I'm at the hipster coffee shop!

Order a dehydrated milk, biscotti crusted, upside down mocha-frapa-espresso-chino

When they tell you they've never heard of it..
Smirk.
Put on your sunglasses.
Stand up.
And say, "It's pretty underground, that doesn't surprise me.", and just walk out.

>>7274912
gonna save this post for cringe threads, thanks lad

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No triggering alowed

>>7274911
u gonna fug that slute or wat. go on an clap dem cheeks boy

>>7274934
ask for coffee and say you're a construction site worker and are trigger by their constructophobia

>>7274912
>stand up

do you usually sit down while you order at a coffee shop?

>>7274912
I'd be embarrassed for posting this even ironically

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>>7275002
op please do this

>>7274912
I thought it was hilarious. These other faggots are hard to please.

>>7274934
What are blackguards?

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>>7274919
>BREAKヲAST

Who the fuck thought this was appropriate.

>>7275087
That's probably because you have a shit sense of humor.

That wasn't funny at all.

>>7275216
I was wondering that too and concluded it was a derivative of redguard (which means nigger).

>>7274934
Who the fuck sits in a coffee shop cat calling the people that come in?

>>7275252
Blackguards.

>>7275235
Actually, it wouldn't mean that he has a good sense of humor, but bad taste.

>>7275266
it would mean*

whoops

>>7274934
>blackguard
That's a lawsuit right there. You know some nigger is gonna take it the wrong way.

The hipster coffee shop near me brews the coffee one cup at a time in a beaker on a hot plate and it takes like 10 minutes for a single cup. Is this that kinda place?

>>7275340
Nah

The have drip, press and espresso. It's all pretty decent and doesn't take long to get your order.

>>7275307
The other sign says "Please don't be niggardly with your tips."

>>7275519
That means stingy.

>>7274912
>Stand up
Were you supposed to order sitting down? what the fuck

>>7275252
Noone. SJWs have a victim complex so they believe it's common

>>7275519
Avast! a niggardly blaggard

>>7275807
I wish this was true

It had become a very real problem. Some of the older dudes who hang on the patio and add booze to their coffee had been getting pretty lewd.

>>7275216
It's an old timey slang for disreputable person.

The person who wrote the sign probably felt a twinge of regret at having to write it, and thus added the word in order to lighten the mood.

>>7275532
Very good, anon. A gold star for you.

>>7274947
>>7274927
>>7274919
>>7274911
>>7274894
tbqh senpai, that looks more like a comfy divey coffee shop, the kind that was hip to make a splash in 1992, got an established client base, and never really cared to update itself

Which is fine, don't get the wrong idea. But I see nothing hip about the place. Monin syrup, urns, and sriracha means "we are not serious about coffee".

A hipster coffee shop would have a row of V60s in a glass rack with digital scales, a small breasted qt with arm tattoos and a lip ring ruining her otherwise pristine young body, a blinged out high end espresso machine in the most visually prominent location on the bar, a row of $3000 grinders, and no food or drink products that are not directly connected to coffee.

>>7275985
Shh, just let him be ignorant. It's for the best.

>>7276057
My mistake, I just looked it up, it's in Oklahoma, so add 20 years to the dates.

Some time around the year 2036, op will get a coffee shop like I described.

>>7275932
Balderdash