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Valentine's Day

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Thread replies: 290
Thread images: 95

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Will you be treating your waifu to a special night this year /co/?
>>
>>89897078
oh god not this

even on an ironic level this is pathetic
>>
>>89897078

All the waifus in the world and you chose Unikitty?
>>
>>89897151
post a better one
you cant
>>
>>89897078
Nice choice of waifu anon. But for even attempting this you have flung yourself into a level of embarrassment and degeneracy beyond comprehension.
>>
>>89897078
>waifuing a fucking lego
Also timestamp plz
>>
>>89897192

>Meanwhile on /a/
>>
>>89897078
into the cringe folder it goes
>>
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>>89897078
Only you and me, baby.
>>
>tfw a kissless, unloved virgin with no waifu
how do you do it /co/?
how did you meet your waifu?
>>
>>89897331
You don't meet her, she meets you.
>>
>>89897078
>unikitty
>waifu
/mlp/ is a few boards down you faggot.
>>
>>89897109
>>89897151
>>89897241
>>89897274
>>89897462
>waifushaming
You should be ashamed of yourselves.
>>
I don't want a waifu.
>>
>>89897506
>waifushamingshaming
I think they're entitled to their opinion.
>>
>>89897078
>>89897151
>>89897171
>>89897462
>>89897506

>Made entirely of hard, smooth plastic
>Face is an ever-changing sticker; no contours or lips
>Body assembled from interlocking blocks with sharp corners and seams that could easily pinch the skin of your dick or outright tear it if you thrust to hard and fast

Unikitty is a waifu that functions better in theory than in practice.
>>
>>89897581
>Unikitty is a waifu that functions better in theory than in practice.

But anon, ALL waifus exist only in theory. That's what makes them waifus.
>>
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Hah! Joke's on you asshole, my waifu doesn't exist!

And I'm a sad, lonely man
>>
No, for some reason I just...feel nothing this year. Keep forgetting it's even a thing.

I have become emotionally numb to the entire holiday.
>>
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>>89897078
The same thing I do every night, Pinky. Try to have a lucid dream and fuck her there
>>
>>89897790
Just fuck Moose already. That sexual tension's been there for 6 years now.
>>
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>>89897704
>waifus exist only in theory

DELET THIS
>>
>>89897986

Beg pardon?
>>
>>89897704
>>89898019

>Reminder that if your waifu hasn't become real yet it's because you don't want her bad enough
>>
>>89897934
Any luck once?
>>
>>89898067
This desu
>>
>>89898067

I've tulpaed as hard as I can tulpa. I cannot tulpa any harder than this.
>>
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Who knows, we may even consummate our relationship.
>>
>>89898159
If you are trying to say you still failed, then you aren't even trying
>>
Protein powder and grilled chicken all after a hardy work out
>>
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>>89898215
>>
I'm probably just gonna numb myself into an emotional coma for the day while I regret not asking out a girl from work for tomorrow who has been pretty blatant about having a thing for me. She's too fucking good for me and I'm scared of fucking shit up with her and the group of friends we hang out with. Sorry for the blog, but it's hard for me to talk about personal shit with people.
>>
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>>89898067
>>Reminder that if your waifu hasn't become real yet it's because you don't want her bad enough

I once fucked a lifesized stuffed display doll of Sally from The Nightmare Before Christmas in the backroom of a video store when I had to close by myself.

That was as close as I ever came to making my waifu real and I was not proud of myself afterward.
>>
>>89898215
At least be classy and go to Dairy Queen.
>>
>>89898089
At this point have lucid dreams about once a week, still have trouble "summoning" persons. There was a couple of rather lewd ones, but they didn't involve mah waifu
>>
>>89898335
Ask her out, you fucking pussy.
>>
>>89898346
I need more details. This sounds amazing and I'm also jelly as fuck.
>>
>>89898335
Anon, You won't fuck it up. If you were good enough to get her to flirt with her, you're good enough to ask her out. Even if you fuck it up, she'll pass it off. Do it
>>
>>89898346

Well, that's closer than most anons get to fucking their waifu. And the fact that it was a stuffed doll would make her movie-accurate, at least.

But yes, anon, you should not be proud of what you've done and you'll have to carry the burden of that memory with you for the rest of your life.
>>
>>89898346

Ha, loser.

..........

I wonder if Capcom ever did that...
>>
It's like, on the one hand I'm a dateless, friendless virgin with the emotional and social intelligence of a 10-year-old despite being nearly 30, who will probably die in that state, and I can understand the desire for some kind of emotional intimacy even if it's entirely one-sided and borderline delusional.

Yet on the other hand, I feel like actually having a Valentine's dinner with Elsa would be crossing a line I'm nowhere near desperate enough to cross.
>>
>>89898346

Did the doll call you afterward? Did you ignore her calls? Did you break her plush heart?
>>
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>>89898346
... Well the important thing is everyone's okay.
>>
>>89898346
>THERE'S SOMEONE IN THE DOLL TODAY
>>
>>89898506
>I need more details.

You don't need that. Nobody needs that.

All I'll say is that after the holidays, we gave away display items to the employees as was standard practice. One of the managers for the Jack life-sized display doll. They gave me first offer to take the Sally one since I was next highest ranking.

I passed because dear god what did I do oh god.

In retrospect, those display dolls go for several thousand dollars on the aftermarket. I should have taken her home if not to fuck her but to sell her on eBay.

My life is nothing but a string of bad choices.
>>
>>89899024
>My life is nothing but a string of bad choices.

Posting on 4chan is one of them.
>>
>>89897078

Yes but why Unikitty?
>>
MFW This Thread.

Also, there is a bit missing from that cake.
>>
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>>89898346
Include me in the screencap.
>>
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>>89897078
>he hasn't made a plushie of his waifu to cuddle with
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>>89898346

Sally is a sentient human-size ragdoll.

You fucked a human-sized ragdoll made in the likeness of Sally.

That's pretty close, anon. You just missed the sentient part, so it's more like you fucked Sally's dead body.
>>
>>89900316
The chin is half the size of her head
>>
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You bet I will OP! Ash is 10/10
>>
>>89898346

No, anon. Stop. Just stop.
>>
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>>89901305
Unikitty's chin is pretty big as well.
>>
>>89897078
No I'll be crawling into a bottle tomorrow night as I lie in bed and think about the women in my life who have driven nails into my heart.
>>
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>>
>>89898346

At least you won't die a pillow virgin.
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>>89897704
"In Theory" implies that waifus can be proved to exist, tho.
>>
>>89897151
>and you chose Unikitty?

You don't choose your waifu you fucking newfag
>>
>>89903015

So are you saying that >>89898346 was actually raped by that Sally doll?
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>>89903057
Considering how terrible he says he felt afterwards, I'd argue that anon was indeed raped.
>>
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>>89897078
>yfw normal wife
>>
>>89897790

Reminder that Darkstalkers are Not Dead :^)

I'm still mad
>>
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>>89898346
>>
>>89903094
>Considering how terrible he says he felt afterwards, I'd argue that anon was indeed raped.

Horny plush girls are always trying to take advantage of naive anons.
>>
>>89903057

I was mostly complaining about the kinds of dipshits that act like they have seasonal waifus and just abandon them when the new hotness comes along but that works too
>>
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>>89898346
>I once fucked a lifesized stuffed display doll of Sally from The Nightmare Before Christmas in the backroom of a video store when I had to close by myself.
God dammit I expect this shit from /k/ or /v/
>>
>>89903149

Must be nice. I mean unless she's an evil bitch but that's not the impression I'm getting here.

>>89903243
The only thing sadder than people with waifus is people who care about faithfulness to waifus.
>>
>>89898346
Tell us about it anon.....
>>
>>89903057
>>89903094
>>89903205

>Go to work at Video Store USA
>Coworker calls out sick so it's just you
>You and the life size display doll of Sally setup at the front of the store
>As the day progresses, you notice she seems to be shifting positions whenever you aren't looking
>She always seems to be facing you, staring at you
>You reposition her to face the front of the store, assuming some customer is messing with her
>As you grab her thigh to swivel her back around, you hear an aroused giggle
>You dart up and look around, but there's no one else there
>The night shift wanes on and even though there have been no customers in the store for hours, the Sally doll keeps turning to face you whenever you take your eyes off her.
>When your back is completely turned to her while you stock the shelves, you hear more giggling, sighing and heaving
>You're starting to get freaked out and anxiously counting the minutes before close
>Closing time, you want to get out of there as fast as possible. You go to the front of the store, lock the doors and pull down the gate.
>As you bend over to latch the gate to the floor, you feel pinch on your buttocks, like someone just grabbed your ass and hear a feminine tiger growl
>You jump up and swing yourself around, backing into the gate. The only one there is the Sally doll and she seems a lot closer than she was a minute ago.
>You run to the backroom to count down the register and just get out of there.
>You finish counting the til, everything balances, you clock out on the time machine, grab your coat and rush to the office door to make your escape.
>You open the door and there she is, the Sally doll, standing there motionless in the doorway.
>You scream and back away as she stands there, still on her metal display stand, looking at you lifelessly. Someone must be playing a prank on you.
>Slowly, you try to creep around her and get through the door.
>>
>>89898346
The degeneracy is potent.
>>
>>89904386
Bad end.
>>
>>89898346
Why would you defile poor Sally like that?
>>
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>>89897078
>waifuing a slut

smuganimegrill.jpg
>>
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[bug noises]
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>>89904563
>Porn makes people happy
>Unikitty would be against porn
That comic is so out of character it hurts to read.
>>
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>>89898346
Oh, um, okay. Sharing is caring, I guess.

Blub blub.
>>
>>89904386

>Suddenly, her hand clutches your arm and her head turns to face you. She smiles and winks.
>Overcome with fear, you feel your knees wobble and go limp, your head gets woozy and you begin to slump to the floor in a faint.
>You never feel yourself hit the floor; soft, plush arms reach out and catch you, lifting you up before everything goes black.
>You awaken moments late. You can't move your arms or legs.
>Your vision focuses and you find that you're on the floor in one of the video aisles, your arms and legs and have been secured to the heavy metal racks with the zip ties you normally use to seal product bins.
>You can't break free. And now you're noticing that you've been stripped naked.
>You hear a female voice humming with delight.
>Terrified, you glance as far behind yourself as you can strain your neck.
>You see the Sally doll, also disrobed of her little patchwork dress. She is pulling the stuffing out of the plush toys from the merch aisle and cramming it into her bosom to enhance the size of her chest.
>Once she has reached D cups or so, she carefully sews the open fabric back up.
>She then turns toward you and sees you looking at her. She smiles and begins crawling on all fours toward you.
>You scream for help, but it's the small hours of the night and the rest of the shopping mall has been cleared out; no one can hear you and no one is coming to save you.
>The Sally doll climbs overtop of you. As her lower body passes your face, you can see that she used her needle, fabric and stuffing to make some cosmetic alterations to her crotch.
>There are now several soft, pillowy folds and a deep recess full of loose stuffing
>The Sally doll reorients herself and sits down on your chest.
>Your hyperventilating in terror now and, seeing this, she tries to calm you by rest her soft, fluffy, new ad improve rack on your face.
>You scream and scream, but your cries are muffled by the plush material.
>You then feel something equally soft grinding yo
>>
>>89904386
>>89904734

Why.
>>
>>89904386
>>89904734

There need to be more horror movies where the dolls come to life and suck your dick instead of stab you to death.

I'd watch that.
>>
>>89897762
>>89898770

Only real waifus in the whole thread, cartoon characters cant be waifus, and I suppose neither comic characters since a waifu by definition comes from Japanese 2D media.

Look what /a/nime fags think about your "waifus"

Happy February 14th /co/!
>>
>>89905238
Why are you here?
>>
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>>89898346
...Goddamn it anon.
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>>89898346
>>
>>89897078
Persona 5 stood me up, so no
>>
>>89904563
>>89904674
Wow you're right Fuck that guy.
>>
>>89906578
>not playing For Honor
>>
>>89906711
gotta backlog of other things to get through, wound up leaving MSGV shelved for a long while so I want to at least complete that before the revised P5 release
>>
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posting waifus i see
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>>89898346
>>89899024
Did you come inside it?

You did, didn't you?
>>
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>>89897078
I'll cook up some spaghetti
>>
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Post more waifu dates
>>
>>89906756
Why is Oppaicifica so special
>>
>>89906817

How could anyone waifu that...thing.
>>
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>>89897506
>>
>>89906966
>says the namefag with the slut waifu
>>
>>89904734
>She smiles and begins crawling on all fours toward you.
that sounds terrifying
>>
We should set up a collage.
>>
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>another Valentine's Day going to be spent alone in my room while I fap and eat pizza
It's moments like this where I'm glad various medications have left me emotionally neutered.
>>
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Spend a day with my actual waif, then spend a comfy night reading stories about my waifu.

It is a fucked world we live in my fellow /co/ goers.
>>
>>89904734
>>You then feel something equally soft grinding yo

Why did you stop midsentence anon?

Did the life-sized Sally doll come alive and get you? Oh shi
>>
>>89907774
m-maybe I can be your valentine, anon
>>
>>89898346

How? How the hell?!

I bet You just rubbed against that giant doll and came in your pants...
>>
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>>89898346

Look, I'm not saying I WOULDN'T a 1:1 scale doll of Sally if given the chance.

But I wouldn't tell another soul about for as long as I lived, not even on an anonymous image board for degenerate waifu-obsessed scum.
>>
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>>89898346

At least your waifu choice is not absolute trash.
>>
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>>89907993
>Still having a waifu even when married.

This should be illegal!
>>
>>89905238
>taking waifus seriously
>pot calling the kettle black
>>
>>89904386
>>89904734

This geentext sounds terrifying not titillating.
>>
>>89897078
I Contemplate suicide everyday.

But today is special because I contemplate suicide even more. It's a special day, where the high speed train is especially tempting.
>>
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>>89908446

Can't help it man. It's hard to quit a waifu when you've had her since you were a kid only to one day find out that /co/ decided to redo the character and they didn't fuck it up completely.
>>
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>>89906862

>tfw no Dakimakura of Char Noir

I even remember the threads before the show even aired outside of Korean and there was already someone selling them. Expensive as fuck as well, greedy gook.
>>
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No femanons or fags want to post their husubabdos?

inb4mostofthemwillbeYuriOrViktor
>>
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>>89907774
>various medications
ayy same, I'll take an extra one for you tonight
>>
>>89906817
>>89906966
>reminder that last year some guy on /a/ was a two timing scumbag who cheated on her with a horse
>>
>>89908550
This is bigamy, Anon! Hang your head in shame!

Also, blue dress > flannel.
>>
>>89907993
>>89908550

that ain't the ghost but I respect your taste

why do I have to have such a thing for ghosts and robots, why can't I just have a thing for "normal" (2D) girls
>>
>>89908637
>bigamy

What would you say if I told you the waif also found the waifu adorable and loveable? Would you call me mad? Would you call her insane? I also realize that tomorrow is Val's day which means there will probably be a Spook thread opening up soon... well time to watch the hate bomb blow up.
>>
Not really, but depending on how things go, might be taking her to first base. If you know what I mean.
>>
>>89908688
I say you both should hang your heads in shame!
We better not have one, or I'm charging the mound. And this is coming from a fellow GSfag.
>>
>>89908637

I know, its big a' me, too!

And big a' him! And her! And everyone in this room!
>>
>>89907774
>>89908625
>various medications
which ones

asking for a friend
>>
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>>89908868
>>
>>89905238
>cartoon characters can't be waifus

You take that back you son of a bitch. Insulting a man's waifu is a fucked up thing to do, and you really shouldn't be doing it. She's real to me dammit!
>>
>>89908964

Hey, you can't object to that joke, its a Marx Bros routine!
>>
>>89909050

Yes, but it was said by you, therefore it's like molding a pile of horse manure into a vague human shape and then saying it's based on Christ of the Abyss when it comes under scrutiny.

It doesn't hold up.
>>
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>>89908872
Abilify and recently started Seroquel. I guess perpetual numbness and the occasional bout of diarrhea is better than depression.
>>
>>89909305

What a lovely analogy.
>>
>>89908550
are you the autist that keeps making ghoul school threads
>>
>>89908688
is your wife also autistic
>>
>>89909561


Nah sorry bro not me.
>>
>>89909332
That's alright. I get constipated easily and emotional numbness sounds better than anxiety and alcoholism.
>>
>>89904734
Finish it you bastard
>>
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>>89898346
>>
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>>89908621
There is a severe lack of husbandos in this thread.
>>
>>89908630

At least it was best horse
>>
>>89904734
if this doesn't get an ending I'm gonna kill someone
>>
>>89904734
>>89912767
>U.
>>
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>>89904734

Welp
>>
>>89912017

cartoon characters are disgusting.
>>
>>89912983
Fortunately, Valentine's Day is the easiest day to get laid. Thus anyone who cares enough can put the cartoon lust behind them once and for all.
>>
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>>89913083

It is time to dump your ugly cartoon waifu and get an actual beautiful Anime waifu.
>>
>>89908621
Sure thing, fag.
>>
>>89912983

Saying the anon posting on the cartoon thread from a Hungarian .gif board
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aa1KA5jAcpg
>>
>>89898346
Is...is everything okay anon?
>>
>>89913116
I love you Nozomi! <3
>>
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>>89907774
>tfw no more medication
>painfully sober and aware of the fact that I'm alone

Boy will today be great!
>>
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>Finished the fourth chapter to my fap fiction
>Feel happy rather than sad

Get creative or die crying
>>
>>89915182
d-does rping count as being creative?
>>
I'm a KV but today strangely I'm not really sad..Maybe because I've being depressed for exams and university but today I feel positive about them. This evening I will watch anime, think about my waifu and study while my younger brother will have a dinner in an expensive restaurant with his gf
>>
>>89912767

It's a Create Your Own Ending.

Does the Sally doll smother him with her pillowy tits?

Does she finish raping him and then go back to being a normal doll, leaving him chained up naked on the floor with a cum-soaked store display laying on top of him for the manager to find in the morning?

Do they live happily ever after?
>>
>>89898346
>>89904386
>>89904734

Romance is dead. 4chan killed it.
>>
>>89898346
Joke's on you, anon, Sally IS a life-sized doll. You basically fucked her corpse.
>>
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I choo-choo-choose her.
>>
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>>
So are we doing anything for /ck/ this year?
>>
Well, happy Eternal Virginity Day, /co/.
>>
>>89916286
Shut up, Boco.
>>
>>89916301

Alright.
>>
>>89898346

You saw an opening and you went for it, anon.

I'm proud of you.
>>
>>89916112
>Joke's on you, anon, Sally IS a life-sized doll. You basically fucked her corpse.

If you had the chance to make your waifu real, but only as a corpse, WOULD you?
>>
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>>89916509
No
>>
>>89916509

And now someone is gonna post that Princess Sally.

You know the one.
>>
>>89916509
>If you had the chance to make your waifu real, but only as a corpse, WOULD you?

Yes and then I would fuck her.
>>
>>89908872
Lexapro and ambien for when I can't sleep. Lexapro works like a charm but leaves you dead after a few weeks of taking it. Supposedly I'll feel better after a while
>>
>>89898346

This isn't why your mother and father created you.
>>
>>89897078

Has anyone found anymore pic like this on the interwebs
>>
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>>89897078
I'm only wondering why you chose not to just get her figure instead.
>>
>>89918625

Go to /a/. They have tons.
>>
>>89897078
What are they eating?
>>
>>89898346
what did you feel while doing it?
>>
>>89903149
>the average combo deck player
>>
>>89897078
I'll fly_ all night long.
>>
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>>89897292

More like cutesy wife
>>
>>89908630
Anyone have a screencap of that?
>>
>>89908030
>>89910222
>>89912767
>>89912797

Keep this thread alive a few more minutes and I'll finish it.
>>
>>89920653

Shouldn't be too hard but thx for finishing it
>>
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>>89920732
You wanna know what IS too hard?
>>
>>89920770

your mom
>>
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>>89897078
Nah, I have wait in order to rideher
>>
>>89920653
WELL?
>>
>>89904386
>>89904734

>You then feel something equally soft grinding your crotch
>The Sally doll is rippling her body like a wave forward, backward, up and down, vigorously massaging your penis with the soft, cushiony folds of her plush vagina.
>The rapid sanding motion of her fabric against the head of your penis, with the notches of thread making tiny bumps along the way, stimulates you against your will.
>You're terrified beyond the capacity for rational thought, screaming and screaming and screaming, but your penis mechanically, instinctually becomes erect as she works her body against yours
>Terror. But also a boner.
>The Sally doll begins moaning with pleasure as she gets more and more into the act.
>The Sally doll has been in the store since last Halloween; you realize that she's been watching you, staring at you, pining for you every day for almost a year.
>Primal, elemental, ethereal lust finally caused the Sally doll to will herself sentient the moment the stars aligned, she had you alone and she could at last make her move to take you.
>You stop screaming as you realize that the very forces of nature of conspired against you to place you in this predicament.
>You're in the fucking Twilight Zone and there's no way out.
>>
>>89921184

>PS not done yet
>>
>>89921184

>You clench your tearing eyes closed and turn your head away, hoping you'll make it through the night.
>You feel her comfy, felt-like fingers wrap around your chin and turn your face back up.
>Reluctantly, you open your eyes and see her staring down at you with bedroom eyes, the fabric patterns changing and fluctuating impossibly as she sighs.
>The Sally doll is biting her lip. Her overstuffed breasts heaving as she inhales deeply (even though she's just a doll and doesn't need to breath).
>She closes her eyes, puckers up and kisses you.
>Your fresh screams are muffled against her fabric lips.
>The Sally doll is trying to French you but her tongue feels like someone is jamming a rolled up washcloth into your mouth and rolling it around.
>Easily within the top three worst kisses you've ever had.
>You gasp for air as she releases your lips, but as soon as you get a lungfull, something else is in your face.
>The Sally doll is sitting on your face, now, grinding her plush vag against your mouth
>You feel like you're being suffocated by a pillow; you can't breath.
>The loose stuffing is soaking up your saliva and you're forced to use your tongue to maneuver it around so it doesn't fall down your throat and choke you to death.
>The more you lash your tongue around inside her, the more the Sally doll shrieks with delight and furiously twists and slams her soft cushion of a crotch against your tortured face.
>>
>>89921391

>Satisfied with this leg of the race, she removes her plush pussy from your face an instant before you black out.
>You wish you had lost consciousness, because the Sally doll isn't done with you yet.
>She snuggles her fabric vag against your own crotch, working your erect penis deep inside
>The Sally doll then lays down ontop of you, burying your face in her overstuffed bosom yet again.
>She takes her arms, made of nothing but fabric and stuffing, and ties them in around the back of your neck, securing your head.
>The Sally doll begins heaving and pulsating ontop of you as you struggle. Your nose is positioned in her cleavage just right so you can narrowly breathe, but the lack of oxygen is making you weak and your arms and legs are still fastly secured to the racks by the zip ties. You aren't going anywhere.
>As she heaves up and down, rapidly working your penis in and out of her plush pussy, saliva from when she forced you to eat her out reduces friction a little, but the sensation nevertheless feels like a rugburn on the head of your dick
>Easily within the top three worst lays you've ever had.
>Top two.
>This is horrifying and unpleasant and you won't it to stop.
>>
>>89921649

>Finally, the Sally doll is done and collapses onto to you in sighing pleasure.
>All the time you've spent thrashing has paid off and weakened the zip ties. The one on your right arm snaps as you twist it, giving you the leverage to snap the one on your left arm, then your legs.
>Leaping to your feet, you yank the Sally doll off of you, uncoiling her arms that were lashed around your neck, securing her to you.
>You run toward the front of the store, still in the buff. You don't care if you get arrested, you just want to escape.
>Meer yards from the gate, your feet plant themselves against the floor and won't lift. Your legs feel wobbly and limp and stop working altogether.
>You look over your shoulder and see the Sally doll traipsing casually after you with a smile and a knowing look on her face.
>Terrified, you try to pull at your legs to get them moving, but your arms don't work anymore, either.
>You look at your skin and see the texture change. It looks like fabric. Loops of thread emerge and you start to feel lighter and lighter, as if all of your insides were being transmuted into stuffing.
>You can't move at all anymore and begin to fall backward.
>You're caught midair by the Sally doll. Holding you off the ground, she looks you in the eyes and grins devilishly with love.
>You're helpless as she carries you into the backroom and places you in an obscurely tucked away box labeled "Halloween decorations.
>She crawls into the box after you, closes the lid and cuddled up with you.
>You cannot move. Day after day, week after week, month after month, you hear your coworkers walking and talking around the backroom. At one point, you even hear the police asking questions, investigating your disappearance.
>But you cannot scream. All you can do is lay there in that box, unblinking, staring into the eyes of the Sally doll as she stares back at you with a loving smile. Forever.
>The End.
>>
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>>89904386
>>89904734
>>89921184
>>89921391
>>89921649
>>89921899
>>
>>89921969

It's not pornographic because he's fucking a pillow.
>>
>>89921899

Alternate ending should have had him escaping, quitting the video store, going to work at a toy store, and then one night while closing alone, he notices the lifesized Kanga plushie giving him the bedroom eyes. His nightmare only having just begin.
>>
>>89921184
>>89921391
>>89921649
>>89921899

Your insane weirdness has scared away everyone else in this thread, even the psychos that were going on virtual TV screen dates with lego animals.

Bravo.
>>
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>>
>>89916393
He certainly did
>>
Everything in this thread makes me want to kill myself.
>>
>>89921899
That was both great horror and great smut at the same time. Bravo
>>
>>89921899

I fapped so I guess it was ok.

"Sexy creepypasta" isn't my preferred pornographic subgenre, however.
>>
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>>89922478
>>
>>89922918
Cant handle when anon is happy with her waifu
>>
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WHERE IS THE HOLIDAY LANTERNS THREAD!?
>>
>>89904386
>>89904734
>>89921184
>>89921391
>>89921649
>>89921899

Why do people write these greentext porno stories?

They can't be saved and so within 24-48 hours they're erased after the archive ditches them. It's a lot of work for something entirely disposable.
>>
>>89923255
Some writers will pastebin their stuff.
>>
>>89898346
Normally I'd be disgusted but I've seen worse posted on /mlp/.

Step up your degeneracy game, boy
>>
>>89923255
>>89923290

I wrote the thing but since I dunno wtf a pastebin is or how to use it I guess it was nothing more than a disposable lewd.

Like the tissues you use to clean yourself up with after reading.
>>
>>89923354
>Like the tissues you use to clean yourself up with after reading.

I didn't cry that much.
>>
>>89907170
Like on her hands and knees, not like a fucking spider.
>>
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>>89921184
>>89921391
>>89921649

That was unique I got a boner from it

I mean I've never read horror porn before till now
>>
>>89923686

I'm just glad it didn't turn into guro shit like most of them do.

Not muh fetish.
>>
>>89897078
I'd make fun of you for having a Lego waifu, but mine's a blue imp with a hammer so I can't say much.
>>
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>>89921899
>that's my fetish
>>
>>89923109
>"Sexy creepypasta"

That explains all the spelling and grammatical errors.
>>
>>89897078

Is it weird I find these style pictures with people putting food in front of a computer screen with their waifu on it to be cute?
>>
>>89897078
>>89898346

This is why white people are going extinct.
>>
>>89921899
Are you the one who wrote that Gruftine fic in Christmas of 2015?
>>
>>89923931

No.

Muh first green text lewd.
>>
>>89923986
Well you did a good job.
>>
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>She will never be real
I-I guess it's for the best, she probably has spikes in her vagina, or keep you up all night while incoherently screaming in her sleep
>>
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>>89923805
>>>/v/

Also posting best waifu.
>>
>>89923986
>Muh first green text lewd.

What satisfaction do you get from giving boners to strangers and helping them masturbate?

Do you ever picture them in your mind's eye, jacking off furiously in front of their monitors while reading your green text?

Don't create these things.
>>
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>>89905238
all japanese 2d girls look the same (hourglass/big balloon tities/pastel hair or natural/the mentality of a 6 year or tough girl with a dark past or psycho for bf) or loli /thick for fetish stuff

with other words you're waifu is as original as a sonic/furry oc
>>
>>89924152
Ayy fuck you mang. Let the man do what he wants.
>>
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>>89924152
>>
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>>89924152
>>
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>>89897078
Not really, just gonna gather up cute,lewd, and/or funny pics of em and..I dunno throw them in the pile I guess.
>>
>>89924152
[muffled autistic screeching in the distance]
>>
>>89922918
>Everything in this thread makes me want to kill myself.

Don't do it or else some anon might have sex with your corpse in the backroom of a video store.
>>
>>89904386
>>89904734
>>89921184
>>89921391
>>89921649
>>89921899

If I have sex with a stuffed animal in a public place will /co/ reward me with a greentext biography of my exploits?
>>
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>>89898346
Makes me legit wonder if this counts as losing your virginity or not
>>
>>89925490
It doesn't, you have to fuck a real, living human being to count as losing your virginity
>>
>>89898346
>>89899024
>All I'll say is that after the holidays, we gave away display items to the employees as was standard practice. One of the managers for the Jack life-sized display doll. They gave me first offer to take the Sally one since I was next highest ranking.
>I passed because dear god what did I do oh god.

If she was truly your waifu and you loved her you would have kept her.

That should be your true regret. Your true shame.
>>
>>89925490
Nah it's just like he used a masturbation aid.
>>
>>89921899

That's some horrifying EC comics ending shit right there.
>>
>>89898346

Pics of Sally doll? How movie-accurate was it?
>>
>>89925538
>>89925546
>>89925490

But to you, your waifu is real.

The love you feel is real, anon.
>>
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>>89926322
>>
>>89897109
Doesn't seem that bad, they're not hurting anyone and they seem happy.

My life would probably be better if I could be emotionally supported by a fictional character.
>>
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>>89898346
im done
>>
>>89921899
>>You're caught midair by the Sally doll. Holding you off the ground, she looks you in the eyes and grins devilishly with love.
>>You're helpless as she carries you into the backroom

Boi-oi-oi-oi-oing.
>>
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>>89904386
>>89904734
>>89921184
>>89921391
>>89921649
>>89921899
>>89924152
>>
>>89927529

>You read the whole thing

>You could have stopped at any time

>But you read the whole thing anyway
>>
>>89927549

This is the Hell we make for ourselves.
>>
>/a/ and /mlp/ have better waifu walls than us right now
Step. It. Up.
>>
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>>89927549
i know...
>>
>>89927641
>Step. It. Up.
He said, posting Loud House garbage.
>>
>>89927641

Who said we need a waifu wall?
>>
>>89927697
Since when has /co/ started hating the Loud House?
>>
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>>89898346
Good one m8.
>>
>>89927728

Its pretty much the SU fans
>>
>>89927728
I hated it since the beginning.
>>
>>89927742

>Thinking he was joking

You underestimate just what depravity people will confess to on an anonymous image board.
>>
>>89905238
>People actually take this shit seriously.

Who touched you as a child?
>>
>>89927641
>/co/ waifu wall

You idiot, do you want to break 4chan?
>>
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>All these anons claiming they WOULDN'T a Sally

What are you people? Gay?
>>
>>89928135

Did the life sized doll look that good?
>>
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>>89928135

If I saw her and she looked like that I'd probably do it also
>>
>>89928135
Doesn't she have a cock in this picture?
>>
>>89929139

Nope. But her vag is fleshy not plushy and I don't approve of that.
>>
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>>89928135
If Sally was your undead GF, what body parts, and from who, would you have Sally "reap" for her own body?
Pic related was a delivery from a prompt with that same concept.
>>
>>89929504
She's not undead; she's a literal doll
>>
>>89923424
Nigger, this is a fucking living plush doll, the only way it would move would be like a spider.
>>
>>89927751
>Su fans
>implying that it isn't falseflaggers
/sug/ could give less of a shit about TLH.
Not saying that it's bad, though.
>>
>>89928135

So ah sauce plz Google can't into cropped images for some reason
>>
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Hell, if we are posting cringe pics I may as well put my OC before this day ends...
>>
>>89929766

It's a divide and conquer tactic, we should be more united...
>>
>>89930498
No wonder you're alone. You're fat.
>>
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>>89930498
>>
>>89930498
>>89930727

Great. We're officially /a/ now.
>>
>>89930204
>sauce

>http://rule34-data-009.paheal.net/_images/f248b9c8f28750959a464c753502439c/1462760%20-%20Nightmare_Before_Christmas%20Sally%20Soulstealer666.png
>>
>>89930938
There's a version of that without a cock?
>>
>>89930938

Thx senpai
>>
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>>89908621
>>
>>89919627
Talespin? Rebecca Cunningham?
>>
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>>89931755
Planes can be waifus.
>>
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>>89932127
oh, yeah I know...
>>
>>89920593
I wish I saved it.
>>
>>89932640
Same
>>
>>89908621
>tfw dyke
Who's the best canon pussy lover?
>inb4 su/korra
get out, they're already taken anyways
>>
>>89898215
At least take her to burger king instead.
>>
>>89932640
Let's see if I did it right

>>>/a/153421293
>>
Perfect Day
>>
>>89934636

Your waifu is shit.
>>
>>89934295
I genuinely can't tell if those replies are serious. is /a/ really serious about waifus?
>>
>>89934636
>KFC buenisimo
latino or spanish
>>
>>89933915
There's lots of them on /a/
>>
>>89934719
You're shit

Also, shut the hell up Boco.
>>
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>>89935904

Boko Haram?
>>
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>>89934636

Posting Anime in a cartoon and comics thread is EXTREMELY Haram, may fire rain over your house, over your sheep, because me Motumbo, is going to make rain bullets, bullets of Justice, Just like the prophet Muhammad said "once you go black, you never come back" you will neither come back my friend.

Come on and slam, and welcome to the Jam.

peace.
>>
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>>89897078
>waifuing Unikitty
>>
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>>89937949
>Not waifuing Unikitty
>>
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>>89908550
>>89907993
You have to link a folder or something anon, I can tell you have some quality stuff
Thread posts: 290
Thread images: 95


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