I had to cancel Friday night D&D due to Irma, any good

>>744598860
can you feel it mr.krabs?

I had to as well. My friend's family forced him to evacuate

I crit missed and accidentally killed my friend while fighting a chain demon. I was chaotic evil so I didn't have to feel bad about it.

>>744598860
Where are you located?

>>744599425
Jacksonville FL

>>744599577
Josh?

>>744599606
No, but I know a Josh O'steen.

>>744599787
I thought you might be a party member of mine.

>>744599978
Class-wise, what do you usually run?

>>744600114
Im a kenku rogue

>>744598860
Someone post that screencap of the Mr Bearington story.

I don't really have any good stories. I remember having a lot of fun playing AD&D back in the day, but it was mostly running gags, monty python references, and dumb shit, nothing worthy of a story.

I did have a wholly incompetent DM once who let me make a seemingly harmless enchantment for a sword that would let holding the sword act as the equivalent of wearing any magic item that the sword was currently touching. If, for example, I put a ring of invisibility on the hilt, it was the same as putting it on my finger. I somehow managed to convince him that there should be no limit to how many magic items this sword could handle, and I guess he didn't know there were rules against wearing more than one magic ring/talisman/whatever for game balance reasons.
Long story short, this sword wound up with a handle made of magic rings, with five more magic rings as finger/thumb holes so the sword could't be knocked out of his hand, four types of dragon teeth, a unicorn horn, a minotaur horn, some necro-priestesses magic gold Ankh, and eventually a hollowed out handle with a screw-on pommel to make a storage space in the handle. I then started picking fights with low level deities I knew I couldn't beat, just in the hopes of successfully parrying their weapon as an excuse to search the battleground (after running away) for slivers of metal or scraps of leather from things like Saberhagen's swords, one of the Norn's whips, a splinter of wood from Mjolnir's handle, and so on and so forth.
Eventually the status effects didn't really matter, because the sword's damage and THAC0 was absurd and thanks to the ricockulous combination of magic items that were "touching" the sword by being in the handle it damaged Hit Points, Hit Dice, Str, Intelligence, Dex, Con, and LEVELS.
Attack a lvl 16 Paladin?
Hit him one time and he's lvl 0, retarded, paralyzed, comatose, and totally helpless.

> Bored at school.
> Never played D&D.
> Don't know where buy a gametable like that.
> Find a lost cardboard for projects.
> Take my sharpies and make a map very randomly.
> I am say to my 2 bros, "Hey, come and play this game".
> "What is this anon?".
> "I called it Purple Quest".

> Since that day, your last D&D parody was called Purple Quest 5: The Order of the End.

:'(

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>>>/tg/

Get out of here, niggers.

>>744601285
>save vs turn undead
I will not be turned away.

I got one, it was about six years ago when i was living with my collage roommate.

>roommate is running a campaing
>i had a some what conflicting schedule so i didnt partake
>he had to go back home for a weekend but the group wanted to play
>i was availible so i was asked to subsitute DM that night
>told the group i didnt want to step on my roomates toes so we agreed to put the main story on the back burner
>team is poor and under equiped
>they decide the team should get day jobs for the session
>seems perfect
>barb gets work as a blacksmith and is paid a good amount
>ranger gets job training horses and other creatures for the town guard
>cleric is good on cash so he goes to the church and bar the whole time
>so far so good. people are finding jobs and will be ready to quest next week
>this is where it all goes wrong
>wizard and bard come up with this plan to get over powered positions in town
>i didnt know that the court wizard in town had just died
>wizard and bard talk thier way into becoming interim co-court wizards
>cont?

>>744598860
>Friday night D&D
neckbeard virgin confirmed

I killed my friends character because I hated the way he played. He was always emo and wanted to do his own side quests cuz he was a dual wielding ranger faggot that just wanted to be a fucking outlaw cuck all the God damned time.

One time he colluded with the dm about becoming a ware dragon and he turned into one then back into a half elf after his dragon episode. So I fucking killed him no prob. Argued to dm that there's no way for my character to have known he was still an ally.

No regrets.

>>744601869
Not OP here.

I started playing D&D about a year ago with some friends of mine. I'm married with kids.

Stereotypes are not always accurate. Unless they're about niggers. Then they are.

>>744601773
Cont

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>>744600744
Pic related: Los Tiburon.

Another classic: Eric and the Dread Gazebo.

>>744602363
so they got bigger dicks and are true men that breed you into extinction but you don't care because white boipussy is meant to serve true men because your pathetic dick can't satisfy your wife

ok, if you say so

>>744602515
Nice.
But can he suplex a train?

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>>744602527

>>744602363
You really think your wife isn't fooling around when you're off roleplaying?

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>>744600744
>>744598860
Enjoy

>>744601773
Cont

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kU6Ef70mCKg

>>744598860
I've got one

>Playing D&D Fallout theme
>Be fucking nerd
Noshit.mkv
>Party including myself and 8 friends spend hours setting up extremely detailed characters & stories
>Everyone agrees to start off getting money by guarding caravans, we even steal from them
>Random perception roll, I see a pack of wild dogs in the distance
>We obviously should just avoid them all together
>Think it will be funny to put the party in danger and pull us out like a hero

I put as many points as I could into unarmed

>Ran up to dogs as all my friends told me to stay the fuck back
>Get the jump of the pack of dogs
Fuckyeah.jpg
>Roll for damage
>Critical failure
>I end up overcompensating my punch and snap my leg in half
>Rest of my party came over to help
>They spent one turn moving. Since the dogs were already alerted my party lots about a quarter of their health before they even got to attack
>My party's turn
>One drags me away as the rest try to heal and attack the dogs, but more seemingly came out of nowhere
Several turns passed

MFW I ruined several hours of set up for 8 other people in only 20 minutes

It was all worth it

>>744601773
You have my interest

>>744604152
Forgot to specify this in the end:
Everyone died because I was an idiot

>>744598860
Why did Irma make you cancel D&D? A D&D game sounds like a great way to stay indoors and pass the time while you wait for the storm to end, and no worries when you lose electricity. Seems totally comfy.

>>744604854
I think OP was saying nobody can get to the location