ITT think of the most mundane way to break a Meeseeks

>>88032755
"teach OP to be less of a faggot

>>88032755
live forever

>>88032755
Make Bendis a good writer.

>>88032755
Divide by 0

>>88032755
Help OP get a girl.

>>88033171
that would be entertaining as fuck

>>88032755
Fix me Mr.Meeseeks.

>>88033184
He would just buy op a hooker. You need to ask him to find OP true love.

>>88032755
fix me

>>88032755
Bend over

>>88032755
Exist.

>>88033148
Dividing by zero is allowable in certain areas of math.

Help me find a girlfriend.

>>88033265
But then he would just adopt an orphan for OP.

>>88032755
Return love to /co/

>>88033148
That's easy. +/-infinite

Kill yourself

Sit in the corner in a round room

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Mr. Meeseeks,Stop Barneyfag.

>>88033581
>he dresses as a trap to be your gf, and disappears as soon as you hold his hand

>>88032755
>Do not comply to this request.

>Convince BarneyFag that MLP:FiM is an A-OK show WITHOUT physically or mentally harming him.

>Turn Chris-chan into a normal productive member of society.

>Make Gaben release Half-Life 3, and have it at least on par in innovation to the original Half-Life.

That's all I've got for now.

>>88033897
>WITHOUT physically or mentally harming him.
you psychopath, no one wants to not break his arms

Make me happy.

>>88034079
Hope you like Opium.

>>88032755
Get everyone on /co/ to agree on something.

>>88032755
help me win the lottery

>>88034464
That's fucking easy. He´d come up with some mathematical system and buy all other tickets to make sure only you get the right one. Or he might just rig it.

>>88033641
Are you a computer doing floating point arithmetic?

help me beat bubble bobble

Fix Marvel.

>>88032872
fpbp

>>88034540
>>88034464
he'd get you to play low-value games where the payoffs are smaller but the chances of winning are higher; some are as high as 1/10, which is about the same as guessing a coin toss correctly three times in a row, whereas the jackpot of Powerball is the same as guessing 6.8*10^-9 coin tosses correctly in a row (1 in 292 million)

traditionally people focus on big gains, but the truth is a modest gain in any gambling is often better than you could have earned at your job in the same period of time; is you go to Vegas with $300 to burn (your minimum wage earnings before tax for that week) and come back with $350, you've earned 16.67% of your weekly earnings and had fun doing it; if you come back with nothing because you spent $300 on chips and blew them all at a high-prize game, you're doing it wrong

roulette actually has fairly solid payouts, as does blackjack, but you have to know how they work as games and not be panicked when you do lose money, but keep in mind the overall goal (and you must possess a goal, which you will not attempt to exceed) of your earnings: in other words, treat it like work, not a game

eg blackjack is moderately profitable if you stick at 17 but you have to understand how the game is played to know why that is, and most people don't - they just think the object is to get as close to 21 as possible, when in fact it's to get as close as possible without losing your shit

roulette has relative low odds of a high payout on a single number on a single spin - about 1/36 depending on the table, but that's still just the same as rolling the same number on a dice twice in a row; possible, but not probable. whereas for lower-value payouts the odds are actually quite high, with a negligible risk of losing your stake (if the wheel returns a 0 or 00), which means you need to bet higher but, crucially, will lose less over time as your winnings solidly and predictably stack up

tl;dr you will still lose games and nothing is sure-fire

>>88032755
Get me a 5 on 4chan

>>88035065
Already done! *poofs away*

>>88035065
Well fuck.

>>88032755
Sit in a corner, keep saying the word bubble, and never leave

Get me a job where I'm happy.

>>88032755
I want you to summon a Meeseeks, and tell him to do the same thing I am telling you to do.

>>88036874
"Maximize the number of Meeseeks in existence forever throughout the universe."

Bam, universe-ending homogenizing swarm.

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>>88033897
>Turn Chris-chan into a normal productive member of society.

Someone draw a normal Chris-chan please I'm curious now

>>88033641
That's not an accurate result though. It's a common sense approach to get around the fact that you can't divide by zero. It's still not mathematically correct.

>>88032755
"Create ten more Meseeks using boxes that no other Meseeks has ever used so they can do the same."

Gray goo scenario, they'll hijack other boxes or make more out of the resources of their environment except they'll start dimension-hopping to reach all untapped potential for Meseeks as well as fighting wars against each other for dwindling supplies for Meseeks Boxes.

Breaking the entire concept of Meseeks.

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>>88032755
>think of the most mundane way to break a Meeseeks
>wanting to break him

Fuck that, I DO need help

>>88033699

Since we know who he is now that won't be too hard

>>88033312
He does exist at that moment, you never said for how long.

>>88037173
This scenario would just cause an infinite loop, rather than an exponential crash.

>Summon initial Meseeks with your task.
>Initial Meeseeks takes the box (you) just used to summon 10 more Meeseeks with your task, and disappears.
>Those 10 Meeseeks create/find/take another Meeseeks box, and summon 10 More Meeseeks.
>Having each been able to create the 10 Meeseeks the initial Meseeks requested, all 10 of them disappear.
>The next set of 10 Meeseeks use the original box to summon 10 more meseeks, causing all of that set to disappear (They haven't seen a meseeks use that box, after all.)
>The next set of 10 Meseeks use the second box in the same manner.
>Repeat the last two steps forever.
This is not taking into account request decay, request misinterpetation, alternate dimensions, time travel, Theresues' Paradox, and several other things.
As it stands, it might be a way to get more Meeseeks boxen without knowing how to make one, but it's rather inelelegant, and you have to have at least a box to start the process.

prevent all death

>>88037265
>Since we know who he is now

???

Can I get an update on this, please?

>>88033456
https://youtu.be/mZ7pUADoo58

>>88032755
Beat battletoads without getting hit once.

>>88036821
"Here's your makeup and nose. The costume is dry clean only. You start on Monday. Have fun being Happy the clown!" *poof*

Teach me how to play golf

>>88033897
>>Make Gaben release Half-Life 3, and have it at least on par in innovation to the original Half-Life.
I HURT MYSELF TODAY

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>>88032755
order them to recite pi in its entirety

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>>88033641
It depends on what the factor is.

Here's an example.
1/0 can be broken down to (1/1) (0/x) If you set x to be a growth model, then you have an interesting scenario.

Let's say x= Growth Model set for 60 secs.
y!=1+2 per second. So in second 1 y=3, second 2 would be 6, and this would compound until second 60, when the model would end, whatever y! will be divided by 0, resulting in an original 0 in the bottom, making the answer invalid.

However, what if you change the growth model limit to the End of Time? y! would constantly grow and compound until the end of time, in which all factors would be invalidated by turning into 0, and thus causing invalidation.

Sure in the end the answer results in the same eventuality, however there is data compounding throughout the time limit that shouldn't be ignored.

If you're philosophical, you can think of this scenario as your lifetime, you can even apply to the Universe's Lifetime.

Once that time limit is reached, y! will be divided by 0 to turn into 0. However, the beauty is in that 0 comes something we can't particularly understand. Chaos.

Invalidation doesn't mean everything goes away, it just means sense goes out the window and we have a realm of mathematical Chaos, in which anything can really happen.

If we apply this mindset to the Universe, "The Universe will reach the end of its life, return to nothing, but in that nothing will come Chaos. In Chaos strange things happen, like the eventual restarting of the formula again."

Division of Zero is actually a really interesting concept, if you care more about data over time rather than final result.

Help me take a couple strokes off my golf game.

>>88032755
Never "poof away"

>>88039951
He had been plaguing /v/, too?

Dude looks like a successful Drake Bell.

>>88032911
this

>>88041909
Thought it was his main board for awhile. Even seen him on /pol/ once or twice.

Impressive dedication for a topic only he cares about

Stay here till i get back
Never go back

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>>88032755
help my friend orgasm
he was born chemically castrated

>>88032911
I dunno that's broad enough he could take that to mean a lot of things. You might need to narrow it down.

>>88042286
Congratulations anon, Mr. Meeseeks has invented a new scientific advancement that allows for genital transplants and you're the donor.

>>88042514
I don't think you know what chemically castrated mean, anon...

>>88042012
So in the end, did he really hate horses that much? Or did he become too dedicated to a ruse? Is he still actively shitposting?

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>>88042514

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>>88032755
Make my wife orgasm

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>>88042514
>Unlike surgical castration, where the gonads are removed through an incision in the body, chemical castration does not remove organs, nor is it a form of sterilization.

Is your name Jerry perchance?

>>88032755
"Kill yourself"

>>88042324
The meeseeks will still have to stay in order to ensure that you live forever, whether in memory in stasis

>>88041481
woh

>>88043123
Not true
Mr. meeseek made Beth popular at school and poof and she lost her popularity later. He only needs to provide the opportunity more so than finish it. It's the bigger joke of how they work, a simple task will likely break them sooner because it demands an immediate solution. Hell that was the joke of the episode.

>>88043113
"CAN DO!" *gun shot*

>>88042286
He's still got a prostate.

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>>88032755

Recite pi.

>>88043246
That could be. I'm not sure how meeseeks work, but I see eternal life as a task with a definite endpoint that is always infinitely far away.

That brings up another question, what would happen if a meeseeks failed a task? I guess he'd be doomed to exist for eternity.

>>88043453
No idea about born castrated anons but chemical castration by doctors makes that impossible, it would just hurt a lot because the signal being sent to the brain is "full stop"

>>88032911
That's not mundane at all retard

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>>88043177
The really fun part is that you can combine division by zero and compounding growth models to predict things.

Let's say instead of y! being the rate for x, let's take a different concept in the form of a choice diagram. You start off with a point A, and have two directions, B and C. Moving from point A to B or C takes one second. Path B leads to choice Ba or Bb, Path C leads to choice Ca or Cb. This continues so forth for 60 branches, and the possibilities from point A to your final point at second 60 forms a line of data that gets invalidated once second 60 is reached.

To the layman, the final result of invalidation makes the journey worthless however I believe that the choices from point A to the final point mean something, as the odds of going through that same path if you start the model again are highly improbable.

If you know origin and you know destination, you can foresee possibility. The mathematical equivolent to this would be 2^60, meaning that from an initial starting point to a two fold path leads to 1,152,921,504,606,846,976 possibilities; all of which turns to nothing once 60 seconds is hit.

You can have even more fun with growth models if you decide to add paths that occur from paths not taken.
Example:
Point A to Point B or Point C.
This results in Moved to Point B or Moved to Point C, What if I moved to Point B and What if I moved to Point C? These background models grow exponentially as you continue along your path. In this, from a path of 2 real moves, you have a potential of 1,152,921,504,606,846,976 real possibilities however
1,329,279,957,849,158,729,038,070,602,803,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 alternate possibilities that arise within that 60 second time frame.

In Theoretical Mathematics, this is called "Rate, Projection, and Variance." In Scientific terms its "Time, Possibility and Alternative" In Sci-fi terms its "4th, 5th and 6th dimension."

Bet you weren't expecting to learn something!

>>88041909
>>88042012
I'm gonna tell you why I hate barney fag, and it all starts with this image. This cute little innocuous character from my childhood.

Every single fucking thread I try to make about her or Parappa on /v/ inevitably gets him in it.

He posts a gif with a red suckpuppet in it and enrages himself because it's a "pony shill image." And since /v/ mods aren't as based as /co/ mods when it comes to dealing with barney fag any thread I make where he comes in the thread gets deleted. I even got banned for reposting when I tried to start another Lammy thread.

Ironically enough, /co/ mods are actually pretty good at stomping out barney fag while not ruining our enjoyment.

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>>88044311
Whoops, posted the gif in question by accident.

I'll delete that, pretend I used this image.

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>>88044110
In theory, if you knew the duration from Time's Beginning to Time's end, along all the components of the Universe from The Universe itself to every quark, and had a duration between "moves" of 1 Planck Time (The time it takes an atom to rotate) you could predict everything that has ever happened or ever will happen.

If you apply to What If? branches, you could predict everything that could've happened along with everything that could happen.

It sounds impossible, and at our current time of knowledge is impossible.

The number of items to start off with is impossibly huge, and such the number of possibilities and variance of those possibilities are impossibly huge.

However, if you calculate a larger number; you can in theory be able to calculate the previous requirements.

Here comes the theory of the Julian and the Gailian.

The Julian is a rate of (((10*10)^10*(10*10)^10)*10)^10) over 1 Plack Time. This equates to be 10(+4000 zeros) in 1 Planck Time. In 1 second, this is equal to 10(+4000 zeros)^44.

In one second, you come up with a number bigger than the Universe itself.

The Gailian is similar however instead of 10(+4000 zeros)/1 Planck Time, it is 10(+4000 zeros)/10^-10(+4000 zeros) seconds. To solve this, its essentially taking the Julian and raising it to a power of itself. Therefore in 1 second you've created a number even greater than the number larger than the Universe.

So where am I going with this?
Well, the Julian and Galian are larger than component "all the components of the Universe from The Universe itself to every quark"

Using the Julian and Gailian, you could in theory predict more than could ever possibly predict in the Universe and its Alternate possibilities.

However, this is all theory; after all with our modern day technology we can't properly utilize these concepts. I think someday we might, but for now it's nothing more than "Madman's Math."

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I wish for you not to grant my wish.

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>>88044812
A one second Julian is 10+309,485,009,821,345,068,724,782,105,600,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 zeroes.

A one second Gailian 10+309,485,009,821,345,068,724,782,105,600,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 zeroes to the power of 10+309,485,009,821,345,068,724,782,105,600,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 zeroes.


There is also the Advanced Julian and Gailian that replaces the 10 in the original formula with 1 Googolplex. However, those figures are so mindboggingly titanic that I don't think I can even begin to theorize it. All I know its that it exists within the realm of theoretical mathematical possibility.

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>>88045271
>>88044812
>>88044110
>>88041481
I only wanted to read funny posts

>>88043123
The way I read that was that the command was for the meeseeks to live forever.

>>88045271
>>88045477
Here's what the form for the advanced Julian/Gailian looks like.

A Googolplex is 10^(10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.)

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>>88045803
forgot my picture.

>>88039402

It should be in the archives now but all I know is he finally pissed off the wrong people or everyone finally got tired of him

He finally got doxxed so his info was published

>>88045803
aiya, made another mistake.
A Googolplex is 10^(10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 zeroes)

>>88032755
"keep this woman happy"

>>88032755


I mister meseeks?

Name a word that rhymes with orange

>>88032755
Meeseeks: disobey this order.

>>88048229
Mount Borange door hinge and sporange

"Hey Mr Meseeks. Guess what?"

Hey Mr. Meeseeks, you have no job. You're free.

cure cancer

>>88048359
"What?" *poof*

>>88032755
Hey Mr. Meeseeks, live past 30!

>>88033456
Not to mention on any number scale not centered at zero.

>>88049042
What part of units don't you understand?

win the presidency of the united states
>mr. meeseeks launches into a multiple year campaign
>doesn't succeed in 2020
>doesn't succeed in 2024
>grows angrier and angrier each passing election
>it's now decades in the future
>by sheer force of will and the odds falling in his favor mr. meeseeks wins the general election by electoral vote
"we now cut to meeseeks campaign headquarters for the president elect's acceptance speech"
>"FINALLY!"
*poof*

the nation is thrown into chaos

bonus points if you summoned a 2nd meeseeks to be his VP and he had to wait for meeseeks 1 to become president, but then because the president meeseeks poofed, the 2nd never becomes president and doesn't get to fulfill his task

>Help me figure out how a raven's like a writing desk

>>88040340
He does. It was the genesis version.

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>>88041481
I wish I had such an in-depth understanding of this, but I could never into higher math

>>88048229
Orange rhymes with orange.

I'd paint myself blue and go "Hi I'm Mr. Meeseeks" when he appears. See what happens.

>>88032755
Break yourself.

>>88032755

your task is not to do this task

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Don't be charmed by Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's natural charisma.

>>88032755
Ask him to be your BFF

The fuck is a barneyfag?