Feels thread continue During the integrality of my pathetic

>>745010454
a good 2 or 3

>>745010454
Please learn to spell.

homefag here
made this last night, put it in a thread last night, i said id be on again tonight so im here again

home
>be me
>be 15, summer before highschool sophomore
>been into pc gaming for a while, but never seriously
>Friend at school tells me about TF2
>play it a ton
>make friends on the game
>watch them come and go
>get into trading for profit
>frequent a trade server (Harpoon Gaming All Trade #2)
>join the little community
>make this one friend
>find out they’re a girl when she uses her mic (before that she just talked through text chat)
>lets call her qweet
>she invites me to a discord server, where we start seriously becoming friends
>I meet many other people
>but one in particular, a guy
>lets call him max
>think I finally found a place to call home
>invite irl friend to the server
>lets call him mint
>the four of us become amazing friends

home 2>we pubstomp TF2 then move onto other games (but always coming back)
>max buys everyone Borderlands 2 goty edition
>play the shit out of that, max and I get to level 50 while the other 2 lag behind
>max and I get real close
>meet more people in a tf2 pub
>lets call them hawkeye (female, motherly), saint (hawkeye’s bf, gamer chad), and dreemur (exactly like me in every way)
>invite them to the discord server
>friendliness
>qweet can no longer handle the stress of running a discord server
>fucking deletes it
>panicinmypants.mov
>can only message my friends privately
>some of them get pissed off
>don’t talk to dreemur or saint for a few days, scared to lose them
>max creates new discord server
>somehow reigns everyone in
>gets it organized again
>feel alright again

home 3
>feel a sense of home
>more people continue joining
>my family situation gets worse
>yelled at daily
>made fun of
>parents fight
>just a lot of anger
>spend days in my room
>don’t see my family for days
>enjoy my time, only talking to online friends
>school starts again
>entire world fucks me up the ass, have to be away from friends
>one day hawkeye and max are playing terraria together
>ask to join
>”yeah, sure anon”
>create new character
>really proud of the design, made it look exactly like John Egbert
>jam with them for a while
>eventually they tell me to put all my shit in a chest
>oblige cuz idk
>”server has closed”
>”sorry anon, we want to play alone right now”
>spend rest of day fucking around alone on my own world, waiting to be invited back
>never happens

home 4
>feel empty
>that night i go downstairs to get food, end up eating with family
>get really pissed off and annoyed at family because they are cunts
>come back up, join the discord
>everyone is in the vc but no one is talking
>familiar ambient sounds of clicks and sniffles
>calms me down a ton
>feel rather mellow
>don’t tell friends about dinner or how i was mad in the first place
>get invited to play with them again
>feel good
>actual happiness


this is how a family should be, how a home should treat a person


home
im home

home 5 (end)
>break down on the voice chat
>tell everyone thank you
>leave the vc
>cry for the rest of the night
>go to school
>hug mint
home
>get get back to my house
>get on discord
>join the vc to max, mint, hawkeye, saint, and dreemur laughing and having a good time
home
>after a few days qweet disappears off steam and discord and everything
>cant find her
>home…?
>everyone stops talking
>discord server of ghosts
no more home
>empty
>empty
>empty
>mint stops talking to me irl
>empty
>empty
>empty
>never talk to anyone in that group again
>alone to this day