Sell me this pen

Why do you want a pen?

>>1105912
buy this pen and ill suck your cock and drain your balls

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>>1105915
Well.... hmmmm.... you're right, I guess I don't really need it.

>>1105923
What's this? This is extremely inappropriate, sir, I'm going to have to leave now...

Write tramp on my lower back

This pen is shit. Buy it or I will 1BeMHN9KM58EYh5r you.

>>1105928
come on dude, I'll jerk you off

Looking at a pen like this? you're obviously trying to make an impression. I suspect you have a lot of important documents to sign...

What you need to know is this pen will give your signature an elegant look and make a lasting impression. Bonus points, the ink well is sealed and won't leak in your pocket, or brief case, hence why the fountain tip is on the opposite end than you'd normally see. Use gravity to your favor.

Price isn't important, because at the end of the day, the impression you make is worth more.

>>1105912
See this pen, you can't have it, fuck off

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>>1105912
If you preorder this pen now for 89,99 U.S. dollars I'm going to give you a free code to download the latest U2 album

>>1105935
y-you too

>>1105912
Think down my name

>>1105936
Winrar.

>>1105912
Godzilla once used this pen.
If Godzilla came up to you and asked you buy this pen you know you would.

>>1105912
You're not buying a pen, really. You're disarming an adversary. If you don't buy this pen, it's the very same one I'm going to stab you in the fucking throat with.

>>1105937
fucking give it to me u drugger

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I'll give you this bigger pen, if you buy that pen.

no I'm keeping this pen for myself fuck u

>Slightly unscrew the pen before handing it to him
>it falls apart in his hands
>You break it you buy it

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>>1105912
Sir, please write down your name on this empty note.

This pen is unsealable. He accompanied me for 25 years. Solid platinum.

You can effortlessly sell this pen for 100$ + on whatever platform you choose.

Me? For 5$ you can have it.

Thats a big pen

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>>1105912
The point is mainly to sell the pen by describing what it can do for someone. That's the main core of marketing. You're not meant to rattle off all the benefits of the technical production of the pen, but rather what it can do from an emotional state.

You're meant to figure out why the person you're selling the pen to, need it. What they need it for. If they truly don't need a pen, it's not your job to force it on them. It's your job to persuade them to see why they need it.

>>1106046
Fucking kikes. Last time I shop in this shithole. Fuck bagels, too.

>>1106055
>Wow, you stole the words right out of my mouth, Boss.
Pic related.

>>1106191
For you.

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The pen's stock is on a dip, catch it while you can

>>1106191
The penis mightier than the sword, Trebek.

>>1105912
This is pen 2.0 remember when pen 1.0 was only $1 and now it's $400?
This is going to be big like pen!
And you can get it for only $5!

It's in a dip right now and it's ready to take off and go to the moon. This pen is going to the moon!

Don't miss out!

>>1105912
how about you go fuck yourself

>>1105912
>Listen buddy, you're walking away with this pen in the next 45 seconds, it's either going in your hand or your urethra. Which is it going to be?

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>>1106199
You've been seeing wolfie interviews.

>This pen is a collector item. The company was just bought by Montblanc and they will grow in value by the month. It's not a pen, it's an investment.

>>1105912
This pen comes with free ETH

>buying a pen

Huge waste of money when I can just suck a few dicks and get you some pens boss. Already saving you money.

>>1105912
This pen will spend the next 30 seconds in my girlfriend's vagina. After I take it out, you can have it for $300.

>>1106701
Sir, please stop shoving my pen up your dogs anus.

This pen has been inside of Chloe Moretz .

>>1106707
and so has black cock. Are you telling me your pen is worthless?

>>1105912
I'll shove this pen down your throat, then I'll call 911

>>1105957
Nice

>>1106205
TO THE MOOOOOOOOON

>>1105912
I am sorry sir, THIS pen is not for sale

>>1105912

thanks for the free pen, fuccboi

>>1105936
Damn man good job

>>1105912

Buy this pen so everyone at work won't think you're a faggot and your wife can finally feel that she has a real man at home.

>>1105912
this isn't a pen, it's pencoin, the latest cryptocurrency. Right now it's worth $0.01, but if you buy a million of these pens and just wait, they'll take off like bitcoin and you'll be a millionaire. You missed out on bitcoin, you missed out on ethereum, don't miss out on pencoin.

>>1105912
Le buy my pen pl0x XDDDDDDDDD

>Assuming you are over 60

Hey have you seen these new pens? No? They never run out of ink. Don't you watch the news? They are sold out everwhere! I ordered one but got two, so I can sell you this for half price. 20 bucks.