Trying to lull myself asleep with the sweet sweet company of

Got any good beasti pron?

>>744264694
What do you use to wake yourself up in the morning? I mean this more emotionally. Because over the last 3 days, I've slept far more than I've been awake because there's nothing to really get out of bed for.

>>744264752
I dont. Sorry bro

>>744264835
Man i know that feeling. Ive battled depression most of my life. For me i just take it day by day...i too have days where i can sleep for like 10 hours.

I feel like its shitty and weak to admit but really its my bf that keeps me going amd giving me a reason to wake up...many normal people think thats not a good reason and i should just do it for myself self blah blah blah but in reality its just him...i start to think "if i never woke up he would be really sad" and i never want to make him sad. I know my absence would hurt him and i cant do that to him.
So i wake up every morning next to him as long as hes happy i can make it through the day

>>744265212
Damn. I really wasn't expecting a heartfelt response. Was honestly not ready for that at all.

I've dealt with the feeling of depression since late middle/early highschool. Back then I just assumed "it's just teenage hormones! It'll balance itself out!" and then I graduated and went to college and the feelings persisted. And then my SO of the time broke up with me, because I was depressed, which furthered the depression and I totally failed out of college. My parents told me I had until the end of that year to get a job, or live on the streets.
At that time, I had decided I would kill myself (in detail, knew what I was going to do) on 01/01/2016 if I were to get kicked out. I happened to get a job 12/15/2015. I feel like I've just been floating around since then. Hardly even a real person, just someone who works and sleeps.
I hardly remember my breaks and days off, hardly recall the many hours I've spent after work doing things. I know I've spent tons of time doing other things, but shit. It feels like work and sleep. it's mind numbing.

>>744265718
I tend to answer everything as honest as possible. I dont have the energy to troll around.

But yea youre sounding a lot like me. At the youngest i could remember i had no drive for hardly anything really. My report cards were always marked as "NM" for "no mark" because i couldnt even make an effort to try and fail. It all just felt so meaningless and its fucked up that an Elementary kid would even feel that way...it never went away.
I didnt even get my first job till i was 24 and im 27 now. Ive been more antisocial too so im losing so many friends. It sadly seems like my depression is getting deeper....thoughts of suicide are daily. Sometimes i get panic attacks being overcome by so many thoughts amd its literally just my bf thats their by my side and knows it all and doesnt leave me. Ive embraced my depression and allow it to have its days but then some days i really try to fight it for my bfs sake.
Just gotta find something to make you wanna live...be it a family member or evem a pet...theres no such thing as a "stupid" reason