Real Life Superheroes

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Its illegal and super heroes would get their ass beat in real life because criminals don't play fair.

ever

>>86772392
This thread again?
Do crossboarders come to /co/ specifically to ask that question or something?
At least it's not racebait I guess.

>>86772392
Because in real life you can't dodge bullets and criminals frequently travel in groups and the police will catch you and put you in jail.

>>86772443
>mayo is gross
>no crust
Jesus Hickman, way to make Spidey look tasteless.

IRL mooks are armed and don't miss

>>86772392
ever hear of a group called the Ku Klux Klan? a whole bunch of masked vigilantes...

>>86772534
It depends of what class of sandwich we're talking, if it has chicken on it, mayo absolutely, it's a beef sandwich then ketchup it's better

Because the idea is retarded.

>>86772392
Your average policeman is stronger than any superhero.

>>86772392
People already tell you anon, real criminal is going to shot you right into the head, no bullshit. There no plot armor in real life

>>86772534
It was meant to make him look childish.

>>86772392
They do, but from what I understand they're more like the community watch with flashy costumes.

Nice people I bet, but people trying to be Kick-Ass or The Punisher are likely to get themselves hurt/killed, get someone else hurt/killed or just break the law.

>>86772392
>So how come no one's really tried being a superhero?
Because unless you have access to thousands of dollars worth of good body armor, have been trained in the ways of properly subduing an enemy in a fast and efficient manner and have great health insurance for when you inevitably get your ass kicked, being a vigilante/superhero is a pipedream.

There have probably been people that tried to be the hero, but they mostly ended up is a gutter with their life nearly beaten out of them.

Motherfucker watch the movie you posted in OP and you get a good answer. Before it becomes wish fulfillment he gets fucking stabbed in a goddamn alley and left for dead.

Which is exactly what would happen to some brightly colored idiot that went wound trying to stop actual crime.

>>86772762
It's also worth noting that there's plenty of people who fit that criteria, and they're mostly working in the upper echelons of organized crime. Mostly people fresh out of spec ops. South American ones are particularly bad about it but it's not unheard of for british and american ones to do it as well

>>86772596
Roastbeef is also better with mayo, as is tuna.
Really it's mostly if it's a ham sandwich that mayo becomes a sin.

>>86772653
Kids don't like mayo?

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>>86772392

There is a HBO documentary about real life superheroes. It's partly cool and partly sad. It makes more sense just handing out food and supplies to homeless people not actually trying to beat down criminals.

>>86772392
>>86772488

Saw this and thought "yeah, haven't we gotten bored with this extremely obvious bs thread like a long time ago?"

>"WHY DON'T MORE PEOPLE PUT RAT POISON ON THEIR SANDWICHES? THE LABEL SAYS IT'S BAD FOR YOU BUT WHAT IF IT TASTES REALLY GOOD BECAUSE I HEARD IT TASTES AWESOME AND YOU MIGHT GET POWERS."

>>86772534
If Susan goddammed Storm offered to lovingly cut the crust off a sandwich she made just for me?

Oh lord would I'd say yes and then cherish every bite.

>>86773281
>Roastbeef is also better with mayo, as is tuna
Thats a obvious one anon, you can't have tuna without the mayo

It's like this
imagine you had the power to cure any major illness (and only major ones), but nobody would ever come to you. In fact, they'd do their best to stay away from you. how many people do you think you'd reasonably cure? Would you spend all day, every day, just wandering the streets, hoping you catch someone coughing blood into a rag? Trying to pinpoint the cases of street people catching a bloodborne illness from a drug needle (and getting flak if you too-often exclusively patrol the homeless because it looks like you're singling them out, just because it's a lot easier to find sickness there)?
Let's say you DID find those people everydamnwhere you look. Do you think you could make a difference, curing the ones you come across in a day? they don't stay healthy forever, they're still able to get reinfected. Sometimes the ambulance carts a few of them off to try to knock some sense into them about maintaining good health practices, but other than that... you're on your own
do you really think you'll make a DENT in that problem?

>>86772392
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phoenix_Jones

Over here in Seattle there is a guy who goes by Phoenix Jones. He used to be an MMA fighter and decided to be a vigilante after he witnessed some crimes first-hand. He roams the streets sometimes in a ballistic suit and does what he can to stop fights and theft, reporting to the police if something is too much for him to stop. He even used to lead the "Rain City Superhero Movement", with other like-minded people to patrol the streets in order to prevent crime.

Watch Defendor

>>86775030
He's a loser and that "Superhero Movement" is a lot of bullshit.

>>86772392
A couple of reasons
1) its illegal
2) its very dangerous
3) It is incredibly ineffective (seriously how much crime do you think you will find just roaming the streets at night? you'd be lucky just to find some drug dealer to call the cops on)
4) If a person really had the passion and desire to stop crime or make his community safer they would probably train to become a police officer or a social worker.

>>86772392
super powers don't exist, yet. unless power armor, cybernetic enhancements or genetic enhancements show up its gonna be like this. the only thing i'd see happening is some punisher type trying to shoot up a gang or something but will eventually get gunned down by cops.

>>86775292
If power armor cybernetic augmentation or magical gene splicing that works the way you think it will work happens then criminals will use it too

>>86772392
Because going out to fight crime wearing nothing but spandex and using your fists is a surefire way to get yourself shot or stabbed, there's a reason cops use guns and level II vests.

>>86772534
>he likes egg-white and cream cum spread on his sandwich
I hear Canadians love the shit out of mayo, any canadi-anons here to confirm/explain why?

>>86772392
It's not practical. Maybe if you had the budget of Bruce Wayne you could do it, but people with that kind of money can make more of a difference by using their influence to affect the actions of others.

>>86776290
If you had the money of Bruce Wayne the most effecient way to solve crime would be to prop up local businesses to keep jobs.

>>86774094
>>86775253

What if there's a real problem area in your city, like a place where violent crimes often happen because it's poorly lit, out of the way or just a favorite place for gangs to hang out. Would patrolling these areas make a real tangible difference? Whether or not you'll survive your encounters is a different story, but acting as pro bono private security can make a real life difference in places where the cops can't afford to patrol every night.

>>86775292
If those existed. If a single man had actual superpowers and decided to stop crime i wonder how successful could he really be. Sure he could stop or prevent obvious crimes but Real Life is way more complicated than that. Powerful men would use media to make him public enemy number one. It's easier to blame things on people that stands out.

>>86775335
This as well. A world with superheroes won't last long without generating supervillains of some sort. It will be a whole new arms race.

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>>86772392
>So how come no one's really tried being a superhero? Or a vigilante at the very least.

Because they don't dress like superheroes when they do it, it tends to end up more like this (minus all the cheering)

>>86772706

Funnily enough the current president of the Philippinnes has the nickname of The Punisher from back when he was a mayor. He got the name due to his policy of cleaning up the streets of his town from crime using the time-honored SEA tradition of using death squads.

>>86776458
Reminds me of Gran Torino. It was pretty sad yet cool how Eastwood's character acknowledged that going Punisher will only bring more misery to his Asian neighbor friends so he instead used himself as sacrifice to place some heavy legal charges on the evil gang.

>>86776458
god that movie was fun

>>86773442
>he doesn't put rat poison on his sandwiches
are you a man or a mouse?

>>86776489

Yeah but in the 1970s crime was WAY worse than it is now, like people bitch about crime now but it has nothing on back then. It was so bad and the police so ineffective that vigilantes outright shooting muggers and being celebrated by the people (but not the cops or judges) became a real thing. Especially in NYC.

>>86776506

Forgot link, but this was the 80s
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1984_New_York_City_Subway_shooting
>shot 4 men
>cleared of all charges aside from carrying an unlicensed weapon
That's how much the people wanted guys like that.

>>86772392
Well, Seattle has Phoenix Jones. He says he's a superhero. He certainly has a costume and has fought crime.

>>86772392
>So how come no one's really tried being a superhero? Or a vigilante at the very least.
A lot of shooters and mass murderers actually THINK they are doing society a favour. There are vast differences between wanting to be a hero, and actually BEING one.

Most wannabe heroes become villains.

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>>86776753
RIP in peace chocolate Rambo.

>>86772392
Not a superhero but...

There is already a real life Kira, and he is a politician.
Bonus points for being Asian.

Because usually ther are as pathetic as this poor bastard. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0BIIdMU8G2c

>>86772392

You cant become a superhero without superhuman feats. And vigilantes work dont get as much recognition from the officials as they do in comic books.

Plus some home-made gadgets and black belt in karate dont really help against guns.

>>86777365
Where'd he get his stand?

patrolling and being a reactive bitch is what everyone pictures when they say crime fighting. but a guy or a group of guys could have info on organizations that take part in drug and human trafficking and seeking out those specific criminals in their specific spots much like how spec ops operate and take them down like that. this would allow for better planning and a more efficient way of fighting crime.

you dont see special ops guys sitting on their asses in the desert waiting for shit to happen, they go in specific zones, with some intelligence beforehand in order to achieve a specific tasks, not to fuck around on the streets until they catch a hobo taking a piss on somebody's car

most faggots in this kind of threads are just stupid pussies who can't imagine not getting your ass kicked because that's all they've experienced in life and now they're projecting on the internet. being a vigilante if you're fucking around is dangerous but it can be pulled off pretty easily

>>86772392
Umm.... they fucking have. There are people doing it right now.

http://rlsh.wikia.com/wiki/Category:RLSH_Profiles

I have seen The Variable (http://rlsh.wikia.com/wiki/The_Variable) in person.

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>>86772392
>who is Phoenix Jones?

>>86772392
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3485501/Bulgarian-gangster-organises-migrant-hunting-patrols-Turkish-border.html

I know the "journalist" is dismissive and trying to act all high and mighty but Dinko is a fucking legend

>>86772392
PJ is the only one of the RLSH ive seen actually go out snd fight criminal scum and evil doers

others are just neighborgood watch

but hey whatever its fine

there was this RLSH who died of cancer, and his friend carried his casket in costume death of superman style

>>86775223
You're a loser, and that "Superhero Movement" is awesome.

>>86772488
>>86773442
When I saw this thread last week all I thought was how many times are people gonna have this thread? There was another like last month too. The board recycles subjects too often.

The economic circumstances that create crime aren't solved by punching common criminals. Even the law enforcers are corrupt when they'te tied to a capitalist government. Poverty and crime are a necessary result of capitalism and free market. The solution is for the working class to rise up in a socialist revolution.

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>>86779415
found it

How would you yourself in a costume defeat a real life villain like Captain Killdozer?

>>86779683
I wouldn't because Killdozer was a hero

>>86772392
What do you mean by no one tried? The whole Russian military from the time of motherland war , and foregin service have or had super heros. And Putin is Ozymadias level of power, insight and sexual appetite.

>>86779683
RPG.

>>86772392
I thought there are whole bunch of
appearing and disappearing (wannabe) real life costumed heroes.
Last case I heard - some guy, calling himself Reaper appeared in Moscow.
According to his Twitter he (with police support) arrested several drugdealers, injured his back and now recovering.

>>86772392
Because superheroes are originally the powerfantasy of children.

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>>86778729
I had no idea...

How is this being ignored?! How is this not /thread?!

The answer is that some people do try, and once in awhile we get hero out of it.

i'd honestly expect a supervillain before a superhero.

look at the zodiac killer, that was some riddler bullshit he did. some nutjob is going to get the bright idea to dress up in a costume and kill people because they'll remember the costume instead of the person.

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Chances are people that put on elaborate costumes do so out of personal desire to be noticed/acknowledged by masses and less about the "justice" they want to meet out. Most vigilantism are isolated cases and simply differed to as more random violence. Unless it's tied to political/nationalist agendas like Jo Cox's murder or the burnt down refugee centers.

People that are dumb enough to put on silly pajamas would likely just be targeted by criminals and beaten to a pulp.

>>86780437
Vigilantism in the case of Jo Cox/When a government either refuses/neglects/fails to protect their people become a very noble act. Especially when said body of government opts to punish the people rather than the criminal element.

>>86772585
You mean domestic terrorists.

>>86772644
You are my nigga

>>86780336
wife beater scandal
he hurt people that didnt need to be hurt because "words were said"

the 'hero society' being made is some strange name and international, yet never spoken of here

(they're mostly social workers iirc)

>>86775837
Probably their French heritage
t. Pierre

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Given some of the comments about the Punisher in this thread, it's almost like /co/ thinks that the concept of a vigilante is fictional, and that comics invented it.

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What about real life muties or "supers" (people way outside of the norm in terms of ability to do something)?
That's a more interesting topic.

>>86780638
stan lee series?

this world is filled to the brim with superheroes and vigilantes.

they don't wear retarded spandex costumes, or have inhuman abilities. but they do have a rusty ak-47 and some old boots. you can commonly find them in south american jungles and middle eastern shitholes, enduring horrors that would make any capefaggot shit their pants.

>>86780518
Criminals can be citizens too.
Batman intentionally strikes fear and panic into the criminal element of Gotham
Batman terrorizes citizens of his hometown.
By definition Batman is a terrorist.

>>86779520
I've been here since 2008.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pX4qZcjiv5U

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>>86780388
Well, there IS the whole "killer clowns" meme that's been circulating for a few weeks.

We get this thread every single day. Fuck off.

>>86772392
People have tried it. They have usually gotten arrested, beaten up, and/or killed, and they have never put so much as a tiny dent in crime.

>>86772392
Because it's retarded and unfeasible.

You'd get too injured too consistently, on top of trying to make enough money to pay off bills and then crime-fighting at night.

>>86772392
there has been a few, but they gone public about it, so not really a ideal one.

>>86776439
>acting as pro bono private security can make a real life difference in places where the cops can't afford to patrol every night.
Yeah, like your one silly, inane death would really stop criminals from frequenting an area that's poorly lit.

>>86780336
Stupid costume. Good luck against mace. Have fun getting your teeth punched out and your nose broken.

His joints are unprotected. Good luck against a metal pipe and guns.

>>86781370
Wait what?
He's not fucking batman, are you retarded? He's not a one man army and doesn't pretend to be.
He's just patrolling at night stopping fights and stuff. If someone draws a gun on him he won't do shit/surely don't want to do shit.
Also, street fights RARELY involve 'pipes' and 'maces'. We're not in the 80's anymore.
The armor etc is just there because 'we never know', and under the effects of adrenaline there isn't that many people that would aim the head.
Just get out of your basement at night and see how street fights work.

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Being a super hero you need to have an advantage to stop criminals.

1. Logistics

You have to be there before the crime. How are you going to do that? Unless you have inside knowledge of things, you're kind of in the dark as to what to do. Cities are huge.

2. More Powerful

suppose 1 on 1 you're a decent fighter, ok, they have knives, guns whatever else, what do you have combat this? What if it's 4 on one, how are you going to come out on top, what is your edge?

3. what's your end game?

You can't just tie up criminals and leave them in front of the police station. Are you punisher style, killing the criminals.... now you're wanted too.

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>>86772392
>obligatory

>>86782047
>You can't just tie up criminals and leave them in front of the police station.

You can if they're muggers you interupted in the middle of a crime.

And if you don't have a secret indentity, you can even testify against them, which expands it to crimes without other witnesses like burglary.

Wear a Go-Pro or a body cam and you have footage of them committing a crime before you apprehend them, too.

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Hi! We're your State Police.

We uphold the law, investigate crimes, apprehend criminals, and risk our lives on a frighteningly regular basis to defend you and your property from all sorts of really nasty characters.

And we do it all with grit, gumption, and detective work -- no super-powers necessary!

Unfortunately, all too often it feels like we're protecting a world that hates and fears us. Not everyone agrees with the laws that we've sworn to uphold, but it IS the law, and we're bound by duty to do our jobs as best we can.

>>86784177
>disclaimer: not valid in New Jersey

You need super skills/powers in order to detect and stop bad guys.

It's in the name. SUPER hero.

If you're going for a "no power" superhero you have to understand all "no power" superheros have the power to beat up a room full of thugs armed with guns. Its a conceit of the genre that knowing kung fu makes you very, very deadly.

Grant Morrison talks about a book in Supergods that dealt with what a person had to do to become Batman. The conclusion was that if you took a guy with perfect health and trained them to be a superhero since they were a kid they'll have an optimal 2-4 year window of operation beating up badguys until physical wear and tear forces them to retire.

For all that trouble just become a Navy SEAL.

>>86784177
>HANDS UP DON'T SHOOT

Ned Kelly. You are all centuries too late.

>>86784290
Just don't make any aggressive movements and comply with our commands -- they're in place to keep everyone safe and to prevent unnecessary violence.

>>86784358
>complies with authorities
>follows all orders from police
>is shot anyway
sure feels good being black

>>86784445
That is, generally speaking, not what happens.

Could we get a list of "Real" Superhero and SuperVillains?
You know, the larger than life goodies and baddies that stuck out from the rest.
Kek, I'll start

Villains
>Zodiac
>Anton Lavey
>Al Capone

Heroes
>Muhammad Ali

>>86784545
Pilot Sullivan to the Hero column, please!

>>86778281
All you have to do is carry a gun and shoot before they know you have it.

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>>86779683

Killdozer was a hero imo

>>86780638

Swampthing and the Thing is a dude already.

Is pretty /fa/ too

>>86781370

Guns and knifes are somewhat common depending on where you live. But nobody carries pipes. Usually it's gonna be fists man.

Also I don't think PJ really fights that many people. Probably just hands out supplies to homeless more often than anything.

Posted this in the last thread:

I started seeing used heroin needles along my street and the street next to mine, where I walk my dogs. I bought a reflective vest, a headlamp, a UV-5R for the blinking beacon, and I started walking my dogs at night.

We now regularly chase shady characters out of the park located on the block next to mine, embarrass folks having very public domestic disputes, and have on a few occasions provided our town cops with info about cars they were looking for.

No weapons, no ninja tactics - just an obvious presence, a radio, and three dogs. It's amazing what you can deter with just your presence.

Defendor and Super were better movies

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>>86772392
They're too busy being busy being wizards

>>86784545
Lavey never actually hurt anyone, did he? Just pranced around doing weird ceremonies afaik.

>>86776753
We had a guy in the UK a few years ago who would kill police.

>>86772392
They do. Less so with superheroes, and the ones that do exist aren't that successful. Vigilantes however exist all the time, especially in countries in turmoil. Most people, though, if they want to spend hours a day fighting crime, they join the police.

>>86776439
Yeah. These people do exist.

I remember hearing a story about some city near the border that was so crime-infested that even the police wouldn't touch it. A bunch of law enforcement and military guys from neighboring towns got together and coordinated full vigilante justice on the place, off-the-records.

Vigilantes comes into existence when the system has failed to the point where extreme measures are needed. You'd probably see a lot more of it in Chicago if BLM ever achieves their goal of driving out the police once and for all.

>>86776524
I grew up in the 2000's, well after crime started dropping, and people seemed pretty on-edge as was. How did people bear the 80's?

>>86772392
Doing the cops job
for free

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>>86784233
kek

>>86776524
It's because while NYC has lousy gun laws, they have excellent self-defense laws.

Goetz is hardly the first person or last person in the City who's shot a mugger with an illegal weapon and only got charged (much less convicted) of gun possession.

He probably wouldn't have even been charged if it wasn't for Al Sharpton and his ilk insisting that this meek little man on his way to work who was surrounded by 4 teenage giants with long rap sheets was a murderous racist looking to murder some good boys who didn't do nuttin.

>>86786955
As a child of the 80s growing up in NYC, I can tell you that it felt like civilization was collapsing. Crime was at record levels and rising every year. People were getting mugged in broad daylight in even the richest neighborhoods. The police advised everyone to carry money on them at all times because thugs were likely to beat you, if not murder you, if you didn't have anything to give them when they robbed you. Crime was scarier then the threat of nuclear war, even when Reagan was President.


Ever read Batman and wonder how Gotham City could be so terrible? That was what all our big cities were like from the 60s - 80s. It wasn't until our generation became teenagers that the crime rates dropped.

I never would have imaged as a kid that when I was an adult, the pendulum would swing so fiercely that I would be more worried about the cops then about criminals.

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>>86772392
>>86775030

>>86776439
>What if there's a real problem area in your city, like a place where violent crimes often happen because it's poorly lit, out of the way or just a favorite place for gangs to hang out.
fire, and lots of it.

>>86779415
>RLSH
>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Real-life_superhero
>A vigilante, known as the "Bromley Batman", has been seen in action by several witnesses saving people from knife-wielding gangs and muggers in South London.[50] His activities have been reported as far as Cornwall.
I want to know just who the hell this badass motherfucker is.
>"Terrifica" is a New York City-based woman who patrols bars and parties in an effort to prevent inebriated women from being taken advantage of by men. Since the mid-1990s, Terrifica has donned a mask, blonde wig, red boots and cape, because in her words women "need to be protected from themselves".
I want to give her the benefit of the doubt, but to much of this description sounds like she's just a feminist cockblocker

>>86780875
nah, Infowars tells me you can only be labeled a terrorist if what you do is for political aims. That's why Dylan Roof's church massacre isn't terrorism.

>>86787786
>Only beats up drunks

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>>86773281

>roast beef with mayo
>tuna no mayo

Clown sightings in my two nights ago.

I rode my bike around town dressed in bright colors with a Bo Staff the last two nights.
Saw some ripped shirtless guy on a minibike with a bright color-shifting light attachment. He was escorted by a musclecar.

>>86772392
The closest you could get would be Punisher style "no prisoners" guys with the guns and training to take on the average street criminal. If one surfaced that was lucky enough and clever enough to avoid getting himself killed liberals would throw a bitch fit until law enforcement caught them.

>>86788159
Well Roof did have some political goals, albeit retarded ones. The trouble with calling Dylan Roof a terrorist is that if you want to throw "general racial grievances" under the "political terrorism" label you've got to come around to Black Lives Matter too.

>>86780336
nice try phoenix jones

>>86788159
>>86788464

Before 9/11, the definition of terrorism was non-uniformed actors attacking civilians for political purposes.

It was only under Dubya that the compliant media echoed his implications that terrorism is "anyone trying to scare people". Which would make the killer klown hoaxers running around right now "terrorists".

Roof is a terrorist. BLM inspired murderers aren't, because they shooting armed, uniformed government personnel. If one of them just started shooting random white people, they would be terrorists.