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Defeated Iron Man storytime.

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Thread replies: 39
Thread images: 14

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Hey, /co/ Remember how Diversity In Comics kept talking about how he was going to make an Iron Man fanfiction? It came out. Haven't read it yet, so I thought I'd storytime with you all.
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>>94318493
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That's it Unless he makes more. Sooo, what did we learn today?
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Kinda boring and a rehash of everything we already know is a problem without really being funny. Not shocking enough for normies to 'get' it and not subtle enough to really enjoy.
I like D&C but this is just kinda... Meh?
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>>94318661
Got the same feeling. The entire thing reads like a fanfiction some elementary school student wrote about his bully, Todd. Where Todd is totally hated by everyone and my real dad, Piccolo, kills him in the end and makes /him/ sniff farts.
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>>94318514
EXTRA THICC!
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Fuck off with this guy's shit.
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I thought it was kind of funny...
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>>94318965
Don't shoot the messenger anon. I'm a third party observer in this fiasco. I's a good boy! I dindu muffin.
>>94319046
In all fairness. It's not over, that's just the beginning part he released.
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>>94318406
This feels agressively mediocre. Riri seems to be the best part of this, fully embracing the "diversity numarvel kids are all secretly villains in disguise", but even thay wears thin. Tony isn't even a fucking character, he sounds like an old man with back problems for fucks sake. I can't feel sorry for him when he reads like a fucking OC.
That being said, it could have been a LOT worse for a DiC comic. It reminds me strongly of an idea I'm working on for what is best described as a Watchmen version of nuMarvel, centering around an older, somehow even more jaded Not-Miles.
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>>94318406
Pretty bad stuff.
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>>94319394
JackalMakesCloneOfClone.jpeg
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>>94318601
>What did we learn today
That someone needs some anatomy lessons and tried too hard.
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I don't have any opinions on this "Diversity and Comics" guy , mostly because I've been miraculously avoiding his videos , even though they are like 5 of them on my "Recommended" slate

So this is my first exposure to him. AND ITS TERRIBLE.

This is the guy that is suppposedly talks shit about "SJW Marvel" and how to do good diversity , and then does this America-level fanfiction about Riri being a villain, instead on the good diversity he's promised.

If this is a taste of what he says on his videos , then I heard it already.A thousand times.In MUCH better ways.And they're not particularly right either
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>>94318406
Kind of bad, honestly.Its as subtle as a brick(which is mostly part of the appeal of his channel, but whatevs)

The thing that gets me about the channels like this one or Cap'n'Cummings is they only talk about the SJWs , but they gloss their bigger problems like the horrible PR and Marketing, overuse of events , or mediocre editing. Its like they are pushing an agenda in some kind of way.

Also , cant trust Diversity and Comics opinion on anything when he unironically says Gods of Egypt is a good movie.
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>>94322020
this comic wasn't about "good diversity", it was building on the idea of Riri turning into a supervillian, because she wasn't tested by the other heroes, she was just given super hero status because of the color of her skin and the gap between her legs.

I'm not defending the comic as it is, but I felt that needs to be corrected.
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>>94322710
I saw some of his videos right now and yeah , I know now.I guess it was more my expectations when he called it literally PROJECT RIRI-BIRTH

I expected something on the lines of "Here's how I would have done it" and do a good story about how Riri should have appeared in the universe instead of the fanfiction-y idea of "I don't like the character so I'm turning it into a mustache twirling villain ( with some attempts at parody)"
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>>94318406
Dialogue is terrible. Neededto be longer so there was more dialogue between the two.

I love the idea, though and look forward to the final product.
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>>94322020
It wasn't written by him, it was written by a fan and he was the editor so he didn't get sued
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>>94323048
Also, he came up with the story
https://youtu.be/fbWSqS92IPo
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I feel like him making sure the dialogue was made 100% obvious satire kind of killed any impact it could have had.
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Also keep in mind that he had to edit the dialogue to look satirical because the milkshake brigade caught wind of it and were trying to get him sued for it.
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>>94323229
>the milkshake brigade

This sounds like a fun name for a group of pre-pubecesent meta human children that get together at the ice cream shop every day after school where they play at being super heroes, and then use there tiny underdeveloped super powers to solve kid problems, like finding lost dogs or beating up that asshole rich kid from class who's always attacking them with "killer" toys that his legitimate super villain father supplies him with.
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>>94323273
I'd make a shitty CN show out of it and get paid millions.
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The art is really , really , really
fucking bad.This Andrew Parchman guy shouldn't draw a comic again.
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>>94318553
lol
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>>94318406

As far as I know DIC (heh) isn't a writer, but a long-time reader and to some degree a critic. So reading this it's kinda obvious why he's not a writer.

Every time I see a story like this I can't help but think there's lost potential. There's an interesting idea from which all this sprang but it was misused and you end up with this.

Biggest failure I see here is that Riri is blatantly evil. She's not, and it doesn't work in this comic either. If she ruined stark by (what I think is implied to be) a deliberate false rape allegation, well, that just doesn't work. The character that's being satirized was a result of a strong idea of "justice" of a certain trend, and so she'd never do something that blatant. Instead, it would have been best to work from what Riri did in Latveria: through her inexperience as a hero, her youth, and her carelessness, and her desire to be a hero even if she doesn't really know what that means, she keeps fucking things up.

Now I am not a writer either, I'd be better off criticizing the artwork in this comic and say that honestly, black and white would have been better than grey upon grey, but I can't help but think that if you want to go with the route of Riri destroying Stark, it should have been done in such a way that she, through sheer incompetence, destroyed the reputation of his company and subsequently the finances, the stocks, and basically brought economical collapse. And maybe after that, after she gets flak from media and other heroes, she gets pissed and blames Tony for everything, for dragging her into the business of hero-ing while she was still a child and too young and foolish to carry that kind of burden.

But again, I ain't no writer.
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>>94322020
it's satire
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>>94323416
Yeah , no shit Sherlock , it literally says it on the comic.

It doesn't change the fact that I think the satire ( and by that , the comic itself) is not far from Gabby Rivera levels of writing
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>>94323510

>Gabby Riviera levels of writing

Anon no
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>>94318553
this should be the core of the history with at least 4 pages and all the other crap could be told in less pages
4/10 would buy a Funko
Thread posts: 39
Thread images: 14


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