Homestuck

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The Retcon.

Oh hey, I know that the whole finale of Act 5 was about "retconning the universe", but let's go more meta and LITERALLY retcon the story so I can have muh Spider Waifu back

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>>84059556
mituna

>>84059587
This

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http://www.strawpoll.me/10588775

>>84059556
The dreambubbles. Without dreambubbles being a thing, a lot of other dumb garbage would never have happened too, like the retcon, or the journey to the next session taking three fucking years of timeskipped awfulness.

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Do carapacians have different traits depending on the species that plays the session?

>Slick is confirmed bi, but Jack has only been interested in women
>Snowman has blue blood while the kids' queen had red blood
>Jack killed the queen out of hate, while slick was able to have a breif black relationship with Snowman
>Caliborn's jack was paid in candy to assassinate Calliope, and cherubs love candy. I cantsee slick or the kids' Jack accepting candy as a payment.

>>84059556
I want to say Dancestors.

Without them you don't have Aranea's pointless villain arc, and without that you don't have the retcon. And without the dreambubbles being marred with their pointlessness, MAYBE they could have been something interesting.

At least it could have given Feferi something to do.

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>>84059590
Making fun of the mentally diseased isn't very nice senpai.

>>84059743
The retcon ruined everything. All negatives about Homestuck tie back into the retcon. It is the alpha and omega of Homestuck's flaws.

>>84059681
homestuck 2.0 by FAR
>h-hey guys we know homestuck is over BUT LOOK HERES A B-LIST ACTOR AND HUSSIE PETTING A HORSE also we're gonna respond to fans more and plug-in fan-content actually wait no we're not

>>84059556
JUJUS

>>84059743
retcon still happens without aranea. as long as the juju is a thing it has to be needed, its a huge chekhovs gun. any other excuse for game over could have been found.

>>84059462
Thats clearly rose pretending to be john

>>84059702
>>Slick is confirmed bi
No he isn't. What?

>>84059556
The retcon. The dreambubbles may have had their stupid moments, as did all the teen drama and all the other shit people moan about, but the story was still pretty damn good up until Game Over imo.

>>84059556
The Retcon for sure, it was final solution levels of bad for the narrative and characters, which are pretty damn important in a story like Homestuck. The dreambubbles would be a runner up, but they're more misused than they are flat out bad, horribly horribly misused in a way that makes death have little to no impact.

>>84059702
What? Dude, slick loves candy. Remember the Scratch intermission where he filled his pockets with them?

Davekat

>>84059827
>baby using glasses
man those are some weak-ass genetics

>>84059827
10/10

>>84059861
>like a ship with no chemistry or even bantz
>>84059849
>>84059838
My biggest issue with the retcon is that, as of game over the character where all pretty much at their lowest and when GO happened they were finally getting their shit sorted out and making progress.
Take for example the conversation between rose and terezi on Rose's land. They finally realized what fuckups they were and resolved to change that to prepare for what was coming, they hit their low and were finally on the rebound. jokes about the monomyth aside, it was so refreshing to finally see them overcome their shit and move forward.
Then when the retcon hit we didn't have that anymore. It was just 'lmao all those problems were solved thanks to vriska' and when "everyone" meets up again, they were just normal. They really didn't have any stake in what was happening and did things just because thats what needed to happen for the story to end. There wasn't a low point followed by a moment of triumph or renewal. They were just the "same" dumb teens they always were.
They didn't learn and sure as shit didn't grow with the exception of Dave, but thats a whole other can of worms.
Everything after the retcon was just so phoned in and unsatisfying in the most basic narrative faction.
Like if someone gets punched off their ass and then gets back up, you feel good because they choose to get up and keep fighting, but in homestucks case, they just got tapped on the shoulder and kept going through the motions

Time for unpopular Homosuck opinions. I'll start.

>Dancestors weren't bad, just wasted
>Acts 1 through 3 aren't as good as some make them out to be
>DaveRezi is ok

>>84059759
8=D < Damara... Neigh... I trusted you.. With Cronus...

>>84060068
>Acts 1 through 3 aren't as good as some make them out to be
The man with no taste.png

>>84060068
I agree with all of this except for the Acts.

>>84060068
>Daverezi was okay
How is this unpopular? I thought that here especially, people liked the ship. They made a cute couple.

>>84060096
Hey, they're still good in all their in-jokey fucking about progamming joke filled glory, but nostalgia might be clouding some people's minds when they claim Act 1 is one of the best parts of the comic. Intermission is still 10/10 though.

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>>84060068
REMINDER

DAVEREZI IS GODLY

DAVEJADE SHIPPERS ARE TRYING TO CORRUPT THE YOUTH WITH THEIR FUCKING SHIT GARBAGE

"IT DIDNT WORK OUT" IS JUST BREEDER PROPAGANDA

THINK
FOR
YOURSELF

#LOVEWINS
#DIVERSITY

>>84060068
i actually think daverezi is pretty great.

>>84060144
>They made a cute couple.
That we never got to see

>>84060012
I think it's near enough unanimously agreed upon that the retcon was a massive narrative fuckup and was the irredeemable point for the comic, from what it once was. I think your commentary on your read through actually helped show the threads at the time that not all of Act 6 was terrible, certainly it was better read archivaly than with live updates. But even still, when it got to the retcon it was just sad; sad reading through it, sad seeing you read through it and even sadder thinking about what could have been both with John's powers and the story as a whole after Game Over's massive stakes.

>>84060146
daverezi is living proof dave isn't black

don't you think terezi would have commented on his delicious chocolate skin if he was black?

>>84060146
She chose the clown and Vriska over Dave it's over man

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>>84059851
Good point. Maybe I'm just reading too much into this.
>>84059834
Hussie wrote TIDoMS, it's pretty safe to say it's canon.

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>>84060144
They had great chemistry, but it's one of those pairings that we never got to see much of, any focus it was given was on the drama it generated with Karkat more than the two actual characters involved in the relationship. But all relationships in Homestuck are handled terribly, Hussie just has no idea how to write them and in his inability he somehow forgets that he can at the very least have the characters talk and do things together.

>>84060193
it's all johns fault
if john wasn't a person terezi/dave would have been LITERAL canon

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>>84060201
>TO BE CONTINUED

>>84060201
Those two days are phrased as separate, the 'and' should show you this.

>>84060222
They still would have broken up

>>84060201
That doesn't mean he kissed Spades Slick, you dumb motherfucker

>>84060201
that's not implying that he had his first kiss with slick, are you actually autistic or just fucking around?

>>84060012
i'd say it's closer to knocknig someone on their ass, then having someone drag them off while another person wearing their clothes who looks similar but not identical walks up and starts pretending to be them

>>84060262
im on to you dogfucker
u cant hide behind anonymous forever

>>84060145
3>4>2>1>5.2>6>5.1

>>84060201
>deliberately implying implications

>>84060171
Act 6 for the most part was okay, but that's definitely where the cracks really started to shine through; all the shit with ghost further trivializing death, Vriska resetting on all the development we had to deal with in act 5, Arenea's bullshit, The Beta's getting shafted development wise, blueballing over the reunion, trivializing the empress & not letting a single living troll interact with her, completely dropping the ball on Jane, completely dropping the ball on the Jane & Jade are evil, VRISKA FIXED IT, etc.

>>84060287
It's true you weirdo. Daverezi is doomed to fail

>>84060222
Just face it man it was never meant to last

considering how terezi is a threesome slut Dave/Jade/Terezi could happen at one point in the epilogue tbqh

im reading the first act 6 intermission now and it makes me sad knowing all these guys died 8(

>>84060338
>terezi getting double stuffed
I can dig it

>>84060326
>>84060297
I WILL NOT BELIEVE YOUR LIES
JUST LIKE SOME GERMANS RESISTED HITLERS CHARMS
I WILL NOT BE HYPNOTIZED

TAKE THIS AS A SIGN PEOPLE
FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS

>>84060338
That would be great

>>84060338
that sounds pretty good

>>84060271
>>84060273
>>84060296
What? Can you explain?

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>>84060338
>>84060360
>>84060380
>>84060382
STOP IT!

>>84060296
Oh for sure, I still can't wrap my head around the huge climax of Act 5 happening, all the huge events and character arcs beginning to reach their critical points and then nothing, we get a slow mirror of the initial acts with some new characters. I would have been fine with them if we'd been eased into them, but fuck me did that disconnect in pacing make me dislike all the Alphas and every stupid thing they did for quite a while. Then when we do eventually get back to the main cast, things were just off, huge developments happening off screen and we just have to go along with it and one interesting characters suddenly end up doing jack shit rip rose. There's so much more I could go into, as you said the cracks were painfully apparent at that point, but damn did the retcon just utterly nuke any redemption for the story in how they went about it.

>>84060420
you don't need terezi when you have reader

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>>84060361
Stop it with this delusional fantasy you have

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>>84060393
that part is just establishing crowbar as having a great memory. he remembers lots of different things, and the panel you posted is him talking about three separate ones

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Is there anyone with Homestuck Vol. 10 that is willing to share it with a poor bloke?

>>84060420
Karkat must be cucked out of all possible relationships at once, otherwise the universe de-stabilizes and gets cancer

>>84060420
When this happens hopefully Karkat will off himself

>>84060452
yeah, check the bandcamp for a cheap download

>>84060393
Statement
>you remember your first kiss.
New statement
>and you remember that fateful night plain as day
New Statement
>the night you met slick

Have you literally never read a comic before on this comic & cartoons board?

>>84060420
>tfw karkat will never be soft-dommed by lalondes

>>84060429
I'm still so fucking butthurt about how the alcoholism thing was handled, what a shitshow.
Like instead of vriskagram we got to actually click the images and read the dialogue like the scratch intermission I would have been more okay with it, since then we can actually see the characters addressing and dealing with shit, but we didn't get squat.
I sincerely don't understand how people can unironically ship davekat because of it.

>>84060452
Give me a second to find my link

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>>84060420

>>84059587
>Amelia
best taste

>>84060296
ranking act 6 on the same footing as the other acts is pretty absurd. its literally half the comic and subdivided 21 times. some of the individual sections like 6.3 or 6.6i2 are god tier fuckin quality as well

>>84060393
The 'and' means the two events are separate, just as the phrasing shows the day he first saw the Midnight City Skyline is separate from the day he had his first kiss, so too does it mean the first time he met Slick is separate from the kiss. Crowbar was just remembering specific meaningful events, he does that.

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>>84060420
That's what you get for inadvertently getting your backup squeeze killed, now no one will put up with your shit.

>>84060451
>>84060486
>>84060512
Fuck

>>84060484
If I could afford it I wouldn't be asking here.
Shameful, I know.

>>84060486
>Give me a second to find my link
Thank you my friend.

>>84060487
>karkat dragging nepeta's headless corpse out of gamzee's fridge so her can fuck it

yikes

>>84060452
https://mega.nz/#F!DlRQ0BJY!2MHUEyMj1WnI6ka1PHHeQg
Enjoy

>>84060510
Thats the problem
There was to much shit happening during whats supposed to be the ending of the comic
For every conversation as good as "I don't want to die Dirk" there were pages and pages and pages of pointless bullshit that amounted to nothing.
Like as much as I enjoy caliborn, seeing explictly how he came into power totally neutered LE as a legitamite threat. Hell jack spent the majority of the comic running from PM but at leas the kids had a reason to want to stop/fight him unlike Lord "why do I even care about some ripped green ghost cleaning house" English

>>84060530
>Never addressed the fact he was directly responsible for abandoning sollux and sending the meowrails to their death against the clown

what happened to eridan's legs

>>84060357
>ROSE: What outcome would you like the most?
>KANAYA: I Would Like To Have The Orb Again And To Keep It Safe This Time
>KANAYA: And I Guess To Not Be A Total Failure

rest in peace

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EASILY my least favorite thing in all of Homestuck, and I think somewhat emblematic of the tone shift that made so much of act 6 shitty, is the change in Dave's attitude towards Bro leading up to the final battle.

In the early acts Bro was shown to be a deranged psychopath and a completely unfit parental figure. But it was FUNNY. It was a JOKE goddammit. Dave's admiration of his creepy bro only made it funnier.

Act 6 revists Dave's childhood but this time takes it all at face value and with no humor at all. Dave's messed up home situation stops being a joke and becomes a big fucking traumatic ordeal.

Basically, Act 6 has us revisit one of the funnier bit from the early acts, only this time wagging its finger and telling us No, This Is Not and Never Was Funny, You Should Not Have Laughed. It buys Dave some emotional pathos by trading away the goofy shit that made him a fun character in the first place.

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>>84060568
thanks, nigga

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>>84060574

How much of a person's body does Jane need to revive them?

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>>84060568
Thank you again, I appreciate it.

>>84060609
Quality shitpost

>>84060609
what was eridans role in the story anyway

>>84060585
Even for a joke you could tell dave dodnt really catr for his home life and was kust putting on a facade. Or you would if you actually read the fucking comic

>>84060585
When was the last time Dave rapped onscreen?
Was it with the Blue Blood?
you also forgot the fact that despite being bro and sis dave just straight up abandoned rose to her drinking problem and practically never interacted with her again.
Like in act 6 I can only recall like 2 conversations in the walkarounds and then the last conversation with roxy at the very end.
After all that buildup and legit intimacy between the two they just stopped.

Fuck this comic man

>>84060606
>that image
See thats the shit I'm talking about, after act 6 started did the beta's have any moments like that between them again?

>>84060664
killing feferi and giving kanaya sue powers

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time for dersecest's version!

>>84060673
Yeah, sure, but the point is that it was funny back then and now its a big sad snorefest

>>84060486
Oh man if it had been handled like that the whole thing could have been so much better. I loved the Doc Scratch scrap book panels, the snappy variety of vastly different situations with different characters was just so in-keeping with what I loved about Homestuck.

Doing that as a way of quickly showing the key events of the 3 year journeys could have been amazing if they were thrown in among the Alphas whole session setup spiel, perhaps having Calliope bring them up or some shit.

Either way, seeing all those characters we cared about changing and dealing with the massive events of the end of Act 5 surely would have gone down swimmingly with the fans. You'd be able to have a variety of different combinations of interactions to help advance character development, like Rose's alcoholism issues getting worse as time went on or the whole Dave, Terezi, Karkat and Gamzee situation and the actual fucking fallout from Karkat getting Equius and Nepeta killed. I wanted Terezi to chew him out so bad over that, or even better to see him hide his involvement and really choke up about it, that way we'd still get to see Karkat's flaws despite his more positive actions towards the end of Act 5. The lowest point of the character arc as such, that'd be a solid motivation right there to try and improve himself genuinely without requiring him to act like a completely different character for seemingly no reason as is the only way davekat works because people selectively forget both their previous characters and antagonistic dynamic.

>>84060673
This.

>>84059681
>dancestors
>Namco High

The dancestors came around when Homestuck was near the height of its popularity, as relevant as it had ever or would ever be.

Namco High had nothing to do with Homestuck.

>>84060585
real talk people not being able to accept that something can be taken both seriously and as a joke at the same time is why i dont fucking go to tumblr. isnt this place supposed to be different. why are we saying the exact same shit with barely a different angle on it. of course youre allowed to laugh at child abuse if its funny you moron. that doesnt make it not child abuse. but it being child abuse doesnt make it not funny either.

>>84060697
Its still funny. Now we just find out it fucked dave up for real.

>>84060684
Why are you still namefagging. Nobody cares anymore now that you hate homestuck as much as the rest of us

>>84060704
see >>84060697

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>>84060568
>Hell jack spent the majority of the comic running from PM
Oh my god that actually happened, that is a thing which happened in the comic. How the fuck did that happen? What the fuck.

>>84060691
This image is extremely disorienting.

>>84060068
I love Tavros as a character and he's a much better person than Karkat is. It's also extremely fucked up how everyone goes 'le weenie' like they don't understand the entire reason he's one is because of Vriska. And even ignoring that, it doesn't justify the HORRIFIC abuse he endured.

Sollux/Feferi >>>>>>>>>> Aradia/Sollux

Calliope had a lot of potential but should have remained a tragic character.

>>84060722
>of course youre allowed to laugh at child abuse if its funny you moron. that doesnt make it not child abuse. but it being child abuse doesnt make it not funny either.
no shit child abuse is hilarious
but it has to be delivered in a comedic way, which it was at first, and then it was not

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>>84060764
:0

>>84060758
Its still funny. Horrible psychologicaly damaging but funny

>>84060664
He should have been a secondary character used to develop the main cast, but he and the other minor trolls were never used effectively to do that. Instead they had their own pointless little drama filled stories with each other then died. Eridan at least created some interesting drama, retarded as the whole thing was.

>>84060778
The boxers are random as hell, the color scheme isn't Rose's, and Dave is a Knight of Time, not a Knight of Breath.

>>84060772
arasol isnt canon. Arajohn is

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>>84060068
Joey should NEVER wear shoes

>>84060684
i didnt FORGET idiot i was just making a completely different point

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All I want out of life is for more things like 'Homestuck According to Mom'

>>84060804
what if she's stepping on a rocky area or asphalt in the summer

>>84060804
>>84060068
Joey has a four-headed penis like an echidna and the foreskin on all four heads retracts and and slides back over them rapidly to the beat of the miniboss music from Kirby 64: The Crystal Shards.

>>84060799
it's the kid fusion created by the house juju that defeats lord english

>>84060823
if she wants me to buy her shitty game she better toughen the fuck up!

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>>84060585
Remember when this was how Dave broke out of Bro's shadow, and began to understand just how fucked up his life was?

By getting molested by a pile of puppets after a Saw parody, then flipping his shit about porn puppets being all up in his face.

That has always struck me the singularly most competent and tonally consistent example of telling a character arc through the language of comedy in anything. As in all media I've ever seen, save for maybe Howard Beale depending on how much you want to attribute to the dark comedy aspects of Network.

Then we got that.

Then we get that.

>>84060144
because terezi is fuckin obnoxious as shit

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>>84060821
>she loves to party

>>84060846
What does Dersecest have to do with that?

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>>84060821
>something a bit weird about him
I'm telling you, if Hussie made Vriska a guy he'd have like a billion fangirls

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>>84060821

>more unironic bro wasnt an abuser posters

Can we just do unironic gender/sexuality discussion? Trans lesbian rose here

>>84060864
man look at that outfit
dave used to be a huge dork
then he unironically became a brooding hero stereotype

>>84060922
He is still a huge dork

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>>84060900
>tfw your mom would never ship roxygen

>>84060903
no one's saying bro wasn't an abuser
just that hussie made it unfunny with cringe-tier melodrama

>>84060821
>shes got the power
>theres not a lot else you can say
Fucking magical.

Also that fucking spot on interpretation of Dirk is impressive.

>>84060931
no he's not
he's the fangirls' sexy favorite

>>84060945
1 its still funny
B. Ive seen people claim that

>>84060776
i thought dave and dirks conversation did a great job of cycling hard between funny and horrible in a way that no one dares to do as hard as homestuck, for fear of hurting peoples feelings. defending parts of that intermission leaves a bad taste in my mouth though

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>>84060939
Why not?

>>84060980
way too mainstream

>>84060973
>no one dares to do as hard as homestuck
no one does that because it's tonally jarring, not because they're afraid to inject cheap drama into their shitty young adult novel

>>84060965
well youre the first to say it in this thread so looks like you're the fuckup here

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>>84060980
filthy Johnrezi AND IT'S RED

>>84060980
because she's shipped John/Rose from day one and refuses to change her ways

>>84061014
tonally jarring = funny if done well. homestuck did it well pretty often in act 5

Ive hated homestuck since 4/10/2009. What do i win

>>84061039
At least its better than nothing - Inafune

>>84061014
"jarring" tone shifts are a SOURCE OF POTENTIAL COMEDY YOU FUCK

>>84060980
Because she's dead, anon.

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I know I'm in the minority but I actually enjoyed the conversation between Dirk and Dave right before Collide. Dave finding out that his alternate self achieved the greatness he deserved was really touching.

I wish we knew more about Alpha Dave's life.

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feferi is a cuck

>>84061058
davekat smutfics

Remember when Terezi shanked Vriska and the universe itself was like "Yeah totally justified m8"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CaafnkSVcdU

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>>84059702
>Snowman has blue blood while the kids' queen had red blood

Snowman was genetically altered by Doc to be synonymous with the trolls Alternian universe, that's why she has the blue blood. When the trolls were playing their regular session with BQ pre-exile she would have had standard red blood, I think.

>I cantsee slick or the kids' Jack accepting candy as a payment.

MC has always loved candy, they all had a themed piece that they considered extremely valuable (scottie dogs, swedish fish, wax lips, gummy bears)

>>84061057
>>84061064
you can't seriously be trying to convince me that "metal sounds give me ptsd" was supposed to be comedic
if that's the case then hussie totally failed
I think you two might be the only people in the entire fanbase who laughed

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>>84061046
Good taste

>>84061058
MY FU1CKG D1GK

>>84061098
neither of us mentioned that scene or any specific scene at all, fuck you

>>84061098
it was comedic
come on, "metal sounds"? lol

>>84061076
It took him a long time to start liking it, was it rape?

>>84061095
oh god remember that avatar hussie had ahahahahha

>>84061165
nope! Only some concern over fucking a moirail

>>84061137
it's all one scene man
it's one big long dave rant about how bro was a horrible person who could have only "felt some kind of loathing toward him"
where's the funny
I can't see it

>>84060772
>Tavros shit
Agree. For my own dumb opinion:

Eridan is a sympathetic character. He was kind of an asshole but he clearly had motivations to improve himself until all of his friends abandoned him. The story treats it as his fault for driving everyone away and everyone is super justified for keeping their distance, but if Eridan didn't feel like a total outcast in his own group he would've never tried to turncoat and side with Jack Noir. He's pretty much a school shooter.

>>84061095
>that kawaii hussie avatar
what in the

>>84061204
>He's pretty much a school shooter.
But he isnt white

>>84061165
her bra hook was stuck

>>84061140
>tfw I have weird sensory issues and feel actual pain in my gums from metal scraping sounds
There is nothing comedic about it

>>84061199
I think you have me confused with someone who DOESNT hate the act 6 bro/dave melodrama.

I was only pointing out that tonal shifts CAN be a source of comedy. This one on the other hand, along with other similar ones, basically ruined Act 6 for me.

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Land of Windmills and Citrus

Yes, magical trees which grow oranges, lemons, limes and grapefruit all at once. Because fuck biology.

>>84061255
then listen to THIS
-scratches metal fork on bare plate-

>>84061287
sweating migrant worker.jpg

>>84061095
>Lord English(Whoever he is)
>Oh look a misogynistic pattern oooooooooooooooo I wonder who he is~
>Just ends up being Caliborn

>>84061204
He may be sympathetic, but it is his fault for driving everyone away, given he's an insufferable arsehole. It's also one thing to have motivations to better oneself, but doing nothing to achieve those goals and still acting like an arsehole doesn't excuse you. He made his own problems and could have worked towards solving them at any time had he showed commitment to dropping the terrible parts of his personality, but he never does and is rightly outcast.

>>84060821
Here dude
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vr42y_9Bo8s

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>>84061287
Give me the fucking citrus

>>84061285
well I can acknowledge that, sorry about the misunderstanding

it doesn't really ever go the other way around though, like you never see abrupt tonal shifts used for drama instead of comedy. I think it could be effective in a jump scare sense but it probably doesn't have a lot of cathartic value

>>84061287
Man that'd be a real pretty land, though I can't imagine it'd have the most interesting quests, good stuff.

>>84061366
Land of Windmills and Citrus
Your land is a fruity, orange and yellow field of many citrus fruits, mostly oranges and lemons, but also limes, grapefruits, etc. that your consorts, the Orioles, constantly harvest and consume, with grand wooden windmills dotting the landscape, powering nothing. Your denizen, Persephone, has cut off the rivers from the windmills, turning the water stagnant and sickening, poisoning the citrus supply - you must reset the windmills to get the rivers flowing again, and only then, will the Orioles reveal the entrance to Persephone's lair.

>>84061326
>just ends up being caliborn
And a dirk and equius. And half of gamzee

>>84061354
>you never see abrupt tonal shifts used for drama instead of comedy
Yes you do.

>>84061326
no he wound up being caliborn, dirk, equius and 1/2 of gamzee

which was an awful twist

>>84061385
>equius

Just realised the pottery of LE enslaving both the lowest and the highest of the bloodcaste.

>>84061410
like what for example

>>84061335
This.

It's basically the difference between Eridan and Equius: they started from the same place but one tried to be a better troll while the other one didn't.

Of course, neither went anywhere because that's Hackdrew Pussie for ya.

>>84061354
WV: ascend is an example of a tonal shift being used for drama excellently. suddenly the funny joke character who doesnt like kings for some reason gets a dramatic backstory and you have to reassess all the funny mayor shit in a new and darker context.

>>84061366
>>84061382
I was about to say "The water's fucked", but the description works far better.

>>84061385
yeah but not really like in a cool way

What the fuck is homestuck

>>84061449
*WV: rise up

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>>84061442

>>84061467
A massive waste of time and a burden on the lives of all of its fans.

i miss wv

>>84061493
Who?

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>>84061287
That's actually feasible though. You have to graft them, but most citrus trees will bear fruit bearing limbs of other trees.

That's how you get apple strains instead of the shitty crabapple trees that most apple seeds spawn.

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>>84059556
Honestly a lot of the ideas could've been fine and even brilliant if the payoffs were executed better. As it is, I'd go with overly indulging in romance shenanigans, as I believe that's the main portion of the excess fat.

>>84061449
I was thinking more like tragedy but I guess that's technically drama

>>84061447
Yeah, it would have been a nice touch to see the Equius we know in the dream bubbles apologize to Nepeta for inadvertently getting her killed, due to his issues with submissiveness and the hemospectrum and promising to work on bettering himself as a result of it getting Nepeta harmed. But no, one conversation is too much to conclude Equius' character arc in some meaningful manner.

>>84061517
Well yeah, you can do a lot more than that with some root stocks, but there'd be little point doing that on every tree across an area that large.

So they're magical trees instead for some reason. Blame ectobiology or something I guess.

>>84061447
>Hackdrew Pussie

oh this one's good

>>84061522
Love the file name.
>Dave hides his face in shame.
>Rose states at her empty hands.

>>84061493
vwhy do you miss me? i nevwer left.

>>84061287
Requester here, you continue to outdo yourself. Thank you so much, it looks wonderful.

Strolling endlessly through breezy orchards; somehow Classpectanon managed to figure out what my personal heaven would be.

>>84061537
We got that during the trickster arc

OFFICIAL
-OFFICIAL-
VILLIAN TIER LIST

>top
Bec Noir

>mid
Condy
Snowman
The Felt

>okay
Hivebent Vriska
Guy Fieri
Gamzee

>shit
LE
The other Jacks
Droog
Aranea

>>84061517
aradia looks weird...

>>84061474
that's not an abrupt shift
the sad guitar music even starts coming in before the reveal is made

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>>84059556
Most things from Act 6 onwards.

The more Hussie tried to "play" with conventions the more he failed, he should've just made a conventional story, the setting and characters were original enough.

Pic related, another series that went to shit because it tried to be "different".

>>84061581
Switch Gamzee and Aranea and then we're good.

>>84061568
:)

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>>84061107
I'd like to win a Mituna

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>>84061581
>shit
>The other jacks
>Droog
I hope you mean they don't serve the story well as villains, and not that they're villains who are shit in general

>>84061581
>Fieri not High Chaplan teir
I want a revote

>>84061474
man fuck this episode

>>84061532
jack killing mom and dad was played for laughs and tragedy without really skimping on either

>>84061614
>kh
>shit
Ddd was dope and khux is fun

>>84061651
He is low because he never took anyone to flavor tow

>>84061650
that is what i meant though

not union jack though
Union jack was shit.

>>84061581
>slick
>shit

>hussie
>not listed

>>84061581
>Droog
No taste confirmed. Droog a best.

>>84061698
But anon
he took my heart

>>84061660
I think that was supposed to comic relief
it was designed to mitigate sad feelings not enhance them

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>>84061702
Fair enough. I sort of liked Union Jack, save for the fact that him existing cut the jack jailbreak minor plot short.

>>84061713
Offscreen. Then he lost to a grown up lightbulb who immediately fucked her brother

>>84061666
>khux is fun
no

>>84061570
I'd disagree, but I can see the notion was at least touched on, just in a really poor manner.

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HOW DO I

>>84061581
it bothers me to see LE so low

it bothered me more to realize it's complete true

>>84061608
How abrupt does abrupt have to be for you?
But fine, there are other examples. I just can't remember any at the moment.

>>84061743
You say this like its a bad thing
>>84061737
The worst part about Union Jack is that I always immediately think over the awful 9000 joke done for ~irony~

>no fic au where all the women are hardcore lesbians
>John goes on an impregnation rape rampage
>is read like a horror story
>Roxy is the protagonist

Lol? I thought this was a CREATIVE fandom.

>>84061771
so which old crappy movie did you want to see parodied in homestuck

>>84061773
Well it's not just that
The conversation immediately preceding the reveal could barely be called lighthearted
They were talking to each other seriously

>>84061812
Great idea.

>>84061771
>Imagine a happy ending to HS
>Imagine John finally hugging his Dad again while this music plays in the background
>never ever

>>84061812
I think I played a game of parasite like that once

>>84061812
So what roxy kills john at the end before its revealed that she too is pregnant. Who would she even be in lesbians with

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>>84061860
>sincerely asking

>>84061860
jane

>>84061860
janey

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its so cold 0n0

>>84061860
Jane or Calliope I guess.

>>84061802
>makes joke about having over 9000 pages
>actually has under 9000 pages
homestuck is quality media

>>84061900
Holy shit

>>84061889
Put some socks on then, bitch.

>>84061883
Oh did rose finally manage to cook the hotpocket? And how did kanaya get her pregnant neither has penises.and they are different species. Did they transportalize a fetus into rose

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>>84061771
>heard the original version sung by some lady for the first time in my life last week
>nearly crashed my car from laughing too hard and turning up the radio to blast it

>>84061889
of course it is aradia,
you arent wearing socks
for your horns!

>2009 was 7 years ago

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>>84060821
>smart but depressed
>forever looking for a boyfriend

>>84061883
What is the source for this. I need it for reasons

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People keep saying there's a page where Jade explicitly tells someone that she intends to have kids of her own some day. I thought I remember them saying she talked to Kanaya about it, but I checked through as many of their chatlogs as I could and never found it.

Would anyone mind posting a link if they have it?

>>84061989
It was her wondering who her kids dad would be back when she thought jake was her grandson from the future

>epilogue happens
>mainly focuses on John and Roxy's growing relationship
>they hook up toghether, get married, everyone cheers them
>Roxy eventually gets pregnant, John wears the fedora, becomes the dad
>fast forward to babby being born, John stares into his child and wife as he pulls something from his pocket. everyone is suspicious
>it's a toy bunny
>HOWDOILIVEWITHOUTYOU.MP4
>karkat commits suicide, epilogue ends
how do you react?

>>84062033
WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED TO JACK

>>84062033
Id think homestuck totally redeemed itself

>>84062033
tears of joy

>>84061942
Was it twanging into your soul?

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>>84062033

>>84061508
The Mayor, aka the adopted son of Dave and Karkat.

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It's feeding time.

>>84062033
"how did lord english die"

>>84062051
He got stuck in the bunny.

>>84061958
>Jailbreak was 10 years ago
>A decade of pumpkin jokes
>A decade of quickly retrieving arms
>A decade of commiting suicide at a stump

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>>84062102
>dem hips
God damn

>>84062109
Gay singularity

>>84062109
this is NOT happening in the epilogue and youd best fucking accept that fact for your sanity. english is done

>>84062138
I don't need to see it I just want to know

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are we still doing fantrolls

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>>84059556
Having God Mode Feferi use a crazy-helpful spell on the Mayor from a dream bubble, and then never mentioning it again nor using dreambubbles during the fights with Condesce and Jack.

I would mention Dirk's immature reaction to finding his friends high and magically insane, but his resisting the juju entirely and re-obtaining his unbreakable sword were such great highlights I'm willing to forget it.

And the worst line of dialogue: You kissed my boyfriend. Prepare to die.

>>84062121
Stop shipping incest. Or at least shit some for the prospit kids too

>>84062165
MUH
DICK

what's the difference between Crowbar and DD

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>>84062165
did somebody say fish

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>>84062165
Dayum she's a qt.

>>84062186
prospit kids don't have the issues that make incest shipping good

>>84062164
you can already work it out with whats in the comic, and its been discussed to death here. it never being shown was the only issue.

>>84062207
Hat, colour of suit, ability to not get killed by Slick.

>>84062165
How does she die?
Or are you a multiple-heiress believer?

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>>84062186
If you've got john/jade man I'm all over it
besides I'm also a polyshipper on top of lalondecest & dersecest

>>84062186
>but now jade says i have to finish quickly! she wants me to throw this bucket and its heartfelt payload through her mysterious portal.

>>84062258
>polyshipper
Skum. You are skum

>>84062238
no we can't work it out because all we have right now is a theory based on vague symbolism without any actual evidence

>>84062165
Make her lift her dress up

>>84062243
she and the other existing heiress in her timeframe probably wind up killing each other vying for their own power before the Condesce winds up getting to them

>>84062258
>>84062282

>polyshipping

Looks like I came back to hst just in time

>>84062282
>they don't want the kids to be happy and sexy together
Loving
Every
laugh

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>>84062228
The Prospits have some of the same issues, they're just more lowkey.

>>84062258
>polyshipper
You're a good person.

>>84061287
Looks like a peaceful land.

Fuck wishy washy cant make ip their mind polyshippers

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>>84062186
Are you satisfied?

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>>84062258
Here's my favorite sfw one.
And anything with Terezi is a-okay with me.

>>84062186
Hey fuck you!

>>84062186
You can commision your own comic then anon, just so you know when angel finishes I'm going to get another one
Rose and Roxy are gonna fuck Dave stupid and you can't stop it

>>84062315
One person in 1 relationship only. No 3 ways either

>>84062317
are you retarded?

>>84062326
>not wanting to cram everyone that makes your dick hard into the one scenario and see them all fucking at the same time

i made up my mind, i chose "all of the above". what do you have against communal pleasure?

So is current John a fedora tipping neckbeard without the neckbeard.

wait a minuteeeeeeeeeee
the trolls dont have a concept of incest
hmmm...

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>>84062207
Their height and species

>>84062363
The communal part>>84062363

>>84062285
>for better or worse, the author has explicitly stated his story is meant to be a puzzle!
>theres a lot of clues and they all add up to one answer!
>but we dont see it on screen or get it explicitly confirmed so its just a theory lol!

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>>84062329
Rrrrgh. I wanna like this so bad, but after seeing how badly written and OOC John and Jade are in this comic, I can hardly stand to look at the art.

It's very appealing art though. Shame.

>>84062412
Any JohnJade comic would be OOC, John beats up autistic children for shipping incest.

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>>84062326
tfw polyshipping irl

>>84059794
>B-list
he's D-list at best

>>84062371
The harleybert bloodline is currently the only bloodline in the existance to be able to pull off a fedora in this current time

and mind you, an actual fedora. None of that trilby bullshit

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>>84062305
This guy gets it
>>84062317
I legit enjoy John & jades dynamic as more open but lowkey sarcasm and antagonism. There could be lots of cute/flirty shit
>>84062334
That is super cute
>>84062348
God damn
>>84062350
>he doesn't want to see rose and kanaya seduce jane
>he doesn't want roxy and jade to double team jade
>doesn't want to see John knocking up rose while kanaya plays with both
I'm smhtbhfam

>>84062410
you know else practiced conjecture using symbolism as evidence? BKEW
this is an indignity that I will not tolerate
a mystery isn't complete until the detective announces who the killer was

>>84062460
>straight kanaya

gross

>>84059556
Why did Hussie feel the need to bring in 12 new characters for the sole purpose of only using two of them really when he could of just tried to make Feferi matter instead?

>>84062494
>implying kanaya wouldn't be an open and supportive lover
You take it back

>>84062510
He's a hack.

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>>84062412
You can have them do something they wouldn't consider doing in the story, yet still retain major aspects of their personality. If Davesprite was never there, they could always have the conversation that they never really grew up together, so it's not THAT strange - just not something they'd tell their friends.

John and Jade are very enthusiastic characters. Writing them in a way that makes their interactions somber and serious just seems so wrong.

>>84062460
No one person for 1 other person. If its trolls and quadrenfs thats fine but no everygirl with everygirl with dave and or john. One person per person per quadrent

>>84062460
nah kanaya wouldn't even get in on the johnrose action, she'd just be sitting in a stool watching with close attention while occasionally saying something

>>84062462
this is the most fucking autistic viewpoint. use your fucking brain and trust the answers it gives you, idiot

>>84060900
>john got every single girl pregnant
sounds about right

>>84062511
>implying she would let rose get with anyone with a smaller penis than her

>>84062530
FUCK

meant to send that to >>84062436

>>84062410
>, the author has explicitly stated his story is meant to be a puzzle!
No he hasn't.

>theres a lot of clues and they all add up to one answer!
No they don't. Everything theory put forward has glaring flaws. Assuming you're referring to the kids escaping the story, they manage to just fucking enter it again through the Masterpiece, despite the fact that it doesn't actually exist within the story. And even then, that still leaves the kids trapped in the Juju and no explanation as to how that kills English.

>but we dont see it on screen or get it explicitly confirmed so its just a theory lol!
we don't have anything even properly implied, let alone confirmed.

>>84062454
I meant personality-wise.

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>>84062511
Haven't been to these threads for around a month and a half now. Why do you still have a name?

>>84062548
my brain tells me that there's no way English could be killed by a black hole because we've already seen two characters survive them, and they weren't even immortal

>>84062575
Because she is a drunk attention whore who uses us to make up for mommy never showing her love

>>84062575
attention

>>84062561
We're not bringing that back, you piece of shit. Now let's never talk about this again.

John and Jade having a pregnancy contest

>>84062567
oh.

well he is a defender of women™ and he's nice to everyone but he doesn't just do it because he wants to bang. He's just a nice guy but also a doofus that prefers to be told what to do

>>84062596
Its a big thing to not talk about

>>84062510
The guy somehow forgot how to write secondary characters, despite doing it just fine earlier in the comic.

>>84062597
John, missing the point and the rules, going overboard and impregnating every Lalonde

All I want is a chubby weeaboo girlfriend to wait for the epilogue with.

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>>84062532
>being this boring

>>84062538
>>84062561
>hating fun

MITUNA: G375 4D0WN 7H3R3 5LU7
MITUNA: ((mituna pulls out his dick again

>>84062566
http://homestuck-arts.tumblr.com/post/142725639147/the-thing-is-homestuck-is-both-a-story-and-a

yes, he has said the story is a puzzle. he said it exactly as pretentiously as you might imagine him to have said it

>>84062597
Can't it be Jade and Roxy
Them interacting together would be cute, they have so many common things

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>>84062589
>>84062590
Guess this place hasn't changed then.

>>84062694
this guy talks like he invented adventure games/mystery novels

>>84060146
It's alright fellow Daverezi friend, I'm 100% with you. Daverezi and Daverose are the patrician Dave ships. Not saying Davejade is bad, but c'mon.

>it wouldn't have worked out between him and the character he had the best banter with, who helped him create SBaHJ!

Yeah, alright, you fucking philistines.

>tfw every Daverezi shipper either went back to Daverose or went on to Davekat

Fuck this fucking stupid fandom.

>>84062702
>Roxy will never train jade how to wavedash as fox

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>>84062694
well lads it seems like the next step for hussie is to go on a long rant about how we're all goats for not "getting" homestuck

>>84062510
Her quirk was REALLY annoying to type

>>84062754
thank you

>>84062754
i dunno, i mean, terezi and dave kinda had the same hangups with keeping a lot of emotional insecurity hidden behind a facade, they might banter with each other well, but as a relationship they might not work

>>84062771
is this an umineko thing
I stopped reading after episode 5

>>84062530
>john looks more feminine than jade

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>>84060146
>>84062754
Johnrezi blackrom is superior and has been so ever since she killed him that one time

>>84062754
as a fellow Davejade shipper, I can tell you that daverezi is still a patrician ship, and had some of the best pesterlogs as well

>>84062694
Yeah, *five years ago* maybe he knew where he was going with the puzzle stuff.