What does Batman eat?

>>77785737
Nachos.

>>77785737
nachos?
hotdogs?

>>77785737
He's mainly an insectivore, just like his namesake.

>>77785737
Cheetos

>>77785737
Whatever Alfred makes and shoves at him

>>77785784
there are frugivore bats

>>77785773
>>77785783
BATMAN DOES NOT EAT NACHOS

>>77785737
Nachos

Vichyssoise.

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>>77785773
>>77785783
BATMAN DOES NOT EAT NACHOS

justice

>>77785737
Fruit, insects, blood.

>>77785737
Superman's dick.

Didn't we figure out he ate nachos the other day? or he tries to eat nachos but crime always interrupts

>>77785737
Vengeance

>>77785737
I'm not trying to be that guy who tries to knock Bruce down a peg out of some weird spite for a fictional character, usually due to popularity over a character said guy likes more, but truth be told Alfred usually does bring him weird kid shit for some reason. I guess maybe that's sort of meant to be an actual insight into his mentality behind the mask when he just wants to be normal again, as normal as Bruce can be therefore childhood Bruce not adult Bruce who had nothing normal to go off, but it's still kind of weird.

I think he brought him white chocolate chip cookies and milk once. I mean, just what the hell. Of course an alternative to a Dr.Phil panel it might just be played for laughs to show Alfred doesn't take all his duties seriously or just like ribbing Bruce who can't really do much about it.

>>77785737
Alfred makes some bomb ass nachos like dam tho

Dead parents

>>77785737
Parent repellent spray

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>>77785810
crime fighting requires lots of protein. That's why you can't have fruitbatman.

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BatNachos
Batman loves Nachos for some reason

>>77785737
Batgirl pussy

>>77785876
>truth be told Alfred usually does bring him weird kid shit for some reason

>that one issue of Injustice where Alfred brings a sad Batman a plate of mac and cheese

>>77785876
Theres been a few times now that you mention it where Alfred has made him chicken noodle soup
usually cause he's sick or whatever reason from being out in the cold all the time

>>77786004
Dini and Timm pls go

>>77785737
Harley Quinn's cock.

>>77786021
I am 32 years old and will eat the shit out of a good plate of mac&cheese. There are some things that you are never too old for.

Whatever Alfred orders him to eat because if he doesn't eat something he isn't allowed to go out on patrol.

Remember, Batman went 2 whole weeks without food or rest and Alfred had to restrain him with how obsessive he was over his job.

>>77785737
Soylent and whatever they serve at high class charity functions.

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>>77786059
Well of course Alfred has made him soup because Bruce can't do it.

Hopefully Alfred at least taught Dick and the others better.

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>>77786126
>Remember, Batman went 2 whole weeks without food or rest and Alfred had to restrain him with how obsessive he was over his job.

GOMAD

Selina Kyle.

>>77785737
Pussy Leaves and Cream Pies

>>77785820
came here to post this

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Only one person has said JUSTICE?

Shame on you, /co/.

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BATMILK AND COOKIES FOR EVERYONE

Batmilk..?

>>77786735
He eats crime
he shits justice
he also likes nachos

>>77785737
Probably a balance of carbs and protein, spread through out the day. Carbs for energy, protein for maintaining muscle. Probably something like;

Early morning snack if needed

7 am - half of a six egg white omelette, with ham, spinach, tomatoes and cheese, and four slices of whole wheat toast. Green tea to drink.

9 am - finish omelette, eat some mixed fruit

11 am - protein bar and creatine tablet

1 pm - grilled chicken with Brown rice and maybe some veggies

4 pm - handful of almonds and some raisins or cranberries

6 pm - a lean dinner of fish/steak/chicken with more Brown rice and more veggies

8 pm - whey protein shake and creatine

11 pm - small casein protein shake

Late night snack during crime fighting if needed

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>>77785737
Steak
Well Done

>>77785737
According to Beware the Batman, Bruce has Alfred prepare protein shakes and smoothies. He only eats solid foods when out in public to keep up appearances.

>>77786985
>Well-done
Bruce is literally a psychopath

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>>77787042
>gravy
>egg
>steak sauce
>sausage?
I've had enough of Batman's shit.

>>77785737

Justice.

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Just Ice

>>77785876
>adults don't like cookies
Like I would agree if you said he brought him cartoon shaped mac and cheese but everyone loves cookies

No ones posted the catman burrito page yet? I'm dissapointed in you, /co/. If I still had my old harddrive I'd beat you all to the punch instead of shakin mah head.

>>77787641
You can't be giving Vengeance, the Night, Justice cookies and milk unless your name is Alfred Pennyworth.

>>77787763
I hope he went and bought it while in the batsuit

>>77787899
Haha, that's actually really cute.

>>77785737
food. he gets enough exercise he needs a LOT of food and it doesn't much matte what it is as long as it eventually includes everything

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>>77786112
>Batman sucking Harley's girl-cock.
Oh god, don't do this to me, Anon. I don't want to fap.

>>77786900
oh yeah i'm sure he has all the time in the world for that regimen.
>alfred, have you loaded my eight meals into the batmobile?
>yes s-
>and have you loaded another eight into the batwing so it can airlift them to me if I'm too far from the batmobile?
>sir, do you think that's the best use of jet fuel? It's very expe-
>Can't talk now, alfred, I need to finish up this protein bar so I can get to my chicken. you DID finish the chicken, right?

>>77787143
*Batman-tier workout not pictured

>>77788161
Imagine he's on patrol hiding in a warehouse listening in on a conversation and his high protein diet makes him squeeze out a really loud and long fart

>>77788192
Do Batmans even fart?

>>77787845
>rumor gets around that if you say "we couldn't possibly charge you, it's on me" you get paid double

>>77788192
Imagine being a mook and hearing a loud fart a little off in the distance

>>77788192
eh, i think your enzymes adapt. just like they adapt to mid-tier polysaccharides like those found in beans.. however no amount of acclimitization will let you digest cellulose without passing it along to your gut flora, and those are the little gas factories.
>yfw batman holds in his farts on stealth missions and the methane starts coming out of his pores. that happens you know. batman smells. stephanie probably did lay an egg once a month

>>77788219
I could see Batman developing special sound-dampening anti-fart fabric just to squeeze out that extra bit of stealth. He's portrayed as paranoid enough, sometimes.

>>77788268
>it sounds like a Kevin Conroy grunt

>>77788376
When will a writer address this important topic?

>>77788087
You know you have to do it, anon.
Every moment Harley has been nice to Bruce has just been to get him close enough for her to stick her cock in his mouth and facefuck him.

>>77787042
What the fuck are squeezy cheesy fries?

>>77788515
You squeeze them and they turn into cheese.

>>77788515
fries squirted with cheese sauce
presumably this sauce is contained inside a squeeze bottle, or even an aerosol can

>>77787845
>>77788223
That's Dick, not Bruce. Not only would Dick get a burrito in the Batsuit, he'd probably stop and let some people grab a few selfies with him.

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>>77788492

>>77788563
It is Bruce.

>>77788451
>Greetings Detective, I see you uncovered my schemes and came racing to foil them. Unfortunately your interference was accounted for and...
>*ppppffffrrrrrrrttttt*
>Oh dear god, man, what the...open a window, someone open a window.

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>>77786126
>>77786202
I can normally suspend disbelief over shit like this but that's just ridiculous.

>>77788192
>Was that the freakin' bat?

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>>77786021
He's got some green stuff too

>>77788853
I Fucking love mac and cheese

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>>77788888
MAC AND CHEEEESE

>>77788888
Everybody does

>>77788853
>trains his body obsessively to peak condition
>doesn't care about nutrition
I guess an argument could be made for him conditioning himself to live without proper food, but still

>>77788161
Well, he COULD keep a bunch of meals in the batmobile or have restaurants that have meals ready
But I really want to see batman stopping and pulling out a lean cuisine out of his bat mobile

>>77785784
Aren't bats just big bugs?

>>77788853
Why is bearded hobo Batman so adorable?

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>>77789121

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>>77787564
underrated post, did read in his voice

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>>77788853
>Alfred is basically Bruce's father
>Brings him comfort food like mac and cheese and cookies when he's sad

This is a strong feel

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SUPERMAN

>>77789121
They're mammals.

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>>77789205
He eats Superman with his butt.

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Whatever he can stuff his face with

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>>77789205
>>77789243
>stare at these for a couple seconds before realizing these are not official comics, but in fact gay porn
I've been here too long

>>77788888
>>77788906
>>77788994

>tfw BBQ place down the street from me has God tier mac&cheese
>they call it mac&cheddar
>they put bacon in it

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>>77789338
The artist is good at looking like Capullo's stuff

>>77789338
To be fair, that porn artist mimics Greg Capullo's style.

>>77789350
>>77788994
>>77788906
>>77788888
Have ya'll niggas ever had a hot dog with mac and cheese on it?
It sounds awful
But I can assure you, it is not

>>77789392
Might as well throw some chili on it too

>>77789392
Same deal with grilled cheese with jelly. It sounds disgusting, but it's actually fucking delicious.

>>77789204
Alfred is Bruce's maternal figure, Gordon is his father figure.

>>77789367
What if it actually is Capullo doing it for shits and giggles?

>>77789392
with tangy bbq sauce on top is a plus

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>>77789439
Alfred is also Dick's mom

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>>77789439
>What if it actually is Capullo doing it for shits and giggles?
I can see it

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>>77789439
Yeah, "shits and giggles"

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>>77787010
Wouldn't that make his jaw weak or something? Not very bright, Bruce.

>>77788888
checked

>>77787010
Not just that, but that orange drink he had was actually solid foods blended into a drink.

Unicorn eggs and gold flaked nachos.
He can afford the good stuff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIGgGV7uwU4

>>77787010
Literally why

>>77788578
Harley Quinn buttfucking anon dressed as Batman

>>77790363
Linkara?

>>77790526
Linkara is a sin.

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>>77786194
There was an issue where Alfred brougt Batman a cold soup, Gazpacho I think it was. Otherwise he drinks protein shakes that basically fuel him.

>>77785737
Whatever the fuck Alfred makes, Alfred doesn't take lip.

>>77790279
Apparently to save time and effort.

>>77786112

Harley is a woman, so she wouldn't have a cock

>>77790780
Is this your first day here?

>>77790780
Hey bro, here are some boards I think you might like.
>>>/d/
>>>/aco/

Come back and tell me what you think.

>>77790679
Living on nothing but protein shakes seems horrible

>>77788161
This is a problem in high-intensity military lifestyles, yes. Batman's probably really into MRIs.

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>>77789121

>>77790973
Solid stool is for lesser people.

>>77791022
There it is! I guess that's tea or something though.

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>>77788888
Quints confirm

>>77791210
It would only make getting to his backup lockpicks harder.

I am more curious about what happens if he should come down with a bad case of the shits during a night patrol? Does he have special porto potties strewn across the rooftops of Gotham for his use?

>>77785737
More importantly, who eats Batman?

>>77791340

According to the food web, humans.

>>77791389
When's the last time you ate a bat?

>>77789392
>hot dog with mac an cheese on it
>not mac and cheese with cut up hot dog in it
I'm not even Canadian and I find this superior

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>>77791340
The Owls

Being ~ 6'3"
~250 lbs
And having a strenuous/physical lifestyle...

Batman's daily caloric intake would be about 4,000+. That's if he wants to maintain his muscle mass. Lots of protein for sure.

Plus, he's incredibly rich. I'm sure it's the best, top-shelf gourmet.

>>77789204

I love Bruce and Alfred relationship.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVTqaJjNH7M

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=12tXSJp1TGY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5meg74IhGAI

>>77785737
Chicken soup is canon.

>>77789308

sauce, i want to have this pic forever

>>77791336
I would guess he wears bat-diapers. Not like you can afford to take a potty break when some guy is getting killed.

>>77785737
Bat Tacos

He drinks a blend of pure supplements. Enough to keep him in peek physical condition.

>>77785737
Justice.

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>>77785737
Ba-na-na!

>>77791336
Revolutionary in-suit plumbing design developed by Wayne Aerospace.

>>77791336

Write a story about a man who starts using Batman's secret porto potties. Enemies think it's Batman's secret identity and come after schlub.

>>77785737
Pussy.
Bruce has fucked pretty much everyone

>>77787899
best catwoman

>>77787899
Why is Catwoman so adorable?

>>77787031
Sounds more like trust issues to me, as in not trusting that restaurant to serve good steak.

>>77792049
Yeah I do this, another guy I knew says diced ham is good if not better.

>>77794821
Well they certainly aren't going to give him a good one now

>>77789308
>that one anon

ruined floats for me forever

>>77787010
Don't forget he also messed with hormone-free bovine glands to limit his amount of sleep.

Dude's self-destructive.

>>77785737

Ortolan

>For centuries, a rite of passage for French gourmets was the eating of the Ortolan. These tiny birds—captured alive, force-fed, then drowned in Armagnac—were roasted whole and eaten that way, bones and all, while the diner draped his head with a linen napkin to preserve the precious aromas and, some believe, to hide from God.

>>77785737
Punks and criminal scum.

>>77795495
Mac and cheese can actually be a fantastic dinner if you get some decent ham mixed in with some of the bigger macaroni noodles, various cheeses, and breadcrumbs. Bacon is good too.