HOW DO I OPEN THIS FUCKING THING

prepare for comfy cheif to show you all you need to know

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQU6o4ooL5E

>>8251943
The homemade ones are infinitely easier to open compared to the store-bought coconuts.

>>8251943
hammer or rolling pin
tap the side then turn it slightly
repeat until it opens

File: Sledgehammer.png (203KB, 977x851px) Image search: [Google]

203KB, 977x851px

>>8251943

>>8251943
I use a parang/machete. An axe can work too. Alternatively, a fixed vertical metal spike.

Machete, havnt you ever been to coconut country's?

>>8251959
haha that dude is intense

>>8252714
Samoan dudes tend to be like that, at least until they move to Hawaii and mellow out. I've noticed a similar thing happens to Maori dudes.

>>8251959
lol this guy is awesome

shoot it with a gun

File: coconut%20eyes[1].jpg (22KB, 489x326px) Image search: [Google]

22KB, 489x326px

What I do is drill out 2 of the eyes with a corkscrew, pour the coconut water into a cup, taste it to see if my coconut is rancid, wrap the coconut with a kitchen towel and bash with a hammer

Someone post the thing.

>>8252838

I know the thing, but, I do not have the thing.

Someone pls... the thing.

Bash with head repeatedly.

File: Opening a coconut.webm (3MB, 640x360px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 640x360px

This is what you wanted, right?

>>8252862
I was waiting for her to accidentally stab herself or cut her fingers off with that knife.

>>8251943
With a hammer.

>>8252507
Malaysians on ck?

What are you doing here la...

File: IMG_20150303_202551.jpg (1MB, 2448x3264px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 2448x3264px

I managed to break it by hitting it every day with my fist hammer-style a year ago. Took me arround two months and a lot of bruises tho

>>8251959
this dude looks like Kamehameha in Civ V
amazing

>>8252832
>bash
are people really that bad with tools? put it on concrete/stone solid surface, aim at the middle and it's one hit to crack it like an egg. it's doesn't need to explode in to pieces. You can finish the job by hand once you get the first crack.

>>8252862

jesus christ don't let that woman near a knife again