What would you do if Jesus came to your house?

>>9168312
Bread, fish and wine.

>>9168312
Ramen, spaghetti and cheap beer.

>>9168312
I'd ask him what the problem is and then tell him to get back to trimming my hedges because he's on the clock.

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>>9168312
Jesus died for our sins. Gluttony is the best sin. Jesus would fucking love the Mcchicken

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>>9168312
A knuckle sandwich

Some water first, then a glass of wine, then pretty much whatever he might like, since if he's at my house (or anywhere on earth), we're probably in mighty big trouble.

As a Catholic, I've eaten the body of Christ and I've drank the blood of Christ, I'd offer him the same from me.

>>9168312
Ribeye medium rare and a glass of red.

>>9168353
>Some water first, then a glass of wine
Heh

>>9168312
I'd give him a $20 gift certificate at Pizza Joe's

>>9168312
A plate with whipped cream on a passion fruit, and I'd be like "Get it? Whipped? Passion?"

>>9168312
I'd take him to Cracker Barrel. I still have a gift card for that place.

>>9168312
Pulled pork

>>9168556
Jesus doesn't eat pork

>>9168577
I wonder...
He did away with the old laws after all. I think Christ would be open to some pork if he showed up today.

>>9168577
I don't give a fuck, he's having what I'm having for the night, I'm not gonna cook another meal just for him and I'm sure he's not such a selfish prick that he'd bitch and moan about it and try to get me to make something else

>>9168586
Jesus never said he did away with the old laws. Keep the fanfiction to yourself

>>9168590
Nice try, but I'm pretty sure you're the same retard I discussed death penalty with and I'm not wasting anymore time on you and the five pages of the Bible you bothered reading.

>>9168312
Fish and loaves of bread with milk and honey. I'd also make a fig jam and we'd have a good laugh about it

>>9168360
>Wait, so you're telling me you've spent your entire life eating crackers and drinking wine, convincing yourself that you're eating and drinking parts of my body
>and you want me to take a bite out of your ass and drink up as reciprocation

why are Catholics so fucking stupid?

>>9168599
Uh, I'm not sure what anon that is, but fair enough. Just to clarify I'm against it.

>>9168626
Not a catholicism exclusive ritual fami

>>9168626
Luke 22:19
And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me.

>>9168634
>And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them
> And he took BREAD

>>9168312

I'd splurge on a nice bottle of wine and try to find the best cuts of steak I could. I have no clue what else I'd try to serve with it. Maybe some shrimp or something. There's no way Christ is a vegan.

>>9168658
>hurr durr I don't know what transubstantiation is

>>9168665
>transubstantiation
> hurr durr actually believing this occurs and communion isn't just a metaphor

>>9168665
No, man. Seriously don't bother discussing the Bible with this guy.
He's some kind of fedoratipping troll who thinks he's clever, but he clearly only ever read a few cherrypicked paragraphs. Don't ruin the thread. Don't respond to him.

>>9168685
Filthy dumb Protestant scum

>>9168312
Steak with mushrooms, a baked potato with butter, some bread rolls, and a Pinot Noir.

>>9168312
kebab

>>9168691
>Anonymous 07/14/17(Fri)10:43:03 No.91
I mean the thread is kind of shit as it is, why not spice it up a notch?

>>9168664
Shrimp are unclean meats. Christ is high-priest in heaven, he can't eat those. I'd probably go for lamb or something instead.

>>9168727
>Christ is high-priest in heaven, he can't eat those.
What do you mean, anon. God can eat anything he wants to eat.

>>9168728
Yeah, but does he want to eat shrimp? He specifically tells the Israelites not to eat aquatic animals without fins and scales, because they (the Israelites) are supposed to be holy as he is holy in Leviticus 11:45

>>9168740
Dietary rules in Leviticus are all about keeping the Jews apart from everybody else, which is easier done if you can't eat anywhere but in your home or the home of another Jew. It's very likely Jesus followed these rules during his lifetime. You don't really see Christians starting to abandon Jewish law until you get to St Paul, who arrived on the scene long after Jesus was dead and said fuck circumcision.

Pork to make sure he isn't a jew

>>9168740
He told the israelites not to eat shrimp so he could have them for himself.

>>9168895
What a fuckin jew

>>9168895
Why would he need to do that? He's the almighty, he could just magically create some with his god powers anytime he wanted it.

>>9168312
If it's Jesus I let him choose
Not going to be cheap to Jesus

>>9168633
Yeah but Catholics are the only ones that believe in transubstantiation. As in, the wafer and wine literally, factually *become* literal flesh and blood after you swallow them. Other denominations just believe it's symbolic.

>>9168740
I ate shrimp for the first time in 20 years the other night. Woke up dizzy, scared the shit out of me, probably have brain parasite and its eating away as i tyfe this meffage to you firr

>>9168695>>9168691

Just lol if you truly believe that bread and wine are transformed into Christs flesh & blood IRL and it's not just a metaphor. Come on Anon, he gave us common sense.

>>9168727

I highly doubt he'd care as long as it tastes good. He's God, he's not going to be taken down by a piece of shrimp. I'm sure he'd appreciate being served the best we have to offer instead of something else. That's just my opinion though.

>>9168911
As far as you know. Maybe shrimp are unique, and the only thing in the universe that needs to occur organically on some level, maybe the universe exists just for gods shrimp cravings and the only reason he interacts with humans is because of a nebulous shrimp non-interference law

>>9168911
>>9168949
Also the idea that he's omnipotent is not at all a universal or old concept

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>>9168902
>>>9168895
>What a fuckin jew

>>9168312
Well done steak with ketchup, fries, and a diet coke.

>>9168312
hot air