Just share your secrets, this is a safe place.

File: 17490116-What-did-I-do-Confused-blonde-girl--Stock-Photo.jpg (57KB, 1300x865px) Image search: [Google]

57KB, 1300x865px

>>741889028
When we were drunk my friend told me that he loves me more than he loves his girlfriend.

File: 20170812_080702.jpg (2MB, 2592x1944px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 2592x1944px

Im ugly

>>741889028
i'm gay

File: 1498417278812.png (7KB, 429x410px) Image search: [Google]

7KB, 429x410px

I pee in bottles because I dont want to leave my room

>>741889526
I do the same

>>741889526
who doesnt??

File: 1498160407817.jpg (47KB, 854x539px) Image search: [Google]

47KB, 854x539px

>>741889591
>>741889633
Show your piss bottles /b/ros

I've fogotten what good sex is like, my girl dosent cum tried everything. But I love her too much to leave, I'm sexualy bored and horny all the time.

>>741889028
I post on 4chan.

>>741889694
dont have any right now, i get rid of them on trashday, which was yesterday.

>>741889333
does that mean he's gay or does that mean he doesn't love his girlfriend all that much?

File: 1498417408740.jpg (4KB, 159x125px) Image search: [Google]

4KB, 159x125px

>>741889726
Love isnt real

Spend your time pumping for fun
not for some made up bullshit

>>741889818
I think it's both.

File: 1501701010138.jpg (56KB, 452x605px) Image search: [Google]

56KB, 452x605px

>>741889793

>>741889726
yeah, the novelty of putting you dick in a vagina wears off quickly, it's not just u

>>741889028
i had sex with a submissive girl in a garage during relationship. Its the kind of garage that is connected to the neighbours and only a "fence" is between

File: tenor (1).gif (422KB, 288x200px) Image search: [Google]

422KB, 288x200px

>>741889333
>>741889633
>>741889777
>>741889900
Holy shit checkd

>>741889526
ive done this before. can't anymore bc gf

>>741890028
>>741889988
its habbeninggz!!

>>741889526
Post pics

>>741889726
eat her out? bdsm? test some kinks?

Back in my kindergarden time, i told a friend as a joke that im going to shit in the yard. unfortunately, i did it. I still dont know why.

>>741889028
i fucked my best friend with my girlfriend secretly watching

I shower in the shower, push the shit down the hole with my toes or hands.

>>741889971
This hit home bro

>>741890304
Basically you waffle stomp.

When I was 10 I let 6 years old friend touch my penis, both males. I was weird kid

i was molested by a 9 year old kid

im a guy

>>741890452
>>741890569
hmm do you guys know each other maybe?

I want to die but I am to worried about the consequences of killing my for my family but I'd love it if someone pushed me in front of a train or I got some illness that would kill me. #pleaseGiveMeCancerAllah

File: IMG_20170812_225907.jpg (337KB, 2048x1152px) Image search: [Google]

337KB, 2048x1152px

>>741890082
I just started this carton 20 mins ago (still warm)
Red bull cans are full

this one time at band camp i accidentally a 10yo flute girl with my trombone

>>741890737
Why do you want to die, Anon-kun?

>>741889028
I jerk off to tranny porn

I'm a black dude and wasn't into fucking white women until this cuck thing took off.


Now I cant stop...

You guys wont believe this but hey what do i care. This moment changed my life. Posted this cpl days ago, wanna share again

2003 be 23
Having lunch break on a park bench downtown. Real nice summer day, people everywhere. Wasn't paying attention when the person sitting next to me left, but noticed they had left a sports bag under the bench. I was going to leave it well alone thinking it probably had gross sweaty gym gear in there. But something kept telling me to check it out. I pretended it was mine, leaned down and unzipped it a little.
> See some $20s and $50s.
Instantly put food down pick up bag fuck off as quickly but calmly as I can. Didn't even think about being a good citizen, just thought 'fuck there's probably a grand there, I'm taking it, finders keepers.'
Walked a block opened the bag a little more and realised it was full of money. Can't go back to work with this

Freak out, sweating wondered if someone is following me. Hail a cab, go a few blocks, got out, hail another then went straight home. Sitting in the back I looked further in, bags of dope and just bundles of cash. Biggest rush of my life
Get home call boss say I had vomited. Won't be back tomorrow either. Tipped the money onto bed started counting. When i get to $10k and barely made a dent in the pile knew i had scored fucking big.
> Final tally $38,090.
Get rid of drugs. Hid money under the house. Didnt even tell my wife. Thought it safer that way. Slowly spent it over the next decade on odd things, groceries, dinner, pizzas, movies, lottery tickets, scratch card that kind of thing.

My heart still pounds when I think about that moment. And fuck it was amazing counting all that money on my bed, I just kept laughing and punching the air like Tom Cruise or some shit.
Still think about my good luck, feel sorry for the guy who would've gotten dealt to real hard for losing that bag. But hey, that was his problem

Tldr: keep your eyes open. You never know what good fortune might come your way

>>741889028
I used to have a female roommate a couple years back. When she would piss me off I'd shoot a load in her shampoo/body wash.

>>741889028
I really wanna know what's it like to torture and kill someone I don't like.

Just saw my niece for the first time in 8 years and honestly i would fuck her brains out.

File: waifu3.jpg (82KB, 960x852px) Image search: [Google]

82KB, 960x852px

I'd prefer Loli over real girls

I work on the railway doing tickets and I constantly let people off, if your 16 and look young then your 15 and are getting a child ticket.

Got a wrong zone ticket ? Who the fuck cares

Got a MOD pass ? Come right in buddy

Why do I do it ? Just to piss of my work colleague who is a jobs worth

you do realize that everything your ISP can store everything you post on 4chan?

>>741889028
I breathe Oxygen.

>>741893025
I challenge the ISP to come after me with their shitty legal team, full force and guns blazing

The only Time i feel anything good at all is when im stoned , besides that i either dont feel anythign at all or pure hatred towards the World in general.

>>741889398
Nah you're fucking fine no homo

>>741889028
I hate my wife for getting cancer . She refused to get it checked out now everything is fucked .

When I was 6 me and my male cousin used to kiss. I didn't know about that was considered being Gay at the time

>>741893647
Shit man. That's bad. Youre ok to be angry about this. People gotta pay attn to their bodies.

>>741892101
Did you spend all of it anon?

>>741892101
Someone Def died

>>741889526
Iv done this too. College level life bro>>741889028

File: 1498417336773.jpg (8KB, 206x250px) Image search: [Google]

8KB, 206x250px

>>741892101
Lucky motherfucker

>>741894338
>>741890788

>>741889333
I mean are you open to that kind of thing?

>>741893959
I did yeah. Just little purchases. I didn't want to do anything that aroused suspicion. Never told a soul, especially my wife. Well she was actually my gf back then.
She would've splurged on something, paid off credit cards, blabbed to someone.
Took a while to spend it. Might be hard to believe but it takes a long time to spend nearly $40k on little things. Just lived a second life no one knew about. We had our home budget, you know $100 a week on groceries, $30 on lunches. But I was having nice lunches almost every day some weeks spending $300 on food.

But was real nice always having cash available. Miss those days.

>>741894113
Yep, I think you're right. I try not to dwell on this. I spent the first month worrying that someone would track me down and take me out. Stupid dangerous thing to do, but in my case got away with it

>>741889526
I do the same thing college level shit

I really think I'm about to rape someone and kill her whole family if she manages to be a bitch to me one more time

when I was 6 I had sex with my 8 years old sister.
We saw sex scene in TV Show and we decided to try do the same.
Today we act like it has never happened

>>741889028
i crossdress

wearing a dress, pantyhose, heels, bra with D forms right now

i wish i could dress like this daily

>>741895424

greentext
did you successfully penetrate her?

>>741895580
>6 and 8
>green text plez
... you fucking pedo

>>741895793

welcome to 4chan

>>741895516
Do it and apply for a job at Google,

mines boring, i pretended to be a girl, seduced some freak on the Lineage 2 mmo and robbed his whole account which he trusted me after months of pretending. I had to force through his dick pics on Telegram messenger and listen to his bullshit for weeks. Lots of good loot though, shared it with my friends and sold a lot of stuff.

>>741895580
I don't think so. We also tried anal but she was too tight
But I remember that I was saying pulsation instead of orgasm

>>741894976
Yeah I think so.

>>741895912

lol, cute

>>741889726
Fuck her selfishly . It feels good. She might enjoy it too, but don't give a fuck about her needs.

File: download.jpg (3KB, 104x104px) Image search: [Google]

3KB, 104x104px

>>741890304
I shower in the shower too.

>>741889028
I'm a femanon. This afternoon I tried to parallel park and accidentally hit a bunch of people at a protest. I drove away and ditched my car, pinning it on some fat white guy.

I regularly have sex with my sister, been doing it for years

File: 4214141.jpg (103KB, 500x673px) Image search: [Google]

103KB, 500x673px

I'm 20 y.o. man, but sometimes i dream about being a girl. Girl which lives in XVII century, grows the flowers, doesn't care about technology and wears clothes like this on picture.

>>741896438
>pinning it on some fat white guy

How does ditching your car = it's a white guy's fault?

File: Screen Shot 2017-06-22 at 10.29.06 AM.png (8KB, 45x43px) Image search: [Google]

8KB, 45x43px

>>741896405
Me too!

>>741889028
I have a thing for my sisters best friend and I think she's got a thing for me

>>741896575
good luck having a shower in XVII century, i'm sure you will stink like hell

>>741895402
Maybe you should not be fucking retarded and just stay away from that person instead

>>741896691
I don't need shower. The nature is enough. Rain/Rivers/Sea and others :P

>>741890788
you have multiple open cans of piss on your desk!? hardcore next level sheeeeeeit

I have no idea who I am. I don't feel like an actual person. Everything feel surreal. I hope I wake up and this is all a dream or smth.

File: daily reminder.jpg (170KB, 792x847px) Image search: [Google]

170KB, 792x847px

I fell hopelessly in love with this girl that ghosted me. I was almost over it, then I relapsed when I saw her out in town... with another dude.

IDK why this happened. It makes no sense, had one night with this girl that now wants nothing to do with me and ghosted and yet here I am moping around listening to songs about unrequited love.

>tfw its been two months

I secretly manipulate my girlfriends life to make it shitty so that she continues to cut herself because selfharm turns me on.

>>741892244
She probably ended up with amazing skin and hair from all the extra amino acids and nutrients.

Control my pinay soon to be wife with guilt trips to the point she literally is my sex slave and fuck her in all three holes

File: 1467599445234.jpg (84KB, 425x441px) Image search: [Google]

84KB, 425x441px

I'm fascinating with mom-son porn & incest stories, but have never found my real mom sexy or wanted to have sex with her. Weird, I know.

>>741889398
You're not, quit trying to fish for compliments or gouge out your eyes because obviously they're defective.

File: despair-257x300.jpg (19KB, 257x300px) Image search: [Google]

19KB, 257x300px

I'm developing a plan to rip off drug dealers. I know where several drop points are , but so far haven't got a fail safe plan to pull it off without getting caught......soon!

>>741889028
i've been molested when 10 yo, then rejected by girls in puberty, have fetish for peeing myself, now i can't find a girl and feel like i'll be 4ever alone

Once in a while my gf lets her nieces, 9 & 11yo, watch us having sex. Usually at night in the living room with us on one couch and them on the other next to ours.

I have a deal with my friend's girlfriend. Almost always when he is in job I go to her house and I let her piss on my body. She is sadist, I'm masochist. My friend doesn't know about it.

Ate all my wife's M&M's and blamed on the kids.
She grounded them and took their ipads away....I don't even care.

I'm hacking one of my best friends phone to see the shit he says about me and maybe leak his nudes. (His girlfriend is a very persuading slut)

File: 1498417305372.jpg (6KB, 184x184px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 184x184px

>>741897018
Yea duuuude

>friend of mine breeds rats and mice as food for owls and snakes
>ask friend if they would be safe for human consumption
"Sure Anon, would you like to try it?"
>he said it in joking manner
>immediately ask how much he's willing to pay me to eat one pinkie (a newborn rat)
"I'll give you 10€"
>i accept
>he starts unfreezing the pinkie in hot water
>as a sign of good faith he gave me a slice of lemon to go with it
>pick this rat with no fur, the size of thumb
>take a bite
>instantly i was hooked
>but i couldn't show it
>make a disgusted face as i chow down the bowls and bones of this little mammal
>it felt good, made me feel like an animal
>get my bet money but what i really wanted was more pinkies
>friend also sold snakes
>figure that if i buy a snake it would be okay to buy more pinkies
>buy a snake to get more pinkies
To this day i still indulge in this animalistic pleasure and each time i feed my reptile pet i partake in this ritual

>>741889028
I've been fucking my fiancee's best friend by 1 year now.
I've been with my fiancee by 7 years now, and she has known her friend by 12,they know each other since grade school.
I don't even like her friend, we are just attracted to each other.

File: 1498417085885.jpg (46KB, 312x312px) Image search: [Google]

46KB, 312x312px

>>741898975
I cant stop laughing lmfaooooo

I have a snake should i try?

>>741898975
neat

Boss wants to give me a company phone, but the IT guy told me they have tracking software on them, so I keep using my personal phone and add roll the monthly fees into my paid mileage.

I once knew this fucking dipshit kid that always slept during classes and liked to cheat off of other people. He lived in the same neighborhood so I went out at around 4 AM and sliced the tires on his moms car up with a bayonet. He got blamed for it the next day and I could hear the screaming from his dad beating his ass two blocks away. His parents divorced afterward and his dad got custody, and they moved to California.

i like to rub my asshole with one finger and smelling it while i close my eyes and imagine it's a hot fat ass ebony's butthole while i jerk off with balsam vaseline.

>>741898975
You should also eat your snake. I got hooked on snakes when I lived in Indonesia. Cobras are bony and have very little flesh, so stay away from them. Constrictors though, like pythons and anacondas are fucking delicious. Full of meat, so much meat.

I'm an OK looking guy who haven't had sex in 9 years, due to i having a tiny penis (last girl i was with just laughed at me and left)
I usually just make out with chicks, but whenever things get "hot" i just make up an excuse and leave.

File: 1498416911846.jpg (32KB, 740x852px) Image search: [Google]

32KB, 740x852px

>>741899502
Start eating there pussies instead of leaving

Have a small dick.4.5"...works fine though, because I have 3 kids. Still hate looking at it in the mirror.

Hey anons, It's nice to know there are as many degenerate people like me, sometimes more sometimes less :P

Played Dr. with my sister for years when we were kids...never had sex with her though and still regret it....

>>741889726
Same. Try being married 15 years ;(

Sup anons, 19yo fgt here.
I fuck sleeping girls. And i feel bad for it, cause it is rape.
Also i turn on younger girls age 13-16.
I am depressed most of my time, and i am to depressed go do stuff.
Fml

>>741890304
What the fuck

>>741890737
Allah dont forget about me. I loaded the shotgun but didnt an hero for some stupid reason...

1 in 3 Americans unironically believe "ghosts" exist

>>741899603
I'm afraid they'd think im playing with them or that i'm a faggot, they probably think so anyways tho.

>>741899713
Try having a 3.6 inches dick and being 6'2 feet tall, while being white (so i can't even play the "im asian" card)

>>741889028

Killed my younger sister when we were children. At least didn't say anybody that she had fell in a pothole or well. Never found her body, my parents got divorced and my entire childhood was shit.

When I was 14 I paid a 11 year old to show me her pussy

>>741899181
Yes you should, it's really empowering and suprisingly tasteful but i strongly advise against furred rats as it will taste awful and you just focus on the hair in your mouth

>>741898716
You cruel bastard

>>741890788
Madman. Who pisses in open containers???? U dump them or just throw a loose gallon of piss in the trash?

>>741900381
Story???????
How did she die?

File: 1498417064717.jpg (15KB, 480x354px) Image search: [Google]

15KB, 480x354px

>>741900394
What about all the shit still in them?

>>741889028
I catfish my daughter on kik, have guys tribute her pics, share her panties.

File: 1498417068333.png (76KB, 186x195px) Image search: [Google]

76KB, 186x195px

>>741900441
I dont throw them away...

>>741900387
how much, was it worth it? I have 4 sisters so growing up i got to see and touch pussy all the time for free.

>>741889028
I'm a straight guy that sucked my straight friends dick.

I accidentally raped my sister when we were younger.

>>741900772
kek

>>741900791
C'mon, you can tell us it wasn't an accident :^)

>>741900791
i did that a couple times. 1st time i tripped over the cat and fell right on top of her and my dick landed right in her vagina. we laughed about it for a long time.

>>741892817
U sick faggot.

>>741900885
What?

>>741892101
If thats true you without a doubt got the person killed that dropped the bag. Hope it was worth it...

>>741893025
Ahhhhhhhh fuck

I've been through the desert on a horse with no name

>>741893647
Shit anon. The test results just came in?

File: 1340308071509_967525.png (71KB, 420x294px) Image search: [Google]

71KB, 420x294px

>>741892817
lmao you virgin

>>741892101
i really hope this is true. i am going to walk away thinking it is, thanks i needed this
>strange amount

>>741901347
did it feel good to be out if the rain?

When i was 6 i had gay sex with my identical 7 year opd cousin under a bed and my parents found it and none of talk about it, like it dident exist

>>741889028
I piss in the bathroom sink every time I wash my dick after fapping
feels good man

>>741889028
9/11 WAS AN INSIDE JOB!! WAKE UP SHEEPLE!!

I gave a friend of mine a chewing gum with one of my pubes on in it. He chewed it, thanked me and never said a word about it

>>741889526
Shit thanks for reminding me to empty mine from last night, I hate trying to explain that its not a new flavor of powerade

i accidentally shot someone in the back
i dont think i love my gf anymore
and im in love with my best friend but i dont want to break up with her cause she'll probably kill herself so im trying to get her to break up with me
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

>>741895871
Ahahaha! Yes

>>741896575
i indentify as a toaster

>>741897533
i really do hope you change your ways

File: 1498416966576.jpg (7KB, 185x273px) Image search: [Google]

7KB, 185x273px

>>741901733
you wash your dick after you fap wut????

>>741901803
Yo, i dont know your gfs story but 60% of the time girls say they are goung to kill themselves its only to guilt you into staying in the relationship

>>741901757
Show

File: download.jpg (5KB, 276x183px) Image search: [Google]

5KB, 276x183px

>>741889028
Donald Trump is a lizard man. Those are my secrets.

>>741896531
What the fuck anon...

I don't really want to be the president of USA, I just thought it would be good for my business. But it's not! Sad!

>>741900629
Thats why i eat newborns, they are still pure

>>741901897
yeah maybe, idk my best friend and gf are both in weird places
sometimes i wish i could control my dick instead of the other way around, i got a nice promising career and i waste too much time fucking around with either of them.

>>741901882
ofc doesn't everyone?
why would i want my weiner to be sticky and collect stray pubic hairs? plus i feel the urge to take a whiz after i cum, and a stream of warm water really helps
you should definitely try it

>>741900629
hopefully if its super new-born it wont have shit

File: 1502571121810.jpg (151KB, 960x636px) Image search: [Google]

151KB, 960x636px

>>741896620
U dipshit...

File: 1300044776986.jpg (17KB, 250x250px) Image search: [Google]

17KB, 250x250px

>>741902040
i'll make a thread one night of eating one <3

File: download.jpg (7KB, 144x236px) Image search: [Google]

7KB, 144x236px

>>741901733
lel, do you also fuck your pillow every night before you go to bed?

File: 1480141895585.jpg (130KB, 1440x1798px) Image search: [Google]

130KB, 1440x1798px

>>741897018
He likes to live dangerously

I got my ex fired from her job, but I didnt lie about anything, she stole money from the safe one night and she told me. Told the district manager, She got fired, she doesnt know it was me.

File: 1498424838866s.jpg (3KB, 125x120px) Image search: [Google]

3KB, 125x120px

>>741902061
I wanna now !!

I always just catch it with a tissue or a sock if im in public

>>741897533
Fucking sick bastard...

File: 1452895933499.jpg (238KB, 2015x2048px) Image search: [Google]

238KB, 2015x2048px

I wish that I had Jessie's girl.

>>741902175
what the fuck?? lol

>>741900381
:(

i have a fetish for loli sex education

>>741902148
lol no why would i wanna fuck my pillow?

Had sex with my friends gf. Didnt plan too, never would have done it. But she came onto me. Feel bad for doing it.

> Drinking with best bud at his place
> hes real drunk, I go easy because early start tomorrow
> 11pm his gf comes over, I think she's hot, there's always been something between but nothing doing, you dont fuck friends gfs
> we sit out by the pool in the dark and talk
> I feel like 3s a crowd, i go lie down on the outdoor lounger behind them to give them space
> they start getting it on
> he's too drunk to care I'm there but she knows what she's doing
> sitting on his lap kissing him while looking right at me, she's giving me a show
> I'm an idiot, put hand down pants and try to hide that im fapping myself
> she nods at me, shit she caught me
> I can't see anything but the back of his head and her face
> she gets up, takes pants off and sits on his lap again, starts moving up and down, oh shit they're fucking
> she just smiles at me the whole time
> I should probably go but the situations too weird, I'm happy to watch the show
> can't really see anything but still hot as fuck
> maybe 10 mins goes by
> she starts signalling at me
> points at me and then the house
> ????
> realize she wants me to go inside, not sure why or wtf is going on. Maybe she wants privacy
> suppose I should fuck off anyway walk in get my keys and wallet
> about to leave hear her voice
> she's in the lounge calling for me
> i walk in see her wearing only a shirt

Cont

>>741902047
If i were you i would leave them and go my own way, if you got a good career going then you shouldent be fucking with girls and focus more on yourself :/

>>741898207
Kek! U gonna get shot

File: shocked.png (75KB, 257x174px) Image search: [Google]

75KB, 257x174px

>>741902364

>>741902281
:^)

>>741900381
I have now lost all faith in humanity.

>>741902364
I bet you do faggot. Or are you just wanting attention?

>>741902111
And i'll be there to accompany you Anon-kun

>>741898366

Sick mutherfuckers

>>741902213
>or a sock if im in public
I admire your style
aren't you afraid someone might notice you're barefoot tho?

File: 1498416825602.jpg (338KB, 753x707px) Image search: [Google]

338KB, 753x707px

>>741902576
always carry a sock inbetween my ass crack ;)

I hate that im not kidding :(

p.s I usually leave the sock in a toilet at the end

>>741902382

> says she liked giving me a show, now she wants to give me a turn
> 'I've always wanted to do this with you, just one time only, never talk about it OK?
> oh shit, rly? I never knew
> 'anon he's passed out, let's make this quick'
> should've walked out but hot half naked woman in front of me, too tempting
> I'm kinda stalling, and she says stop wasting time, quick lets fuck before I change my mind
> she pulls me down, lies on the floor and opens her legs in front of me
> she has her hands all over her body, goes down to her pussy, gives me a great little show
> its worked, get my cock out
> screw her there and then in the lounge
> power fuck her, hard and slow, best fuck I've ever had
> stare in each other eyes and kiss the whole time
> so dangerous can get found at any moment
> get her legs up I get on my knees and just drill her
> I wont last long, tell her I'm gonna cum, where does she want it?
> inside me, I'm on the pill, stay inside me
> i make a bit too much noise, cant help it
> creampie her
> shit wtf have I done?
> she tells me to vamos
> its all good she will clean herself up, I just better go real quick
> walk out the front door putting my cock back into my pants
> get cum all over my hand

See her all the time still. Never talk about it again. Its never gonna happen again either. Those few minutes best sex I've ever had.

When I was 9 my mom and dad would go out dancing and leave me with a 16 year old neighbor girl named Sharon, my parents had HBO and Sharon liked to watch the adult shows at night and she would let me watch with her. One night real sex was on and there was a lot of tits and ass showing so I am sitting there with my little hardon pushing up under my Spider-Man pajamas.
Sharon must have seen because reached over and grabbed my dick and pulled it out thru the pee slit.
I was shocked, she gave it 2 strokes and I shot my very first orgasm all over her arm and hand. I was so embarrassed I ran off to bed and never told anybody until just now.

File: 1498416970058.jpg (4KB, 125x125px) Image search: [Google]

4KB, 125x125px

>>741902515
Cant wait rat bro

Was getting fucking tired of kids playing with my doorbell so i purposely left a loose wire in order to shock whoever used it.
A kid died and another one was harmed when he apparently tried to push the other kid away.
It was considered an accident.
No kid has ever played with my doorbell since.

>>741902507
umm no i don't
and what does not fucking a pillow has to do with wanting attention?
I did however fuck my playstation joypad once while playing street fighter alpha when I was a kid cuz it had vibration and I didn't know any better

I still fap to Chun Li occasionally tho

>>741902702
not sure whether to laugh or cringe hard
ofc if what you wrote is true

>>741902539
meh

>>741900303
anal if you can

dont let them see your little tiny embarrasing small micropenis

>>741889028
im pedo

File: 1501587592748.jpg (71KB, 500x395px) Image search: [Google]

71KB, 500x395px

>>741902975
its true....
Can make a thread some day about it if your active

>>741898940
LOL. Taking noses off of cartoons looks easy and funny af. Thanks for the inspiration

>>741903103
its ok im a pedo cuck. I jack off to other guys wanting to molest and fuck my daughters.

>>741900381
that's a big fucking pothole /b/ro.
maybe she is in Narnia or some shit

>>741902398
yeah i know you're pretty much right anon, why are girls so damn cute, god dammit!

File: ad_140540949.jpg (55KB, 667x1000px) Image search: [Google]

55KB, 667x1000px

>>741903207
No problemo /b/tard

File: VYniAUO.png (233KB, 422x323px) Image search: [Google]

233KB, 422x323px

>>741898975
Dude.... wat... just....

Mfw

>>741899181
Lieterally do not take the bate

>>741903171
b-b-but w-why do you need to shove a sock in your buttcrack? doesn't it fit, say, in your pocket? or do you just like it that way? as in heh-i'm-fucking-my-own-ass sort of deal?
or, you know, you could just buy some god damn pocket tissues

>>741890223
When I was in kindergarten, my first time using a urinal, I think I shit in it.

File: 1499805622414.jpg (12KB, 348x321px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 348x321px

>>741903474
pros
>warm sock
>collects ass sweat
>silences farts
>never gonna loose it cuz it dont move
>confuse the janitor with socks in the toilets

cons
>need to dip into pocket money for socks

>>741889028
I did gay shit with my brothers when we were too young to know any better, No guys do not turn me on, No i am not gay. This is my deepest darkest secret and it is pretty fucking shameful. Should i let this haunt me?

I like to fuck older women. Like, women older than 50. Not fatties though. But yeah, I would never date one or be seen in public being affectionate... but they're great in bed and are usually zero drama. Plus they know how to make a good meal. And they'll sometimes pay you, which is a huge plus.

File: 3fa9faf32a974ac95d954d7cf80a5697a0ddcadf_hq.jpg (23KB, 560x320px) Image search: [Google]

23KB, 560x320px

>>741903465
too late im curious

>>741889028
My rude bitch of a girlfriend laughed when I said I was mad that I was circumcised.

>>741899498
Easy to skin too ;)

I hear rattlesnakes good but illegal to eat

>>741899502
That really sucks bro. Not all women are cunts.

Not all the time at least

File: Jerry-Springer-politics.jpg (30KB, 600x399px) Image search: [Google]

30KB, 600x399px

>>741895402
Why don't you tell us about it.

>>741899713
Nah, just geow a dicky doo and dont look at yourself in the mirror like i do

>>741900772
Straight? Riiiiiight! Kekekekekeke

Admit it fag, you're a faggot & that's fine. What's not fine is pretending you're straight when in fact you enjoy ducks in your mouth.

So I get to my hotel room and I have an interview the next morning, immedietely start wanking its been 20 minutes and I still have not there yet im on anti depresants and for some reason it effects my orgasms. Decide to put a finger up my ass because I heard it makes you cum, fidnt work, finally cum after an hour. Have a shameful shower its now 9 at night. Go to the hotel bar and get beers in get really depressed so I swotch to scotch spend all my money. Go back to my room write 3 suicide notes amd talk to a suicide hot line for 3 hours. Decide to finally do it so I cut my wrist long way but not deep. Before I go over it again my nan text me at like 4:30 telling me she loves me so I dont kill myself and I go to sleep. This happened 3 weeks ago havent told a soul since

I know who drove the car.

>>741903986
I just said I was straight you illiterate moron. You're probably just a projecting faggot.

>>741903754
Don't let it haunt you if you didn't enjoy it.

File: 1501874354939.png (135KB, 500x522px) Image search: [Google]

135KB, 500x522px

>>741904017
stick in there please

>>741901213
who gives a fuck? anon didnt get the person killed. SOMEBODY would have taken the bag. The person who forgot their bag full of drugs and money got themselves killed. It was left there fair and square. Anon should feel no guilt about taking a FREE BAG OF 40K dollars.

>>741904151
Shit. Not brendan frasier. I love that guy. He has the same fake smile robin williams had

>>741904092
Faggot.

>>741903779
Circumcised cocks feel better than uncut cocks. Sucks for you but good for her.

I'm always nice and polite with everyone, but I actually don't like blacks

ive touched a friends peepee while he was sleeping
also i blew a dog

File: FB_IMG_1493151732547.jpg (47KB, 986x560px) Image search: [Google]

47KB, 986x560px

Wife told me that that if she can't fulfill my sexual needs that I can go to other women for it. She's said she's cool as long as she doesn't know them. Was getting ready for my first date this morning, wife is moody and pissed. Ask her what's wrong thinking that she is having second thoughts. She's mad that I might be late picking her up, asks that if we fuck that i send a video. I go on my date, wife goes shopping. Get back. Wife anoyed we didn't fuck. She also doesn't want me telling my friends about my "girlfriends"". I have another date set up in two weeks and a date with a different woman set up for next Friday. I think my wife is a cuckquean.

>>741904227
Go fuck yourself.

File: robin-williams-smile.jpg (39KB, 480x480px) Image search: [Google]

39KB, 480x480px

>>741904226
You mean this? :^)

>>741904178
Accept it wasnt his and how the fuck do u figure a bag drop wasnt about to get picked up.

U faggot fucking newfaggot i know a coke dealer and u are an idiot.

And so is 40k anon for pissing it away. Do you know how much money he could have made with that? Thats a down payment on a $200,000 house in the suburbs anon could have rented out for the rest of his short life.

File: 1470702003444.png (180KB, 346x373px) Image search: [Google]

180KB, 346x373px

>>741889028
I squat on the toilet when taking a shit

>>741903986
hey im straight and ive eaten duck plenty of time at my favorite thai restaurant. whats so gay about eating some fucking duck?

>>741904354
Dude...

I never even thought about a woman being a cuck.

That is fucking terrific

>>741904354
>I think my wife is a cuckquean
it' either that or she wants to overcome the guilt for fucking tyrone behind your back

>>741904436
Dammit... yes. I was hoping nobody remember this pic ;(

I tried to watch that show he was in where he was sarah michelle gellers dad and ran the advertising business.

I couldnt do it.

Got sad every time he smiled.

>>741902770
Doorbells are only 24 volts...not enough to even give a mild shock....Add this to the list of things that never happened.

I firmly believe the "CASH ME OUTSIDE" girl will go into porn asap, and then die suddenly, like most of the others.

>>741904436
It sucks because i feel like i can tell. Like your eyes cant lie and you're in pain.

Im always nercous about the people i love an heroing

I showered with a cute 9yo girl earlier today. Have done it quite a few other times as well

>>741904017
anti depressants dont do shit except make you worse. holy fuck. could be your diet, could be the city you live in, could be bad mental habits youve formed by entertaining negative thoughts and bullshit about yourself. Seriously go travel around, find what you like in life, and get off the drugs. Anti depressants take sad people and turn them into suicidal people. And if you think Im full of shit then I ask you this question...

whats the point of living if your dick doesnt work?

so get off the drugs and take the chance that your life might get better. because with a non-functioning dick your life is effectively over and you might as well kill yourself anyway. unless your schizophrenic or soemthing really serious like that you dont need meds you just need to stop being a goddamn beta pussy.

>>741901213
I hear you but I don't feel guilt. Not now anyway. If I had have taken the bag to the police it would have implicated me somehow and the dude still would have been killed

>>741901465
> strange amount
Well $38090 minus two cab fares and generous tips ;-)
Yeah. But looking at it i had no idea if it was $5k or $500k. A big pile of bills just looks like a big pile of bills. And takes a while to count.

>>741904178
This anon gets it. If I had a later lunch or sat elsewhere that guy still would have died. Is it my community service to walk through a busy downtown looking for a dealer that I wouldn't even recognize to hand his shit back to him?

If it wasn't me someone else would've taken the cash. And I wouldn't be surprized if this hasn't happened before. I think a spaced out dealer can easily make stupid mistakes.

>>741904594
Kek. I ate duck at a chinese place. Was meh at best

>>741903951
Tl;dr a half brit here in the Phil thinks she's much more higher because of her daddy's blood.

>>741904717
AHHHHHH shit. Theres always a catch.

Dont do it anon. Hire a pi instead and then fuck all the strange u want when u catch her

>>741904917
>>741904594
>>741903986
I eat some duck just yesterday, it is so good! It does not mean i am gay

>>741904463
Appreciate your input man. Never considered it could've been a drop. I just know nothing about that type of world.

And yeah the money could've gone to real good stuff. But I didn't know how to hide it. At best I bought some gold coins and jewelry which I said was left to me when an uncle died.

>>741904463
anyone who isnt a total retard doesnt have someone "leave the bag full of drugs and money in public to pick up later".

unless theyre watching it to immediately pick it up. what kind of retard just leaves this shit sitting around for x amount of time?

why not just bring the drug dealer his money securely? are you high, lying, or a fucking retard?

anyone dumb enough to say "yeah just leave it under a bench where theres a bunch of people around for a while, ill pick it up when i get around to it" is dumb as fuck.
In that case, the person dropping it could just keep it and claim they dropped it.

Youve probably never seen coke in your life you fucking junior high pussy.

>>741905020
why not fucking other chicks in the meantime as well?

>>741903754
The same happened to me man, it's the single largest thing I regret in life.

>>741904814
Shit. Sadly shes just a kid and already busted with weed. She'll start a recreational meth habbit and get knocked up with ganstas babies.

>>741904839
Anon at 9 i feel like thats fucked up even if its your kid...

Wtf is wrong with u

>>741893586
Edgy

>>741904017
;( fuck anon. We all love u buddy. Everyone here besides the log of shit andy sixx guy deserves to live.

Probably me to...

>>741905142
This debate and the bag of cash and drugs stroy probably needs a thread all on its own.

>>741896672
Go for it, anon, live your life and get laid.

>>741905484
ikr because her doing/seeing something she's done/seen 1000 times before is extremely traumatic. lol k

>>741904864
Fucking hell anon. Im not him but my dick is just for show and my meds make me super suicidal. But before i was on them i came real close to ending it.

I just dont know wtf to do.

>>741897191
Don't be a pussy, fucking approach her. You have every right to be furious at her

File: 1498417130889.jpg (55KB, 480x650px) Image search: [Google]

55KB, 480x650px

>>741904809
And get it everywhere?

If you want updated pics of that jug sure

not transferring containers you nigger

also why would i keep empty cans fggt

>>741896575

Laughed out loud. My god I love this website.

>>741904909
You dense mutherfucker IT WAS NOT YOURS YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE EVER EVEN LOOKED IN IT FAGGOT. OR AT LEAST SAID HEY ANON U FORGOT THIS

>>741898622
You two belong together

>>741897887i understand

>>741898207
Green text when done

>>741905138
Kek. Maybe my duck was just bland. Was a shithole place to eat.