So Homestuck's snapchat thing had an update where some actual

I don't give a shit about tumblr but does that mailmummy person have a new account? I love the art.

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>>87648913
Doesn't look like it. A lot of artists just dropped off the face of the earth when Homestuck took a nosedive in quality.

I mean it was like 11 lines of dialogue with weird lesbian pandering

Troll rebels capturing Jane shouldn't matter because she's a God.

Also Cohen's doing this plotline? I thought he was going to be confined to the game

>>87649177
He did both this and the halloween update.
Also Jane apparently is only a god as far as "hurr being able to fly", remember Cohen and Hussie have basically forgotten most aspects of the story.

>>87649177
You and I both know they aren't professional enough to give anyone any specific project roles.

>>87649268
>Cohen's actual title in the company is "Guy who do thing"

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remember when MSPA was good?

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>>87649177
>>87649210
Maybe the robes are what gives them powers because you know what they say

The clothes make the man.

>>87649385
Its all I want to remember, fucking homestuck

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>>87649385
Remember when hussie hadn't lost his mind.

>>87648937
>that one time Roxy couldn't pay for the dinner
>Calliope innocently watching Roxy get filled up with multiple troll dicks

>>87649559
Hopefully someone in WP remembers in time that calliope doesn't romance

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Unf

>>87649796
only good thing to come out of these updates

>>87648879
>troll rebels
Proof?

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>>87650018
see >>87648937

>>87648879
Why are you people still reading this?
Can't you not just things go? What pleasures you get from this?

>>87649796
>Le wacky you've been haxxored face
Christ at least have a decent excuse like some figure in the background fucking with things instead of a blunt fucking sign spelling out the plot fucking stupid goddamn kike fuck

>>87650065
Why do people read buckly or dumbing of age or other shitty webcomic
Fuckoff Cunt were on topic

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>>87650065
Anger and false hope

>>87650047
When people said Jade should do stuff with non-Daves, that didn't mean go full rape.

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>>87650249
It's all or nothing man.

>>87650065
i think i mostly want to see what happens when hussie's life breaks apart

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>>87650315
>Andrew what did I tell you about slacking off during the day?
>I gave you this janitorial position out of friendship and charity, don't make me regret it

>>87650221
>>87650267
STOP FUCKING POSTING THIS SHIT EVERY FUCKING THREAD

>>87650344
he even lets him sleep on the couch in the break room after hours, what a generous man

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>>87650366
No.

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when will john kill himself?

>>87650277
Jade's well-toned muscular arm

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>>87650503

>>87650501
When Cohen uses his sword to make John and caliborn fall in love instead of making the masterpiece occur

>>87650526
>dreamworks face

Space players are bad

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I rarely even view these threads, let alone join in on them, so I'm not sure if this is news, but he just posted this today.

>>87650873
You take that back

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>>87650889
I should be mad but I'm not and I dont know why

>>87650937
It's because he didn't suffer like the rest of us.

>>87650873
2/3 of them are the best wife material

>>87650954
I only started and finished it a little under a year ago, so my opinion isnt worth much

>>87650937
Because this is ACTUALLY a joke.

>>87651008
What joke

>>87650985
Dave and Rose have evidently similar tastes.

>>87650889
Is this ""humour"" or what? I'd would once have assumed it was but given the circumstances.

>>87650889
That's alright Cohen, one of these days I'll get around to buying Hiveswap

>>87651098
assume everything cohen says is dead serious because he is incapable of writing jokes

>>87651064
Wifeswap when

>>87651064
It runs in the fanily to want a space player to breed you

>>87651173
I'm sure they pass by each sometimes, see their pregnant wives and just nod respectfully to one another, because they're living the dream.

>>87651173
You breed space players, not the opposite.

>>87651221
But the space players all have dicks.
Jades dog dick
Kanayas giant tentabulge
And callies au long snake

>>87651278
We've been over this before, Jade's got a puffy puppy pussy.

>>87651278
Fuck off memester.

>>87651295
Was it always puffy?

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Cohen believes that the sun revolves around the Earth.

>>87651364
Only when orcs are near.

>>87651372
So Cohen is trying to justify pedophilia, fucking typical.

>>87651372
Wait, but the reason the sun is big and red is because it got so old. It expanded but Earth's orbit isn't going to expand is it? That's not how it works.

>>87651372
>Hussie made a point to get stupid science stuff somewhat correct
>Cohen is all the way back in the 1400s

Why is jane gay now? Did john bringing vriska back to life make jane gay

>>87651008
>>87651098

I don't think Cohen knows what a joke is, honestly.

Plus he's (apparently) said that he hasn't before, when he was first brought into WP.

>>87651415
It's mass, not volume that determines the radius of a planet's orbit. I'm no expert but I don't think stars get much more massive as they age, barring some unusual astronomical event. They expand but get less dense. So even though Earth's sun gets bigger around, the orbit shouldn't change.

Of course, the speed at which the Earth revolves around the sun is also part of the orbit, so it might be that Earth slowed down or something?

>>87651278
do not HSG here

>>87650889
>>87651481
>>87651154
It's obviously a joke. He say stuff like this preciselly because he know it piss off the haters.

wait so caliborn is 16 years old

>>87651372
This is kind of fucking pathetic.
>size of sun affecting the orbit of satellites
Fucking wew lad

>>87651599
>the haters.
I never liked that term when it was in vogue and I like it even less now.

>>87651599
If that's true than consider this an apology.

Doesn't excuse his writing skills and apparent comprehension of science being utter shit though.

>>87651566
If the orbit slowed down without a corresponding loss of mass it would slowly fall into the sun. An orbit is only stable because you're going sideways fast enough to outpace falling towards whatever it is you're orbiting.

It's bullshit.

>>87651645
>then*
,':^)

He just wants Calliope to be the same age as Roxy. Considering how loose the actual canon is on that it'd make more sense to ignore Hussie off-handedly mentioning that the cherubs are 11 orbits around the dying sun old, since that's DOTA Twitter material, and declare them 16+.

>>87651665
well yeah there has to be some kind of event to push the earth outside of its orbit regardless

maybe when Jade brought it back she put it a little too far away from the sun, though that would suggest some pretty cold winters on New Earth

>>87651692
Oops.
What can I say? Mobile is trash.

>>87651721
but they don't act 16, both cherubs act decidedly younger

>>87651721
Except they were both explicitly childish. Roxy fucked off John to a life of depression to molest a 12 year old skeleton.
I fucking HATE this.

>>87651722
wait I just realized, it's not even the same sun
so maybe New Earth had a hotter, more massive sun from the beginning

>>87651762
That... is actually a very good point. It could have had a longer stable orbit. Ok, maybe it's not bullshit.

>>87651787
I don't think cohen understands that but at least we were able to solve it

>>87651748
Nah, 16 year olds are pretty immature in general. It's comparing them to the overly mature Homestuck 16 year olds that sets off the scales.

>I-it was just a joke guys see I'm clearly being ironic now so obviously my tweet about queerness has to be ironic too!
This does not alleviate my concerns.

Does Roxy being a lesbian pedophile mean Mom molested Rose?

>>87651854
would explain why rose convinced her lesbian lover to dress up as her mother for halloween

seriously can you imagine asking your girlfriend to dress up as her mom
what if she asked you to dress up like your dad

>>87651787
>>87651762
Except that red giants are cooler which would mean it would be closer and thus she is YOUNGER.
Cohen can't even bullshit properly.

>>87651933
cherubs can survive in the vacuum of space though so I don't think temperature is a problem for them

>>87651933
Why did he hire this guy

I'll be honest, there's probably better avenues for criticism than his understanding of red giants

>>87649458
That was never the case

>>87651818
I'm not even that one reddit tier apologist who keeps defending Cohen and his own shitty opinions and theories, but you are being silly.

>>87651970
But other species do not. Cloun seemed fine there. Not sweating or shivering. Further, trolls seem to preference the same general temperature as humans as evidenced by their easy cohabitation.
QED the planet was in typical 'earth' conditions which, with a red giant would mean being significantly closer and thereby diminishing the time distance the planet would be required to move.

https://twitter.com/skullmandible/status/797570617058824192

how the fuck is cali 16/20?

>>87651933
>calliope is actually like 6
>john wasn't abandoned, he left after realizing how awful all his friends are

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>>87651372
I don't have the "She's twenty-eight!" Hal Jordon picture.
Is Cohen trying to tell us that Calliope isn't under-age? Just look at her cheeks, man, she still has the prepubescent spirals. Even if she's experienced more time, she has the body of an eleven-year-old.

>>87652138
>https://twitter.com/skullmandible/status/797570617058824192
>shelby defending him
>these two fucks run Homestuck now

Fucking WHY

>>87652138
She can't age. I want hack Hussie back. At least he was sort of internally consistent even if he was narratively inconsistent.

>>87651933
Lower surface temperature because of the larger volume stretching it thinner, but the overall luminosity is greatly increased so it'd be hotter than main sequence.

It's commonly suggested that when the sun expands into its giant phase it would boil away the atmosphere and oceans.

>>87652170
yep see
>>87652138
she is the same age as everyone else

>>87652138
Great, now do stupid shit to try and gloss over the fact that cherubs can't feel romantic love.

>>87652180
i think andrew actually checks his shit when he's not 100% sure
cohen just thinks with various internal organs that aren't his brain

>>87652082
cloun was also riddled with bullet holes and got back up again
several times

calliopes age feels like a retcon, like an actual one not one of those john ones

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Wow I sure do feel invested in this extraneous story about some troll society that is being rebelled against for whatever reason like are trolls somehow racist against humans despite having them as gods or whatever I don't

What happened to John being angry at Caliborn, wasn't that a thing? That just came up?

Can Jade do any tricks or is she like one of those shitty small dogs that is never trained by their fat middle aged woman of an owner?

>>87652138
Remember when Caliborn said a teen came and beat him up, clearly illustrating he was younger than a teen? Fuck you, no you don't.

>>87652215
>i think andrew actually checks his shit when he's not 100% sure
I don't think so, especially if we accept that he wrote the post-retcon stuff, which has a lot of plotholes. I think Hussie was just very good at keeping everything in his head because he was constantly making Homestuck, but once the consecutive extended hiatuses started hitting, he started to fuck up.

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>>87652204
So she's an adult in the body of a child? Just like one of my Korean picture-shows!

>>87652192
You assuming expansion rather than nature see:>>87651762
Also we have new problems now. Ghost stasis aging.

>>87652268
>he started to fuck up.
Understatement.

>>87652224
It pretty much is. Her AGING on the other hand is another level worse.

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so when will cohen make john gay so he doesn't have to be lonely anymore

>>87652300
He should just do it, prove that Cohen cares more about his agenda than the comic.

>>87652300
Cohen's ending will be John redeeming Caliborn with the power of love

>>87652259
If you say sit! really loudly she'll sit down and get all wide eyed and submissive.

>>87652175
You guys have twitter. Don't take this. Reveal it for the joke it is. Make them back down on Roxy Calli for fear of seeming like the disgusting trash they are. Roxy doesn't deserve a happy ending. Friend abandoners get no sympathy.

>>87648879
Just die already!

instead of using bad physics to find reasons for calliope and roxy to ethically have sex, why not just say that calliope spent seven years as a ghost

>>87652358
>Friend abandoners get no sympathy.
all her friends are dead and she has a kingdom to run, she doesn't have time to baby john if all he wants to do is mope at home

>>87652419
because then her body is still 11.

>>87652430
and vriska is still 13 but that didn't stop meenah
the damage is done

>>87652441
that was creepy as hell too

>>87652404
The threads or the comic?

>>87652138
its funny how whenever people start defending cohen the dude speaks up to make everyone weirded out again

also whats the point of aging calliope up again

>>87652300
Just have John fuck one of his many many female descendants.

>>87652474
Gay sex, duh. Liberals haven't managed to get people to accept pedophilia just yet, so Calliope has to be Roxy's age to be dating her

>>87652474
>also whats the point of aging calliope up again
so when roxy and jane dp her it's not creepy

>>87652441
Aren't young cherubs canonically prepub. Calli hasn't progressed to a sexually active state.

>>87652497
>>87652500
So he really is making the writing suffer for queerness. What a fag.

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>>87652404
> just die already!
> to the one who can resurrect other players and herself

>>87652508
shhhhh shhhh shhhhussh

>>87652508
And it wouldn't matter anyway because Cherubs can only feel hate, not romance. But I'm sure there will be some stupid new-age "Oh aliens can feel this thing because reasons despite what was said in the comic!" bullshit.

>>87652526
only once. and she already revived herself

>>87652508
she's not even supposed to be capable of love-based attraction
this guy will not hesitate to break even the most established canon if it means he can pander to progressives
he's a bad author

>>87652540
>But I'm sure there will be some stupid new-age "Oh aliens can feel this thing because reasons despite what was said in the comic!" bullshit.
we already got that with John/terezi

>>87652520
That is literally all that could have been done. He's just doubling down on it MORE now.
Asking bent people not to bend the shit out of a story is like talking to an echo

>>87652571
Which never really happened

>>87652581
it would have if terezi didn't leave

>>87652540
If cherubs can feel love and humans other quadrants, then they have to say that leprechauns can be not-gay

>>87652540
>>87652558
Her 'learning' to love is irrelevant. Until he makes her a sky-dragon you can just acusse Roxy of being ped, quite handily.

Please do, by the way, I hate this hack and his bullshit. Like why would roxy need to make a bandanna? She is a GOD of the VOID who MAKES SHIT.

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>>87652546
I've been thinking bout that. She rezzed her dreamself. Lost her waking self. Godtier is supposed to be an extra life again. usually you don't need to rezz players at godtier because they exit the story when it's dramatically appropriate (a heroic end or a justified end). She can probably still give a 1UP to her friends.

http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=007381

"Yes. Your personality is stuck in some sort of cantankerous prepubescent limbo. You are going to be a stunted, miserable tool forever."

Proof that Calliope was the equivalent of 13 at the start of her session, making her only 17 now.

Roxy and Jane groomed a child for sex.

>>87652540
if cherubs could only feel hate, calliope never would have been nice to the alpha kids in the first place
ergo, 'cherubs can only feel hate' is a lie

>>87652629
That's not how it works. You can only develop negatively. You can't cure faggotry, only contract it just like love and quadrants.

>>87652658
romantic hate, not normal hate.

>>87652634
>She can probably still give a 1UP to her friends.
everyone except rose, kanaya, joke, and jane herself can all be revived

>>87652636
More:
http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=006931

uu: I KNOW. I AM A CHILD.
uu: SO ARE YOu. IT JuST SO HAPPENS THAT YOu ARE A CHILD.

>>87652634
>>87652673
oh and dirk forgot bout him

>>87652636
>making her only 17 now.
She cannot grow. She is dead.

>>87652636
is 13 prepubescent? Most of the 13 year old girls in homestuck already have tits

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>>87652631
She makes shit by stealing (for the sake of others) their non-existence, Her mask still exists, she didn't bring it with her to dinner, so she can't steal it from not-existing.

If it makes you feel any better, I'm sure she stole the green sash from someone else at the restaurant, stolen for the sake of rescuing her friend.

>>87652658
When we're talking hate and love, we're talking in the romantic sense. Kismesis versus matesprits and all that.

>>87652706
>I'm sure she stole the green sash from someone else at the restaurant, stolen for the sake of rescuing her friend.
it was the tie she wore with the suit for her date

>>87652695
no? the ring brings you back to life, nowhere was it said you can't age with it

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>>87652693
True; Dirk did make a heroic sacrifice, not just to put down Union Jack but also so Dave can get over his living-in-Bros-shadow quasi-daddy issues.

>>87652739
her necktie? wow, I must've overlooked that, since I wear neckties and none of them would work as a belt nevermind a facemask.

>>87652346
>people draw jade muscular and in charge instead of the submissive little doggirl she actually is in canon

>>87652784
I have a few that do, and Roxy probably doesn't have that fat of a head so the tie can fit around easier

>>87652634
Oh fuck, I didn't realize that. How the hell did that work? Does each version of her have their own resurrection count?

>>87652706
>(for the sake of others)
Fuck off. Classpect memes can get out. What's next; John turns into wind (for the sake of freedom)? Spare me.
She can steal the non-existance of a second mask. It was a hachet job and you fucking know it Cohen.

>>87652739
She is still clearly a child given that Cherubs have that weird 'deveopment' process. If she is alive is either in stasis or confined to be guevenile due to her inadequacies.

>>87652706
roxy can create duplicates of things that already exist, which is why she was able to make so many perfectly generic objects

>>87652792
She punched Dirk in the face.

aren't god tier costumes kept in a portable dimension anyway
I thought Vriska was able to shift between her god tier pajamas and her civilian clothes at will

>>87652912
So?

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>>87652877
classpect memes? what?
Dude, it's in the fucking comic. Not everything you disagree with is memeshit.
> UU: a rogUe is a passive class. ... passive classes allow their aspect to benefit others.

>>87652944
only when she was a ghost I think? like she did change into her pajama's for the tavros stuff up will she died but she was alone for hours before that

>>87652944
COHEN
O
H
E
N

>>87653037
It is a meme though. Literally all classes in the comic have benefitted others. So too have they served to benefit the user. It's just lore fluff, and nice as it is, has no place in discussion of how her powers work. If anything it is a note on her narrative role not that it helped her benefit John through the depression of losing everything he ever knew.

>>87653086
>Literally all classes in the comic have benefitted others
except prince, bard, thief, etc.

>>87653027
Submissives don't punch people in the face

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>>87652739
> can't age
What little we know about Cherub biology, they are born with two selves, that alternate inhabiting the Cherub's body. We saw the cherub's face and tongue change colour depending on which self is currently in-use. At puberty, one of the selves dominates the other, and the other never resumes inhabiting the body, and the face-marking change to a new pattern.

So Calliope did not dominate her brother, and her face has not changed. Maybe she's an adult, but you can't deny that her body appears to be prepubescent. It'd be like dating a woman who is still small, androgynous and without any secondary sex characteristics -- you wouldn't get arrested but you'd get a lot of weird looks and people would ask to see your date's drivers license.

>>87653101
Really? Name examples?
Bard helped some to the point of babby sitting.
Theif? Well as I recall one orchestrated the victory over LE and managed to save everyone from a game over (stupid as it was)

In short you're wrong. In long you're a veeeeeeeeerrrrryyyyy wwwwrrrrroooonnnnngg

>>87653068
she's got wings though, they aren't removable
she has to undergo a transformation of some sort to get godded up

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>>87653086
> It is a meme though

>>87652944
They're captchaloged. Remember those?

>>87653183
I can't believe hussie changed his mind on that. It's like after vriskagram he just gave up even trying anymore. Plot points would be unfulfilled, ships would change randomly for no reason, the themes of the story changed wildly to justify the collapse of the story, and then john kills himself at the end, likely never meeting his older half-brother and half-sister

>>87653198
It's not though. Secondary characteristics are just that. Calli IS just that young. She has been just that young and continues to be just that young, physically and mentally.

>>87653242
see >>87653228

>There are people that actually read Cohen's garbage
Literally Paradox Space 2.0.

>>87653198
Isn't it implied they don't mature mentally if they don't predominate? That's why caliborn is so stunted

>>87653242
John/Roxy was like a classic Hussie gag. "Dave, dude, I'm LITERALLY banging your mom."

But now that's not happening. We need "queerness".

>>87653273
hey now
actual effort went into paradox space

>>87653198
So Calliope is the reverse-Arisia? Instead of a 14-year-old in an adult body, she's an adult in a child's body? At least she's dating someone better than Hal Jordon.

>reminder that Nektan and Mierfa were hatched on alternia but will die in universe C
>Reminder that Joey and Jude could still end up there as well
>reminder they could even end up meeting John, Jade, Roxy and Jake and having a tearful reunion with their siblings and father

>>87653284
Say it with me: Progressive values are more important than making a good comic.

>>87653198
She'll grow up eventually. The real question is about her cheeks. They never ended up filling in like they were supposed to. What happens when she falls asleep, or when someone says "caliborn" in front of her (god, what was the point of that plot point)?

>>87653242
>They're captchaloged. Remember those
I will admit I didn't for a moment. What the fuck happened to this comic?

things we are ignoring so that roxy and calliope can ethically eat each other out:
- basic astrophysics
- cherub lore
- references to caliborn's age from the author himself

>>87653294
That reminds me, where are the senator John pics. We need new content.

>>87653294
>another 'reunion' of people who don't actually know each other but are genetically related
oh, boy

>>87653366
Basic decency laws
Roxy's prior inclinations

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>>87653366
It's Roxy, Calliope, AND Jane, shitlord.

>>87653433
>>87653366
Canon, lore, characterisation

Cohen is to Hussie what ESO is to TES

>>87653436
Fucking WEW lad. I hate it even more now. Given that Jade is only with Dave to peg Karkat's boi pucc there isn't even a SINGLE straight human female and John is the only straight human make (and as such alone and miserable like the cishet shitters deserve amirite)

>>87653436
Cohen realizes that Shelby won't fuck him right

>>87653411
to be fair, Roxy would at the very least be the same sister they remembered. John wouldn't know shit about them, but Jade might have known a little about them from her grandpa. Jake on the other hand is the real question, because it's entirely possible grandma english had kids of her own. Personally though I don't like the idea of that. I'm more hoping that B2!Dave and B2!Rose each had a kid of their own.

If that worked out, it might also mean that we have 4 kids left over to fill the Bard/Sylph/Mage/Thief of Doom/Blood/Rage/Mind slots

>>87653366
the astrophysics and cherub lore can be put aside, but callie is 100% a green reptilain loli, which means that now the list of canon pedos includes

>Roxy
>Meenah
>Cronus (with added incest)
>Hussie himself
>maybe Doc Scratch

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>Yesterday some Plebbit apolgist insists that Roxy isn't gay now
>Today Cohen confirms it over twitter that Roxy is gay
>Also goes out of his way to state Calliope is of legal age

Maybe /pol/ was right.

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Fucking hell, where did Hussie go? Is Cohen in charge of Homestuck now? God damn it, I signed on for works by Andrew Hussie. I can take his absurd writing, because at least I know it's his. But this is like going to one of Gordon Ramsay's restaurants, and not only getting terrible food, but finding out the chef was just some guy from McDonald's.

>>87653630
This is basically what happened.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FHnyQXyuTGY

>>87653630
And then you're called a racist for wanting an actual chef, and that you should maybe wait and see what the mcdonalds guy cooks up even though the appetizer was a burnt piece of bread with some ketchup

>>87653595
>maybe
It's literally underaged gay shit bruv. The sprawling adventure settles down to talk about how some twenty something and her lesbain mate fuck an eternal child skeleton.
This is what it's about RIGHT NOW.

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Okay, so assuming there are going to be a Strider and a Lalonde in hiveswap, what do you think their classpects will be?

Right now Jude kind of gives me a Mage of Rage vibe. He's clearly delusional, but comes off knowledgable and autistic as well. It's also possible he's a doom player but it's hard to say.

Joey is probably a sylph since she doesn't strike me as a thief or mage, but the question is what her aspect is

>>87653436
Is he fucking serious?

It's a three-way lesbian relationship?

>>87653679
>racist
I fear my response but who is Cohen and that other twatter. They aren't black angel-kin transwomen or something are they?

>>87653712
So progressive! lol! Isn't it fucking HILARIOUS

>>87653703
I'd hate to break it to you, but Sburb isn't in Hiveswap.

>>87653729
no cohen is a woke white boy

>>87653753
Even worse to be of h

>>87653703
I don't get it why is it pointing at oregon

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>>87653703
Jude and Joey aren't players of Sburb. They don't get classes nor aspects.

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>>87653712
hahaha what u taking me seriously bro look i just made a tweet where i said i DIDNT read homestuck so good look making out what's real and fake

>>87653729
Cohen is a fat Jewish New Yorker whose only accomplishment prior to stumbling into the position of creative director for Hiveswap, and what seemingly is now Homestuck is a whole, was writing "funny" tweets that Donald Trump could have farted out in-between rallies.

>>87653750
>>87653774
I know, but four characters is all that's needed to fill the classpect gaps

>>87653770
It's gravity falls

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What the fuck does a Prince of Void do?

Can he destroy the space like English destroyed dream bubbles?

>>87653839
it's the exact same power set as rogue of void
classpects are dumb

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>>87653595
>Maybe /pol/ was right.
Sometimes I wonder if hst/hsg is /pol/'s colony on /co/

what other group so consistently rails against political correctness and social justice?

>>87653871

no doubt, I'm kinda drunk and I was playing around with combinations to see if I create something uber.

>>87653888

now that Trump has won /pol/ will be leaking everywhere.

>>87652180
>she cant age
wait why cant she

>>87653888
It's a microcosm for the election ironically enough

>Smug Metropolitan Liberal ignores the core fanbase/working class
>Scapegoats all the problems with the comic/economy on racism and homophobia
>Gets memed to death by "red-pilled" core fanbase/working class
We're a monster of Hussie's own creation

The fact that he hired a jewish guy named (((Cohen))) is just icing on the irony shit cake

>>87653888
Literally every other thread that isn't /sug/ you whingy piece of shit. In case you haven't noticed preachy nonesense isn't particularly fun to live with. Worse still when it was active agenda pushers.

>>87653888
I don't think the people here actually subscribe to the /pol/ dogma
I think the people here are generally progressive actually, but self-declared progressives keep making homestuck more and more shitty and so we like them a little less every day

>>87653781
I still can't believe this shit, it's like day and night

>>87653839
Think iike an author, not like an accountant.
What do you need the Prince of Void character to do? Maybe it could be someone who destroys what is hidden or conspicuously absent.
"We have no weapons of mass destruction!"
"Well, not anymore."

>>87653940
She died rather than going through puberty. As a single entity she is unable to develop past her current state.
>inb4 mental age
Sorry but that is based on a lot of physical factors. She doesn't age.

>>87653940

Something about her being the maid of life probably

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>>87653972
No refunds Anon

>>87653839
Princes don't just destroy, they also splinter things, dividing them. A prince of void can divide by zero

>as a queer person of Jewish heritage,
He decided he was bisexual a few weeks ago
This is total bullshit

>>87653951
>implying I'm whining

It's just something I've noticed

>>87653994
I feel like a Bernie supporter.

>>87653595
>>Also goes out of his way to state Calliope is of legal age
Cherubs don't mature unless they predominate over their sibling.

>>87653770
Reference to Gravity Falls, I believe.

>>87653436
So this is gonna sound stupid as shit, but I'm honestly curious, please bare with me.

Why aren't Tumblr/Reddit/Twitters bisexual, acesexual, whateverthefuckelsesexual getting mad that everyone is gay now? They're on my feeds enough that I know they would be there.

They always throw a fit when they're left out, which is sometimes understandable, so why is suddenly making a big lesbians-only orgy not causing a fuss?

Again I know this is a shitty thing to even bring up but I wanna know why they're not pissed. Would Cohen and Shelby just label them "haters and trolls" or "straight passing" or whatever stupid shit they call them now?

Know what'd be a neat plotline? People who know about Sburb, and try to somehow trick it into giving them a class and aspect without actually playing the game and ending the world.

Sburb was so so much more interesting as some kind of cosmic shithead game instead of what we got.

I mean this kind of just settles the question, right?

Ignore Cohen's tweets and reddit comments - Calliope has been retconned to being Roxy's age for homo pandering.

I don't get WHY exactly, I mean, Calliope's an alien, I'm sure there's some aliens you can fuck as twelve year olds. Like we don't bat an eye at two year old dogs fucking - well it's just another sign of the cancerous writing the guy is gonna bring.

Everything is contemporary. Pandering is better than world building.

>TFW homestuck ended almost a year ago and the homestuck replacement I've been working on since is only JUST getting it's first short story
>TFW i'll probably abandon it again, just like I always do

>>87654053
The LGBT community is self-hating and cannibalizing after years of ostracization and having little way to connect and unify that wasn't petty rich gay assholes going out for cocktails.

Most people in the community hate and shittalk each other endlessly to the point of self-destruction.

you aren't even pretending to care about the story anymore

you all just are bitching about garbage ships for garbage characters

these threads hit a new low

>>87653959
>generally progressive
I am inherently anti progresivism. I think it's abhorrent to incenstivise new for the sake of new. Adapt and maintain, those are what good things do. If adaption means going back to old principles or forging new ones, it doesn't matter as long as it's adaptive. This, new and boundary pushing is the only direction. Not in response to something but as a state of being is horrible.
From this mindset there is no such thing as a slippery slope falacy, it's a slippery slope inevitability. It's intellectually bankrupt apealling to the lowest, least stable emotional people.
You are not in good company. I'd almost say commies were smarter than you.

>>87654095
>you aren't even pretending to care about the story anymore
Why should we if Hussie doesn't?

>>87654053
Because it's gay and that's all they care about. They don't care about equality, they're just fujoshits dressing up their fetish crap as trying to be morally superior

>>87654065
wait excuse me fucking what

Calliope is a 10 year old skelly girl how is she suddenly 20

>>87654095
>you all just are bitching about garbage ships for garbage characters

Sounds like Cohen.

>>87653979

This seems cool. He might be one hell of a wildcard, isn't?

I mean, I'm trying to think outside of the box here, could he be someone that might end up literally destroying things with nothing or destroying nothing at all.

You could also probably play with words here. Your example is amazing.

>>87654015

Destroying the whole universe after doing it probably

>>87654063
I want a spin-off about Pro SBURB Gamers who play consecutive games of SBURB and keep stacking classpect powers

or people who do challenge runs, like playing the game solo or speedrunning, or doing a completionist run that does all of the sidequests

>>87653284
>we never got motherlovers
Literally the worst part of the end

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>Always wanted Calliope and Roxy to be gay together
>This snapchat arc happens

>>87654053
Because they feel threatened. When people are threatened they are most unified. When they are unified they fall into a hierachy for existential reasons. Gay men>Gay women>Trans>other loony shit
Lesbians was the next on the list given Dirk and Jake.

nuHussie must really fucking hate the "I am not a homosexual" line. It basically means he doesn't have a clue what to do with John.

>>87654128
That wouldn't make sense. I mean we already know what happens to a solo session, you get No Future mode and blown to fucking smithereens if you can't somehow turn your entire fucking planet into a Land.

It would be cool if some players try to play again and see what happens, or from greed for more power, but we already know Hussie would go "lol uh uhhhhh... uhhhhhhhhh oh nope can't Skaia kills them this is very interesting oh thank GOD I don't have to write anything creative"

>>87654161
I want a fanfic where Old Hussie and New Hussie fight each other.

>>87654161
Make him trans, obviously.

Remember when we feared Toby Fox would make Hiveswap too gay and simplistic what the FUCK were we thinking

>>87654170
yeah well fuck caliborn's special snowflake session
that shit was so dumb, it would have been way better if caliborn actually played the game solo and found a loophole instead of being handed galactic power on a silver platter

>>87654095
What fucking story? John is depressed. Roxy is a traitor and not only is she a pedo but she is a slut roping Jane in too.

All the story is now is stupid character drama. THAT'S ALL IT IS ANY MORE.

>>87654183
It'd be like Vriska mocking the shit out of (Vriska), but actually satisfying!

>>87654115
Retcons to make it less creepy that roxy is rattling them bones

>>87654192
If Toby did more for Hiveswap than writing music it might actually have been successful.

>>87654153
I remember you and despise you.

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>>87654196
Caliborn's session and idea was actually fine and neat, but where you're right is that the *execution* of the concept was so boring despite something incredibly fantastical. We never felt Caliborn work for it, never saw him working for it outside of a flash or two, and he did everything with barely any mention of HOW he did it.

If Hussie had actually planned and written instead of masturbating and screaming when everyone pointed at his shit eggplant dick, he could have had an AMAZING plot where Caliborn was seen from the very start, advancing and fighting in parallel on the Land Earth while we flash to the kids, allowing them to finally tie together and you go "HOLY FUCK IT WAS EARTH ALL ALONG and oh shit they gotta fight him now ohhhhh shiiiiit"

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>>87654235
Too fucking late for that! Canon. Roxy is (somehow) fucking a 10 year old skeleton girl. Roxy is a mega pedo lez with a thing for chicks who can't even get off unless it's hate.

so does caliborn still do his session in this timeline? how does this work?

I'd actually kind of find it funny of all this was taking place before his Masterpiece

>>87654335
I used to like Roxy. What the fuck happened to this trash?

>>87654095
I could give you a shit ton of reasons why I'm bitching, but not without bogging down the thread and sounding like an emotional 16 year old.

I used to care a lot about this story and knowing some fucking hack had it fall into his lap because the creator stopped caring, and is turning it into the most embarrassing, pandering shit just so he can give himself a pat on the back at night is sort of infuriating.

>>87654339
I think the implication is that Caliborn's timeline was ALWAYS the retcon timeline, and he was never actually stopped or escaped, and nothing was changed. John did exactly as time demanded it had to be done, birthing Caliborn.

>>87654339
caliborn does his session in the "true" timeline, yeah
the retcons were always predestined to happen because lord english can't exist without john doing a retcon

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>Homer's Odyssey was swell,
>A bunch of guys that went through hell,

>He told the tale but didn't tell,
>the audience why.

>He didn't say, "Here's what it means"
>And "Here's a few deleted scenes"

>"Charybdis tested well with teens"


>He's not the story...

>>87654352
>Cohen's writing is his only weapon
I don't get why he's punishing us to get to Trump. That doesn't make any sense!

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>>87654371
Which makes you ask why the fuck it was John and Vriska, and not, I dunno, Dave and Aradia? Time players doing this since it's yet another boring useless doom loop that goes nowhere?

>>87654263
>assuming it to be the same person
More than one person likes the ship. It's actually fairly popular outside of HSG, albeit not the favorite of most. It's one of those "oh yeah, they're pretty cute" ships for people not invested in other Roxy pairings.

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>>87654386
GOOFY COHEN EDENFIELD THINKS HE CAN MAKE UP FOR THE FAILURE CALLED ACT 6 BY MAKING EVERYONE GAY - SAD!

>>87654404
a) there's only two of you here
>b) talking about HS anywhere else
>having a tumblr

>>87654380
An endeavor I have for every story. You let the message speak through actions, not stilted dialogue and buzzwords. You show humans being human, and let the story and its actors have their own voice, never yours. Probably why I love horror so much.

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>>87654087
Abandon it, anon. Let me take up the reins instead.
Never give up

>>87654445
Yeah Paranatural was ruined by Zack telling half the story through tweets.

You do need to market sometimes though. But what Edenfield is doing isn't marketing, it's just pettily using a kickstarter project for his own purposes

>>87654444
There's me, someone else I know, and that distinct anon who I can confirm isn't either of us.

I warned you all that Icels would corrupt Cohen just as she corrupted Trash but you didn't listen. I told you!

>>87654153
>posting traitors
Of course you would ship cali/roxy. How do you feel about jane being with them

>>87654480
>Yeah Paranatural was ruined by Zack telling half the story through tweets.
And the art getting shit
and the writing getting shit
And the colouring getting shit
and the pandering
And the pacing
and the lack of a buffer
And him talking shit at the fanbase

[Z/H] is a perfect example of what not to do

>Trump is going to be President
>His tweets are funnier than anything Twitter funnyman ever wrote
No wonder Cohen is so salty.

>>87654366
>I think the implication is that Caliborn's timeline was ALWAYS the retcon timeline
But what about erisol?

>>87654480
While I'd love to tell an entire story through parts and pieces hidden across media leading into some ultimate end, I feel like that shit should stay in movies and games and stuff. It doesn't work for books and single comics.

>>87654534
>His tweets are funnier than anything Twitter funnyman ever wrote
I dont find the insane rantings of a retard funny

>>87654542
What about him

If you mean there was some weird inconsistency then fuckin' LOL welcome to the last 75% of Homestuck

>>87654552
Hahaha no no Zack wasn't being clever with it he was just typing the plot points in twitter.

ARGs are legit

>>87654571
Caliborn contacted jake in pre retcon b2 and talked about erisol

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>>87654534

>>87654564
Yeah reading Cohen's twitter is just depressing at this point. Dude's clearly lost it

>>87654584
Yeah so, Caliborn can see literally all of spacetime because of the towers in LOCAM that he unlocked all of

How does it feel like to have become the lolcow, /hst/?

>>87654584
presumably caliborn can see the game over timeline on his monitors
if you want some real continuity errors, try and figure out where Union Jack came from in the retcon timeline or try to follow the full timeline of the crowbar

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>>87654591
The dankest president

>>87654484
If you're talking about the person who asked why people aren't getting pissed (I'm assuming you are since you said "talking about homestuck anywhere else"), it's me.
And I don't ship caliroxy as anything other than pale/best budd because I'm a sucker for (what used to be) canon.


If not, I'll just say I'm not happy with how it's turned out. I just wanted cute Roxy/Callie girltalk sessions, dammit.

>>87654595
In all my work to try to help unity and common sense I've just become so disgusted and tired of this endless worthless hysteria

Yeah the sky is fucking falling asshole so START DIGGING INSTEAD OF CRYING ABOUT IT

worthless fucking trendy cunts

>>87654609
>lolcow

Why?

>>87654627
>Union Jack came from in the retcon timeline
I thought vriska did it

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>>87654609
Better than being a fattie, I guess.

>>87654663
Because we didn't eat this shit up apparently.
It's like saying "Haha look at these fags, they didn't waste money on hiveswap! such lolcows!"

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>>87654665
it wasn't explicitly stated in the story, and something as dumb as that really should be
>captcha: road road

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HSG. Tell me which character, which one character, you felt got cheated the absolute most and are most bitter about. I don't give a shit about your opinion, your ships, or that you think the other guy has shit taste, because you're currently wallowing in it already.

For me, it was Spades Slick.

>>87654715
Spades Slick, easily.

>>87650065
I still enjoy it

>>87654715
yeah spades slick for me too

>>87654686
Funny how you only see criticism of Hiveswap on forums without self-moderating communities

it's almost like most fans are looking forward to the game and you're a small minority of haters

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Why?
Just why?

>>87654697
Yeah but she did make the ither b2 sprites in the retcon timeline and she already made 1 super powered jack why not another. Or union jack is from preretcon and got there via the furthest ring

>>87654157
Trans is next, so get ready for Davepeta to come back and get with Jade.

Sad how something that's only half straight is the only thing to look forward to now..

>>87654715
I agree with SS, though I'm not too happy about how John currently is.

>>87654755
you've got some dicks to suck to establish that bi cred, coey

>>87654715
Tue of slick and karkat

>>87654759
Do you want my dead honest opinion?

Hussie was taking a SHITLOAD of uppers. Adderall, Provigil, the works. Then he went clean and it fucking destroyed him after years of constant use.

>>87654755
>it's almost like most fans are looking forward to the game and you're a small minority of haters

Bet Cohen thought Trump fans were a small minority of Hillary haters, but here we are.

>>87654770
>how John currently is.
Sad depressed morrose john is the most emotion hes ever shown so im fine with it hoping it leads to john showing more emotions

>>87654762
it's stupid because she'd be making him just so her own team mates will have to fight him later
it's not like bec noir where she had the benefit of future sight and was doing it for glory
this is just acting senselessly for plot convenience

>>87654663
>Thinking Cohen and his ilk aren't laughing at your pain right now and doing it to piss you off

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>>87654121
A box I see people inside is the idea that worldbuilding is prescriptive, like a bottom-up design: the elements dictate the story. Really it should be the other way around: whatever the story needs, you get the elements and fit them in, and worldbuilding is how you secure these elements in their places.

What can a Prince of Void do? -> destroy absences -> wreck things that are hidden ... now how do I make a story around it?
-- or --
The story will have a theme of how secrets can wreck people and relationships -> I'll have some dangerous secrets, some secrets people have about themselves, secrets they keep from themselves, secrets they use to control others -> let's have a character whose role is to wreck secrets, for examples of how people are better off being honest, maybe a growth/learning arc from just ruining secrets to being more subtle and compassionate about the fears that create secrets -> Prince of Void sounds right for this

>>87654755
if the game is good and has positive reviews I'll try it

but I know it ain't gonna be food

>>87654762
also: the furthest ring is affected by retcons, because of the duplicate dave & rose problem

>>87654715
I will never not be bitter about post-act 5 Rose.

>>87654799
I would agree, but I too am an ADHD degenerate.

>>87654818
>this is just acting senselessly for plot convenience
Just like making another arquiu?

>>87654768
Davepeta isn't a boy or a girl so it's not even "half straight" :^)

>>87654715
What happened to him, anyways? I stopped reading a while ago and I never catched up with his storyline, I think, unless I forgot

>>87652508
Can she even progress? I mean she's not a living cherub anymore, she's a ghost made corporeal through a magic ring. I don't think she even has an alternate personality anymore, so she's even more stunted than Caliborn.

>>87654858
yeah
there's a lot of senseless stuff for plot convenience in post-retcon, but at least the arquius thing was acknowledged

>>87654848
Oh there's nothing wrong with it. I hit all that shit, but I don't ever use it for active work or constantly. It just makes perfect sense since I lived in those areas too, and it was flooded to the idiot gills with a rainbow of stims every college kid was chugging. How else do you explain 2 years of psychotic output and a sudden hard crash.

>>87654845
What you dont like drunk lesbians? Or just lesbian post retcon

>>87654820
Laughing at the dwindling popularity of their income source while they scramble to put out a game that's four years late?

>>87654715
SS, for sure, at least for pre-credit stuff.
Post-credit I gotta say I'm feeling bad for John.

>>87654869
He died fighting another Jack, Dave, Terezi, and Dirk.

He never saw English. Never stabbed him. Never saw Karkat again, nothing.

>>87654880
Well he is a rich white boy from that area with a tremendous work ethic and output rate

Your theory has a lot of weight

>>87654755
I understand you spend all your time in /r/homestuck and thus have no idea what it's like outside the echo chamber, but elsewhere that's not the case. The numbers for Homestuck dropped off, the credits just recently got around 225k views, the kickstarter was filled with comments that were chiding them from the lack of updates. MSPAF was in a similar boat (you know, that giant concentration of Homestuck fans) before it was conveniently destroyed, and the forum that started up in its place is just as unsatisfied.
Maybe if stepped outside the world of your passive-aggressive friends icels, you'd see that things aren't that great.

>>87654869
In the battle royal in collixe he got his head cut off along with dirk and union jack by dave

>>87654884
Lesbians disgust me and she's objectively more boring than ever, but I didn't care for the drinking stuff either

I'll be honest, Cohen won. The Backers will never get their money back.

But Hiveswap won't sell for shit. So that's a silver lining, I suppose.

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>>87654715
Fucking Bro, easily the coolest character

>>87654755
>self-moderating communities
lol

>>87654893
>Posters: 52
When will you realize that /hst/ is literally nothing?

>>87654901
Exactly. Rich white boy, and those boys got a LOT of goddamn drugs lying around, and stims have a 'clean' rep that isn't dirty like the 'bad party' drugs. I've seen a lot of friends go psychotic from constant abuse or having to drop them.

>>87654934
You're proving my point?

Dwindling popularity.

Do you think this is fucking 2012? Homestuck is barely anything now, and the game they're farting out will be the last nail in the coffin.

>>87654910
>>87654898
What the fuck, who thought this was a good idea

>>87654934
because we're the only ones who hate it enough to keep talking about it
most people have enough mental health to realize when they should cut their losses and move on

I have an idea. We have to build a huge wall between Cohen and Homestuck/Hiveswap/Tweeter/other shit, then we need to bring Hussie back and slap him, so he could get angry and excited and not tired of homestuck shit. Make homestuck great again!

>>87654958
Andrew Hussie, the man, the myth, the monster

>>87654973
and make Cohen pay for it

>>87654958
Hussie. He had slick hold union jack in a headlock while jack held dirk. Then dave cut through all 3 of them and the unbreakable katana and time travelled away

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I hope Hussies ever writes something good as Problem Sleuth or Homestuck, probably not, he should be burned out for good now.

Is it too gay to say that he is one of the greatest writers of our time? (He did fuck up though when he introduced trolls to the mix)

>>87654929
It's such a fucking non-argument too. "My thing is good because it's popular!".
Like you can't even argue for it's quality, that's the only angle you can go at.

Maybe the writer of PS and HS really WAS Hussie Sr.

Cohen's tumblr inbox is open, you should send him not on my watch and maybe he'll get triggered enough to stop