[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y ] [Search | Free Show | Home]

ITT: Your worst experiences with foodborne illness.

This is a blue board which means that it's for everybody (Safe For Work content only). If you see any adult content, please report it.

Thread replies: 272
Thread images: 41

ITT: Your worst experiences with foodborne illness.
>>
Ate a quesadilla from Wawa. It was either the sour cream, or Maybe the chicken, also had bacon but doubtful.
Anyway, had a rock of shit plugging my ass for days while my body was trying to evacuate its bowels. Think, a perma chili night hot belly for 3 days straight, while feeling your stomach and bowels expanding.
I shat for an entire hour, and the smell almost made me throw up.
>>
>>9257483
mcdonalds. woke up middle of the night ran to toilet shit my brains out. A few minutes later my stomach was fucked so I threw up straight into my diarrhea. Went on every 30 minutes for 2 days. Shitting and puking into my shit and shitting some more.
>>
>In Dubai for 10 days
>Coulda been the food
>or the jet lag, water, heat or alcohol
>Have the squirts by day 3
>Liquid shits on the hour
>Probably should have gone to the hospital for dehydration
>Come home Memorial Day weekend
>Drink pedialyte at buddy's cookout
>>
>>9257518
did you try flushing periodically?
>>
>>9257557
no, it was dubai
>>
>>9257551
>a few minutes later
Why the fuck did you not flush?
>>
>>9257557
Did you like dubai
>>
I don't even know what I ate that got me

Anyway
>travel overseas
>projectile vomiting and explosive diarrhea until I have nothing left to emit except bile and mucous over the course of six hours until the clinics open
>doctor is in the middle of a fucking mall
>relatives drag my leaking ass through the middle of a mall while people look on amused
>doc gives me a shot in the butt
>right as rain in about thirty minutes

It has given me a new outlook on how bad things can get.
>>
>>9257483
Freshman year at uni, decided to put some olive oil on my salad rather than normal dressing.
Had really bad stomach pains, felt like I was going to have the squirts, but nothing happened.
>>
>>9257518
their sour cream is in refrigerated packets i doubt whatever dairy farm they got it from could get away with selling something that could make people sick, it probably came from their filthy disgusting chicken chunks
>>
>got food poisoning
>ate sushi less than hour before the feeling of puking came along
>proceed to puke $80 worth of sushi over an hour
>puke taste like fish
>toilet and whole bathroom reeks of fish
>stomach ache along with inability to even drink a few sips of water for next 24 hours
It was fucking miserable, no idea what caused it since I didn't eat anything out of the ordinary in prior 24 hours, couldn't have been the sushi since it was too close to when symptoms hit and everyone else I ate with felt fine
>>
>>9257483
Leftover turkey casserole when I got home from college for Christmas break.

My parents and I all got awful food poisoning. In a house with one bathroom. So much vomiting and diarrhea. I can't even begin to guess how much weight we lost between the three of us that day.

Thankfully it took longer to hit me than my parents. They'd already been through that worst first wave when I got really ill. And I bounced back a lot faster, too.

Still. That was fucking miserable.
>>
>>9257483
i was in frankfurt germoney it was some sort of "apfelwein" event where there were a bunch of stands selling cider and various sausages in a square near an old cathedral, anyway i had four pints of random ciders and a tiny tray of currywurst and it was briefly amazing but then at about 1am as i got bored and started wandering around the city i began feeling the urge to shit myself and i kept trying to find somewhere i could go but couldn't find anything then as i was crossing this street in front of this park that had a shitty statue of the logo for the euro i let out this really wet shart and it completely ruined my undies and shorts...

i started going back to my hotel as quickly as i could and then facing my ass to the wall whenever i got to a traffic light or anything then when i got to my hotel i went up to my room but my key wouldn't work on my door and i spent about four minutes inserting then removing my key but it didn't do anything so then i ran out to the street then went to this lebanese restaurant a few doors down and just ran by everyone and went to the bathrooms but the mens' room door was locked for some reason so i kicked open the ladies' room and went into a toilet stall and yanked down my shitstained pants and spewed chunky brown soup literally all over the entire stall, the floor, the toilet bowl, the underside and the top of the toilet seat...my pants and undies were so saturated in shit that i left them in the sink in the german lebanese girls' bathroom and i ran out of the restroom area with no pants on acting like i knew where i was going and i got a few weird glares but otherwise just went back to my hotel and asked for a new room key and they were like "yeah your cell phone speaker magnet ruins the data on the magstrip on our keys"
>>
>>9257483
I'm 31 years old and have never had food-borne illness. I've never even experienced diarrhea from Taco Bell like all of the memes claim people do.
>>
File: superlative vomit.jpg (27KB, 640x795px) Image search: [Google]
superlative vomit.jpg
27KB, 640x795px
>9 years old
>eat KFC popcorn chicken for the first time
>my tiny self eats an entire box
>wake up in the middle of the night very sick
>run for the toilet
>don't make it
>throw up all over the bathroom floor

As a bonus, the first time my friend ate popcorn chicken was in a movie theatre right before we went in to watch District 9. Shortly before the movie ended he motioned for my popcorn bag, and I gave it to him thinking he wanted to share some. Threw up in the bag. I guess you need to build up an immunity.
>>
File: waa.gif (93KB, 300x200px) Image search: [Google]
waa.gif
93KB, 300x200px
>>9257483
I bought some fiorucci brand panino snacks that were just pepperoni wrapped around a stick of mozzarella, and while they tasted alright the aftertaste of the mozzarella would NOT leave my mouth. It kept getting stronger and stronger whenever I ate another one until I fucking blasted out vomit the next day after eating one of the fuckers. Now all mozzarella makes me feel sort of ill if it hasn't been cooked in some way.
>>
>>9258032
I never understood those memes. I have also never experienced gastrointestinal issues stemming from Taco Bell food.
>>
File: heyyyycon.jpg (22KB, 500x332px) Image search: [Google]
heyyyycon.jpg
22KB, 500x332px
>>9257969
The olive oil isn't what got you sick, dumbass. It was either the nasty old vegetables you used or the chicken juice from when your disgusting roommate didn't clean the cutting board.
>>
I drank a liter of milk once because I was too lazy to go out and buy food. It was the only thing I had for the day.
I had diarrhea that night and my body was too fucking weak, my hands started shaking and shit because I didn't eat anything I had to call my brother to get some food for me.
Living in rural third world country is difficult. I wish we had more 7 eleven or something like that. The closest 24 hour convenient store is 45 minutes away.
>>
My dad had really bad seafod poisoning while in Hong Kong and i had a Strawberry milkshake at some Sandwich place that gave me the runs for a few hours.
>>
>>9258110
It was bad olive oil. Fourth pressing after everyone else has had their fun with the olives.
>>
I got campylobacter from some chicken and was shitting every 10 minutes or so for 4 days. It was the worst experience in my life.
>>
>>9258173
A liter of milk is an acceptable meal though, at least for me. That's a strange reaction, I do this often out of laziness and always just feel hungry later that night.

t. semi-rural American
>>
>>9258249
Im asian and we're not that lactose tolerant compared to white people so maybe thats why.
>>
i got sick a few weeks ago eating at the Chipotle in Sterling VA
>>
>>9258299
>Chipotle
Don't eat there, you're asking to get sick.
>>
Family reunion veggie tray. Relatives washed the veggies with well water. Septic drained right into the well. E coli nailed 20 people at least. I lost 10 lbs in less that 24 hours. I shit a little on my bed. Wife still laughs at me about that.
>>
>>9258299
>>9258316
I eat chipotle more than i should.. I'm constantly wondering when it'll be my time..
>>
I used to eat a lotta sushi during my first College semester, ended up going to bed sooner than I thought. Should've watched my raw fish intake!

hah..ha.
>>
Ate some street food in Morocco. Spent 3 days on the shitter in a hostel in Marrakech with water leaking out of my ass about as fast as I could drink it. I understand how people die from diarrhea now.
>>
>>9257906
It was cool to see all the crazy sites. Burj Khalifa, Burj Al-Arab, the palm tree islands, indoor skiing, camel racing, more luxury cars than you can ever imagine and air conditioned bus stops to name a few. But I prefer to poop logs. The way I see it, my body rejected the environment. I"ll never go back.
>>
File: sad polar bear.png (679KB, 900x534px) Image search: [Google]
sad polar bear.png
679KB, 900x534px
Was anybody else unable to eat a type of food after a particularly bad food poisoning incident?

When I was 9 or so I got food poisoning that had me shitting and vomiting at the same time, when it first struck I was not ready for it, I needed to vomit so I kneeled in front of the toilet and started vomiting and shat on the floor, I didn't even know it was possible to come out both ends.

ever since then I can't eat strawberries because I had strawberries at lunch, even though I know it was the fish at dinner that did it. Strawberries just make me feel sick immediately.
>>
>>9258016
Is everyone gonna ignore this street shitter?
>>
File: received_561256067598054.jpg (113KB, 1152x2048px) Image search: [Google]
received_561256067598054.jpg
113KB, 1152x2048px
>>9259425
Indoor skiing. Awesome
But true, the climate would be shit. Guess I won't be getting myself a Dubai sugar daddy then :/
>>
>>9257483

Norwalk. No clue how I got it, I guess some pajeet got his shit-hands on my lettuce or something. Only lasted a day but it was fucking horrible. Shit and puke, shit and puke, non-stop. If I moved an inch or spoke a word -> puke. Even if I had nothing in my stomach. So when I was fully drained of liquid in my stomach I'd still be "puking", and have those gut-wrenching pains of trying to puke with nothing in there.
>>
my grandfather made me bleed out my ass with some strange sauce
>>
Puked after eating a can of peas ad a kid.
Puked another time years later, I blame milkyway bar.
>>
>>9259508
I had bad stomach pains after my first time swallowing semen. Turns out my husband still had some goo on his junk when we made love after that bit of foreplay and it got me pregnant. My kid is about 3 now God bless.
>>
>3rd grade
>Christmas eve
>At a family party
>Aunt has some sugar cane with her
>Like, raw sugar cane
>"Anon try this!"
>Okay!
>Hmmm, it tastes kinda funny
>Feel progressively worse as the night goes on
>Tell mom and dad I feel sick in the car
>Come home and start vomiting
>But it is not over
>Spend my entire Christmas eve puking my guts out
>Puking so hard it physically hurt to breath
>Crying because it hurt so much because I'd been doing it so violently all night
>By this point it's coming from my nose and can't breathe
>Subsides just as dawn breaks

Worst fucking night of my life. I probably should have gone to the hospital
>>
File: SkiDubai1.jpg (69KB, 550x366px) Image search: [Google]
SkiDubai1.jpg
69KB, 550x366px
>>9259560
The indoor skiing was a cool novelty but pretty shitty desu. Smaller than a bunny slope and it was more like hard packed ice than snow. Forget about fine powder. Still, it was funny to see the rich posers decked out in top of the line ski gear.

For half the price, I went sledding and threw a couple of snowballs.
>>
>>9257483
>Lived in southern Italy a good part of my life
>Raw shellfish is really popular
>Eat it all the time
>Friend's restaurant gets a shipment of mussels
>Hear they're a little dangerous to eat raw
>Say "fuck it"
>They were delicious
>Go to the gym after
>On the walk back home start feeling a little nauseated
>Think I just overdid it at the gym
>By the time I get home, feel like I'm about to burst at both ends
>Plop my ass on the toilet and shit diarrhea while vomiting into a trash can
>Literally at the same time, thought it only happened in movies
>After the shit, the nausea never went away
>Kept throwing up every half hour or so
>Gave up and laid face-down on the edge of my bed with a trash can under my face
>Continue throwing up every half hour
>This lasts through the night, no sleep
>Vomit eventually turns to dry heaving
>There's nothing left
>Try drinking water
>Throw it up
>Next thing I know, it's morning
>Still heaving
>This lasts for 2 days total
>Trying to drink water, or down some food only to throw it up immediately and continue dry heaving
>Finally starts subsiding late into the second night
>Still nauseated, but finally fall asleep at 4:00AM with my head still in a trash can
>Wake up with stomach still feeling like shit, but not enough to throw up or dry heave anymore
>Looked at myself in the bathroom mirror
>Look like a fucking pale mess
>My eyes look like they are almost glowing neon green
>Realize I haven't eaten or drank anything in 2 days and detoxed all the melanin from my eyes
>Haven't touched raw shellfish since
>It's been almost 7 years
>>
File: 1449105755605.png (525KB, 1106x1012px) Image search: [Google]
1449105755605.png
525KB, 1106x1012px
I had food poisoning a few weeks ago. Spent the night puking and shitting.

It's weird because I ate the exact same thing as my dad that day, and so not sure where I got it from. I read that maybe immune systems can be different.

I suspect it was my dads chili that we had been reheating during the week. He makes it on Sunday and then we eat it for lunch like Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. Then we take it to work (we work at the same place).

I think maybe by Wednesday I should have thrown it out.

How long should chili keep?
>>
>>9259887
Statistically the most likely (by far) cause of food poisoning comes from the eater him/herself not washing their hands properly.

>>maybe immune systems can be different.
That's not a "maybe". OFC different people have different immune systems.

>>How long should chili keep?
That depends on a ton of different variables, the most important being what temperature your fridge is set to. Below 3 degrees C will keep food much longer than above 3 C. But I've routinely made chili on a weekend and then eaten it throughout a whole week and never had a problem. (Same applied to my roomates who also ate the same chili). Same for stews, soups, and all sorts of other things.
>>
>>9259902
I'm such a germaphobe that hands seems highly unlikely. My dad isn't great with food hygiene though. I routinely see him handle meat, then just hose his hands off in the sink (not wash them), wipe his hands on a dish towel he'll likely reuse, then go about the rest of the cooking opening cabinets and shit.
>>
>>9259921
>I'm such a germaphobe that hands seems highly unlikely

That could explain why you got food poisoning though. If you're a germaphobe who irrationally limits his exposure then that in and out of itself could make your immune system weaker than others.
>>
>>9259981
You might be right. :o(
>>
>>9258016
Fine story bro.
>>
>be me, be 16
>go to local wing place
>be badass
"Lemme get the hottest ones you have"
>Mouth is burning and I've got snot coming out
>Feels good man
>Get home, everything's cool, eventually go to bed
>Wake up with the strongest urge to shit
>Run to bathroom and proceed to blow up the toilet
>Feels bad man
>Drink some water, go back to bed. 10 minutes later gotta shit again
>This happens like 3 or 4 times
>Towards the end of it, my body starts expelling those hot wings
>Asshole is red hot, like hemorrhoids on chili night times 100
>Go to wipe and look because, fuck it how bad can it be?
>Toilet paper is covered in blood
"Dear god what have I done"
>I proceeded to shit spicy hot blood for the next 10 minutes
>Finally hit a point where I should be fine, just gotta get some sleep
>Woke up to shit in my pants

I proceeded to shit pure silt for about a week after that. Since then I've never had the spiciest thing I can get on a menu and I'm always super wary of chicken dishes as that is not the first or last time I've gotten sick off chicken.
>>
>>9260025
>>Drink some water
Speaking of which. What is the official way to treat yourself when you are having a toilet-bombathon?
- drink water?
- eat something like fruit?
- eat something with fiber?
- active coal?

Going to "Paris" in a few weeks, cuisine might be unfamiliar to my stomach. Poopstorm could occurr.
>>
>>9260054
If it's liquid, I always hit the water, just to avoid dehydration. Fruit might be good, just cause it has fiber and water, but I've never tried it. Guess it depends on how my stomach felt.
>>
>>9260054
It depends, if it's bad enough to the point where it's going to start dehydrating you then you should try to take something like Pepto or just remember BRAT - bananas, rice, applesauce, toast. Otherwise you should just try to stay hydrated with something that has electrolytes (probably better to get something for kids like Pedialyte, it has less sugar than Gatorade) and let it happen since diarrhea is your body trying to get rid of something bad.
>>
>>9260054
Drinking a lot of water is standard procedure when you have diarrhea for any reason. You need to replenish lost fluids.

Eat some simple foods that you can keep down. Doctors commonly recommend the "BRAT" diet if you are sick and having trouble with vomiting or shitstorms. Bananas, Rice, Applesauce, Toast.

>>traveling in a few weeks
Talk to your doctor. Tell them you'll be travelling soon and are worried about traveler's diarrhea and get their advice. You can get a prescription for medication that you can use if you do end up getting sick.
>>
File: 1292639687072.jpg (48KB, 600x557px) Image search: [Google]
1292639687072.jpg
48KB, 600x557px
>>9260080
>>9260085
These are super helpful, thanks

Idk if I have a weak stomach, or maybe I'm just unlucky/careless about what goes into my body, but I have a lot of these stories.

>go to some goth store that opened up by my house
>oh look they have tea
>ask if they have any chamomile
>goth chick shows me a tea in a black paper bag labeled "digestive aid"
>made with fennel, chamomile, and other mystery herbs
>sounds perfect
>make a big ol mug next time I need to sleep
>suddenly my stomach starts hurting
>familiar waves of pain
>uh oh
>try to sleep through it
>not gonna happen
>rummage through cabinet looking for antacids/pepto/anything
>nothing
>fuck
>drive to CVS, in so much pain
>stomach is in boxing match with the rest of my body
>grab the medicine, start drinking while I rush the fuck out the store
>pain keeps getting worse
>driving back, can't take it anymore
>pull over on the side of the main road at like 4am, puke guts out
>goth bitch must've fucking cursed the tea or some shit
>lay in the fetal position on the asphalt next to my vomit until I can get my strength back to drive home
>vomit-induced headaches the rest of the night

Was not a fun night
>>
>>9257980
I was thinking sour creme because it is easy to miss-handle dairy between the farm and the refrigerator under their counter. But also the chicken chunks are very possible.
>>
One time I had a taco and fucking sneezed.
>>
File: IMG_9036.jpg (34KB, 548x427px) Image search: [Google]
IMG_9036.jpg
34KB, 548x427px
>>9258200
>>
>>9257483
>be onnajob driving some old senile lunatic to his asylum
>its atleast 2 hours away from where we're stationed
>still have time before shift is over, decide to eat some lunch and then call it a day
>NOTHING in the vicinity except for a gas station
>get some fries and some sausage
>feels gud
>drive home from work 3 hours later
>feel a rumbling in my stomach
>fuck it its nothing
>eat dinner, sit down to shitpost
>eat some nougat&salt covered pretzels since they were a gift from the netherlands and i wanted to try them
>they're fucking disgusting
>start feeling worse decide to go to sleep
>wake up at 3am and try to vomit
>doesnt work
>run to the toilet every 10 minutes until i finally let it all out
>sit in the shower and get back to bed
>be sick for the next 5 days, not vomiting but pissing blood instead
>still get sick when i think about those pretzels
Who the fuck combines nougat with salt. I can still smell and taste them right now and i can feel my stomach turning inside out.
>>
>>9259839
We have one of those in germany.
It sucks.
Getting that icy "snow" anywhere on your skin fucking hurts.
>>
>>9258299
Sterling? Happened to me in Richmond a few months ago.
>>
>>9261971
It happened to me in Harrisonburg last week.
>>
>>9261977
>Harrisonburg

JMU? Don't y'all have a Moes around there?
>>
>>9261991
I work in Luray but I head to Harrisonburg on business sometimes. The Moe's is stupidly overpriced. Talking $4 more than Chipotle for a bowl.
>>
Right up front, I want to make something completely clear: I'm not a stupid man. I understand that opening with that statement will probably lead everyone to believe the opposite, but I want to be frank here. I am incurably and abysmally lazy, with exception of being moved by my passions to dive headfirst into my hobbies.

Keeping this in mind, I'll tell you about an event that took place in 2007. I was in the military, stationed overseas in Japan. The on-base restaurants included a Taco Bell, and I enjoyed the generic "chicken burrito". I would routinely get two of them, eating one while saving the other for later. One Wednesday afternoon I did this, and left the second burrito sitting on top of the refrigerator. Yes. It was less than a two foot vertical drop to a place were it could have been preserved for proper consumption, but I simply didn't care to put it there. Fight me about it.

So when I woke up on Saturday morning, I didn't feel like going to the chow hall or going out to buy breakfast. Why should I? There was a burrito right there on top of my fridge.

I knew what I was doing. I knew it would probably be the worst decision I made that month. I did not care. The food was there, it still tasted great, and I didn't even need to open the fucking fridge.
>>
>>9262008
Within one hour's time I felt the churning begin. Within three hours more, my ass was parked on the toilet with a bucket between my legs. Twelve hours later, I was laying on the bathroom floor, the fluids drained from my digestive tract, and the strength drained from my body to the point where I was unable to raise my arm above my head. I have never been so weak in my entire conscious life.

It so happens that my roommate was on duty that weekend, meaning he would not have come in to see this happening to me. I was grateful for that, but the idea passed through my head, "what if I just die here, and no one would even know until a day or so later."

Within 26 hours after ingesting the poison that would ruin my weekend, I was able to stand without wobbling about. I actually felt relatively normal, like I had gone on a really bad bender two nights before and this was the hang over from a hang-over. By Monday morning I was ready to do anything required of me.

Would I do this again? No. I may be lazy but I am not stupid. I simply played the odds and lost this time. Don't pretend that you have never done the same. Am I glad it happened? I think I am, strangely enough. I think everyone who is able to survive it should experience food poisoning at least once in their life. It is a non-mundane experience of life, and I think we all should have as many of those as possible to help balance out the routine that we all so readily get trapped into in our daily lives.
>>
File: 1459499540862.jpg (99KB, 858x622px) Image search: [Google]
1459499540862.jpg
99KB, 858x622px
>Jack Scalfani made a video on how to can botulism and took it down, but some anon who doesn't close his tabs had the whole video loaded and then recorded and uploaded it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5f9d3m35VU

/ck/ used to be a fun place.
>>
>>9262016
/ck/ was a million times better when Joey and Jack threads were around. It actually motivated me to make OC and contribute to this place.
>>
>>9257993
Food poisoning hits pretty quick tho...
>>
Ate some bad shrimp from a restaurant in Galveston.

I was sick for a week straight and if i stood up even for a second i was puking my guts out
>>
File: 1501581419874.jpg (5KB, 201x200px) Image search: [Google]
1501581419874.jpg
5KB, 201x200px
>>9260196
>goth bitch must've fucking cursed the tea or some shit
>>
>>9258654
When were you in Marrakech? I was there last year but never got the chance to really try any of the food because of the workload during the stay
>>
>>9257551
>Went on every 30 minutes for 2 days.
how much did you eat?
>>
>be kid, don't remember how old
>dad made spaghetti bolognese
>i fucking LOVE spaghetti bolognese
>wake up in the middle of the night
>barely sit up before puking all over my bed
Probably some bad meat. I still love bolognese.

Tried the puke/shit combo, but I don't remember what I ate. Might not even have been food poisoning
>>
One day about 5 years ago I got the worst pain in my stomach and I needed to shit. I sat on the toilet for 5 hours in intense pain and shitting out rancid smelling brown water. Gallons of it. Every 10 minutes another torrent of water. I almost took flight from the force. I also had rancid sour sulfur burps. The burps tasted so bad I almost vomited. Eggy, sulfuric and rancid.

This has happened to me in intervals of 3-6 months since, but not in the last year. The pain has gone down considerably, but about 5 hours before the diarrhea starts I will get those sulfur burps that signal the next 12 hours I will need to be near a toilet. I track my diet prior to an incident and there nothing specific that seems to cause it. I know that dairy makes it worse. If I eat dairy close to an incident, it is much much worse, but I eat dairy all the time and am fine.

Anyone know what this is?
>>
>>9262641
aids
>>
>>9262641
Sounds like a bacterial or parasitic infection.

You have something living and reproducing in your intestines.
>>
>>9262791
If it hasn't happened in a year, is it gone?
>>
>>9262641
are you me?
>>
>>9262870
Yes.
>>
File: disgust.png (293KB, 600x322px) Image search: [Google]
disgust.png
293KB, 600x322px
I went to a boarding high school, and it was a small school of about 250 kids total with only like 30 or 40 in the boarding house. I'm vegetarian (no bully pls) and at one stage I was the only one out of all the boarders. This of course meant that the kitchen staff would have to make one thing just for me for most dinners.

The food was pretty good for the most part, but one night they made me this lentil curry type dish with rice, and it gave me the worst food poisoning. I woke up middle of the night and filled up the bin in my room twice puking violently. Eventually it settled and I went back to sleep for a bit, only to wake up in the morning and puke a bunch more.

For the rest of the day all I was capable of doing was lying down and slowly sipping gatorade, and it took me another day or two to feel completely better.

The funny part is I remember the curry tasting pretty good when I ate it, but afterwards (and even now after years) just smelling anything similar to that dish makes me feel queasy. God it was awful.
>>
>>9262827
Shit out any tapeworms lately?
>>
>>9257969
Vegetables literally grown in shit. Someone didn't wash them enough.
>>
>>9262921
I don't look at my poops. I haven't been extremely hungry and I didn't lose much weight so it isn't that.
>>
>>9257483
I used to work at McDonolds

>Late last year
>Me and a few friends are closing
>We hate this place and the customers are the worst
>I began spitting on burgers
>depending on the customers attitude they got one or more of my sneaky special ingredients
>this is an inside joke
>we almost get caught coughing up snot and spitting it into burgers a few times
>Laughing like hyenas when the regular fat assholes roll up
>Literally grinding my shart into the bun more than once
>cover it with ketchup
>heaping teaspoon size smear of shit on the bun
>I'm grinning like the joker
>Cheeks in pain
>Giving him the burger before he pays makes him stoked as fuck
>He usually is digging into the bag before he leaves

We still roll by and make a fish hook gesture to the homies. I don't even eat there anymore.
>>
File: Pink slime.gif (56KB, 1200x720px) Image search: [Google]
Pink slime.gif
56KB, 1200x720px
>>9262916
I used to eat at Jack in the box often. Three or four times per month. I went there one night and I shit you not there were fifteen people in line inside. I usually eat inside. Went through the drive through and ordered. Ate half of the burger when I got home and woke up with the worst headache..... I went to shower but as soon as I sat up my stomach felt like a big gass bubble. Ran to the bathroom and poofed a huge fart. Ten minutes later in the shower I am dry heaving stomach acid and sharting because I am already in the shower. Pounding head ache for a few hours after.

I don't eat fast food anymore.
>>
>>9262641
Parasites.

Eat an entire papaya(swallow all the seeds) every day for a week. It will kill the worms.

You could start drinking fresh green juices to. The alkaline juice works great.
>>
in mexico eating tacos at some small restaurant down the street of grandparents address. tacos good, certain meat taste weird. Get home, start puking like an M-rated cartoon.
>>
>>9262977
It hasn't happened for a year but I will try this if it comes back. It's weird though because in the last 6 months I have been eating very healthy and natural, but the six months before that I was literally eating frozen processed crap for every meal for poverty reasons. During this year I had no symptoms. So diet doesn't seem to be a factor.
>>
>>9262994
Diet is definitely a factor. Parasites don't enjoy your body when you are eating an alkaline diet.
>>
>>9257483
>Buy a coffee for my dad as payment for a lift into work
>he says it tastes funny and doesn't want it
>wtf gimme this shit
>I never drink coffee but thought I could taste something weird too
>throw it out
>finish day at work
>catch bus home
>get halfway home
>fall to knees and vomit out my chicken curry and can of soda I had
>this happens twice more along the way, vomiting bile the third time
>get home, go to bed and curl into a ball and cry
>have vomits, diarrhea and a blazing fever for 3 days
>wasted my weekend trying to prove my dad wrong

I either had an allergic reaction to the caffeine (has happened once before) or I their milk was off, but either way it was pain and torture and I wouldn't wish it upon anybody.
>>
>>9258016
>i let out this really wet shart and it completely ruined my undies and shorts...
You can take the American out of America, but you can't take America out of the american
>>
>>9257483
>about 5-6 years old
>go on 2 hour ferry ride with family
>vending machines on board
>Ask mother for money to buy something
>get chocolate milk
>tastes like fucking gas
>"mom this chocolate milk taste weird"
>"It's probably nothing son, drink up"
>reluctantly take a few more sips
>start feeling nauseous
>barf on the floor
>They have to fly a medical heli to the boat
>apparently the factory bottling the stuff had a malfunction and leaked machine lubricant
>bottle was nearly 2/3 lubricant

Felt like shit for a week afterwards but it was cool because I got to skip school, thanks mom.
>>
>>9257483
Bacchanal buffet in Vegas. After the mandatory gratuity, it was $73 a person, and I got food poisoned from the sushi.
>>
>>9259508
I had eggs and bacon a few years ago and got food poisoning from it, probably the eggs. For some reason I just wouldn't eat anything greasy for breakfast for a month or two.
>>
>>9262948
Dude....

I worked at Tacobell and my manager used to do some nasty shit to customers. Everybody on my shift was doing it. It was like our rite of passage. The trick is to make a few with spit, snot, shit, or whatever and set them to the side of the others. We were always quiet about it unless someone ate inside then we would watch to see if they noticed.

Only once did someone look inside the food but I think they were just picking something out.

I have tears in my eyes from laughing so hard right now. Fast food customers were the worst. I never do shit like that at my new job.
>>
I got a few
>Santa Barbara, CA
>meatball grinder from some "Italian" place
>start shitting my brains out a few hours later
>have to fly back home to East coast tomorrow morning
>5-6 hour flight while needing to constantly shit, stomach cramps ectect
>glued to toilet for the next 4 days
>pretty sure I had ecoli
also
>Santa Barbara CA a year later
>same area as that "Italian" place
>get burger at McDonalds
>eat it, go home, take nap
>wake up dripping in sweat
>get strep throat

Pretty sure I also got food poisoning yesterday after eating some shell fish (East Coast) been shitting liquid all day
>>
I ate out a chubby girl(she blew me afterwards) in the alleyway of a bar. She was drunk and had been dancing. We were positioned so my nose went into her ass for a while until we switched to a more traditional position. It was all very sweaty. She tasted very tangy. I'm sure some butt sweat mixed with watery poo and it dripped down into her crotch. I didn't care because I was drunk.

Anyway, 24 hours later I shit and vomited out the entire water contents of my body twice over and felt weak for two weeks. If I ate anything other than crackers and water I would get more ill. I fucked her twice after that but never went down on her.
>>
>>9257790
BECAUSE SOME OF US HAVE HIGH ENOUGH WATER BILLS. Thank you.
>>
>about 3 weeks ago
>eat greasy food for 4 days straight
>get some buffalo wings or something spicy (can't even remember now)
>stomach feels like shit that night but I take some Tums and try to sleep it off
>next morning before work I feel alright
>suddenly stomach starts piercing right after my shower and I have to sit on the toilet for 15 minutes
>end up having to use the toilet at work 20 times (not even actual shits, just stomach cramps) and it still continues through the next day
I'm giving up on fast food binging man, buffalo wings are still tasty though.
>>
>>9258110
>>9262938
It couldn't have been the vegetables though. I ate the same vegetables every day, and I only felt sick when I put olive oil on the veggies.
After feeling alright for a couple of days, I decided to try olive oil again, and I felt like I was going to have diarrhea again.
>>
>>9259508
After drinking so much I threw up, I couldn't drink anything for like 2 months.
I've gotten over it, but I still remember the taste of vomit when I looked at alcohol
>>
File: jerry.jpg (37KB, 530x392px) Image search: [Google]
jerry.jpg
37KB, 530x392px
>vacation with family
>they always do really greasy shit and arent always very sanitation heavy (something im trained in)
>get constipated followed by diarrhea, cant poop, but constantly leaking liquid shit
>have to have an enema and then shits for 30 min nonstop
>cautiously eating from now on
>>
>>9263146
>commiefornia
>>
>>9261847
>eating gas station food
You should know better
>>
>Family goes to Vegas
>Brother and his wife do a 10 hour road trip
>Mom, Dad, and I live 4 hours away
>One night we go to a Chinese place
>I don't eat since I wasn't hungry and my sister-in-law was napping in their room
>Later that night, mom and brother begin shitting liquid every 20 minutes
>Rooms stink of shit
>Eventually they get quarantined to my brother's room while my sister-in-law comes to our room
>They can't control their shits so they go through all of their underwear and some of our underwear
>It eases up for them the next day
>Suddenly sister-in-law and dad have it
>Brother and sister-in-law still have to drive the 10 hours

Nothing much happens after that, but I ended up getting it the next day and we all missed work for like 2 days afterwards.

We really can't figure out if it really was the Chinese place, but we have no idea what else could have done it. Is it possible for food poisoning to somehow spread to other people?
>>
>>9263238
>Is it possible for food poisoning to somehow spread to other people
I think maybe, I posted this story >>9262916 and the boarding supervisor who helped me in the middle of the night when I was sick said she got the same thing a couple days later and thought I gave her it

Not sure though
>>
>>9258032
I always shit about 4 hours after consuming taco bell, but I've never gone liquid
>>
>>9263238
>Is it possible for food poisoning to somehow spread to other people?
yeah, the likely culprit is some kind of pathogenic bacteria. you should know how easily those cunts spread and proliferate
>>
>>9262184
I don't think so, from everything I've heard it takes at least a few hours if not 24+ plus like I said I ate with a few people who had same things I had so I don't think that was it
>>
I eat too much spicy food but im immume to it. As in i taste slight pleasant spice while others are like damn this is too fucking spicy. Mah assholes always burning and probs have ibs but canced the doctor appointent bc i gotta make money.
Jist buy nausene tablets to get rid of the needing to throw up all the time feeling.
>>
>>9263455
Never post again.
>>
>>9258016
Ohhhh, I cringed imagining that. A nightmare of mine, to feel diarrhea coming on and have nowhere to go.
>>
>>9258249
Same here, I love few things more than milk. I'd drink 3 liters of chocolate milk a day if I wasn't such a fatass already. It might really be the tolerance (German here)
>>
Had some Thanksgiving leftovers. I literally almost died from an infection of the gut and had to take an ambulance after having a fire hydrant out of both ends for 18 straight hours. I will never look at green bean casserole the same way.
>>
>>9259508
Mushrooms. Fucking loved them as a kid. When I was 14, went on vacation to the Virgin Islands and I had eaten a dish that had shrimp and mushrooms in it. I got food poisoning and was on the eco-toilet for two days. One of those toilets that uses like a tablespoon of water per flush.
Now I know the shrimp is probably what made me sick but my brain says mushrooms mushrooms mushrooms and I just can't eat them anymore.
>>
Not food poisoning but instant food hate from experiences
>'12
>muhreen boot
>today's dinner main item is basically cheeseburger mac except orange
>exceedingly hot that day
>DI makes me eat every fucking bit
>should've been on triple rats but it wasn't a thing
>midway through eating that godawful mac
>stand up (there are 3 Bravo DI's there and that was before they pussified many different things as they are now)
>internally: AAAAAAAAAAAA
>externally: "good evening sir this recruit requests knowledge!" Hurr
>the one who hated me (god bless him) decides to be the one who gives me the time of day
>the fuck do you want
>this recruit needs to vomit sir!
>what?
>have to interrupt the other recruits' tasty meals by screaming THIS RECRUIT NEEDS TO VOMIT SIR
>get outside, you
>follows me out there as I'm both fast walking and alternating between puke faces and the best poker face I can manage
>imagine a 5th grader with spontaneous diarrhea of the mouth
>DI (he was a J hat by the way) tells me to assume push up position
>REALLY made me think
>PUKE RECRUIT
>blow chunks basically on the walkway
>screams the usual NO ONE CARES niceties as I'm voiding my precious life giving juicy nutrients which later hindered my run
>puke for a good minute straight
>WHY THE FUCK IS YOUR STOMACH RETARDED, YOU
>in between vomiting
>have to stand up
>THIS RECRUIT DOESN'T KNOW SIR
>resume vomiting
>puke also is entirely between my hands in this position, it's mostly just like how it was on my fucking tray except liquidy
>feel an awful horrid stomach pain the entire evening and the next day on haircut monday
>that goddamn italian barber
And I will NEVER eat orange cheeseburger mac again in my life. Thanks for listening please subscribe
>>
>>9259675
Recipe pls.

>>9264133
That sounds really stressful.
>>
File: 1500824746707.jpg (103KB, 750x862px) Image search: [Google]
1500824746707.jpg
103KB, 750x862px
>>9257483
When I was seven my grandparents got an ice cream making toy that made fudge pops and shit. It ended up giving me food poisoning and I was in a alternating state of shitting, vomiting in a bucket, and curled up on the couch in pains.
I tried to find the packaging for the toy, but I can't find it anywhere, so I assume it got discontinued almost immediately.
>>
>>9264147
That's the point my main man, but it's not stressful at all. It's just a three month equivalent of riding in the car with a child in the backseat who asks ARE WE THERE YET every 5 seconds except you have to scream NO SIR back and make yourself hoarse every time, and also the child is a 6'3" nearly anorexic man who never eats, has biceps larger than your service rifle and can snap your neck the moment you accidentally touch him during IT. And the car has no wheels and you have to ruck the thing to your destination.
It's really unique
>>
>>9264169
I'm glad your positive about it. I would crumble. Of course I'm mentally ill so there's that but I commend your mental fortitude. Thank you.
>>
As a kid, I had leftover cooked salmon, it must have been a day old. I thought it was disgusting and I didn't want to eat it but I was a little kid and my parents thought I was just being picky so I had to finish.

Puked nonstop for a day and a half, mercifully short, but to this day the taste of cooked salmon is abhorrent to me. I can't eat it at all. Raw is fine, in tartare or sushi or what have you, but as soon as it gets cooked it's inedible to me. I always wondered if it was common for people to have a bad experience with something and have it completely ruin their ability to have the food
>>
>out at dinner for friend's bday at new coopers alehouse
>we all eat together and share food
Suspect: garlic and cheese pizzas
Also plausible: salads/chicken (but some of those sick didn't eat these)
5/7 of our group up all through the night shitting and vomiting, I myself filled the hallway with a pile of vomit that I had to clean while holding shit and vomit

Happy birthday marcus
>>
>Couple years ago
>Driving back into town after a weekend trip with some friends
>Know that we're all be too tired to cook when we get home so decide to grab food while out
>Friend's recommends and some region chain Mexican restaurant
>Got pollo a la crema (chicken with a cream sauce and served in a tortilla) that came with rice, and grilled peppers, onions, and mushrooms
>Food was pretty good and went home
>Within an hour my stomach is churning and I can feel the storm coming
>Run into bathroom and spend at least 2-3 hours exploding from both ends
>It's like the fucking exorcist
>Vomiting so violently that it's coming out my nose
>Can feel chunks of partly digested food in my fucking nose and back of throat
>Makes me puke even more
>Get to the point where it feels like I'm puking up pure stomach acid
>Finally get it all out of my system and collapse into bed
>It takes almost an entire day before I get enough strength to get out of bed again

I don't know if it was the chicken, the sauce, or the mushrooms but I never went back to that place.
>>
Never ever ever ever eat without thoroughly washing your hands first. I don't know why something so basic is so commonly disregarded but damn, just wash your fucking hands.
>>
File: Divers11.jpg (59KB, 1200x630px) Image search: [Google]
Divers11.jpg
59KB, 1200x630px
>>9259508
Far more extreme, actually.

I got sick at 14, probably a bad combinaison of milk and olives or some kind of gastroenteritis that was spread at school.

I wasn't read either, and it was the first time i was sick like that and vomited in such a sporadic manner, so basically it was the perfect ground to create what a therapist would call a phobia.

Now i suffer from heavy emetophobia which is the fear of vomiting.

It goes so far that i simply refuse to eat outside or when i go in another country eat anything at all. So basically when i'm in holidays it usually mean one week or fasting or so. If i know that a colleague is sick i will simply refuse to go to work by fear of being contaminated. If i touch a door handle i will wash my hands with hospital grade disinfectant. If i need to go to the bathrooms outside of my home i will avoid touching anything with my hands and end up washing them anyway for about 10 minutes each. One winter i washed my hands so much they ended up so dry i was literally bleeding for every conceivable part of their skin, had to wear bandages like people with burn damage. I don't eat seafood anymore. I don't eat anything raw anymore. I get panic attacks when i smell anything that remotely smells like vomit. I don't take the plane anymore as it could mean nausea. I don't take the train anymore as it could mean nausea.

Life is difficult. Therapy as helped to an extent but i think i might carry this on my back for life.
>>
>>9264427
Needless to say now i don't consume milk anymore. No olives either.

You know the funny part ? Before that even i wasn't sensible to lactose. Now, ten years later, after extensive bloodtests i have a strong sensibility to it, like i can barely digest it.

Sometimes i wonder if a traumatic event, or something felt as traumatic, can create an intolerance or allergy. One may never know.
>>
File: botulism city.png (499KB, 388x520px) Image search: [Google]
botulism city.png
499KB, 388x520px
Not foodborne illness, but I spent a week doing nothing but puking when I was 12. I lost 25 pounds from a combination of puking every half hour and not eating. Eventually I took a probiotic and was pretty much fine (but really weak) almost instantly.
Good times.
>>
I got sick after I ate a soggy biscuit in a hotel in France.
>>
>>9264700
How did that happen?
>>
>>9258016
Durchfall
>>
>>9260054
I've seen some people recommend grapefruit seed extract when travelling. Put a few drops of it into a glass of water if you think you've eaten something risky.
>>
>>9257483
ate some bad mussels and spewed/shat my guts out for a few days
>>
Just got done throwing up a bunch of KFC.
>>
File: 1501880465192.jpg (80KB, 596x440px) Image search: [Google]
1501880465192.jpg
80KB, 596x440px
>>9262948
>>9263098
>fucking with food
what goes around comes around, you absolute blights on humanity
>>
>>9259887
>How long should chili keep?
Golden rule is 2 days. Buy some freezer containers or the kind of stand-up bag freezer ziplocs. Reheat one portion from the fridge the next day, and then after that it's sketchy unless you take it from the freezer. Who wants to eat the same thing that many days in a row? It'd be better to pull some portions out of the freezer in 3 weeks when you're in the mood again.
>>
>>9265579
What did you order lad?
>>
>be a kid
>have a wicked bad stomach ulcer that went on for way too long because my parents thought I was "faking a stomach ache to get out of school"
>finally get on anti-biotics
>go on vacation to a seaside resort
>not feeling like eating, stomach not all that great
>"lol too bad you're missing out anon!"
>stay in the hotel room and drink water
>every single person in the vacation group that went to the restaurant got horrific food poisoning, like 30 fucking people
>everybody except for me
>>
File: Screenshot_20170412-205426.jpg (413KB, 1417x838px) Image search: [Google]
Screenshot_20170412-205426.jpg
413KB, 1417x838px
>>9263098
You fucking mongoloid, I hope you die of dysentery
>>
>>9265790
you have shit parents
>>
>>9257557
The water in different parts of the world has different bacteria in it. If your body isn't familiar with any of it, your body will have to acclimate quickly. This means getting fuckin sick.
>>
File: 20170805_162403.jpg (872KB, 2048x1152px) Image search: [Google]
20170805_162403.jpg
872KB, 2048x1152px
Never had it.
>>
>>9259839
Posts like this in a thread about shitting your brains out are why I come back to this board. Thanks, I hope to take a trip like yours one day.
>>
I have a question about raw chicken. Im a prep cook and I cut the fat off chicken. It comes in a bag covered in juice, do I have to be extra careful with that? Like take off the gloves when I dink some thing or touch my phone?
>>
>Be week before starting college
>school is in San Francisco
>Fly out from New Jersey with my mom to LAX
>we go to my uncle's house in desert an hour or 2 from LA, to stay a few days before driving up
>My uncle and his partener (he's gay) just work and like to smoke weed and don't know shit about children or young adults
>they don't go to the store and I don't know where the fuck I am
>was 2010 so I didn't have a smart phone yet and couldn't just use maps to get to a store
>all I eat while I'm there are frozen burritos in the microwave and water because that's all they have that I like (very picky eater)
>on the last day leave and go to a 7/11 type place
>decide to get a fountain drink (something cherry flavored I think)
>start driving up I-5
>one long stretch of road and its all desert for several hours
>drink most of this fountain drink
>have to shit
>tell my mom
>"okay anon lets pull off and find a place when we can
>a couple minutes pass by and i feel my stomach drop
>evacuate_now.wmv
>"Mom I have to GO"
>but anon
>"PLEASE PULL OVER"
>mom pulls over
>reach in backseat and grab toilet paper from costco sized bundle I got for college
>run out into desert towards electrical tower, a bunch lined the highway
>I get to the concrete base and squat, supporting myself
>drop pants and shit
>all comes out in one long 10 second constant shit stream
>Feelsgoodman.jpeg
>wipe and throw TP on ground
>pull up pants and about to walk to car
>stop and turn to look at shit
>it's 3 different colors, like layers of rock that show age and erosion
>it's black, dark brown, and light brown
>Wesley Snipes, Dave Chapelle, Barack Obama
>Walk back to car and almost pass out was so dehydrated

I've never technically had food poisoning but that was pretty close imo
>>
>>9257483
2002.
I was 11.
Chef Boyardee's Ravioli.

I vomited for a week straight.
Worst food poisoning I've ever had.
>>
>>9260196
Most tea that claims to be a "digestive aid" or "bloat reducer" is actually intended to have a laxative effect. Teas labeled for "weight loss" or the Instagram FitTea actually usually contain senna, a very powerful natural laxative. That might have been in your tea because people react differently to it and can have very violent reactions.
Unfortunately it did literally nothing for me when I drank it trying to cut weight. If anyone reading this buys it, get the stuff actually labeled "senna tea" and not any of the branded weight loss stuff.
>>
My parents took me to Red Lobster when I was a kid, but I don't like seafood. I ended up ordering a hamburger and my dad was mad at me already for being that kid who orders a burger at Red Lobster. I took a few bites and it tasted like shit, didn't want anymore so my dad starts shouting at me in the middle of the restaurant. Finally he takes a bite and agrees it tastes like shit, then apologizes. I ended up with food poisoning the next day.
>>
>>9257483
>Spending vacation with my brother at grandma and grandpa's
>Grandad calls bro and me downstairs
>He bought a bunch of discounted Italian sausages at the store on the other side of town
>Fried them up, and we just ate sausages for lunch (Grandma was at work, so she was spared from the horror)
>Eat more than both Grandpa and brother

Fast forward 5 hours
>Grandpa isn't feeling too well, so we can just do whatever for dinner
>Brother also seems somewhat lethargic, and I'm not hungry either
>sudden_realization.gif
>Take a double dose of Pepto-Bismol and return to F-Zero, believing myself immune from the powers of the gods

3 hours later
>Slouched against bathtub, exhausted from spending the past hour holding myself over the toilet, dry heaving, and quietly begging for the sweet release of death
>"Maybe that's the worst of it," I think, naively
>Nope
>Urge to evacuate becomes much stronger than before
>Race back to the toilet and shove my head in the bowl just as the technicolor yawn begins
>Up comes the Pepto-Bismol
>Up comes the Italian sausage, which looks like burnt oatmeal and smells like leftover garlic shrimp that was pushed to the back of the fridge for a month
>Up comes a 1/4-digested slice of American cheese that I don't even remember eating

For the rest of the week, I felt cold, powerless, and tired.
Those were some tasy ass sausages, tho.
>>
>>9262016
What was it that they did wrong? I've canned stuff but never meat.
>>
>>9257483
Ate Chik-fil-a, got Norovirus. Basically felt like shit and threw up for 3 days and then completely lost my appetite for the following couple of months. I lost like 40 lbs.
>>
>>9266138
lol at your dad thinking Red Lobster was a place where you need to show off your sophisticated taste. Right on anon, make those fuckers whip a burger on the grill.
>>
Literally shat my pants after eating a poutine form "chez gaston" while going home on a bike but I also suspect an asian barmaid giving away shooters for free even thought I spilled that drink on the floor because I was completely wasted and it tasted horrible.
>>
>>9266160
>American cheese
Most disgusting part of the story desu
>>
>>9266598
There may be money in this.
In the past people have swallowed poisonous metal and tapeworm eggs to lose weight, if we could engineer a painless virus which had a controlled duration we'll be rich.
>>
Can't eat water chestnuts anymore after what happened to me when I was 14.

I remember it being rainy and dark outside, I was watching Dark Water because there was nothing else playing on HBO. Started to get hungry, but there weren't any snacks. I dug into the pantry and found a can of water chestnuts. I remembered liking the texture of them in stir frys, so I didn't see an issue eating water chestnuts straight from the can.
Well, about forty minutes later after eating them, I was puking and shitting my guts out. To this day, I avoid water chestnuts.

l also can't cook homemade chicken curry after I gave myself really bad food poisoning in 2014. It wasn't even that I was puking and shitting like I did with the chestnuts, but I had horrible gut pain that lasted for hours on end. I begged my spouse to go to the store to get Pepto, it hurt so god damn bad.
I can make pumpkin curry, beef curry, and green curry at home but I refuse to touch chicken curry ever again.
>>
>>9266807
I mean, it's gross from a gourmand's perspective but other than that it's pretty tasty. It's salty and "heavy" in the mouth. Goes well on burgers (inb4 Burgerland).
And yes, I understand that it's not real cheese.
>>
>>9265352
No clue. 0/10 wouldn't do again though, I seriously felt like I was going to die, and I was really weak for a week and a half afterwards.
>>
File: 1501574157666.jpg (108KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]
1501574157666.jpg
108KB, 1280x720px
>>9257483
Salmonella poisoning from something, possibly kombucha if that's possible. Pure liquid shit every 30-60 minutes for more than a week. I couldn't eat anything at all or I'd puke it up in minutes, even soup. I struggled to keep even water in my stomach.

The stomach pain was like nothing else I've ever experienced. I've shot myself with a framing nail, got hit in the nuts, and even hit my head hard on a sharp corner of a Granite table, but that couldn't compare to the stomach pains.

I only went to the hospital a week later when my toilet water turned blood red and my anus was dripping blood. Got prescribed antibiotics and vicodin which didn't last long enough to mask the pain.
>>
I don't even remember the last time I've gotten food poisoning.
I feel like people who eat fast food/gas station shit are simply underprepared. I ALWAYS have backup food in the car, usually in the form of peanuts/beef jerky in the glove box, along with bottled water and purification tablet under a towel in the backseat, to keep them cooler and out of direct sunlight. In addition to standard first aide/emergency equipment; blankets, jacks, spare tire, donut, tool box, etc.

Or, I simply just don't fucking eat. I guess once you've fasted for 14 days you have a different perspective on eating food. I don't even eat breakfast anymore, I'm just not hungry until late lunch/dinnertime, so I just eat one big meal at night. Your results may vary.
>>
>>9266046
>do i need to be careful with handling raw chicken
really staph infections my open sores, if you know what i mean ;)
>>
>>9259981
Yep. I'm not a particularly dirty guy, but I'm about the opposite of a germophobe--I bite my nails, prepare food on uncleaned tables, will rest my sandwich on my jeans (that get washed every 6 months or so), and so forth--and I haven't gotten food poisoning since I was a little kid, except for once incident with some shitty barbecue. Heck, I only even catch a cold once every couple of years. People were not made to be in as clean of an environment as some people try to put themselves in.
>>
>>9257557

Western culture has the highest standards of hygiene anywhere

The amount of Arab workers without gloves or antibacterial soap is scary
>>
>>9265763
Was just a couple of bits of chicken and fries.
>>
>>9262641
Are you... too poor to go see a fucking doctor?
>>
>>9257483
>I was about 10-11 years old, was with my family on a trip to Hawaii.
>Five day trip, going pretty good from what I remember.
>Fourth day we go to a touristy as shit luau.
>Got violent vomiting food poisoning that woke me up at 5am.
>Have to take these massive pills to deal with it.
>Didn't get to go snorkeling because of food poisoning.
>Sick all the way home.
>>
I had a goat cheese burger from some place I've never heard of before and by the end of the night it had twisted my stomach inside out.
Even after I had evacuated my bowels my stomach felt like it was imploding on myself and I didn't leave the toilet for a long time.
The burger wasn't even that good, the goat cheese over-powered the rest of the burger.
>>
>>9258284
what
a lot of Asian friends I know are lactose intolerant.
>>
The first full minute of this vid

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QvfmdByyFh0
>>
File: IMG_8976.gif (2MB, 217x217px) Image search: [Google]
IMG_8976.gif
2MB, 217x217px
>>9257483
>on holiday in all inclusive on Crete
>final night there
>me and ex gf doing a 69
>fingering her bumhole at whilst licking her puss
>suck my finger clean after pulling it out
>get extremely ill as soon as we land back hone
>liquid shits, vomiting, sweating non-stop
>off work for a week
>went to doctors and blamed the all inclusive buffet because of shame
>>
File: IMG_8871.gif (160KB, 220x220px) Image search: [Google]
IMG_8871.gif
160KB, 220x220px
>>9267659
Another story
>with same gf on Cyprus
>eat at an "Italian" restaurant on Kyrenia harbour
>have a brown shrimp cocktail for a starter
>you can tell none of the ingredients are fresh
>eat it all because drunk
>next day go back into town
>temperature 40c so not wearing underwear, just shorts
>walking past same restaurant
>try to tease out a tiny fart
>a pint of chunky liquid shit escapes
>tell gf to wait for me, run into restaurant
>walk past staff and go into toilet
>use a roll of tp to clean myself up
>leave it all over the floor as retribution
>make gf walk in front of me, luckily back of shirt is covering ass so people probably didn't see shit
>get a taxi back to villa to clean up
>broke up with gf about a month later

mfw, i hated that bitch
>>
>>9257483
when i was in 4th grade before school one morning i hate some of that sliced pineapple that comes in a plastic container it had been sitting in the back of the fridge for like two months
at school i vomited non-stop in the hallway on my way to the nurses' office enough to reach one wall to the next
>>
>>9262016
>there's a second retard on jack's wavelength
>>
>>9267672
>>9267659
>amerisharts
>>
>>9267780
Welsh actually
>>
>>9266430
I don't know but there was some comment about how the bottles weren't hot enough or something from some jarring expert
>>
File: 1464689538657.png (55KB, 820x286px) Image search: [Google]
1464689538657.png
55KB, 820x286px
>>9268138
>>9266430
>>
File: 1440960993373.png (442KB, 850x466px) Image search: [Google]
1440960993373.png
442KB, 850x466px
>>9264169
made me laugh, thank you
>>
>>9268159
Thanks, anon. Fucking kek.
>>
>>9257483
The worst food poisoning I ever got was from broccoli at a chinese take-out place. I know it was the broccoli because me and my dad got the same thing but he didn't eat the veggies. Anyways, I was throwing up so hard all night long that I did something to my diaphragm which made it extremely painful and difficult to breathe. Went to ER and they basically just put me to sleep, woke up fine.

All other times have been from eating raw fish. When will I learn.
>>
>>9257483
I don't actually get foodborne illness. My immune system is too strong so I had to go on helminth therapy (get worms so my immune system doesn't destroy my intestines instead). It's weird but I have to eat "dirtier" or less sterile food. Hopefully, I won't get the chrohns.
>>
>in the summer used to go to bw3s every Friday with friends
>one particular evening I ordered a grilled chicken sandwich and fries
>drank some beers and had a good time out with pals
>wake up before alarm goes off in the morning with horrible stomach pain
>duck walk to bathroom and sit down on throne, where I proceed to desicrate the porcelain kingdom
>immediately after shitting, have to throw up
>this goes back and forth multiple times over the coming hours
>parents think I'm just hungover at first but by the 3rd vomit/shit combo they know it's worse than that
>finally empty, fall back asleep
>wake up hours later, sip some ginger ale
>immediately start vomiting again, luckily no shits

It was awful. I later found out that four out of our group of eight had gotten the same joy that I had
>>
>>9264442
>>9264427
damn, anon, that's rough. hope things work out for you
>Sometimes i wonder if a traumatic event, or something felt as traumatic, can create an intolerance or allergy. One may never know.
i think i actually read somewhere, a while ago, that traumatic experiences can create pseudo-allergies. basically your body and brain react as if an allergic reaction is being triggered but you dont actually have the allergy, it's all just pathological. dunno, could be bullshit, my memory is trash.
>>
>>9264442
>Sometimes i wonder if a traumatic event, or something felt as traumatic, can create an intolerance or allergy. One may never know.

It's called taste aversion conditioning and it is the strongest type of conditioning. So cavemen don't kill themselves eating the same poison berries twice.

One may know, ask an educated person. That's what we're here for.
>>
>>9268237
Nerds are for bullying.
>>
>>9267553

That's literally what he said
>>
>>9257483
>celebration at work, salmon for dinner and plenty of drinks
>i partake heartily of both
>wake up at 6 am, feeling like Shane MacGowan looks
>first motion, things take a turn for the worse and i'm forced to quickly get up and run for the toilet
>blow chunks from both ends for a good while before i crawl back to bed exhausted
>i thought the demon was vanquished, it had only just begun

I spent six hours this way. When i was not puking like that goat in Futurama i was in bed whimpering with pain and nausea, Any movement i made risked more happy fun hugging the toilet time.

My stomach settled after i was completely empty, but that just gave the hangover free reign over my drained system. It was 2 days before i could see the light again.
>>
File: shane.jpg (35KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]
shane.jpg
35KB, 400x400px
>>9269444
forgot pic
>>
I've never had food poisoning, and reading threads terrifies me. I suppose I don't eat out a lot so my risk is low, but it seems like it's inevitable that it'll happen at least once in my life.
>>
File: a-ph.jpg (89KB, 600x600px) Image search: [Google]
a-ph.jpg
89KB, 600x600px
>>9262008
>>9262012
That's a great story but I'm pretty sure you are stupid, anon.

>>9264442
>Now, ten years later, after extensive bloodtests i have a strong sensibility to it, like i can barely digest it.
With some people, lactose intolerance kicks in as they age. My sister slowly stopped being able to handle dairy around her first year of college.

>>9266047
>Wesley Snipes, Dave Chapelle, Barack Obama
10/10

>>9264133
subscribed and thank you for your service :^)

My story isn't food poisoning, I just slammed 3 Mike's Hard Black Cherryies (that I bought for an underage friend who left them at my place) in 7 minutes then barfed them up a couple minutes later. At least it was either that or the curdled milk tea box i accidentally had a sip of earlier that day.

Only interesting thing about that is that it broke my 10+ year no puking streak. And that streak included all of high school and all of college. I ate out a lot, ate a lot of garbage, and drank a lot in those years and never once vomited. It was a kind of point of pride because I lasted through a nasty stomach bug that went around the freshman dorms, a taco bell eating contest, a 6-week antibiotics course, and a lot of supermarket sushi and fast food ice machines.

Before that 10 years, I puked a few times as a kid and I hated it. I was close to >>9264427 when I was 7 or so, in spite of never having anything like this thread's horror stories of days of vomit. But as it stopped happening, I stopped being afraid of it. Of course when I was hovering over a low-flo toilet horking up fizzy cherry liquid I remembered how unpleasant it is, like every vein in my head is about to pop.

I guess I need to slow down, I'm a mere mortal again.
>>
>extensive evening with friends
>we drink apfelwein - a special cider from Frankfurt/Germany
>is known for diarreah inducing, but hey we are used to it
>for some reason we are making mexican food
>everything is great
>a friend who was visiting cuba arrives
>she brings cigars
>obviously we drink scottish single malt with the cigars, we are no plebs
>2 hours later it starts
>people were crying on the toilet

it was just this fucking unholy mixture - and the amount of everything....
i still cringe at the thought
>>
File: unclepaul.jpg (13KB, 220x229px) Image search: [Google]
unclepaul.jpg
13KB, 220x229px
>15
>drove mom's minivan to first girlfriend's parent's house for supper
>first time I'm meeting the parents of the girl for whom I have depraved sexual intent
>awkward and nervous
>every word, gesture, and facial expression carefully calculated
>polite conversation, hollow but respectful
>as we sit down to eat I get a rumbly in my tumbly
>ignore
>one minute later
>even larger rumbly in my tumbly
>politely but nervously excuse myself to their hallway bathroom
>sit on the porcelain convenience for a strong 45 minutes
>girlfriend's mom comes to knock on the door a couple of times to make sure I'm okay
>punish the porcelain convenience as dirty Niagara falls comes pouring out of my ass every 3 1/2 minutes
>flush often
>eventually it's just water
>finally a lull in the madness and I wipe up
>surprisingly clean
>sweating like pic related in front of a jury as I exit the bathroom
>kitchen table has already been cleaned up as dinner has ended
>girlfriend's mom asks me if I'm still hungry
>politely decline and decide to head home very quickly and try to explain I'm not feeling well as sweat and shame drip from my brow
>girlfriend walks me out to mom's minivan and I give her a hug
>as I'm driving home I shit out a bit of water but since I'm home free I'm not concerned and decide to clean it up the next day
>>
File: astronaut.jpg (234KB, 640x1136px) Image search: [Google]
astronaut.jpg
234KB, 640x1136px
>>9259887
jealous that you get to work with your dad. i'm the whiney faggot that only sees mine once a year and has nothing much to talk about
>>
>>9263146
what's your pay pal, i'll send ya 30cents to cover a day's worth of flushes
>>
>>9270217
>I'm the whiney faggot that only sees mine once a year and has nothing much to talk about

Your relationship with your dad was already examined in "The Last Picture Show," when Sonny saw his dad at the school dance. McMurtry knew you before you were born.
>>
>>9264133
>triple rats
>Bravo DI
>J hat

cool story bro. All you needed to say was muhreen for anyone to know you're an uneducated faggot who tosses muh slang words around to sound cool
>>
File: 1486511878428.jpg (33KB, 478x644px) Image search: [Google]
1486511878428.jpg
33KB, 478x644px
A couple of summers ago I met a girl off a dating site who worked at Olive Garden.

>3rd date
>"Anon, how about I bring some food over after my shift and we have dinner at your place?"
>Sure, sounds good.
>Proceed to eat a mix of pasta, chicken, and practically every appetizer they had on the menu.
>1 hour later running to the bathroom every 10 minutes to piss out of my ass.
>Somehow managed to play it off and still got sex in the wee hours of the morning.
>Haven't been able to eat at OG since.
>>
>>9270304
The only thing worthwhile there is the breadsticks anyways
>>
I used to drive a truck cross country and once stopped at a rest stop that had a vending machine with a built in microwave. Good time to test out the vending machine burrito. I knew it was going to be shit because even the microwave burritos made at home are still cold in the middle. Needless to say I didn't make it very far before I had to stop and shit my brains out. I would try it again but not while driving
>>
literately two days ago I went to a tapenyaki house where they usually have a deal on sushi but they refused to serve me because of a new policy. So instead i had to eat some of the worst food in my life. The chicken and shrimp was clearly under done so I didnt eat it and just got fried rice. Course the fried rice was tainted or shit as Later that night i was having shit come out both ends. Turns out the waiter who was serving us was a dick and didnt want to deal with the sushi order so i got fucked cause some chink was mad. Fuck that restaurant
>>
>>9269932
You have a gift for entertaining greentexting
>>
Used to work in a bar/pub kitchen. My first cooking job, got hired as casual temp staff a few weeks before most of the kitchen staff was fired for not bothering to show up and/or work, abruptly bumping me to full-time-plus. My "kitchen training" amounted to "here's the ingredients, here's the recipe book, go figure it out". Proceeded to research cooking methods and standards on my own. Other staff got hired and trained, but they never got around to training me.

Later, *accidentally* found out that "food safety certification" was a thing I legally needed to work in a kitchen unsupervised, so I got that too (on my own). Not that management was worried - one of the DJs (who never worked in the kitchen) had their certificate, so they figured that counted, legally.

The kitchen cut its own fries, keeping the raw fries in buckets of water before cooking. I noticed that the buckets I cut kept nice clean water water for up to a day, but the water in the buckets other staff cut was brown, slightly frothy, and had a bunch of sludge in the bottom. Asked the manager, and it turned out, the "standard" was to not wash the potatoes before or after cutting, and to store the buckets next to the deep fryers (nice and warm!) for "convenience" during the shift. Because I was never "trained", I was "wasting time" washing the potatoes and storing the buckets in the walk-in between orders, like a clueless idiot.

Months later, working by myself, busy shift, skipped breakfast, no downtime to even think about a staff meal, super hungry. Made the mistake of eating two freshly-cooked french fries that hadn't made it onto a plate. Not two orders of fries, two fries.

About half an hour later, I had to close the kitchen, due to uncontrollably heaving up stomach acid like an angry xenomorph. Was driven home by one of the bar staff - had to take a small bucket in the car, which I continued to hurl into off-and-on for the next 36 hours.

"Perfectly safe, nothing to obsess over", the manager said.
>>
>>9270631
Thank you.
>>
File: Call of Fedora.jpg (50KB, 371x562px) Image search: [Google]
Call of Fedora.jpg
50KB, 371x562px
>>9270706
your story doesn't add up. the hot oil would have killed any pathogens in the fries you ate, so that could not have been the source of your "food poisoning"

also food poisoning doesn't work that quickly.

you are a liar and a fraud. I hope you neck yourself, mate
>>
>>9270856
That's pretty much what my manager told me, aside from your expressed interest in my suicide. Are you a kitchen manager, by any chance?

I didn't get any lab tests done, so I can't say for certain, but just for one possible example:

Staphylococcus aureus produces heat-stable toxins that can survive temperatures that would kill the bacteria itself, can cause illness in between 30 minutes and 6 hours, and grows well in a warm environment, such as a bucket at 95F for eight hours. Symptoms can also include vomiting and cramping, among others.

Source: https://www.cdc.gov/foodsafety/diseases/staphylococcal.html

you are deliberately ignorant and a tool. I hope you eat where I used to work, mate
>>
>>9260196
Was she hot?
>>
What does /ck/ think of Cooking with Jack?
>>
File: 1501965404069.jpg (286KB, 1024x683px) Image search: [Google]
1501965404069.jpg
286KB, 1024x683px
gave myself a caffeine overdose once.

>doing a graveyard shift
>feeling sleepy
>drink coffee and pop a few caffeine tablets
>2 hours later, still sleepy
>drink more coffee and pop more caffeine tabs
>start to feel sick
>drink water
>puke
>finish shift
>go to hospital
>puts me on two kinds of IVs and makes drink charcoal
>nothing works
>suffer for 2 weeks
>at least I lost like 12lbs from not eating

wew lads
>>
>Indonesia
>have some meal made by villagers
>diareah for 6 days straight
>>
>taco bell
>February 2002
>threw up in 3 different places in apartment carpet
>dry heaved every 20 minutes for the last 5 hours
>lost 11 pounds in 7 hours

never had taco bell again
>>
Ate burger king for the first time in years while on a train home - I was late and had no time for a proper lunch. The next morning I took an extremely painful dump. When it was over I climbed into the bathtub in a fetal position for an hour. I will never eat burger king again.
>>
>visiting China
>every time I go there my shits are ballistic

Praise food safety. USA #1.
>>
Not exactly foodborne illness, BUT I almost died

>lived in Mexico for almost 7 years
>move back to Cali to finish school
>gonna start 8th grade in a new school and new town
>it's Friday
>family's been moving all our shit back and forth for about 2-3 weeks
>finally finish, parents can now go about their business
>they go and find work, leave my sister and I at home with 20 bucks to eat
>taco bell across the street
>bring back food, I had only a taco and a burrito
>2 hours or so pass and I really don't feel well, stomach feels like its full of knots and cramped up
>think it's just a stomach ache, wait for mom to come home and get medicine
>an hour passes, I can't stand straight >stomach pain is unbelievably bad, can't even lay in bed straight, takes me 10 minutes just to crawl in bed
>mom comes home, thinks its just a stomach virus and gets me medicine
>Now it's Saturday
>wake up with excruciating pain
>whole body is cramped, can't stand straight or even walk
>require help to get out of bed and move
>no health insurance in the US yet, so we decide to drive across the border at night down to Rosarito where we used to live, just 30 minutes south of Tijuana, so I can get some affordable care

cont...
>>
>>9272065
>Saturday night
>we get to the red cross/cruz roja, a super cheap clinic
>it takes 2 of the nurses to pick me up and lay me down on the doctors checking bed
>they take x-rays, doctor applies pressure to various points on my stomach to check where the pain is coming from
>Mother believes it's appendicitis, doctors say it's probably just a stomach and DEFINITELY NOT the appendix
>if_only_he_knew.gif
>sets up an appointment for the lab on Monday, since the lab is closed on weekends
>I have to endure another 2 days of excruciating pain
>get prescribed some stomach pills, and we stay at my grandmothers for the night
>Sunday
>just a whole day of pain, pain, and more pain
>try eating, but I just throw it all up, even water won't stay down without wanting to come back up
>can't eat, can't shit and can't even piss
>Grandmother used to work at a hospital as an assistant, gives me some shot right in the ass cheek
>does nothing, now I'm crying because the pain is getting worse, whole body is giving up, can hardly move my arms and legs, can't even turn my head and still can't get into bed by myself

cont...
>>
>>9272065
>>9272076
If you have a long greentext you need to type it out in notepad first then start posting. It took you ten minutes to type out your second post and most people won't want to wait 20-30 minutes for a greentext.
>>
File: Dark-urine-liver-disease.jpg (60KB, 500x674px) Image search: [Google]
Dark-urine-liver-disease.jpg
60KB, 500x674px
>>9272076
>Monday afternoon
>head over to the lab for some tests
>pain is at it's peak, takes almost five minutes just to get from out of the car to the lab
>first thing they ask for is a piss sample before they do further test such as blood, physical etc..
>spend what feels like 10 minutes in the bathroom, barely even able to squeeze some piss out
>when I just about reach below the minimum amount they need for a sample, I look at my piss and it is only a few shade away from red
>pic related, probably just a bit darker though
>come out with the sample, apologizing to the lab tech for not being able to give her the full amount they need
>she's in shock as she sees my sample
>she tells us we need to head to the hospital immediately, that they don't even have to run anymore tests, that I need to go NOW
>she definitely knew something we didn't and she was told by my mom she thought it was appendicitis regardless what the doctors told us on Friday
>we get to the hospital which is fortunately just 5-7 minutes up the road
>nurses outside the building see my mother struggling to take me out of the car
>they run up to us with a wheelchair and take immediate care of us
>they took us to the front of the line, signed me in and waited no more than 5 minutes while my mother signed the paperwork
>two other nurses help put me on a stretcher, and at this point I can't move without crying and containing my scream
>5 minutes after finally getting on the stretcher, they take me in

cont...
>>
>>9272091
>on the stretcher outside a surgery room, waiting a while for something to happen
>they take me in, put the gas on me and ask me to count backward from 100
>I only remember getting to around 87 or so before knocking out
>wake up in a dark hallway
>lift my head up, see I'm full cloaked under a sheet
>look down the dark hall
>the only light on is at the very end, one of those long fluorescent lights that jingle and make noise and flicker
>it's the only sound I can hear
>"I died. This is it... I'm dead"
>Legitimately think I'm dead
>hear footsteps and some chatter, 2 nurses come up to my stretcher
>"thank god, holy shit. I'm not dead"
>nearly shit myself
>they take me in a large room with curtains separating the other peoples beds
>they take me to the last "room", which happened to be next to the window
>I knew I was alive at that point, as I saw the moon
>A full, bright, amazing moon. It was the most amazing thing I'd ever seen
>I cried, knowing it was over...
>until I saw a plastic tube, the end cut off, sticking out of my stomach, and layers of gauze on my lower stomach where they sewed me up
>yup, it was appendicitis, that fucker at the red cross didn't know shit
>3 days later, I'm out the hospital with only a $600 bill
>this sort of shit would have been roughly $30,000 in the US
>stayed in Mexico another 3 weeks for times I had to go back to the hospital for the stitching removal and cleaning

>>9272082
Oh well. There's the story.
>>
>>9267407
>The amount of Arab workers

It's worse than you imagine. The Arabs don't really work, especially not in pleb tier jobs like food service. Most of the Arabs "work" in the public sector. By "work" I mean they show up at 11, take their lunch and prayer breaks and leave by 3 and get paid $150k. It's basically welfare. The richest, most connected Arabs are nominal business owners. By nominal business owners I they are 51% partners with Westerners who come over to form international subsidiaries.

The population of the UAE is 1 million, consisting of 100k Arab citizens and 900k ex pat workers on visas. Half the ex pats are Westerners (mostly British) who come over to work for international corporations and are paid lavishly. The english language over there is British English (W.C., trainers, lift, etc). My hotel even had an English pub.

The other half of the ex pats are from the Indian subcontinent; Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, India, Pakistan, etc. They live in slave like conditions. They pay human traffickers to get there, have their passports confiscated, are crammed into shitty apartments, work in unsafe conditions, are paid shit and generally kept out of site. These are the people who work in food service. Gross
>>
>>9266037
The single worst part of my Dubai Trip:

>part of /biz/ school tour group
>spend our days on a bus, touring businesses
>spend nights partying
>new buildings being built left and right
>visit building materials recycling center
>literally a dump in the middle of desert
>Arab culture big on hospitality
>host offers to pick us up in their bus
>our bus was a giant, beautiful Mercedes-Benz
>theirs was a rickety shit box with no A/C used by the migrant laborers
>fans instead of A/C
>reach destination
>piles of concrete and steel rebar as far as the eye can see
>meet with hosts in tiny container office
>host offers us food
>rude to not eat offered food
>turkey and cheese sandwich
>ate it knowing it just wasn't right
>more liquid shits
>like how Buddha died
>>
>>9272111
I too have an apendicitis story
>go home to visit parents, stomach starts hurting
>go home, try to shit the pain out
>not working, parents leave me at home alone
>day 2, pain increasing, accept death, call parents
>go to a clinic, doctor feels my gut
>looks at my dad with the most serious expression i have ever seen
>"you need to go to the hospital right now"
>shit.jpg
>doc from the clinic called the hospital ahead of us, i was expected at the hospital
>go to hospital, get put in catscan machine twice
>it's apendicitis for sure
>surgery time, count back from 100
>i just remember looking at my family and passing out
>wake up, thirsty, hungry, need to do my uni work, high as fuck on opiates
>drink cran grape juice, it's amazing
>asking nurses for pens and paper while high, they deny
>left with 3 small scars
>hospital foots the bill because I'm a student
>surgery cost 16k before, payed 1k for room and drugs
>end up with a huge oxycodone perscription
>didn't need all the pills, only take like 4
>sell the rest for like 800 dollars
America
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iHwpcXznGxk
What a thread.
>>
>>9257483
Every time I visit my 'pa, he makes mussels and I end up sick later in the evening.
I'm sure his cheap ass bought the lowest quality mussels he could find.
>>
>>9272065
>>9272076
>>9272091
>>9272111
You could cut this down by at least half without losing anything important. How about you do that?
>>
>>9272164
Because it's already done.
How about you stop being a bitch about something you don't have to read?
-t. not the guy who posted that
>>
>>9257483
One time I had these random spicy Italian chicken meatballs that were in the freezer because there was nothing else in the house.

Next morning I wake up and my stomach feels absolutely wretched, my entire body aches, my bones feel like glass, and I have a monster headache. That alone I probably could have toughed out, but that wasn't the worst of it. What came then were the incessant, nauseating spicy chicken burps. They weren't even physically satisfying burps, it was like a tiny bit of rancid gas that would climb up and hang in my throat, and I'd have to wait until there was enough of it to pathetically expel it. The burps lasted for like 3 days. I wouldn't wish those burps on my worst enemy, and I still can't even think about chicken meatballs without feeling extremely nauseated.

But wait there's more. Since I was sick, I decided to skip the one class I had that day thinking it was no big deal. NOPE. I was supposed to take my midterm. So my two options were to take a much harder written version of the exam or just kill myself. I decided to keep on living and actually did massively well on the written exam. Even so, it was not pleasant to expend a lot of effort on studying whilst recovering and still dealing with my horrid spicy chicken burps.
>>
>ca.10 years ago
>vacation in Tunisia
>had a strawberry milkshake one evening
>woke up that night
>made it to the toilet and proceeded to vomit way more liquid than I thought a stomach could hold
>grabbed the stainless steel wastebasket in the room and placed it next to the bed
>poured my inner self into it throughout the whole night
>woke up and feel completely fine
>took a look into the abused bucket
>it's empty
>remembered that I had to use it 4 or 5 times the night
>grabbed it and gave it a swirl
>more than 1 litre of completely clear liquid swirls around
>almost like water only with slightly higher viscosity
I still have no idea what the hell was wrong with the milkshake.
>>
>>9272141
not trying to incriminate you or anything but how do you easily just push $800 worth of pills?
>>
>>9263238
yes, specially if the infected people keeps sharting his undies and spreading the bacteria everywhere
>>
File: image.jpg (11KB, 240x240px) Image search: [Google]
image.jpg
11KB, 240x240px
>eat KFC at lunch
>go about day normally
>wake up at like 2:30am with incredible stomach pain
>run to bathroom
>can't shit
>stomach hurts so bad I collapse onto the floor and my whole body is shaking
>try shitting multiple times but I can't
>after an hour of horrible pain I finally unleash the most explosive blast of diarrhea of my life
>its the most beautiful feeling ever
>I have never been closer to God in my life
>begin praising Jesus out loud in my bathroom at 3:30am then go to bed and immediately pass out
>>
>>9269731
but anon, puking is good for your body
>>
>>9272220
Not the guy you're replying to but he did mention uni so pushing $800 worth of pills is likely very easy. One, maybe two buyers tops
>>
>>9257483
Happened to a friend
>Eat chicken halfway through realize it's undercooked
>Tried to wash it down quickly with water
>Water tastes like sewage
>Almost throw up
>Doctor is closed so no real option
>Tried to eat something from the cantine
>Brownie was expired and basically not even chocolate anymore
>And That's how my friend avoided army food at all costs
>>
>In Peru
>It's dark
>My stomach starts claiming food
>"Alright, I'll get something traditional"
>Get a weird as shit sandwich in a food truck
>weird tasting meat, potatoes, spicy something, onions, peruvian things
>I don't even know what I ordered
>Eat anyways
Fast forward to 4AM
>Vomit 4 times in a row
>Diarrhea
>I barely can walk
>About to pass out
>I thought I was dying from food poisoning
>I pass out in the living room
Next morning
>The entire floor smells like vomit
>Dried vomit everywhere
>Bathroom full of diarrhea
I was just fine the morning after, but it was terrifying.
>>
>>9272111
I can't believe it took so much time to diagnose a fucking appendicitis.
>>
File: IMG_6463.jpg (26KB, 281x302px) Image search: [Google]
IMG_6463.jpg
26KB, 281x302px
>be me
>freshman in college
>have delicious Chinese food from gas station
>go to bed
>woke up at 3 am covered in sweat
>mfw it begins
>stumble to bathroom
>shit rockets and vomit into tub at same time
>this goes on for 2 hours
>literally passing clear greenish liquid
>roll into shower and let water run on me
>wake up at 6 am
>eat nothing but soup and water for a week

I think I developed Ibs from it
>>
>>9273431
>have delicious Chinese food from gas station

Fucking why.
>>
File: 1409893790875.gif (4KB, 256x272px) Image search: [Google]
1409893790875.gif
4KB, 256x272px
>>9257483
>get a kebab with a mate from kebab joint I've been to several times
>go shopping with my friend for a few hours after eating
>while we're shopping I feel my stomach starting to ache
>by the time I'm on my way home I'm having cold sweats and feeling nauseous
>get home, drink a glass of water and lay in bed thinking it might help
>it doesn't
>charge into the bathroom to throw up
>as I'm exerting energy to puke I feel the need to shit
>hold a bucket while sitting down shitting my bowels out while simultaneously throwing up everything and more in my stomach
>go back to laying in bed, feel like I've been hit by a train and like my body temperature had dropped by half
>constantly need to throw up so end up dry heaving because stomach is empty
>spend the next 36 hours in bed laying under several blankets
>sit up to throw up every 15 minutes, barely get any good sleep during said 36 hours
>mfw

Haven't had a kebab since. My entire upper body was sore for a week after the incident because of the violent stomach cramps I had while dry heaving. Fucking turks man.
>>
>>9273439
Because it was cheap
>>
>>9258102
are you European?

USA has shit safety standards
>>
>>9273790
Some of the safety standards cause more harm like requiring the wearing of gloves. Sure, if you change them every 30 seconds but that's impossible to do in a restaurant environment. I've literally seen fucks handling money with their gloves on and go back to handling food.
>>
>>9262948
screw off, dude. messing with people's food isn't cool. I genuinely hope you get a foodborne disease
>>
>>9273908

Gloves are stupid, im talking about control on the origin, production and transportation of edibles
>>
>>9257483
I got salmonella from McDonalds twice as a kid. Almost killed me.

That is a scary restaurant.
>>
>Get hired at a new place
>Start a week later, everybody in the kitchen got stomach flu except for the head chef
>Washing dishes and doing whatever else I can
>Start meeting my coworkers, starts getting better
>Get home, eat a fuck ton of rice with peppers and duck
>Start sweating and getting a headache, laying in my bed for a while
>About an hour later I feel the intense urge to spew my guts all over
>Get up to run to the bathroom, knees buckle, can't make it a foot without releasing the hounds
>Speaking of hounds my 9 week old pupper is chilling in his crate while I throw up pounds of undigested rice onto a puppy pad
>'hey chef not gonna make it tomorrow'
>Spend a week throwing up at least once an hour, taking my dog out every two hours, and eating nothing
>Can't stand it, drink orange juice, truly the elixir of life at that point
>Throw up three times as much as I managed to drink
>Lose 15 lbs despite floating above being underweight to begin with
>Lose a years progress of lifting and eating healthy
>Never bounce back, dental surgery a month or so later causing me to lose even more weight because liquid diet
I honestly think I would've needed to go to the hospital if I didn't have all those delicious nutrients for my body to feed on in those perilous days. If the same thing happened to me right now, I'd likely die. Good stuff, time to eat.
>>
>>9264214
> be around 9 or 10
>mom was making kebabs for dinner
>she never makes them so yaaay
>eat it
>wake up in the middle of night puking on pillow, puking on the floor
>never managed to go to bathroom
>drink water and puking for whole night and next day
>almost 15 years later cant eat kebabs
>>
>>9265991
Sometimes when i travel within my country i get light diarreha from water i don't know why maybe because of different water supplies
>>
>>9271833
boy that was REALLY stupid of you
>>
Did you guys tried anti-emetics in these situations ? Should help. On the paper.
>>
>>9266789
>No one makes poutine like Gaston
>Makes you shit yourself like Gaston
>>
>be 10 or something
>live in eastern europe
>everyone eats steaks well done here
>father tries to be fancy and grills rare steaks
>tasteless and barely chewable
>spend all night throwing up half digested raw meat pieces
Still can't understand how people like this shit, underdone meat is absolutely disgusting
>>
>>9277839
>barely chewable
You might just be trolling but I live in the USA and feel the same way. Well done steaks might technically be a bit drier but they also seem more tender. Less than well done has this chewy gelatinous texture that I find unpleasant, and it actually takes longer to chew and break down, even with high quality steaks.
>>
>>9277844
Yes, you described it perfectly, I wonder how many people will get triggered by this
>>
File: all.jpg (18KB, 299x275px) Image search: [Google]
all.jpg
18KB, 299x275px
>>9277864
>>
>>9277844
>chewy gelatinous texture
>high quality steaks
Pick one.

Any steak worthy of the name should never be "chewy and gelatinous", even totally raw. Those are the signs of low grade meat.
>>
>>9277877
Nah, nobody else had a problem with them. It's just my preference and what I would consider chewy since well done steaks seem to break apart easier when chewed even if they're a little drier. Someone who likes med-rare steaks would enjoy it but I'd still consider it chewy.
>>
>>9277890
>since well done steaks seem to break apart easier when chewed

This is why I know you're talking about relatively poor quality meat. With a good steak there would be no confusion whatsoever that mid-rare would be much more tender than well done.
>>
>>9277910
If you say so, but I think we're just disagreeing on what we consider "chewy" to be. I've been to good steakhouses and eaten with trained chefs who would love their med-rare steaks while I would consider it chewy and dislike it. It's just my preference.
>>
>>9257483
Having IBS in general. Idk what's going to mess me up but when it does.. I'm stuck on the toilet.. I'm considering vegetarianism just for this.
>>
>>9265790
my parents also didn't believe I had a problem with my knee for years and screamed at me when I brought it up, now i'm crippled at 28
>>
>>9277815
>Why is the moderation on /ck/ dead last on this website?
>he has never been to /f/
>>
>>9278333
/lit/ and /co/ have it pretty bad.
>>
For any of you delco fags out there I once got food poisoning from a Wawa hoagie.
>>
>>9276022
Brush your teeth.
>>
>>9278345
Lots of boards have bad moderation. Hell, probably most do. They do it for free after all.
>>
>>9278506
I think they just gave up on /pol/
half the god damn catalog is just shitposting
>>
I've never gotten a foodborne illness but then again i'm very paranoid about what I eat I wont even touch something if it smells even a little bit off
also lucky enough not to ever get it from a restaurant or fast food place
I should probably knock on wood
>>
>>9279245
Modern /pol/ is a textbook example of a containment board.
>>
>>9278431
Wisdom teeth
>>
>>9257483
>file deleted
holy fuck
is it what i think it is?
is /ck/ jack-free?
>>
>>9279301
your mom is a modern textbook example of taking dicks
>>
File: mre 4.jpg (130KB, 684x625px) Image search: [Google]
mre 4.jpg
130KB, 684x625px
>>9272082
>most people won't want to wait 20-30 minutes for a greentext.
Yes we will. Many of us use marvelous inventions such as thread tracker or multiple tabs.
Don't project your short attention span on us.

pic to stay ontopic-ish
>>
>>9267370
>jeans (that get washed every 6 months or so

Most disgusting thing in the thread
>>
>>9280717
Are you retarded?
Thread posts: 272
Thread images: 41


[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y] [Search | Top | Home]

I'm aware that Imgur.com will stop allowing adult images since 15th of May. I'm taking actions to backup as much data as possible.
Read more on this topic here - https://archived.moe/talk/thread/1694/


If you need a post removed click on it's [Report] button and follow the instruction.
DMCA Content Takedown via dmca.com
All images are hosted on imgur.com.
If you like this website please support us by donating with Bitcoins at 16mKtbZiwW52BLkibtCr8jUg2KVUMTxVQ5
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties.
Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the content originated from that site.
This means that RandomArchive shows their content, archived.
If you need information for a Poster - contact them.