Caleb... what toy is that?

>>91357227
>
Sex toy

It's kind of scary just how perfect they got his "there goes another thing I can't enjoy" face.

>>91357227
>tfw there are parents this retarded IRL
>tfw these crazy controlling fucks are the reason TV and movies are mostly neutered to hell
I hope their children remember how this shit made them feel and grow up to be good parents.

Kaleb probably doesn't have any friends anymore because of his bitch of a mom.

File: tmp_22091-81x6sRmCF8L._SL1500_1187470606.jpg (242KB, 1500x1500px) Image search: [Google]

242KB, 1500x1500px

I am heavy weapons boy and this is my weapon.

>>91357782
THIS PROMOTES WAR JEHOVAH IS SAD

>>91357663
who needs friends when you have jebus

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fnk52bU92oE
Batshit religious cartoon thread?

>>91358401
I think you mean.
>>Oh excellent Caleb! Now you can kill Islam!

>>91357227
Link to this? I remember watching this years ago and I forgot the name of the video.

>>91358494
here you go
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RI0sA6nyQKI

>>91357227
Caleb's mom made the right call.
The last thing tue world needs is more college age beta males whining baout how this just like when Voldemort took over Hogwarts.

>>91358468
You must convince your friend to kill her "parents", sweetie.

>>91357227
bitch i know about Steely Dan you keep in your bottom drawer, and i aint talking about the best band of the 70's and 80's. You dont listen to good music anyway skank.
So what say you let me play with my wizard shit.

File: 4567543.jpg (21KB, 400x387px) Image search: [Google]

21KB, 400x387px

>>91358468
>How to get your kid suspended from public school for harassment

Great advice

>Mfw I was raied JW and my dad burnt all my Hardees smurf plushies because crazy obese cunts at the Kingdom Hall heard from someone that someone heard from someone that 'Smurf' was German for demon and someone's cousin's best friend's door-knocking buddy heard that one blinked it's eyes one time and Satan Satan Satan...

>>91358468
What a shitshow

>>91359230
What happens when you leave? Are you excommunicated?

>>91358468
That animation pretty good, loli's cute.

>>91359230
>tfw mom forced me to stop watching pokemon because she heard from someone who heard from someone that pokemon were demons and they could see the evil spirits around whenever someone watched or played pokemon

>>91358468
This is meant to be the same family, right? Same VA and character names and everything?
So why is she several tones darker?

>>91359230
>crazy obese cunts
I always wonder why the sin of gluttony never gets taken seriously.

>>91359339

Only if you've been baptized, then yeah you're shunned hard by your entire family. They encourage kids to get baptized YOUNG too, like as young as nine. Then when you turn 20 and you realize it's all horseshit too bad you're stuck. Honestly the only thing keeping the JW cult together is that half of the members are being held hostage by the other half. It's pretty fucking sad.

If you never get baptized they'll still hang out with you, unless they're super duper fundie JW's then they might shun you anyway. Fucking INGSOC man. I was lucky though, my dad's the only one in the entire family whose a JW and I never got baptized. I still try to get him to wake the fuck up but cult victims mans... they drink that kool-aid fucking hard.

File: 1475210018614.gif (2MB, 724x698px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 724x698px

I was a JW when this came out and even among people in the religion sparlock was a bit of a joke for awhile. There's a scary amount of people who only stay because they're pretty much being held in at gunpoint.

>>91359439
Your dad's a JW but your mom isn't? I would have thought JWs would be against marrying outside of the religion because it's a huge source of conflict

>>91359500

He started studying and converted after they got married. The strain his ridiculous fucking cult antics have put on our family over the decades cannot be overstated.

File: 1433134225791.jpg (36KB, 482x427px) Image search: [Google]

36KB, 482x427px

>>91359582
I know that feel my man. Being raised in that cult is a pretty big reason I'm the stunted outcast I am today

>>91359500
One of my old friend's parents are the same thing; Mom isn't JW, father is. She seemed rather depressed and withdrawn at all times, and I remember one time when she came over to drop off my friend, she saw that we still had our Christmas tree up from last week, and she sounded SO fucking sad and nostalgic when she said "Oh, a Christmas tree".

>>91359963
>unironically linking reddit
where do you think you are

>>91359191

>How to make your kid "the weird one"

File: IMG_1850.png (291KB, 622x814px) Image search: [Google]

291KB, 622x814px

>>91357227
It's Megatron

>>91357782
>*Touches gun*

File: valley of the drakes.jpg (108KB, 600x800px) Image search: [Google]

108KB, 600x800px

I like toys

File: 98767.jpg (88KB, 848x584px) Image search: [Google]

88KB, 848x584px

>>91360134
>all it takes is one slip in the shower

File: 1428691892120.jpg (86KB, 633x738px) Image search: [Google]

86KB, 633x738px

>>91358468
IS THERE PORN OF THE MOM?

>>91359388
I know that feel, bro

File: 1462200716490.jpg (26KB, 250x355px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 250x355px

>>91360134
>They can spend hundreds [thousands? fuck if I know] on exotic fantasy dildos
>They can't take like 10 minutes to clean their damn shower
Shit's nasty, yo

File: 1389687010078.png (133KB, 260x220px) Image search: [Google]

133KB, 260x220px

>>91358468
>"then Jesus said the same thing!"
>quotes every other line about the bible hating gays but can't quote what Jesus said and where he said it

File: IT'S THAT TIME AGAIN.gif (100KB, 462x239px) Image search: [Google]

100KB, 462x239px

>>91358468
This is pretty based actually. Plebbitors please GTFO, 4chan is a Christian website.

>>91360190
Of course there is.

>>91358468
can we make lesbian loli of this short?

>>91359410
BLEACHED

>>91360240
>4chan is a Christian website
Shit, we better tell that to all those porn boards. They're not being very Christian.

File: C2947WDVIAA1TuO.jpg large.jpg (60KB, 960x720px) Image search: [Google]

60KB, 960x720px

>>91360222
She just said that Jesus said the same thing that the Old Testament said about how a man will cleave to his wife, not that he said some specific anti-gay thing. Also Jesus affirmed the law of Moses and said he came not to do away with the law but not one jot or tittle would pass from the law until heaven and earth passed away.

>>91359191
The mom would just go off on a tangent on how education's bad in Jehova's eyes.

File: fuck not this one mom you fucking whore.png (1MB, 1600x900px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1600x900px

>>91357386
I feel this poor kid so perfectly.

>>91360330
Yes anon, that's why christians can't use mixed fabrics and eat pork
WAITAMINUTE

File: C4P0luvUEAAf-Hj.jpg large.jpg (104KB, 1366x768px) Image search: [Google]

104KB, 1366x768px

>>91360315
The NSFW boards are just containment boards for fedoras, they're 4chan's own version of hell.

>>91357782
Mom made me get rid of mine still got the rocket launcher though

>>91360330
You're using a half quote, anon
>not to do away with the law but to fulfill it
>but to fulfill it
The fulfillment in this case was jesus dying on the cross. It was the "absolute sacrifice" in a sense. All of the laws in the OT about having to sacrifice something after sinning are still in place, but the sacrifice has already been made so you don't have to kill cows anymore
Other laws like the two fabrics one were given to a specific group of people at a specific time, and are not all-applying "if you do this it's a sin" things

File: C4P8EXvUkAAJmHV.jpg large.jpg (137KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

137KB, 1280x720px

>>91360371
Well the law was fulfilled (not the same as being done away with) with Christ's death and resurrection. But everything that was immoral in the OT remained immoral in the NT. The food laws and other purely ceremonial laws were specifically named as no longer needing to be practiced. The prohibition against homosexuality was reaffirmed by Saint Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ.

>>91358723
This fucking mom makes every facial expression like she's a villain.
Wondering if it's on purpose

>>91360519
Don't excuse yourself, cakeboy

>>91360408
>Cigarette
Doesn't that man know know to treat his body as a temple?!?!?!

>>91358468
The most annoying thing about this is how they always say "Jehovah"

This thread is hilarious it's even more funny to me because biggest perverts I know are the sons of preachers

>>91360190
It has to be her being molested by lesbians

>>91357227
>tfw I'm inside a Kingdom Hall right now
It feels weird looking at this thread from here lol.

>>91359230
"Dad why can't we practice a religion that's less of a joke, like Mormonism"
"Dad why didn't you get a real degree and stop telling people engineering makes you a scientist"
"Dad how many doors have you had slammed in your face"
"Dad why are you so fucking fat"

>>91359439
This I'm currently stuck in this situation but I'm not baptized. Family doesn't care though, them and their friends shunned my brother when he got a non Jehovah witnesses girlfriend

>>91360519
>was reaffirmed by Saint Paul, a douchebag who made up a lot of rules no one can quite trace back to Jesus' teachings

>>91360331
Half true. It's highly encouraged to not go to college/university since it takes up a lot of your time and you might fall into temptation by going to college parties or having to learn about evolution.

>>91360615
that's not what that verse means anon

>>91357227
Anybody has that Chick tract D&D one?
Or the Darkseid edits?

>>91357663
>lend toy to Caleb
>His bitch mom just throws it away
FUCK Caleb.

>>91360190
>>91360245
I had it from the last time we had this thread, but lost it with my dead hard drive.

File: sparlock-the-warrior-wizard.jpg (15KB, 637x351px) Image search: [Google]

15KB, 637x351px

would you watch a Sparlock show, /co/?

>>91361335
Hell yeah, Sparlock looks like a badass.

>>91359410

From her picture it's obvious her parents are different races (though she honestly seems too young to reflect the distinction in her art).

>>91359191

Next we need an educational cartoon for parents called "how to homeschool your children to preserve their faith in Jehovah".

Do any of these JW videos cover topics like sex and porn, or do JW just not talk about it in any capacity and shun anything that brings it up?

>>91360175
>oh no I might be penetrated by one of the dozens of expensive dildos I bought and installed in my shower I definitely never intended this to happen

>>91361485
What is there to explain? Sex is just for procreation and has to be done with the lights out, and porn is one of Satan's hobbies

>>91361494
they're meant for decoration, you fucking pervert

>>91361485
Well not a JW but the bible considers sex outside of marriage is awful. The same for adultery. While sex between a married man and woman isn't shameful at all. Porn is awful and the same as having sex outside of marriage because you are lusting after the flesh with your eyes.

>>91360240
>4chan is a Christian website.

nice bait mane

>>91360240
You know the whole "can't show that on a christian imageboard" thing is a joke, right?

File: bad dragon drone delivery.gif (3MB, 300x322px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 300x322px

>>91357227
It's a prison shuttle from the movie Man of Steel, mom.

>>91361646
But what about masturbation without the use of porn?
At what point does sexual attraction outside of marriage become a sin? Is it when you get an erection (which is completely involuntary) or when you act on the erection and masturbate to the thought of whatever got you aroused in the first place?

>>91361335
>sword that can cast spells
>practical shield

Sparlock needs 6 seasons.

>>91361815
Bad.
Any point that you look at another women besides your wife as a object of lust and desire.

>>91358468
I don't get why they compare going to paradise with fucking airport security and did the mom basically convince her daughter to tell her classmates that her parents are going to hell unless they follow jehova?

>>91362024
Are you meant to be sexually attracted to your wife?
If so, how are you meant to know you're sexually attracted to a woman if looking at someone who isn't your wife sexually is bad?

>>91362083
Yes.
There's a different between love and lust. Can you tell the difference?

>>91362179
At what point does sexual attraction become lust?

File: C4IlhzUXUAEkvef.jpg large.jpg (34KB, 720x405px) Image search: [Google]

34KB, 720x405px

>>91360615
Yes, he does. You burn incense in temples.

>>91362202
http://www.ecclesia.org/truth/covet.html
http://www.ecclesia.org/truth/women_sin.html

>>91362318
So what if you're lusting after a fictional character and not a real person?

>>91359410
I heard that they went with a good animator but with a lower then desired budget

That's why she just threw away the wizard toy in the first one and why the animation got so much shittier in that moment. They ran out of money and having the toy go in a bucket is easier

File: demon rasslin.jpg (95KB, 760x638px) Image search: [Google]

95KB, 760x638px

>>91360957
Jesus' own brother (or cousin, by Catholic interpretation) James accepted Paul, Peter who Jesus called the rock upon which his church was built, admitted he was in the wrong and Paul was in the right in his arguments with Paul. The disciples accepted Paul as an apostle. What rules did Paul make up? What he says about gays for example is just reiterating what the Old Testament said, which a Jew like Jesus would have accepted.

File: XZY1k7Z.jpg (74KB, 500x683px) Image search: [Google]

74KB, 500x683px

>it's another fedora-toting "religion is all bad" thread

Excuse me, I do believe you've missed >>>/pol/.

>>91360826
>Taking Satan to their house of worship

YOU FOOL, YOU'VE DOOMED US ALL!

>>91362460
/pol/ is a christian board that makes fun of atheists

>>91360826
>Kingdom Hall right now

A what now? Is there a ton of Jehovahs on 4chan or something?

>>91362508
My guess is it's their word for a church

File: shifty.jpg (135KB, 739x1256px) Image search: [Google]

135KB, 739x1256px

>>91360582

File: Joyce.png (225KB, 529x924px) Image search: [Google]

225KB, 529x924px

>>91362508
Lol there is only one Jehovah, silly anon

>>91362666
trips confirm Caleb's mom is Satan in disguise

The contracted animators knew this was batshit, and the clients were too batshit to notice anything wrong with the clearly evil mom and depressed son.

File: 1407945422048.png (419KB, 900x1018px) Image search: [Google]

419KB, 900x1018px

>>91358468
>That's awesome! Let's practice!

"SO THEN AFTER THAT, YOU CAN SAY HER TWO FAT DYKE MOMS CAN GO TO FUCKING HELL AND BURN FOR ETERNITY FOR ALL YOU CARE, BECAUSE HER FUCKING ACCEPTANCE OF ALL THIS DEGENERATE ACTIVITY IS GOING TO MAKE JESUS COME DOWN TO PUNISH YOU FOR YOUR SHITTY CLAM-LICKING MOMS' SACRILEGIOUS LIFESTYLES!"

>>91358468
But, they're right about homosexuality.

File: sure thing satan.jpg (37KB, 298x288px) Image search: [Google]

37KB, 298x288px

>>91362666
stop fooling around 4chan, get back to work boss

>>91362747

>CAN GO TO FUCKING HELL AND BURN FOR ETERNITY
but the video never implies that. Infact, JWs don't even teach that. That's why they're hated by catholics so much.

>>91360222
Jesus never specifically said rape was wrong either

>>91362774
yeah i know, but it'd just be funny if the mom got really angry when they were practicing and demanded her daughter to just fuck Kari's shit up when she goes to school tomorrow

>>91362774
JWs don't believe in hell?
What happens to the people who don't go to heaven?

>>91362460
I can't believe how thin-skinned zealots can be

>>91358723
>warrior wizard
i'd throw it away too. no child of mine will be a dirty dual-classer.

>>91362083
you'll know who you're sexually attracted to when your dad tells you whose dowry he paid

You know what really pisses me off about this? That wasn't his toy. This bitch threw away SOMEONE ELSE'S PROPERTY. Bet that was a limited edition figure, too. Or what if it was the last toy the other kids dad bought him before he died? Or something the kid spent his entire Summer mowing lawns to save up for? Or that he won in a drawing of thousands of entrants? Cunt.

>>91362891
Wasn't the toy a gift though, not a borrow?

>>91362863

They don't go to heaven either. When you die, you just go in the ground. JWs believe in a resurrection, and for people who are bad, they just don't exist anymore.

It's refreshing compared to more popular religions that talk about infidels who need to be killed, and hellfire for the unbelievers. But people are turned off because of them not accepting blood, and door knocking.

File: japanese messiah folded over 1,000 times.jpg (90KB, 624x416px) Image search: [Google]

90KB, 624x416px

>>91362434
where does isukiri fit into all this?

>>91362949
And don't forget the parts where fun and happiness are banned. Y'know, minor stuff like that.

>>91358468
>"Jehovah wants everyone to be happy!"
>except gays, fuck those gays

>>91362972
It's this the Japanese Raknarok?(made up shit done by Catholic Church to unify religions into itself)

>>91362972
This is just japanese mormonism

>>91362972
Holy shit, did every country just retool Christianity to fit their needs?

>>91362863
The wicked are dead, permanently. Every else will be resurrected at the end of days, most to live on Earth in paradise and exactly 144,000 will live in heaven with God.

>>91363037
Being dead forever doesn't sound so bad
living forever is more scary than that

>>91363037
You do realize that whole "12x12" thing wasn't meant to be taken literally and 12 was originally a number used in tandem with "all" or "everyone". It meant that all could live in paradise for eternity, so long as they followed the teachings.

>>91362989

That's only the more extreme people. Trust me, I grew up in a very religious JW family, and the difference in the generational gap is quite interesting.

File: IMG_2830.jpg (100KB, 739x1300px) Image search: [Google]

100KB, 739x1300px

Have your parents ever banned you from something over religion?

I got verbally lashed over finding porn when I was 14.

>>91363092
So with every generation, people hold less strong convictions because they're all just indoctrinated in it and make compromises due to the fact they never willingly commit to it?

>>91363005
Well the bible said they are like of beast, vile, and abominations. So to hell they go.

>>91360190
Its pretty shitty, it has her pleasuring herself with her son's toy.

>>91363076
Hey, I'm just relating how they interpret it.

>>91363053
I disagree, inexistence sounds extremely terrifying.

>>91363147
you'll understand once you take the nihilistpill

>>91363123
When the fuck did the bible say that, and what bible?

File: homer naked smug stare.jpg (29KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

29KB, 640x480px

>>91358475
>mixing up your Witnesses and your Evangelicals
Dumb faggot.

>>91363147
inexistence is what makes existence meaningful.

>>91358468
So when are they going to make one of these cartoons with the Mom explaining to a hospital-bound Caleb why he won't be getting a blood transfusion?

>>91363120

It's more so that they get a stronger grasp on the scriptures over time, and don't have to think in black and white terms with better clarification.

Kinda like how people thought god hated those who committed suicide, but in recent times it was revealed that God doesn't hold them responsible if they had mental issues that they couldn't control. after all, why would god punish you for something you couldn't handle?

>>91363253
>it was revealed
how exactly? Are you sure it's not just a semantic rationalization that's no more supported than the other view?

>>91359388
To be fair at least a handful of them ARE demons from Japanese mythology. Electabuzz and Golduck/Ludicolo I guess.

>>91363105
pokemon :(

>>91360012
>hurf durf reddit is the MORTAL ENEMY of 4chan
Stop being an underage, it's just a fucking website with a bad UI.

>>91357227
My dick, bitch nigga.

File: 1470967449692.jpg (131KB, 530x578px) Image search: [Google]

131KB, 530x578px

>~12 years ago or so
>I'm a teenager in fuckin' gamestop killing my time while my mom is looking for shoes
>Little old lady comes up asking for advice on a game to get for her 9 year old grandson who has a gamecube
>I look at the shelf and hand her Kirby Air Ride
>She studies it, then appears insulted and puts the game back, claiming that "she can't pick that one, it has magic in it"
>later on I saw her purchase Metroid Prime 2

>>91358813
>The last thing tue world needs is more college age beta males whining baout how this just like when Voldemort took over Hogwarts.
Have you not read the Sparlock comics? The dude was Trump before Trump ran for office.

>>91362460
I do not believe this flag is of a genuine nature.

>>91363105
When I was 12 I looked up naked people on the internet. Not even porn, just nudity (mostly wikipedia articles) because I wanted to know what body parts were meant to look like. Dad found out and gave me a "what you're doing isn't right" talk - completely nonspecific, though now I realize he thought I was jacking off to it as porn. I told him that I was just trying to know more, but he didn't believe me and got mad. I was telling the truth and didn't understand why he didn't believe me, so it ended at a weird stalemate. I didn't get punished and the topic was dropped, but it's always stuck with me.

10 years on and I can't think of a time I've ever been sexually attracted to someone. Whenever friends talk about how hot some girl is or how hard they're looking for hookups on tinder I just can't relate because I don't have that kind of sexual desire. Some friends have suggested I might be asexual, but after researching it I'm not convinced (plus there's still debate over whether it's even a real thing or not, especially when it comes to self identification). Because of that thing that happened when I was 12 as well as the general religious environment I grew up in where sex and nudity were all taboo, I can't rule out that there's repression going on.

I'm considering going to therapy to sort my shit out but I'm still under my parents insurance and they'd find out, and it's the last thing I want to talk to them about

>>91362972
Isukiri is just the Japanese phonetics of "Jesus Christ" abbreviated.

Japanese fucks scammed you into believing their lame ass Garlic fields had a history.

>>91357227
>Caleb
You know the meaning behind that name?

>>91357227
>Work as manager of Arcade/indoor party place
>We host birthday parties
>One day family of Jehova's witnesses come in
>Want to let there kids play there
>Okay
>Start asking about if we host parties and telling me their son just turned 10
>Tell them that while we do host birthday parties we can't just do it last second that they need to schedule in advance
>Suddenly they get mad and tell me that they don't celebrate birthday's because it's against their religion that this is just a regular party they happen to be having on their kids birthday
>okay whatever but I still can't hold one today, we are already booked and even if we weren't I would need to call in extra staff and buy supplies
>Ask them if they want to schedule for another day
>NO IT HAS TO BE TODAY
>Why? you said you don't celebrate birthdays right?
>They refuse to answer and just let their kids play in the arcade
>Keep insisting I give them free shit (Free games,tickets,prizes,food)
>After about an hour of this get annoyed because they keep pestering employees and tell them to either leave staff alone or leave.
>Suddenly start demanding to see manager
>"Guess what bitch?"
>Demand to see owner
>Tell them to kick rocks
>Eventually have to call police because they are now screaming at me and other employees and have made threats
>Said they would report me to the BBB
>Nothing came of it
Basically fuck JW.

>>91363105
Both of my parents lost their faith at an early age so I was good to go.

>>91358468
>Jesus has a haircut

Wow. You dishonest fags.

File: IMG_5335.jpg (101KB, 640x640px) Image search: [Google]

101KB, 640x640px

>>91360615
Get on my level bitch

>>91363486
I had the same thing happen with a bunch of black people. That's why I hate black people.

>>91360881
>"Dad why can't we practice a religion that's less of a joke, like Mormonism"
It's sad when you're more of a joke than the fucking Mormons

>>91363517
Long hair wasn't socially acceptable back then, paul makes a comment about it in one of his sermons
>is it not nature that men should not have long hair
Something like that. Some people take it to mean that men having long hair is a sin but paul's clearly talking about culture and not some religious law there

>>91358468
>Jehhova wants us to be his friend and live in paradise forever!
But only 10,000 of us everyone else can get fucked.
Paradise is full fuck off.

>>91363120
Not the guy you responding too but but I was raised a JW as well and yeah that's pretty much it. You basically have to be a "bad" JW if you ever want to have fun because the religion is so strict and JWs are always making weird ass compromises because of it, like for example it's a big no-no to watch anything which is deemed as having "occult" stuff (aka magic) like Harry Potter (which they made big deal about as being demonic when it was popular) but everyone was fine with superheroes and scifi like Star Wars because there was no magic, it really depends on the family too, my parents were more lenient well as far as JWs go because we could watch christmas specials on tv but more strict JW parents usually don't allow stuff like that.
>>91362863
No they believe you just get die permanently (no chance of resurrection they don't believe humans except a select few go to heaven) at Armageddon, ts basically the same concept though just replace "your going to hell"" with "your going to die in armageddon".

>>91363180
KJV
Leviticus 18-22
"Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind: it is abomination.

Romans 1-26-28
"For this cause God have them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature.
And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the women, burned in their list one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.
And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God have them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient;"

>>91362949
>But people are turned off because of them not accepting blood, and door knocking.

They're also nontrinitarian. That pretty much makes them fundamentally incompatible with any mainstream Christian denomination.

>>91363105
Visiting my dad was often shitty because my Jehovah's Witness stepmom was full "No Fun Allowed" over shit like movies and vidya.

I still make it a point that as faithful as my aunt was for contrast, religious and all, she still let us watch Robocop before any of us hit double digits whereas little miss Irongate would break cassettes, CDs and cartridges she doesn't want in her house.

It's interesting that I was introduced at an early age that being religious had spectrums to it.

>>91362404
Doesn't really matter. It's still lust.

Hell, you can actually start lusting after your own wife

>>91363517
>Hurr, art drawn thousands of years later usually has Jesus looking like a long haired hippie, therefore he really did look like that

>>91363619
But aren't you allowed to do that? Lust isn't inherently a sin, only improper lust

>>91358468
What about this amazing work of art?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8NNHmV3QPw

>>91358468
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9g5XGozRFxE

My auntie went to a church on christmas day that played vid related
toilet humor involving literal shit is okay to play at church apparently

>>91363604
That and they're staunchly against politics, nationalism, use of the cross as well as being very pro multiculturalism and environmentalism so they go against the grain of alot of stereotypical evangelical views in the US.

>>91363622
People still believe a non-white Jesus is unrealistic despite most of those people being in the fucking desert and passages describing his hair like sheep's wool.

Clearly artistic interpretation is fine if it suits one's needs. That's how vanity works.

>>91363564
>Some people take it to mean that men having long hair is a sin but paul's clearly talking about culture and not some religious law there
That's pretty much it, remember Sampson? Dude had long hair BECAUSE of religious law

>>91363105
My mom forbid me to play Magic: The Gathering. She said (at the time) that it was satanic. My family wasn't even that religious.

I found out later that she probably just didn't want me to turn out like my uncle who's a total loser who never grew up. Joke's on her though, I'm still a total loser, but for completely different reasons than my uncle.

>>91357663

That's okay. JW don't want you to have friends outside the church. If they can't make you dependent on the church how can they force you to stay?

>>91363702
These flies won't even live around the ambulatory stage. Why would they give a shit about when the baby grows up?

File: Nerf-Mastodon-Mega-Blaster-Featured-image-672x372.jpg (37KB, 672x372px) Image search: [Google]

37KB, 672x372px

>>91357782
Child, move aside

I mean seriously, what is this bitch's problem?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s2vR2_T1dS4

>>91363638
All lust is improper. That's what makes it lust.
If it were a proper it would be love, which is selfless whereas lust is selfish.

>>91363452
That sucks man. Best of luck.

File: IMG_5336.jpg (46KB, 400x321px) Image search: [Google]

46KB, 400x321px

>>91363750
Speaking of which...

https://churchpop.com/2015/06/15/if-jesus-had-been-korean-20-rare-paintings-of-the-life-of-christ/

Jesus if he was Korean

>>91363826
What's the dad's accent? I can't place it

File: juzis.png (78KB, 426x240px) Image search: [Google]

78KB, 426x240px

Who is this guy?!

>>91363831
Lust is just sexual desire. If that's wrong, I don't want to be right.

>>91358468
>Jehovah knows what makes everyone happy
>People can only enter his land if they meet his standards
Why aren't Antifa groups going after this guy? He sounds like a real asshole.

>>91363452
Anon in a lot of cases asexuality could be a physiological issue. You might also want to go to the doctor unless you can get off just fine.

>>91363798
>She said (at the time) that it was satanic. My family wasn't even that religious.
First of all, why the hell would nonreligious people give a shit if something is satanic?

Second, just run exclusively white Angel decks ;)

>>91363831
The things linked in >>91362318 state that not all lust is sinful in nature. Lust isn't even inherently about sex

>>91363826
That mom keeps changing.

Is it the same mom? Is she a multiethnic clone? Is she secretly a demon?

>>91363889
My uncle had given me a bunch of his old cards (I'm pretty sure they were from the very early 90's) and I was loving looking though them and reading the cards and looking at the art. That was basically all I liked about them for years, I had no interest in playing the game.

>>91363873
No, it really isn't.

Lust is sexual desire for sexual desire's sake, focused only on you and getting an orgasm for yourself. Love requires you to focus on the other, give yourself up for them, fully devote yourself to them and find peace and love in them that all merges together in having children.

Lust is cheap hollow garbage, love, REAL love isn't.

"Love consists not in feeling great things but in having great detachment and in suffering for the beloved." ~Juan de Yepes y Álvarez

>>91363936
>~Juan de Yepes y Álvarez
literally who

>>91363864
My best guess is Cuban, but I could be way off.

>>91363826
>what is this bitch's problem?
She's a Jehovah's Witness.

File: IMG_5337.jpg (134KB, 631x804px) Image search: [Google]

134KB, 631x804px

>>91363951
Pic related
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_of_the_Cross

>>91360408
>>91360240
Gtfo put you god loving filth, this site is for hedonists only

>>91363831
Don't listen to this guy, read this
>>91362318
instead.

Fucking christfags and their shit rapist prudish god all need to be gassed

>>91363877
I jack off but it's 2-3 times a week and I don't use porn. I'm either thinking about the act itself or just random non-sexual thoughts (eg what I plan to do today, normal shit you would think while not fapping).
A friend suggested I should try looking at porn and see what it does. I did and it doesn't get me hard, but I think it makes me feel guilty - I periodically look behind my shoulders just in case someone walked in that I didn't hear.
Being a psychological issue is most likely. There are a few things that can give me an erection but they're not associated with wanting to have sex with a person (arousal and sexual attraction are two different things from what I understand). It's all very confusing to me and I just ignore it because it's easier than having to confront it

>>91363569
I think it's 144,000 in heaven but as many as will fit on earth.

>>91362879
Zelos and Kratos would have a word with you

>>91363826
They're making an animation of a boy kicking a ball
And they don't squash or stretch the ball at all
who the fuck made these

>>91364016
Thems are Catholics. Most denominations allow preachers to marry, so they don't gotta get it from little kids.

>>91363936
So what? I see nothing wrong with seeking sexual gratification. Part of being in a relationship is allowing you and your partner to be a little selfish.

What is the point of a loving god if he creates cancer, autism, and eternal damnation for those who do not submit? What is wrong with hedonistic pleasures to the point that those who enjoy them should be killed by crusader filth. I spit in the face of this facist bastard you call god

File: 18526ef0789c759a2ad533c6aad88f03dd6720b8b91d9ca9ae2bef3bf523fe50.jpg (80KB, 715x715px) Image search: [Google]

80KB, 715x715px

>>91363985
You're thinking of Reddit and Tumblr. 4chan is a good Christian site.

>>91364061
I had a priest who i thought might diddle me when i was younger

>>91364078

>What is the point of a loving god if he creates cancer, autism, and eternal damnation
Any religion that teaches that god willingly made these things should be ignored. It directly contradicts his love qualities.

In a way, I can at least sympathize with the JWs, since they don't teach any of that. They're the contrarians against the mainstream religions, so much so that their work is often banned for no reason.

>>91364100
So religion should teach that god made mistakes?

>>91364081
Shove your buzzwords up your priest sperm infected ass. This site belongs to traps, neets, and other societal perverts, and we will not be kicked out by a bunch of filthy cuckold christfags

>>91363147
UUUU

File: castfist.jpg (11KB, 184x184px) Image search: [Google]

11KB, 184x184px

>>91362879
>he doesn't multiclass

>>91364100
Either he willingly made those things or he continues to allow them to exist. He's either not all powerful or doesn't give a shit.

>>91364078
it's just a trial :^)

>>91364097
Kill yourself you meme spouting shit spewing holy roller
>>91364100
Then he should be raped in the pits of hell for letting it happen

>>91364078
Well one God puts his people through trials and tribulations all throughout the bible. Second if you reject God so be it its your soul that'll suffer damnation for eternity.

>>91364027
Jeez that sucks. I'd ask if it were possible you might be gay because that seems like a better alternative than that.

>>91364131
I will piss on the face of that indignant dictator jesus for putting me through the hell of earth. Fuck christian vermin

>>91364145
That fucking bastard should wither in pain and torment for the shit i have had to deal with, how dare he condemn me for being upset at my shitfest of a so called "trial". I will not simply roll over and spread my asscheaks because he is my creator. Fuck god, and fuck his ass bitchs of servants

>>91364127
>>91364111
>>91364141
>>91364145

I've actually done alot of research on the bible using literature from various religious organizations, noting any contradictions and citing any sources they bring up, and as far as I can tell, this is how things went down in olden days.

>God wants to make a family
>creates Jesus, then the angels, then humans
>Satan is an angel, gets jealous, convinces the human parents (who were perfect) to rebel
>God could strike them down right now, but that would go against the free will he gave them, so he figures that it's only fair to let them live with their consequences, to show a life separated from God
>as a result, humans grow old, get sick, and die
>this is to create a sort of "precedent" not unlike one you see in a court case, which would forever showcase what happens if you were to ever blatantly defy God in such a disrespectful way
>he needs countless millenia to prove this, so the precedent can be strong
>Adam and Eve made their bed and no longer exist. They're not in a burning hell, nor suffering, they just became dirt again
>since none of their kids willingly ate from the same tree, they all have a chance at redemption, but must prove that they will love and worship god even if put through trials. They need to prove that they aren't just doing it for selfish reasons
>if someone dies without knowing god, he plans on bringing them back to give them a second chance. This is referred to as a resurrection of the righteous AND the unrighteous
>if someone died and they were a genuinely evil person, they won't come back
>overall, god is supposedly giving everyone a chance to prove themselves, without being unfair about it

You're free to believe it or call it hocus pocus hogwash if you want. I just wanted to share the results of my research.

>>91364211
So he is a facist dictator who wants to smother out the exsistance of anyone who doesnt worship and suck his preverbial dick?

>gays are mostly atheist
>this thread is gays hating God and Jesus
Seems about right.

Cease your faggotry

>>91363105
I wasn't allowed to play with Yu-Gi-Oh cards, as they were satanic.

Also, my mother intermittently cancelled cable, believing that the bible is all the entertainment one should need. I only had television from ages 5-7 and ages 9-11.

Still had video games and VHS tapes, though.

>>91364235
Only when you stop blindly following your impotent puritain fuckhead of a god

File: IMG_8644.jpg (106KB, 640x640px) Image search: [Google]

106KB, 640x640px

>>91363874
Because shitty people with two-faced motives make up antifa, the anarcho-communist little shits.
Sorry
I guess

>>91364226

He's more like a father who's had enough of his spoiled brat of a child who cries every day about not getting his way. Imagine hearing that for millions of years. I can sympathize, I hate working with kids who get spoiled by their parents.

>>91364240
Jesus, i wouldve killed my mother if were in your place. Sorry bro

>>91364235
How can anyone hate something that's not real, though?
Oh, nevermind, forgot where I was.

File: IMG_0909.jpg (131KB, 600x500px) Image search: [Google]

131KB, 600x500px

>>91362879
MAGE OR WIZARD
WILL ALWAYS BE
BEST CLASS
REPRESENT

>>91364253
Overpopulated rat babies are nothing compared to the health of the earth. Get fucked and off yourself christcuck

I don't know which is worse obvious brainwashing or subtle. Our family wasn't religious but I was raised by strict standards.

Sex is literally never allowed, ever (maybe once, to make children) that kinda stuff.

>>91364257
He should suffer in shit and bile for making our world the way it is
>>91364261
I hate the idea because of faggots in this thread inspired by the idea

File: Boipucci.jpg (74KB, 593x1000px) Image search: [Google]

74KB, 593x1000px

>>91357227
It's okay mommy, he's a priest.

>>91363105
Nope
My parents had to deal with a bit of it, mostly because of where they lived or just a habitual "it's just what we do" kinda thing.
They wanted me to be free to choose that kind of thing unlike them.
So I'm a godless heathen but I'm no fedora tipper, I'm actually a bit into some weird pseudo-spiritual willpower/thought-focus related self improvement at the moment, and that's going well.
Because it's kinda funny, my dad said his hometown was basically like the one in footloose, the one that banned dancing because muh stuffy morals. Because his was actually strict about that, culturally speaking, just not legally.
I think he said they danced with their hands not touching, specifically.

>>91360582
Caleb is Anakin, the mom is Palpatine, the toy is the Jedi Code, Jehova is the Dark Side.

>>91363868
Australian Jesus

>>91363555
Mormons are very nice people.
Nice people with fancy long-johns, a pension for nepotism, and an aversion to coffee and liquor, but nice people none the less.

File: letittakeme.jpg (560KB, 776x1054px) Image search: [Google]

560KB, 776x1054px

>>91364284
Religion is necessary for a healthy society. Atheistic societies operate on secular religions like Communism or feminism, which are forced just as if not more heavily in their societies yet aren't perceived in the same way because it doesn't concern the metaphysical.

Sex isn't inherently wrong, but it has an inherent gravitas.

>>91364423
Religion is what made feminism, which acts like a bunch of man hating sex hating priests for the most part. Socialism is good, however. So fuck off and opinion discarded.

>>91364151
See, this is where I get even more confused
When I was in high school I had a few crushes on girls. They were never sexual in nature, but "I want to be in a relationship with them and marry". I never acted on it at all because I thought I'd get over it within a month or so, and sure enough I did.

I had a close friend in high school, but looking back it was a pretty shit dynamic without open communication - so it's no real surprise it fell apart once he got a girlfriend and school ended. Since then I've learnt not to rely on others for self worth (ie not be a clingy shit), and now I've got a close friend again but with a much healthier dynamic.
I do find some guys visually attractive - meaning I like the way they look, but they don't give me an erection, if that makes sense. My closest friend at the moment, the reason I first bothered speaking to him in class was because I thought he was cute. We're both physically touchy, we hug but nothing more than that. He's pretty effeminate but considers himself straight since gay porn doesn't get him hard (he's had a few girlfriends but I believe he's still a virgin).
In my head there's a really weird blurry line between close friend and romantic relationship - since sex isn't consciously a motivation, the only thing distinguishing the two is label semantics (and I guess future obligations to move in or whatever). I can't think of any way hanging out with a close friend would be different to a date once you're in a relationship, besides kissing/sex obligations.
Sometimes I think about what it would be like to do sexual things with him, but it's more of a 'what if' than a desire to actually do it, if that makes sense. I don't know if that's just because I'm repressed and/or this is emotionally the closest relationship I've had with anyone so my mind's testing the waters.

I could accept bi, but I can't be gay without destroying what's currently a civil family relationship where we don't fight at all

File: IMG_5710.jpg (42KB, 537x418px) Image search: [Google]

42KB, 537x418px

>>91364027
What kind of porn? I bet it was normie shit.
Gotta try out some mild xenophilia stuff my dude.
That's the good shit.
Tell ya what, let me step in where your old man failed you.
I'm sending you on a journey of self discovery, a trial of patience and determination to find what revs your motor, if anything.
There's only one site on this rock with all varieties of nonstandard nsfw content there is:
Deviantart.
It's where I first sifted my gems from the sea of miscellaneous trash, and maybe it can be yours too.
Unless you've tried that, but still. You never know.
Maybe the tidal wave of shit will break those mental barriers, who knows, I'm no shrink.

>>91364530
every porn board on 4chan, male and female, real and drawn

>>91358468
i'm not gay
gay are not a problem for me,
i mean come on look roberto bolle and tell me you are not glad to don't have him into a competition for girls.
really.

>>91364274
But I'm a godless heathen, you little cucksickle

>>91363105
I wasn't allowed to go to any "gaalo" house since apparently all they do is eat pork and drink beer. Coupled with me being more or less an introvert, I was always the "fringe" friend, the friend at the edge of the group, if that makes sense. It fucking sucks.

>>91364565
Then why do you care for a bunch of mexian babie filth like some bleeding heart pansy

>>91364575
>I was always the "fringe" friend, the friend at the edge of the group
iktf

>>91364550
Hmm...
Even the boards with a hundred different fetish generals? Did you check in some of those? It might be that you have a very niche kink that's yet to be...found?
I mean I have no fucking idea if that's remotely possible, but shit until you can talk to a professional...
All I know is that if I try to wank without some attachment or focus to the kink, it's nearly impossible to get going. I'm wondering if...maybe your special something was forgotten and repressed long ago. I mean I knew from a young age that my thing was a thing that made me feel odd in certain ways, and if repression is a likely cause of your troubles, it's worth looking into.
WE'VE GOTTA GET ANON'S GROOVE BACK

>>91364579
Because it's proof that unfiltered socialism and/or communism is pure cancer and only retards see merit in it.
And also I'm not autistic so I'm capable of empathy.
Your move, Cuckleberry Finn

>>91364260
Can't say I didn't fantasize about it.

>>91363985
>>91364113
My favorite cartoon is also BoJack Horseman.

>>91364668
Yeah no shit unfiltierd communism is trash. But human life is worthless in comparison to mother earths survival. Id slaughter a thousand children if it meant this planet would survive. Fuck off you sjw tier pussy

Why do abrahamic religions have something against sexuality in general (except pedos and bestaility, these are true wrong)?
>god created Adam and Eve nude, he got mad, created the fruit, Adam and Eve ate the fruit, god: Ha, cover yourselves nudefags, your body is shameful
>Greeks were sinners, they were in limbo then they'll ago to hell just because they had different (pagan) religion and tolerated nudity
>storks brought kids, not penis and puss
>you must be married first to have sex
>if you had premarital sex, you're bad
>no talking about sex and nudity
>nudity is bad, cover your genitals
>sex is sacred, do it in private
>masturbation is bad, cut your hands
>circumcise your penis so you won't list
>your body is shameful, don't be proud
>censor the nudes and don't show it to kids
>do not be hedonistic, obey your righteous God
>sex is bad, therefore evil people use sex as a weapon (rape)
>depicting sex and nudity is wrong, burn it down or destroy it
>many more thing
Even my phone censors the word "nudity" (I get Judith) and "sex" (I get Dex, sec or SFX).
God is the our creator. If he didn't hate the boogieman called hedonism, he would make us live with it and still believe in him. Islam is hedonistic, I know, but they treat women like abominations and cover them because sex is the boogieman, and I hat SJWtards who defend shitslam because muh diversity.

>>91364682
What the fuck does that have anything to do with my statements, retard?

>>91364692
>and I hat SJWtards who defend shitslam because muh diversity.
As a person affected by radical christianity, i feel betrayed by the left for this

>>91360652
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SYkbqzWVHZI

>>91364692
>Why do abrahamic religions have something against sexuality in general
Probably a overreactive backlash to Babylonian religious sexuality. Seriously, look into that shit, it was wild.

>>91364692
In terms of limiting sex between a husband and wife, coupled with a general opposition towards birth control and contraception, perhaps it is a way to increase followers of the religion by having more and more children born into it.

>>91364783
*limiting sex to something between a husband and wife

>>91363105
>tfw my mom was actually a fucking prostitue herself and had a weird fucking life, drugs n shit
>she never banned anything, only gave me tips and story about random life shit
>also explained how to deal with girls, what they like for most of them
To this day i'm 23 and never did drugs, never smoked, drink only time to time. Still virgin but only because i mot that interested in sex itself. Already got some blowjobs in the past.
I'm not a sperg either and probably the most educated guy in my fucking family.
thx for reading my blog

>>91364702
:)

File: IMG1358.jpg (344KB, 1200x1600px) Image search: [Google]

344KB, 1200x1600px

>>91364113
>This site belongs to traps, neets, and other societal perverts, and we will not be kicked out by a bunch of filthy cuckold christfags
No one is trying to kick you out. You serve as great examples to us of the depravity that Satan unleashes within those that reject the Lord.

>>91363105
My parents were pretty irreligious, thankfully. I was more or less allowed to do what I wanted as long as it didn't fuck with other people or land me in jail.

File: priestlel.jpg (54KB, 600x400px) Image search: [Google]

54KB, 600x400px

>>91364692
>god created Adam and Eve nude, he got mad, created the fruit, Adam and Eve ate the fruit, god: Ha, cover yourselves nudefags, your body is shameful
Wrong. The fruit represents the choice to reject God's love. Without the freedom to rebel, there is no consent, and with no free will, humanity is no better than animals or rocks. Also Adam and Eve made the clothes themselves before confronting God.
>Greeks were sinners, they were in limbo then they'll ago to hell just because they had different (pagan) religion and tolerated nudity
Concept of incomplete ignorance, also neo-Platonism greatly influenced western Christianity.
>storks brought kids, not penis and puss
That's culture, not religion.
>you must be married first to have sex
>if you had premarital sex, you're bad
Psychology tells us sex is linked to emotion.
>nudity is bad, cover your genitals
>sex is sacred, do it in private
All cultural and not religious. Protestants are prudish fags, yeah.
>the rest of your list
More culture and mostly heretical inventions.

>>91365058
>>you must be married first to have sex
>>if you had premarital sex, you're bad
>Psychology tells us sex is linked to emotion.

in what way does your comment address the lines you quoted?

>>91365037
Well if meaning im a satanist for not wanting to be cucked from sex and not enjoy movies and cartoons for being sacreligious then hail fucking satan

>>91365058
Yet god loves us so much to let us rot in hell? What kind of mental gymnastics did you go through on that man

Fuck the Renaissance for ruining angels. Fuck off with that pretty bitch with 2 wings bullshit.

File: 1.png (349KB, 691x414px) Image search: [Google]

349KB, 691x414px

Friendly reminder that Satan is the light and God is the true deceiver.

>>91365073
>Well if meaning im a satanist for not wanting to be cucked from sex and not enjoy movies and cartoons for being sacreligious then hail fucking satan
How is marrying a virgin wife and having lots of babies with her 'getting cucked from sex'? I would say having an 'open relationship', 'being polyamorous', having fuckbuddies/friends with benefits or dating a slut would be closer to getting cucked since you're getting sloppy seconds or sloppy 17ths. And Christians can watch cartoons and movies, obviously.

>>91365086
>That image
The PR might have been a little better if you hadn't eaten people.

>>91365086
Femmism is a religion you fucking faggot. Quit being such a christcuck then youd see how much religion fucking hurts people

>>91365134
No, almost everything is sacreligious and having no fapping and sticking to one worn out whore of a wife for life is getting cucked

File: helping-the-retarded-to-know-god-book.jpg (50KB, 465x465px) Image search: [Google]

50KB, 465x465px

>>91365148
>Femmism
Even for your kind, there is hope.

>>91365072
Not really direct, but the fact that emotion is tied to sexuality points to the fact that sex has moral gravity. You could also see this illustrated in the fact that kids from broken families are at a huge disadvantage for success. This doesn't prove my point spiritually, but it really fires the neurons.

>>91365084
Humans are the pinnacle of the material world because they have free will. If humans didn't have free will, they could not love.

God did not create humans to be robots.

>>91365188
Your fucking bitch god is a cuckold, a rapist, and a facist lier. Only a literal cuckbitch would submit to him. Get assraped christcuck vermin

>>91365194
>>>91365084 #
>Humans are the pinnacle of the material world because they have free will. If humans didn't have free will, they could not love.
>God did not create humans to be robots.
Still didnt answer my question

>>91365148
You do realize that Christianity if going be the bible standards tell women to serve their husbands and treat them with high regards and serve them since they are their superiors. The way feminism is today goes against the bible.

>>91365194
>emotion is tied to sexuality points to the fact that sex has moral gravity.
What kind of leap in logic is that?
I'm happy when I listen to music. Does music have moral gravity too?

>>91364097
I can't help but wonder if autists on 4chan would still role play as devout Christians if /r/atheism never existed or became popular.

File: puritan nun smuggie.jpg (18KB, 250x250px) Image search: [Google]

18KB, 250x250px

>>91365211
You sound upset. Have you tried praying?

>>91365219
God loves you and expects you to love and follow him. If you simply choose not to listen and reject him then you go to hell. Love is a two way street anon.

>>91365236
Feminism is a reaction to the woman oppression in the bible. I hate it, but it made women feel like they should be above boys rather then equals out of defiance. Fuck femnism and fuck that cuckold jesus
>>91365252
You think fucking fedora memes validate your shit opinion? Pathetic. No wonder your claseless bigoted is dying out with you scum. Kill yourself bitch

>>91365279
Then hes a fucking facist pig for being such a psychotic heartless fuck
>>91365270
Id rather drink bleach

File: death.jpg (20KB, 598x453px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 598x453px

>>91365219
Come on man it ain't that difficult to make the connections.

>"Why would God allow humans to go to hell if He loves us?"
>Love requires mutual consent
>Humans have free will
>Hell is the rejection of God
>Humans can accept God (good) or reject God (bad)
>The ability to reject God's love gives God's love meaning

It's like the argument that death is what gives life meaning, but on a more fundamental level.

>>91365298
Then hell sounds like a swell place if im not around that judgemental prudish fuck

>>91365298
>death is what gives life meaning
What kind of fucked up argument is that?
The fact death exists doesn't magically give life meaning

>>91365324
Not him, but I think death makes life more meaningful because time is precious.

>>91365326
A few misspellings doesnt make me illiterate you jesus cock sucking retard

>>91365211
I have never seen someone this wrong and this buttblasted on 4chan, ever. Everything you typed in all your posts is tripe and full of ignorance.

It's funny.

>>91365338
It just means you're obese. :^)

>>91365353
Ignorance? God raped mary to make jesus, yet he tortures people for jerking off. A fucking hypocrite if i ever seen one

File: Get the Cross.jpg (93KB, 920x1024px) Image search: [Google]

93KB, 920x1024px

>>91365308
Suit yourself. Maybe pack some sunscreen, I hear it gets a little toasty.

>>91365355
It doesnt mean that either you fucking meme spouting mouth breather

>>91365362
>I hear it gets a little toasty.
A clear sign of a "just" and "loving" god

>>91365308
To be honest, I agree with you. God as described in the bible is a colossal douche.

>>91365357
>God raped mary

Gabriel asked permission.

>>91365378
I could break your fucking neck you shitfaced /pol/tard. Back to your containment board, faggot.

>>91365398
I'm actually from /fit/ but it's always nice to see a landwhale in its natural environment. I don't even think I said anything /pol/ related anyway.

>>91365391
No he fucking didnt

>>91365404
Being a christcuck already makes you /pol/. But since your from /fit/, then no wonder the roids fuck with your brain cells

I can't tell if this thread is one guy arguing with themselves or just a regular shitpost war

>>91365417
I never even posted anything about Christ you dense sludge. Below are my posts, I just posted in this thread to make fun of your obvious autism. I don't care about either of your guys' religious arguments and was merely teasing you about being fat. Also roids are bad, mmkay?

>>91365355
>>91365378
>>91365404

>>91364081
The number of people on 4chan who regularly attend church is probably less than 5%.

File: 1.png (6KB, 335x169px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 335x169px

>>91365427
Some autist is sperging so I made fun of him. Sorry for the confusion.

>>91363826
>boy demanding sandwich
>she drops cookware
a kid being a little rude isn't a good reason to be irresponsible with your stuff

>>91365443
Aww, im sorry that i interupted your shitposting. Have fun calling others fat to make up for your low iq, and keep pumping iron so you wont feel like a bitch from where the priest touched you

>>91363826
>Oh yes sweetie. I'm gonna make you the best tofu meat replacement sandwich with spinach ever!
Fucking mom.

>>91365470
It's my choice to make fun of the mentally disabled on 4chan. Just because you're the target demographic doesn't mean you should stand in the way of 4chan tradition.

>>91363826
The kid was being a little shit, do you guys really take his side in this one?

>>91365405
Well she gave consent.

>>91365497
If anyones retarded its the workout dumbass. Stay mad faggot

>>91365497
Anon I don't know if you know this but working out throughout the week doesn't need to be overkill. In fact, science backs up the claim that those who are healthy and fit have faster reflexes, brain connectivity, and are able to think clearer than those who eat estrogen filled food products, are fat/obese, and have no drive/testosterone. Being fit is a way to actively be more intelligent, not just for the mental positives but also for your lifes longevity. The stereotype of the ignorant and stupid bully being a jock is actually not as true as the bully being fat and ugly. Granted, this is contextual and each scenario is different per person, but on my growing up the ugly ones bullied the weaker kids. It's why I even got fit in the first place, to beat the shit out of my bully.

>>91365510
We know it's still you by your selective failure to use periods. Also
>making fun of someone for working out
BOOM! YOU SURE ROASTED HIM! BAZINGA! WAIT TILL REDDIT HEARS ABOUT THIS ONE!

>>91358813
Caleb didn't go to college because he had an accident and needed a transfusion

>>91365552
Fucking bitch was too scared to hear my rebuttel

>>91365510
See>>91365540
Apologies, extremely tired.

>>91365541
>not using periods
Way to reach harder dumbass bitch

>>91363596
>old testament
>still thinking the "lie with mankind" shit has anything to do with homosexuality
It's talking about treating men as badly as people treated women back then. Do not beat women when they make mistakes, that's what you do with women etc. And also it's called the OLD testament for a reason. Nobody follows it anymore. The pope himself reads from the new testament. You know, the one that happened after Jesus came along and told everyone how they're supposed to be acting because they'd been doing it wrong all along?

Second one, in all it's awkwardly-phrased and confusing glory, appears to be talking about men working together to do evil and sin. Like how Sodom and Gomorrah were dens of filth and hedonism, such as drinking, stealing, killing etc. (Fun fact: did you know that "sodomy" doesn't actually mean just buttsex? It means literally any sexual act not involving penis + vagina; oral sex, handjobs, footjobs, boobjobs, sex toys, literally anything that's not dick in pussy.)

Stop following shit that Jesus Christ said was outdated and needed to be remade, so it was and thus the new testament was born. Fuck, I'm not even religious and I know this shit.

>>91365577
You realize you're getting rekt right now friend.

>>91365580
>You realize you're getting rekt right now friend.
Ebin

>>91365578
>It's talking about treating men as badly as people treated women back then.
Pretty sure 'do not lie with a man as you would with a woman' is about as blunt as they could get about it. Keep in mind they didn't have a word for sex, they used euphemisms like 'lie with' and 'know'. I mean ypu're grasping at straws really. And the New Testament is just as clear about it but you handwave that away.

File: caleb no.png (1MB, 1783x1785px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1783x1785px

>>91357227

>>91365671
They also didn't have a word for homosexuality back then, either. Because the concept was pretty alien to them. But no, there was a lot of overlap with euphemisms back then. Case in point, that whole "12x12" shit JW's think means a finite number of people get into heaven or whatever they have. Shit's confusing and often misread.

What do they say in the new testament about gay sex then?

>>91365578
I like how you ignore the quote from new testament then. Second the pope is a blamphous against God himself. There's no other mediator between God and man besides Christ himself.
Matthew 5: 17-18

17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.

18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled.

>>91365711
If the term they used for sex in general was 'lie with' it seems logical that the term that they used for man-on-man sex was 'man lies with a man', no? Seems pretty open and shut to me. Everything else is just wishful thinking.

@christians
Why have you chosen to have faith? There's no observable proof that god exists, but you still made the conscious decision to believe in God - why?
This is a genuine inquiry. Pulling a "how do you know he's not real" isn't a valid point here - I'm asking specifically why you personally chose the "I believe he's real" side

>>91364692
Islam is an Abrahamic religion you mongoloid.

>>91365885
Because niggers like you won't be happy until everyone picks a side, and some people are willing to believe there's SOMETHING out there to avoid the creeping death anxiety that pervades the lives of every human being by reaching for a sense of immortality in religion.

You did literally no research whatsoever before asking a question tons of very intelligent people have answered with the intent to try and shallowly make people question their beliefs at little effort or cost to yourself for cheap gratification.

kys

>>91365949
I'm 25 and have gone to church every single sunday because my parents are religious and I was brought up in it. I've never been baptised and in the last few months I came to the realization that I was just going along with everything because it was normal to me and not because I actually believed it

Would you like to rethink your reply now

>>91365971
You still asked a fucking stupid question you could've gotten an answer for in ten minutes of searching. You live in the information age, but you'd rather bitch and moan at /co/ where you can be easily influenced and misled by any retard with an opinion than actually research your question in one of the openly available academia databases from people whose views and motivations are clear and moderated by peer review.

People like you shouldn't be allowed to vote desu

>>91366012
I want to know why YOU believe. I want to hear personal accounts from people in this thread. It's not a matter of looking up facts, they simply aren't relevant to this discussion. Beliefs are not based in logic.

>>91366033
All I'm hearing is "But I don't WANT to read a peer-reviewed paper on why people act the way they do! I want anecdotal and often conflicting evidence!"

>>91366052
Why are you mad?

>>91360190
http://rule34.paheal.net/post/list/Caleb%27s_Mom/1

>>91360203
Life is all about that min/max.

>>91358468
Jehovah sounds like a fucking asshole.

>>91357227
>russia just officially declared JWs an extremist group
so glad i'm finally free from that fucking cult

File: Trashman.png (368KB, 400x589px) Image search: [Google]

368KB, 400x589px

>>91365896
yes it is, so

File: stop judas das gay.jpg (46KB, 315x300px) Image search: [Google]

46KB, 315x300px

>been reading the bible every morning before bed (sleep schedule is fucked) for the last couple weeks for some reason.
>two pages till genesis is finished
>almost time or exodus

I'm not even religious but there's some dank shit in the bible. It's a fucking mess of conflicting messages and obscure allegories but it wasn't made for modern culture so what ever. It has great stories and cool concepts and some pretty good philosophical messages even by today's standards. The bible is inherently inspiring IMO. Like God as a character is a fucking cunt through and through but he has foresight out the ass, his character traits are pretty vague, and his implied majesty really makes you think about how you can personify a deity like that. One of the only deities of absolute, un-shared power.

>>91366810
As a guy reading the bible here's a warning Numbers is kinda boring. Like the name implies there's a lot of numbers counting the people of Isreal multiple times. They also go into great detail in how to build the arc of the covenant.

>>91366889
the recounting of the lineages is pretty boring. the only reason I go over them is I don't ask "well where the fuck did this guy come from" when they mention an obscure son of a son of a son a couple chapters later. Like going from Jacob to joseph. I probably would have missed it anyway had I not seen Joseph King of dreams like 4 times.

>>91366903
Well they do that throughout the bible but when it comes to Numbers though it's like chapter after chapter of just names it kinda puts you to sleep.

>>91366810
>It has great stories and cool concepts and some pretty good philosophical messages even by today's standards. The bible is inherently inspiring IMO

It is extremely evil, encourages genocide and slavery and all manner of atrocities, and you are a stupid piece of shit.

>>91366052
You sound autistic.

>>91357386
That shit hit WAY too close to home.

>>91366977
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=slKULc8W7lM
here you go, reddit.

>>91366977
bro, you must've misread; He was talking about the bible not the Quran, ya dingus.

File: 125f18b5a43501b39a2a58eff650f36659347df46ac4c464e39cde0b5b248b58.gif (14KB, 416x416px) Image search: [Google]

14KB, 416x416px

>>91366977
Tips fedora.
I don't remember Jesus running around with a sword beheading people.

>>91358468
>promoting interracial marriage

Heresy!

>>91366101
>those first two

Laughed so hard I accidentally hit my balls. I guess jehovah is trying to tell me something.

>>91361646

What if you beat it to the naughty tapes you recorded with your wife?

>>91362949

Go away Jehova's Shillness

>>91367005
Funny how this is pretty much what /pol/ has become lately

>>91357227
Caleb, that hamburger was mine!