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If you were forced to have one as a dad, who would you choose?

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If you were forced to have one as a dad, who would you choose?
>>
Jerry. He's a selfish coward but he's not outright abusive like the other two.
>>
Morty's dad is the least batshit of the three, he's just kind of pathetic.
>>
Clay, because it would fuck me up in the best possible way.
>>
>>77619595

Gotta go with this.
>>
>>77619621
have fun being a cripple for the rest of your life
>>
This would've been much harder had you left out Jerry
>>
Yeah, I've never watched Morel Orel, but I'd say Jerry is the easy choice. Everyone just walks all over him.
>>
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>>77619595
This
>>
Jerry.
He's just kind of really sad. The worst thing he's done to Morty so far is hold back his science project because he was too proud to admit Pluto was no longer classified as a planet and asked Summer for money.
>>
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>>77619571
Taking Jerry out of the picture, now who would you choose?
>>
>>77619719

If Jerry is left out then its still easy.

Butters' dad has kinda mellowed over the years.
>>
>>77619827
Stephen. He's unreasonable, but at least oblivious to a lot of shit. If Butter was just smarter his life would be better.
>>
So basically everyone unanimously agrees that Clay is a giant turd?
>>
>>77619878
I can't agree to that.

Clay is far too horrible to be classified as a turd.
>>
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>>77619682
Smart choice, Boco.
>>
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>>77619878

A bastard flavored bastard with bastard filling.

>And I'm GLAD I shot you!
>>
>>77619621
That's actually an interesting point. I know a couple of guys who had a shitty, drunken, abusive father and they became really decent guys (and in one case a really good dad) driven by a desire to never be like their dad.

Still fucks plenty of people up I guess, but occasionally bad fathers do somehow create better kids, maybe even better than they would have been otherwise.
>>
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Taking over your thread OP
wich was worst?
>>
>>77619595
this
>>
>>77619571
Jerry, obviously
A giant bonus if I also get Beth as a hot milf mom
>>
>>77619935
clay
>>
>>77619935

Clay.

Cotton at least loved Bobby and tried to be good to him.
>>
>>77619935
Cotton, easy, hank turned out alright. This thread is quickly becoming who's a worse father than Clay, I nominate Heihachi Mishima.
>>
>>77620087
Orel also turned out alright, if that's your qualification to which father you'd rather have.

As a matter of fact, I'd argue Orel is a better person than Hank.
>>
>>77620087
I meant cotton for better father.
>>
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A challenger appears
>>
>>77619925
Orel was too pure and submissive for his own good and he got hurt for it.

Any child with a fragment of narcissism or self-respect as well impartial reasoning would have survived the Clay's treatment.
>>
>>77620124
We don't really know much about Adult Orel other than the fact that he had a happy family. As a kid he managed to do quite a bit of damage ie that time he knocked up all those women with that turkey baster.
>>
>>77620124
Hank is flawless m8
Would have looked up to him as a father
>>
>>77619935
Clay. Cotton killed fitty men.
>>
Clay

Clay has every single right to be angry at his children and Bloberta

>Bloberta isn't faithful
>Shapey and Doughy both suffer from Autism
>Orel is the cause of 99% of all the problems that happen in the show

Clay is probably a really nice guy when he isn't guzzling his pain away
>>
Jerry.

Jerry is just kind of incompetent while the other two are all kinds of fucked up.
>>
>>77620215

Honestly, he might have turned out fine, or at least less miserable, if it hadn't been for his bitch of a wife.
>>
If anyone picks Stephen just remember he visited gay brothels and beat his son so bad Comedy Central censored the episode.
>>
>>77620267
>not wanting to visit gay brothels with your dad
>>
>>77619571

Jerry's the only one who genuinely treats his kids with love. He's just kind of a moron and a coward.
>>
>>77620215
Clay sucks. Everyone else makes his life miserable, but Clay sucks.

Bloberta is pretty much unredeemable, though.
>>
>>77619571
>would shoot you in the leg and pretend it was a bear
>has sex with men behind his wife's back and will ground you for the dumbest things
>is kind of a whiner
Come on Morty, it's pre*uuurp*tty obvious who I would choose. Morty, you gotta, you gotta stop reading this in my voice, Morty.
>>
>>77620426
don't tell me what to do Rick! m-maybe i want to read it in your voice
>>
>>77620472
That's crazy Morty, you, you gotta calm down Mo*uuuurp*orty
>>
>>77620492
you, you think that's weird, rick? what about two people in a far off universe who are, you know, typing in our speech patterns o-on a Vietnamese shadow puppet forum?
>>
>>77620550
That's crazy Morty, who in their right mind would enjo*uuuurp*y that?
>>
>>77620426
>has sex with men behind his wife's back
That's the thing, it's implied he hadn't yet. The Coach kept trying and seducing him, and as summarized in Abstinence (the special homemade episode after cancellation that just got shown in a con but is now in YouTube), the people in Moralton are just starved for kindness and attention and just can't stop themselves from associating it with sex.

Clay never fucked the Coach, but wasn't far from doing so because the Coach's advances were getting to him to the point where he felt he loved the Coach. However, he didn't, and that's proved when Censordoll seduces him as well by indulging in his mommy issues.

He's not in love with anyone, he's not gay: he's just lonely.
>>
>>77620599
I was talking about Stephen.

I know in Clay's case it was implied he would just bone whomever asked because he just wants attention.
>>
>>77620599
he's talking about butter's dad
>>
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I'd take all of them before him
>>
>>77620638
I don't think he rapes boys.
Does he?
>>
>>77620618
>>77620634
haha oh wow

I assumed it was just Clay because he did and does all of those. Seriously, fuck Clay.
>>
>>77620638
Depends if you'd rather get raped or shot in the leg.

I wouldn't like being limp for the rest of my life, though I probably wouldn't enjoy my anus bleeding every night either. Tough choices.

>>77620666
666 confirms Clay for being the devil.
>>
>>77620638
Who is he?
>>
>>77620716

He molests his daughter and makes her hide it.
>>
>>77620716
The kind of guy who'd force his family to maintain appearances while everyone knows he's constantly raping his little daughter.
>>
>>77619571
Jerry he's a fucking pushover you could just do whatever you want with him.
>>
>>77620740
But which series is he from?
>>
>>77620765
http://imgur.com/a/mDf8c
>>
>>77620765
http://imgur.com/a/mDf8c
>>
>>77619571
Who would win in a fight between the three?
>>
>>77620822
not too sure, but i know jerry would immediately lose
>>
>>77620822
>>77620862
Stephen. Hands down.
>>
>>77620822

I wanna say Stephen, since he has a military background.
>>
>>77620087
But Heihachi is an amazing dad.
>>
>>77619595
/thread.
>>
>>77620981
He chucked little kazuya off a cliff, lousy parenting in my book.
>>
>>77620822
Stephen, in less than 60 seconds
>Jerry punches Clay and breaks his hand, goes down crying
>Clay falls over from drunkenness and passes out when he hits the ground
>>
>>77619595
Really Jerry didn't get as bad until Season 2, where they made his one character trait "wimp"
But he still cares about his family even if he's confused about his marriage
>>
>>77620239
All she did was introduce him to alcohol, not predicting that it would turn him into a monster. Then he ruins her life while she cleans the pain away.
>>
Jerry would be a good dad if he grew some balls and divorced his wife, same with Beth. Their shitty sham of a marriage is what's really ruining their kids' lives.
>>
Jerry.
>>
>>77621210

She also forced him into marriage and having children, neither of which he wanted.
>>
>I am drowning there is no sight of land
>you are coming down with me
>hand in unlovablehand
>>
>>77619571

It's not really even a question. Jerry is a stupid selfish asshole but he does love his son and is supportive when it counts. Also as far as I know he never beat Morty.
>>
>>77619935

Clay. Cotton never shot Hank. He might have wanted to but he had the self control not to. That's how a real functioning alcoholic works. Also Cotton killed fiddy men. The only thing Clay ever killed were hopes and dreams.
>>
>>77619571
Jerry
>>
>>77621210
She literally made a meal ticket out of him, turned him into an alcoholic and when she realized she didn't like what she made him into, started cheating on him. She's bad, whether you count her inconsequential along with the directly selfish actions or not.
>>
>>77620215
I will say it's understandable Clay is why he is. Doesn't make what he does okay.

His wife is a true satan.
>>
>>77620800
Wow. Call me a pussy or a faggot but that kind got to me.
>>
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>>77619571
>>77619935
What if you add stormin Norman?
>>
>>77621487
>what she made him into

he was always like that

the alcohol just brought it to the surface

it's like you learned nothing from the show
>>
>>77620665
He holds the rest of his family in terror. They're all deathly afraid of him, except Clarissa who already wants to die.
>>
>>77620172
No he isn't, he was a fucking paranoid moron who couldn't adapt to the new world.
>>
>>77621603
He wasn't always like that. He was a tormented guy doing his best to keep it together until she got him drunk because it made it easier for him to go along with her ideas of marrying so she wouldn't feel like an outcast in her own family anymore.

He was depressed but under control until he met her. She sent him on a spiral down everything shitty and he never recovered.
>>
>>77621693

I feel like you're projecting onto him just a little bit, there, guy.
>>
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>>77619571
>mfw realizing all of them had homosexual relations
>>
>>77619935
Cotton, any day. He'll teach me to shoot instead of shooting me.
>>
>>77621709
>Green shirts
>Brown hair
>In the closet
>Fucked up marriages
>Idealistic sons who struggle to not lose their softness despite the fucked up people around them
>>
>>77621693
The entire point of the "true nature" metaphor was that was Clay's TRUE NATURE. He used alcohol as an excuse to be a horrible person. Bloberta wasn't perfect. Far from it. But really she just gave him the push he needed to become a monster. It was only a matter of time that would happen, even if it weren't for her.
>>
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>>77620087
>>77620151
I nominate Handsome Jack from the Borderlands series.
>>
>>77621709
gays shouldnt be allowed to reproduce or adopt children.

There I said it.
>inb4 /pol/ boogeyman
>>
>>77619571
>all of them almost had a gay affair at some point
>shitty father
>brown hair

I didn't know this was a trope until now.
>>
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>>77620800
>>77620809

Frank Castle apperance when?
>>
>>77621769
I'm not saying he was nice either, but he was under control until she fucked him up big time. Without her, when his true nature finally came out he wouldn't have a family to resent, or a high-responsibility job. He'd just hate himself to death, probably alone, without harming anyone else. At worse, he'd do a suicide-by-cop, based on what we've seen.
>>
>>77621788
None of them are gay though. Both Stephen and Jerry are bisexual, and Clay seems to just love whoever gives him attention. Mostly, he loves himself.

>There I said it.

It's not like you're saying anything new or revolutionary that hasn't been said before.
>>
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He's got to be up there right?
>>
>>77621788
The problem is that they're closeted not that they're gay.

Release your true gay nature faggot.
>>
>>77621866
>Mostly, he loves himself.
No, Clay definitely doesn't love himself. He wants someone to distract him from how much he hates himself.
>>
>>77621880
Honestly, I'd say he's even worse than Clay. At least Clay fucked up everyone in his family equally. Heinz's father mainly targeted him and him only.
>>
>>77621788
I'm actually gay and I agree with this. The best environment to be raised in is with a mother and father who know how to raise children and have the finances to do so. That being said a lot of straight couples who have kids and don't meet those requirement shouldn't be allowed to have them either.
>>
>>77620087
>He doesn't understand that lions throw there cubs off cliffs to see which are strong
I bet your combat isn't even limb based
>>
>>77621787
he was barely a character in 2, was anything really done with him in pre-sequel or telltale game?
>>
>>77622214
The Pre-Sequel was about him, actually; How he became the president of Hyperion between Borderlands 1 and 2

Still haven't played it, even though i loved BL2 and the dlc
>>
>>77622251
the gameplay's fine, some of the DLC had some solid good moments the main game was weak overall with narrative.
>>
>>77621787
Haven't played it but guess any dad that's the final boss of a game would have to be worse than clay.
>>
>>77619571
>a complete monster, a complete asshole, a kinda shitty but still lovable dad

Jerry without question. The only thing that might make me hesitate is if Butter's dad had a REALLY good paying job as opposed to Jerry's chronic lack of employment. Even then I'd probably still stick with Jerry because I wouldn't want to be grounded over bullshit all the time.
>>
>>77619571
>Clay

One of these things is NOT like the other. One of these things just doesn't belong.
>>
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>>77620809
>I don't want to think about what monsters like him taste like
>Sour pennies.
Was having a good day, needed this reminder life sucks.
>>
>>77622504
>The only thing that might make me hesitate is if Butter's dad had a REALLY good paying job as opposed to Jerry's chronic lack of employment.

Careful what you wish for, there was that episode where the Stotches were going to sell Butters to Paris Hilton.
>>
>>77620267
Wait, when was that?
>>
>>77622590
The first thing was from Butters' Very Own Episode, the second one I can't remember the exact episode, but I know what the original anon is talking about.
>>
>>77622582
Sorry about that, misery loves company.
>>
>>77622590
The former was Butter's Very Own Episode or something, and the latter was the episode literally right after it.
>>
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>>77622391
Never diddled his kid like Clarissa's pap, but he used her to get where is today.

His daughter is a "siren"; One of 5 women with magical powers. She tricks the MCs in 1 & 2 up until she betrays him. She comes up with a plan to beat her father, which involves killing her because she's in some kind of machine that pumps fluid into her to amplify her powers.
It's also implied through recordings he may've killed his wife.

One thing, I will say, is that he did care a little about her. He vows that he'll kill you after that, and even threatens to horribly mutilate and torture anyone that kills you, just because he wants to kill you himself.
>>
>>77621709
Sleepy Gary doesn't count, he wasn't real
>>
>>77622590
At the end of Freak Strike (s06e01) you see an exterior shot of the house and can hear belt strikes and Butters crying. CC cut that out of all the repeats but it's still on the DVDs.
>>
>>77622149
They'll also eat their cubs from time to time, Lions are lousy role models.
>>
>>77622763
He was also shown getting ready to use a belt on Butters in Grounded Vindaloop, but it's hard to tell if that's the real Stephen or not.
>>
>>77621982
At least Heinz's father ended up kind of caring about him in the end. His mother remained the same awful bitch she was when he was a little kid.
>>
>>77622763
Weird. The Mega archive lists it as episode six.
https://mega.nz/#F!3Iw0xDhL!fWIe0o9UTbPdLwR6FCMW7g!bZ5lmCzb
>>
>Once again.
>My son comes into the house.
>Beat to shit.

Marty's in equal shit-itude to Clarissa's dad, and maybe even worse.
>>
>>77622965
Marty:
>Diddled his daughter because she resembles her late mother
>Kept her inside all the time
>beat the shit out of her brother
>Drank all the time
>Gave fuck any attention or help to the two of them
>Daughter ends up committing suicide
>This forces his son into depression and gives him a painkiller addiction


I question child services in Clarissa's and LISA's universes
>>
>>77623906
You'd be surprised anon. Ever read that bio book of that guy who as a kid his mom tortured him, only ever fed him his little brothers shit and stabbed him among other crazy shit?
>>
>>77620809
Man, I was the victim of rape growing up and it takes a lot to shake me but Clarissa is the one thing that really manages to legit trigger me. That one is the bath, god damn it.

There's some missing stories from here, aren't there? One where they're in the car?
>>
>Had Clay as a dad
>Have Stephen for an older brother

Is being dead inside count as crippled?
>>
>>77624507
Yeah, the car and the following factory ones. Those are kind of new.
>>
>>77622715

He cared as much about her as a kid cares about a broken toy, his revenge is driven through ego, not feelings for his kid.

She wanted you to brutally murder him for what he did to her and everyone else, that said a lot about what she thought of him.
>>
Clay. All I ever wanted growing up is for my Dad to fuck off and leave me alone. Bonus is I could blame my alcoholism on him and feel less guilty about killing my liver.
>>
>>77622940
Did he really care about him?
I mean he recognised that the gnome that got smashed was the one they used to own but beyond that not much.
>>
>>77628170
That's still more appreciation than his mother ever showed for anything he did.
>>
>>77623906
>>77624008
The book you're referring to has recently been brought to doubt on accuracy, HOWEVER I have had family members and friends with similarly awful parents. So yes, despite social services being around, adults can still fail to save children.
>>
>>77622940
I'd hate my mom too if she didn't even show up to my birth.
>>
>>77622214
the telltale game give a bit more information, apparently angel accidentally killed her mother and the second wife left after she found out angel was a siren. Some speculation about his fall into evil is him trying to find a way to make her normal.
>>
>>77620822

>Clay
>Fights

Did you forget when Clay purposely antagonized 3 people over at Forgetti's and begged them to punch him

Clay is a masochist the only way his father ever acknowledged him was when he hit him.
>>
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>>77622391
but Big Boss did nothing wrong
>>
>>77629440
that wasn't really masochism. It wasn't sexual.
Just self loathing and a desire for acknowledgement. Making someone angry is proof you matter.
>>
>>77621843
I'm pretty sure I've seen an image someone requested in like a drawthread of Frank beating the fuck out of the dad.
>>
>>77629591
war is wrong
>>
>all these people hating Clay

Clay did nothing wrong.

The true villain is Bloberta and Coach Stopframe
>>
>>77619595
Honestly this. He's a spineless coward, but he's not a monster
>>
>>77619571
Well whichever one I pick, I'm just going to end up the same way I am with my real father: living far away from him and hoping we never have to come in actual contact again. So that narrows it down to whichever one might have the best genes. I'm guessing that's Mr. Scotch considering Butters is canonically pretty.
>>
>>77620215
>Doughy

What?

It's Block and Shapey and Block is the other families kid.
>>
>>77619571
>>all are closeted homosexuals
>>all have brown hair
>> all are insecure in their masculinity
>>2 are assholes that take their failings out on their family, one is just a failure that takes it out on himself

jerry, at least he doesn't try to treat everyone else like shit for his short comings. my real dad was more like butters dad though without the gay.
>>
>>77620665

Isn't it implied that he diddled his younger son as well as Clarissa?
>>
>>77622744

I kind of think Jerry is at the point where he'd respond to anyone who seemed to honestly care about him no matter who or what they are.
>>
>>77620638

If Clarissa doesn't stab him in the dick at some point during the upcoming revival, I'm going to be disappointed.
>>
>>77619827
I could manipulate them both. The problem is the children that they raise are naive and innocent.
>>
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>>77622965
>>77623906

>Forced Brad to down a beer and then go have sex with Lisa
>It's implied that's the singularity that filled Brad with guilty self-loathing and made Lisa kill herself
>>
>>77621733
If all three of these men were put in a room together do you think they would have a threesome while crying their eyes out?
>>
>>77625041
>had Clay as a mom
>had Jerry as an older brother
I feel the pain.
>>
>>77630986
Possibly. Clarissa's brother was afraid of conflict. It's just as likely that their father was abusive towards him, though not necessarily sexually.
>>
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>>77620426
>>77620472
>>77620492
>>77620550
>>77620583
>>
>>77619571
Jerry is easily the best dad out of the three you posted.
>>
>>77619595
That was the first thought that immediately came to mind.
>>
I AM DROWING
>>
Jerry. He's a whiny doormat who would be easy to ignore.
>>
>>77619827
stephen.

forget having clay as a dad. he already reminds me of my real one.
>>
>>77630480
war has changed
>>
>>77629591
Venom Snake did nothing wrong. Big Boss is a dick.
>>
>>77619595
If you were Jerry and Beth's kid then Rick would be your grandfather which would mean you'd get psychologically traumatized until your mind breaks. Butter's parents would be best because they'd be easiest to manipulate and work around.
>>
>>77621570
It's supposed to anon, it's supposed to.
>>
Butter's dad.
If I showed attitude to Jerry I'd feel bad, though as Jerry is I think I wouldn't.
Clay? Fuckthatshit
Butter's Dad? "You're grounded" Fuck you!
"You're double grounded!" Oh whippersnaps...
Thread posts: 160
Thread images: 22


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