Why did my pizza do this?

>>8828894
thermal shock

>>8828894
because you bought it at aldi

>>8828894
It was born to be a taco pizza, but you assumed it's gender and caused a rebellion.

>>8828894
you were so supposed to let the pizza rest but you woke it up too early my friend, hence its reaction.

That looks like a tombstone pizza, you were destined to fail

>>8828894

Maybe it's the diet talking, but it looks damn good to me, anon.

my mom had that blender

>>8828909

Why do you think it's Tombstone?

>>8828979
the color of the pepperonis, the quality of the bell peppers and the crust

however, I would appreciation confirmation

>>8828894
It tried to fly away to avoid the heat

>>8828909
It's obviously a Digiornio Supreme Rising Crust

>>8829042
This, anyone who's had their fair share of frozen pizzas can see this

>>8829042
That crust definitely rose

>>8828901
>thermal shock
fpbp.

Preheat next time OP.

Looks similar to tombstone but a little too high quality for tombstone... It's Palermos.

>>8828979
>>8828909
>>8828987
>>8829042
>>8829413
>>8829493
I have analyzed the pixels and I can say that it is definitely not Digiorno and definitely not Delissio.

Google images confirms for certainty that this pizza is Tombstone.

>>8829559
Looks identical to my stop and shop store brand rising crust supreme pizza digeornos rip-off. OP I'm betting you left it on the cardboard insert

>>8828903
Cozi's don't curve senpai.

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>>8828894
It's the latest in consumer memes

>>8828894
That would be the Pringle crust

>>8828894
bc you forgot to put pineapple on it

You're supposed to add anchovies to hold the sides down.

>>8829775
No, you nail it down to a substrate then caulk the circumference of the pie to lock it into position.

The pizza curled into a ball from the suffering heat it was exposed to.

You forgot to take it off the cardboard

LOL OP YOU'RE GAY LIKE YOUR PIZZA KEKEKEKEKEKEK

>>8828894
You are supposed to top them with one whole onion, sliced thin.
I love your coffee pot and blender.

That is a Red Baron you amateurs

>that '70s blender

>>8828894
It saw your kitchen thought it was the eighties and started popping some "electric boogaloo", end up fucking his crust up.

>>8830848
Put it on a tray.

>>8828958
ok

>>8830882
no

>>8828894
holy shit is that a Mr. Coffee?

>>8830943
kek

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Shoulda just went with some Totinos

>>8828894
>those appliances
Are you my mother?

>>8831047

What if I am?

>>8830848
It's just waving at you, wave at it back anon

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>>8828894

That's a Tony's Supreme
t. A guy who eats a Tony's supreme pizza once a week

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>>8828894
>ITT people who can't identify pizza
Morons.

>>8832917

It's a fucking Tombstone m8

>>8828958
my mom still has that blender and it still works and she still uses it

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>>8829750

>>8828909
>>8832917
>>8832947
Looks like a Kroger frozen pizza

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I eat frozen pizza more nights than I care to admit, so I'm not on some handmade-pizza high horse. but honestly anybody that eats so much frozen pizza that they can identify the brand just by looking at it should probably examine their life.

>>8832917
The one in the pic doesn't look like premium quality, so it can't be red barron,

>>8828894
your pizza is now pringles

>>8828894
It's imitating the true shape of the Earth.

>>8833030
>i'm less perceptive than you so you should feel bad about having a larger brain than me

Fuck off brainlet

>>8832970

fucking things last forever. and really what does a new blender do that they don't? THEY ALL BLEND

>>8833719
>making guesses about a pizza's brand makes you smart

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>>8828894
Cuz u touch urself at night

>>8832917
>>8833719
Sorry m8's, I'm not a member of the lower class so I'm sadly uninformed about the intricacies of frozen pizza brands.

>>8828894
>my pizza

>>8829756
This thread is pure gold. Have an upboat.

>>8830848
Oh, I see the problem here.
You're letting your oven get too hot.
See those red lights at the bottom? They're there to let you know the temperature is in the danger zone.

>>8828894
Did you forgot the piece of cartbord under it while cooking ?

I want a junk food doctor to diagnosis my sick and ailing frozen Foodstuffs. Why do my burritos split down the middle after microwaving? Why does the cheese on the edge boil while the cheese in the middle stays cold? What causes those extra hard chunks that rarely occur in breakfast cereals? Why am I peeing blood?

>>8828894
your pizza just wants a hug anon

>>8828894
Because you done fucked up.

>>8835698
>Why do my burritos split down the middle after microwaving?

The insides are heated above 100C. The resulting steam bursts the tortilla. You can easily fix this by cooking for less time or a lower power setting.

> Why does the cheese on the edge boil while the cheese in the middle stays cold?
You have a shitty microwave that cooks unusually unevenly. Get around the problem by cooking for a longer time on a lower heat setting.

>>What causes those extra hard chunks that rarely occur in breakfast cereals?
Sometimes ingredients clump together in the factory that makes the cereal.

>Why am I peeing blood?
I can't help you there.

l2oven

Don't eat it, it will release mustard gas

>>8828894

Cheers OP for having a gas stove. I feel like those are almost a lost art these days.

>>8835517
>upboat
>>>/r/eddit

>>8835824
Not him but when making corn tortillas I can never get them to brown slightly without drying out and cracking. Otherwise they end up unsatisfactory and gummy.

How do I get them nice?

>>8829750

kek

That's what you get for not going with the chicago deep dish.

>that blender
>that coffee maker
>that gas stove
>that Tombstone pizza

OP it's like you're literally in a time warp

>>8837000
kek

>>8837008

I'm not even kidding. There isn't a single thing in the photo that tells you it was taken recently.

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>>8836496
Like this, from fresh masa in an iron skillet. Water and masa, that's it. Iron skillet on medium, flip after 30 seconds, flip after another 30 seconds, flip for another 30 seconds. 1 1/2 cups of hot water to 2 cups of masa.

Don't you reckon if shitskins can do it, you can too?

>>8837027
the handle on the pan is kind of ergonomic.

>>8837046
Yeah, that's a dead giveaway.