YLYL extreme
No grinning
>>742118347
This thread isnt very funny.
>>742119021
she fucked a random man from pakistan?
the fuck is wrong with this dumb whore
I have some stuff that should at least make you grin
>>742118347
Sorry im late.
>>742118687
Fuck you, Japan! Fuck you!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jim8ZSBhxFw
>>742118687
>>742119882
dude totally lost
>>742118687
My mother is dead... what do now faggot?
>>742119644
Fucked WITH, not fucked
Learn to fucking read you goddamn mongoloid
>>742119937
Don't know how this is the one that got me. Felt nothing over the others.
>>742119612
dont know why this got me...
>>742119644
You are a special kind of retarded faggot, aren't you?
Fuck here means play/mess/tease....not intercourse.
>>742120615
>>742120818
No age of consent in Pakistan.
>>742118687
rip
>>742121046
>thats okay I'll still keep drinking that garbage
>>742118687
>>742119834
Damn I lost
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BNWXilOSwPQ
>>742121341
sanics arms are BLUE
>>742121480
Lost
>>742118687
Fag
>>742118687
>>742119882
Started to break on the bat, lost it at the mod
>>742118687
>>742119612
Fuckin perfect man.
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
Walk right in, it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
Now it all started two Thanksgivings ago, was on - two years ago on
Thanksgiving, when my friend and I went up to visit Alice at the
restaurant, but Alice doesn't live in the restaurant, she lives in the
church nearby the restaurant, in the bell-tower, with her husband Ray and
Fasha the dog. And livin' in the bell tower like that, they got a lot of
room downstairs where the pews used to be in. Havin' all that room,
seein' as how they took out all the pews, they decided that they didn't
have to take out their garbage for a long time.
We got up there, we found all the garbage in there, and we decided it'd be
a friendly gesture for us to take the garbage down to the city dump. So
we took the half a ton of garbage, put it in the back of a red VW
microbus, took shovels and rakes and implements of destruction and headed on toward the city dump.
Well we got there and there was a big sign and a chain across across the
dump saying, "Closed on Thanksgiving." And we had never heard of a dump
closed on Thanksgiving before, and with tears in our eyes we drove off
into the sunset looking for another place to put the garbage.
We didn't find one. Until we came to a side road, and off the side of the
side road there was another fifteen foot cliff and at the bottom of the
cliff there was another pile of garbage. And we decided that one big pile
is better than two little piles, and rather than bring that one up we
decided to throw ours down.
That's what we did, and drove back to the church, had a Thanksgiving
dinner that couldn't be beat, went to sleep and didn't get up until the
next morning, when we got a phone call from officer Obie. He said, "Kid,
we found your name on an envelope at the bottom of a half a ton of
garbage, and just wanted to know if you had any information about it." And
I said, "Yes, sir, Officer Obie, I cannot tell a lie, I put that envelope
under that garbage."
After speaking to Obie for about forty-five minutes on the telephone we
finally arrived at the truth of the matter and said that we had to go down
and pick up the garbage, and also had to go down and speak to him at the
police officer's station. So we got in the red VW microbus with the
shovels and rakes and implements of destruction and headed on toward the
police officer's station.
Now friends, there was only one or two things that Obie coulda done at
the police station, and the first was he could have given us a medal for
being so brave and honest on the telephone, which wasn't very likely, and
we didn't expect it, and the other thing was he could have bawled us out
and told us never to be see driving garbage around the vicinity again,
which is what we expected, but when we got to the police officer's station
there was a third possibility that we hadn't even counted upon, and we was
both immediately arrested. Handcuffed. And I said "Obie, I don't think I
can pick up the garbage with these handcuffs on." He said, "Shut up, kid. Get in the back of the patrol car."
And that's what we did, sat in the back of the patrol car and drove to the
quote Scene of the Crime unquote. I want tell you about the town of
Stockbridge, Massachusets, where this happened here, they got three stop
signs, two police officers, and one police car, but when we got to the
Scene of the Crime there was five police officers and three police cars,
being the biggest crime of the last fifty years, and everybody wanted to
get in the newspaper story about it. And they was using up all kinds of
cop equipment that they had hanging around the police officer's station.
They was taking plaster tire tracks, foot prints, dog smelling prints, and
they took twenty seven eight-by-ten color glossy photographs with circles
and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining what each
one was to be used as evidence against us. Took pictures of the approach,
the getaway, the northwest corner, the southwest corner, and that's not to
mention the aerial photography.
>>742119834
gold
>>742119612
Goddamnit
Lost
>>742119612
A fellow polack i see
These YLYL threads have been going to shit lately, go choke on a cock OP and the rest of you faggots who find any of this funny
After the ordeal, we went back to the jail. Obie said he was gonna put us in
A cell.
He said: "Kid, I'm gonna put you in a cell. I want your wallet and your
Belt."
I said, "Obie, I can understand your wantin' my wallet, so I don't have any
Money to spend in the cell, but what do you want my belt for?" and he said,
"Kid, we don't want any hangin's." I said, "Obie, did you think I was gonna
Hang myself for litterin'?"
Obie said he was makin' sure, and, friends, Obie was, 'cause he took out the
Toilet seat so I couldn't hit myself over the head and drown, and he took
Out the toilet paper so I couldn't bend the bars, roll the toilet paper out
The window, slide down the roll and have an escape. Obie was makin' sure.
It was about four or five hours later that Alice--(remember Alice? There's a
Song about Alice.)--Alice came by and, with a few nasty words to Obie on the
Side, bailed us out of jail, and we went back to the church, had another
Thanksgiving dinner that couldn't be beat, and didn't get up until the next
Morning, when we all had to go to court. We walked in, sat down, Obie came
In with the twenty-seven 8 x 10 colored glossy pictures with the circles and
Arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one, sat down.
Man came in, said, "All rise!" We all stood up, and Obie stood up with the
Twenty-seven 8 x 10 colored glossy pictures, and the judge walked in, sat
Down, with a seein' eye dog and he sat down. We sat down.
Obie looked at the seein' eye dog . . . then at the twenty-seven 8 x 10
Colored glossy pictures with the circles and arrows and a paragraph on the
Back of each one . . . and looked at the seein' eye dog . . . and then at
The twenty-seven 8 x 10 colored glossy pictures with the circles and arrows
And a paragraph on the back of each on and began to cry.
Because Obie came to the realization that it was a typical case of American
Blind justice, and there wasn't nothin' he could do about it, and the judge
Wasn't gonna look at the twenty-seven 8 by 10 colored glossy pictures with
The circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explainin'
What each one was, to be used as evidence against us.
And we was fined fifty dollars and had to pick up the garbage... in the
Snow.
But that's not what I'm here to tell you about.
I'm here to talk about the draft.
They got a buildin' down in New York City called Whitehall Street, where you
Walk in, you get injected, inspected, detected, infected, neglected and
Selected!
I went down and got my physical examination one day, and I walked in, sat
Down (got good and drunk the night before, so I looked and felt my best when
I went in that morning, 'cause I wanted to look like the All-American Kid
From New York City. I wanted to feel like . . . I wanted to be the
All-American Kid from New York), and I walked in, sat down, I was hung down,
Brung down, hung up and all kinds of mean, nasty, ugly things.
>>742122868
father rapers?
And I walked in, I sat down, they gave me a piece of paper that said: "Kid,
See the psychiatrist in room 604."
I went up there, I said, "Shrink, I want to kill. I want to kill! I want to see
Blood and gore and guts and veins in my teeth! Eat dead, burnt bodies! I
Mean: Kill. Kill!"
And I started jumpin' up and down, yellin' "KILL! KILL!" and he started
Jumpin' up and down with me, and we was both jumpin' up and down, yellin',
"KILL! KILL! KILL! KILL!" and the sergeant came over, pinned a medal on me,
Sent me down the hall, said "You're our boy". Didn't feel too good about it.
Proceeded down the hall, gettin' more injections, inspections, detections,
Neglections, and all kinds of stuff that they was doin' to me at the thing
There, and I was there for two hours... three hours... four hours... I was
There for a long time goin' through all kinds of mean, nasty, ugly things,
And I was just havin' a tough time there, and they was inspectin',
Injectin', every single part of me, and they was leavin' no part untouched!
Proceeded through, and I finally came to see the very last man. I walked in,
Sat down, after a whole big thing there. I walked up, and I said, "What do
You want?" He said, "Kid, we only got one question: Have you ever been
Arrested?"
And I proceeded to tell him the story of Alice's Restaurant Massacree with
Full orchestration and five-part harmony and stuff like that, and other
Phenomenon.
He stopped me right there and said, "Kid, have you ever been to court?" And
I proceeded to tell him the story of the twenty-seven 8 x 10 colored glossy
Pictures with the circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one
. . .
He stopped me right there and said, "Kid, I want you to go over and sit down
On that bench that says 'Group W'."
And I walked over to the bench there, and there's... Group W is where they
Put you if you may not be moral enough to join the army after committin'
Your special crime.
>>742118687
FUCK YOU
There was all kinds of mean, nasty, ugly-lookin' people on the bench there .
. . there was mother-rapers . . . father-stabbers . . . father-rapers!
FATHER-RAPERS sittin' right there on the bench next to me! And they was mean
And nasty and ugly and horrible and crime fightin' guys were sittin' there
On the bench, and the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one . . . the meanest
Father-raper of them all . . . was comin' over to me, and he was mean and
Ugly and nasty and horrible and all kinds of things, and he sat down next to
Me. He said, "Kid, what'd you get?"
I said, "I didn't get nothin'. I had to pay fifty dollars and pick up the
Garbage."
He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?" and I said, "Litterin'"' . . . .
And they all moved away from me on the bench there, with the hairy eyeball
And all kinds of mean, nasty things, till I said, "And creatin' a nuisance .
. . " And they all came back, shook my hand, and we had a great time on the
Bench talkin' about crime, mother-stabbin', father-rapin', . . . all kinds
Of groovy things that we was talkin' about on the bench, and everything was
Fine.
We was smokin' cigarettes and all kinds of things, until the sergeant came
Over, had some paper in his hand, held it up and said:
"KIDSTHISPIECEOFPAPERSGOTFOURTYSVENPAGESTHIRTYSEVENSENTENCESFIFTYEIGHTWORDSWEWANTTOKNOWTHEDETAILSOFTHECRIMETHETIMEOFTHECRIMEANDANYOTHERKINDOFTHINGYOUGOTTOSAYPERTAININGTOANDABOUTTHECRIMEWEWANTTOKNOWTHEARRESTINGOFFICERSNAMEANDANYOTHERTHINGYOUGOTTOSAY
. . ."
And he talked for forty-five minutes and nobody understood a word that he
Said.
But we had fun fillin' out the forms and playin' with the pencils on the
Bench there.
I filled out the Massacree with the four-part harmony. Wrote it down there
Just like it was and everything was fine. And I put down my pencil, and I
Turned over the piece of paper, and there . . . on the other side . . . in
The middle of the other side . . . away from everything else on the other
Side . . . in parentheses . . . capital letters . . . quotated . . . read
The following words: "Kid, have you rehabilitated yourself?"
I went over to the sergeant. Said, "Sergeant, you got a lot of god-damned
Gall to ask me if I've rehabilitated myself! I mean . . . I mean . . . I
Mean that you send . . . I'm sittin' here on the bench . . . I mean I'm
Sittin' here on the Group W bench, 'cause you want to know if I'm moral
Enough to join the army, burn women, kids, houses and villages after bein' a
Litterbug."
He looked at me and said, "Kid, we don't like your kind! We're gonna send
Your fingerprints off to Washington"!
>>742119161
I have yet to experience that.
And, friends, somewhere in Washington, enshrined in some little folder, is a
Study in black and white of my fingerprints.
And the only reason I'm singin' you the song now is 'cause you may know
Somebody in a similar situation.
Or you may be in a similar situation, and if you're in a situation like
That, there's only one thing you can do:
Walk into the shrink wherever you are, just walk in, say, "Shrink, . . . you
Can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant", and walk out.
You know, if one person, just one person, does it, they may think he's
Really sick and they won't take him.
And if two people do it, in harmony, they may think they're both faggots and
They won't take either of them.
And if three people do it! Can you imagine three people walkin' in, singin'
A bar of "Alice's Restaurant" and walkin' out? They may think it's an
Organization!
And can you imagine fifty people a day? I said FIFTY people a day . . .
Walkin' in, singin' a bar of "Alice's Restaurant" and walkin' out? Friends,
They may think it's a MOVEMENT, and that's what it is: THE ALICE'S
RESTAURANT ANTI-MASSACREE MOVEMENT! . . . and all you gotta do to join is to
Sing it the next time it comes around on the guitar.
With feelin'.
>>742121768
Bamboozled again!
>>742118687
May I call you Porkenkilo?
>>742119612
>>742201111
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
Walk right in, it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
>>742118687
dfhsghdgshj
>>742121480
Lost. Finally one i havent already seen somwhere
>>742119612
>>742121341
>>742122069
Lost
>>742118687
fmngkjl
>>742122069
Lost
>>742123728
kek
Looking for that (Facebook?) post of the women looking for guys to fix her wheel but the lug nuts were stripped as fuck.
>>742123728
lost at last one xD
>>742122069
If I ever turned into a mafia Lord I would do something like this to my enemies but without killing them, I would let them live but without limbs, eyes, face, no dick, no tongue.
>>742124155
and no gf
>>742118687
>>742121341
ZO WORLDO !!!
MUDAMEDAMEDAMEDAMEDAMEDAMEDAME....
>>742124219
Give them a gf that's torture enough
>>742119259
/thread
test
>>742118472
Lost
>>742119161
whats wrong with pressing a spacebar?????
>>742120615
That's the gayest and lamest thing I've ever seen.
>>742118687
cunt
>>742125108
It's a nigger. What did you expect?
>>742124884
lost it
>>742125108
Then you haven't seen me I guess.
>>742119612
Goddamn it, you brilliant whoreson
>>742125066
Lost
>>742118687
Fag!
>>742123728
>that last one
of fuck
This is severely underrated.
Here is a story, its all i have.
>>742119612
>1111
checked
>>742125154
I can actually relate with that guy.
Whenever i get the chance, i glide like superman.
>>742121323
ALMOST GOT ME.
>>742120138
HAHAHAHA
>>742126071
if you actually laughed at this,i got news for u
>>742125925
I'm drunk and I hope that you just posted that by mistake or that you're a 12 years old girl or a bait. Similar lol.
>>742125925
I taught my dog to do the same thing.
You cuck
>>742126071
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
YOU ORIGINAL HILARIOUS GUY
I BET YOURE GREAT AT PARTIES
YOU ARE SO ORIGINAL
>>742119834
I honestly don't understand this one
>>742123155
THIS PIC ALMOST GOT ME.
>>742118687
AHHAHA good one amate
>>742119834
i dont get it
>>742122033
DEEP. BREATHS.
>>742118687
I hope a lesbian beats you to death
>>742119882
I held out and then just fucking lost it at the end. Gets me every time on hard mode
>>742118454
Lost
>>742118687
Nigger
>>742126307
>>742126353
>>742126229
You two replied so fast, and you're so interested in comparing your sense of humor to mine. Are you interested?
I'd fuck both you hard.
>>742124884
>filename
>>742126307
edgy
>>742121847
consider me triggered, i remember being around 8 years old and selling my ps2 and about 20 game and got 30 dollars for it (i'd spent around 400 of my allowance i'd saved) went out of there crying, went in a week later and saw my games marked up 70 percent. fuck gamestop.
>>742118472
fuck off with the insta lose
>>742118687
sorry
>>742118687
understood
>>742120092
walder fray?
>>742126687
wat? you think this >>742125925 shit is funny? Go fuck yourself sideways!
>>742118687
>>742126875
>>742118687
ewasdas
>>742124914
You're gay and nobody likes you
>>742124884
i lost
>>742121461
Anyone have shadmans original picture that this uses
>>742126875
No I think using that video for make someone laugh is edgy, the gif is shit
>>742123728
So close...
>>742126361
You're not alone anon.
>>742120379
FUCK OFF I'M PISSED
>>742118547
>shadbase
>>742126993
>>742127106
Ah okay. I got most of my webms from rekt threads and I just didn't post the tragic gory ones. As i already Stated. I'm drunk. Hence my grammar.
>>742118687
>>742119259
>>742119882
>>742120230
>>742120615
>>742125925
Hey I lost to these
>>742118687
Fuck my tits dad
>>742125309
YOU FUCKING DUMBASS
>>742127334
>dishwasher in the back
>>742127374
whatever kid
>>742125154
Look at the cart. This isn't in America. They have them tiny carts in this guy's country.
>>742125434
Oh god no
>>742127411
Michael Myers?
>>742125111
Lost
>>742119612
God that's fucking perfect
>>742127538
>>742118687
epic
>>742118687
FUUUUUCCCCKKKK you
>>742127265
Fucking kek
>>742118347
>>742119161
I have literally never seen a black person winning an argument, nigger.
>>742119882
So fuckind close
>>742118687
Cunt
>>742118472
LOST.
>>742127538
Yeah!Whatever is the only word floating around in my mind right now.
>>742122069
story? poor guy, how the fuck do you survive with no hands and cut off face, especially after losing so much blood, probably gave him drugs, hope he didn't feel it much
>>742119834
Fucking golden
>>742122069
The one with should is better. You can hear hiss gurgling scream.
>>742120164
Thank Mr. Skeltal and gib good calciums
>>742122033
fucking lost
>>742126361
>>742126461
>>742127246
I think it's cuz of file name? Im not 100%sure tbh
>>742128088
*sound
>>742120164
Doot
>>742128088
OoOOoOOoOO the edge
>>742121480
lost hard
>>742123155
This is me.
>>742128285
>>742127351
Lost again
>>742127777
Checked
>>742120565
Awww hi puppy
>>742126361
I think it's related to the Brazzers parody.
>>742122974
fvdf
>>742123728
Son of a bitch. I almost made it too.
>>742124884
lost hard
Don't give me shit for this.
>>742126979
>>742121461
>>742119834
lost, nice work
>>742122974
you're a gay homosexual queer cocksucking faggot
Check them
>>742127777
Quads
gggg
>>742127477
>""""dishwasher""""
>>742128959
>James "Half hebrew, full throttle" Fields
Lost (my t)it.
>>742127922
You can survive for a while actually. He probably deserved it.
>>742120026
Lost at comment NOT highlighted
>i like buttholes
>and cannolis
Lmao
>>742123155
>>742127777
fucken lucky 7 quads
>>742120395
lost
>>742128895
thats not how either chess nor chekers is played
An easy one.
>>742129541
sometimes they don't which is why I asked for story, that shits brutal man
>>742128517
L O S T
Last one. Captcha is fucking with me. Captcha so sexy.
>>742120972
kek i got pic related
>>742119021
Open bobs and vegana
>>742129268
Lmfao i lost, dudes quick on his feet LOL
>>742120067
This guy always wins for autism
>>742122033
Fuck lost hard
>>742128901
pls explain
oof
>>742130617
scho mi yur bobs and vegana I pay moni
>>742126361
It's Baneposting
>>742122974
fuck
>>742130871
IIt's not actually funny. People died.
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2017-06-26/uss-fitzgerald-stayed-collision-course-despite-warnings-report/8653696
>>742120972
Got this
>>742131051
Yeah, now it's hilarious.
>>742123155
Frick
>>742130158
But it is how checkers is played
>>742118687
niceu niceu
>>742118687
Nigger
>>742119612
God damn
>>742118687
rrrrrrrrrrrrr
>>742131264
>>742131350
>>742131376
>>742131465
>>742131473
>>742131531
post something. I've only crap left.
>>742118687
Dbs
>>742128517
Fucking lost it
Now comes the old crap.
>>742131948
Oh god it's so bad.
Sexy captcha is going too hard on me. I can not take it anymore. cya later alligator.
>>742127664
>>742126361
https://youtu.be/VRCM0jWEQjQ