Welcome back, Anons! Last time, we finished up Jeff Parker's Thunderbolts. Now, we're going to get started with his Dark Avengers. Stick around, and I'll have a pleasant surprise for you!
It's still April Fool's day where I am!
Before you ask, this isn't the surprise I mentioned in the OP. Like I said, it's a PLEASANT surprise.
>tits on full display
Yeah, it's THAT kind of series.
And now you see where Bendis/Gaydos got the design for Luke in Alias from.
Yeah, Luke's kind of a dick in this series.
>>50888
Same here.
Turns out, you can't spoil images with 4chanX.
>>51125
There's no way to make that line sound cool, I'm sorry.
>>51400
Yeah, the Marvel MAX line was shit. Punisher was the sole exception.
>>51347
Somebody's been posting Devilman without spoilers and the mods don't seem to mind.
>>51456
Fury max
Don't let the Spider-Man reference fool you, this isn't 616-canon. As you will see later on.
>>51478
Really? Huh, I guess I don't have to keep a different window open to do this thread then.
>>51524
Maybe, but then compare Deadpool Max and Alias.
Is this a good time to do this when the board is in this weird mode? Desu might not catch it
>>51478
Mods don't seem to notice unless a lot of people report stuff. The latest celeb leaks stay in Arrow threads for hours these days
Fucking hell, is that guy in the fourth panel wearing a gee skin?
>>51698
>Maybe, but then compare Deadpool Max and Alias.Supreme Power and the hood were decent
but your right.
>>51737
>The latest celeb leaks
??
You know, now that I'm reading this again, I think THIS is why Bendis likes Luke so much, instead of the great 70's-80's series.
>>51737
Desu may not catch it, but is Cage MAX that big a loss?
>>51737
That's why I'm doing a throwaway story that isn't canon, as opposed to continuing on.
Remember when I said this isn't in 616? Yeah, with scenes like this, they really make you wonder for a while.
>>51855
So what you're saying is that I read literally ONLY the shit ones? Because it's beginning to look like that.
>>52051
>Some Katie Cassidy stuff leaked a few weeks ago. Maybe "recent" was a bad word choice
Nice
We've also got Luke Cage Noir to do, but I'll probably save that for much later. If memory serves, it's not as shit.
>>52100
>So what you're saying is that I read literally ONLY the shit ones? Because it's beginning to look like that.
Not at all.
>>52051
I bet if it was the woman playing the sister, we ALL would've heard about it. Before I gave up on Arrow, I remember the threads loving her.
I've worked at restaurants. We straight up wouldn't be allowed to keep tips that big. I've actually seen the customer argue with the manager over "No, I meant to give them a tip that big." over a lot smaller than a hundred.
>>51896
Would explain why Bendis's Luke feels so strange.
God damn it Luke, never smile again!
>>52367
You thought he was just a shitty writer, but he was going off poor source material!As well as being a shitty writer.
>>52232
I swear to god Arrow ia actually good this season. Somehow LoT and Arrow stole some of the fun/storytelling from Flash this year.
Sara (the sister) is still on LoT, but most of the comments about her in the threads are now people complaining that she's mostly depicted as a lesbian in that show now (not bi).
>when people say CAGE isn't great
wtf
>>52475
I saw someone say that the Legion of Doom was in LoT. Were they lying, or is that legit?
>>52319
Well I mean, did you give the tipper any useful information about the local underworld?
We're talking a lot of trash about this, but I kinda like how it's keeping the Noir style of the older comics, and Luke acting like he's a hard case when he's a soft touch for a sad story.
>>52557
I meant Genndy not MAX!
waah waaaaaaaaaah
Wait, is Luke taking the piss, or does he actually smelling money?
>>50888
A cruel trick!
And, sadly, rather than read along with Edgy Comics: Negro Edition, I think I'm gonna end up going to bed, because I'm already falling asleep.
Somewhere, Bendis has an erection, and doesn't know why.
>>52597
>An' since when did "legitimate businessmen" an' Five-Oh make nice?\
Since "legitimate businessmen" pay better than your tax dollars.
>>52557
>>52634
Oh yeah, Gendy's Cage is fucking great, it's Azzarello's that isn't.
>>52697
Just keep the window open, and hope /cock/ is still in the servers come tomorrow.
If /co/ isn't back by then, I'll do Noir instead of Dark Avengers.
What the hell is that expression in the sixth panel, besides Bueno in his better looking years?
>>51230
A dick? In a MAX comic? Unpossible!
No wait, the other thing. Obvious and unvarying.Every attempt to make Cage hipper just makes him more racist than he originally was.
Speaking of the old comics, what I really miss about modern Cage? Old Luke's emotional nature. I miss seeing Luke Cage beat the hell out of people while smack talking them, and I miss how angry he got.
>>51698
>Uncharitable landlord
Bring back DW consarnit!
>>52915
>A dick? In a MAX comic? Unpossible!
Is it sad that I had to think "Wait, does he mean a metaphorical dick, or an actual penis?"
>>52597
I skipped season 1 of LoT, and two has been really fun. It it terrible at everything related to history, but manages to have good setpieces and villains.
Yes, the villains for the season ARE the Legion of Doom (the heroes even call them that, based off "an old cartoon" one of them used to watch). Thawne, Damian Darkh, and Malcolm are the reoccurring villains, and the dome base appeared last episode.
https://desu-usergeneratedcontent.xyz/co/image/1490/98/1490988494839.png
>>53018He actually DOES show up again, but not as Luke's best friend, which is a bummer.
Was that shit on the playground supposed to be a "fight"? That looked more like "tossing around small children".
>>53095
Holy hell, that's amazing.
God damn, I hate how this guy draws teeth. They're unsettling.
This guy's head is so long, he looks like he Quitely's Cyclops.
It looks like that's just most white guys now.
Oh joy, time for flashbacks.
>>52319
I think a lot of bars would not even necessarily take hundreds, period, because of forgeries.
>>53246
The overall plot has been: The Legends were scattered through time, had to meet up again, ran into the JSA (Commander Steel, Hourman, Stargirl, Obsidian, Doctor Midnite, Vixen), and learned that Rip Hunter (who was MIA) broke up a superweapon and scattered it through time, protected by various members of the JSA.
The SuperWeapon isThe Spear of Destiny, and had to be activated by the blood of Christ. The Legion of Doom is searching for the weapon, andsucceeded in getting it and rewrote reality to be Doomworld in the latest episode.
The season finale is next week
Did he just make a gap in his pants just to hold his gun easier? Fucking hell, get a holster.
Seriously, I hate this guy's damn teeth.
>>52475
>I swear to god Arrow ia actually good this season
Yeah, it's entirely watchable. All credit to the Burg Dog taking screen time away from Felicity, and Prometheus being the best Secret Villain since Wellsobard.
Did we REALLY need a beat panel for "Luke stares a guy down"?
>>53507
They make markers to detect forgeries now, so that's hardly a problem.
>>53656
Curtis still fucking sucks unfortunately, but yeah, the villain has been A+ this year
>>52597
>I saw someone say that the Legion of Doom was in LoT. Were they lying, or is that legit?
A version of the Legion of Doom is happening, yes.
They are hammy, catty villains and it's hilarious. Vastly better executed than Valium Savage.
>>52742
Bendis: Probably actually depraved enough to pay for Blacked.com.
Was he called Hammer because he got smacked in the head with one a few times? Because god damn, he ugly.
>>53537
That sounds comic book as fuck, I've gotta see it later.
How often do you think we'll see people talking about Luke Cage's dick in this series?
>>53777
>They are hammy, catty villains and it's hilarious.
It's comic book TV shows. Those are the best kind of villains. It's when they try to play it straight that it gets dull.
>>53867
PAY, or just watch? Because actually paying for porn, regardless of the site, is not only depraved, but dumb too.
>>54086
Sort of depends on the context, for instance, most of the charm of the Adam West era Batman show was Batman's character playing it almost completely straight.
>>53186
>Luke is a sneakerhead
This could have been prevented. Things didn't have to go this wrong.
Yeah, you're an idiot if you thought that would work.
I like Parker is this fun? I'm going to hop in on the ride
Another cover that looks like it's off a porn.
>that fourth panel
Oh my god, what's wrong with your face!
>>54574
Hot damn, the MAX imprint really was terrible wasn't it? Were they trying to chase "Vertigo" while at the same time not realising that Vertigo books were not usually screaming "look, we are for adults!"?
>telling the hero when you first meet him that you're afraid of him
I get that he had a small monologue where he justified that, but seriously, why would you do that?
>>52986
Remember that time he lost his shit over the original Power Man trashing a theater while a girl was still inside?
So does he give this speech to everyone that works for him, you think?
>>53115
The Gem was a great secret hideout.
>>54260
He was played straight, but then he'd do shit like get into a surfing contest with the Joker, or run through town carrying an oversized cartoon-looking bomb over his head, or whatever weird shit happened per episode.
>>53309
I like it. Mostly because I'm pretty sure he's doing it on purpose.
>>53869
If Luke isn't taking this money to give to the mom, fuck Azzerrelo forever for getting that far off character.
>>54381
I'm so sorry, Anon. I really am. Parker's Thunderbolts really IS good, but this is just a cruel prank because I thought I was funny.
>>54963
Yeah, but what made it funny wasn't the fact that weird shit was happening. It was that Batman treated it like business as usual.
>>54282
I remember back when Luke's hobby was watching western movies. Shame nobody remembers that.
>>55154
Was it a hobby, or was it all they played at the gem?
>a woman already trying to fuck Luke
It's like we're reading Bendis all over again!
You say mods don't care about nudity? I guess we'll find out.
>>54728
>those lovingly detailed pock marks
Corben was wasted on this.
>>54783
You have no idea, Anon.
>>54728
Jesus christ. He looks like someone out of One Piece.
In a bad way! Oda draws weirdos like that intentionally freaky, not as a side effect of art style and shitty rap fashions converging on bad anatomy.
>>54863
I remember him beating him up and threatening to feed him a folding chair, yes.
>>55020
You're more optimistic than me, Anon.
>>55444
Luke, what expression is that face meant to convey?
>>55229
Part of it was that it was all they played at the Gem, but he seemed to genuinely like them too.
>>55028She never comes up again.
Just look at this shiteating grin.
>>55169
>Hell, Bendis may go so far as to COMMISSION internet porn.
That's some heresy right there.
>>54783
MAX was All Edge, All The Time.
Just so desperate to prove how not for kids they were that they made things as violent/sexual/racially charged as possible.
The HBO Nudity of comic books.
>>55229
Both, actually. There was a bit where he and Danny were on a train guarding something, and he was shown reading a western book.
It was a hobby you wouldn't expect from what began as an exploitation character, and it was great.
>>55397
Thing is, One Piece is fairly cartoony so exaggerated designs look natural in it.
>>55314
What has he been on that was good, Anon?
>>55759
It also kinda works because spaghetti westerns are also pretty 70's.
>>55397
What's that? More horrifying faces? Can do!
>>55038
Panel 3: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fYse1oIWV4
>>55512
I can only assume "mild bemusement".
Luke, it doesn't look like he's getting back up.
>>55815
Heavy Metal and Hellboy: The Crooked Man.
Okay, now he's DEFINITELY not getting up.
"Gee Tombstone, how come your mom lets you have TWO sub-machine guns?"
>>56090
A man's forehead and chin should not be fucking parallel to each other.
Luke's getting a lot of money in this mini, and it all seems to be going to himself. This is NOT our Luke Cage.
>>56144
"Fear"
What a surprise, for once it's a cover that wouldn't be surprising on a porn book.
>>56207
I also remember the time he fought Unus the Untouchable for a handful of change from a kid's pocket.
I skipped the "Call of Duty: The Brotherhood" preview that was in the end of Cage #3.
>>55769
And the world of One Piece is so full of weirdness bizarre character designs need to work hard to stand out alongside the 12 foot versions of old actors, weird animal people, and bobbleheaded transvestites.
>>56026
It's always weird seeing Hellboy drawn by someone besides Mignola.
>>55853
The Gem was mostly second run stuff, old John Fords and that generation of films.
I GET IT, SHE THINKS LUKE IS HOT! MOVE ON!
>>56321
That's the Luke I like. As the new Power Man said in Shadowland, he takes money so the client knows he works for them, and not some higher calling.
It's why stuff like this and the 90's Cage, where he's all about getting paid rubs me the wrong way.
>>56273
You're just not reading the right porn books.
>>56370
Sad thing is, I haven't read One Piece in years, so while I don't RECOGNIZE all of that weird shit, I can't quite say if you're lying about it all.
Damn it Luke, stop smiling!
>>56540
Well porn books can have ANY cover, I'm just saying that one you wouldn't EXPECT to be on a porn cover, you know?
>>55952
Looks like he's been doing it again here.
>>56661
We've just moved from regular porn to bondage porn.
Why is the boss out back cutting the meat himself? Isn't that for the help?
>Luke continues to try and squeeze money out of rival gangsters for his own gain
>>56728
Bondage porn, or prison exploitation porn? They don't have to be the same thing, you know.
The joke is "goes into your fucking chest."
It's sadly probably the best writing this book has displayed so far.
>>56821
>You see, this is more realistic, because what kind of nigger operates at cost?
This is just making him come across as scummy, where as the original series basically set him up as a PI with an invulnerability cheat code on.
Do the sound effects NEED to be this big?
>>56864
But why can't we have it both ways?
Our heroes, ladies and gentlemen. Sets up a three-way gang war, and just walks away to let it get sorted out on its own.
>all these mentions of Luke being bulletproof
>>56960
>a PI with an invulnerability cheat code on.
That's a really good way of describing classic Luke. I think I'll use that from now on.
Why do so many guys in this book look ugly as hell?
>>56986
Because that's just TOO kinky, Anon.
>>57279
Because Corben is a fantasy/horror artist that somehow got stuck doing a street level book and needs some kind of outlet.
And in case you couldn't figure it out by now, THIS is where you know Luke doesn't have steel hard skin we're familiar with, because he's bleeding so easily. Meaning he could've died at the first issue if those idiots at the basketball court called his bluff.
THAT was one hell of an ass kicking.
And this here's another difference. This version of Luke set up the hit on Styker himself...
>>57279
Christ, Man Mountain Marko, what have they done to you?
... It ended the same way it did in 616 though. Funny story, while getting all the comics for these storytimes, I used wikis to get some of them. At least one of them thought this was bit was canon.
>>57008
Didn't this whole thing START because some poor kid got hit by a damn stray bullet?
So, now he's causing MORE stray bullets to be everywhere?
I was defending this crap, no more. God damn.
Last issue for the night, Anons!
>>57344
>>57473
I THOUGHT he looked a bit like Anton Arcane.
The fuck is this? If you're trying to hang him, I think you're doing it wrong!
>>57527
Yeah, they kind of forgot about that thing with the mom and her dead daughter.
Remember, despite the do-rag, Luke clearly has hair. So why Bendis decided that Luke shaves his hair, I'll never know.
>"So I guess you're not bulletproof, huh?"
This clearly isn't a world with superhumans, why would you think he was?
>>57689
That's some quality writing then. Starting a story and abandoning that premise entirely.
>"Tombstone was lookin' to hand me a beatdown. He woulda capped you if I didn' take it."
So apparently he took that massive beating on purpose, assuming he's not covering his ass here.
>>57784
She seemed to just be the way of getting to the point where Luke Cage starts a war between two gangs, but yeah, there had to be better ways. Maybe one of the lower members fucks with him personally, or something.
>a random chain around Luke Cage's neck
Damn it, you're supposed to be using it as a belt!
So what, they're only doing this because they want the other guy taken care of? That's a shitty reason and you know it.
>>57899
Who's to say he isn't, David Carradine style?
Yeah Luke, look at that photo of the little girl one more time. It's not like that shoot out last issue didn't make a few more of her.
Marko, seriously, get a dentist.
I know I compared him to Arcane, but you know, at least he had the excuse of literally being corpses strewn together like Frankenstein.
Huh, looks like he could've taken Marko after all.
>>57946
Because we see here that it's only around his neck? I guess so it's easier to reach it and strangle his enemies, but still.
Well shit, that fight didn't last long.
>>58064
>Hey you gu-uuys!
>>58028
Man, he needs a entire team of medical specialists.
Man, after sitting in some Samurai Jack threads, and seeing entire chain posts of insults with the Scottsman, anything less just seems mundane, especially when they try to make them long like this.
>>58103
Motherfucker you do not get to bring that out after starting up a 3 way fucking gang banger shoot out.
You don't. Dozens of Hope Dickenses were probably caught in the crossfire of that bullshit.
The fuck? That idiot's still around?
>it's a story where the bad guy's plan is gentrification
oh good, ive never seen that before
WHERE THE FUCK DID THIS IDIOT GET THAT MUCH DYNAMITE?!
>>58198
But at least it CAN be done, especially with modern medical science.
>>58234
Given this page, I'm assuming the "job" isn't Hope anymore, although the fact that he hasn't actually forgotten about her is surprising, to say the least.
>>58254
The hell did he find a box of dynamite?
That's it for tonight, Anons.
Now, as for that surprise? I FINALLY made a Mega. It took a few days because my network is abysmally slow, but I've finally everything we've read up until now (yes, even Cage MAX) onto it.
>https://mega.nz/fm/sqQlkBTJ
Let me know if there's any problems with the files (because a few times the connection got interrupted), and I'll try and upload them properly.
See you tomorrow, where we hopefully get to read Jeff Parker's Thunderbolts.
>>58459
Well, that was terrible.
Anyone who ever paid money for it deserve to be beat until they look like Marko.
>>58530
>Anyone who ever paid money for it deserve to be beat until they look like Marko.
Hey now, that's a bit much, don't you think?
>>58530
They were punished by having to read it.
>>50790
Bump. I hope this thread will be archived correctly.
I hope we don't lose this thread.
>>50790
Hehe, cause he's dark.