American "cheese"

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>>9381631
>2016
>current year
Are you kidding me?

>he doesn't want to eat cellulose to further envision germany past crime of slaughtering most of gods chosen people and how bad the jews had it by eating potato peel soup and sawdust bread

What are you some kind of neo-nazi?

Oy gevalt tis anotha shoa

>>9381631
>people literally buy grated parmesan cheese

>>9381631
I like how every article calls it wood pulp just to be dramatic. It's vegetable fibre.

As long as it tastes like Parmesan, I don't see the problem. It's not like you eat it for the nutritional value.

>>9381676
>As long as it tastes like Parmesan

And it doesn't tste anything like proper Parmiggiano-reggiano, so that's the first of it's problems.

It's second problem is that it doesn't melt/dissolve into sauces like the proper stuff does. So if you're making a sauce like Alfredo, for example, you'll end up with a gritty mess instead of a nice smooth sauce.

>>9381688
It's a decent approximation, and I don't think it's meant for sauces.

>>9381688
That's why it's dirt fucking cheap. Poor people want cheese too.

You can't have cheap and have quality, and it's not like you're eating radioactive arsenic that some dastardly Snidley Whiplash businessman snuck into your cheese because he's a dick.

>>9381707
>It's a decent approximation
It's not good enough.

>and I don't think it's meant for sauces
Clearly it's not. Which is just another of its problems.

>>9381710
Yeah, I get that. But one thing I have noticed is that often times the real deal ends up being a lot cheaper than one might think. It's so much more flavorful that you don't need very much of it compared to the cheap stuff.

Sometimes I put parm on pizza. If I'm at a pizza place I end up dousing it in that fake stuff they have on the table because you need a lot to get any flavor. If I'm at home then a quick grating of some P-reg on there achieves a better flavor with FAR less.

>>9381710
>and it's not like you're eating radioactive arsenic that some dastardly Snidley Whiplash businessman snuck into your cheese because he's a dick.

Yeah, I agree it's not dangerous or toxic or anything like that. But it's sure as fuck not anywhere close to being a good substitute for the real thing.

>>9381710
>You can't have cheap and have quality
We could strive for a middle ground like countries that have been making cheese for thousands of years have managed to do.

But nah. The only options are 20 pound bags of Sargento wood chip fake "parmesan" made by the Wisconsin Internet Defense Force that cost $3 (minimum quantity 1000), and $79/lb raw milk cheese hand made by white hipster girls who raise their own goats in a loft in Bushwick, delivered by a F2M trannie on a vintage Flying Pigeon bicycle purchased at a street fair in Shanghai's Huangpu district, and sold by personal referrals only

Capitalism +1
Communism -9000

>>9381716
If it wasn't good enough, nobody would buy it.

>>9381737
I don't buy it. Wanna know why? Because it's not fucking good enough.

>>9381631
>Bloomberg
>Could be

>>9381746
Why does it continue to sell?

>>9381784
Some combination of:
-other people have different preferences
-other people shop by cost alone
-other people haven't ever tried the real thing and aren't even aware what they're missing.

What does that have to do with anything though? Why should I care about other people's standards? They are welcome to do as they please.

>>9381631
I eat bamboo shoots and have had to eat the pithy part of bark before
6/10 would eat again.

>>9381726
underrated

>>9381631
to be honest their wood cheese is pretty good. it doesn't taste anything like parmesan, but it has its own cheesy flavor. it's insanely dry so when you mix it in with pasta and sauce, it'll absorb all the sauce and add a great texture

>>9381797
If other people don't matter, what does "good enough" mean to you?

>>9381861
Whatever is the best (to my palate) that I can possibly get that isn't also prohibitively expensive.

>>9381726
>Wisconsin Internet Defense Force
Lmfao

Anyway dude you can go to pretty much any grocery store in the US and get a mid range wedge of parmesan. It's not that expensive drama queen.

>>9381726
I would ask why you know what a flying pigeon bike is but I assume you must have a bike-hipster roommate or live in close enough proximity to them.

>>9381631
Just make your own. However, the Amish make killer cheeses.

Why don't people buy solid blocks of cheese and use a grater? You would get rid of this problem completely if you weren't a lazy pig like most middle class Americans.

Some seasonings have sand in them. It's to prevent caking.

>>9381952
Probably because real parm reg is several times the price of that fake shit.

And there's a longstanding tradition among the "working class" that looks down upon things they consider "too fancy". Cheese that costs $20/lb certainly fits that bill.

Personally, I buy the real stuff and slice it myself. I never buy pre-sliced or shredded cheese. Sometimes I do buy cheese from the deli and I ask them to cut me a big block of it. It always, without fail, confuses the fuck out of the person behind the counter. They are shocked that someone doesn't want it pre-sliced. Their first reaction is that they don't even how how to cut it. They'll say "but the machine only cuts up to this thick" (holds up fingers). When I suggest that they use a knife or a wire it's like they just made some great mental discovery. Their second reaction is to ask why I want a block instead of sliced. I explain that the block keeps longer, and I am free to slice, grate, or cut it into chunks whereas if I have them pre-sliced it's useless for anything but sandwiches. Most people are cheese plebs.

>>9381952
People do. Why would you think people don't when every store that sells cheese has blocks? Parmesan blocks are usually not sold in smaller grocery stores though. I just order mine when I don't have access to raw milk for making it.

>>9381980
This is actually a good idea, but there has to be a simpler way to get a block of cheese. Has anyone ever refused to cut a block of it for you?

>>9381952
There's no excuse really. Imported Parmigiano-Reggiano with the stamp on the rind is widely available. While more expensive, it's well worth it since you only grate a small amount into most dishes and it lasts forever. After you eat it, the pre-grated sawdust is beyond atrocious.

Like another anon said, it's partly because a relatively large percent of amerilards are scared of "foreign" foods and another percent (some overlap) are the idiots who see a higher price and think it's some (((scam))) without realizing that you use a fraction of the amount compared to the wood pulp since it has an actual flavor instead of sawdust.

>>9381886
That sounds reasonable, but if that's what it means to everyone, your only argument against it being good enough is that other people's preferences are wrong.

>>9381676
>as long as it tastes like parmesan

It tastes like salty sawdust. I can't believe I used to like it.

>>9382030
>Has anyone ever refused to cut a block of it for you?
Nope, they're just surprised/confused at first. The cheese department always has a knife and a wire cutter already; that's how they cut up some of the cheeses out on display.

Any high-quality cheese is going to come in a block, wedge, or other whole shape anyway. This is only an issue for the mid-tier stuff they sell at the deli.

>>9382071
Obviously it can't mean the same thing for everyone since different people have different tastes when it comes to food.

Heck, it even varies by application (recipe). I consider myself a cheese snob. I'm one of the first people to talk shit about processed cheese, pre-shredded cheese, fake parm, etc. But you know what? For making cheeseburgers or classic (simple) grilled cheese sandwiches you can't beat the garbage that is Kraft Singles. They have the perfect flavor and texture for a cheese burger, and I'll buy them for exactly that purpose.

>>9381945
I don't have a roommate
I guess I'm the "bike hipster" although I am not much of a hipster
But, I haven't owned a cage since Bill Clinton was president

>>9381918
But isn't that troubling enough? 24 month parmigiano-reggiano DOP costs quite a bit less than fairly pedestrian albeit high quality domestic cheeses

>>9382086
The concept of "good enough" would be the same. Individual perceptions would differ. The point being "good enough" is not something that can be argued for or against if it's only an extremely personal preference, like you've just explained.

I like blue but I can't tell you that green is a bad color.

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>>9381688

>>9381716
>But one thing I have noticed is that often times the real deal ends up being a lot cheaper than one might think. It's so much more flavorful that you don't need very much of it compared to the cheap stuff.
That's true. All you have to do is ask the cheese manager at your grocery store and he'll probably turn you on to some good shit. That's what they're their for after all.

>>9381724
Hell no it's not. But it is something.

>>9381726
Would you rather not have cheese at all? Also there is a middleground, but with certain products consumers like to either go all in with expensive stuff or to pinch pennies and get cheap swill.

There's really nothing wrong with that. Those products exist because consumers want them.

>Be yuroppor
>muslims taking over country
>government strips you of your rights
>masdive taxes for inferior healthcare
>have to pay a TV license
>only thing that brings you happiness is shitposting about American cheese

>>9382049
>it's partly because a relatively large percent of amerilards are scared of "foreign" foods
that's not true at all. stop believing memes.

>>9382381
seriously, if anything Americans both flyover and coastie overrate European food. Just look at what we have done to the reputation of German beer. Pretty mediocre stuff that almost all Americans assume is good

>>9382387
Eh, it's not mediocre it's just unvaried. Reinheitsgebot is good and bad. It's good because the quality is consistent but it's not good because it's hard to make something really stand out because it's so strict.

I'd say you were certainly correct a decade or two ago, when all most people argued about was whether Bud or Miller was better and you had people that said American beer was water and European beer like Stella was the best. But with the craft beer craze everyone recognizes that American beer is more than just domestic light beer. I meet old people and young people alike who love craft beer.

European food I agree is overrated. I don't think it's European or American that makes the difference it's how the food is prepared and the quality of ingredients. I found plenty of basic restaurants when I traveled Germany that I wouldn't rate any higher than basic restaurants in America: the difference is chains weren't as common in Germany as they are here in America so I think people's perception of American food is large portions low quality like Arby's. The solution is pretty simple, just don't go to large American chains.

>>9382405
You see the same thing amongst craft beer drinkers with Belgian beer. Legitimately good stuff, but generally overrated but craft beer people

>>9382387
Sorry but most days I'd rather a balanced Hell or Marzen than an overwrought oak-blasted bourbon novelty beer clocking in at 397 IBU and 12% alcohol. Just because you stood in line for it doesn't make it good, nor do the swear words on the label

When you get a little older you might understand

>>9382416
Americans can go to some random ass super market and buy all sorts of top tier beers of all sorts of styles and strengths, also they can get a bunch of German beer that is like 10% better than Bud for the price of legitimately good beer

>>9382420
The main reason I mostly drink domestic is freshness. America is still going through the awkward adolescent phase when it comes to beer. Same deal with wine, most of our stuff is just awful. Undrinkable, over-oaked, boozy fruit bombs designed to appeal to people with the palates of children. The good stuff takes too much effort to find and generally costs too much.

>>9382426
>America is still going through the awkward adolescent phase when it comes to beer
I don't think this is true at all. Just a tiny fraction of American beer is the unbalanced California style IPA, or 15% ABV super fucking wierd ingredient shit people like to whine about on here. American beer is way the fuck ahead of the rest of the world right now, you can so easily find incredible beer of an extremely wide variety of styles. Northern Europe is starting to follow in America's tracks, but central/southern/eastern Europe have a really long ways to go

But these trends are good for everyone, beer across the western world is getting better every year

>>9382457
Yeah yeah. I'm too tired to have this discussion again for the 100th time. If I disagree with you I'm trolling or insane and have literally never set foot in America, etc. I understand.

To this anon's boss at the WIDF, please pay him anyway as he works hard and he does a good job of defending Wisconsin's honor. Even if his post count is a little low tonight it's the public's fault for not engaging. Sorry I'm just a bit too drunk, good night WIDF-kun.

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>>9381631
>be Ameriboo
>don't understand what cellulose is
>mock Americans for adding it to cheese
>call it wood pulp
>realize it exists in most vegetables
>stop eating vegetables to avoid eating "wood pulp"
>dies of malnutrition

>>9382468
Its not a matter of opinion or argument. the vast majority of Americans have access to incredible beer of all sorts of styles at reasonable prices

If you think American beer is just West Coast IIIPA, and Ghost Pepper Russian Imperial stout you are objectively wrong, and most likely intentionally being disingenuous

>>9382426
>most of our stuff is just awful. Undrinkable, over-oaked, boozy fruit bombs designed to appeal to people with the palates of children
You're such a contrarian, dude. I know you're going to get defensive now but I don't care. You're literally describing one style of beer.

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>>9381676
As long as this tastes like peanut butter, I don't see the problem either

>>9382482
>be american
>think cheese is a vegetable
>get shot

>>9382722
>be Ameriboo
>read about cellulose being in celery
>make fun of people for eating "wood pulp"
>get ran over by Muslims in a van

>>9381675
Goes good on alfredo and spaghetti.

>>9382732
So does real parmesan you grate yourself

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>>9382720
0 carbs. Hmm....

>>9382904
>the virgin meme

You idiots give pussy far too much credit. A limp-wristed beta nu-male will STILL be a limp-wristed beta nu-male even after some bitch throws her pussy at him.

>>9382904
communists and fascists are pretty much the same though, both a bunch of authoritarian assholes with terrible ideas and little education

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>>9382380

>>9381631
It's not our fault the corporations screw us over.

>>9382922
>implying any bitch would ever do that
Being a virgin or not has nothing to do with it.
Virgins have personality traits that make them virgins.
Chads have personality traits that make them not virgins.
The term ``virgin'' is simply a linguistic shortcut to refer to these types of people.

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>>9382380

>>9383056
>The term ``virgin'' is simply a...

...term used by a bunch of beta faggots that put bitches on a pedestal.

>>9382380
That meme would work better if it had some truth to it desu

This is just tryhard

>>9383090
Are you denying that someone who consistently fails to have sex has some personal traits that prevent them from having sex, and that the inverse is also true?

>>9383139
Are you denying that sticking your dick in some bitch, or not, would change any of those traits?

>>9382353
That's not cheese at all.

>>9382927
We get it, ok? You like Horses

>>9382353
>NOW MELTS!

>>9381664
Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

>>9383502
https://youtu.be/TzZtcPxO8cc

>>9381726
>The only options are 20 pound bags of Sargento wood chip fake "parmesan" made by the Wisconsin Internet Defense Force that cost $3 (minimum quantity 1000), and $79/lb raw milk cheese
Try actually go shopping at a supermarket before saying such retarded things

>>9383726
holy shit. We have to go back

>>9381631
I don't know anyone, ANYONE, who eats that shit shaker "parmesan" anymore. I haven't seen anyone use that stuff since I was a kid, back in the eighties.

>>9381726
I like u

>>9383746

Don't you idiots buy actual parm from italy? It shreds just like normal cheese. You know that right?

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Buy this, you stupid idiots. It's at Costco. Your local idiot store. Put it on a cheese grater like you fucking morons do.

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>>9383726
I want to have sexual relations with this aspiring housewife and black lady.

>>9383752
Of course, what the fuck else would you buy if you wanted parmesan cheese? Every goddamn normal grocery store in the US sells official Parm Reg.

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>>9383756
>shopping at Costco

>>9383765

Right, so why does this fucking thread exist?

>>9383767

Grow up, you fuck up. Costco has well sourced food, you're just too stupid to figure that out. Go to Whole Foods or whatever childish grocery you shop at.

>>9383768
Idk, I didn't start it. I'm assuming there's still some people out there who don't know better.

>>9383772
Why don't YOU grow the fuck up and realize that supporting local businesses is better for the economy than giving your money to big box corporations.

>>9383128
its pretty true
UK is a shit tier police state overrun with mudslime

they constantly try to shit on US to make themselves feel relevant, when they clearly fucking arent.

>>9383785
t. amerishart with no passport

>>9383781
I know you're a stupid cunt that doesn't understand what Costco does, but they actually employ "purchasers" who buy the best products in their area, or their best region or the best in the world. It's the reason they can pay their generic employees 20 bucks an hour to just be good employees. So maybe figure your shit out before you sound like a massive asshole.

>>9383781
>>9383772
costco is a buy in scam
hence why he needs to shill it, rather than just talking about the food in question

he's acuck and a shill for a pyramid scheme only cucks would buy into

>>9383792
>implying that's what actually happens.
You're a fucking DOPE. Let me guess, you think Trader Joe's is shit, right?

>>9383795

Well, enjoy not going to that shitty place. I get all of my food that I can from there because it's utterly better than any grocery I have here. Better Steaks, better 80/20 beef, better olive oil, better 4 type of peppercorn pepper, better tomato paste, better sugar (15 bucks per 10kg of sugar), Just better everything I touch.

You stupid assholes can rot for all I care. I was trying to give you good advice. Personally, I hope you all suffer because you're stupid.

>>9383808
>crying this much because some strangers don't like your favorite food store.
Seriously guy......

>>9383820

Yeah i'm weeping my ass off. I'm here watching Aliens. Listening to you stupid assholes fuck your lives up. So.. seriously.

>>9383820

Sigourney Weaver is fucking hot.

>>9383820

Where'd you go hunny?

>>9383831
Even hotter if she really is a hermaphrodite

>>9383843
Thats Jamie Lee Curtis, hunny

>>9383843

I would love her hermaphrgina. Right in the hole.

>>9383830
>>9383831
>>9383840
Someone can't stop crying. You got issues. Must be a woman. Angry lesbian?

>>9383845

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTvQHh7BwA8

>>9383847

you just can't stop yourself. I love watching your life. Keep it up. You're a study in psychology.

>>9383861
>This much deflection and projection.
Yep, definitely an angry lesbian.

>>9383867

you need to create a new word. Proflection. So you don't sound like the dumbest asshole. Prolfection works. Or you're just a dull bastard we've all seen before.

>>9383873
>angry lesbian can't stop posting
You're one of THOSE. We get it, you have to have the last word so you can feel good about yourself. Go for it, you obviously are more fragile mentally than other posters here. Thanks for ruining the thread, asshole.

>>9383867

Where'd you end up, idiot?

>>9383889

I don't give a living shit about you. You're just on your own and probably suffering from something. I can't help you from here.

>double or triple posting
>"I love watching you losers"
>unnecessary details about his personal life

Uh oh the "luthier" is drunk again

>>9381726
kek

>>9383317
haha what a virgin

>>9382720
Holy shit, what is this?
0 carbs, 0 fat, 0 protein.
So its essentially salt + water + X to make it stiff? Why on earth would anyone eat that?

>>9384093

they extract the specifical chemicals that give peanuts their flavour and mix them into a base.

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>>9381631
>Be American
>Grill corn syrup meats
>Call it BBQ

>>9382353
partnering with nasa paid dividends

>>9384234
But what is the base made from? I'm no nutritionist, but doesn't any food contain at least one of the three: carbs, fat, protein?
If it does not, it's either water, or something inedible.

>>9384284
Explain konnyaku, then?

>>9384314
Things like konnyaku or jello contain a very small amount of protein or fiber and are mostly water.

>WOOD PULP OMG!
>it's vegetable fibers
Jesus christ. This is like the "antifreeze in Fireball" bullshit of yesteryear.

>>9383781
>that supporting local businesses is better for the economy than giving your money to big box corporations.
That doesn't make any sense

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pic related: American cheese knife

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This is a group of American farmers and cheesemakers, preparing cheese from wood pulp

>>9384383
>wood pulp
>noun
>wood fibre reduced chemically or mechanically to pulp and used in the manufacture of paper

>>9384421
Did they pasteurise the log beforehand?
If not the FDA will be on their case....

>>9381631
>American food market is one of the most regulated markets in the entire country
>shit like this still happens
>article calls for even more regulation by invoking the Reinheitsgebot which has completely stifled innovation in the German beer market so much that brewers over the years called for the relaxing of the Reinheitsgebot
When will they learn?

I'm a cheesemaker and I'm OK
I sleep all night and I work all day.

>>9384421
>bon iver is making cheese now
Well of course, they're from Wisconsin

>>9384399
Could see it as a thing