Coconut Oil

>>9331477
Terrific for masturbation. But then you smell like coconuts so it becomes a dead giveaway.

>>9331482
Do Americans really need to use lube in order to have sex?

>>9331492
yeah cuz our dicks are so big

>>9331492
masturbation isn't sex

>>9331482
>not enjoying the smell of coconut

Christ just tell people you use coconut scented lotion

>>9331477
I mean its so expensive I dont cook with it until I run out of other oil
I just use it for body stuff, like shoving things up my ass

>>9331504
Probably a safer assumption that anyone that smells like coconuts was recently masturbating.

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>>9331504
>You were masturbating with coconut oil, I can smell it!
>n-n-no, it's coconut scented lotion
>You were masturbating with coconut scented lotion!

I like putting some coconut oil around my collarbone as some sort of fragrance occasionally

Do people think someone facefucked me?

>>9331552

Top kek yes

>>9331511
>>9331538

You guys have never used lotion on your hands? People don't automatically assume you were just yanking the turtle because they're not autists.

>>9331604
Oh, they do. They're just not gonna tell you to your face.

>>9331492
It's because they bear the mark of the slaves from they Jewish overlords, making them unable to feel what sex or masturbation feels like to a normal human being.
>>9331497
>>9331501
Daily reminder that being cut will cuck you for life to the pleasures of sex, also you will always have that scar on your most sensitive part of your body reminding you that even your own body does not belong to you.

>>9331508
is it actually good for putting things in your ass? i always just use vegetable shortening

>>9331604
>mfw I use coconut scented lotion on my arms and chest every day before going out.
>mfw the compliments about how good I smell are really just them saying they think i've been jerking it

Jokes on them I jerk it dry.

>>9331725
I never noticed, desu.

>>9331492
if a female becomes aroused before sex she is a whore

nothing turns me off quicker than a wet pussy

>>9332539
Lol

>>9331477
I like to use it in place of butter when I make basmati rice. The flavors compliment each other perfectly.

>>9331482
i fell on my face longboarding and put coconut oil on the wound and then forgot about it
later i rode the bus to pick up my motorbike after a night of drinking and some chick moved seats and gestured to her boyfriend it was because i stank and i felt bad for a while until i remembered i smeared coconut oil all over my face and not everyone enjoys that smell

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>fried eggs cooked in coconut oil

God-tier

>>9331799
Why don't anybody here use sex lube? It's in the supermarket next to condoms.
They have sex lube in the US, right? Or are your forced to give yourself various genital infection and mycosis?

>>9332629
people prefer to use food. I remember in my last year living with roommates, I was cooking and couldn't find my nice $25 olive oil. I went looking for it and I found it next to my roommates's bed. I left it there, and carefully assembled what I estimated to be about $25 worth of food that they had purchased (it was quite a bit because they mostly ate garbage). I methodically threw it in the trash and bought a lockbox for my food.

>>9331725
I got a cut on my penis when I was 23 and when it healed I couldn't pull my foreskin back and had to be circumsized. I am glad I lost my hood the head of my cock feels much better now.

>>9331477
I use coconut oil to moisturise the head of my dick, im also uncut btw

>>9331477
Okay, sexual themes aside, it's a fat. Nothing to it. Not bad, not great, overpriced for a fat.

>>9332584
How fat are you exactly?

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>>9331725
Looks like someone still hasn't gotten over their phimosis.

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>>9331477

I use it while machining. Great smell without caustic oil everywhere.

Thankfully the increase in popularity has dropped the price.

>>9331477
It's good in coffee with stevia and heavy cream.

>>9331477
its good for cannabutter, has a higher fat content than butter so it absorbs more thc.

>>9331477
Its pretty good for frying. Its healthy and the falor isn't strong it taste pretty good too. Its just really expensive.
>>9331725
not all americans have jew dicks
>>9332539
Are you trolling or just don't understand how sex works?

>>9331604
>You guys have never used lotion on your hands?
Of course. It's inevitable every time I spank the monkey.

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I drink Irish whiskey and masturbate with coconut oil in my parents attic. AMA

>>9333272
Coconut oil is no healthier than butter. Refined fats are no different than refined sugars

>>9332734
>He's not on keto

>>9333272
t. venereal disease Patient Zero

>>9331477
It's great for dry mouth. Most of you are supposed to be medicated so, you're welcome for that tip. I add a tablespoon of it along with the same amount of butter to my coffee and it's a lot more smooth of a caffeine experience. It's good for your hair. A nice boost when you're starting a ketogenic diet. Overall I rate it an 8/10 for useful shit in the kitchen right behind baking soda for the amount of applications.

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>tfw circumcised
>don't need lube
>confused why anyone needs it
>laugh at people who care way too much about this and cry about it

Free shrugs