Short of renting out orifices, what are some quick ways to scrape

Never rent out your own orifices. That's not >>>/biz/ thinking. Instead, find the demand for orifices to be filled and then fill the demand with other people taking a percentage of the net profit.

Maybe look into selling off semen, blood, etc? If they do that in whatever country you're in.

>>998038
All your money into ASTI

>>998077
I'm a black Manlet so the semen market is a no-go. Blood is taken here, but I've only seen it done voluntarily without monetary compensation.

I need to buy a car to live out of, as well as pay off some debt accrued by my parents under my name.

>>998083
WE WUZ KINGS

>>998089
Shut up you fucking homo

black and nigger are two different things.

>>998038
Whats this doughy goodness?

>>998089
God dammit I don't know why I wasn't expecting that but I got me anyway kek.
>>998093
No reason to be offended for me; it's funny. People need to get a sense of humor over stuff, man.

>>998096
A pb&j a made a while back. Just made steamed buns instead of using store bought bread. Flour is cheap, yo.

>>998093
&SHIET

Net went down from weather for a second.

Anything?

>>998096
It looks like someone took flat uncooked dough, rubbed PB and Jelly on it, then folded it over.

Just look up how to make rolls. Screw the PB and J too. Well made rolls taste way better rubbed with butter and with butter stuffed inside them.

Hows your credit score.

Get CC use CC to buy Visa Gift Cards from SimonMall. Cheapest right now. Unless you're a AAA member. In which case they're no fee.

>>998357
Credit score is 493. Parents stole identity and shat over my credit history.

Also $8,000 in the hole before I can return to university; parents told me not to take out a student loan and they'd pay for my semester only to both not pay for it and not tell me they never paid for it, lol.

>>998357
Are you Chinese?

That is a very Chinese idea.

Well, currently doing training for another spot at work (Am line, training fro cashier) to get as many hours as management can afford to give me. Shooting for 70 a week until August. Then I'll have about $8 grand saved up, enough to pay off my debt, but I'll be back at having absolutely nothing afterward.

Bumping for any advice to solve this. I've been out of school for nearly two years now trying to fix this mess and getting shit from relatives the entire time.

>>998083
its cuz its not plasma they donate for time. A nigga here could pay rent donating blood 400 a month.

>>998038
sports betting. i dont even watch sports, i mostly just rely on statistical prediction and i get close to 80% right. one good combi bet and you can very easily make a grand risking very little money.

>>998079
I actually lost $20 to this meme, and it still makes me laugh.

>>998089
Oh fuck, i was not ready for the hearty chuckle that this brought me. Good shit anon

>>998083
>Blood is taken here, but I've only seen it done voluntarily without monetary compensation.
Sell plasma, not blood.

Look into temp agencies that offer day work. You'll end up in a horrible factory or flag work road construction or some other shit, but you'll get paid at the end of the day.

Pick up odd jobs on craigslist. Move snow, leaves, or grass clippings. Offer to take shit to the dump.

>>998842
I have a full-time job, I'm looking for another full-time to get 80 hours a week (Current job won't allow me overtime).

I started this thread thinking I was only 1 grand in the hole. My parents failed to inform me I actually need $8000.

Applying to get another 40h job. Any /biz/ advice on a good laptop?

>>998597
>Credit score is 493. Parents stole identity and shat over my credit history.

thats some advanced niggotry right there

>>999430
are you fucking paying off debt your nigger parents took out in your name?
what you should be doing is fucking moving out

>>998083
Did you pay any of those debts yet? If not you could refute it and if you could prove it was taken without your consent you could get it cancelled.

>>999900
Cheap used thinkpad. EBay and refurbished are your friends

>>1001099
I can't move out, though. I literally can't afford it.

>>1002466
Still refuting it, even spoke to a lawyer. He said my best bet is to accept it and pay it off myself, as anybody willing to take the case will charge thousands. Still looking, though.

>>998731
is there a website that just spells out the good bets to take?

>>1002504

also can try dell's auction website.

>>998731
>i mostly just rely on statistical prediction and i get close to 80% right

Bullshit unless you're betting money lines.

>>1003441
>>1002504
Thanks.

I'm going to virtually live at Barnes and Noble given it is closer to work than my house.

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>>998038

1: become a rapper
2: ?
3: profit !

>>1003545
OP on mobile. At this point, why not?

>>1003437
well there are many websites that offer predictions, either based on statistics or made by experts, you can just google it. that said, they are not reliable enough to just follow their advice, because theres often lots of info they dont take into account. i dont rely on a single website, i personally pick games i want to bet on based on the offered odds and the quality of the games, then check out the predictions. the sites i use utilize different methods to predict the outcome and i obviously, i usually make sure most of them predict the same outcome (though for some leagues certain websites are utterly useless). when i have selected my picks i place a system bet that allows me to get one of the bets wrong and still make a profit and i place a combi bet for all games no higher than the return id receive from getting e.g. 4/5 of my system bet right. the combi bet is unnecessary but only needs to be right more than 5% of the time to be profitable so i just go with it.

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>>1003545
>>1003988
Plus this method will get you BITCHES

>>998038
Your parents are fucking assholes man, best of luck to you

>>1004766
Thanks, but I shouldn't have fallen into the trap of putting all my chips on graduating from Uni anyway.

I still have no idea what to do; currently reading up on Php to get into web design.

Bump before work.

>>1006409

>Buy and selling over and over on eBay
>Buying cheap domain names and selling them on
>Writing shitty novels and selling them
>Go to the park after a nice day and look for dropped coins (seriously, in Hyde Park (London) you could find like 20 pounds per sunny day)

>>1006420
This is the worst advice i have ever seen

I hope this is bait

Go to home Depot and offer your labor. Also Craigslist offer help moving for 45 an hour

offer to clean houses on your local facebook pages or Craigslist. You can get 300+ for a four bedroom house. Sometimes people will take pity on you and pay you more. Just say you're trying to do everything you can to make your bills before Christmas.

Other ideas include:
Washing cars
Yard work
Walking Dogs (I've made 15/hr this way)
Tutoring/Babysitting Kids (some experience may be required)
Moving
Advertising. Companies will pay you 10+ an hour to hold a sign on a street corner.

Do what you gotta do. Go to your local library to use the computers. Ask questions. Reach out. People will help most of the time.

>>1006640
Hahaha while I will look into the others there is no sane person in this city that would let a black guy clean their houses. I don't even want to; that's just asking to get on deep shit because some kid loses something and doesn't want to get in trouble with his parents.

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>>1006880

you ain't neva told a lie B

What type of bread is that OP? >>998038

Looks good lol

>>1006884
read the fucking thread
>>998103

>>1006886

Very cool, steamed buns, never heard of that for pb&j! Thanks

>>1006903
It works out fine.

I'm currently waiting for my university to send me a copy of the original loan paperwork so I can see if my signature was forged and file a police report if necessary.

>>1006420
This board never fails to make me giggle.

>>1008699
Do you have any ideas? At this point I'm considering gvt work.

>>1008725
There's already a ton of advice in the thread. It sounds like you want money fast without really doing any work. It's possible but it depends on your city, circumstances and skills.I made a good amount of easy money when i was at uni working for an estate agent taking pictures, it worked because i was in a good area, had good contacts and a solid portfolio already. You need to look around you and spot opportunities, nobody here can really do that for you because they're not in your shoes. Best of luck.

>>1008781
I'm trying to dig out of nearly 10 grand preferably ASAP; I can't move out because I'd start losing money working full time.

I lack the capital for sports betting
I can only net $25 every 8 weeks selling plasma
I don't own this car, so my work is limited to what my parents let me do with it (hauling stuff is a no, out-of-state work is a no)
I will look into temp agencies to see if I can get a second job.
I do not have a lawn mower or a vehicle to transport one, and the lawns are dead until April
We don't get snow, just ice.
>>1006420
And
>>1006640
Are the only ones I could do, though I will not get a tutoring/babysitting/house cleaning job.