Online Lolita Comms: Grand Larceny

>>8725232
Way to ruin a decent thread.

>anon makes a new thread that isn't redundant
>a topic that people will actually respond to
>"THREAD MURDERER"

>>8725828 confirmed for salty cosplayer

>>8725839
> thread was made this morning
>previous thread wasn't dead
>was the first to reply late at night
>topic is about Lolita online communities


Yes I'm a cosplayer how did you know?

Make sure the thread doesn't focus too much on particular individuals and things about them that aren't lolita related, that's what got the last thread removed.

Also don't forget to censor names.

Basically the thread should be for discussing topics and posts made on the various online comms. Not singling out as one does on lolcow

I have no lolita friends and the closest comm is 4 hours away, so I was considering getting heavily invved in the online community to make friends. I wouldn't be shoving myself down anyone's throats, just posting coords on CoF and lolita related things on Tumblr. I might also do a YT channel since I have hauls every month. How does one do this without coming across as obnoxious or fake?

>>8726056
In lolita? It doesn't matter how you 'come across', people will attack the fuck out of you anyway. If you're prepared for that (but not getting wet by the idea of it like some e-fame hungry lolis) then there's definitely stuff you can do to be more likable.

1) Be yourself. Don't put on a fake voice or any of that bullshit. That's the number one thing that will make people absolutely hate your videos.
2) Talk about the details and things when you do a haul video. Say what you like about the dress and give honest first impressions, don't just show off how much stuff you can afford. People watch hauls for information.
3) Try to avoid commenting on drama at all. If you get posted on BTB, shrug it off and move on, don't make a video about it or respond to the thread unless you need to correct false accusations or something.
4) Try to make more than just haul videos and explaining things about lolita. There are enough of those. Like of course make them if they make you happy but also try other topics that will set you apart if you're serious about making a channel that other people would want to watch.
5) Start investing in things to make your videos better, but know that production is only important if you put a lot of time and effort into your work. Even if you have the best sound, camera and lighting if you're making the same boring, obnoxious videos as everyone else no one will care.

I feel like I could make a way longer laundry list of things you shouldn't do, lol.

>>8725232
still amazed that the accuser was blocked THEN her items were posted for sale and all of this happened AFTER the accused says "idk if your stuff is safe, new roommate"

god I hope this ends well and we can cleanse the online comms

>>8726056
I've been kind of doing that because I can't make meets, either, but am super shy online so it hasn't been working. I have noticed that Instagram is a pretty easy way to try and make friends, since it's easier to have a conversation in the comments than on Tumblr.

>>8726869
So shady. Lie after lie.

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This is seriously so embarrassing. I feel bad for the kid. I'm one of those people who usually doesn't give a fuck what others do, but holy shit don't make your kids suffer!

>>8727914
Whenever I see people post yoonique shit like this with poor spelling, I instantly imagine them as some sort of Maury/Jerry Springer-esque fat stripper.

>>8727914
>>8727925
If you are ashamed of lolita, with or without kids you shouldn't be in it. This kids is not 'suffering' either.

>>8727998
It's not the lolita part that's cringey, it's the fact that someone who types (and possibly reasons) like a ten-year-old child has a child of their own. Those don't look like ESL mistakes at all.

>>8727998
Oh I'm not ashamed at all. I like it and I wear what I want. However I wouldn't expose a child to that negative attention. Leave your crotchspawn at home Jesus Christ.

>>8727998
Oh please. She can wear it on her own time and not get her child negative attention bc of it. This reminds me of that episode of wife swap with that goth family who forced their kids to wear goth and wouldn't let the boys cut their hair and the kids were mercilessly teased. Leave your kids out of your alt fashion if they're not interested.

>>8728195
I'm imagining a mom lolita dressing her kid up as a tiny ouji and the kid not being impressed now.

>>8727914
>I'm one of those people who usually doesn't give a fuck what others do, but holy shit don't make your kids suffer!
Clearly you care quite a lot about what people do, given that you're upset enough about a mother wearing lolita to complain about it here. If the worst you can say about your mother is that you get embarrassed by people staring at her clothing, you've won the parent lottery. Seriously, this might be among the most ridiculous examples of "but think of the children!" I've seen.

Her typing would embarrass me more as her child, personally.

>>8728195
I'm not seeing how that's an accurate comparison in the slightest. She's not forcing her kid to wear it, she's just wearing it herself. If people side eye her for it, that's their problem. If her kid is embarrassed, he needs to get over it and stop caring about that shit. People will find anything to judge you for and anyone who looks different is going to get looked at. It's ridiculous to say parents should dress normal while with their kids to avoid embarrassment.

This woman isn't failing her child in any way what so ever, you're seriously overreacting. You come across as one of those high schoolers who complains about how awful parents are for shit like confiscating your iPod as punishment.

>>8728223
The kids were also made fun of because of the way their parents were dressed so yea it's accurate.

It's not ridiculous to say that you shouldn't bring unwanted negative attention to your child. How is this a crazy notion?

>>8728229
So, should people from other cultures not wear their uncommon clothing because their kids might get made fun of by bigots?

It's absolutely ridiculous because you're saying it's up to the parents to change their harmless behavior so their kids don't get embarrassed or teased. Parenting is about preparing your kid for the real world and the reality is that people are assholes and will judge you over stupid shit. Sheltering your kid from that does them no favors in the long run. My mom is black with a massive afro and used to dress like it was the 80's, kids gave me shit for it all the time in school. Of course I was embarrassed, but it taught me how to handle people being dicks over stupid shit and was far from traumatizing. Kids will pick in other kids for any reason they can find, regardless what them or their parents are doing.

>>8728229
See >>8728214
If the worst you do as a parent is embarrass your kid with your clothes, you're doing better than the vast majority of them and your child has nothing valid to complain about.

>>8728253
Exactly, kids will be made fun of for literally everything, so why exacerbate the problem? You can teach them all that shit without contributing to the problem.

Anyway if you want to embarrass your kid to teach them about the world ok fine whatever, I just don't agree and that's all there is to it

>>8728214
this type of behavior can lead to children's social anxiety or lack of social skills, it isnt the worst parenting in the world but it could be hindering the childs development in certain ways (like that goth family >>8728195
)

>>8728264
Because by doing that, you're teaching them that it's better to cater to the people judging you. Actions speak louder than words. You can say whatever you want to them, but if you change your behavior for other people then nothing you tell them is going to matter or resonate. Getting teased for stupid shit is part of reality and how people become stronger. Because of the shit I got from school for any reason people could think of, wearing lolita was effortless for me. I never once felt awkward or embarrassed because my upbringing was centered around not giving a fuck about what idiots think.

And you completely dodged the question about people who wear weird shit because of their culture. That's pretty telling.

Cool, some of you want overly sheltered thin skinned children, while the rest are totally fine embarassing their kids. Can this stop being a parenting debate thread now?

>>8728283
I just don't give enough of a shit to keep arguing about this.

back to posting on topic... does your local comms FB group have lots of discussion, or is it basicially used just as a place for planning meetups?
old one always had like weekly discussions, but new one is dead except for meetups which don't happen often anyways.

>>8728317
Then why bother replying? Just shut up.

>>8728379
No u

>>8728332
I've tried to get discussions going or share releases, sales, etc. Unfortunately, everyone is just an uptight bitch in my comm. They'd rather complain that our group is boring than actually participate in making it fun. And no, a lot of my comm members are total pleebs so they aren't up to date on most lolita news.

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God this bitch is dumb and obnoxious.

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Came across photos of my old comm from a very recent meet.

I am feeling so underwhelmed.

>>8731803
>honest and black owned
Let's not start an argument about race, but wow, people actually talk like that?

>>8731980
In their defence they invited the goth community as well.

>>8731980
Damn, not a single person looks put together...

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>>8731980
kek

>>8732079
Pretty sure those are just goths?

>>8731803
I hate her. She is always out to be the edgiest bitch on the playground and it's so fucking annoying.

>>8731803
Oh the shame and horror it must be to *gasp!* not the be the first owner of a lolita store in Houston!

And this >>8732003. What does being black and owning a business for a niche fashion has to do with anything??? It's not like people will pay attention to a store just because of your race t.b.h.

>>8732142
>It's not like people will pay attention to a store just because of your race
And if they do, they should be ashamed. That's a really racist and pathetic thing to do.

>>8731803
kek what an edgelord

>>8731980
All I see are goths, itas, and one... soccer mom wearing lolita?

>>8732079
>bare feet
pls

>>8732155
I do for hair products, but that's a totally different ball game desu

>>8732003
reminds me of chris-chan

>>8731980
i was almost gonna judge you for posting a photo of your own comm, but.. damn. This is awful.

>>8732179
That's relevant though.
I can understand when it is something like Native crafts or black hair products, but when it's something that isn't even from someones culture and they're like "ITS OWNED BY A BLACK PERSON YOU SHOULD SHOP THERE" for Japanese products, it's like wtf.

>>8726056

There are ways to do it but of course you'll still get some criticism and hate if you become remotely popular. I'd say both Lovelylor and Peachie do a good job with being online lolita. When people do dislike them you generally hear its just from their personal taste and not drama or attitude problems from either.

>>8731980
Holy shit, anon. They look terrifying.

>>8732003
Anon you have to choose to shop at black owned stores first. Or else you're racist.

>>8731803
Ok, I'm not american so forgive me, but why should I care if a business is black owned or not ? Should I boycott evil whitey business ? Is black owned inherently better ? And what about asians ?

>>8732317
You shouldn't care, that girl is just an obnoxious cunt in every thread she posts in.

>>8731803

On a related question, how is emailing the mayor supposed to do anything? To my knowledge, there's nothing that bars them from setting up this business that warrants any pressure from the mayor. If anything, I guess they could pass it on to the DA but I'm sure they have a lot of substantial work already

I hate the online lolita comms. I hate facebook and I hate 4chan. I know others have complained about this too but when are we going to move on from these places?

>>8732317
You should care when you need to find a kickass wig

>>8732449
I either want to go back to LJ or find something better. I feel like it's harder to make online Lolita friends (which is surely part of the idea of having online comms?) since we left LJ, it felt more personal back then. I feel like you can't really make friends outside your own comm unless you go to events or are really lucky online.

I'm just not sure what we could do. Forums are outdated, and even though lots of people want to go back to LJ, nobody will.

>>8732455
Lately some people have been trying to make lj work, but I think we need a new place.

The thing with cgl is that you don't know if the person giving you advice is a complete ita or the same person who called you a faggot or autist in another threat

And the facebook community is just too scattered, it doesn't feel like a community at all.

>>8732462
>The thing with cgl is that you don't know if the person giving you advice is a complete ita or the same person who called you a faggot or autist in another threat

This 100%. I like the idea of identity within an online comm, but I also feel like the fb groups are almost too much because our actual profiles are linked to what we do in the groups. I saw that /r/Lolita is really starting to pick up, but that's still not really what we need (though it could be useful).

>>8732449
Everyone is saying this, but no one does anything.

>>8731980
With some of them I can hardly tell if they're making a stupid face or are genuinely that unfortunate.

What is wrong with lolibrary? If feels like every time I want to use it, it's not working. Is there any alternative to lolibrary?

>>8732466
I wish more people were making an effort to pick up r/Lolita because I think it could be a decent alternative for now.

>>8732449
>>8732455
Myself and few others are trying to make a forum that is a nice middle ground with the option of being anon (just a username) or tying in your social media. It will be way more lax involving topics/people that can be discussed but also have some rules to prevent absolute shitposting. It is currently in the works but if anyone is interested in contributing it will make the process speed up.

>>8728195
>wat is reality tv

>>8732086
No, we don't want them either. Let the weaboos have their ugly asses.

>>8731980
Huh. That girl in yellow looks just like a girl I vaguely know from math classes in college.

>>8726877
same here. I thought my social anxiety wouldn't cross over to the internet but unfortunately I was wrong. I wish I could make friends easier

>>8732452
I second that notion.

>>8732455
>>8732462
>or find something better
>Dreamwidth

>>8732462
>or the same person who called you a faggot or autist in another threat

I personally like this aspect, actually. Sometimes people you dislike or don't get along with have a good point - but oftentimes personal bias against them will colour what they have to say.
Since no one can reliably keep track of anyone else here, people won't just be dismissing the valid points of others because of personal issues. We'll dismiss it for other stupid reasons probably, but at least that one is eliminated.

kinda OT though.

I do see your point about it not feeling like a community anymore. Posting honestly and openly on FB is scarier than it was on LJ as well. For one, there were fewer SJWs then, and it was more difficult to constantly hound people and send brigades after them than it is on FB, since everyone's real lives were less closely tied to their LJ accts.

>>8728332
Our comm is huge but there's surprisingly little conversation on the comm page. Most of it just happens on people's personal pages.

>>8732446
I'm surprised the mayor's office didn't laugh at her.

>>8732462
I have fuck horrible social skills, and honestly I prefer talking to other lolitas on /cgl/. If I something I say is taken the wrong way or sounds dumb, I can just move on instead of people looking at me funny. You also don't have to worry about any personal issues between you and another person. It has its upsides.

>>8735384
Same. I'll get salted in one thread, then keked in another. Usually if I post something I suspect will garner salt, I just stop going into the thread until it is remade. I prefer cgl because it appeals to my antisocial personality.

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When someone comes into the advice group and says "oh it's totally fine to not wear a petti!". Doesn't. Even. Wear. Lolita.

>>8735384
I like to ask dumb shit on cgl rather than Facebook so I don't end up being posted here anyways. Either way it's coming back here, might as well not put my name on it.

>>8735017
I dont really respect the opinion of people who call others faggot or autist as an insult tough. Not even a SWJ I just hate how people on here are trying to be so edgy and rude.

>>8731803
>someone made it/did it before me in lolita therefore I cannot do it too
There's always that one person.

The black owned part just baffles me. Someone needs to tell her to replace it with white to see how cringey it is.

>>8726080
>2) Talk about the details and things when you do a haul video. Say what you like about the dress and give honest first impressions, don't just show off how much stuff you can afford. People watch hauls for information

This point is so important, it's the defining factor between 'good' and 'bad/boring' haul videos to me. I really want to see details of the dress and maybe some up-close detail shots, that's way more important to me than the unboxing part.

I'd love to see your laundry list of things not to do for YT videos, anon

>>8731980
The brolita (?) in red in the middle row could be decent with some grooming and styling changes. And makeup, definitely makeup.

>>8732449
The comms will move from here and FB once there *are* other options. FB in particular I feel like everyone, normies included, is over, but there are no alternatives yet that seem workable, so everyone's still there.

>>8732870
I agree that r/lolita could be a nice alternative to facebook in particular, even though I'm not a huge reddit fan.

>>8735384
I like this aspect of 4chan as well.

>>8735924
Adding, don't sit there and talk for five minutes about what a bloodbath the reservation was, or other shit with the box in your lap. If you're going to do an unboxing, do the unboxing.

I rarely watch lolita unboxings because they often involved an "opening" of self-indulgent blabbing about shit unrelated to whatever's in the box.

>>8732462
>>8732466
On LJ whenever a newbie asked for advice the person who always jumped in was Tiferet. you aren't always going to get quality feedback, regardless of the platform. Just because there's an ID behind it doesn't mean that person gives good advice or doesn't shit talk/post you to BtB behind your back.

>>8735976
True enough. But with an ID on, you can at least look up that person's other posts and so on, to see how valid the advice is. It's also easier to call people out on bad advice if their name is attached, because you can spot repeat offenders.

>>8733801
I could probably help some. What do you need anon?

What would you do a complete ita became a mod of your community?

>>8728275
Moms wearing alt fashion causes social anxiety in children? And from what recess in your ass did you pull that out of?

>>8736085
Thanks for letting me know! Feel free to drop me a line at the email above and I can fill you in! If you decide not to participate after hearing the details that is totally fine too. Things are a bit slow right now because of the holidays but plans are in motion!

>>8736142
Nothing, you sound like an idiot btw

>>8736142
I s2g if this is AZ again

>>8734988
Lol this

But I feel like DW's scene isn't really the same as LJ was anymore. LJ was all cranky older geeks who generally had some level of common sense, of course you had some level of crazies but you get that in all fandom communities. DW is all plurk people so basically the same as tumblr, just trends older. The RP community's face in particular has changed vastly since the influx of tumblr people over the past few years.

>>8735916
Way to totally miss the point.

>>8735977
That was basically impossible to do on LJ though. There's no way to view all a user's posts like there is on a forum, and the search function on LJ is famously bad. And do you honestly think a newb is going to do that anyway? If they're too dim to research the question themselves, they're not going to factcheck every reply they get either.

>>8736142
Wait until she steps down. We had a similar situation in my comm and the girl was smart enough to realize she wasn't qualified and stepped down within a month.

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why do furries have to include this shit in fucking everything they do. no one gives a shit that you think you're an anthropomorphic cat or wolf or bunny or whatever jfc

>>8738388
Didn't someone post about something similar before? Some furry wanted to go to a meet wearing her fursuit head and the only lolita item she had was a hairbow.

>>8736875
Yea 95% of DW is plurk/rp, and it's a little disappointing when I have to go back to LJ for lolita-related things when LJ is such a shithole. I gave up and just stuck primarily to Facebook.

>>8738512
>plurk
I just got this because a friend uses it and I heard how it's so social for cosplayers, roleplayers, and lolitas but I haven't seen anything social at all. Maybe I'm just missing something but I assumed once you signed up you'd be able to find other people with similar interests through it.

>>8738512
Yeah, I mean don't get me wrong, I was in the RP community for a long time, even after the move to DW, but I stayed on LJ for egl and then left when egl slowed down like everyone else. DW isn't really used for actual journaling/social media like LJ was, though, and since egl missed the boat to jump ship to DW during the time when everyone was doing so, I think it's way too late to get the community to move there now.

>>8738546
OT but nope. Plurk is 100% circlejerk all the time. If you don't already have a bunch of friends on there, there's no point in getting it.

>>8738690
I used to be in the RP community too and I really hated feeling like I had to be on Plurk constantly to keep up.

>>8728275
You're an idiot.

>>8738892
Yup, that's basically why I quit. My best friends are still in the community but I can't put up with it anymore especially since I don't even have time to tag anything but our private musebox stuff anymore.

>>8738507
yea, it's in the mail horror story by mistake right now >>8723911

>>8739225
Nah it's alright, anon. It's in the sales horror, not mail horror.

>>8727914
Uhh my dada was super into the metal scene and dress pretty out there and it didn't affect my self esteem whatsoever. In fact, I looked up his style and grew up very accepting of peoples personal style....so idk what you're on about.

>>8727914
>honastly
>ignor
>aslong
>unwarrented
???

>>8740086
You must be 18 years old to use this site

are you guys reading the thread on RC:U about how "Lady Lolita Jenny" requested to join?

He's baaaaaaaack

>>8744480
are you guys seeing that dumb bitch defending him lol "but this is a support group!!!!" no it fuckin aint

>>8744526
She's defending him unnecessarily, but the "this is a support group" comment was in regards to the titles of a few of his videos, not her implying that RC Uncensored itself is a support group.

>>8744480
Wait, who now? What did he do previously?

>>8744671
Search for brolitajenny in the archives, anon. You're in for a wild ride.

>>8744480
Oh my god, can that Rora chick fuck off?

>>8744755
IKR like oh jesus no one fucking gives a shit about sissies stfu

WHY do people feel the need to pipe up and talk about their fetishes? When did this become okay? It's sickening and should be left with yourself or your partners and not on Facebook. JFC.

>>8744835
It's easy to just blame tumblr so let's just blame tumblr.

No but for real though, the way the kink community has developed on places like tumblr has to have contributed to this shit. If you say you don't like something or don't want to know about something suddenly you're "kinkshaming" and ~literal trash~. So many people think being ~sex positive means constantly talking about sex your life whether or not it's appropriate within the context of the situation and it's really fucking annoying. Unless someone explicitly asked you I can guarantee you that no one fucking gives a shit about your sex life, no matter how kinky or vanilla it is. Kink people are the worse because so many of them think they're super special snowflakes for it though. Tons of us have kinks and fetishes but plenty of us understand that not everyone wants to fucking hear about it.

>>8744867
I wouldn't blame tumblr directly for that tho. If someone talks openly about their kinks on their kink blog while reposting other kink tumblrites, that's fine, because that's a closed shop. It's basically the same as the alt.sex newsgroups back in the day.

The real issue is that ever since social networking broke down the barrier between people's public and online persona, it seems like nobody has any concept of keeping things private anymore!

>>8744943
I've lost count of the number of times that I've had people tell me really personal things really quickly after meeting me in the past five years or so. I've always assumed this is a mix of the social media situation you've mentioned, and the increased drive for efame within lolita and cosplay in that same timeframe.

One girl told me all about the affair she had with another lolita's boyfriend. Another told me about her brother's battle with drug addiction. A third went on a rant about how itchy a certain rather private piercing was in the middle of morning tea.

These aren't necessarily things I'd mind talking to people about once I know them, but goddamn. We just met. You don't know me. I'm only getting to know you. Do you really have to put it all out in the open right off the bat?!

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this is so cringe

>>8746096
how old is she?

>>8746096
This makes me uncomfortable. It sounds like this chick just wants to complain about not having money for a niche fashion and wants to latch onto a new "aesthetic" to latch onto. It's just a fashion but it's a fashion with a set of rules. And JFC "loli life" ugh.

>>8746096
What the fuck lmao shut up child

>>8746096
Loki isn't the "God of Chaos" in mythological terms (Known as God of Fire, and called a trickster, or sometimes God of Mischief, but this is debated).
There's more cringe to pick out but that caught my eye quickly because she sounds like one of my students that take one thing from pop culture and use only wiki as a source.

>>8744959
The issue with privacy is that people find out you have one niche thing in common (lolita, cosplay, etc.) and like you said,they just go spilling all kinds of private things.
I've recently become quite private with my life because frankly, it's no one's business and I have my select few people that know certain things. I didn't realize how angry it made some of these people that I don't share a bunch. I'm not here to share my life story, I'm here to look pretty for a day and wear a damn coord.

>>8746096
Ehh, stupid teenagers are going to be stupid teenagers. I feel a bit sorry for her, this is going to be embarrassing to look back on.

>>8731803
Naaaah not dumb nor obnoxious-nor racist if you truly get to know me. Also when I say "black owned and honest", I think many of you seriously misunderstood the meaning of what I meant. Shit, all you had to do is ask.

>>8746096
>dress like a boy and give myself fake facial hair

... can't tell if tumblr or troll.

>>8746439
Lol. No. You are fucking annoying, cringey as hell, and have on other occaisions raised eyebrows. You act like a high school freshman always trying to grab attention and be as dramatic as possible.

Also I couldn't give to fucking shits what color a business owner is. The proper thing to say is just an honest business. Its stupid to bring race into business. The only exceptions are salons catering to certain races and specifically ethnic stores. A clothing store? No. One. Cares.

>>8746096
I hate kids.
I know they have to do dumb shit to learn, and I know I did dumb shit too, but I just hate them.

>>8746458
You never really asked what I meant, all you're doing is barking at me, that's all I'm getting from you. But that's fine, its always the ones that wont dare say how they feel to my face but instead hide behind their screen. Eh, life goes on anon.. it goes on.

>>8728195
>tfw all you want is to raise your daughter to be salty, clever rori who don't need no man
>tfw that means she'll probably wind up being a basic bitch stripper

>>8728317
>I can't think of a point better than yours

>>8746439
>I think many of you seriously misunderstood the meaning of what I meant.

Then what on earth did you mean other than unnecessarily bringing your race into the sales equation? Tons of black lolitas sell independently without making mention of their color, and even if it's about being one of ~the firsts~ I'm pretty sure meow_tan in NY also beat you to the punch, since she's half black as well and has had a physical shop for quite a spell.

>>8746096
>enormous tits
>i put on a tee and draw stubble teehee like a boy

yeah ok

>>8728195
I remember that episode, I know the show really gets them to exaggerate but that was so bizarrely unfair and hypocritical of the parents.
I think it's ok to subject your kids to the dumb things you like as long as it's nothing creepy, but only until they decide they don't like it.

>>8746477
You never know what you're going to get, I got raised by my metalhead parents to be a the power feminist career girl to raise hell, but then somehow I ended up wearing classic, baking and just wishing I had a little home to scrapbook in. Fortunately the feminism hasn't left me, so there's hope. Just give your kids the tools and hope they use them, right?

>>8746484
(Sorry my computer is lagged up) No no no, its not about who was the first, its not about who beats who at what its about the amount of hard work and how much you put into it. And that's awesome I actually didn't know about meow_tan till just now, best of luck to her. Only reason why I was upset about that store opening is because Lord knows they don't deserve that (with the theft issue), and its something I'm trying to work so hard for. Its a dishonest business, i'm saying that my business in particular will be honest, it'll be built from my blood sweat and tears. This is something that this little black girl right here wants. This is what I meant by honest and black owned, honey look who'll be running it? Its self explanatory yall and its not even meant to be racist, jeez laweez if you were concerned so much you could of just asked, you still can?? You want someone else to explain it to you that's fine, that's on you. I understand sometimes the way I say things may come off as strange to some but damn yall are callin' me shit and don't even know me or my intentions.

>>8746556
okay thanks for trying to clear things up but honestly you're just embarrassing yourself now.

>>8746556
Why does your race matter though

>>8746476
What did you mean by honest and black-owned?
Please explain.

Because it looks like you're implying that either
1. people give a shit about who owns the store
or
2. most other black-owned stores aren't honest, but this one is

>>8746621
Its fine if you guys don't understand what I mean, I tried explaining to the best of my ability. Its fine, but at the end of the day I have a goal to stick to and that's whats most important at this point.

>>8746621
is the fact that a store is "black-owned" meaningful outside the internet? I only ever see that term used on tumblr when people are trying to promote their shitty etsy or storenvy shops.

>>8746638

I've seen it used outside of the interblagz, but only in an Oprah-esque setting.

>>8746635
>I tried explaining to the best of my ability

All you did was repeat what you said in the thread, and added that you're hard working and got melodramatic that people are questioning you.

How is that "explaining" anything?

>>8746635
But why did you say it was black owned

>>8746556
>it's not about race

Yeah you say that, but what would your impression be if someone said they wanted an "white owned and honest" business? Be real here. You wouldn't be thinking "Aw white girl following her dream" you'd think white girl bringing up her race and implying other race owned businesses must not be doing as well.

Don't get mad at others when your "intent" is ambiguous, at best.

>>8746556

No one cares if a jfashion store is owned by someone who is black, asian, latino, white, and whatever else. It's a jfashion store that carries a style that is from japan and nothing else. It's one thing if the store was for something like hair products for certain types of hair or jewelry/cultural items from a certain type of race or culture but you are trying to push something that it totally irrelevant that people are stating that makes no sense to something like a jfashion shop

>>8746635
>but at the end of the day I have a goal to stick to and that's whats most important at this point.

ohhhhh my godddd then shut the fuck up and just go focus on your business and stop because this is really cringey. honestly you tried to explain yourself, fine, go home, do your thing, focus on your business, stop trying to defend yourself on an anonymous internet forum. if you're gonna be a business owner you're can't go back and forth with people like this

>>8746556
>expecting to be able to run a successful store with this cringey personality, and alienating other lolitas who would buy from such a store while you're at it

>>8746439
Your throwing a tantrum about how they are stealing "your idea" to open a lolita shop when you are nowhere close to opening a shop, nor do you have any means of actually doing it. Shoud I be pissed off and angry and throw a fit on the internet the next time a new cute cafe opens up because they stole my idea and are taking business away from me, if i had any business with my own cafe that i have ne funds or means of opening up myself?

You are cringy as fuck. I am embarassed to be in the same community as you. And that exchange you had with several members over that girl asking if anyone wanted to meet up at AM was horrifically embarassing as well.

>>8731803
Holy fuck everyone know's the owner is Nigerian right?

Honestly, if you care about race and who owns a store...

John is 1/2 Nigerian. So yea, his store is black owned. And his wife owns it too. So it's woman owned. And she was born in Vietnam so it's immigrant Owned.

What's your point again?

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>>8746556
>>8746439
>>8731803
>tfw part of this bitch's comm.

This girl in my comm posted on the Facebook page asking for advice on buying a dress because the seller priced it above retail and she's all pissy about how unfair it is. It's even funnier when the exact same dress has been sold for about the same price previously. Supply and demand bitch.

>>8748092
Is the one about the Haenuli Jellyfish Princess dress?

>>8748101
No, it's an AATP dress

>>8748092
She's new. Give her a break. She's not really gotten into buying brand yet and how the whole supply and demand thing works out. I remember balking at the costs of new releases immediately after. I learned that if I wanted it then, you'd better jump on the release, cough up the dough, or wait it out and hope you're in the right place at the right time when it goes up for a good price.

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is this bitch for real

>>8748540
Yup. Last month she messaged me asking to trade Sugary Carnival for her replica on lm

>>8748540
>>8749969
Reminds me of the lolita who wanted to trade her Bodyline for brand.

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I can't see this thread going anywhere except for accusations of sugar daddies and spending your parents' money based on the replies already made.

>>8750727
Deleted before I'd even finished posting the screencap. Wow.

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Did anyone else catch this? Baleeted before it went very far, but she'd already started to go batshit in the comments when people told her posting this was a bad idea.

>>8751029
Yes oh my god, what a mental case. She started accusing one of the girls in the comments of posting it and everything.

>>8751032
Did you get caps? I stupidly refreshed before capping the situation so far.

>>8751035
I didn't, unfortunately. I refreshed to see if anything new had been posted in the comments (my facebook doesn't auto-update for some reason) and it was gone.

>>8751029
Gotta love how she's also breaking the LM no-print-replica rule and still trying to defend herself.

>>8751029
Aaaahaha, she just publicly admitted on facebook that she knowingly bought a replica, which is against international law.

The idiocy of this reminds me of those guys who get arrested because they post on facebook the amount of pot they scored.

>>8751075
a-anon, she's probably not going to get arrested for buying a replica. If the law was actually that strict there wouldn't be so many replica-chans in the first place.

>>8751029
I got the comments too, there in the WTF sales 2 thread

>>8751035
I got the comment caps, and when she replied to a different thread calling her an asshole

>>8751076
Of course it will not make her go to jail. But many fashion communities shun members who buy replicas. She just re-broadcast the damning info for lolitas who were part of Rufflechat but didn't read BtB.

>>8751130
Did she post somewhere besides UC?

I don't think so. Just Rc

>>8751029
Apparently she flounced. She pmed me asking me to delete the new post. I don't know what she expected.

>>8731980
>jelly shoes

>>8746556
If it's not about race, why the fuck do you keep mentioning it. Like over and over.
There is no need to keep bringing it up that you are black.
Most of us don't give a shit about what race a store owner is, keep that race bullshit out of Lolita please.

>>8748540
She also tried this shit with authenic Meta swan lake ffs. And the seller was leaving Lolita as well.

>>8748540
This. Trade an Innocent World dress for her replica. Good luck on life.

>>8751139
Yeah, but even then there are so many Lolitas who turn a blind eye to replicas. I wish they would be banned across the board but her attitude is the only thing that's going to get her a bad name, not her replica-buying.

>>8746556
Isn't it kind of inappropriate of you to create a store selling cultural items from a much smaller minority (asian americans, Japanese Americans in particular) and then claiming it's "black owned"?

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Why was she kicked from her local comm again? She seems like such a sweetheart!

>>8752348
I really wish there was a global community blacklist for people who have been kicked out of communities.

>>8752350
That is a really brilliant idea honestly. It could save future comms a lot of drama if they could do a "background check" prior to allowing a new member in.

This seems like as good of a place to ask as any. I got the idea from the lolitas in the workforce thread and did some looking around on facebook. There doesn't seem to be a group for lolitas who are active duty military or who are dependents/married to active duty, etc. Would any lolis be interested in an online comm for girls who are constantly traveling the world for their job/their spouses job?
I'm thinking it would be a great way to find other frillbutts who are on the base they're moving to,etc

>>8752348
Well it was up longer then i thought it would be. Did anyone call her out? Last i saw there were 4 likes and one comment. Too bad i didnt have the chance to see who liked that post. I would of added them to my no sale/trade list

>>8752373
There would have to be some sort of neutral ground where that kind of information could be available. It wouldn't be a free-for-all, people posted to it would be those where there is no doubt about the person being trouble. I'd be willing to set up something like that anonymously, I'm always worried about some nutcases our comm dealt with worming their way into other communities and vice versa.

It could be called something simple like EGL Blacklist?

>>8752426
Hell, thinking now, it could even be something as simple as a google doc.

>>8752348
>>8752350
What's the story with her?

>>8746476

>You never asked
>proceeds to not explain when having a full text box to do so

>>8746556

>takes japanese fashion inspired by european designs
>literally no one cares who owns a shop
>black owned is somehow a selling point???

>>8746635
>I tried explaining to the best of my ability.

Do you have the ability of a parrot? Because all you've done is repeat the same sentence.

We get you're black. We understand you will eventually own a store. We are confused why you thing you being black is relevant information to your store.

>>8752426
Make a burner gmail and host it as a Google spreadsheet so you could list their nickname, region, offenses, ect. Then you could use google forms to make a "submission form" for people to fill out when they ban someone and add them to the list

>>8732870
>>8735942
r/lolita has improved a lot since the last time I checked it. I might make a point of posting/commenting there more just to try to build some momentum.

voat is another alternative if the hate is for reddit in particular

>>8752440
Check the archives newfriend

>>8752488
Check for who??? Not that anon but it's not helpful at all to just say "check the archives" if all you have to identify someone is a tiny profile picture.

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>>8752426
My biggest concern with something like this is that someone could easily just lie if they had a vendetta and get someone blacklisted.

>>8752493
Different Anon, but thats Dominique. Shes well known around here as a major shit stirring, radical vegan activist cunt with a holier then though attitude. Since being booted from her local comm she's gone on to post things from time to time about filing paypal disputes or getting charge backs on her card because she doesnt want to wait for things to go through customs and is a general lolcow

>>8752494
Yeah, I like the idea but I would like to know what the procedure is for putting people on the list. Like what sort of evidence/reasoning and exactly what the standards are. Also, what about people who are not technically banned but have left on their own accord? Are you just gonna add people who seem to be a definite threat? Some people may be banned or leave comms on their own but are not an inherent threat to the community as opposed to like shitstirrers and predators or thieves/scammers. Someone may be banned, but they may just end up having nothing to do with the lolita community anymore. If someone does this, they need to decide what the grounds will be for adding people to the list and how to screen entries because I can definitely see some corrupted comm mods trying to twist drama around to harass a member they've wrongly kicked out or made to leave.

Perhaps instead of a blacklist (which implies like, do not have anything to do with this person whatsoever) it could be "watchlist" as well. Or, have two separate lists, one for people who may need to just be looked out for due to past behavior and one where people should definitely be avoided. Again my biggest concern is the potential for drama in regards to this though.

>>8752348
Fuck i always miss this shit. Did someone chew her out?

>>8752494

This, I left a comm on my own because I was unhappy with some stuff but the mod started telling people I had been banned/kicked out when I hadn't; I'd chosen to leave.

>>8752537
Which comm?

I decided to go ahead and create the ban/black list. I guess this will work as a sort of beta and we'll see how much drama comes out of this.

Contact me at [email protected] stating name, online alias if they have one, offence and the comm they're banned from so I can start adding people to the spreadsheet.

>>8752545
imo you should also require some sort of proof. i.e. if someone says someone got banned for harassment, they need to show caps of that or something, just in case you have a vendetta like >>8752537

>>8752545
Bless you anon for doing mana's work

>>8752399
Please dear god make this a reality!!! I just married a military man, am not used to the lifestyle at all, and am deathly afraid of pcsing to new states and trying to find a community. I'd love an online one so I don't feel as fish out of water-like

>>8752574

That's a good idea, I'll request proof from people who contact me. I don't know how many people will contact me, or whether the lack of anonymity (unless they're willing to make a throwaway email.) will scare them off.

Actually thinking about it, I could have a way of marking proven blacklists as proven, and ones with no proof as unproven/dubious to keep things clear and keep the list updated without waiting around for people to get screencaps. Or on issues where people don't have the caps any more.

>>8752486
Voat is a shithole tho. It's like reddit, except more white supremacists and people who are obsessed with hating fat people.

>>8752545
>>8752586
Something you might be able to do with spreadsheets is color code the backgrounds of records (the row where an individual's name appears) so that different colors mean different things

For instance red for people who are blacklisted, yellow for dramatic/annoying people and eventually green for people who've changed their ways and improved. I think that would be better than making a completely new table for each category.

And for now just keep the moderation to yourself. Once the list is populated enough you could get more administrators from different time zones and comms

>>8752597
As an old school cool lolita, this is a terrible idea.The power to list people as banned or not, airing out their dirty laundry to "prove" you have a cause to black list them for everyone to see. Bringing vendettas and private dramas to the forefront whenever someone comes with a vendetta? I don't know why anyone would willingly take on this burden unless that person wants an incredible amount of power over the community (a stunt I've seen before).

>>8752486
You're kidding, right? I hate how every fucking coord gets its own thread there. I just don't want to open a separate thread to see stuff. Especially with how bad a lot of them are. Horrible format

>>8752597

This is a terrible idea, no matter which way you try to pitch it. I've seen too many vendettas over the years where people would try to start shit for no reason. We do not need extra dry kindling to this fire shitstorm we have already.

>>8752659
the only reason someone would try to start a black-list service like this (for an ENTIRE group over many comms) is to start shit and watch it burn. It's an incredibly egotistical and manipulative idea. It reminds me of a more totalitarian version of lace.

>>8752506
Thanks. I know who Dom is but I don't know who she is on fb and didn't recognize her

>>8752659
>>8752643
And this is why it's so easy to scam lolitas

>>8752671

Yes, having one anonymous person whose motives we don't know start a vigilante list of lolitas we don't like for reasons will totally help with that situation.

>>8752679
I already feel sorry for the names that will be stuck on the list after it eventually gets abandoned. It's much harder to change behavior with something like that.
I admit that I might not have treated my old comm the best in my edgy teen days. I left because I was so embarrassed and finding a new comm that didn't know anything about me was nice and I could start over.

>>8752679
I don't think it's an unreasonable suggestion to say "hey I wish there was a place to keep track of all the people saying publicly that they file fraudulent chargebacks" and whatnot. Having one person you email may not be the best idea but the basic notion behind it isn't completely off

>>8752699

Well, first off, anon makes it very clear she's going to take any and all offenses, which are not limited at all to scammers.

If anon just compiled a list of people who are known scammers, gave proof such as screenshots of negative feedback on any sites they sold from, researched it well, and left it at that, i wouldn't have an issue. Instead, they're taking it upon themselves to record a 'ban/black list' based on any slight, imagined or real, based on anons submitting names and so-called proof to them. I can't imagine this ending well at all.

>>8752399
Please do! I'm a Lolita and I'll soon join the Canadian Navy.

>>8752348
Why do people bitch about stuff like this? When you get your dress, you'll look fine. Who cares if another girl has it. In fact, keep them in mind in case they ever want to sell it or something. Whiny brat.

>>8752741
It sounds like she's one of those girls that get pissed if there's a reprint because she's only in it for the status symbols.

>>8752643

Not really. People just said they wanted and nobody was doing it so I did it. I don't have much interest one way or another, I was just offering to be a channel to get shit done. If people want to mistrust me that's fair enough but there's no "motive".

>>8751256
Well we know who you are now anon.

>>8752848
It's pretty common knowledge that the mods of RC:U lurk here, they're made themselves known before

>>8748540
>she's also bumping old as fuck and likely inactive posts from 2013

>>8752508
I'd like to see a global blacklist of shitty sellers and their various monikers. There doesn't seem to be a comprehensive list in one place that collates scammers. They rip people off on one platform and then just move on to another using a different name.

>>8752643
Would you rather people say nothing and let shitty people bounce between communities? The amount of times I've seen people who were banned for very serious reasons either let into other comms or let back into the same comm years later because people don't know what happened, and go on to cause trouble again, is crazy and it's so easily avoided.

>>8752652
Seconding this, if people are going to post coords there should be a different sub. At that stage, we might as well just go back to LJ. This all seems unnecessarily complicated. Everything we need is already on LJ.

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Are people that smoke weed just an annoying vocal minority or are there really this many people that smoke that trash? If someone admits they smoke weed my opinion of them as a person immediately plummets and it's hard to take anything else they say seriously.

>>8753170
But why? That just seems very judgmental and, frankly, childish. I don't smoke pot, hate the smell, but otherwise why does it affect you opinion of someone else so drastically just for one thing like that?

>>8753179
Wait. Does that mean I can actively look for other lolitas who desperately sell their brand to afford heroin and people like you are going to defend me? Niiiice

>>8753182
Their money, their life. A lot of quicksales are because lolitas are too stupid to save up for emergencies or even their rent. NOT capitalizing on that would make the buyer just as stupid imo.

>>8753182
There's a difference from those who casually smoke weed and those who are heavily dependent on heroin to the point of selling everything they own. But please, continue demonising all drugs because of your obvious superiority

>>8753182
Obviously heroin and pot are two very different things, but frankly as long as people can keep their shit together and aren't hurting anyone else, I don't really care what they do with their time and money. Plenty of lolitas have emergency sales because they'really too stupid to have savings for important things. If you don't feel bad buying off them, why feel bad buying off someone who's just trying to get funds for another recreational interest? I wonder how being so self-righteous feels.

>>8753138
what kind of "serious reasons" are we talking here?

even things like sex offender registries fuck up people's lives despite seeming like a good idea to keep people safe. false accusations, paranoia, grudges, and stupid childhood mistakes are too common for a banlist to be created lightly.

>>8753179
Why? Because I think it shows lack of class, lack of self control, and poor choices/impulse control. The same way I look down on people who smoke cigarettes and over eat to the point of being fat as shit. Also the people that shill the whole "it's good for you!" argument: enjoy your fucking lung cancer. You're still inhaling foreign particles into your lungs. Also high people are annoying as fuck to deal with.

>>8753253
Ok, you paint all stoners as people who just smoke 24/7 which is not the case. I smoke (meaning dabbing, tinctures, and edibles) as needed for migraines and I maybe have 1-2 migraines a week. Most of the girls who replied to the original RC post, use for medical reasons like chronic pain, bipolar disorder, insomnia. Yeah, smoking still causes biproducts of combustion to be inhaled but there are a lot of other ways to use THC.

Get off your high horse, senpai, if you think about it Lolita can cause poor impulse control and poor self control too.

Plus, Legal weed is cheap so it's not like we're coughing up mad dough for a quick fix.

>>8753264
I hate how it changes F a m to senpai now

>>8753253
What about drinking alcohol? Not everyone who smokes is a stoner. I guess I'm a puss, but I genuinely don't see the point of looking down on other people for something so trivial. Your personality is more important, imo, and that judgmental, holier-than-thou attitude is far more unbecoming to me than getting high. Different strokes, I guess.

>>8753264
wish weed was approved as a treatment for migraines in my area. i hate smoking, but it's so much cheaper than other migraine treatments.

best case scenario is getting oil to make edibles with, and having a brownie when i get into prodrome phase. i imagine it would be very cozy, and wouldn't have the risks associated with the pills i am only allowed to take 3x a week anyway.

>>8753264

Different anon. I really hate all of this drug acceptance stuff too and have voiced that opinion.

I have proscribed/recommended Marijuana be tried in a few severe cases (mostly severe injuries or terminal illness), but the reality is there are medically effective treatments for all the things you mentioned. In fact THC is an antagonist for many of those conditions. Some cannabinoids may help, but you don't need to get high if you're really using it for medical reasons. Which, I'm willing to bet if these girls are airing chronic conditions for privilege points in the first place it's all self diagnosed.

For migraines? Imitrex, Sumatriptan, and other medications are far more effective. You also can get more migraines from THC usage. Again talk to a doctor before you take a drug on your own. It's probably not helping.

>>8753253
Most of the people who are vocal about it are embarassing as fuck anyways. I know plenty of people who smoke who are responsible and dont wave it in other peoples faces. There are plenty of embarsssing people who smoke weed, but they are a vocal minority. It's not fair to judge everyone equally about it. Btw i hate smoking. I dont like the smell, and i dont like getting high it's not a fun feeling for me. Doesn't mean im going to stop being friends with other people who do it, though ive known serious potheads and again, thats a different issue completely, and not all smokers are lazy potheads

>>8753292
>For migraines? Imitrex, Sumatriptan, and other medications are far more effective.
don't talk about shit you know nothing about. migraines are notoriously difficult to treat, especially if you have chronic migraine. there is no one treatment that works for everyone, just as there is no one thing that is a trigger for every migraineur.

if you think all one has to do is pop a pill you are woefully ignorant.

>>8753296
I'm actually, you know, something called a doctor. Someone who is paid and trained to keep up with these studies and advancements to try and keep people like you, who seem to think they know everything, alive. If you want to make your illness worse and trigger other things in the future that could potentially kill you, by all means, you're free to do so.

>>8746556
How funny. John is actually half black himself.

>>8753292

>imitrex. sumatriptan
those are the same drug "doctor" anon (sumatriptan is generic imitrex)

as for medical MJ making migraines worse. I am a chronic sufferer of migraines, some will last two or three days at a time. Sumatriptan and other drugs will actually take me out for an entire day, which is not good considering I have a full time job.

I moved recently to a legalized state and my friend told me to try MJ to cure my migraines. My recovery time is cut drastically (and my wait time for the pain to stop too) and I can actually go to work.

>THC causes migraines

You're talking out your ass because you would know that the painkiller is CBD, and doctors prescribe that you take high CBD to cure migraines.

>>8753326
yeah, and i'm Misako.

a regular doctor isn't equipped to deal with chronic migraine once the first line of treatments fail to work. unless you have proof of being a neurologist with a specialty in migraine treatment, your opinions are not going to be much better than those of a patient who has lived with the disease. the number of migraineurs who fail to receive adequate treatment from doctors is pretty high, and i bet it has something to do with the arrogance you are displaying.

>>8753345
other chronic migraine anon here. marijuana seems like caffeine when it comes to migraines: it helps some people and triggers others. that's just the beauty of migraine treatment.

>>8753345
I specifically listed them like that because they are the same.

If you had bothered to read the post I specifically mentioned other cannabinoids as the effective compounds. Hence my point that you don't need to be high. TCH is what gets you high. It's also what causes migraines. Guess what? If you're self medicating you're getting THC along with the other stuff. But then if you smoke your reading comprehension is probably in the gutter along with a few other higher neurological functions so it's really not worth my time arguing.

>>8753292
Trust me this was doctor recommended. I have an extremely sensitive GI tract. even over the counter pain meds like Ibuprofen causes me to throw up. I was taking depakote and topamax as a way to curve the migraines but they caused unfavorable neurological side effects like shakes, stuttering, loss of appetite, paranoia, etc.

MMJ treats the migraines without awful side effects. There's actually a website, leafly.com, where you can look up potential side effects (like headaches, dry mouth, drowsiness) of strains before purchasing so you make sure you're buying exactly what you need to treat your condition. I stay away from strains with too high levels of THC to treat my migraines. It's not that we just go to a dispensary and say "just fuck me up" there is a lot of planning that I do before I decide what I want to use to treat my migraines.

>>8753326
Just fyi, my neurologist gave up on me. I kept getting migraines and ran through all of the treatment options he had presented me. The migraine medications caused other aliments like IBS, seizures, extreme weight loss, and many more. They have treatments that work for some people but not everyone and the side effects that traditional medicine cause are sometimes not worth it.