Eat cancer? (Cancer recipes?)

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>>8212705
I don't even know what to say
1/10 made me reply

>>8212719
I know it sounds stupid but I'm at a loss here and the only place I could think of that would give a good answer were here..

>>8212705
Just eat fast food everyday. Then you can eat your own cancer.

cancer is a disease, you mean you want to eat a tumor?

thats entirely dependent on what kind of tumor it is. A bone tumor would need to be cooked differently from a brain tumor

I hear that petri-dish beef is coming to market soon. Technically that's cancerous since the cells have been made to divide without end. Pretty expensive though, and only good in burgers or sausage since it doesn't have much texture or any fat.

>>8212737
Acquiring cancer would not be difficult. I mean it's so common nowadays and I have friend that is a oncologist.
But I don't know a way to cook it (if there is a way) and if it's safe to eat.

>>8212745
Yes a tumor my bad!
Yeah I thought about that to.. which makes my culinary quest harder
>>8212748
Interesting, but I will decline, It doesn't feel/sound the same

>>8212758
You could probably make a blood sausage from some sort of leukemia. Plus side there is you could dry it out and treat it with heat/UV to make sure all the cells are dead.
In fact, a lot of cancers (lung, bowel, prostate, ovarian) would be good for ground sausage since they're just lumps of organ meat more or less. My suggestion would be liver cancer though, and make a paté

>>8212799
Hm that's pretty interesting, next step would be to create a cancer farm where one can get naturally grown cancer

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>>8212975

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>>8212987
Laughed more then I like to admit.

>>8212975
There are lots of lab rats bred to have a high susceptibility to cancer for research purposes. They'd be easy to breed, easy to feed, just shoot some beta rays their way and sprinkle some aspartame on their food pellets.
Hardest part by far would be harvest.

Any sick ones having recipes?

>>8212705
Cancer is literally the Latin word for crab. So, yes... You can eat cancer.

>>8212719
they meant dump, this is talking about not dumping rubbish.

>>8212975
You mean 4chan?

>>8214314
If 4chan was edible I wonder how it would taste? As a Swed I'll bet it tastes kinda like really sour, bad lemons and surströmming (femented fish)

>>8214334
I think more like fermenting feces, dried semen mushrooms, breast milk cheese and bloody pus enfused vinegar.

Just eat some shitty minced meat and go fuck yourself

>>8214358
Jeez what twisted your tiny dick?

>>8212705
This is literally the plot to I, Haruspex.

>>8212730
Then you know it's a bad question

>>8212705
There was an episode on the X-files where some guy as killing people to eat their tumors

You could eat a tumor and not get cancer
It would be gross tho
It's just a uncontrolled growth of cells so it would be just fat or just muscle or something gross like that

>>8214996
Well you are a downer. If we solve this nobody will go hungry ever again!
Imagine how many people have cancer, it's practically a limitless food source!

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Ever heard of cancer cell lines? It's basically cancer in a bottle multiplying at incredible hihg speed if you keep it fed. You need to follow a few guidelines regarding storage and sterile work environment, but it would definitely be possible to keep a shitton of cancer bottles and take away some every other day, as long as you keep enough left to grow again.

As for the health issue: usually it shouldn't be dangerous at all to eat cancer, because your body can recognize foreign cells (if they even live) and kill them. Although it's technically possible that a cancer cell stops displaying any antigens that make it recognisable at the cell surface. I heard of these so called nude cells, apparently they can fuck you up. But I have no idea if anyone even works with those, so you should be good.

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I remember watching some tv show reporting on this boy with a giant mole that looked sort of like a turtle shell and I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to cut it off and prepare it.

>>8215995
Gold star for you laddie, this shits gold!

>>8214294
Did you come up with that by yourself?

this is lowkey the most fucked up board

>>8216041
Looks leathery as hell how would one go to make it more tender?

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>>8212705

>>8217717
I want to know how it would feel to braise it, roast it, grill it..

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>>8217742
Ay another cancer-bro for the feast! I shall prepare the tumors

>>8214564
nothin senpai

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If you ate tumors regularly wouldn't you build up resistance to that particular cancer?

>>8218496
No the only way to "resist" cancer is for your cells to stop replacing themselves.

>>8212705
You've probably already eaten cancer. Odds are at least one steak you ate had some cancer cells in it.

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Technically, Corn Smut is a plant cancer induced by a parasitic fungus.

>>8212705
Agreeing with previous replies you could eat a tumour and you would not get cancer OP.

HOwever no matter what type of tumour you choose I expect the texture and taste will be pretty awful, as cancer cells do not usually have the properties of the normal tissue. For example if you were to try and cook a myosarcoma (muscle cancer) it would not taste or feel like muscle.

T. medfag

You could eat a tumor, but depending on lots of factors such as the type of cell it derives from, the mutations it carries and the degree of growth, it could be some very bad quality meat.
Aggressive, fast-growing tumors tend to be necrotic in the inside.
Tumors also produce all kinds of endocrine perturbators which WILL fuck your glands up since you are made to be receptive to them.
Other than that, I guess a muscle tumor (rhabdomyosarcome) would be like a very chewy and weird-textured steak, but those are uncommon.

Overall if you pick your piece carefully you should be fine.
I guess there's a chance that, by not cooking your meat correctly and having a bleeding in your digestive tract, a single cell could avoid digestion, get in your blood flow, and find a nice little unguarded place (your brain) to colonize.

>>8218496
No, since the cells aren't absorbed by your body.

>>8214996
Cancer as a large mass is more than just fat cells, it needs a vascular system in order to grow large. It contains no bone, and isn't really muscle, but certainly would be meaty animal flesh, quite nutritious too because it contains the exact balance of what humans need.
People here routinely bring up tapeworms as a way to lose weight without cutting diet or doing exercise. But fast growing cancer would also work, and do so without introducing a foreign organism into our body. Cancer is after all, our own DNA and flesh, just with a mutation. The damaged DNA is not a food safety problem when cooked and eaten, so its quite edible, even if you eat someone else's cancer.
It would have a double benefit: the large rapidly growing mass would alleviate our weight gain concern, as all excess calories would be directed to the tumor mass, so we could eat as much as we want without wasting food. When the cancer mass reaches sufficient size, it could be amputated, and made into cruelty-free meat products. There is no ethical concern over consumption of your own cells. I've often thought of drawing pints of my own blood, in order to consume it, this would also have a weight loss effect while providing cruelty-free animal protein.
The future holds great promise in having engineered cancers tailored to our preferences, for instance, if you love steak, you can grow a well marbled beefy tumor on your leg, and harvest it each time it reaches 20 or 30 pounds. I volunteer for the first clinical trials once this becomes available, sign me up.

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mhhhhh teratomae

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>>8218652
Meh I've eaten haggis.

>>8218543
pls guys let's not encourage him

>>8218537
>For example if you were to try and cook a myosarcoma (muscle cancer) it would not taste or feel like muscle.
H-how do you know??

I've had this thought process too OP, I imagine it would taste like just shitty meat considering it's just a mass of tissue that doesn't really do anything

>>8214314
kek

>>8218652
what the fuck is that

>>8221156
A teratoma, obviously. A kind of tumor that usually appears capsule-like, filled with different tissues and similar stuff like hair, teeth, skin and stuff like that.

>>8212705
Print your own post and eat it

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cancer_(disambiguation)
scroll down

>>8214334
surrstromming is literally fermented fish but functionally it is soooooooomuch more than just that.
hell you cant fucking eat it inside

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>>8221448
>capsule filled with teeth

>>8218841
haggis doesn't have a pus explosion when you cut it retard

First I get persona v spoiled here, now this
I keep underestimating this board

>>8222739
Yeah, that nasty little cyst can be quite a bag full of surprise. They're usually fileld with hair and that yellow gel-like substance. Teeth, bone and even brain-like tissue are rarer, though.
They usually grow inside the testicles or ovaries. Don't worry, though. You have to be born with them if I remember that right.