Your Shittiest Cooking Moments

When I was about 13 I convinced my family to let me cook dinner, and thought clove=bulb of garlic. It took days for the smell to leave and burned your tongue.

but that's common as fuck if you're using a cheap rice cooker and don't add enough water.

You must be a pretty good or pretty boring chef, anon.

>>7618991
>be 13
>playing vanilla wow doing BFD
>put two Jamaican patties in the microwave for 30 minutes
>middle through instance I smell a burning
>whole upstairs is filled with dense smoke I cant see shit
>look at two patties, burnt black crisps that look like an atomic bomb hit
>parents come home and have to throw away the microwave
>whole house smells like smoke

>>7618991
Rinse your rice next time. At least twice.
Add enough water to go up to your first knuckle, no less.

>making brownies
>confuse teaspoon for tablespoon
>brownies typically have salt in them

classic

>>7618991
Cook it in a covered pot in the oven. Radiation heat from the elements not touching the container means more uniform cooking and no chance of scorching compared with convection cooking on the stove or in a rice cooker.

I've done the old "making caramel and forgot about it" fuckup and ruined a pot. And the counter. And the floor. (I panicked)

When I was 15 I tried making hamburgers while my parents were away for the weekend, I didn't realize you're not supposed to just turn the stove up as high as it'll go and throw a patty of unseasoned beef into it.

Probably lucky I didn't get sick from eating 2 charred on the outside, raw on the inside patties.

>>7618991
A common problem with the cookers is that they will burn the bottom layer, it's a faulty heat detection mechanism. Some people like the burnt rice though and eat it with sugar
it's gross

I was making soup for an old girlfriend since she was sick. My annoying room mate came in and started bugging/distracting me. I was too distracted to remind myself not to get "creative" like usual.

The soup was tar black. Had at least 2 cups of cinnamon in it, and I think there might have been an eggshell in it. It was vegetable soup. I did not feed it to her.

>>7619887

My fail is also wows fault.

>Find out about red velvet cake
>oh shit nigga ima make it
>use a box cake mix (white) and add red food coloring to it
>this is pink :c ill just add more till its red
>use prob half a bottle of food coloring
>do the same with storebought vanilla icing
>pop in oven
>Raided BT and did arena for a few hours.
> Get up to take a dump and remember that the cake was in there.
>Oddly enough it wasnt burnt per say, just browned.
> must be ok obv
> ice the whole thing
> eat a slice
>immediately puke
> go do some more arena in shame

>>7618991
I once tried to be creative and threw a sliced banana, brown sugar, and soy sauce in a pan.

This is not one of my brightest moments.

>>7622071
Sounds p. good, tb familial.