Give me a rundown on the plot /co/

He inserts his 11" long, made of holly, possessing a phoenix feather core wand into her cauldron.

>>90809050
and then she'll be like, what are you doing to my cauldron?

>>90809204
Then Ron comes in and be useless for 12 pages

Hermione was black. Discuss

>>90808945
Ron does fuck all for 10 chapters.

>>90809513
That has two different meetings.

>>90809399
*ahem*
"We"

>>90810690
wuz

>>90813182
witches?

>>90809399
mudblood

>>90808945
That chick is 1/8 black at best

Harry just goes out with Padma instead of Ginny.

>>90808945
>Harry turning 40
>Going through midlife crisis
>Find out kid is dating a muggle
>Catches himself saying "fucking muds" under his breath

>>90809399
>Brainy, sassy, kinda bossy, black britchick

A fine thing, finding out you have a particular fetish one night. And on a blue board no less.

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>>90808945
>rundown

It's a relatively funny Family Guy joke

>>90813817
Americans think of quarter-blacks as black, so it still counts.

>>90808945
Harry enchants the half black chick with the talent of Laurence of Oliviea

>>90808945
3/10
The chick needed to be fully black. I am talking heart-of-the-motherland black.

>>90808945

She's Sirius' hereto unmentioned daughter.

>>90814554
>relatively funny

no such thing.
ever so often while I am switching channels, I fall on a digital plus station that shows a block of these shows every week night FG, Cleveland and the other shows and the art is awful, the jokes (and remember, I'm watching maybe 20-30 seconds at a time) are painful and all essentially: fat dumb white guy does stupid idiotic things while family/employer/etc goes along because plot

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>>90808945
Should be Roberta in a witch costume.

Stewie is Draco Malfoy.

>>90809399
One of the books specifically mentions her being white. Rowlings backpedaling is not going to change that.

>>90816399
Sauce
I don't remember any of the books saying that.

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>>90809399
Theatre has for countless years had men play women, women play men, and aside from some specific roles where race was actually important to the character, would simply cast whoever had the best acting/voice for the part.

It's only because we're in current year and Rowling had to stupidly try to do a post-book retcon (she likes those) that this one specific casting received any drama at all.

>>90816425
Can't remember which one. It was pointed out back when this was the big deal of the week.

>>90814039
I too love this fetish.

Black British Bitch was an eye-opener

>>90816463
>>90816399
I thought Rowling's thing was "Calm the fuck down; it's just theatre. She can be black because this thing's never going to have the same cast, so fuck off."

>>90816463
>received any drama at all.
And also because everybody is triggered by everything this day.

>Alternate version of book 5, where everyone listens to Dumbledore and the Magical Ministry's actually doing shit to prepare to fight Voldemort
>Harry has fuck all to do, because they have their best men working on it.
>Harry runs into a half-black chick from Hufflepuff
>Start shooting the shit about stuff as Harry feel like he needs to make more friends
>Bumbles about trying to figure out the right thing to say
>She finds it charming
>They stay up past curfew
>End up stumbling into that secret room with the Marauders Map
>They realize no one can find them
>They fuck
>HARD

So how's that petition to make Rowling live with 18 refugees coming along?

>>90809399
The girl who played her and Ron's daughter in the Cursed Child play is voicing Orisa in Overwatch.

>>90808945
BLEACHED

>>90816619
To be honest, Harry getting another love interest that isn't as bland and typical as Ginny would be for the best.

>>90808945
>>>/lit/

>>90817162
Silly anon, /lit/ hates Harry Potter with the passion of a thousand burning copies of Catcher in the Rye.

>>90813817
She'd be lighter if she was 1/2 black.

>>90816425

iirc it was not a scene where she was stated being white skinned but one where because of surprise/anxiousness turned pale at her face. Though this still proves she`s not black as blacks cannot turn pale at their faces either.

>>90816248
Its always that one guy who instead of just running with a slightly funny famguy joke they instead go on a autistic rant about how shit the show and its associated shows are

>>90816296
that cut away was before this show was a glint in seth's eye

>>90817094
Wait, what?

>>90809050
>>90809204
>>90809388
if i knew anything about harry potty i'd draw a comic of that shit

>>90816497
No, she said "I never said Hermione was white". She's also notorious for being the worst kind of armchair liberal.

>>90818175
She's knows for being an obnoxious pro-immigration liberal on twitter, so some people started a petition online to make her take in refugees in her giant 18 room mansion

>>90817187
Do they hate Catcher in the Rye too? Because that book is responsible for the death of John Lennon.

>>90817812
Blacks do pale, though. They don't go white, but they can lose color when shocked. It's more readily visible on lightskinned blacks.

>>90814571
You can't stay white once you have an ounce of blood from another race in you

>>90809399
What we know about in the books:

>Hermione has "bushy brown hair" and brown eyes
>Buck teeth, before braces
>Greek first name and British surname name (Maybe half Greek half black)

Other notes:
Yes:
>Her character is set up from the beginning to be a target of racism
>She involves herself in the movement to liberate house elves
No:
>Rowling does in fact, explicitly state when a character is not white (Dean Thomas, Blaise Zabini, Patel twins)
>Rowling is a nutjob hack who is the type of person to retcon someone's race or sexuality for tumblr points

>>90817158
Ginny was a terrible love interest period. Rowling even admitted that Harry and Hermione had better chemistry but she forced the pairing because she wanted the characters to be one big family at the end

>>90808945
She uses black magic, but only half the time.

Also her mother is from Kenya.

>>90817812
>as blacks cannot turn pale at their faces either.
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh anon

>>90820989
Rowling has a drawing of the characters she made during her pitch and she drew Hermione as white. Considering her physical description, she could be Jewish but she wasn't black

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Hermione's colour really doesn't matter, as she is still a worthless character in the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

>>90808945
colonized.com

>>90821034
>Gatsby
>God-Tier

No

>>90821034
>God tier
>Great Gatsby
Wow, I never stopped reading a list so quickly.

>>90820989
Dean Thomas is described as black in the first book. It was Blaise Zabini who eluded description until he was described as black in the later books.

>>90821025
Would make more sense if she were Greek + Jewish desu.

>>90821024
Red faced anon, blacks don't get red in the face when they're cold

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Harry Potter movies are absolute garbage.
It's a mental retardation of the wizards and it promotes occultism. They shit on James Bond.
Are books good? No!
>stretching legs
Stephen King read the books one day and he said hat they were gar-
>>90821034
Hey faggot, it was my turn!

>>90821065
I thought he had only been introduced in Half-Blood Prince.

>>90820989
>Greek first name

Plenty of non-Greeks have Greek names. Andrew, Dorothy, Chloe, and Zoe are Greek names. Okay, it's usually only the Greeks who name their kids Aristotle or Pericles.

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>>90821088
Okay before I patronize you any more, let's do a quick test.

Would you consider this a black person?

>>90821088
Depends on how light their skin is. I'm milk chocolate and my face only turns a shade of red when it's irritated by a skin condition.

>>90821120
I would sooner lump Hermione with Aristotle or Artemis, than Chloe or Dorothy.

>>90821123
Yes. It literally says so in the filename you fucking mongoloid.

>>90809399
I would honestly make Malfoy's "mudblood" slur make a bit more sense because otherwise it's farcical that a little white girl would be so deeply hurt by an insult she JUST learned existed. But maybe some little negress would be legitimately hurt by it.

>>90821152
Then why the FUCK do you think black people can't be pale or have red show through their cheeks when they can be as light skinned as the one in that picture you RETARD?

>>90821052
>>90821062
I know that's bait but you're still turboplebs.

>>90821164
That woman isn't black, it's a frenchfrykin from the future of the stock photo dimension.

>>90808945
i dont get it, where its the joke?

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>>90821164
>Do you think this black person is black?
>Yes
>THEN WHY YOU THINK BLACK PEOPLE DON'T HAVE TO BE DARKEST OF BLACK?

>>90821164
Blacks can't be pale because they aren't human.

>>90821217
Different guy, just want to get my say in.
When I was in high school there was this half-black girl with huge tits. She had anemia so she was kinda pale, and because of that you could see when she got embarrassed or angry.

>>90821189
Is it fun being in high school these days, anon?

>>90821034
take this shit back to /tv/ where it belongs!

>>90808945
>Half black chick
You mean MULATTO BUTT?

>>90808945
Harry fucks Hermione the end.

Yo, where's the comics and cartoons?

>>90821238
What a pointless series of greentexts.

Do you genuinely believe the woman in that picture wouldn't be able to visibly blush? Are you even part of this conversation you fucktard?

>>90821164
Woah, calm down nigger lover. You might just burst a vein.

>>90808945
The chick turns out to be voldemort.

>>90821123
I would

>>90821123
No, but I'd still lynch her just to be on the safe side.

>>90821123
Yeah she's black. It's called the one drop rule for a reason

>>90821283
>/tv/

Bloomposting is /lit/ mate. You can tell because it's even shitter than most /tv/ memes.

>>90821424
She's fully black.

There are pale black people.

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>>90809399
EYO RON YOU WAN SUM FUG

>>90814039
>black
>british
So long as her teeth are decent but that's approaching unicorn territory here...

>>90821034
Sup /lit/. What brings you to our neck of the woods today?

>>90821224
It's erotica written by Peter.

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>>90816425
2 seconds on Google.

>>90821034
It's never "Crash, yer a wizard Harry" or "Crash, Aunt Petunia made pancakes."

isnt this from the episode peter became a smut novelist?

>>90822090
then harry got caught when he was not able to see Hermione because of her natural camouflage.

The end.

>>90822090
Context, anon. Do you remember what was happening at that part?

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>the chapter where harry gets a ghost blow job from the girl that haunts the baths.

>>90813213
feminists

>>90822635
>moaning myrtle

>>90821123


In fact is more mulatto . Who is she? If her body is as pretty as her face i would fuck her non-stop.

Mullatas are a vulcan in bed.

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>>90809399
not to sound like a fag, but it was really never said that she was white

>>90824047
>>90822090

>>90822090
JKs own sketches show Hermione as white.

>>90824047
See
>>90824274

>>90824047

Man, just sayin, I'd fuck the shit out of that black Hermoine.

>>90816296
Why was there not more R34 of her?

She was one of my top 3 Macfarlane girls

>>90825160
because she's bland

>>90825296
when has that ever stopped porn artists?

>>90822562
Unless she literally painted her black face white there is no context that can make you right. Fuck off.

>>90825160
>Macfarlane
There's your problem.

>>90821034
that list makes no sense

>>90825436

It does if you assume its purpose is to make people angry on the internet.

>>90821034
>1984
When you have to skip an entire chapter just because how boring it was and you didn't miss a thing, it isn't a good book at all.

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>>90808945
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HRHhOXBGic

>>90825403
Some people can, some people can't.

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>>90825695
Glad I'm not the only one who sees this.

>Get 2/3 through the book
>Suddenly Orwell has us read a massive exposition bomb about the backstory of the major nations of the world along with one of the characters in real time
>This goes on for like 50 pages

What editor read that shit and decided that it was a good idea worth keeping in the story?

>>90828053
Whats up with Star always putting stuff in her mouth? Does she have a problem?

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>>90821123
I'd call her hot as fuck.

>>90821034

Holy shit, I can't believe you made it to /co/!

>>90808945
Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee

>>90808945
It's just what happened with Paige and Xavier Woods but with the races switched

>>90828637

I bought that story on paper and gave it to my friend on her birthday. God, good times, good times.

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>>90821463

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>>90828812

>>90821025
>she could be Jewish

I think the only confirmed Jew is Snape.

I never noticed how fucking awful JK's desciptions are until I was an adult.

>Indian girl called Parvati Patil
>professor big-nose mcGreasyJew

Fucling hell, she was lucky tumblr wasn't a thing back then

>>90828848
>n-no u
Brilliant /pol/ dialogue.

>>90828864
The Irish kid was named Seamus Finnigan and his spells blew shit up

You don't get much more Irish than that

>>90828989

Oh yeah, I forgot about him.

I really hate Rowling as a """writer""".

>>90828899
You do know that's actually black Hermione in the play, right?

>>90829046
She was decent at planning the long game but yeah it felt like a lot of characters were just picking some of the most stereotypical aspects of where they were from and calling it a day

>>90829091
>ecent at planning the long game

Not really. It all kinda fell apart after book four.

>>90829129
You mean the only book that actually needed split in two?

>all that hype for the World Cup
>Gilligan Cut to the after party
I'll never stop being salty...

>>90829181
*split into two films

>>90819577
She has like 11 of those mansions

>>90828989

Explosion Wizards are the best wizards. The only thing more irish than being an explosion wizard is being a javelin throwing wizard.

>>90829230
So it should be no problem then.

>>90821034
Nice pasta

>>90829181

Don't get me started on the movies, they are just retarded.

But the books are shitty in themselves. 1-3 were okay, but then they just went to shit.