How can I make boiled peanuts if I don't live in the south?

>>9307984
Boil them in a very racist way.

you can probably just boil them and hope they don't realize they are not in the south

>>9309617
Could use a gps spoofer and a smart pot.

>>9309676
No, you need a dumb pot, and play country music around it.
Or use the pot you cook meth in to boil the peanuts.

>>9309692
no one listens to country in the south, just rap and numetal

>>9307984
they need to listen to Alabama blues in order to recognize you as worthy of their salty creamy goodness.

am from south can confirm.

>>9309711
t. Niggerlanta

>>9309617
They usually won't, the humidity in the pot will mask any lower humidity of the north so they won't be able to tell once they're boiling, just make sure you have the room full of steam before you dump them in to avoid tipping them off

>>9307984
ask one of your neighbors who was born in the south to boil them for you

>>9309711
>i've never heard of young country

Young country is all over the south and it's even worse than fucking rap.

Just turn the location tracker setting on your peanuts off.

Add some cotton to the water.

>>9310065
I call it joo country. Beer, baby, tractors

Get some chestnuts and roast them on an open fire

Really though don't you need green peanuts?

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This fucking thread

This is not a joke post. This is 100% serious. The was a guy who sold THE BEST boiled peanuts locally. After he sold them for literally decades, the health department found out his was pissing in his brine.
Piss makes boiled peanuts even better.

>>9312202
replytothispostoryourmotherwilldieinhersleeptonight.bmp

Ok listen up these hacks obviously have to much northern blood in em.

If you want to boil peanuts but you aren't in the south, it's very simple

>Purchase prepacked salted roasted peanuts
>Purchase a coke
>Drink some of the coke down to the top of the lable
>Pour in the peanuts

That's it!
Hope you enjoy.

>>9312257
>Peanuts in Coke
That's not boiled peanuts, that's a Full English

>>9307984
COCKONA

>>9312257
that's dtuch

>>9312257
That's a sandwich. We're looking for boiled peanuts.

>>9312257
You fucked up and told him how to make biscuits and gravy. Here's the real way to make boiled peanuts:

>Take a pot of water and bring to a boil. Add a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts. IMPORTANT: This recipe will only work if you are a member of the Krispy Kreme Klub.
>Let the donuts boil for twenty minutes, then drain and rinse with cold water.
>Fill the pot back up with water and boil again for twenty minutes. Drain and rinse.
>Fill the pot and boil, drain, and rinse a third time. YOU MUST DO THIS AT LEAST THREE TIMES OR ELSE YOUR DONUTS WILL BE POISONOUS.
>Add boiled peanuts bought from a gas station.

And there you have it! Peach cobbler. Easy, huh?

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>>9312957