I had a dream that I was interning for Alton Brown, except he

>>8908547
>apologizing him
for him*
May or may not have been drinking.

>>8908547
i had a dream alton came inside me

I had a dream I was raping Rachel Ray in front of her stupid fucking dogs and husband. I had to go jerk off to pictures of her dumb, chubby face just to get my boner to chill out.

I can cook tho :(

>>8908872
I had the same dream but it was with Giada

>>8908884
how? do you live in a house with low benches? how did you do it before living in a house with low benches?

>>8908928

I can see over shallow pans on the stove, oven is fine and for larger pots and pans I can use a mobile induction top on a lower level.

I believe you can also get adjustable height stove tops if you have the coin.

I had a dream a few nights ago where I went to a mall in a restaurant with some friends. It had this bizarre arrangement where there were tables and chairs floating in the air, and there were rollercoaster tracks running everywhere so people could get around.
Well, we get seated and we have this shitty table that has all this leaky plumbing coming out of the ceiling covering it so there's no room for plates or anything.
And the waitresses are super shitty, they'd flat out tell you that you were wrong. People were getting up to leave, saying they wouldn't come back. "Yes you will." People were saying that they'd leave shitty reviews on Yelp. "No you won't." So I get up and say I'm leaving, and the waitress says "no you're not" and I scream "FUCK OFF" at her and left anyways. Everyone else was thinking the same thing but they were all shocked at the way I just screamed at her.
And then I spent like five minutes marching out of the mall feeling hungry and pissed as hell.

>>8908547
This is what dream recorders will be invented for.

>>8908916
I had the same dream but it was Emril. He yelled "BAM" with every thrust.

Last night I had a dream that I was fucking my mother in the mouth and it was like we did it all the time, then I woke up and made pasta, what does it mean?

>>8910434
You want mom's spaghetti.

>>8909716
Mine was Guy Fieri, before I came in his mouth I said, "HERE COMES FLAVORTOWN"

>>8910434
Block it out of your memory. Ive had one or two like that and i just force myself to forget it

>>8910669
Yeah this isn't the first one. Doesn't help that the girl I'm dating kinda reminds me of my mom a lil bit

>>8910850
Oh no. That part is normal/natural.

>>8908547
I saw Alton Brown at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen grilled cheese sandwiches in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the sandwiches and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each sandwich and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

>>8910434
I get that with whatever I'm fucking turning into my cat sometimes, I wouldn't look too much into it, wires just tend to get crossed. Even before the dream ends I'm disgusted

>>8910850
That's actually pretty normal. People typically date people that remind them of their parents

>>8910642
kek'd way to hard at this

>>8912173
where did i see this copy pasta before?

>>8912780
Lurk moar newfaggot

I shot my wad on Mario Batali's Crocks. He threw a ravioli at me.

>>8912780
/lit/