from me. i hope you like it anyway, and as always let me know what if there's anything you'd like me to change in post or accentuate in the future

https://pastebin.com/30mVps3b

tags:
>ass expansion, extreme ass/thigh focus, clothing destruction via ass expansion, pseudo-ENF, accidental exhibitionism, embarrassment in general

pt ii of bel-chandra story is next, but for now im going the FUCK to sleep. regularly scheduled 10posting will resume tomorrow. good night anons, wherever you are.

>>7378916
>writing about butts for like 6 hours straight
>posts tits

Anon, I…

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>>7378918
it was the only decently sleep-related picture i had jeez

>>7378918
He's found the light.

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Anyone knows what happened to Lewdanon ?

>>7378916
OR of bel Chandra. Still looking forward to the story! Will link to outline again if you need something to refresh your memory >>7367916

>>7378950
He's still around. He drops by in the /tg/ drawthreads occasionally.

>>7378916

>justpaste is not available

Come on!

>>7379005
Which makes me ask: why do you guys prefer Pastebin over GoogleDrive? Because it's plain and simple? Or because it has a view counter?

>>7379008
ease of use, don't need a sign in to view stories, you don't even need to make an account to create a pastebin, no real restriction to what can and can't be posted, etc
also tradition has a good amount to do with it too

>>7379008
That, and because it isn't linked to a Google account.

>>7378854
Hm. I guess the approach wouldn't be so different from consentacles then. I just need to play a bit with how the twin cocks aren't variable in size compares to how an amorphous tentacle creature might be.

>>7379008
>>7379011
On that note, what other ways do you guys know for distributing writing? Say if I wanted to have permalinks for things like full pdfs or other document files instead of just the text content?

>>7378642
Thanks, I appreciate it. I'll take a look at what you mentioned and try to improve on that.

>>7378916

OR here. Thank you so much, this is great.

>>7365349
Finally got around to editing and posting my first bit of erotic fiction. Feedback would be appreciated!

tags: tentacle monster x human female, fantasy, consentacles

https://pastebin.com/CUxdCG5p

I was on the fence about whether to include large insertion and/or excessive cum. I don't think they quite apply but if any of you guys think they do, let me know and I'll add them.

Also, since I want to start noting down ideas for a story related to >>7378388 , does anybody have any suggestions in terms of pictures/artists/ or fiction/writers who have done snake men and multi-dick particularly well?

I'm doing my own research but suggestions would be nice.

>>7375338
There's no such thing as a poor choice of perspective, only a poor use of it.
Second person crops up a lot in rpg gamebook material for obvious reasons, and it works well in more conventional fiction if the purpose is to explore the idea of being a different person yourself rather than read about a different person. Lazy implementations can result in blank, boring protagonists in wish fulfillment narratives though.

Rewriting a scene into a different perspective is a pretty basic exercise used to dispel the misconception that perspective has that kind of control.

>>7375342
>It tells you what you're feeling, rather than painting a picture and allowing the reader's imagination to fill in the blanks.
You never have to detail everything in any perspective.

>>7379185
>Lazy implementations can result in blank, boring protagonists in wish fulfillment narratives though.

Even when done right, it's still ultimately labeling a character as "you" which in all likelihood doesn't act anything like the reader if said character even takes his own actions outside the reader's input (e.g. in quests and CYOAs).

It's further complicated in smut since ultimately most of it is wish fulfillment in some form or another, either on the author's part or that of the audience. Not a bad thing in itself, but the issue is still there.

>>7379199
>it's still ultimately labeling a character as "you" which in all likelihood doesn't act anything like the reader
That's actually part of the power of it. It's not often you want to exploit it, but it's excellent if you want to create a slightly off-kilter feeling. Of particular note is horror, where the imposition of feelings and decisions on the reader can amplify the sensation of powerlessness and being constricted by events, or narratives where a certain level of emotional disconnect enhances things. A superb example of that is Tolstoy's Sevastopol sketches, based on his experiences in the siege of Sevastopol.

Additionally, you ignore the possibility of a reader who is interested in immersing themselves into a character who is different from them; compartmentalizing their own personality to see the world from an entirely different point of view for a little while, drawing on similar skills to roleplaying or method acting. It's not something everyone can do - some people are always stuck with a constant awareness that it is a very specific Them sat there reading a story, and it will always fall horribly flat for them - but thinking that this method of engaging with fiction doesn't exist is inaccurate.

>>7379226
To try and bring it back around to smut, the rationale for the use of second person in horror can lend itself well to a dom/sub narrative. To balance out mentioning Tolstoy, I'll mention New Order and Blue Monday.

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>>7378916
Bless you anon, amazing job as always. My hype for the conclusion to the Bel-Chandra story is through the fuckin roof but enjoy your break, you've earned it.

>>7379183
It's pretty damn good, especially for a first story. The only thing I noticed wrong was a handful of spelling mistakes
My main suggestion would be for a bit more pre-sex interaction but that's really just a matter of personal preference
Consensual tentacles is something this thread could definitely use more of

>>7377822
Sure you can do that, just be sure to credit me if you post it anywhere like Literotica or Hentai-Foundry, otherwise my readers might flag it as plagiarism.

I guess an orphan or an abandoned runt raised by humans maybe? Borealan kittens are usually raised communally so it wouldn't be too unusual or disruptive to their development.

>>7377644
Definitely the first, but any actual sex with Brokers is going to be of the more romantic variety as getting one out of its pressure suit would require a lot of trust and caution.

>>7378709
Large insertion is less about describing the dimensions of the object and more about describing the reactions people have to it, both from the perspective of the female (or male) taker who is struggling with the size of it, all the pressure and discomfort that eventually resolves into pleasure once they get accustomed to it being inside them, and also from the perspective of the giver who is trying to fuck something way too small and tight for him.

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2000 word update, new content at " Boyd leapt out the way"

Or Die Alone:
https://pastebin.com/WYh3N6HP
>no tags yet

>>7379565
Thanks! I was pretty sure I had weeded out any spelling/grammar errors but I'll take another look.

And yes, I agree. There needs to be more consensual tentacles. Whenever I wrote more about this character/story, I'll be sure to include more foreplay and other interactions.

>>7379600
Mm, I see. I'll keep that in mind then, thanks. Definitely planning to write from the female's perspective but I'll try and show the male's reactions to the penetration as well.

>>7379600
>romantic variety as getting one out of its pressure suit would require a lot of trust
That seems pretty at odds with everything else about the brokers culturally, they really seem like the type who would only do sex as part of a calculated deal with other brokers
Romantic feelings seem like they wouldn't even be in their conceptual vocabulary given everything else about them

>>7379670
>Romantic feelings seem like they wouldn't even be in their conceptual vocabulary given everything else about them
Ah, I see your problem. You're trying to apply actual logic to Snek's stories, rather than porn logic. He's been adamant about this for quite some time now: the setting is simply there to facilitate the fetishes, and if he has to bend his own internal logic for it, then he'll bend that logic into a fucking mobius strip.

>>7379670
I don't see why being a mercantile race precludes romance. I never said they were callous or unemotional, just that they liked money.

>>7379695
It's not that they're mercantile, it's that they don't have anything resembling empathy and romance doesn't work without that

>>7379703
That's entirely conjecture, I have never said anything of the sort.
Think of them as Wall Street bankers, they deal with money on a daily basis and they see things in monetary terms, but that doesn't preclude them marrying and having relationships.

>>7379725
I mean, you were just posting about them liking to use money to coerce people into doing shit they don't want to do, and literally cackling like a cartoon supervillain at it. That's pretty fucking psychotic shit dog

>>7379735
Making a blanket assumption that they're incapable of empathy because one or more of them like to pay people to fuck seems extreme to me.
That's like saying if you've ever watched JAV porn you're incapable of love.

>>7379744
>That's like saying if you've ever watched JAV porn you're incapable of love.
I mean if you beat your dick to the idea that the people in the porn you're watching don't want to be doing it then I'd say you're pretty fucked up, yeah

new thread
>>7379812

>>7379750
/d/ may not be the right place for you, friend

>>7379815
We don't do new threads until the current one is at the bottom of page 10 or dead, my friend