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IT HURTS!! 474: Time

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Thread replies: 77
Thread images: 15

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Today, in the penultimate episode of IT HURTS!!...
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>>92131793
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>>92131800
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>>92131823
almost there
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In other exciting news, a quick running of the numbers indicates that 475 will be ~29 pages long
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>>92131861

It's so weird that we're actually waiting for the final comic and I still have NO fucking idea what is going to happen or how this story is going to end. Not a lot of fiction can do that while still remaining interesting. I'm so excited to see how this will all be concluded.
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>>92131823
Is there something in the background here?
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>>92132013
The bottom panel is definitely a joker like smile. Could that be a glimpse of Harmony. Is the only way to reach Harmony is to have harmony within?
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>>92131793
>>92131835
Update Theme:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kz0Yi4Xe6z8
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>as the saying goes "me so horny"

So is the entire comic up till now just him recounting what has happened?

>>92131835
>gob josef grail

Gob is rich enough to hire other guys to work with him?
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>>92132236
They're his buddies
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>>92132236
Josef is his editorfriend that's been taking a more active role in scriptwriting as the climax approaches.

Grail is his wife who's been pitching in as the updates got longer.

No idea who this new Jay guy is
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>>92131835
Wait. Assuming God didn't mean THE END of the Universe, what if Harmony's at the other end of the universe?
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>>92131835
LETTING THE DAYS GO BY
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>>92131861
I'm really going to miss 4chan: The Comic.
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We /long haul/ now, boys.
still about 8 times faster than Kazerad :^)
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time enough
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Man, when I picked up this comic years ago I did not think it would end up in this place.

Jesus fucking christ, gob.
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>>92131793
>>92131823
>>92131835
Gob, just fyi, there is no friction in space. No reason for his rocket ship asshole to be spewing plasma farts. It isn't like an airplane or car, that has to use energy to not slow down, ships in space only have to use energy to accelerate, and then they can fly at a constant speed in a straight line forever (unless they hit something which is incredibly unlikely)

But then again, maybe Pasq is just an idiot?
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>>92132966
Maybe Pasq IS accelerating
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>>92132976
He cannot be (most likely). if he were accelerating at 1m/s, which is the equivalent of your car, basically
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tdrk8jylbk

And there are 31+ million seconds in a year, which would mean, at 1m/s he would reach the speed of light in a decade.

For reference, our Space Ships accelerate at 10 m/s to escape Earth's Gravity, so if he was accelerating as fast as a standard earth rocket, he would reach the speed of light in a single year.

After 1 million years, if he spent any part of that accelerating in a single direction, he will have reached the speed of light.
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>>92133078
Maybe the end of the universe is just reeeeeaaaaaaaaaaalllllyyyyyyyyy far away
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>>92132966
magnetic nozzle, the thing that seems to be coming out is magnetically confined plasma undergoing fusion
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>>92133115
Yes, I'm sure it is. But that doesn't mean he needs to continue accelerating, he will reach a maximum speed and then just be wasting energy on making his rocket explode.

I mean, I get it, it's a dumb comic about stupid feelings, but things in space don't need to accelerate.
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>>92133141
Maybe the laws of physics don't apply after you get far enough away from any other body in space. Maybe something slightly pushes him back, so he has to keep accelerating.
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>>92132966
>>92132976
>>92133078
>>92133141

I think the best explanation is that Pasqualo is just a really big idiot. Because he always has been.
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>>92133141
If you want to get technical, space isn't actually empty. There is small amounts of hydrogen, helium, radiation and other cosmic rays that would eventually slow you down.

Nothing that would necessitate for you to keep blasting at full thrust, mind you, but still.
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>>92132360
>4chan: The Comic.
How is that so?
I always see this comic get posted and the character constantly getting more and more fucked in the ass forever
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>>92133141
he won't be getting a lot faster from the external universes's perspective after that first 99.9999~% C, but from his own perspective it will look like he'll still speeding up. basically continued acceleration means he gets to benefit from an ever-increasing time dilation effect to make the trip seem shorter than it actually is
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>>92131793
>>92131800
>>92131823
>>92131835

He has become God's dick. Just a majestic mechanical schlong shooting across the stars for eternity.
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the people hung up on "FTL is impossible" in these threads are baffling to me.

dude made a guy shit his entire body out of his asshole and then destroyed a planet with a wave of his hand. what scientific phenomenon was that? what kind of energy was he deploying, how did he contain it within his body, and how did he wield it?

heaven, hell, god and the devil exist in this universe. stop getting caught up on the limitations inherent to our current understanding of physics.
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yeah, he could have been constantly accelerating for those 1 million years, the end of the universe is just that fucking far away that even going as fast as he is it's still taking forever.
maybe he'll reach the end in a Kalpa.
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>>92131835
GoBdamn
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Look at all this crushing loneliness and despair. Its like I'm playing sunless sea again, but in space.
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>>92133967
Sunless sea isn't all that sad. I mean I did do a lot of awesome shit and got a son out of it.
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So we know that what with God and Satan being together in that earlier comic that Pasqualo has got to be getting bamboozled somehow. I think that there is no Harmony, and this is all some ploy to just get rid of him.

My personal crazy theory is that the It Hurts! afterlife is just a big setup to store souls until they get deleted. That's why making it into Heaven is impossible and Hell is so deadly. No one is allowed to stick around forever, but either out of being some kind of inherent anomaly or out of his father's work, Pasqualo is the one exception to that. So God and Satan worked together to trick him into picking a direction and flying into it forever.
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>>92134001
Not sad per se, but it definitely makes me feel alone whenever I'm sailing around between island, especially if oceana lonissima starts playing. Fuck I can't wait for sunless skies.
And shit, can't believe we're this close to the ending of It Hurts!! Gob, if you're reading this, I just want you to know that you've absolutely fucking blew my mind yet again with todays update.
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>>92131978
I have no idea how it's gonna wrap up in just 29 pages but I have faith in Gob
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>>92134167

That sounds plausible.
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>>92133339
Yep! Alpha go. Confirmative. He just likes the shiny lights blasting out his rear.
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>>92132278
>Grail is his wife

Never knew Gob was married
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>tfw Ally, Katie, and every other person Pasq knows has probably died in Hell by now, not knowing where he went and waiting for his return for thousands of years
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>>92133967
>>92134001
>>92134171
I found Sunless Sea to be appropriately spooky, but not sad. Travelling on the Zee I usually felt less scared and more stressed that if I looked away for too long then I head right into one of the stronger monsters, or a whirlpool if I were in an uncharted area, and killed super-fast.

The game does have great atmosphere, but until you upgrade to one of the best engines is just takes too damn long to get anywhere.
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>>92134243
I think he was engaged back in 2013. Katie is supposedly based on her.
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>>92134254
>died in hell

???
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>>92134335
erased through hellfire.
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>>92134335
>>92134369
or other deathy ways. The problem with naming deadly things in Hell is that nobody remembers anyone dying from them.
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good fucking god
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Pasq... had a hard life.
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>>92131793
>>92131800
>>92131823
>>92131835
This is easily the most unpredictable story I've ever read.

Faces have been punched off, frogs have been murdered, hotdogs eating contests have been planned, the world ended from a singing talent, teddy grams were mass produced to be a world bomb, fast food burgers have been debated, space rhinos hated turtles, we've been from hell to heaven and across the English speaking universe
And every time you think you're ready, you aren't.

Good God, Gob. How did we get to here from a story about a kid with a dead fish.
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>>92133967
>>92134001
>>92134315

Holy Shit, that game was boring as hell.
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>>92133929
What is this character from?
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>>92136010
Looks like Luca from Monster Girl Quest
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>>92134254
For some reason I feel that their memory were probably erased the second Pasq left hell.
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>>92133078
this
>>92133479

also accelerating when you're that close to the speed of light takes massive amounts of energy, so his rate of acceleration wouldn't be constant anyway

he could be farting out plasma for decades just to get from 0.99999998 lightspeed to 0.999999999 lightspeed
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>>92135740
and a harder afterlife
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>>92134237
Gob, brother, I have an idea for a guest comic, but I think at this point it would be jarring to fill the time in between with something silly I have in mind. It all comes down to you, though, it's your site.
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>>92136509
>he could be farting out plasma for decades
The timejump DOES say "a million years" later, so it's not outside the realm of possibility.
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>>92137068
Shoot me an email budbud :)
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>>92132013
>>92132132
I definitely found a mouth and an eye or two, but it gets hard to interpret.
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>>92138713

At first I thought it was the lunch lady's grody-ass mouth from this comic, but she has way fewer teeth.
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>>92138713
it's that one robotnic connect the dots where you're supposed to make sonic but somebody made robotnic
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Is this the new homestuck
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reminder trisssh is best girl
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>>92139720
canon until proven otherwise
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>>92136666
And it looks like his eternity is going to be not-so-great.
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>>92139738
As long as the final comic is good, not anymore.
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I think this might legitimately be the single best webcomic story to date.

Like you can take or leave the art, though webcomics usually just use good art as distraction from had story. but in terms of actual plot, character depth and dynamic, pathos... I don't think I've ever seen a webcomic pull something this ambitious off with such perfection.

I felt feels, I shat reals, and even if the next comic ends as a dumb joke, I can frankly say that this has been my favorite online reading experience ever. I'm hard pressed to think of anything that comes close.

You did it, gob. You made the best webcomic of all time.
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>>92141669
Oh man thank you so much.

Honestly I couldn't have made this thing without Josef to help me mold and craft the story and Grail to help me make things look cool or pretty.
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So the end of the universe is the end of the comic?

How meta.

In before Pasq just falls off the edge of the comic page after a huge pointless struggle.
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>>92131793
you'd think after a few hundred thousand years and godlike powers he'd create an horrific amalgam of consciousnesses to keep himself company. Or at least give himself an off switch or a sleep timer.
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>>92143247
There's always the slight chance that you could end up being pulled directly into a supermassive black hole if you're not paying attention, I guess
Although I don't think you can actually see black holes until you're directly on top of them anyway so maybe that's a moot point
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>>92141669

Have to agree with this.
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>>92143688
black holes tend to collect shit, there aren't very many just floating freely in space
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>>92141669
Hit the nail right on the head, anon
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>>92141669
I dunno about "of all time", but it helps that it has a beginning, middle and end and hits those beats concisely, as opposed to having to go on every week in a sitcom format like most "professional" webcomics
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>>92150623

Part of me wishes there was more of it, but fuck, I've seen so many good comics ruined by long, meaningless arcs and endless hiatus that yeah, it's absolutely best the way it is.

I think Homestuck could have been the best webcomic, but Hussie really fucked that up in every conceivable way.
Thread posts: 77
Thread images: 15


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