What's the best way to prepare lobster?

In a movie theater while the crab legs get cold.

in a free market

Wrap it in 20+ years worth of racist newsletters and boil it in colloidal silver

>>8838490
>racist newsletters
Yeah but were these newsletters wrong?

>colloidal silver
CS only has a minimal effect in people but that doesn't mean it should be ignored.

>>8838465
>not kosher
into the garbage it goes.

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19KB, 367x500px

>>8838982
>Believing in a fictional historical book

butter, 400g
garlic cloves, peeled, 125g
shallots, peeled, 125g
ginger, peeled and sliced, 50g
lobsters, as many as will fit

All ingredients but lobsters in a pot.
Allow to melt and come to a gentle boil.
Lower heat to bare simmer.
Add lobster.
Poach until cooked.
Remove lobster.
Strain butter.

white pepper, 2tbsp
cumin seed, 1 tbsp
green cardamom seeds (not pods; the little black things inside them), half tbsp
nigella seed, half tbsp
maaduru/dill seed, toasted, half tsp (NOT tbsp)
Toast all seeds then set aside to cool. Do not crush yet.

Cooled spices, from above
candlenuts, 50g
>raw cashew or macadamia is a good substitute but must be raw. and it's expensive
>blanched almond is a decent enough sub and far cheaper
coriander roots. peeled, 4
young sand ginger/galangal, peeled, 1 thumb
>make sure it's not old or it will be woody/fibrous
zest, of 2 limes
turmeric powder, 2tbsp
>good quality a must
>if your turmeric is tasteless, try to source fresh roots
>2 of those should do it
lobster butter from above, 100g

Powder the spices then set aside.
Pound candlenuts then remove the resulting paste.
Pound coriander roots, sand ginger and zest into a paste.
Add spices, turmeric and candlenut paste then whip.
Add a tablespoon or two of the butter to loosen the paste a tad, if necessary.
Set aside.

remainder of the 100g of lobster butter from above
onion, peeled and sliced thinly, 1 medium
tomato, peeled and crushed, 2 medium
fish stock, as needed
paste, from above
curry leaves, a handful

Cook the onion and tomato in the butter until lightly caramelised, adding a little fish stock at a time to help that along.
When done, add the paste and caramelise that lightly, as well.
Add just enough fish stock to make a sauce of the ingredients in your pan.
Stir in curry leaves, pour over cracked lobsters and serve as part of a rice plate meal.

>Cut the rubberbands from its claws
>release it back into the ocean so it can live for literal decades, frolicking around with the other vile seabugs whose flavor is completely overrated and usually just a medium by which people can drink melted butter and feel luxurious instead of disgusting

>>8839302
I'm no vegan but I agree with this provocational statement.

Have your child slave prepare it

>>8838465
Either butter poached or grilled/broiled with herbs, garlic, and the fat of your choice.

>>8839302
>it can live for literal decades
Damn I want a pet lobster now

>>8839302
>releasing it back into the ocean where it will quickly die to predation due to being kidnapped from the original home, shipped in a tank to your supermarket, purchased by a manchild, driven back to a variable spot along the coast liable to be endless miles from its actual home, and dumped unceremoniously because that manchild believed he was doing good instead of just condemning an animal to death in a different, crueler manner


B-B-BUT IT'S NATURRRR FOR THE SEAGULL TO EAT IT LIKE FIVE MINUTES AFTER I DRIVE AWAY LMAO

i hate you hippies and every polluted cancer you dump into pop culture

>>8839314
Provocational
I'm no teacher but I agree that your education system has failed you.

>>8838465
Split & cleaned on the grille