RIVERDALE

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>>88544003
Why is it all dark and ominous looking?

>Moose hooking up with Kevin Keller

But the milfs...

I feel cheated.

>>88544121
Because it's supposed to be a pastiche of "Twin Peaks", according to the producers.

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>>88544003
This can't be more fucking CW if they tried

I remember when CW had a string of "limited events" murder shows that run 8 episodes. Those were comfy

Hidden Palms! That's the name!

>>88544003
Ok, I'm not too familiar with Archie but this all seems totally wrong. They're all supposed to be schlubs and girls next door types, right? And, above all else, it's a comedy. Not a foreboding crime drama.

And Archie's hair, goddamn. That poster looks like a really bad photoshop job, but it looks just as bad in the videos. Couldn't get an actual ginger, because gingers aren't sexy enough to be the lead on a CW show I guess.

>>88544003
It's gonna be a train wreck, but the question is will it be a entertaining train wreck? I hope so, because I do plan on hate watching.

>>88544172
okay
why?

>>88544134
>Moose hooking up with Kevin Keller
Where the fuck did you get that from? Archie fucks his teacher in the trailer.

Apparently there are going to be some incestuous vibes between Jayson and Cheryl, but he gets murdered.

Also apparently in episode 7 they have a sleepover and Veronica and Betty kiss.

>>88544172
The thing about Twin Peaks is that it had that small town charm overlay.

This just seems to be all grouse.

Also not enough Ethel

>>88544352
They're the ones that find Jason's body in the trailer, and reviews did say Kevin finds an "unexpected hookup" in the tail end of the first episode.

Also there's a Betty/Veronica kiss in the first episode already, so they'll probably be lezzing it up a few times at least.q

Fuck it, why not

>>88544364
It's a joke of a joke. I mean, you have Jughead as a Noir-ish omniscient narrator throughout the whole thing.

>>88544003

Why is Josie black? Is Valerie white?

They do realise that this is FUCKING ARCHIE, right?

>>88544417
Is that so?

Then I hope there's a bunch of Ethel.

Jughead and Big Ethel is the best pairing.

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>>88544418
They're all black.

>>88544003
so what is there deal? witches?(I know nothing about this IP)

>>88544448
Ethel is confirmed for three episodes at least, played by Barb from STRANGER THINGS.

Also Molly Ringwald is playing Archie's mother.

>>88544003
>That dark ominous music
>Violent teen drama fights
>Implication that Archie is a lone wolf character
>Utilizing Vampire Diaries as an association for the show
>Archie being muscular and ripped

I just don't understand. This is literally Tristar Godzilla tier adapting.

>>88544448
>not jughead/burgers
take that designated off your name right now you dont deserve it

>>88544466
Damn, only three?

I think that one way to have fun with this is to have her tag along with Jughead, undercutting the seriousness of it all.

>>88544482
It's from Aguirre-Sacasa.
I know people like Afterlife and Sabrina...but it's par for the course.

>>88544488
Don't you see?
They should SHARE the burgers.

>>88544464
"Archie" is a wholesome 1950's comic series about wholesome 1950's teenagers getting into wholesome 1950's shenanigans. The core conflict is usually the love triangle between everyman Archie, girl next door Betty and sexy rich girl Veronica.

The show is basically making a noir pastiche murder mystery out of it. They're teens in a seemingly wholesome 1950's-esque small town, but everyone has DARK SECRETS and MYSTERIOUS AGENDS 'n shit.

>>88544392
>unexpected hookup
Jughead has already been rewritten as an emo, caffeine-holic (no hamboigas), so I wouldn't be surprised if they make him a fag too.

>Also there's a Betty/Veronica kiss in the first episode already, so they'll probably be lezzing it up a few times at least.q
As it should be.

>>88544519
>wholesome 1950's-esque small town

Except it's more of a Michigan-esque dreary town

>>88544392
>Also there's a Betty/Veronica kiss in the first episode already, so they'll probably be lezzing it up a few times at least.q
>this is the only possible universe where betty and veronica will hook up
all I'm asking for is a one shot book archie. have archie get with cheryl while ronnie and betty realize they want each other more than him

I'm surprised they gave Jughead his hat.

>>88544500
Ethel is hooking up with someone else in the show.

They kinda' made it sound like she's a lesbian, so it's either that or Archie will bone her too. He's already getting with Betty, Veronica, Ms. Grundy and Josie at different points in the show.

>>88544569
Truly the worst

what about true best girl? midge?

>>88544451
muh dik famalam

>>88544569
>Archie actually getting play
>not a hapless virgin constantly being cucked
Not much Archie

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>As a new school year begins, the town of Riverdale is still reeling from the recent, tragic death of golden boy Jason Blossom. The summer's events have made local teen Archie Andrews (KJ Apa) realize that he wants to pursue a career in music and not follow in his father Fred's (Luke Perry) footsteps in the construction business, and he sets up to strike a partnership with snooty classmate Josie McCoy (Ashleigh Murray), the frontwoman of the popular band Josie & The Pussycats. Also weighing on his mind is his fractured friendship with sullen heartthrob Jughead Jones (Cole Sprouse) and his forbidden liaison with music teacher Geraldine Grundy (Sarah Habel).

>Meanwhile, girl-next-door Betty Cooper (Lili Reinhart) is anxious to see her crush Archie after being away all summer, but she's not quite ready to reveal her true feelings to him. When a new student, Veronica Lodge (Camilla Mendes), arrives in town from New York, there's an undeniable spark between her and Archie, even though Veronica doesn't want to risk her new friendship with Betty by making a play for him.

>Cheryl Blossom (Madeline Petsch), Riverdale's Queen Bee and Jason's twin sister, is happy to stir up trouble amongst Archie, Betty, and Veronica, but she is keeping secrets of her own. Specifically about her brother's mysterious death, secrets that Archie might be connected with. Archie's newfound popularity also earns him the enemity of the town prankster, Reggie Mantle (Ross Butler), who becomes hellbent on taking Archie down.

>Riverdale may look like a small, quiet town, but there is darkness hidden underneath the shadows, and as Archie and his friends venture further into its mysteries, its secrets are slowly brought to life.

I'm gonna watch it in a morbid way
Like how you look at a train kill people in a crash

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The character blurbs that often get posted.

ARCHIE ANDREWS (K.J. Apa)

>Archie is an intense and conflicted high school sophomore, who is still boyishly handsome but got pumped after working construction for his dad during the summer. He is grappling with heavy issues and juggling the unexpected interest of several girls while discovering his passion for writing and performing music against his father and his football coach’s better wishes. He harbors more than one dark, terrible secret.

>>88544635
The girl they have playing Miss Grundy is 34 and not even married. Even if Grundy is a spinster, they should've gotten at least a 40 year old milf to play her.

>>88544759
They should also get someone like Rob Lowe to play Weatherbee.

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BETTY COOPER (Lili Reinhart)

>Betty is a sophomore with self-esteem issues who hails from a dysfunctional family. Eager-to-please, wholesome and studious, she has long harbored a crush for her best friend, Archie. Tired of being the "perfect" everything, she turns to her new friend, Veronica, for life advice, and adopts a new attitude that results in friction with her domineering mother, Alice.

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VERONICA LODGE (Camilla Mendes)

>A silver-tongued stunner, Veronica has just returned to Riverdale from New York with her divorcee mother, following a scandal which resulted in her father going to prison. Extremely intelligent, self-confident and immediately popular, Veronica is a sophomore and is eager to reinvent herself — from Mean Girl to caring friend. She quickly develops an intense mutual attraction with Archie, but is reluctant to act on it due to her new friend Betty's own interest in him.

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CHERYL BLOSSOM (Madelaine Petsch)

>This fiery redhead is rich, entitled and never accountable. A manipulative mean girl who kills with kindness, she recently lost her twin brother Jason Blossom, with whom she shared a particularly close and intimate relationship, in a mysterious accident.

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>>88544003
>Grimdark
>Jughead is telling Archie not to talk about the dead kid
>Not eating dem burgers

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JUGHEAD JONES (Cole Sprouse)

>Jughead is a hearing-impaired, caffeine-addict, sullen heartthrob with a philosophical bent. The lanky lad is Archie’s former best friend, seeing as the two still are smarting from a rift that took place between them. Angry, Jughead refuses to take the olive branch being proffered by Archie, the hurt goes that deep. Jughead is also dedicated to uncover the mystery of Jason Blossom's death.

>>88544889
>Jughead is also dedicated to uncover the mystery of Jason Blossom's death.

As ridiculous as the rest is...this might be the only interesting bit

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REGGIE MANTLE (Ross Butler)

>The town prankster, Reggie is a wealthy and sarcastic sophomore who fashions himself as the big man on campus, feeling threatened by Archie's sudden popularity, Reggie vows to destroy his newfound nemesis.

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KEVIN KELLER (Casey Cott)

>Betty's cheerful, openly homosexual, quick-witted friend, Kevin struggles to mend fences with his conservative father, who refuses to accept his son's lifestyle, and is looking for love in all the wrong places.

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JOSIE McCOY (Ashleigh Murray)

>Josie is a gorgeous, snooty and ambitious sophomore, and the lead singer for popular band Josie and the Pussycats, which also includes her friends Valerie Brown and Melody Valentine. She has zero interest in recording any songs written by fellow teen Archie, but that won't stop him from trying.

Wtf I thought archie was about going to beach and having fun and shit

>>88544986
>http://imgur.com/a/vXQld
no it's about being brutally murdered by sharks and aliens

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VALERIE BROWN (Irie Hayleau)

>The ambitious, career-obsessed songwriter, bassist, and backup vocalist of the popular band Josie & The Pussycats, Valerie is the least receptive to Archie's efforts to collaborate with the group.

MELODY VALENTINE (Asha Bromfield)

>The cheerful and naive drummer of the popular band Josie and the Pussycats, always following Josie's lead.

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MOOSE MASON (Cody Kearsley)

>The star player of Riverdale High's football team, Moose becomes fast friends with Archie when he decides to join the team.

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DILTON DOILEY (Daniel Yang)

>The smartest kid in town, Dilton is one of Archie's classmates at Riverdale High.

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ETHEL MUGGS (Shannon Purser)

>An introverted student who is drawn into a friendship with Veronica and Betty after they team up for a revenge plot on Archie's rival, Reggie, Ethel comes into her own and develops a singular relationship with an unexpected someone.

I actually think this is gonne be really great, you can't have a show that's just >TWO GIRLS LIKE THIS GUY AND THERE'S THIS GUY WITH THE BURGERS

>>88544451

I'm claiming the one on the left, muh dick.

>>88544975
>>88545049
Josie and the Pussycats is now a Destiny's Child ripoff

STAY OUTTA RIVERDALE!

>>88544003

No. Archie hasn't been cool since...

Actually they've never been cool. Like, ever.

Even if it had been cool, the forced diversity / PC pandering makes it a no-show for me.

Yeah. I'm gonna pass on grimdark Archie. Afterlife with Archie is good enough...

hope it can sate me until real twin peaks is back

>>88544519
So basically Derry?

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TINA PATEL (Olivia Ryan Stern)

>Cheryl's vicious best friend and second-in-command, Tina will stop at nothing to become the resident queen bee of Riverdale High.

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GINGER LOPEZ (Caitlin Mitchell Markovitch)

>One of Cheryl's cronies, Ginger comes off as ditzy and airheaded, but might know more about the seedy going-ons at Riverdale than it appears.

>>88545075
God damn that jawline, that's the best damn casting choice of them all.

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I'm first in line, motherfuckers. Shit's gonna be tight.

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I would have slapped a red wig on Clint Howard and called it a day. Probably why I'm not the casting guy on this show.

>>88544889
>not a single mention of humor in jughead's entire character description

>>88544889
Holy shit, one of the twins.

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FRED ANDREWS (Luke Perry)

>Archie's father, Fred is a generally easygoing owner of the family construction company, who hopes Archie will take over the business one day. However, he is not without skeletons in his closet.

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MARY ANDREWS (Molly Ringwald)

>Archie's mother, Mary left Riverdale two years ago to follow her dreams, but returns in her family’s hour of need. She not only reconnects with Archie and her husband, Fred, but also her former high school friends Hermione Lodge and Alice Cooper.

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>>88544003

Duhh stay out of Riverdale.

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HAL COOPER (Lochlyn Munro)

>Betty's father, Hal is supportive in contrast to Alice's demanding nature, but disapproves of Betty's blossoming relationship with Archie.

>"from the network that brought you Gossip Girl and The Vampire Diaries"
>not associating the show with actual comic book stuff -- not even iZombie

kek. It's gonna suck. More than that, it's not going to be like the comics at all. Riverdale isn't meant for you, my friends.

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ALICE COOPER (Madchen Amick)

>Betty's distant, emotionally brittle mother, Alice is a succesful newspaper publisher and has a tempestuous relationship with her daughter, upon whom she imposes exceedlingly high expectations.

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HERMIONE LODGE (Marisol Nichols)

>Veronica's seductive, equally silver-tongued mother, who returns to Riverdale in search of new and better prospects after he husband's scandalous imprisonment.

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SIERRA McCOY (Robin Givens)

>Josie's mother, Sierra is the mayor of Riverdale and is determined to protect the town's image, which becomes difficult in light of the murder of one of its favorite sons.

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GERALDINE GRUNDY (Sarah Habel)

>A dedicated but lonely music teacher at Riverdale High, Ms. Grundy soon finds herself in a forbidden relationship with Archie, one of her students, one that she is determined to maintain a secret no matter what.

>>88545738
>>88545702
>>88545681
>>88545648
whoever wants to bang milfs has good taste desu

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POP TATE (Alvin Sanders)

>The soulful and humorous owner of the local hangout place that attracts the teens of Riverdale, Pop is always ready to lend a helping hand to the kids.

>>88545789
>Ms. Grundy
>looking like that
>Ms. Grundy
>in a relationship with Archie
I'm not sure if I like this or not.

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POLLY COOPER (Tiera Skovbye)

>Betty's edgy, rebellious older sister who returns to Riverdale after moving away for college.

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OSCAR (Raul Castillo)

>A successful songwriter from New York who accepts a position as a visiting professor at Riverdale's Carson College, and agrees to audition Archie in the hopes of possibly mentoring the aspiring singer-songwriter.

>>88545789
>Miss Grundy
>Not Jane Lynch
meh

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BOSS (Skeet Ulrich)

>The leader of the Southside Serpents, a gang of dangerous criminals that live and operate on the fringes of Riverdale. He has a mysterious connection to Jughead.

I wanna make CW Bingo but i'm just too creative. This has a great combo of too attractive CW stars, stunt casting, and it's plots like the student and teacher fucking that make it CW

>>88545815
I though I recognized him, but I've never seen anything he's been in.
Although he was Mr. Popo in the Canadian dub of DBZ.

>>88545815
Well I don't mind this much but I wish he has a bit more facial hair.

>>88545789
It's Aunt May all over again.

>>88545669
>as if iZombie is like the comics

>>88545942
Is this guy from the comic??

>>88546000
I don't see the problem

>>88544172
I got more excited watching David Lynch eating a donut for 20 seconds today than I did for any of the advertising surrounding this show.

>>88545669
Who the fuck reads Archie enough to want a comic accurate portrayal
We're not in the great depression

>>88546069

well yeah that has 25 years of build up

>>88545669
The closest comic to this would be the flashback panels of Archie's Afterlife series.

>>88545738
Umm...they didn't photoshop that woman's nipple out?

>>88545466
>Fool everyone into thinking Twin Peaks
>It's actually IT
CW is not THAT clever

>>88545942
>Molly Ringwald
80's
>Skeet Ulrich
90's

This show is a blast from the past.

>>88546387
CW doesn't have the balls to portray a character like Bowers or fucking Patrick. Could you even imagine the meltdown people would have? And that's before we get into that one infamous scene.

>>88546578
CW has no problem with violence, THE 100 is edgy as fuck.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aOb6SvwS49w

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WbVJoeQzf8g

Disturbing sexual content, though, they really don't go there.

>>88546697
Man I'm hyped for The 100 s4.

>>88544003
I hope every talkback thread gets moved to /tv/ just like the Lucifer threads.

>>88546812
Me, too. Although...

>It's a "Arkadia is taken over by radicals" story arc

>>88544482
Archie being ripped is that only thing that's there in the comics to be fair.

>>88546697
I admit that I only started watching that show because I wanted to see the lead's rack, then got shocked by how brutal it quickly got. I never would have thought i'd be seeing well designed crucifixions by season 3

>>88547657
I remember getting into it because 4chan told me about the lesbian love being a rip off of Smallville Superman and Lex
Which I do see where they are coming from. Clarke and Lexa? Talk about subtlety

>>88547965
I have seen people complain about that whole arc being rushed (I can't tell if you are being sarcastic about the subtlety of it), but having re-watched season 2 with that in mind, nearly every scene has Lexa having love-eyes with Clarke. Even in that episode with the shitty CGI gorilla, Lexa was constantly staring at her

>>88548145
I mean the subtlety of Lex Luthor wanting to fuck Superman in the ass

>>88545956
>>88545815
>Hiiiii, redheaded maggot

>>88544003
This looks so joyless. I just want the adventures of a clueless redhead and his harem, and also his burger-loving best friend.

>>88544003
MMM WHATCHA SAAYYY

>>88544003
No, i won't because they couldn't possibly make some thing archie related this awful.

Archie has had stuff that was somewhat dark and serious but this? Fuck them

[spoiled]First i find Ben Reilly was ruined as far as any future appearance he will make and now this shit, today was not a fun day[/spoiler]

>>88544364
>The thing about Twin Peaks is that it had that small town charm overlay.

Which was a facade because all types of shady shit was happening all over the place, from teenage prostitution, drug smuggling, serial killings, blackmail, etc. Same thing applies to Riverdale. It seems idyllic, but that's all it is. Shiny exterior.

I might have been conned into watching this if they had an actual ginger Archie, but no dice.

Looks wretched.

>>88549818
Kinda missed the second part there.

Is that yeah, it's an overlay, a facade...but this doesn't seem to have even that.

>>88545467
>Indian character
>played by some seemingly black bitch
C'mon you fucking faggots.

It's not even the fact that this is a different interpretation or a standard CW brooding fest. It's the fact that Archie is full of albeit basic, yet diverse personalities, and this show makes it seem like every single character is the same.

Archie is a heartthrob. Fucking JUGHEAD is a heartthrob (yet they let him keep the goofy hat,) and fucking Ms. Grundy for fuck's sake. Oh and Archie's fucking her too, unless those descriptions got mixed up. Fuck's sake.

Veronica is a stuck up bitch. Josie is a stuck up bitch (apparently so is Valerie.) Cheryl is a stuck up bitch. Tina Patel is a stuck up bitch. Even Betty seems like she's more of a bitch if it'll win her Archie. Oh yeah, Reggie is another rich stuck up bitch.

Speaking of Cheryl & Tina, and their third Ginger: one boss bitch, one under bitch, and one ditz - sounds a lot like the description for the new Pussycats. Maybe if Melody actually acts like Melody, but they scream stereotypical black girl group to me, which is basically every girl wants to be the star, despite looking and sounding practically the same.

The adults are either angry blowhards or fragile dream chasers. Snore.

Frankly, despite all that, I'm interested, but the first episode better deliver something better than that lezzie kiss.

>>88544003
ill probably ignore it then start watching when sabrina shows up

>>88544868
TWINCEST?! Picked the fuck up. Obviously she killed her brother

I just hope theres's a little bit of humour and levity in this show. Just something please.

>>88550068
I am legit hoping that the Sabrina/Cult rumor is true.

>>88545484
>half-flip half-jewish

>>88544325
Because they missed the gilded nature of the clean cut Twin Peaks surface.

Went straight for the creep. Hell Deadly Premonition played that better.

>>88544451
So is the lightskinned one the one who plays the one who was black in the original comics? Because that would be funny.

>>88544451
Which makes it even more confusing Archie trying to get into their band.

>>88545089
>cast asian kid as the smartest kid

>>88544466
Sweet anything with more of her is grand. More time to get out there and make herself known for Squirrel Girl possibilities.

>>88544392
Hookup IIRC is going to be Fred Andrews (Luke Perry)

Good or bad, it'll be fun to watch it with /co/.

>>88551167
He wants to write their songs. Black artists often have white songwriters and vice-versa.

>>88545623
why'd they make archie's dad hot

They could have made a sitcom, why couldn't it be a sitcom?

>>88544975
>>88545049
this is just stupid. The trio has already a black member, so why change Josie and Melody?

>>88553091
to be Progressive™

>>88551183
They also cast an Asian kid as the douchebag rich kid

>>88550914
Sabrina cult rumor?

>>88552849
Stranger Things was released too late to show that they could've cashed in on making an HS series set in the past.

Also there are way too many sitcoms set in the present these times.

>>88545882
Damn that's one hell of a resurrection. Is Chic going to make an appearance too?

Though to be fair the early Little Archie stuff was badass.

>>88544003
DAAAAH STAY OUTTA RIVERDALE

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>she recently lost her twin brother Jason Blossom, with whom she shared a particularly close and intimate relationship

>>88544003
So that dye job is "intended" to look terrible right

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I fucking hate the CW and their formula, they're like a parody of themselves at this point. It baffles me that people still give any of their shows any attention at this point.

How can anyone unironically see anything produced by that network in the last decade and say, "Yeah, this is good, quality television!" with a straight face?

>>88557336
Let go of your butthurt. Their shows are fun.