/ck/ WebM Thread

>>9102169
Too ebin for moi

Can we please not ruin another potentially good thread with Jack?

>>9102169
Inception burger.

Burger within a burger

>>9102169
Those tomatoes look like shit. I hate mushy tomatoes.

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>>9102196

>>9102169
Fuck now I want McDonalds.

>>9102186
that's right XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

>>9102301
>imagine being so completely surrounded by bugs that if you swing a pot around, you catch 100 of them.

I wonder how ebola spreads so fast

>>9102301
How did it taste?

>>9102301
Pure fucking protein.
That reminds me of that train movie where they feed all the poor people gelatinous bricks of insect meal.

>>9102301
Its meat, so I'd eat it.

Wouldn't be that bad I don't think, and if it were I'd just drown it in spices like an Indian or Mexican does to cover their shit tier food.

>>9102219
That fat faggot eats straight mayo. Any food advice should be an automatically disqualified.

>>9102228
>A fucking non-Newtonian fluid for batter
This is Jack right?

>>9102301
i wonder what that tastes like

>>9102228
Peanut butter chicken?

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>>9102184
>Jack

I thought you'd never ask!

>>9102345
>steak from the Dollar Tree

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>>9102196
>Way more batter than he needs
>ice-cold oil
I still rage every time.

>>9102345
Looks way undercooked. I'm surprised this dude isn't in a constant state of food poisoning hell. He must only be able to get off the toilet long enough to make these fucking videos.

Doesn't jack have a YouTube channel?
Why don't you just go there and watch videos and post in the comments instead of posting the same thing over and over here?

>>9102362
I'm more impressed that he somehow undercooked a 1/4in thick "steak".

>>9102345
I'm not being funny that would be ideal for a broke college kid.
>Buy some noodles
>buy this shit
>season the meat a bit and fry it.
>Cut it into slices
>Maybe add an egg

You've got yourself a decent meal for under £3.

>>9102366
It's not even 1/4 lbs of meat.

>>9102315

Are you implying that ebola can spread through mosquitos or other bugs?

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>>9102169
Reminds me of the Ultimeatum

>>9102345
>>9102345
I don't understand how he can be this bad. Are all of his viewers ironic? I would want to see the demos of the average Jack viewer. Age? Political party? Country?

>>9102301
disgusting to most but they probably do this either out of necessity or tradition or both
if eating an insect burger meant not starving i'd eat it

>>9102318
>This
Snowpiercer was fantastic. Reminds me of when they used to eat grasshoppers/locusts with honey, fuck soylent.

>>9102364
You can't get (You)s that way.

someone delet this board already

>>9102459
>Filename
Kek

>>9102377
If someone ate part of that bug burger, spit it out, then you ate it maybe you could.
TBF they were probably thinking of malaria or zika

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>>9102169
Looks dry as shit. How do you fuck up frying a burger that bad?

>>9102345
holy shit this is depressing

>>9102301
I wouldn't turn down a bug burger. I can't imagine it tasting too bad.

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>>9102301
Yum bugs

>>9102599
good lord this makes me uncomfortable

>>9102599
Look, it's perfectly hygienic: he's wearing gloves.

>>9102228
What episode is this?

>>9102599
are those bees?

>>9102228
>battering in non-newtonian fluids
Is this the final redpill?

>>9102645
Yeah, you can find the video on YouTube if you search for "chinese cooking bees".

>>9102326
>>9102653
Cornstarch batters are common in Chinese-American fried dishes, you niggers.

>>9102599
jesus christ is everyting smothered in honey?

>>9102665
Maybe if you actually make a proper batter instead of a batch of seasoned oobleck

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>>9102679
>seasoned oobleck

>>9102599
Wtf are they wopses?

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>>9102459
hmmmm

>>9102196
L-lewd

>>9102196
what braindead retard can't conceive of fluid displacement and heating oil

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>>9102459
Did that chicken turn into fucking beef?

>>9102301
No wonder they all have aids

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>>9102459
>more oil than gulf of mexico

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>>9102704
>wopses

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>>9102301

>>9102817
I saw this. But I didn't get it

>>9102832
hes talking about the black people not the insects

>>9102840
Oh that's a bit of a let down for 33 replies

>>9102665
I know this, but surely it's not supposed to be so fucking thick that Sir Isaac Newton couldn't predict how it would behave in regards to the laws of physics.The only thing thicker than the stuff in that video is Jack's skull.

>>9102321
lmao double digit IQ boonie flyover faggot "IF ITS MEAT IIID EAT IT AHYUKK"

>>9102817

pre mediocre joke desu

>>9102301
>When you're too lazy to farm

>>9102817
Kek

>>9102459
What's the French name for this technique?

>>9102880
Better send them more food.

>>9102887
Confit a la crétin

>>9102887
Dep fry ala bouef

>>9102345
>Now that the butter is burning, we're going to slap the steak in the pan. The harder the better. We want to splash that hot liquid fucking everywhere

I get triggered everytime he just throws shit in hot oil/butter.

>>9102862
t. reddit

>>9102345
>now you got to flip that motherfucker like it murdered your family

>>9102219

With the slap chop, you can slap your troubles away

>>9102301
b-but aren't mosquitoes full of human blood they've sucked?

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this isn't a webm thread... it's goddamn gore thread

>>9102955
Those aren't mosquitos.

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JYAKKU

>>9102915
t. scum beneath my boot

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>>9102196
>>9102345

I'm pretty sure Jack's cooking "skills" are self-taught. Either that or he's dumb as shit

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>>9103093
It's not taught at all because he has learned nothing

>>9102345
A perfectly seared steak

>>9102345
Does he know hes retarted?

>>9103093
Jack never cooks except for when he's recording for YouTube.
There was that show where he was supposed to have a barbecue cookoff to pitch his stupid sauces, but he had no idea what he was doing and ended up just shilling his YouTube channel to the crowd instead.

>>9102887

Sioux Che'if Poquercasino

>>9103126
>retarted
Indeed.

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>>9103129
DALEED DIS

>>9103129
I saw snippets of that particular pitch on a Youtube video. I remember he burst into tears to appeal the investors, making it twice as awkward

>>9103126
yes he knows hes retartet you stupit retart

>>9102169
>McDouble
>tomatos
>no pickles
just fuck my shit up famalam

>>9102599
Are the bees supposed to be there? Is that part of the appeal?

>>9102318
snowpiercer was great, god damn

>>9103129
>>9103146
Name of that video?

>>9102459
fuck sakes

>>9103217
What's up with you?

>>9103215
https://vid.me/IHoJ

>>9103223
Boifu material right there

>>9102599
It's just free protein brah gotta get them gains.

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>>9102599
>How do you get the crust so fizzy?

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>>9103018
heh

>>9102301
what is china doing in this place again?

>>9102817
eh this wasnt that funny desu

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Does anyone have that Webm of that Mexican stand/restaurant where the guy was putting ramen noodles, doritos and other shit on top of each other and it just got worse as it progressed?

I thought I saved it but I couldn't find it.

>>9102203

Dat some Aunt Myrna's party cheese salad?

>>9103492
Don't worry, someone will post it soon. They post it literally every single time.

>>9103512
aunt myrna has a lot to answer for

>>9103530
Came here to say this exact thing.
Literally just wait 5 minutes.

>>9102196
>>9102203
>>9102219
>>9102228

I just don't understand this behavior.
Everyone fucks up and does stupid shit. When you make a mistake you evaluate what went wrong and make an effort to do better in the future it's called learning. Jack and people like him seem to completely lack in this ability I just truly do not understand how these people have managed to live up until this point.

>>9103223
No homo but I would suck his dick.

>>9103613
>I just don't understand this behavior.

It's an act. It's done on purpose to make the videos appeal to that segment of the population who like watching fail/cringe videos.

>>9102345
the way he just drops it makes me so fucking mad

i don't know why

>>9103636

I'm not so sure. Have you seen how this guy acts in public in his restaurant reviews? He's a giant manchild.

>>9102844
pol is trash, duh

>>9103676
and why couldn't that still be part of his act?

>>9102301
thats so fucking cool, link to the documentary?

>>9103699
Don't have a link to the whole thing but here's the same clip with narration at least
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJjqAajbrPE

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>>9103703
>7x the protein of a burger

shieet that explains yakub

>>9102301
>Waving pans around instead of using a fine mesh
It's like they want to starve or something

>>9103729
What in the 7 hells is this?

>>9103729
WE WUZ TALOSIANZ

>>9102599
>yfw you accidentally order something bee instead of beer battered

>>9103768
Black power ideas + ancient aliens + critical misunderstanding of history + batshit insanity

>>9103729
>BOY YOU GOD
everytime.

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>>9103729
Yeah, that seemed iffy to me as well so I looked up the nutrition facts for ground beef; about 50-55% protein.
So these patties are threehundredandfifty percent protein.
Why exactly are we not the ones getting carepackages from Africa?

>>9103768
Dan Brown except actually brown.

>>9103822
Y tho?

>>9103831
>he doesn't eat sausages straight out of the condom
fag

>>9103839
Bareback is dangerous anon.

>>9102301
Those children look so happy. I almost envy them for that.

>>9104067
I mean, they're probably going to think back to eating fly burgers on a summer afternoon the same way you think about hot dogs on the 4th of July.

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>>9103126
He may

>>9103576
I fucking lost it at the pizza

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>>9103223
Post his other webms pls.
>>9103231
I'd love to bend him over the grill and take him to poudtown.

>>9102599
I'd like some bees please. ;)

>>9103223
God damn, this guy is smooth as fuck.

>>9103804

Bugs, are almost pure protein compared with almost any other food you can find,

http://www.fao.org/docrep/018/i3253e/i3253e00.htm

http://www.fao.org/docrep/018/i3253e/i3253e01.pdf

>Many insects are rich in protein and good fats and high in calcium, iron and zinc.

Here you have the tables.

>http://www.fao.org/docrep/018/i3253e/i3253e06.pdf

Basically: They can be composed of up to 77% of protein and up to 1200 kcal/100g fresh weight(althought around 500 or 100 seems far more normal)

And if we talk about other things like algae, their mineral concentration is also far higher than usual vegetables(about vitamins... I don't remember right now)

>>9104129
I don't get bugposters or vitamin fags

Humans eat and cook for a hell of a lot more than just material consumption.

>>9104173

Which one do you prefer, vegan fags or bugfags?

>>9104185
Veganposters, because you can actually cook with their recipes or whatever, bugs it seems to me you just fry/bake them and thats it

>>9104129
If I make a halfpound patty of beef it has a quarter pound of protein.
How much, by the numbers I provided, protein is in a midge patty?

>>9102908
>hot oil/butter
The butter never burned. That pan never got hotter than about 270 degres. When he took the steak out, the butter had not really even finished foaming. He basically steamed the steak in butter. That is that shit was grey and undercooked despite being less than 1/4" thick.

>>9102228
>>9102326
>>9102642
>>9102653
>>9103613

Jack is the dumbest and most ignorant person on the face of the earth. I always say he is the perfect stereotype of what the rest of the world thinks dumb americans are. Fat, loud, rude, ignorant, stupid, etc.

I still want to meme him into buying some wagyu steak or nice tuna that costs a lot of money because you know he will ruin it.

>>9104212
It's an act

He knows his reputation and plays to it. If you watch the videos where he appears to eat raw food you'll notice he never actually directly eats something that's shown as raw. Stop embarrassing us Europeans with your idiocy

>>9102169
>the hand making that burger

>>9103768
the man that created you white boi

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>>9103788
he

>>9102196
Extreme creampie.webm

>>9103018
What the fuck is he doing?

>>9104361
Is this a porno?

>>9104399
no it is a cookie show

>>9104195
Damn, I was so fucking scared he will fuck up.

>>9104389
Hello, newfag.
Enjoy your time here.

>>9104361
Not even once does she look at the camera. Not even when presenting the food.
I don't know why this bothered me.

>>9102301
they have chickens, why are they eating mosquitos?

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>>9104418
because it is a kino cooking show and not some artsy shit with 100 camera angles

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>>9104422
in poorfag countries with no refrigeration you have to eat the entire chicken at once so you save that shit till christmas or something

>>9104418
I had to watch again to look at her face, it wasn't till the end there that i saw she was making tacos

>>9102599
I like my pastries like I like my women
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xs-tl6GBOBo

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>>9102945

>>9102599
WHY IS THIS

>>9102599
That's the bees kneads

>>9102362
Ja/ck/ is beyond your puny mortal illnesses. Pray you never see his finger when he takes that fucking ring off.

>>9104618
That steak is over cooked

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>>9104501
why the fuck did she stab an ice cream in my eye?

>>9104598
>haz deporte
Rofl

>>9104615
Impressive.

>>9104195
Got more salt on his arm than the meat, fucking twat

>>9104501
Sweden, God love them.

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>>9104630
You have a camera for a face, its not the end of the world

>>9104650
She's Swiss

>>9104622
>>9104642
Seriously though, what's the point of these? Are you supposed to scrape that shit off the table and eat it, or just look at it?

>>9104675
>what's the point of these?
Novelty.

>>Are you supposed to scrape that shit off the table and eat it
Yes.

Fine dining is entertainment, anon.

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>>9104675
It's a deconstruction of a meal. I have one with audio where they explain it as they make it. It's art imitating food imitating art.

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>>9104676
>shad

>>9104681
so how the hell are you supposed to eat that?

>>9104671
What is her hourly rate? How many pornos has she done?

>>9104671
Regardless of her nationality she's in Sweden.

>>9104603
nigga id eat that

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>>9104716
found the american

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>>9104603

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>>9104731

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>>9102169

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>>9104604
Even Jack is only a man.

>>9104674
>hebrew national

>>9104757
>hebrew

Is jack one of the tribe?

>>9104676
I wonder how much wendy's spent on this subversive porn marketing that has absolutely permeated the net lately.

>>9104761
He is 100% goyim

>>9104762
I don't know what you're talking about, could you post some examples?

>>9104779
too lewd for /ck/

>>9102371
you can get a shit ton of meals for under 3 money if you do it right.
But I almost puked from the shit in the video. that's how you ruin a piece of meat that could've been tasty otherwise.
A cow (I guess it's cow) died for THIS

>>9104779
I'm sure your folder is full to the brim, shill.

>>9104762
It was all fan art, but the woman running the twitter quit/got fired, I think she quit because she got a stalker, but the shit that went down was amazing.

>>9104698
She's a gaming commentator for Blizzard

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>>9104627

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>>9104785
An imgur link is fine.

>>9104789
I'm just your average anoonymouse hacker, one of you guys.

>>9104806
NANI?! What magic is this??????

>>9104803
this. fresh red meat doesn't need to be cooked

>>9104598
>I will be disappointed if there wasn't any lime on lime action
>I was not disappointed

>>9104812

What magic? It's a wok filled with very hot sand.

>>9104825
How does the fuckin pot thing fill each time???

>>9104812

The sand is extremely hot like a stove top, the small kettle has hot water and coffee grinds in it that rapidly boil and bubble upwards

>>9104806
If it's boiling temperature anyway, why doesn't he put the whole thing in? Does doing that really improve the taste?

>>9104832

It doesn't fill. It boils from contacting the hot sand. What you're seeing is the foam from boiling, not actual liquid filling.

>>9104731

That looks fucking awesome, I'd order that if I was piss drunk and regret nothing

>>9104845
>why doesn't he put the whole thing in? Does doing that really improve the taste?

Heck if I know. It might purely be for showing off.

>>9104844
>>9104847
neato. Does it taste any better than what a cuisinart coffee maker will spit out?

>>9102887
confit

>>9104868
I've never had it.

But I would imagine that just about anything would do a better job than a typical drip machine.

>>9103462
>when the meatball is too dank and the weed is too spicy

>>9103613
You're being trolled. Jack is a joke, he knows he's a joke, but he gets views by playing the retard. He'll never admit it but I guarantee he laughs about the shit frustrated people say about him

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>>9104195

>>9102169
good lord. 5/5 OP.

>>9103223
lol, the guy was looking suave till about 0:17s when he just looks like a massive fag. Cane never take him seriously again.

>>9104802
I see you didn't answer my questions... being a commentator does not preclude you from also being a slut/whore.

>>9104900
>he doesn't kiss his meat before grilling it

Look at this homo

>>9104907
The implication being thaat she has a regular job so is unlikely to be involved in either the porn or whoring businesses

>>9104907
>slut shaming
Back to /pol/

>>9104696
>wen u nutt but she kepp suking

>>9102349

And he somehow made is worse.

>>9104912
>commentator
>regular job
>doesn't escort during her free time
>doesn't have sugar daddies in several countries

Plenty of girls in Europe do this, I think you might be surprised.

>>9104914
Actually, I'm asking to see if I could hire her. I travel around Europe fairly often so it wouldn't be out of the question... and honestly many of the pretty girls you see around clubs or even just on instagram are available for a price. I don't go to /pol/ anyway.

>>9104914
>Being proud of taking multiple dicks up your ass
>>>/Tumblr/

>>9104696
Poor /sip/ :(

>>9104885
I admire your tenacious optimism.

>>9104942
that's about the most polite comment i've ever seen on this site. thank you

I want to see Jack cooking for Gordon Ramsay in a Kitchen Nightmares type situation.

>>9104949
He'll just avoid cooking and try to give away his stupid sauce to a production assistant or something

>>9102902
>Confit a la crétin
laughed so hard I shat myself

>>9104428
sauce

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>>9104974
rachael raxx

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>>9104676
>lotion instead of lube

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>>9105020

>>9105020
Lotion is far cheaper, works just fine

>>9105010
>bites into the side
>suddenly there's a clean cut, face sized bite from the top down as if it was carved with a laser
Immersion ruined.

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>>9105025
i can get generic kroger lube for like $1 a jar senpai

lotion makes my hand feel too soft

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>>9105031
>>9105020
>circumcised

>>9105038
uncutfag here. I just prefer lube since lotion seems too girly

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>>9105044
>uncut
>using lube when masturbating by hand and not using any toys

>>9104501
What is this called? The washed out/kinda muted filter on it

>>9104534
>>9104542
>>9104549
>>9104553
>>9104558
>>9104560
>>9104570
>>9104580
>>9104585
this is mexican "cuisine" you autist

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>>9105105
>implying there's a difference

>>9104664
DELETE THIS!!!!

>>9105020
>>9105023
>>9105031
I can only imagine the wicked burps that must come from chugging this much at once. How do people even chug beer without a funnel? The carbonation burns my nostrils too much to drink it that fast.

>>9102196
>He dips it slowly, thinking it will stop it from spilling

>>9105105
Mexico is in America, Anon.

Read a fucking book.

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>>9105120
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

>>9104372
>That shirt
>That fucking hat
>He recorded himself chugging a bottle of wine
>Didn't get a friend to do it, no he recorded that shit himself
I can feel the alcoholism

>>9104441
She's probably going to throw all that up. This is how eating disorders are created and maintained

>>9105149
What's wrong with mixing Skittles and M&Ms? They're both great candies.

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>>9105138

>>9104428
I fucking hate this fat cunt's stupid fucking face

>>9103653
im a chef.

its making you mad because it's really disrespectful to the food. I get so fucking angry watching this man spend a bunch of money on decent products (obviously not the $1 ribeye) and then just treating it like a fucking baboon.

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>>9102169
>96% lean 4% fat

>>9104660
BERSERKER BARRAGE

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>>9105158
one is a chocolate and the other is a chewy thing. they don't mix

>>9104762
Wait what?

benis

>>9104895
eh, i always tap my knife a bit before slicing. whats the problem?

>>9105172
I thought I was the only one!
>Fat as fuck
>Man face
>transvestite-tier makeup
>smug fucking grin when she licks the cream: "yeah you know you want this"

What a human piece of trash.

>>9105030
Maybe she has a perfect mouth for the succ

>>9105199
forgot
>fucked up teeth

>>9102459
somehow, watching HtB literally waste food is less painful than this


I always thought that when in anime there were characters that could turn food into bioweapons was exaggerated, i didn't know of jack back then.

>>9104806
Turkish, actually.

>>9105231
That ain't Ja/ck/

>>9105199
>>9105204
whats her name?

>>9102642
"""""general tso's chicken"""""

>>9104618
holy fuck i came

>>9104689
>a shit tonne of crew and science experts on the show and no one studied about fucking glass, let alone cooking

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>>9105266
amanda love

Jack webms are literally just one poster, right? I'd believe it was multiple people if it had been a thing that was popular for a while, and then sort of faded, but the consistency with which a thread like this must be half jack shit tells me that it's a single genuinely autistic poster, and I honestly would not be sad if they died.

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>>9105413
I am not a shill but i am also the guy who posts the titcows and i love jack for his physical comedy

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>>9105413
Ja/ck/ posters are legion, my friend

>>9105413
there's atleast a dozen of us

>>9102362
>Not knowing that Jack is actually a sentient Salmonella colony

>>9104195
What I want to know is where he got that knife from. That shit is sharp as fuck

>>9104649
>cold oil
>dropping meat that way so the oil splashes towards himself

>>9104352
I'm glad that Chipotle is healthy with no GMOs in it tee hee

>>9104501
Is that the girl who dated 2GD?

>>9104615
why does this give me a chub?

>>9104683
His stuff that isn't loli, gay/trap, or beastiality/interracial is pretty good.

>>9104914
>>>/tumblr?

>>9104689
Why did it break?

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>>9105964
>he likes piercings

>>9106008
I don't mind them but they aren't a fetish of mine.

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>>9102301
Fresh Jordans

>>9102345
How the fuck does he manage to make that paper thin meat glue strip look undercooked..

>>9104501
Ever get that feeling of deja vu

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>>9105486

>Puts his fucking phone in the raw meat container

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>>9103785
I like you.

>>9106097
I'm convinced Ja/ck/ has an underdeveloped prefrontal cortex for an adult

>>9104664
>bestiality
Disgusting as fuck.

>>9104690
With your mouth.

>>9105979
Can't put that glass on a direct flame

>>9105359
Adam has been cooking all of his life

Perfect Omelettes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1dGBRGtyzX0

Best way to sear steak
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JB1x0O-bhrw

>>9104580
fuck whoever invented dorilocos

>>9104644
This shit right here gets me. He must be mentally deficient, he's increasing the chances of getting burned tenfold, and he's making a huge ass mess

>>9106477
>Can't put that glass on a direct flame
How come? Is the heat difference between what's touching the flame and what's still room temp too much? Thermal shock?

>>9104668
Jesus Christ this man's incompetence is staggering

>>9105031
>them sleeves
>shitty chinese bladed weapons on the walls
>two shitty tvs stacked on top of each other

this is the kind of freak I've been looking for

>>9107244

Some of those knives are surprisingly not shitty, I see what is definitely a Spyderco Spyderfly, and what looks like a benchmade model 42 (hard to tell with the quality,) both of which are pretty high quality knives.

>>9107262
k pls go