Champions Story Time

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>>94364762
Look at these beauties.
Your new favorites.

>>94364762
>Because I demanded it!
You should start treating yourself better OP, people care about you.

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>>94364792
Recap

I just hate the art so much.

I think I could tolerate the hamfisted political bullshit if I didn't hate the art so much

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>>94364818
Remember that time Vegas was kill?

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>>94364853
Comic Book Exposition.
Introducing you to incredibly stupid backstories since 1938.

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>>94364906
FUCK DRUMPF!!!!
!

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>>94364932
Why would cars explode from rubble falling on them?

>>94364792
It took them this long to finally show up. All that's missing is Moon Girl.

>>94364792
>Your new favorites.

Said no-one, ever.

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>>94364964
Totes Halk.
HE DO IT!

>>94364964
Comicbook Logic probably

>>94364762

I think Champions is the sevond worse ongoing I've ever read, beaten only by America Chavez.

Marvel is trash.

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>>94365036
Everyone's dead.
This makes Hulk worse than Hitler.

>>94364792
So what's going to happen to the new falcon since Sam is switching back?

>>94364932

Will Hydra deport this new Falcon for us all?

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>>94365076
This is how planes work.

>>94365101
Good question.
Sam also has a new sidekick (Rayshaun).

NuFalcon is screwed.

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>>94365116
They say cooked human flesh smells like pork.
Delicious infidel meat.

>>94365139
Why can't marvel bring Elijah back?

>>94364762
Oh man, guest-starring some of my favorite exciting new characters like RIRI WILLIAMS: IRONHEART and THE PATRIOT II

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>>94365149
Remember last issue when people in concentration camps decided staying was better than running away?
Boy, if they weren't surely dead by this point, they would feel stupid.

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>>94365196
Why would Miles have more experience than Patriot?
Or is this a different Patriot?

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>>94365229
More dead people.
Secret Empire is a good event.

>>94365229
It's not Elijah it's some new kid who Tony made a suit for

>>94365229
>Or is this a different Patriot?
Different one i think.

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>>94365280
I hate this issue.
I hate this comic.

>>94364792
Holy FUCK those legs. Did Groot draw this comc?

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>>94365330
>>94365284
Why would anyone take a clearly Captain America inspired identity in a world where Cap is a fascist dictator?
Is the next Marvel Hero Fuhrer Jr.?

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>>94365376
#resist

>>94364762
>>94365076
>>94365149
>>94365330
How much you want to bet Dr Doom is in the distance crying?

>>94365330
You can still stop this OP

Don't do this to yourself

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>>94365404
I regret doing this to myself

>>94365330
I remember a time I didn't dislike Ramos's art

>>94364932

Mexico is a democratic republic with gay marriage? Since when is it a Tyranny?

>>94365446

This is more unhealthy than cutting yourself, anon.

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>>94365446
Viv makes that face all the time.
You can't say she is making a face when she makes the face she is always making.

>>94365330
>EVERYONE IS ON THE INTERNET AND CELLPHONE
>WE ARE BECOMING MACHINES
Then why don't you stop being a bitch and delete your twitter, Waid. Maybe you'll get more work done.

>>94365196
>>94365229
Uh, anon, you skipped the white privilege pages

look at the file names

>>94365376
Does Ramos have a fetish for women with big teeth?

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>>94365505
#punchnazis
#subtlety
#letmedie

>>94365553
This.

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>>94365196
>>94365553
It is amazing how little this adds to the "story:

>>94365404
>>94365446
My God! How Subtle! I wonder who they could be talking about??!!!

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>>94365622
No, Spider-men will be the first to go.
DAY OF THE WEB

HOPE YOU ARE HAPPY FOR MAKING ME POST THIS PART.

>>94365659
I mean, relatively, this is nowhere near as heavy handed as the original Secret Empire storyline that ended with Richard Nixon killing himself.

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>>94365582
Letters from the fans.

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>>94365404
>We don't have to adapt to D̶R̶U̶M̶P̶F̶ taking over our country.

>>94365505
It's a Christmas Miracle!

>>94365662
Mark Web should never write teenagers.
And above all, never let him write teenagers of color.

>>94365622
>>94365662
it's as if i can feel my white privilege burning me down into my very bowels....that or this book is just giving the raging shits, more so than usual.

>>94365582
>Think of the Children!
>Yes we can
This comic is too easy for shitposting.

>>94365722
>web
Dammit, Waid.

>>94365662

I'm not even white and I hate everything about this page.

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>>94365689
The average human mouth has 32 teeth.
The average human tooth is not the size of their fist.

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>>94365419
This is the second worst event in Marvel history.

>>94365689
These fan pages have yet to persuade me into believing that any of these people are real.

>>94365376
He was inspired by Sam Wilson, hence why his Patriot-suit looks like FalCap's.

>>94364762
>hate reading

I will never understand why you faggots love to do this to yourselves

>>94365932
getting angry reminds me that i still care about comics...even if they are capeshit

>>94365622
>>94365662
This is terrible.

>>94365890
Didn't he throw a Molotov at a bank?

>>94365582
Miles could have ended the event alone if NAdia didn't go all "don't sink to that level MIles!!!"

>>94364762
I read Avengers #10 and thought it was decent and then I read this and I wonder how it's possible for there to be such a gulf in quality between what Waid writes

>>94366096
If you kill literally figurative Hitler, you become him!

>>94366127
That's why the Allies had to wait for Hitler to kill himself, because if anyone else did there'd be another World War

>>94365330
>My new friends and me
This wouldn't annoy me if Nadia wasn't supposed to be a 'smart' character

>>94365622
>Waid writing Riri as a total cunt
Okay, sometimes he gets things right. Blind squirrel, nut, etc.

>>94364932
Someone should tell Mark Waid that while Mexico is pure shit its not really a tyranny at all, if anything the people that are escaping from it are from South America.

>>94365101
Also, where the hell has he been since he bailed in the name of revenge after Rage died just prior to SE?

>>94366843

?? It's explained in his book, he's been underground railroading people into canada

>>94366874
No, I mean NuFalcon.

>>94366887

my bad!

>>94365419
That reminds me, where is Doom?
He was running around as Ironman before this, so shouldn't he be somewhere?

>>94367543
I think the other writers all kind of just try and ignore Bendis as much as they can get away with

>>94365689
I NEED PICTURES OF THAT VIV COSPLAY STAT!

>>94364762

I think I dislike this guys art more here than in Lemires X Men (even though that book managed to be worse than this one)

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>>94364762
>>94364792
I know that this new Falcon's costume is a tribute to Sam's 1st version. But what is up with current Marvel's diversity straight up ripping off the old MC2???

>>94365330
>tying to work out the pym family tree
At least she's not dating Cyclops, then it would really get messy.

>>94365789

Why are they so obsessed with fucking Twitter?

>>94365116
Who is Patriot? I don't recall seeing him before.

>>94365330
How is Ultron "a robot" but Viv and her family not? Is this some coping mechanism on her part to deal with being related to evil grampy Ultron?

>>94367942
Vision and his family are "androids," e.g they are biological-ish but built from synthetic organs. Ultron is a more traditional robot.

>>94365404
Hydra blowing things up is just part and parcel of modern, multicultural life.

>>94367853
He debut as a civilian in Secret Empire being rescued by the Champions. He didn't done the costume until SE:Brave New World

>>94367989
Sounds like a racist distinction to me!

Probably the worst issue of Champions yet. This book has no business being this bad, but Waid and Ramos have to keep outdoing themselves.

>>94365116
ofc all the black kids have to work together
bravo waid you racist shitlord

>Patriot: Stark gave me the suit
>Riri: OH, REALLY?
>P.: Yeah, something wrong, lady?
>R.: OH, I DUNNO, WHY DON'T YOU TELL ME?!
>Miles: Uh, guys, what's the problem?
>P.: white privilege

Even with the missing pages, I still feel like I'm missing something.

>>94371383
Riri is mad because she stole Tony Stark's shit fair and square and how's he gone and given this kid a super suit for free???

>>94368107
Also, he blew up a bank in an act of domestic terrorism after Rage got himself found guilty of a robbery he didn't commit.

>>94371435
I can actually see this happening, but I just don't get where W-P fits into all this.

>>94371383
Because it makes Riri even more useless if people are just being given Stark Tech.

thanks OP

>>94365662
thanks for the effort with the storytime.
I thank no one for the quality of this issue. holy god that was terrible. I think it's in the running for being as bad as issue #1

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>>94365622
Sometime, I wonder how hydra treats white people... Will they make them higher class civilians?

Why does it feel like a series of Jack Chick strips if JC was obsessed with SJW ideology rather than Christianity?

>>94364964
To be fair, this is a rare moment in comic when supposed genius acts like a genius. On the other hand, it's boring as fuck and I'd wish Waid to stop.

>>94365076

Bruce would have done it.

>>94364853
>Remember that time Vegas was kill?
Invincible did it! Invincible did it!

>>94373190
No. Everybody is equal under Hydra.

Cap purged the nazi ideologies Strucker brought with himself.

They have problems only with people wrecking Order, which is mostly super-powered people.

>>94364792
Whoever drew those legs needs to go back to art school.

>>94365662
So this guy moans about white privilege just after saying stark game him a bunch of tech for free, which he then lost.
He's become "gibs me dat" the character!

>>94365622
>>94365662

Wow, what a bunch of self centered pieces of shit.

>>94367590
Seeing how Bendis is the most spoiled brat next to Slott, hard not to see why the other writers ignore them.

>>94371383
>>94371572
INTERNALIZED WHITE PRIVILEGE!

>>94365662
Okay, i totally understand they are pushing Miles as he was a better leader than Kamala and teenclops.

But, as much complaining as people have about Ramos, everyone agree he's of better use when the story have some action. This issue would be less boring with other artist.

>>94365229
>>94365622
wait, what the fuck? his shield is right there on the other page

>>94364762
refresh my memory, where is Nova during SE?

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>>94365582
remember when Morrison wrote a story like this, and it was a 10/10 issue?

>>94365689
>that /cgl/
I would

So... So...
Champions:
- Patriot - Black (Where is Elijah? Where is? Why?)
- Hulk - Asian
- Falcon - Furry spic
- Viv - "I should try a different gender" / "A microaggression"
- Wasp - Violent womyn Slav
- Spiderman - Half Black / Half Mexican / Half Bendis' erotic dream
- Ironheart - Black STEMmed womyn (why isn't japanese?)

-----

On the other side:
- Stupid sexy nazi Capitan America - Third generation irish
- Odison - BLONDE WHITE GERMANIC BIG GUY.
- Scarlet Witch - Gyspy, possessed by a white demon
- Vision - Hacked by the Nazi
- Taskmaster - Cis white scum mercenary
- Antman - Black Ant - Cis white scum mercenary plus cultural appropiation
- Deadpool - Sad pansexual mutie, because he had to work with evil nazi big guys.

Whoah... God blessed us

>>94374821
don't forget Superior Octopus - Cos white scum who thinks he's smarter and better than everyone else (White Privilege)

>>94365404
Los Angeles would probably be relatively safe since Steve banished all the muties to California and made it their own country.

>>94373520
Well yea. Bruce would have waded into the fire and plugged up the source. I think he did something like that a couple of times.

>>94371503
So its not actually the Patriot descended from the first Super Solider?

>>94374891
man, that sounds really smart. Too bad Cho isn't a character that can do a lot of complicated mental math to know how to disrupt the wreckage just enough to clog the source without causing a collapse and then need to eat a candy bar to recharge

>>94374914
nope, he's in legal limbo
Marvel wants to represent everyone as long as you don't ask for your fair share

>>94374925
Nah he's a Hulk now. Just a Smart Hulk

>>94366119
Huh. My impression was the opposite. Ditto the art.

>>94364762
WHERE'S GWENPOOL?

>>94374925
Blame Waid for not knowing anything about these characters other than what colour they are.

>>94365582
>we saved one baby
>MISSION ACCOMPLISHED :)

What an incompetent group of idiots.

>>94365789

An anon should do a coded tweet where it's obvious that it's a shitpost so it can be pointed out.

>>94365662
as a non american, how does the left reconcile white privilege with the Great Depression and the Dust Bowl?

>>94367787
The Maker has hinted at Wasp being the key to some master plan WHISPER has at some point.

This will probably come into play later.

>>94365662
correct me if Im wrong, but doesnt Hydra doctrine prize strength above such petty factors such as race or gender?

I was fairly sure they were a multi national secret organization made up of all types of people, hence their narrative usefulness. you can never tell who is or isnt hydra.

how in fuck does that represent white privilege?

>>94375906
yep. nevermind that Hydra likely employed an EMP in the first seconds of the attack to cripple emergency responce and cell traffic. nevermind that cellphones require towers. disregard the fact that four or five people are hideously inefficient as a search force for an area this size. pay no heed to the fact that aluminum stops microwaves.

the writer for this shit needs to be fired

>>94364932
Why do people act like Mexico is some kind of hell on Earth type place where people runaway from?
As a BR, I'm shocked at how americans fetishize their migrants. I had a friend that took a 9 thousand dollar loan from me to get herself a baby (since she was a lesbian), the proccedure failed and instead of paying me, she build a home theater set up on her house complete with a projector.

Then she went to the US and cooks buffet style dishes for a living, the area I work on, and she has the audacity to ask muh mother (it's a family business) tips with cooking.

>>94374705
is this when they find Lorna nude and crazy buiding a Magneto statue with metal scraps?

>>94375947
They don't even try.

>>94374044
So, technically, Hydra now exists to fight the ubermensch, the mutants, the inhumans, the heretics that refuse to except hydra history and all those that would spread disorder and inequality?

I'm suprised that no comic book people are calling Hydra communists.

>>94376321

Don't worry Waid, I appreciate that they saved... a baby! It's the small wins that matter! At least we got to know about robots and white privilege!

>>94375947
The what? Is that some kind of sports thing? And we talk about wall street bankers and the 1% screwing us over all the time it's not just during the recession it's still happening even today

>>94364932
fuck off ..... green winged Faggot ..MEXICAN here the ones that leaf Mexico are the ones that suck being mexicans they dont like to struggle to get a better job so they go to the US ..because they like the easy life that you MURICAN offer them ... and the majority of them forget about their families ..... SO FUCK IMMIGRANTS EVEN THE POPULATION IN MEXICO DONT WANT THEM BACK

>>94376903
>leaf
LEAVE

So how long until Hydra introduces their RAISE ACT? Or are they just not that evil?

>>94364932
I never realized the Mexican government was so tyrannical.

>>94364964
There were definitely survivors seen earlier or in Secret Empire. How can there not even been any birds around?

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>>94376871
>The what? Is that some kind of sports thing?

>book is literally just every teen minority legacy hero all shoved into the same issue
>ghost driver doesn't show up
Why is he conspicuously absent from everything involving Marvel's legacy push? I mean I'm thankful Waid didn't ruin him, but still.

this is so bad it's actually offensive

>>94377652
He was conspicuosly absent from his own damn book. Marvel has some weird memory lapse when it comes to Robbie, he's probably too cool for the huggy feel good tripe they're trying to push like wasp and hellcat.

>>94378523
>murders human traffickers
>sucks out people's souls
>literally send people to hell
>has genuine social problems like having to participate in illegal street racing to raise his mentally handicapped brother in a parent absent house

Robbie is basically too real to exist in modern Marvel's catalog. Which I guess makes sense since he's basically a west coast flavoured reimagining of Black Suit Spiderman/Venom right down to the visual design. If he showed up in Champions he'd just kill everybody.

>>94374821
>- Stupid sexy nazi Capitan America - Third generation irish
SECOND Gen Irish

>>94376668
yeah

>>94379144
Okay, I'm interested enough in Robbie now--where should I start if I want to read about him?

>>94380618
>All-new Ghost Rider 1-12
>Ghost Racers 1-5
>Ghost Rider (Marvel NOW 2.0) 1-5
In that order.

>>94380654
Tx amigo

>>94374705
> and it was a 10/10 issue?
>things that never happened

>>94365662

If this Patriot is Elijah, then that is the worst shit, Waid. Elijah ain't no punk like that.

>>94365552
>Then why don't you stop being a bitch and delete your twitter, Waid.

He did delete his twitter back in April, you're really behind on the news, slowpoke.

>>94382120
Probably mistook him for Kurt Busiek.

It happens all the time.

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God I miss Eli

>>94380679
Be warned, his second run is mostly a NFF/CoF stealth mini and Robbie himself is barely in it. Only the first issue is worth reading for the backup with based Tradd Moore back on art.

He was also in the Secret Love one shot, but that hardly counts.

>>94375947
Oh, what, you think all the indians in the area weren't hurt 10x more by the dust bowl? You don't think the Depression hurt black people more, on average, than white people? Their white misery means nothing when other people have it even worse! They need to accept their privilege and make room for those even worse off!

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For anybody wondering what happened to Eli