Chicago. How to Fuck Up Food: The City

>>8706113
>go to chicago
>order bowl of beans
>they're all chromed

what the hell

I've never been so I can't say anything good or bad about the place

>>8707229
Why post at all then

I lived there for a while and have to go there for work a few times a year. There are a few alright restaurants in the loop area if you really want to get obsessive and you scour eater and sites like that, but in general it's just midwest food with some extra mexican and asian joints. There are no good mexican and asian joints anywhere convenient, they're all like in pilsen or argyle or some crazy far flung place like that. And for the most part all the locals can seem to talk about is MUH CRAFT BEER and MUH DEEP FRIED PUB GRUB. There's an inordinate fascination with their own shitty fast food (portillos and so on). And they have this weird hostility towards their local specialty, the deep dish pizza, which is one of few things I particularly enjoy about the food scene there. The cocktail scene is basically TGI Friday's tier (like people are still drinking mojitos, except they're not even made with muddled mint), and the wine scene is about 15 years behind the times (think gruner and anything-but-chardonnay, if lucky, if unlucky they are unironically drinking full malo buttered popcorn bombs)

I can think of much worse flyover places to have to visit for work regularly, but it's still the capital of flyover land and it shows.

>>8707258
to point out the circlejerk is retarded you git. people shitting on something they've never even been exposed to is lame

>>8707265
And what makes you so sure people shitting on it have never been?

>>8706113
hot dogs are okay, italian beef is good

'a is the only flop

Chicago is certainly no Branson that's for true. Branson: the Foodie capital of America.

>>8707270
You make a good point, if you don't like (trivial thing related to the midwest) it means you hate America and have literally never even set foot here

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Hey hey HEY! Don't you say NOTHING bad about 'go!

>>8707338
the everything bagel of hot dogs, just awful.

>>8706113
I love Chicago food. Scouring Eater is one way to do it alright. But, remember where do Chicago's of class or money actually live? It's those neighborhoods you likely find the good stuff outside of the museums/shows/shopping districts in the Loop. I will say there's a hearty flyover dose to a lot of the restaurants in town, true, but every good neighborhood has a top 10 list that is actually pretty tops, which does put Chicago ahead of many other cities. I dare say it's not worth driving all over the place, just look up what is deemed to be good close to you.

I like the old decades old restaurants as much as the new trendy stuff and I do like to stay in the Loop where the hotel prices at the 4stars are so competitive and cheap! I'll try to hit a sausage lou malnati at least once, a trip to the Berghoff for delicious something off the old classic menu, one of the hot italian beefs near my hotel whichever of the top 3 places (nah on the hot dogs), always a bit of Rick Bayless, even if it's only a torta and guac in the terminal on my way out of town, and I love that there is a lot of craft food going on, preserved pickles, slow and low meats, like at The Publican and all of its clones.

Chicago is no D.C., but it's nothing to laugh at. There's a lot of mediocre stuff, just have to look for the rated food.

>>8707281
I've read this post 4-5 times now and it still doesn't make any sense

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>>8706113
I order cereal in chicago and they gave me this

>>8707365
It's a joke about flyover butthurt, you must be new here. If you don't like some shitty thing that a flyover land person thinks is the best thing ever (usually a regional fast food chain or some gastronomic abortion like "italian beef"), it means you've never set foot in America, are an OBSESSED europoor, and you literally hate America and all Americans.

>>8707338
I do love a good do' 'go

>>8707258
Ask OP the same question

>>8707341
lol at the idea that there is a non-awful hot dog
If you re in Chicago get a polish sausage or Milwaukee brat, don't eat a fucking hot dog like a child

>>8707497
This has literally never happened here

>>8706113
chicago is where food reaches its highest level
case in point: 'go 'za

>>8707534
Nah, I'm afraid you're incorrect. Haven't seen it so much in the last few years but it used to be a staple of midwest food threads.

>>8707258
Why do anything at all? Dumbass bitch.

>>8707542
Ok guy, keep whining about something that hasn't ever happened, solid contribution to the thread.

>>8707341
Everything bagels are good you prick

>>8707549
I already made my "solid contribution" if you want to get pissy about something else >>8707261


What have you contributed, other than meta-butthurt?

>>8707545
Wow man that's like soo deep lol

>>8707365
He's mocking butthurt midwesterners, saying that they would say that any criticism is un-American, bit he trips over himself a bit trying to sound smug. Not sure he rightquoted either.

>>8707565
that's what she said

>>8707566
He's a known coastie shitposter who really hates the upper midwest for some reason. He will claim he has lived in all sorts of places when convenient for his point, never actually revealing where he lives. Usually makes some weird and delusional argument clearly not based on reality and confusing to people familiar with the topic

>>8707566
>saying that they would say

Of course it's something they *would* say but it's also, almost verbatim, something they do say in /ck/ shit flinging threads.

I guess all the oldfags are gone though. You people probably weren't even around for HoF let alone Angie or Sceak.

>>8707497
That wasn't the point of the post. The point was if you have never eaten something it is asinine to pass judgement on it and you have 0 credibility in the discussion. If you go to Chicago and eat a 'go 'za and don't like it you are in an infinitely better position to discuss it than someone from NYC who's never been west of Hoboken. This has nothing to do with flyovers. I can't say British food sucks because I've never been there

>inb4 virgin boy eggs and poo wine are objectively nasty because yeah no shit

>>8707583
Oops spoke too soon, looks like we have one of the old butthurt WIDF right here >>8707577

Why were you pretending not to know what I was talking about?

>>8707497
>if you don't like trivial thing from midwest you must be from Europe
Too bad for you the american coasties are the ones shitposting about flyovers

>>8707585
Well, as I already said, I lived there for a bit and I have to go back there several times a year. But of course that's not good enough for the WIDF, if you don't think Portillos is the best thing ever it means you're lying about having lived anywhere and are clearly not based on reality or familiar with the topic.

some of you guys sound jealous. I'm sorry you don't live in a world class city with any ethnic food imaginable at your fingertips

http://andrewzimmern.com/2015/04/08/2015-munchies-award-winners/

>>8707597
Can you ever go a thread without making up a bunch of weird strawmen of what "people totally said to you once"

>>8707641
What strawmen? The second half of my post was basically your own words, typed exactly with a couple of pronouns changed for case. Are you feeling ok?

>>8707652
The strawman is "midwesterners all love Portillos and get mad if you don't"
Just some random thing you made up. They people say "what are you talking about" and you rant about flyovers and europe and shit

>>8707670
I don't know why we have to play this little tsun-tsun game every time, WIDF-kun. You always play dumb and then you go on again with the same old rant about how someone who doesn't feel EXACTLY the same way as you about some beer or some fast food joint cannot possibly have been within 2 or 3 light years of the glorious upper midwest and if they dare suggest otherwise they are obviously lying.

>>8707679
When have I ever expressed an opinion about a fast food joint?

>>8707694
It was just an example related to chicago since that is the topic of the thread after all. But usually your most extreme WIDF outrage is related to muh craft beer or muh cheese from the combination fireworks and porn shop. It usually assumes the following form:
>person: I don't like thing
>WIDF: well you obviously haven't ever been to glorious upper midwest
>person: well actually I have and I don't like thing
>WIDF: RRAWR I'm really confused because how can anyone have this opinion after having tasted or tried thing? they must obviously be trolling or insane

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>>8707341
>he doesn't like everything bagels

>>8707707
A made up example, which is what a strawman is. You make up a stance that is dumb and falsely attribute it to tear it down

No one has ever had these conversations with you

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>>8707730
Yes much like you had no idea what I was talking about until a third party came along and asked WTF the weird self-referential argument was about, at which point you broke character and revealed that you were fully aware of what was being discussed

You have to remain in character for this, and I give you credit for doing so

>>8707271
Italian beefs are shitty wet cheesesteaks at their best, the hot dogs suck unless you get them from one of two places in the city

The only truly Chicago thing that is good is the deep dish, but for some weird reason people who have never had it shit all over it.

>>8707742
You realize this site isn't just you and one other guy, right? I didn't even come upon the thread til midconversation
my first post here was this
>>8707534

>>8707605
>any ethnic food
Nope.
I went to this """"""""Hungarian""""""" place in Skokie and literally nothing there was even remotely Hungarian. Not a single thing. No one spoke Hungarian, either, and when I asked people about the owners, the name I was given wasn't Hungarian. Conclusion: not a single Hungarian is at all affiliated with this supposedly "Hungarian" grocery store and deli. All they had was Israeli shit. Hungarian Jews in Hungary still eat food that I can immediately recognize as Hungarian, but this joint didn't have anything recognizable at all.

I looked up online after and not a single Hungarian place anywhere in Chicago. Google recommended a Romanian place (Cafe Bucharest, IINM), but that place had nothing Hungarian, either. What they did have, however, was Serbian food. There were only three Romanian dishes on the menu of this supposedly Romanian restaurant.

So yeah. There's that.

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>>8707777
Nice quads, and I was starting to think the old WIDF guy had left /ck/ but much like Roger Rabbit when Judge Dredd knocks shave and a haircut, he pops out of the woodwork reliably when the honor of the upper midwest is at stake

>>8707784
It would be pretty fucking weird if the people that ran it weren't descended from Hungarian immigrants. Quite possibly 3rd generation by now though.
Also keep in mind that what was popular amongst Hungarians at the turn of the 20th century at peak immigration times that they brought o America might not reflect modern food trend in Hungary

Or maybe the place just sucked

>>8707784
Pretty sure I've been to the exact same place in Skokie. It's just classic flyover food, there are "Norwegian" places serving the exact same food, exact same decor, in Minnesota. Good stuff but if you were expecting authentic, of course, it's not.

In Ohio they call those places "Amish".

>>8707797
You just haven't raised any dumb arguments in cheese or beer threads I have been in recently

Also, its funny that you associate Wisconsin with things that are in border towns specifically for Illinois people

>>8707806
Looking it up, the place WAS Hungarian up until 1973, when some Czech Jew of Hungarian background bought it and threw out everything that made it Hungarian.

Dunno why they keep the word "Hungarian" in the name.

>>8707815
I was annoyed that for a deli store with the word "Hungarian" in the name, they had a pitiful selection of paprika. It was borderline offensive.

>>8707265
I'm not familiar with that word. I assume it's pronounced the same way as gif, correct?

>>8707205
Gotta have that bling, niggah!