What would you do if you woke up in the MCU?

Stay the fuck away from New York.

Avoid large cities in general.
Except to sell Matt's identity to the Kingpin, because we all know that's going to happen eventually and I might as well make a profit off of it.

Kill myself for being so poorly written. But I'll most likely make a quip before I draw my last breath.

>>86660003
>implying he doesn't already suspect who Devil is.

>>86660003
>implying this would turn out well for you

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>>86659958
>Smashed by Hulk
>Attacked by aliens
>Invaded by Ninjas
>Filled with tons of organized crime, including big bald beastmode shut-ins who smash heads, Irish who torture people and drill into their feet, Black Harlem gun runners who also run extortion rackets, and Puerto Ricans who only eat half of a Milky Way bar and waste the rest.
>Police force is corrupted by multiple of these forces
>Has had a literal mind controller come in and force people to commit suicide, a bible-quoting psycho who creates hostage situations at rallies, a retired general who shoots public officials in their offices, and many vigilantes, some of which are murderers, and no one can seem to get a handle on any of it.
I'd say that's a pretty solid plan.

>>86659923
The Gwen pool route

>>86659923
>the MCU
look for a portal to 616

>>86659958
This.

If I were to live in the MCU, I'd want superpowers for insurance policy.

>>86659958
Its bad enough in the normal marvel universe but is a far dumber decision to live there in the MCU even though it is less dangerous on paper. I mean there are like 3 people who havent had climactic battles at least once in New York (1 of those 3 being the guardians but theres a big chance a wormhole just opens in central park and their ship crashes there)

>>86659958
This.

Colorado seems relatively safe.

>>86660326
act like a retard? weird.

>>86659923
Kill all muties

I need to get to the Avengers. Easiest way to do this would be to find Peter Parker. Much more accessible than the avengers base. Then I get him to bring me to the avengers, I explain my situation, and then just hang out there. Try to give them as much info I can about what I know from the comics and movies.

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Gotta get myself a costume and gimmick so I don't die like a filthy, old extra.

>>86661776
I feel like this wouldn't work. They'd probably think you were some spy.

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>>86659923
Get in as many freak 'accidents' and if I die before getting powers then thats how the cookie crumbles

Start an insurance agency in New York

>>86661748
>MCU
>muties

>>86660004
Whedon isn't part of MCU anymore.

>>86662448
>Wants to get powers from freak accident
>Posts mutants

>Waking up in MCU
>Posting Mutants

The state of Hollywood in the MCU would be pretty shit. Think of all the good movies/TV shows MCU actors have been in. The Wire would be fucked up without the guys playing Lester, Greggs, Barksdale, Omar, and Stringer Bell.

>Move to a small town in Alaska
>Buy several powerful guns
>Fully train myself in using each one
>Maximise quippage
>Attract qt with my quip mastery
>Never vacation to a major city or tourist destination
>Never work a government job

Become caretaker in Xavier's school for the gifted. Live in the most well protected building in America, and cuck Wolverine and Cyclops.

>>86659923
Make as many quips as I can.

>>86659923
I would wonder why AOS is non canon

Live with Hawkeye and Velma with visitations from Scarlet Witch.

>>86660326
>>86661778
Comics have different tropes from the MCU. You'd just be a character in an episode or two of AoS who gets killed off.

>>86659923
Do my best to cuck Vision.

>>86663046
This.

I would tell Cap that while I have no powers I will devote myself to the vital mission of providing Wanda with cuddles.