About to be...

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Hey fellow anons, looking for some solid advice.

I'm about to turn 23.
I live at my dads. I owe $300 in credit card bills. My checking account has less then $50 in it. I have about $2 in cash.

I spent the last $3000 I have and had bought AdEx at around $2.50.

I had one full bitcoin at one moment but now its worth about a .2-.3 of a bitcoin...

Would hate to sell right now.
Also I find it hard as fuck everyday to wake up and want to wake up. Even stay up.

I've put a gun in my mouth so many fucking times that the only scratches on the gun are from my teeth biting down on it.

Only thing what is stopping me from killing myself is that my mom & dad would have to deal with it, which in turn is the only reason why I'm doing crypto to see if I could make some gains, get my dad cheap property, and pay my moms car off.

Those are literally my ONLY two goals in life.
Possessions don't make me happy. Drugs don't make me happy. And money doesn't make me happy.

Basically... I'm just another random dude on the internet looking for hope.
Looking for serious answers. Thanks