Feels/depression thread. Post stories, images, and music.

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i want to feel love but i cant give anything in return

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>>744749204
Wanna talk about it?

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girl that I like has a bf :(

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>>744751347

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>>744751585

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>>744751687

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>>744751763

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Nobody will ever love me because of who I am. I hurt my last girlfriend who I loved with all my heart (she loved me twice as much). I hurt my mother who loves me. Nobody will ever love me again because of who I am. But I don´t care anymore. I just want to improve myself so that society will accept me as a hard worker but an asshole. Seems like leaving you guys here will be another sign of my improvement. Gotta waste time more uselully. Gotta improve.

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>>744751889

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>>744752026

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>>744752104

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>>744752664

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>>744752738

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>>744752746

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>>744753034

I don't find anything fun anymore.
I try to play video games, the only thing I've ever been "good at" and get no enjoyment anymore.
I have been on medication for the last few months and I only feel as if its not helping at all.
I've been exercising, eating healthy and socializing but I only feel worse.
I've been drinking alcohol to try and help myself sleep, but it hardly works.
Can anyone recommend anything else that I could try?
The only thing I want is to be happy again, and I feel like it's never going to happen.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HhZaHf8RP6g

nice sad song

>>744753304
I feel the same way. I don't find games that fun these days.

I have hundreds of GB of downloaded games just waiting to be played but I have no thrust, no drive to slap them on. I don't know why.

Depending on where you live, have you tried...walking? That's usually therapeutic for me, I just walk to far off places and commute home. Or sometimes the reverse. I take the bus to somewhere far and then walk home. It feels....nice. Ish.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TtHZs4GrarY

This song hit me really fucking hard because these thoughts frequently cross my mind.

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>>744753564

People laugh at me but even that doesn't make me want to go to gym, I just don't have the energy. How do I elevate my energy levels through the roof? Coffee wont help. I have low test but not low enough for public healtcare to give a shit.

>>744753564
This! And also, autumn has come, pretty much the best time for melancholic walks.
A good time to be sad.

>>744751526
They always do move on and find the next one girls are a dime a dozen

>>744753698

stop jerking off for starters

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kH1rZtXt0AQ&list=RDkH1rZtXt0AQ

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No matter how much I eat I still feel empty.https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=3vGhH2Fe5qY

>>744754044
Listen to this alone.

>>744753304
What do they have you on? Also alcohol makes the medicine not work in some cases I cut that shit out and stuck to my medicine and I'm 100% better because of it, I'm not saying stop drinking, try it for a week or two and you will notice the difference

>>744753564
I live in a city, so its harder for me to do that, but i do walk around a nearby park sometimes.
I just dont know what to do with my life anymore.

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Never been able to get a proper gf, and actually keep it for longer periods than 3-6 months, finally met a girl thats a qt but i can't even get myself to take any steps to do anything, apperently she send me signals that she wanted something, and i can't pick up on them

why me

>>744754259
Just say fuckit and be yourself.

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who drinkin 2nyt

>>744754336
Pretty much

>>744754171
I'm on mirtazapine.

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any1 tried citalopram it hasnt doesnt anything for me :(

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Anyone have all these random old memories rushing back into their heads too? Vivid ones, of being with friends and family. Being out doors on a nice day, with a bright blue beautiful sky. The wind against your cheeks, and the smell of spring air.

What went wrong...

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>>744754785

>>744754453
Do you think it's a little strong or that it's just not working, there are so many types out there, i would let your doctor know because I was on one for 12 years in switch i drove my self mad because I built a tolerance to it and had to switch

>>744754785
i became sentient

I live in Nova Scotia Canada, full of redneck normies who hate change.

>>744754785
Yeah it takes time just keep your self busy

>>744754785
You can relive it again when you have children.

>>744754959
I feel like it isn't strong enough tbh.
I think I'll be going back to the doctors sometime soon to talk about upping dosage or changing medication type.

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i moved back home to California, leaving a successful job and gf behind because i hated said job and New York was awful and i have a whole mess of fucking shit wrong with me.

now i'm going to a psychiatrist and taking medication for the first time and i have to do it all by myself and that's why i'm on 4chan for the first time in four years.

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>>744751995
are you me? it sounds like you are me.

>>744754259
Nobody can pick up on them.

Women and their signals are like the game Myst. Sure you can figure out the puzzles ... as long as you have a fucking strategy guide.

https://youtu.be/gBU6GkseD1w

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https://youtu.be/DWkuItbsQ74

>>744753698
I'm not sure. Just try to work with the energy levels you have?

>>744754186
Oh, I live in the middle of the biggest metropolitan area in my country. Dunno how safe yours is but I tend to stick to main roads or safe areas when I want to (but I do go to sketchy areas because why not).

As long as you stay under the radar and youhave some reasonable escaping skills, you should be fine.

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>>744754383

>>744749148
>be me
>just got a bj from my girlfriend a few minutes ago.
>feeling pretty good right now

>>744754785
I've been getting it more and more the past few months. I'm in my 30s so still relatively young. But I've been finding myself reminiscing about how places used to look decades ago, and memories of me and my family in those places.

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>>744755863
Welcome /b/ack.

>>744757397
good job. pics?

>>744757091
Story of my life.

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>>744757397

I'm too sober for this thread lmao, got real way too fast

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_OuRlb1rc1I
> Have some depressive music
> Quite interested in what y'all fags think about this

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>>744756736
This makes me feel like such a failure, and rightfully so.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isekWlmtibM

I'm broke, only got $20. I'm going buy some canned food, chips and vodka. I'm gong to be homeless in a couple weeks. I don't care anymore.

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>>744754383
that's some potent stuff man, taste good tho

>>744749148
I moved away from my friends in year 9 I came back for the holidays to keep the connection, but when I moved back I ended up be more alone then ever I'm 19, dropped out of school, my grandpa died two weeks ago, I'm looking after my grandma, I've realised that I'm never going to see my sister again, been fucked over in every relationship I've been in, mums into meth, dads physically abusive that's why I moved back to my grandma's. Sometimes I just want to an hero

>>744749204
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89aKm-7WwLQ

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>>744758058
just stay alive, anon

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>>744758550
at least we have here, man. sometimes i just go to enjoy nudes of women I know I'll never ever see IRL

>>744759791
nah, if it comes to it I'll gladly kill myself.

>>744760041
Good luck, cousin

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.

>>744755175
were it so easy

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>>744749148
Been having a rough break up with a girl i met 2 years ago on 4chan
She actually was a girl, we met up, things proceeded from there

She broke up out of the blue and it's been nagging at me a lot
Week before that everything seemed fine, we were cuddling in bed i almost mustered up to tell her the 3 words
And then this

Fuck

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Have some feels with extra tears

moved to toronto coinciding with meeting a girl from web I knew for years,
meet, and aint no spark there,

end up having her tell me she was upset about it not panning out.

now im in my place trying to make frands

>>744757515
God damn it! I lost...

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I lost everything over a girl 3 years ago. My house, my career, my independence. Drunk myself into a hole and now I depend on my parents for shelter. Feels degrading as fuck, but I'm slowly crawling my way out. Joining the Air Force in a year. Trying to carefully ration out my money, squeeze in a temp job, and go to college in the interim. I'm holding on. But barely. Hope the rest of you in this thread are too. Better times are coming.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxcYSEcH8Fk

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>>744762722
I'm sorry anon.

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2015/2016 was some of the best times of my life
My friends all moved away back home in late 2016 and I haven't seen them ever since

2017, has been one of the loneliest years of my life and I am afraid I am getting closer to death everyday. I have nobody anymore, and nothing to do with my free time.

Oh, god how I miss having friends

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>>744753304
Just snap out of it.

>>744762824
at least you have the memories

>>744762996
I have incredible memories, but now they are just that. I am alone, all alone

>>744763195
same here man
best friends moved away with their SOs
got broken up with and am now completely alone
cry myself to sleep at home

>>744763195
We're all alone anon. It's how you cope with that fact that defines your strength and force of will.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=viAbMzA1mvk

Suck his dick

I'm feel close to dropping everything and living like a hermit.

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>>744764673
But too many responsibilities. It's too much. Black pill will not go down. Deep down I know I won't but I want to. It's constant. Chronic pain also eating away.

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I was borned in Russia.
Now me 18, and i'm living in FUCKING RUSSIA!
It's like ur Detroit, but its common city in this FUCKING COUNTRY.
This is the only and one of the most horrible causes for depression.
And probably, I'll never leave here. Nobody will let go.
You were born in shit.
And die in the shit.

>>744753304
As someone who has fought with depression, let me tell you it really is as easy as stop being weak and grow a fucking pair.

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>>744751526
Girls suck dude. It's a virgin wizard thing to say but they're truly terrible creatures, which is why it's such a shame we need them.
Find the one you hate the least.

>>744752746
In this exact position right now
I feel for bird skeleton dude

>>744765080
Is there anything keeping you there. Move South Russia warmer?

>>744764673
I want this, too.

>>744749204
are u actually retarded?

>>744751500
idiot

Get out of that frame of being

https://www.dothethingneedsdoing.com/tips-tools/meditation

>>744766258
Please elaborate.

>>744765517
the only thing that keeps me is subconscious censure. The program that every parent puts in you, who was born in the USSR.
If you translate from Russian - "Where you were born, there you are useful"
They are afraid that someone will leave this bucket of crabs, so they will do everything that this "Someone" will never leave.
I will never understand this.
%%I do not have any money at now.%%
But, whenever, i'll leave this.
I'll be a hentai artist, then I'll become a concept artist.
I will move somewhere to Europe, to a quiet town, I will live my life, and draw. Maybe even get married.
Wish me luck, maybe ...
[spoiler] And sorry for my English[/spoiler]

>>744766502
the first thing is, there is no thing as a human need for companionship. its you, not human nature.
There is no real reason for someone not to fit. you can fit into a community. youre just trying to fit into the wrong ones.
also, you dont make friends by trying to make friends...

ps. dont use the word elaborate. just by that alone you seem annoying af... maybe find some fellow annoying people

>>744753229
wow, hit close to home

>>744766916
I can't make any friends…that's the point. Not to mention the fact that I can't stand the presence of humans.

>>744749148
>be me
End.
I want to kill myself but im a pussy.

>>744767415
thats the kind of reply i wanted. now the question is why do you want friends? especially when u now mentioned you dont like the presence of others

>>744766916
That doesnt sound like a realistic treatment for this number of people

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My girlfriend left me for her abusive ex. When I say abusive I mean he already has made her cry multiple times and caused her to self harm in the 2 weeks she's been away from me.
She tried contacting me but I ignored her. I can't let myself get hurt again.

>>744767604
Do the ol' car trick.
If you have a car

>>744767604
Can i ask why?

>>744767717
i dont understand

Jokes besides. Im autistic and it sucks. I want a normal life. Grade 2 autism btw

>been addicted to heroin for about 10 months now
>Had pretty decent job for my situation, no college, no parents, no safety net in life 25yo
>Working my way up in a corporation, 45k yearly, really enjoyed it to
>Been dating girl for about 5 years
>Shes cute and sweet but an absolute mess, can hardly cope with anything adult like in life
>Wasted all my savings and more, 5k+, keeping us going, paying for LITERALLY everything while she sat at home making excuses for being a peice of shit
>Have tried pushing her away she won't go hates her separated parents who aren't that bad and have it well off so she has two choices
>Just got fired last week
>Idk what I'm gonna do I have like $500+ left to my name but everything paid for this month at least
>Really bad teeth no insurance now
>Been realizing a lot lately, I don't have room to panic
>Feel like deep inside of me this is what I wanted
>I have about 8k in a retirement, but can't touch till next month and will be penalized like 20% plus pay taxes on it next tax season.
>GF 23 yo has a shitty barista job making right about minimum wage maybe 20 hrs a week and thinks she's doing her part, has ran from the law which will be after her at any given time I might add
>I hate her. But she's all I have really, got my roommate/best friend and little brother and his dad

>>744768340
>The end might be soon for me.
>Least I quit smoking weed, but heroin is hard to kick, I'm close to being off but gf isn't at all close and I can't afford it anymore.
>Often think if she would have been a productive force in my life this wouldn't be this way.
>Part of me has hated her since we started dating and all the lies she's told about people she's been with before
>I'm rambling at this point. Just hard to make sense of things. I wish she was gone so I could have space. I can't ever decide if she is gonna lead me to another dead end from taking care of her.
>Lemme add, she has no car, no phone, smokes a pack a day, filthy cat who has had 3 litters this year one just recently, fucking dog, fleas all in the house. Almost killed cat last night.
>I would have done really well in life if the cards were right. I did try. I had happy times. Gonna fix everything up regardless but prepared to kms soon if it doesn't get back up to par with my distant past, 2 years ago I was perfect. And didn't have as much of the nice shit I have now. Hoping this all was one entangled big step.
>Times arrow---->
Maybe you guys have advice? I have a great personality, charisma. I am smart, I just get down and lazy about seeing the point in my life when it seems so hollow.

>>744768060
How it feels? Serious question. U feel diferent from all the people?

>>744767668
Because I sometimes feel that I want to fit in somewhere. But it only leads to my being backstabbed. And then I end up back where I started with hating people. It's a vicious circle. I can't seem to stop it, but that's exactly why I want to move far away and live in solitude for the rest of my life.

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Stop being depress anons, it's gonna be okay

>>744768437
You already know what to do, there's no point of being in a relationship if the other person becomes a liability. YOUR happiness comes first before anyone elses, so just find out a way to get rid of her. It'll such at first, but it will be worth it in the long run. Good luck my man.

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>>744755555
True quints.
>witnessed

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>>744757384
>>744754383

>>744769372
Pleb. Whisky or die

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>>744749148
I'm feeling empty for 3 weeks now.
I just feel so disconected from everyone, dont wanne kill my self but dont wanne life either.

should I get help?

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>>744751687

>>744770213
Depends on what kind of help.

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I threw a party for my friends at my house. I do this quite frequently even though i don't really enjoy them ,but they do, because every time the night just devolves to me just sitting alone staring at the floor bobbing my head to the beat of a song trying not to look up at the happy people in front of me. Anyone else just feel like they are just missing something?

>>744768437
whore her out bro a lot dudes will pay top dollar if shes at least a 6

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>>744754383
Only the best.

>>744766916
dude, you are a fucking pretentious retard.
you seriously just sound like you are making excuses for being a fucking loser. pathetic faggot.

>>744770528
like should I tell my doc or something, the only person I could tell about these kinds of things was my girlfriend. but now idk what to do.

I want you to give me some advice or at least just to read me.
There is one friend (female) who I told her everything and so she does, I've tell her about how much I love some other female and so she does (just a little, like once in a month or less) but she stills tell me a lot about her day but the problem is that I fell in love with her since April but I wasn't sure what I was feeling because the other female.
So a few days was my birthday and she wrote me a letter but she refers to me a lot as a friend and told me she love me as a friend (The letter wasn't in english and in this language there are different ways to say someone you love her/him but she used the common term for friends.

>She put her perfume on the the letter
>She usually says she loves me when I'm sad or when I say the same no her, she says it in the same way as I did and sometimes even more

>>I don't know what to do, because I'm also in love with the other female and I feel like shit because I feel this for two persons

>>>Any question or advice?

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>>744749148

>>744771314
Do you want to be put on prescription medication?

>inb4 mandatory this isn't even my final feel pic

My best friend is a girl (fuckfriend). Is that sad? I fucking love her.

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>>744771552

Well got drunk with my girl last night and I found out she's been with a dude with a 11 inch dick. Now I feel like my average dick isn't enough even tho she tells me all the time she loves it. And tells me Mr 11 incher was not fun painfully and he was a 3 pump chump. I have stamina but man I wish I had a bigger dick.

>>744771427
Also the two of them are in love or were in love with the same male, who is also my friend.
I'm so screwed up because I have a lot of fucking shit in my head cause of this
I think I hate him, but he is also someone who I can count with and he is the same shit as me, so we can be comfortable with each other.

>>744771607
Why would that be sad?

>>744771786
Idk. Most guys have a male best friend.

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>>744771458
do those really work? can keep me from feeling disconnected and wanting to die? that would be pretty nice I guess

im crying again all because of that girl
again

fuck me

>>744772098
what did she do?

>>744772201
broke up with me, twice now over the course of 2 years
not the fact that she broke up is killing me inside, but the fact that she can get over the last 2 years in an instant as it seems hurts like hell, i'm not part of her life anymore even though 3 weeks ago we were having fun together, smoking some weed for the first time together, really opening our selves up to each other
and now, nothing

>>744772098
Same here. I fucking hate u bitch lasagna. But i love you

>>744772345
damn man, my gf broke up with me 3 weeks ago aswell, very next day already chilling with her ex and heppy(I thought). was fucking angry and mad that is seemed to not hit her at all, then one of her friends told me she was crying all the time.

moral of the story maby shes just not showing it, but you dont just get over 2 years that.

still rought m'dud :(

>>744772745
yeah well, i'm blocked on every texting social media there is
we had a whopping 4 minute break up talk in which i asked her what i should do with her stuff, her response was "don't think about that now. when things have settled we can talk about this again"
fucking hell man

im an alcoholic meds. i never had any direction, even when i was a kid i never had one of those "i wanna be a fireman!" shitty household, i think whatevers wrong with me just plain never got noticed. family hates me and disowned me because im a reflection of their own shortcomigs. joined the military because i was sick of dead end jobs and 2 meals a day in an apartment without a chair.

the only time i ever feel anything is when i drink, i can at least appreciate things. that, and when i was in love. but as much as she tried, bless her soul, im unlovable.

and so here i am, with a beer in my hand,
wishing for a fabled promised land
where i can feel a spark of anything
because its better to feel nothing at all

and trust me i know
because you reap what you sew
and in my case i tried to grow ash
and hoped through the rain that this will pass

Tomorrow i'll be a dad. My first one. 5:00 am to be exact.

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>mfw today is World Suicide Prevention Day and no one knows is because no one cares

>>744773117
Girl? Boy? Congrats, bro.

>>744773117
congrats anon
hope ill be one too some day

>>744772020
A lot of them have placebo effects, but I can't say for sure in my case, since I've never been prescribed medication. It might have to come down to that for me, though, if my current situation persists.

>>744773211
Boy! Sebastian is his name

>>744765105
>Sad troll hides his sadness by trolling.

It's ok anon, you don't have to hide your sadness. Let it out.

>>744773117
Go on, dude. Give him a nice life

>>744773117
if nothing else, just know that its your job to not have him end up as depressed as you. or me. or us. give him the life you wish you had. you dont need to feel anything from it other than the knowing that he wont be sad like you and us.

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>>744772872
aw man, nothing worse than losing you're SO in a bad break up.
for what its worth, I feel you man.
and hey, got some free stuff out if it!

>>744774422
was a shitty way to break up
feel like telling her that
thanks anon

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treat yourself with a piece of internet cake anon

you may not feel today but you will soon <3

>>744751763
I know it's not real but dammit it got me regardless

>>744775529
what if someone has never felt anything? :l

I'm emotionally stupid. I'm rough and i Hurt People probably manipulate them i don't know
The core of who i am is rotten

I'm ashamed and guilty all the time
Wonder how i still have friends

>>744775864
are you my ex gf

>>744775972
I've never felt love or sexual interest.

>>744775698
there will come the time you will again. dark times come, but only through the dark we can truly appreciate how the light feels like. hand in there anon

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The only reason youre feeling down is because you havent hit the bottom yet.
And the impact hasnt killed you.
Kill the child.
They dont love you, they wont love you, they never will.
And "they" can be "you" too.
If you hate yourself, good, it means you know there's something wrong with you.
So fix it even if it kills you. Especially if it kills you.
Stop being a little bitch and break your hymen.

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>>744774484
np anon, life get better.
IK it might not feel like it but its really does, you'll meet someone else who really cares for you and this girl will be just another thot from the past.

>>744753304
psychedelics my man

>>744776580
it's sad that she has to be my past now

>>744775864
atleast u got friend.

>>744774410
This hurts af

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I want to feel feels for women but every interaction I seem to have just makes them seem even more shallow and uninteresting than they were before.

Pic related. I don't fucking get it. Watched IT on release day, entire thing ruined by slutty trollops squealing and taking selfies with snap chat filters the whole way through.

But if everyone else is cool with it then I'll assume I must have the problem.

I just describe or understand how I feel, can't even explain it to m therapist, it looks like I don't want to talk.

Only thing I know is that I feel like shit and living isn't worth it, but don't plan to kill myself

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>>744752104

>>744777224
just can't*

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>how do I get gf
>just be yourself dude
>I´ve always been myself, nobody likes myself

Send help.

Also soon...
>>744777777

>>744768437
cold turkey

28 years old,moved to a new city, no friends and people from my work are all 45+ years old men.how and where do I meet new woman?

No stories here, only laying on bed and crying

>>744776396
i hit the bottom a while ago, now i can´t feel anything, nor sadnes or happines, not enjoy or boring im just like a (robot?)

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>>744777862
lots of 45+ year old men? you'll have to make do

should i send her a sms since im blocked everywhere else

im fucking lost
feeling alone since shes gone

>>744778161
if she has block you, then just stop, try to life without her, or find another girl that can feel a bit of the emptyness she left in you

>>744778304
no clue where to find a new girl, work under the week , close friends moved away
i want to know if she picks up her stuff or what i should do with them

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this picture
literally

>>744749148
I don't get it /b/. I have a car, a job I enjoy, a cute GF who likes me for who I am, a supportive family, a place of my own, and good health.

Why do I feel so empty?

>stuck in small town with no friends or family
>going though college, some people like to make fun of me
>mental breakdown last year of college
>depression therapy
>one of the guys that made fun of me gets job at the psych place in the hospital
>gives out all my private medical info, tells people I'm unstable and going to go shoot people or something

If you have depression don't even bother trying to get help.You will just completely ruin any chance you had at recovery or getting a social life if people find out.

>>744777862
Online dating is all that's left m8

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>>744778943

im going to say something for all the people here.
Its a bullshit when someone hurt u, i know it, my wife cheated on me with my best friend. (he was married too) you have 3 ways of dealing with it, one is with hate, 2 depression and the other one is breaking your insides.

i deal with it breaking my insides, and its the worst thing u can do, it sucks, everything sucks
and it will always suck, so go full rage mode (don´t do anything illegal) or killyourself

>>744779252
i cant anon all i do is cry
days i stop crying thn im reminded of stuff we did

my life began pretty normally. i was born into a decently wealthy family and shared a house with three other siblings, one a boy like me, and the other two girls. they are all roughly ten years older than me. everything started changing when my brother got jealous of me, he wanted my parents to pay attention to him again. i was the world to mom and dad. he quickly took drastic measures, seeking out bad crowds to hang in, taking up drug and alcohol use. fast forward a few years, he's developed a heroin addiction and my mom felt too guilty not to give him money for more whenever he needed it. it nearly drove the whole family into poverty. a few years pass again, and my mother's own addiction, smoking, caught up with her. she was diagnosed with lung cancer, and did not make it. i had to witness her death at the age of eight years old. my dad nearly committed suicide that day, but stopped himself when he realized I was the one thing left in the world that was still dependant on him. by this point, my siblings were all grown, out living their own, albeit unsuccessful lives. they all dropped out of school and were driven into their own deep, dark pits of loneliness and regret, off in cheap apartments by themselves, or simply out on the street. one of my sisters even had a child at the age of 16. my mother's only dying wish was that i'd attend college, and succeed where everyone else in my family has failed. after grieving for months, my father sought out a new woman, specifically one with experience in raising children up to college, in order to realize that dream of hers. the woman he met would emotionally and occasionally physically abuse me for the next ten years, up until the ripe age of 18, where even now I am still not entirely free of her. while saving for higher education, trying to avoid student loans at all costs, I have to stay at my father's house, where she often comes to belittle me and remind me how much better she is than me.

>>744774140
The lonely re such delicate things

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>>744779577
yo anon, realize that shes not worth ur time, if she just ended it after 2 years like its nothing.
serouisly.
If she blocked you after the time you had together realize how in-empathetic she is.

if I was U, I'd call my mom or like a close friend to talk with.

>>744780262
>If she blocked you after the time you had together realize how in-empathetic she is.
this hurts more than the breakup
i know you're right anon i know it
but my heart was really into investing into this after a really shitty breakup 4 years ago

>>744779778
so, i have to act fast. if i dont decide what i want soon, my future could be changed forever. i dont even know whether i want to attend college anymore, but the pressure is enormous. its what my entire life has been building up to.

in order to distract myself i occasionally play a competitive game. well. not occasionally. more like all the time. its become a pretty big part of my life, because its given me a place to feel validity. ive made plenty of friends and even made a pretty decent name for myself in the community of the game. until recently, ive started to seriously lose whatever skill i had at it. people have been humiliating me left and right over it, i lost a tour game vs someone who hasnt been playing in ages, compared to my several years. for my own sake i decided to disappear from the community. but being away from it for so long has really caused me to realize how little i am, how few talents i have, how few friends i have, if any true ones at all. things like drawing and music and writing used to always inspire me, but lately its all kind of dried up. im not exactly sure where to go from here, or what new hobby to take up. leaving behind something that ive invested so much time in has also left me pretty upset. im not sure what to do from this point onward.

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>>744750033
that morrissey feel

My life has actually been pretty good, it's just that I'm a fucking sensitive erratic baby. Friends and Radiohead have helped me through some tough shit, so I have that to be thankful for.

I'll sometimes feel like pure shit; I'm just constantly super "eh" and unemotional at this point.