Next week, I intern at a private equity firm. Any tips?

>>1427745
quit roleplaying online , get out of your basement and get a real life?

>>1427745
Appear at work on time and equipped with kneepads to impress your boss.

People love a Go-getter

>>1427745
Take a shower
Hit the weights
Get a clue

>>1427746
I am no elite genius that went to harvard or oxbridge. I just got an extremely fortunate opportunity that I am very grateful for, and I hope to make the most of it as a learning experience.

>>1427747
>>1427753

Yeah ok thanks, good to get the expected bullshit memes out of the way.

>>1427746
I didn't get the job but i've interviewed at IB's.

Not everyone here is a retard, the non retards come here for fun.

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258KB, 600x439px

>>1427765

im glad your so exited about another day your gonna spend shitposting and role playing on the forums.

>>1427768
I'm really not role-playing though. We can't keep going back and forth on this, so I won't reply to you again m8.

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59KB, 600x450px

>>1427778
>>1427778
>I'm really not role-playing though. We can't keep going back and forth on this, so I won't reply to you again m8.

oh i guess that makes it true, thats certainly all the proof i need.

>>1427745
Mate, Don't come to /biz/ for this shit. Most people here are students (HS and uni), STEM fags, NEETS trying to get lucky and cryptoshills.

Website called Mergers and Inquisitions. I know it's all about IB and what not, but, I'm sure it has some stuff for PE, look on actual forum boards (not anonymous shit)

>>1427853
nice damage control.

>>1427745
>>1427765
>>1427766
Checkout Wall Street Oasis, look up details about your firm, look up details about the top guy there and your interviewees (if you have only one interviewee and one round, it might not be a serious firm - I'd ask about "compensation structure," not "how much do I get paid to ruin companies, fa-milia???? i jk, 2 early 2 sleepy).

I'd recommend looking up some Private Equity blogs. Personally I don't know of any off the top of my head, but if you look for something similar to "Mergers and Inquisitions" and "Wall Street Playboys," even "Life on the Buy Side" you'd have an amazing resource to learn the intricacies the other faggots that are applying probably won't know about (or at the very least you won't come off as the newb you are).

>>1427853
Also this is great advice. There's the gem to be found laying around on 4chan, but Reddit and actual forum boards with handles and concrete topics are god-tier for information (only, otherwise if you spend time "getting to know the community" you'll probably just be wasting your time and end up like a regular 4chan poster who uses the internet to dodge his responsibilities and forget about everything for a few hours).

>>1427873
Thanks friend :)

>>1427933
Sure thing, bud ;)

>>1427946
Want to have gay sex?

>>1428007
I'll be considerate and give you a reach around while I'm pounding you.

>>1428009
You have to wear a condom

>>1428013
You like hurting? It'll take me some time to come with a comdom, even anal.

>>1427745
Bring hot water in a thermos. Swirl some in your mouth before meeting your boss. This will give you good breath and make you mouth nice and warm for his dong.

Also kneepads.

>>1428014
I do like hurting.

I'll jack you off when it gets too rough for me.

I just can't risk getting diseases because my girlfriend will know

>>1428016
I, too, have a girlfriend who I don't wish to catch any sexually transmitted diseases, due to unprotected gay anal intercourse, from me.

I'll use a ribbed condom. You probably won't feel it, but it adds a bit of resistance.

>>1428022
Okay, what is your phone number or email so I can contact you?

Are you the legal age to have consenting sexual encounters?

>>1428042
>>1428022
Gentlemen, let me just say that I fully respect your conversation and don't mean to intrude, but I have had a bit of a hankering for gay sex all morning. Would it be agreeable that I join you two?

>>1428042
15 f sweden @ proton mail . c o m
8 5 5 8 3 5 5 3 2 4

(Remove the spaces)

I am of legal age for intercourse and I am of able mind to consent.

>>1428046
We may start a train, but you must either be in the middle or at the front. I'm saving my anal virginity for a more serious relationship.

>>1428046
Wear a condom and be less than 8inches and we are good to go.

Email and/or phone please

>>1428052
>15
>f

lol
I thought this was gay sex
Also 15 is to young, sorry.

>>1428060
It's just a front. I catfish old Swedish men and rape them.