Your most visited grocery store has a raffle and you win a 2

Electronics.

>Run to specialty cheese section
>Take it all

Maybe pick up some seafood to eat that night too. Nothing else is expensive enough to be worth it.

Toilet roll, garbage bags, cleaning products etc.

You might think getting $2,000 worth of meat for free is a good idea, but then you run into the issue of having to store it. Toilet roll doesn't go off and you always regret running out of that WAY more than you regret running out of ground chuck.

Obviously go for the liquor anyway.

How is that even a question?

>>8716470
I live in a state with a massive hunting/fishing tourism industry. We all have chest freezers. Not an issue imo.

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>>8716470
>Grab 15 jugs of laundry detergent
>Only realize after that it's not HE and will fuck up your expensive washing machine
Th-thanks...

>>8716451
I'd run through the artisan cheese section in the first minute and have $1,000.00. Then, I'd raid the meat/butcher department, and load my basked with a hundred pounds of fish, shrimp, beef, lamb, etc....

I'd then sell half of it, and make $$$$$

Scotch. Rum. Candy and other things i rarely buy.

oysters, mussels, beef

>>8716470
i will can what i can't consume of freeze

>fill entire kart with nectarines

First minute, fill my cart with as many cucumbers, carrots, and eggplants as I can grab.
Second minute, shovel the entire shelf of petroleum jelly into the cart.
Tell them not to worry about it.

The most expensive stuff I tend to buy is meat, so I'd probably head there first and get lots of beef. It's pretty expensive per calorie so I could get a lot and likely get through it all before it goes bad and is probably the most cost effective for "free".

I think eating all the food you get before it spoils on a spree would be tough, so even though it's cheap, I'd grab lots of rice, beans, and lentils because they'll last and I'd not have to buy any more for ages (and they're also right next to each other in the aisle). Probably flour/yeast, too, though yeast tends to not last more than a year for me.

I could maaaybe end up taking most of the spice section on my way from the rice to the flour, but I'd grab lots of salt at the very least.

Produce is good and all, but no point in buying lots with how quickly it goes bad.

My grocery store only has weak liquor, so it's borderline not worth it; I doubt I could do more than the above in two minutes anyway.

Relatively boring choices, but it'd save me tons of money and I'm confident I could do it in 2 minutes.

>>8716451
I skip the cart and run through every isle knocking everything off the shelves.

I'd stock up on hair dye, pantyhose and dentabones. Also, I'd try to grab a case or 2 of grape Fanta.

all of the batteries so i can sell them on ebay

Chocolate then chips.
Mby pop since same isle

>>8716819
I don't even drink pop id just sell it and most of the chips since they would sell easily

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>>8716498
http://nymag.com/news/features/tide-detergent-drugs-2013-1/

>>8716451
I would go directly to the dry nuts aisle and load up on expensive brazil nuts, macadamia nuts, pecans, etc then head over to the baker's aisle and shove all the good quality chocolate bars and bars into my cart and then on the way back swing by the cereal aisle and grab as many boxes as I could before it was over.

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>>8716819
>>8716825
Die midwesterners.

>>8716451
>the manager strategically places you at the entrance furthest from the alcohol.
>implying that's a disadvantage
Liquids are fucking heavy. If I start by the meats and then make my way over to the alcohol then I am pushing less weight and can get there faster in order to load up before the buzzer.

>>8716451
>manager strategically places you at the entrance furthest from the alcohol
Go for that shit anyway. Then go for some canned goods and frozen shit if there's time leftover.

>>8716913
I dunno about you, but I'm not entirely sure I'd want my town to know me as the guy who used his shopping dash to horde hungry mans, tinned chilli and whiskey.

>>8716921
Who gives a fuck

motherfucking crab legs. At my grocer the expensive cheese is between the entrance and the crab legs, so as i pass i'm gonna drag their whole parmesan display into the cart. I'm not sure if those cheese wheels are still good or not, but I know for a fact that they're real.

>>8716451
liquor

I'd head to the nice cheese/olives/hummus section,clean it out, and grab a few sacks of onions on my way. I'd have enough time to make it to the meat section and snag at least a few months worth of meat. If I was allowed to smash the deli casings I'd grab a bunch of turkeys and hams.

>>8716451
>get whatever it is you want

all reserves of oxi instock behind the pharmacy desk. would be able to spin it at a really good price i imagine

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>run to cheese section
>hoist three or four whole wheels into cart
>run to canned goods
>100 cans of Ro-Tel diced tomatoes and chilies

>>8716451
>specialty cheeses (brie, d'affinois, cambozola, smokehouse blue, and espresso bellevitano)
>seafood (crab legs, shrimp, lobster tails, sea scallops)
>wine and tequila
They're all right next to each other, one after the other.
I'd also grab all of the prosciutto they have.

Depending on how much time I had left, I might run a few aisles over to the candy and sweep all of the specialty chocolate bars into my cart.

I think realistically I could get a thousand dollars of product or more in two short minutes.

straight to the cash registers

>>8716451
>, the manager strategically places you at the entrance furthest from the alcohol.

thats right infront of the electronics for me, i just start piling up the 4k 120hz curved tvs on my cart fort 2 minutes

>>8716451
>go directly to cash register
>stuff cart with a few thousand € full of cigarettes

This thread really makes me miss Supermarket Sweep

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBUM0fM2Qdc

i have a really awesome fruit shop I got to all the time run by italians, so it's got all sort of nice oils, vinegars, cheeses, breads etc, it's got a nice deli too
would probably go and grab all that kind of stuff, palettes of tinned tomatoes, sausages and cold cuts, all kinds of herbs and spices, just lots of super nice semi obscure italian/mediterannean shit too really

>>8717446
Do you shop at delis? Realistically, the best most supermarkets can do is offer truffle oil or paste.

>>8716451
I'd go for the peanuts, bacon/teriyaki jerky, the chips/iced tea isle, next comes the shampoo/body spray/hair stuff

But first I'm ransacking the pet food because that fucking shit costs me more than the food I eat.

>>8716451
All the fucking canned tuna there is

>>8717493
Good point, go for all the fucking jared peanut butter there is

>>8717493
This, pet food is becoming expensive as hell.

Afterwards grab the cleaning supplies and if time is left grab the steaks, sausages and bacon

>>8716451
Are we allowed to sell what we grab? If so, diapers and Tide liquid detergent. Both are easily sold and are practially a currency on their own.

If it's just stuff that I am going to use personally? Fresh herbs on the way in. Fancy deli meats, imported cheeses, Then steaks/seafood. If there is time left, round the corner for bacon.

>>8716451
1. imported cheeses
2. all the $50+ bottles of vinegar
3. sweep all the upper shelf bags of coffee into cart (they will act as cushioning for...)
4. expensive extra virgin olive oil
5. nuts (not peanuts. fuck you peanuts. I can already afford you.)
6. all the beef jerky on top.
7. if any time remains, I'm heading to spice/baking aisle and grabbing vanilla beans, saffron (I don't even like saffron, but it's expensive), and the big baking bars of Scharffen Berger chocolate. Should I still have time left, I will grab every jar of black peppercorns I can.

My basic strategery is high price to weight ratio non-perishables. Things you don't need, but it'd be nice to have years of surplus. All of this shit is gift-worthy, too.

Bet I'd clear $3,000

All the booze and wine's on an upstairs mezzanine, so it'd be a waste of time.

I would jump to the rice section and take their biggest bags of rice, which can be 50kg (110lbs) bags.

probably will get 10, which is enough to feed the whole city.

then i would store it for when famines come, when hunger is everywhere it will be my duty to save mankind.

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>>8717613

>>8716451
Olive oil. Stuff is expensive and I'm running out of olive oil within a week.

After that I will probably stock up on the cleaning products and shower products.

Run for the cheese/deli section, and see if I can grab some gin, rum, or vodka when the cart is full/nearly full

>>8716778
You're the hero we need

>>8717654
You're the hero we don't deserve

It's been said before but literally mad dash to the artisan cheese, turn the cart sideways and shovel.

>>8716451
Meats/seafood, cheeses, and veggies/fruits. And at my grocery store these are placed rather close together.

Since so many have already listed cheese I don't know.

Lightbulbs I guess?

>>8716451
Head straight for the razors. Empty the shelves, then the tabacco. Reckon there should be a couple of grand between the two.

I fill the cart with $60+ booze, which is located next to the cashier, cuz muh thefts :^)

>>8716872
No one in western NY says pop unless they are over 40, this map is out of date.

All these retards not heading to the pharmacy. Light, overpriced as fuck, easy to resell, long shelf life, etc.

I'll just run around and knock everyone elese carts over.

Gift card section

The end

>>8716470
With the money I saved i can just buy a chest freezer.

>>8718440
All the otc shit you can swipe into a shopping cart would be a good strategy. I doubt they'd let you behind the pharmacy counter, since that'd be illegal.

>>8718457
Hypothetically, the store pays for the gift cards. How many of them do you think they'll activate for you in two minutes? I bet they'd slowly charge 2 of them up at whatever amount they felt like. That's just asking them to fuck up your supermarket sweep.

Cartons of cigarettes.

I'll grab $5,000-10,000 worth, sell for a car.

>>8716451
I'd rush to where they sell cigarettes instead of booze, cigarettes are easy to sell to homeless people and high school kids. Great way to make money off of your sweep even if you don't smoke, just do it slowly so the authorities don't catch on

>>8718440
>>8718489
Alternative to the pharmacy might be health foods/natural living. I could get a lot of sixty-dollar bottles of vegan retard protein shake mix into a cart.

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Legit I'd just grab a bunch of wheels of parmagianno reggiano and as much liquor would fit in the basket. I'd probably still have extra time to kill

>>8716451
I go to a Super Walmart the most.
even the furthest entrance is fine, because nobody else will be in the store, I can run with the cart for once. booze is in the back left. then it's just a quick run to the next corner to pick up a couple big packs of raw meat, who cares what it is, and to the register. i'll make it just under 2 minutes

>>8718552
Selling loosies is one of the easier ways to catch a case, shit gets cracked down on hard.

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>>8718535
Julian?

>>8718200
Nigger, can you read

>>8716457
>grocery store

medical supplies and medicines.

>>8718230
Can you read?

>>8716872
>other
>"One fuzzy belly tickle ha ha juice, please!"

run for the meat department, which is right next to the liquor. grab some saffron and vanilla extract on the way. get good steaks, lobster, swordfish and salmon. then head over to the liquor shelf and grab a bunch of top shelf bottles. probably mostly scotch and bourbon, but get a variety of other things to fully stock my bar.

>>8716451
One good quality imported cheese wheel is worth thousands - so in lieu of electronics, if those were available I would take that and sell them.

Barring that, spices and meats and a bunch of junk.

I'd unbolt one of them deli slicers and take that.

I'd fill the cart with premium brand baby formula, as much as possible. That shit ain't cheap. Then I'd resell it, pocket the money and spend it elsewhere.

Beer is close to the entrance so probabaly there first. Then specialty cheeses. Then bulk foods for dried mushrooms and pine nuts.

Whisky and hard booze first, expensive cheese, some pieces of expensive meat cuts, and some ice cream

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A certain part of me wants to grab one of those aisle-end racks with pic related and dump the whole thing in because it's like $20 a pound, never seems to move and is the kinda' shit you'd never buy with a level head but god dammit you kinda' fixate on it after passing it hundreds of times and mocking it each time.

In reality though, probably just split it between cheese and meat. A shitton of jarlsberg, halloumi, paradiso beemster, anglo-saxon chedders, dubliner and some other good Scandinavian-y cheeses, then top it off with boneless chicken, ground beef, roasts, steaks and a few boneless hams and packs of thick-ass bacon. Time provided, maybe snatch up all those almond cheese balls/logs, those things are like fucking cocaine.

>>8718230
Which is about the median age for Erie and the surrounding counties, plus we get tons of college students fleeing flyover states and bringing their vernacular with them. From experience and a quick look at some menus we use soda, pop and both pretty interchangeably.

>>8718940
>"Tonic"
Who the hell besides senile geriatrics uses that as a catch-all? Unless you're talking snake oil or the namesake component of a gin and tonic that's just creepy.

canned goods as fast as i can and give donate it all to the local homless shelter :^)

The 17 year old girl that bagged my grocieries at publix the other day.

Raspberries, dried lobster/porcini mushrooms, pistachios, pricy cheeses, caviar, truffle products, salmon, and a last-minute dash through the yuppie aisle for frozen goods. If I'm still not at 2 minutes, I grab some roses and houseplants.

If they have their service seafood section pre-packaged, crab legs, crab cakes, and anything else that looks good.

>>8716451
I would grab an entire prosciutto ham from the deli section, probably a couple other huge sausages and cheeses

Then I would head over to the meats and get a mountain of raw chickens, ribs, the best steaks I could get. I would then host a huge barbecue for everyone I know and share the love.

That would probably be all I have time for, if I could I would grab a shitload of Haribo gummies too.

>>8716451
I don't drink a lot so I won't go for the alcohol. Maybe grab a bottle or two on my way to the back of the store where the butcher is, and grab some of the better/more expensive meats. Cheeses are right next to that so grab some of that too while I'm at it. Gotta go fast so I won't have a ton of time to pick out all the best stuff, but it shouldn't be hard to get a decent selection. If there's still time after that, go to the isle on the other side and start shoveling herbs and spices into my cart since they're relatively expensive and I tend to go through them pretty fast.

Expensive sausages and cheese
Vitamin supplements
Expensive hair products
Lottery tickets

>>8717429

what kind of grocery stores do you have that sell 4k TVs? Is this some CK meme i'm not aware of?

>>8717552
good point, diapers and formula type shit would sell fast.

>>8718732
What is wrong with his reading comprehension?

>>8719209
Underrated post

>>8716451
Run through bakery first
Grab some choco chip cookies and bagels for the kids
And thru the produce aisle steak and salmons and maybe a few sausages and bacons
Now to the dairy aisle
Probably grab all the fairlife off the racks
Just for the fuck of it
Now to alcohol: 1 meme beer (whatever hot new craft option catches my eye)
And back thru the produce aisle... maybe grab some fruits, especially dried fruits, and veggies, a shit ton of nuts, and some kraft dinners, maybe some canned shit on the way out, beans, oh yea, and jalapeños, and pickles.

Fuck u op I'm going to the store now

I remember Oprah did this on her show one time. The lady that ran to the coffee aisle and filled her trolley with coffee got the most money's worth in her trolley.

With respect to how my grocery is arranged i'd start with the expensive fish/seafood, then grab all the good nuts on the way to the wine(mostly bordeaux/burgundy but a few good rhone too), after that i'd dash for the good oils and vinegars and i'f I have time run to the cheese and just stuff everything from the artisanal section into the cart.

>>8717485
are you really too retarded to understand what they just said or are you just a pretentious bitch?

>>8719189
Those bacon strips are shit.

The fucking booze obviously.
I would just fill my cart with booze.
The place I most visit is not too large, I could easily make to to liquor in 30 seconds.

>Only visit this board when I get bored, so I shop at Wal-Mart
>Entrance farthest from alcohol is lawn and garden
>Next to that is sporting goods, so I load up on guns and, time permitting, ammo

My Safeway only has one entrance.

And it's four seconds from the booze.

>>8716451
Nutritional yeast, apple cider vinegar, toothpaste, mustard, Dr bronners, detergent, beer, avocados, mangoes, corned beef, sauerkraut, cheese

>>8718067
this guy gets it

>>8719373
>>8718899
the super walmarts have a full grocery section in addition to all the other regular departments like clothes, electronics, etc. so if you regularly get your groceries at wallyworld then technically that would be your "most visited grocery store."

I'd get all the oils they have and then as much meat as I can grab. I can freeze all that shit and have oil for years. Maybe grab some salt, sugar, and flour if I have the time since I bake a lot of pastries.

>>8716470
Joke's on you, I have a chest freezer.

>>8720563
Oil goes rancid baby

>>8716451

Beef tenderloins
Lamb loin
Fresh sockeye salmon fillets and halibut
As many Amy's frozen pizzas I can get because they are like $10 each and it's bullshit but tasty
Specialty cheeses

>>8716757
Quality post

>>8720736
Which is why you FREEZE it.

>wegmans

I'd sprint to the back and take their Parmigiano cheese wheel, swiping scotches and wine on the way there if I'm going sonic speed

The vitamin supplement section. Stuff is expensive and easy to resell to hippies.

top shelf booze for selling purposes

Alcohol and deli are pretty close to each other. I'd be scooping all the roast beef into the cart and then grabbing whiskey and scotch to sell to people. Cheese is opposite the deli meats, so I'm taking like 50 blocks of good stuff. AFter that, it's a mad dash over to the homeware section. Pots, pans, toasters, kettles, knives.

Frozen pizzas and hard liquor

As many hotpockets as I can for my job.

>>8716451
Go straight for meat section. Clear out beef first, then pork, and if time grab bacon and cheese but that's usually located a little further from the meat isle. Also grab all the fresh herbs/shrooms as they're usually located in meat section. Freeze meat when I get home and live like a king for a year.

>>8722926
The only legit post; rest are too long.

Next to the entrance is the pharmacy, grab all the no-snore/no-stop-breathing-in-your-sleep nose-strips because they are expensive as fuck and I practically need them to live at this point, then from there a mad dash to the spices, get ALL the fancy expensive spices, across from that on same aisle is the oil, grab all the fancy olive oil, and coconut oil, and expensive meme oils like avocado oil (never tried it but why the hell not?)
If I have any time left, a short distance away is the cooking equipment aisle, grab as many utensils, baking dishes, pans, and fancy storage containers as I can.

>>8716451
I head straight for the pharmacy and stock up on prescription meds

>>8722926
>Freeze meat

niqqa you can salt it and smoke it

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Meat section, load up on beef and pork then it's off the cheese section to grab a couple wheels. If I still have time, make a dash to grab the biggest bags of rice I can. Since at my market the rice is next to the Asian/Latino food, grab all the delicious salsa and hot sauce I can.

And with seconds to spare at checkout, grab a dozen gift cards, charge $500 on each and I'm spent.

>cured meats
>expensive spices
>honey
>cheese

>>8716451
Jokes on you my state doesn't allow liquor in grocery stores

>>8723138

Um, it actually sounds like the joke's actually still on you.

herb isle. take all the saffron and vanilla bean, as well as all other herbs i guess

>>8718680
But everyone loves loosies

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fuck this thread
I went to my local store today to practise so I could post a good answer. Spend 20 minutes running around doing research, sprinting to different aisles to try and figure out the best possible choices.

Guess what?
Now I am banned because they fucking thought I was trying to steal.

Thanks guys.

>>8716470
You need to think bigger.

>No carts
>run to freezer aisles
>disconnect wheeled ice cream chest from aisle end
>open and tip
>turn upright, then run towards deli/cheese section
>butcher's counter on way
>heave in a few briskets, prime rib roasts, other expensive cuts of beef
>keep running to cheese
>frantically grab a massive parm wheel plus 1-2 other big cheeses
>check time
>plow through deli counter
>take deli slicer
>grab 1-2 full deli meats
>hop over to seafood
>last items are biggest peices of tuna and salmon I see

>>8716451
Hmm...
Mentlegen's shopping list:
>10-20 Seconds - Grab bags by the entrance and reach meat section swiping stuff along the way.
>15/20 to 40-50 Seconds - Clear meat section and the nearby rice and pasta shelfs, move to canned products section.
>45/50 to 65-75 Seconds - Clear canned products and sauces, move to fish section.
>70/80 to 95-105 Seconds - Clear fish section, move on. (Note that caviar is in there)
>100/110 to 120 Seconds - Swipe stuff from nearby ailses after throwing in the soft drinks.
Bretty Balanced, all things considered.

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>>8716451

Beer
Cheese
Detergent
Instant coffee
Shampoo
Soap
Spaghetti sauce
Various canned foods

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>>8716451
i head straight for these bitches and fill my cart with as much as it will hold - and walk out the store one rich ass motherfucker! hell yeah!

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>>8716872

>>8716872
excuse me, which aisle is the other in?

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>What do you head for first?

Meat and fish, grabbing as much peeled shrimp, salmon, lamb, and beef as I can.

>>8717457
i had so many fantasies about being on this show and shop til you drop