use real Parmesan

It's good advice, unless you enjoy eating sawdust

use real lemon juice

>>9037079
There's literally nothing wrong with eating a tree.

>>9037073
>*jams cayenne into his pisshole*

>>9037099
Also good advice, go try it.

>>9037073
>>9037081
>This is Chef John from FOoODwishesDotCOM wiiiittthhhh... advice for not fucking up all your food! Use real fucking ingredients.
>This triggers the /ck/

Why do all guys who sound like him look the same? Very round and dark/bold hair and bald with a mustache.

You know what I mean. The micromachines fast-talking guy was the same. And they're always named Jim or John or maybe Jerry or Joe.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NeK5ZjtpO-M

what does it mean?

>>9037114
Well, he is literally a San Francisco Pride-Marching faggot...

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>tfw chef john will never give your nipples the ol tappa tappa

>>9037114
sorry, but most of us aren't made out of gold. That shit is expensive.

>>9037125
They're all Italian or Polish.

They all have their first name chosen from the narrow pool of acceptable East Coast Catholic names.

>>9037114
>This is Chef John with completely rudimentary common-sense mediocre crapola drenched in a toothless ukulele-xanax-happy sheen, here to easily impress the easily impressed bisexual incompetent millenials while they eat their 3rd Cup O' Noodles in between episodes of their Steven Universe binge.

>>9037128
as opposed to?

>>9037145
racist

>>9037152
Man, you okay?

>>9037152
>taking breaks between episodes during your SU binge
Only Lapisfags do this.

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Do you think John knows about cayenne hair growth shampoo?
Sounds like it was created specially for that bald goof.

>>9037161
Projecting your concern for yourself after I just threw you into a psychological tizzy? Hope you feel better, man.

>>9037168
the cayenne stimulates the glands, with burning

>>9037177
Nah, but you do you, man.

>>9037195
Lmfaoing @ ur life

>>9037177
>Projecting your concern for yourself after I just threw you into a psychological tizzy?
*tips fedora in the moonlight*

>>9037135
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Double_tap

>>9037128
Proofs?

>>9037125
It means you are mentally ill.

>>9037114
>eat stuff that grows in dirt instead of engineered (((value added))) bullshit
>"omg anon that's so extreme"

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>>9037135
>tfw chef John will naver give your dick the good ol shaka shaka

>>9037128
you cant make accusations like that without evidence

>>9037073
>real Parmesan
Not available in the USA.
Sorry.

>>9037744
You can literally get imported Parmigiano Reggiano at walmart dumbshit

>>9037924
Not only that, but WF actually has the wheels with the imprint stamp guaranteeing authenticity. It seems expensive but people forget that a little bit goes a long way.

>>9037073
What's going on in this pic?

>>9038112
I assume he was trying to take a selfie for the blog but being Chef John women kept throwing themselves at him.

Why the fuck does he talk that way?

>>9038142
because he's a faggot that lives in san fancisco

>>9037128
He has a wife you faggot

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>>9038230
She's not attractive but neither is he

>>9038354
Yeah "Michelle"? She's a post-op, I assume. Don't recall them having any kids.

>>9038368
Her surname is Manfredi so I guess you're right.

How expensive is parmesan in the US? It's pretty cheap here in England, I have a hard time believing it's particularly inaffordable.

>>9038423
$18-24 a pound, depending on the variety

>>9038430
OK well that is quite a lot then. You can get it for £6 a pound over here, $18 would get you a kilo.

>>9038430

You are surely referring to parmigiano-reggiano.

"Parmesan" is always fake cheese and costs very little.

>>9038438
But "parmesan" is slang for Parmigiano-Reggiano, much like how we say "burgundy" when we mean wine from Bourgogne

Only white trash thinks it means that crap from Wisconsin or that burgundy means boxed wine from California

That's corrupt food lobbying practices seeping into common speech, and is not to be taken seriously

>>9038438
Loads of people refer to the real thing as parmesan you autist

>>9038445
>But "parmesan" is slang for Parmigiano-Reggiano

No, not really.
Parmesan refers to the cheap fake stuff specifically.

>>9038437
>£6 a pound
Reading this gave me a headache.

>>9038451
>European law classifies the name, as well as the translation "Parmesan", as a protected designation of origin
I look forward to your apologies, anon-kun.

>>9038449
But those people are objectively wrong. Why should we condone that behavior?

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>>9038466
t.CEO of Sargento, a division of Mondelez

>>9038368
they had a son but he died

>>9038460
I stand corrected. Though I see no reason to apologize as I didn't do anything to wrong you.

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Chef John spanks your wife's ass.
What do you do?

>>9037152
Hahahahahaha

>>9038541
Depends. Was it a tap-a-tap-a or a whack-a-whack-a?

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>>9037135
>>9037152
>>9037583
>>9038541
>>9038890


my fucking sides

for me, it's the Chef Johnposting, the best /ck/ meme

>>9037139
Real parmesan isn't that expensive tho.

>>9037152
I bet you're fun at parties.

>>9037177
Let your mom know your sugars are getting low.

>>9037152
>millenial posting about millenials posting about a boomer who markets himself to everyone

>>9037114
>Better than 98% of cooking videos on YouTube
>Can't fucking speak the language properly

>>9038541
>john reed
That's not him

>>9037073
I use grana padano as a cheaper alternative. Fuck you chef John from foodwishes.com, you don't tell me what to do

>>9037073
You're a fucking creep. No one sees it, but I do, faggot

>>9038525
>they had a son but he died

Why?

>>9037152
point and laugh at this faggot

did anyone watch his facebook stream?

>>9037152
really stirs the proverbial almonds

>>9039120
yes but the host was a fucking twat, he made it awful to watch

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Too bad his vids are crap now because he takes requests from retarded middle age women. He's basically a step above those tasty vids now in terms of recipe quality.

>>9037139
it is like 30 cents worth of parm for a plate of pasta
If you can't afford that you need to go back to school

>>9038437
>1kg = 3lbs
Ok m8

>>9037073

are there people that unironically watch this guys videos and not want to kill themselves because of the way he autistically changes the pitch of his voice

besides that his videos without audio are mediocre at best

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>>9037272
>he gives me the ol tappa tappa
>nothing personnel kid

>>9037152
I know there's words here but I don't know what any of them mean

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>>9037073
>use whole milk
>only have 2%

>>9037128
>literally making shit up
Kill yourself

>>9037139
Maybe you should spend less time on the computer watching cooking videos and more time working if you can't even afford parmesan.

>>9038541
Add some good ol cayenne to the ass and eat it like groceries