dealing with child support

Did you give her your real name?
Don't give your real name to a sexual partner you don't intend to keep around, teebee8ch.
If not, just bail.
If so, gg no re, you can either bail or have a negative net worth for nearly 20 years.

>>1017339
>did you give her your real name
yes

I told her to get an abortion or get a paternity test to prove its mine... haven't talked to her since.

>just bail
like how? I can't leave the country if that's what you mean.

>>1017336
>and the kid would be better off without having me in its life.

Science disagrees with you there. You are telling yourself a lie, but you are messing up the kids life by being irresponsible. The kid is much better of on all socioeconomic factors by having contact with it's biological father.

>>1017357
Then have a negative net worth for the next couple decades anon.

Should have used a condom.

>>1017364
I don't have the means to take care of it, Im not going to spend the rest of my life being stared at by some fuck ugly kid who resents me. It wasn't my choice to keep it, the mom chose that... so now its her problem. don't talk to me about moral obligation. im here for financial advice.

>>1017375
there's plenty of government assistance programs and with child support the kid will be just fine without me. I'd rather not be around someone who is going to be fed lies about me from birth and go through all the legal bullshit to try to see a kid I didn't want a couple weekends out of the year.

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>>1017336


Should've stuck with BP brobro

>>1017336
are you sure it's yours?

>>1017381
government assistance is bottom of the barrel. which is the fate you have given your kid. just don't lie and say that she is better off without you, because that is false. YOU will probably be economically worse off if you take responsability for your child just like any other father who takes responsability is. But no child is better of in any socioeconimic factor without the father. The kid is way worse off because you don't want to take responsability.

As you say yourself the kid will need government assistance and will live at the bottom of society because of you. Don't go around lying, we know economics and have seen the data on children who are raised by single mothers. You are not doing the child a favor by not providing any real support.

>>1017336
Hey shitbird, it's your kid. What kind of asshole fuckstick like you asks us for free advice when you don't want to help raise the fruit of your loins with some finances. This is how children become fuckheads: parents are fuckheads to begin with. ISI, ISIL and Daesh don't want western kids to thrive so I guess you're a fucking terrorist too. Dickhead.

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>>1017336
As a child of a nasty divorce and not seeing ma dad for the past 7 years (21), I can tell you its a pretty fucked up life bro.

But you know who you slept with and if you slept with a nasty ho looking for a financial tampon...without a condom
You fucked up beyond belief. No amount of MGTOW can unfuck the situation you're in right now. And unless you look into some state law that allows you to evade child support(idk don't quote me I am not a lawyer) You are completely fucked for the next several decades
>Freindly reminder that under Obama care kids fall underneath you until they are 24
>And this can be dragged out to 27

And as far as I know even if you don't have the money and are flat broke on the street, the law will bring your ass to jail. What will suck even worse is if you can't even stand the mother shes going to be a heartless bitch and hold that kid as bait for meal ticket for A LONG TIME.

Not even gonna drop the shoulda coulda woulda (shoulda worn a condom dingus)
But seriously start looking into legal consultation [not over the internet] or get ready to move to another country
Because your ass is fucking grass dude

>tfw my school is right outside the supreme court of my city/family court
>See fathers all the time
>crying
>screaming
>pacing the sidewalk
>Wondering how they are going to pay their baby mama's when they just got their hours cut at work but still need to pay up

>"How am I going to SURVIVE!?!!"
>"Well I am sorry but I gotta feed the kid"(New hand bag, nails done, the latest Iphone, and hoop earrings)
^^Those are real quotes btw

>>1017440
This

>>1017336
If she keeps the kid you are going to pay 19% of your income (before taxes and other deductions) for the next 18 years, plus half of all medical and school costs. The most infuriating thing will be that the baby's momma just gets a check every month and will spend it on whatever she likes, and probably be supported by another sucker plus various government aid including free housing because she has a kid.

Here's what you do anon. You raise as much cash as possible (thousands of dollars) and try to buy her out of having the kid. It's your only hope.

>>1017357
You did the smart thing by telling her you want to get a paternity test. Never ever say that you'll help out with the kid because that can lock you into child support even if it turns out to not be yours. Don't even go with her to birthing or child care classes. And if you show up for the birth don't say you're the father and don't sign anything until the paternity test is done, especially the birth certificate. She and the state will use any tiny piece of evidence that you cared about the kid for a millisecond to keep you on a lease for 18 years, even if it comes out a different color than you.

However if the paternity test says you are the father then don't be a shithead and step up to your biological duty.

>>1017484
Oh and I'll answer your questions.

>is there some way to negotiate a better price to pay or any kind of financial loop holes around this?

It will always be ~19% unless you have your kid like 50% of the time. The only way around this would be if you were CEO of your own business and gave yourself a small salary, then bought everything you need with a company card. However, you have to list all assets you have so make sure you don't actually own the company on paper.

>I also have credit card, student loan debt... is there any leverage with this type of debt when it comes to being forced to pay child support?

They don't give a FUCK about your problems anon. I have $11k in dept and still pay 19%. They wouldn't care if you had to live in a van by the river and sell your kidneys to pay that child support.

>>1017336

I think you should DEFINITELY have a role in this kids life.

That being said, send her a formal email offering a monthly payment to her to help take care of the child. State why this amount is fair, and within reason for you. If she accepts, cool.

If not, you gotta go to court I think.

>>1017336
I would wait till you go to court before sending any payments.

I have a friend that was just absolutely fucked by the court because he had been sending his girl money every month for a years time. When the girl finally took him to court she lied about receiving any payments and he was responsible for back child support.

Make sure you have documentation, if you wait and go through the courts their can be no discrepancies.

>>1017463
>Freindly reminder that under Obama care kids fall underneath you until they are 24
>And this can be dragged out to 27

this is not true if this is even remotely true western civilisation is utterly and completely fucked, no one will want to have a piece of shit that they have to pay for literally the rest of their lives.

the way I see it even 18 well beyond some one should be obligated to pay for a fucking kid even if it's yours

fuck that

>>1017438
>>1017440
Get the fuck out of here with your feminist bullshit. That woman knows damn well she'd be bringing this kid into a shit life, and still wants to have it. This is on her.

The law needs to change to allow men a "legal" separation from the child, just like how women can choose to abort or choose to put it up for adoption. That would be real equality.

>>1018381
You don't pay all of child support, but you do pay their health insurance costs until they're 26. And yes, that DOES mean that you're paying child support plus health insurance for the original 18 years as well.

There is no reason for a responsible man to have children unless his genetics are god's gift to the earth.

>>1018396
Nah man he's right kid with a single mom and no escape and no one to reign in the crazy is a fucking nightmare.

You knew the risks of unprotected sex.

>>1017336
>>1017336
>>1017336
OP, please listen. I'm sure you're aware this is nothing to be taken lightly. One of my friends has to pay child support for a few kids with an ex-wife, and he makes $600 a week, he has to pay over $500 PER WEEK to those fucking kids, he only takes home $75 a week, and that's still not enough money, he's behind in payments. The fucking SWAT team came to his house and arrested him for not making his payments, which makes no sense. Why would you arrest someone who is working and paying support, essentially making it so they could lose their job?? Anyways, not a lot of people know how much the men get fucked in these circumstances, if she is down with it, try to write up a contract with her saying you'll pay like $100 per week, get it signed and notarized, and make it seem like she's getting the better end of the deal. Then pay attention to your kid. When your kid is born just spend time with it, kids need their fathers, and it will be brownie points with the mom, so she might not think twice about taking you to court. Hope this helped

>>1018410
wow smartest thing ive ever heard.

>>1018416
>a woman has unprotected sex
Two options:
>"well I don't want the kid"
>abortion/adoption. Nobody bats an eye
or
>"I do want the kid"
>have the kid, force the father to pay child support even if he's financially unable to

>a man has unprotected sex
One option:
>the woman gets to choose
>maybe he doesn't have a kid
>maybe she forces him into state-sponsored extortion for the next 18 years

That's a bunch of horseshit. The law needs to change.

>>1018430
>>maybe she forces him into state-sponsored extortion for the next 18 years

This is the butthurt that comes from sticking your dick into "crazy" and not wearing a condom.

Your tears are tasty.

>>1018435
>WAHHHH WOMEN NEED EQUALITY!!!!!!!!

>WAHHHH I DONT WANT TO BE EQUAL LIKE THAT SHITLORD!!!!

>>1017339
>Don't give your real name to a sexual partner you don't intend to keep around

I do this all the time using based Johnson as a last name. But does it really provide any sort of protection? All these girls have my cell phone number and some know my address.. Isn't that all you need to get a real name once courts and shit get involved?

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>>1017417

He fell for roastie overlords

>>1018423
fuck that shit and I'll tell you why....

I am a spic who has no kids and I am 32 my sister has 2 and I help her every once in a while with hers cus she is dumb as a fucking Rock not even kidding.

every time I go to the doctor to help her all I see is ugly fucking spics having a bunch of ugly little spiclets popping everywhere.

every once in a while I see an ugly fat most likely lonely white bitch trying to fill that void of rejection that she probably has.

from all my times accompanying my sister i have seen one maybe 2 attractive white couples who have been there.

I don't mean to sound /pol/ack but the current system is fucking whites right in the ass.
I am a northern Mexican, not too ugly not too dumb compared with my southern country man.
I feel serious fear watching the current trend of manlet darky ugly dumb sons of bitches, popping kids every other month while the attractive "smart and responsible" people is frighten and or over thinking having a child cus it means their lives will be literally over specially for the male.

I am all about father's being responsible for their actions but the little fucking bitches should have some skin in the raising child game too, not just sitting and waiting for all the goodies to fall from the sky.

i am sure that if you force bitches to invest "monetarily" on the kids future there will be a lot of changes in society but who can ever be elected under that platform

>>1018435
that's not how it is and you know it.

woman are encouraged and rewarded for bad behavior under the current system.
why would a woman stick around with a man when she can drain his resources and drain another's man resources at the same time?

shit why would she stop at 2 man when she can have 3 or 10 the worst she behaves the more she is rewarded under the current system you know why?

because it was woman themselves who it that way.

false accusation of rape who cares you might win benefits doesn't matter if you fuck some one else's lives there is no repercussions

>>1017339
You still have to pay back child support if the kid is over 18

>>1018416

>You knew the risks of unprotected sex.

Not OP, but in my case my baby's momma said she was on the pill but actually she had stopped taking it. She had plenty of time to get an abortion as she magically knew she was pregnant only 3 weeks after conception, but instead she basically stole my sperm from me and my future as well. Now I work full time but still live at my parent's house while she has a free Section 8 house plus various other government aid.

>>1018430

> women control sex
> thus women control life in large part

A key step in understanding life.

So be a man and take control of everything else.

>>1018653
Doesn't matter how much else you control. When it comes to kids and divorce, the mother wins, every time. Financially, socially, everything. The legal system is so broken right now.

can't wait for male birth control to become available. fortunately it won't be a long wait now.

>>1018777
Any particular company you're betting on?

>>1018777

Pretty sure they could do it with some type of androgen regimen. Which would be awesome because it would make you more manly and stronger and shit.

Since we are talking about women how fucked up is that females get to take the female hormone for birth control and it gets passed around like candy but testosterone, the male hormone, is highly guarded and considered a high class drug.

>>1018421

Best answer of the thread

>>1018768

So fuckin pull out or use a condom nigga.

No one is putting a gun to your head, and forcing your sperm into these hoes vaginas.

If you're really that scared you can just bang hookers instead of a wife/gf. I mean that's what they are there for.

>>1018777

Me too.

That silicone plug is gonna be a fucking game changer, like death blow to feminism type shit.

I have 6 good friends, like my crew if you will. 3 of them got suprised with a kid when their girl was "on the pill". Now they have no fucking life at all. It's work and baby. That's all they get.

>>1018627
believing Women never lie

>>1018856
thanks for the tip. Tracking now. Cheating whores gonna get it.

>>1018852
I'd rather not have sex at all than have sex with a condom. It's literally just not worth the time.

And I do pull out whenever I do have sex, but I'm terrified of being one of those "6 out of 100" who ends up with a kid even though they pulled out correctly, every single time.

>>1017440
This

OP is a dumb faggot.
OP get the test done and if the kid is yours then man the fuck up and pay up.

If you give her any money without documentation and she later decides to take you to court, the judge will just say "lol pics or it didn't happen." If it's yours then go to court and get it all documented

>>1018999
>I'd rather not have sex at all than have sex with a condom. It's literally just not worth the time.
Only ever had sex once without a condom. It 3-4x better feeling but the anxiety for the next 6 months was the worst thing in the fucking world. It's been over 10 months now so I'm safe but never let someone gain weight after they sleep with you, follow those bitches around and make them jump rope or some shit. Bitch scared me half to death.

>>1018999
As long as you remember to pee before sex, pulling out is 100% effective.

And also dont wait till moment of orgasm to withdraw.

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Vasectomy master race. Enjoy your fucked shit. Condoms break all the time.

Rule 1: Don't have sex without condoms to a woman you are not married to

>>1018381

It is 100% true. Especially in northern states. If your kid decides to go to graduate school you will be on the hook until 27.

>>1018777

It does exist. Bank your sperm and get a vasectomy. The white race is a lost cause and I could care less about greater humanity.

>>1018856

>silicon plug

So you shoot jizz without having anywhere for it to exit? Sounds painful.

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When ever I start to feel down, I just thank my lucky stars I'm single, have a decent job, and most of all no kids. My GF just broke up with me last night and I've kinda been upset about it but in the grand scheme of things, I'm the real winner here in the sense that none of my man gravy leaked into her pussy and as a result, sending me into a downward spiral of economic misfortune and ultimately suicide.

Life is pretty sweet.

>>1020077
broke with you 31st of dec? dayum what a good day to breakup with your partner.

wonder what was the reason? (hopefully not a bed reason, you know)
but either way thats right, you're better off not paying for pussy.

alpha fucks
beta bucks.

dont forget it, keep it up, im glad you woke up neo.

so what about cucking? If my wife sleeps around does it make our marriage void? Or does it depend on my consent?

>>1020800
you are a cuck wether you consent it or not.

cuckolding is when a woman have sex with someone else('s) and not her husband.

however in the holy bible; a consenting partner for the counterpart to have sex outside of their marriage is not a sin, as long as both are conscious about it and consented it's then not considered betrayal. but in society you will still be a cucked beta fag.

>>1020807
Whatever happened to those wholesome family values?

>>1017381

>go through all the legal bullshit
>to see a kid I didn't want
> a couple weekends out of the year

That's straight up selfish. Honest. But selfish.

>>1017494

> They don't give a FUCK about your problems anon.
> They wouldn't care if you had to live in a van by the river and sell your kidneys to pay that child support.

You learn the harsh way that no one actually cares.

>>1017336

All of a sudden being in the Pepe camp doesn't feel so bad

Man, all my money to myself, nobody arrestin me for being broke, don't have to raise kids or answer the phone to some crazy grill.

Maybe my life is more comfy that I realise.

>smugpepe.exe

>>1017364
This. Fuck OP. I grew up raised by a single parent. It's tough.

>>1018999
>"pull out correctly"

Jesus christ. I wrap it up and at least ask if she's on birth control beforehand. There's several brands that almost feel like you're wearing nothing. Thinking of keeping a morning after pill in my overnight bag in case of a break.

Use your own condoms, not the ones she's kept rattling around in her purse for a year.

>can't fucking wait for the male birth control shot
>If I had 10 million dollars, I'd start a foundation for low income men to get it free and scream it from the rooftops
>If I ever need to reproduce, I'll do it with a surrogate and keep some chick around to help raise it

>>1019696
It just blocks sperm from being added to the semen. The sperm is just continually reabsorbed into your body, just as it would if you didn't fap six times a day.

So you still blow loads too.

>one shot
>lasts ten years
>reversible with another shot

Having a child with the wrong bitch is worse than HIV these days IMHO.

>>1019681

100% correct, but not easy to do

>>1019670
> not having an heir

>>1020941
> Having a child with the wrong bitch is worse than HIV these days IMHO.

agreed

>>1020941
>>1021037
>Having a child with the wrong bitch is worse than HIV these days IMHO.
Oh it definitely is, no doubt. HIV is easily treatable, it's literally one daily pill and you never have to worry about it ever again. I think the pill might cost a few hundred dollars a year. No major side effects.

Having a kid though? Especially if the mother is a vindictive bitch? Good god, you'd be hard pressed to make a worse mistake than that.

>>1020939
>If I had 10 million dollars, I'd start a foundation for low income men to get it free and scream it from the rooftops
Honestly this has been part of my philanthropy plan when I start making it big. Lots of men's rights stuff, men's support (because there fucking isn't any at all), but especially making male birth control cheap or free, easy to acquire, and well known.

I will do for men what planned parenthood did for women.

Note to all the dicks reading this thread: If she says she's on the pill, she's not. It is the man's responsibility to protect himself from STDs and an unwanted pregnancy.

You can come on 4chan /biz/ and cry like little bitches because you have to deal with the consequences of letting your little head think for your big one. Fucking crybabies....fucking irresponsible shit heads. Man up! Do the right thing.

>>1018421
OP I was gonna just jump down your throat and call you a pussy but after reading this guys post I'm gonna agree with him instead.

you are fucked for life

i suggest you leave the country or something

>>1020800
>If my wife sleeps around does it make our marriage void?
Absolutely not. You'd have to have a specific infidelity clause in a prenupt, otherwise it means nothing at all.

>>1017336
it would be wise to work it out between yourselves for an amount you can but be sure to pay with a check or something that can be proven later...if the court calculate it they will do so using your current income, if that income changes it can be difficult to get the payments re-evaluated and you fall behind on it and find yourself in jail, they can also garnish your wages, keep your income tax return ect... also you made a child you should pay your child support

>>1018455
Fuck sluts in your car, their car, an alley, their place, or at a hotel. Get a prepaid cell phone and buy it cash. Tell sluts a fake name.

this happens to me i murder the judge, the mother, and then myself.

absolutely insane laws.

fucking female privilege is already so fucking high it broke through the ceiling of the building from the floor of which men look up wondering 'the fuck do feminists still complain about'

I'm seriously thinking that eventually there will be notarised abortion contracts between couples. IE a legal, mutual agreement to go through with an abortion should contraception fail.

>>1021357
china canceled all the gynocentric laws
they don't even give a shit if you beat your wife

Ok so much wrong here.

First of all, never negotiate a price to just pay her because she can go to court anyways and have the court make you pay again.

Second, don't do anything until she proves you are the father. Having her doing a paternity test and sending you a message "you're the father" is not what I mean. Make sure you get to see the result yourself and do a check with the testing agency itself.

Should it be your kid, and should you pay child support, make sure you'll never ever increase your income until the kid is 18. With all the debt it might be harder to make you pay a lot so that's probably good. Consider talking to a lawyer about this AFTER you are sure you are the dad.

Tell her that unless she gives you the result of a paternity test this is a non-issue an you won't respond.

Also how did this happen? Sex with the ex and no condom lol? how dumb are you. Are you even sure she is preggo?

>>1021357
it won't be allowed and it shouldn't be allowed, because that would mean the state (eg you, good boy who always uses a condom and doesn't bareback crazy exes) ends up paying for it.

>>1021237
OP if you consider this: people currently paying child support cannot leave the country unless they pay all 18 years in advance. Yes, you're gonna be literally trapped in this country.

>>1021384
depends on how advanced his trails are.
if he hasn't shown up in court yet there isn't a warrant yet

>>1021388
exactly which is why he should be preparing to leave if that's what he wants to do. But maybe it won't be necessary if the kid is not his, or if she's not even pregnant.

Also I don't know how having lots of debt affects leaving the country.

>>1021384
does this means, he can to court, tell the court he only makes 1k per month, so he pays 200 on child support per month.

then go to the bank, ask for 50k loan, pay her the 18 in advance and become free?

>>1021415
Nah mate, there are minimums. See >>1018421

You can be arrested for not paying enough even if you pay everything you have.

>>1021415
>tell the court
first of all he has to prove

second of all good luck getting a 50k loan if you make 1k and pay CS, on top of already having as OP says CC and student loan debt. I'm not even sure how easy it is to leave the country with massive debt. It certainly does impair your chances of getting a visa let alone residency in other countries.

>>1018421
>write up a contract with her saying you'll pay like $100 per week, get it signed and notarized
I doubt that will hold up in court.

Also lmao if I found myself in that situation I'd max out several credit cards by cash withdrawal, then go live in the boonies somewhere. If you have a kid in the USA you are absolutely keked

>>1021422
damn america, so the court can say what you earn is not enough, go get another job

>>1021444
almost like that. The reality is: "what you earn is not enough, go to jail" which makes no sense from an economical perspective whatsoever but well if there's one thing america loves it's sending people to prison.

>>1021422
>getting a visa let alone residency
Nigger you can't do either of those in this scenario anyways. Not paying child support is enough to get arrested over, which means cancellation of your visa and deportation back to the USA if you ever show up in any major nation's system.

We're not telling anon to leave his country for a cushiony life in Australia, we're saying he has to flee via bribing a ship captain and live in southeast asia for the rest of his life.

>>1021466
>Not paying child support is enough to get arrested over
is it also enough to get arrested over if it's not a crime in the country you are residing in? Eg a Saudi woman in the US who is wanted by Saudi Arabia to hang because she cheated can stay in the US because cheating isn't a crime in the US.

I'm really not sure how that works

>>1021486
The child support is continuously due in the US, so it's different from a single instance of a questionable law. Think of it like owing taxes and skipping town; the amount you owe keeps going up and the government will fuck you for it eventually.

>>1018856
I´m looking for Vasalgel. Still a couple years to go, but it´s looking great so far.

>>1017484
This is probably the best answer in this thread, assuming she can prove it's yours.

Just take out a loan, cash advance or whatever and pay her off $20,000. It will be worth it in the long run and she'll probably be dumb enough to accept it because these bitches don't think long term. It will be much cheaper than paying child support.

>>1021068
Same boat here.

First priority is taking my parents off working for the rest of their life, because they fucking deserve it.

Second priority is taking myself off working.

Third priority is getting enough to do exactly that. Society isn´t gonna go forward until we fix this fucking problem.

>>1021078

> Man up! Do the right thing.

Double standards are doubled.

Are we really going into 2016 like this? Didn't 2015 teach us anything?

Anyone have any solution to maximizing income without child support having a grab at it? What would be the most simplistic way of accomplishing this without being a wagecuck? I'm not asking under the table, but more legitimate, perhaps an LLC, trust, or similar?

>>1018381
Its true as many have replied to you about
I had to go to a specialist for an ingrown toenail last year and I am still dealing with bills from it last year.
And Obamacare (Which is fucking terrible by the way) barely covers anything or my dad has to dispute it with the insurance company constantly. I mean I had to payout personally to the guy 436$. What 19 year old do you know just has 400$ lying around.

>>1019685
My mom basically told me I would be put out on the street or have to start paying rent if I didn't go to school (Yet she doesn't have to pay the school bills that I rack up)

Seriously having kids today is Just not worth it. Come to think of it. In OP's situation it would be cheaper to hire a hit man than it would to pay out child support

Just go fucking see your kid and play a part in his life you degenerate bastard.

Kid didn't do anything and you are going to make his life more difficult for no reason. You need to groom him from his youth on everything from (handling women to managing finances), his stupid mom isn't gonna do it.

How is he supposed to feel knowing his dad gave no fucks about him? What if you have kids and a family later and he has to watch you giving a shit about your new kid and family but not him? What the fuck did he do to deserve that?

You should see him regularly let alone support and stop acting stupid.

>>1017336
As others have said, you're pretty much fucked. If she keeps the kid (which you have no deciding factor in) and the kid is actually yours (make sure you demand a DNA test), you have no defense not to pay child support.

Literally any court would rule against you and make you pay for the next 18+ years.

I guess you could try to agree on a smaller settlement outside of court, but I don't see why the woman would agree to a smaller amount than the one she'd get by awarded by a judge. You could try I guess, but don't expect much (she has all the leverage).

Good luck, you dun goofed.

to all stupid dumb fucks here.
if she's preggo go hire someone to beat the shit out of her
if she's got kids hire someone to murder her.

take my ip idgaf lol

>>>one guy from my board won the lottery (1m cash) and hired one guy from this same board to kill his wife so then there wouldn't be a divorce and need to split that 1m with her. (he wanted to divorce her before he won the lottery, she was a bad ass masculine woman very unattractive who wanted to dominate a man and it was all crazy shit from her)

so it is like god does exist, gave him the right opportunity to enjoy life for once and make someone save his life with that extra money he won in the lottery, he didn't really need, he just needed to separate a crazy bitch without getting economically hurt.

No, he was smart enough to not get her pregnant after realizing some years of marriage that he had made a mistake with her.
So no kids being hurt here.

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>>1021799

interesting

>>1021799
If you have a serious relationship with a gf and live together etc, it is to see if she is kind of going to be a good wife after married "as a sort of test".

once married, it is to see to if she will be the right woman for your children.

so in each stage take some years (minimum 3/5+) before going to the next one.
never rush regardless of how good things go, simply because you need time to know her 100%. go slow speed and 100% sure you will have enough reaction time to not crash.

>>1017487
This is important information.

>>1017336
>Is it smarter to let the court handle it or just try to negotiate a price I can pay monthly to help take care of the kid.

DON'T negotiate a price without it being legally binding. Men have contributed out of court, non-legal money to women who then take the man to court and get child support plus back dating the child support. This bankrupts guys who do this and they can't get the money they non-legally negotiated with the women.

This is one case where you must go to a family lawyer and see what your options are.

>>1021078
Kill yourself you fucking retard.

>>1021321
Nope. No fault divorce is in place everywhere in the United States. That means you can't cite infidelity as a reason for the not giving your wife half your stuff, or paying alimony, or child support. Even if you have proof.

>>1021625
>Society isn´t gonna go forward until we fix this fucking problem.
And the pathetic thing is nobody gives a shit about men, so the only way to fix it is if you have a ton of money.

>>1021694
Fuck yourself. It's not OP's fault that that kid is being brought into a shitty situation. It's 100% the woman's fault for taking the pregnancy to term in spite of the fact that SHE KNOWS THE FATHER DOESN'T WANT TO BE A FATHER. Any woman who does this is a selfish, vindictive bitch.

>>1021862
>It's not OPs fault the kid is being brought into a shitty situation

Bullshit. He knocked her up he should take some responsibility. Even if the woman is an evil bitch why punish the kid? You're basically guaranteeing they will have a shitty life by not being there. If you want to be treated like a man and get respect then act like a man and not a little pussy who runs away when life gets tough. Faggot. MGTOW are the biggest pussies on the planet.

>>1021988
Couldn't be said better.
I have 2 parents. but its like they they never existed. makes it even worse, (all they did couldve been done times better by my parent's friends, who seemed to love me more than my own parents when i was a kid/young guy)
wish i was put into adoption and raised by other parents. but oh well now i am almost 26 in 2 months, so its ok, and i kind of also accept it and embrace it, makes me feel hundred times stronger than any of my friends and i really think i am. stronger mentally i mean, i dont even lift.

>>1021988
Does the man not have a right to conception, considering he's half the DNA? If a woman deceived a man and she gets pregnant, is this not fraud/misrepresentation or essentially future child abuse? How can a child be brought up in an environment where their parents do not agree about the existence of said child?

>>1021988
>Even if the woman is an evil bitch why punish the kid?

You punish the kid by going through with it, bringing the child into the world where both parents aren't on the same page.

>You're basically guaranteeing they will have a shitty life by not being there.

Yes, and it's shitty also when the father completely resents the mother. Best case is to terminate.

You do realize that there is no such thing as 100% safe sex. Couples have sex, and must do so to have a healthy relationship. There are unwanted pregnancies. The consequence is that you must deal with it in the most responsible way. If both parties are prepared to undertake the pregnancy, you do it. If not, terminate. Because of our biological make-up as humans, the female has the ultimate say...which is to say, a two person decision can be manipulated to be only her decision.

>when life gets tough.

The difference is that something can be done prior to a life-long mess. It's incomparable to another event where you can't change the course of the trauma and must just "deal with it."

>>1021988
Why did you even bother posting that diarrhea?

>>1022008

Im not that guy you responded to.

Your points about abortion are right, but its not OPs call. Yes, it sucks, yes, the laws should change.

BUT - OP got the bitch preggers knowing the law and the kid did nothing wrong.
If she decides to keep it (yes, cry about it, wont change it), the kid deserves to have a dad.

Shouldve worn a rubber or get a vasectomy.

>>1022044

>yes, the laws should change.

I can't imagine a law somehow requiring a female to get an abortion under any circumstance whatsoever.

>the kid did nothing wrong

The *kid* doesn't even exist.

>Shouldve worn a rubber or get a vasectomy.

Two things that may have changed the predicament. However, that is not how you solve problems. You don't say, "Well, this wouldn't have been a problem if..." That is a distraction.

>the kid deserves to have a dad.

Funny enough, every human child does in fact have a dad. I don't think anyone is worried about the child having a dad. But, by 'dad', are you thinking of a man who functions with the child's mother in a healthy way? That's not going to happen in this situation...and not because someone is whining about not wanting responsibility...but because the man can't give it. This is not something that you can magically do, like putting on a pair of pants. Nothing is going to change the resentment for the rest of the child's life...and symbolically the child is that division between the mother and father.

>>1017336
deadbeat dads are crucified these days. Get it done through a court. demand a paternity test regardless of how much it may look like you, you won't be seen negatively by the courts for doing it. Just responsible. Definitely pull out the cash to sit down with a lawyer and get your bases covered.

Keep all relevant dox in a folder somewhere, you never know when you'll need to prove that you've been mailing checks to her.

>>1022005

Bruh, nobody is going to shift fucking national laws for your personal situation now. The kid is going to grow up with a roastie single mother have his life ruined for no reason.

This isn't some adoption case, its 50% of you, it came from your nutsack. Just fucking look after it. Go see it every two weeks, call it now and then.

Where is the kid at fault here?

Sidenote: If the kid is a girl (fucking don't bother contacting it or its roastie ass mother, leave the damn country.

>>1022112
I'm just saying that the man should have a say in an abortion... if a woman is getting cummed in she should know she's gonna have to have this talk. I get that the state could never force women to abort but it's pretty irresponsible to try to force the man to raise this kid if his heart isn't in it. You can't coerce people into raising kids. My parents divorced, my dad was an alcoholic and it was probably either the booze or the child care payments that killed him, anyway I was already born but my point is a shitty childhood is no childhood at all.

File: photos.demandstudios.com-getty-article-165-32-87610862_XS.jpg (18KB, 266x400px) Image search: [Google]

18KB, 266x400px

>>1022136
>I'm just saying that the man should have a say in an abortion...
it would be nice if you could make her say/sign up something in a video tape
stating that the man doesn't want to have any kids with her and neither support any future child coming out of her vagina, until stated otherwise.
in which she accepts that, then the man is 100% free from a woman's evil mind.

I think its very feminist and evil, to not being able/have a choice to do this thing stated above^

Men are just at A CLEAR DISVANTAGE, because i've seen it happen 3 times(3 children born because of the mother lies and not the father)that I am 100% sure that these men were really lied
the other times I am not counting them because I think they are the ones who lied and actually wanted the kid and now want to pussy out, simply because they are not prepared.
but lies from a woman to a man in order for money and self-maintenance it does happen and my mother is one
(have 2 little sisters out of a man she didn't even love, nobody can love that man, he is stupid and retarded as fuck, infact he been single his entire life until he met my mother at his age of 38 or something LOL)

sex for lust is just that
sex for procreation is just that

2 different concepts for sex. pleasure and procreation.
young people 99% of the time do it for pleasure
older people can be any of the two

making a 16-25 guy go through this when he didnt even ask for it, got lied and betrayed verbally,is simply evil

not because we both want to synchronize our orgasm and cum together because we are dirty lustful couple
shouldn't mean that maybe she'd want to keep the kid simply because she changed her mind, in which makes the man pretty much betrayed in this situation

It's like a prenupt sort of - in which you sign up you don't want to split assets/belongings after married with that woman, in which she accepts.
same thing should be able to be done for sex and procreation, not just about the marriage splitting house/car/money etc

>>1022064
>Two things that may have changed the predicament. However, that is not how you solve problems. You don't say, "Well, this wouldn't have been a problem if..." That is a distraction.
Pretty obvious you aren't a Supreme Court Justice

>>1022136
>it's pretty irresponsible to try to force the man to raise this kid if his heart isn't in it.

I bet you are a Republican. An open carry conservative.

>>1022556
Nothing wrong with that, anon. Shooting guns, having money, being connected, and not wasting my life on kids.

Fuck great.

>>1022471
>it would be nice if you could make her say/sign up something in a video tape

forgot to say: like in a porn movie - actresses sign up a contract and the contract sign and her face are video taped aswell.
what's in the contract?
well probably how much she earn from performing this movie
and if it is "creampie" video, probably is also included saying the actor is just doing his work and far from actually willing to procreate with an unknown stranger (in this case the actress named; ABCXYZ)

if that's the case for porn, why not with the casual sex with your own partner to make the man feel safe from verbal betrayal or for her own personal fuck up with the pill?
(supposing she fucked up or in the case she changes her mind and want to keep his sperm to form an actual baby, and without thinking: regardless of how harmful could be to the child life or even the father's life if he is not yet prepared for being very young)

if porn creampie videos do exist and there are no stories of these sluts getting pregnant for racketeering the actor's money from child support
its because there is some kind of contract you can legally sign with anybody to make sure that if she gets pregnant and gives birth, its because she wanted it and not because the man wanted, simply because the woman have the last word/decision to abort mission, since it is in her body.

>have anybody looked into that porn contract where the actress get cummed in? or any story of an actress giving birth and getting the actor's money for the child?

>>1022616
>because if I was an actor, I would NOT cum inside of that slut without safety first, needing sort of agreement contract to sign that I am not liable for her pregnancy and she signing the contract as she acknowledge this.

If I ever get on a serious relationship I will do it if it exist. Dont want to ruin my life nor my children lives either, because I am not prepared yet economically.

Laws are so flawed and so outdated.

>>1017463
>As a child of a nasty divorce and not seeing ma dad for the past 7 years (21), I can tell you its a pretty fucked up life bro.

Nice brah, I haven't seen my dad in 11 years. I'm the same age as you. He actually went to jail for not paying his child support. (kind of funny desu senpai because he was also a meth dealer)

>>1022646
>he was also a meth dealer
when does he gets released? I want some drugs, can you vouch for me so I get lower prices?

Thanks my friend

ps: I also know how it is to be raised with no parenting. I had my parents, in house, but its like they were dead pretty much. I wish I was adopted. My childhood couldve been a happy one instead with the attention a kid need.

>>1022556
No I'm just the son of a deadbeat dad. My twenties were pretty much a rightoff and I'm lucky I've gotten as far as I have.

>>1022659
Well when he went to jail for the child support thing that was all he was in for. He was only there for a few days until he paid up. He's only been busted with intent to sell for weed but they dropped the charges on that as well. He's never officially been busted for selling the meth. He was also addicted to it. The last time I saw him he was not in jail, but that was over ten years ago. I don't think he's in jail now but I could be wrong. He sent me some weird facebook messages a few years ago but that's the last I've heard of him.

Sorry man, I can't get you a good deal on drugs.

>>1022646
>No present dad
>Jailtime in the family
>Drug dealing in the family
Hello black anon.

>>1022679
I'm actually white believe it or not. My parents are from Mississippi though, which is white trash central.

>>1021988
>You're basically guaranteeing they will have a shitty life by not being there.
THE WOMAN IS GUARANTEEING THAT. How the fuck do you not understand this? Because of the totally fucked American legal system, it's all in the hands of the woman now.

What is compelling her to have the kid? Is someone holding a gun to her head, telling her she'll get her brains blown out if she doesn't bring the kid to term? Oh, no they aren't. She's choosing to do this.

Prove me wrong you fucking faggot

>>1022556
>Republican
>supporting abortion

Literally what the fuck are you talking about

>>1022858

Cry more. He chose to have sex with her and conceived as a result. Thus he has a portion of the responsibility.

You can do mental gymnastics all you like, but the fact remains this kid will have a harder life without him and as the father he has some responsibility towards his offspring. If he chooses to run off and hide his head in the sand then so be it. But don't pretend his hands are clean.

>>1022876
>Thus he has a portion of the responsibility.
Nope.

>this kid will have a harder life
The woman is choosing to have this kid knowing the father does not want to be a father. Ergo, it's her fault. Prove me wrong faggot. You still haven't proved me wrong.

>>1022881
If he didn't want to be the father then why did he have sex? You do realize that is the result of sexual intercourse right?

If the baby is not born, http://www.returnofkings.com/ 16089/how-to-convince-a-girl-to-get-an-abortion

If the baby is born. Ok, the baby will have a shitty life without you. But don't think you can be involved when it is an infant then exit the picture when the baby grows up. If you get involved when it is an infant you are pretty much involved for the next 7 years at least. I say this because, if you are getting involved to minimize trauma to be baby, you must necessarily stay, because abandoning once you have bonded will created more trauma.

I would think carefully about where you are in terms of your maturity. If you do not think you are fully mature, then I would tell the lady you will not be involved with the baby. Be firm, move to another city if necessary. The reason I say this is because the time commitment in caring for a baby is massive, and you will have very little time for yourself, therefore you will have very little time to work on yourself and mature as an individual for a number of years.

Figure out what the child support would be and try to negotiate less than that with the lady, but don't try and push it because you have no leverage.

There may be loop holes in child support, for example, if you create a business you may be able to employ yourself with minimal income. Maybe the child support will go off the income but not the profit retained in the business, which you can invest under the business name. This would seem to be a legit way to dodge the payments.

I would be very careful about wasting time and energy trying to dodge the payments in a non-legit way. Instead, focus on yourself. You are still young. One day you can start a family with the right lady. Don't make the situation worse for yourself.

Also, on the moral culpability of abandoning the baby from the beginning. In times gone by, this baby, born to a single mother, would be going up for adoption. The nurses would literally take the baby in the hospital.

>>1022890
To finish my thought, this is entirely the mother's choice to have and look after the baby and the culpability is on her shoulders.

Being a parent is extremely rewarding but being a single parent is extremely difficult. Decide if you will stay or leave and if you choose to leave be firmn and decisive. It is possible once the lady knows you won't stick around she will have an abortion.

>>1022884
If she knows this kid isn't going to have a father, why is she still having it? She knows that means it's going to have a shitty life. She is bringing the kid into the world, this is all entirely 100% her choice. You still haven't proved me wrong. Prove to me this is the father's fault. Prove that somehow it's his fault that she's not terminating the pregnancy.

And as a side note, I hope you're just playing devil's advocate because if you actually believe the stuff you're saying, you're more brainwashed than the anti-gun, let-the-refugees-in bleeding heart liberals.

The double standard is amazing. The man has responsibility of the child rearing, but he does not have a say in whether the conception is carried to term. See how this is fucked? Now we can't force women to have abortions, so I would say people need to dictate their terms on what should be done in the instance of a pregnancy. Like that poster up near the top of this thread suggested. The conversation about protection is important but this problem still exists because even the best attempts at protection can fail.

The autist-grade platitudes about the guy somehow becoming #1 dad after his girlfriend extorts him into fatherhood is total bullshit.

Or you could be a normal 21st century man and be gay.

OP, can I also say, this is very serious and will have major impact on your life. Do not get sentimental.

>>1022898
>If she knows this kid isn't going to have a father, why is she still having it?

Maybe she believes abortion is equivalent to taking a life

>>1022918
>maybe she believes she can extract the 'father' of her unwanted child for tens of thousands of dollars a year without doing shit

>>1022904
>Or you could be a normal 21st century man and be gay.
This whole thread is proof of that.

>>1022918
And if I believed that shooting someone in the head wasn't taking a life, that wouldn't make it true now would it?

So let's do this again, hPjd94h5. Knowing that the woman is in complete control over whether or not this fetus is carried to term, prove that the man is at fault for this kid being brought into the world.

>>1023021
If he was drunk and she wasn't then by US law he was raped.

>>1023036
You know what's funny? That actually doesn't matter. The legal system thinks men are always at fault, even when they aren't.

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2014/09/02/statutory-rape-victim-child-support/14953965/

http://articles.chicagotribune.com/1996-12-22/features/9612220045_1_pay-child-support-child-support-behalf

It's almost comical how backwards laws are when it comes to men and sex. Not only do men not have any "rights", they are actually liable for crimes committed *against* them. Yay America. Hail freedom.

>>1017336

If you are forced to give child support just move to Florida. They can't get jack shit from you and you don't have to worry about anything. ...unless they move there

>>1022881
Women often argue here that the social pressure is brutal and it fucks you up quite a lot, because since birth they´re being bombarded with family and children and shit, and abortion feels like they´re a failure.

Also that they´re the ones that have to go through the abortion itself and have the future child ripped off them.

I agree the laws are completely absurd. Their goal -make sure the child doesn´t lack money- is good, but the execution is completely awful.

Still, I think we shouldn´t disregard so easily that it´s a hard and painful thing for women to do. And that, as you know, women act more on their feelings than their thinking.

OP chose to sleep with a person who belongs to a group known for its irrationality and feeling-driven behavior. It´s pointless to blame a woman on not doing the rational thing to do. You, as the man, should know better than to deal with a woman if you don´t know how to, can´t, or can´t afford the consequences of not being able to lead her into what you want her to do.

It´s like blaming a dog for eating a steak while you weren´t looking at it. The dog also knows it´s not doing the right thing - he knows he has his own food and that he just stole from you, and you´ll be angry. But still it does it because feelings. But that´s just how it works. It´s your fault because you weren´t careful enough.

>>1017336
>7336 [Reply]▶>>1023103
>So I found out that I got an ex girlfriend prego and now she is demanding I pay child support. Is

you're fucked my boy
become a crook

>>1023127
>It´s like blaming a dog for eating a steak while you weren´t looking at it. The dog also knows it´s not doing the right thing - he knows he has his own food and that he just stole from you, and you´ll be angry. But still it does it because feelings. But that´s just how it works. It´s your fault because you weren´t careful enough.
Are you suggesting that OP, to get a better understanding of himself, should shit on the rug next time he meets with the woman he impregnated and her lawyer?

>>1023127
I may be a dick but I do think women are smarter than dogs. The thing is here, women are getting cummed in and don't seem to anticipate the train wreck that is an unwanted pregnancy. Yes, men should understand this risk too but conception should not = extortion. This does not help the situation. If guys fsil to discuss what they will do in the event of conception then they fucked up for sure, but that should not enslave them for 20 years. You cannot coerce fatherhood, you cannot coerce a family into existence and this type of policy undermines men's sovereignty and poisons the well of typical relationships.

>>1023296
I´m not sure whether you didn´t understand my post properly or I´m completely missing your point.

>>1023301
I agree, but right now that´s the law, and it´s up to the man to wise up and ensure his own safety. It´s not ideal, but it´s what we´ve got until those laws get updated.

Some women are smarter than dogs. Most let their emotions do all the thinking and aren´t any more trustworthy than a chihuahua.
Same happens with many men. It´s not really about the sex itself, but about the upbringing. And most women grow up hearing that it´s always the man´s fault when something happens, so they don´t really feel the need to think other than as a way to rationalize their feelings.

>>1022679
He said meth dummy