Is there a real life lembas bread? How does make elf bread?

2 parts baking soda
1 part flour
4 parts vinegar
egg
bake it

>>9414087
No, but you can make irl cram, the bread men and dwarves make that's similar but vastly inferior. It's called hard tack in this world.

>a small and lightweight energy source that can sustain you for hours with small amounts

It's called cocaine.

>>9414108
Something tells me you've never done white.

put speed in bread

bake

>>9414108
>Hours
Ahahaha

File: 1505122083088.jpg (55KB, 694x488px) Image search: [Google]

55KB, 694x488px

>>9414118
>thinks white is cocaine
boy u've never done girl have u?

>>9414087
protip: use cricket flour
t.elf

>>9414130
get yo hood nigga ass out of here, but you don't even acetone wash your balls, boy

>>9414087
What are pop tarts?

>>9414087

here's a guess from me. it just needs to be high in slow-burning calories

>teff flour or other high-protein flours...and/or high-fat ancient grain, tuber, or nut. like amaranth, dock, black walnuts, hickory nuts, pine nuts, etc
>add dried milk powder, high fat cream, or whey leftover from cheesemaking, and eggs
>roll into dough, fold out, add finely minced suet or cold nearly frozen butter between layers and refold and roll out like biscuits/phyllo dough until satisfactory
>optional: brush with honey before baking
>eat with preserves, dried meats, or slices of pemmican

>>9414176
Good post. Op could use Kodiak cake base too.

>>9414132
Don't listen to this faggot, elves just tell you to do this so they can giggle at you for eating bugs.

File: DIbn21IWsAAvESs.jpg (21KB, 333x249px) Image search: [Google]

21KB, 333x249px

>>9414144
>mfw whitey tries to flex

>>9414184
yeah, those are good. that's kinda the direction i was going. wanted to keep it authentic to what elves might have used since they're more off-the-wild and less 'i buy my stuff from costco'

>>9414130

bet you've never done moon rocks

>>9414212
I've done a lot of molly in my time but now it's p much only ice booze n weed hbu?

>>9414196
Sorry, my good sir, but it is my assertion that you have never purified the cut from a 3.5 milligram serving, and are a piece of utter refuse.

Noob ass fuckstick. I bet you think coke gets you "tweaked," instead of it being all the caffeine and vitamins it's cut with.

>>9414291
nah i hate coke it's tina and molly for me coke is for bitches like you

>>9414307
If they did an autopsy on me, they'd hit rainbow. You're the bitch, my good trailer trash sir.

>>9414108
>for hours with small amounts
nigga what

>>9414347
If you had a brick the size of that elf bread, I could ration that out for weeks.

>>9414087
Take those powdered swole supplements. Add a whole tin into any bread recipe. Wala.

>>9414087
I think the only food comparable in size/ calories of lambas bread would be pemmican . It's shredded meat mixed with berries . Dehydrated down to nothing then shredded/mixed with lard . A whole block could sustain someone for a long time .

>>9414176
Actually sounds like a really good recipe.

However, I think that lembas bread would need to be twice baked. Once to bake it, and then again later to sort of dehydrate and harden it so that it was somewhat like a giant cracker, or hardtac.

Would have to be eaten with preserved foods/etc like you said for full effect. And would need a cold glass of either milk, ale, or ice cold water for even more effect. I might actually write down and try this recipe.

>>9414108

Why didn't Frodo use cocaine instead of lembas bread?

>>9414449
He used the ring didn't he?
>Momentary feelings of invincibility followed by cold sweats and an urge to do it again

>>9414400
>like a giant cracker, or hardtac

I disagree. Tolkien made it clear that they had to be wrapped in those elven tree leaves which obviously had a preservative effect as well as contributing to their power to sustain. Hardtack is the last thing they would have been like in terms of both flavor and texture.

penis bread

In your imagination it tastes divine, in reality it would kill a small shard of your innocence and child like wonder, unless your goal is to quantify the taste as compared to other samples and styles of bread in which case your already dead inside

File: internet here i come.jpg (101KB, 550x524px) Image search: [Google]

101KB, 550x524px

>Rations for various RPG Races
https://imgur.com/t/food/BWnHF

I always imagined it as like a shortbread but made with nut flours or flax seeds instead.

>>9414885
That looks amazing

>>9414400
i'm glad it sounds alright. i tried to make it palatable too. it's similar to the stuff i make when i go innawoods for a long time

>>9414676
the leaves are there to keep them not-stale yet not-moist to mold, protecting it from light, rain, and well.. dirt and shit. i also took it to mean they're high in fat, since light hitting fat will cause it to be rancidified.