Spill it out, /b/ will understand

>>739534620
I was a pretty normal child.

keep the thread alive while i type

when I was 13 I was caught masturbating, as punishment I was made to jerk off into a cup and drink it while dressed in my shitty clown costume with makeup from when I was 7

> cant eat flaky pies without getting crumbs on the floor
> dad throws all my food on the floor and tells me to pick it up

> been young teenager
> invite a friend around
> dad goes crazy and says he can smell cigarette smoke
> neither me nor my friend have ever touched a cigarette
> friend has to leave
> my computer power cable gets confiscated
> never have another friend around at my place until i leave home

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>be 6ish
>be chillin with dad on a boring night
>dad flipping through tv channels
>stumbles upon the Amityville Horror
>tells me its really fuckin scary
>try to get him to change it
>doesn't, just laughs at me cringing
>gets to the scene with the dolls eyes opening
>as soon as the eyes are on screen cover my face and try to run away
>dad chases me across the room and pries my hands off my face
>basically holds me towards tv so I cant not see it
>scene ends
>bit of releif
>dad lets go
>something else jarring happens immediately after
>dad tries to grab me again
>before he can 180 so im facing him
>push him with my 6yo fight or flight strength
>he back peddles over an end table
>falls back
>in doing so, manages to recover, then fall back again on a bicycle resting on the wall
>handlebars pierce his pants around the crotch
>inspects his nuts while in utter shock
>he busts out laughing
>I cry and hide til my mom gets home

My dad and I are close, but goddamn he loved to torture the shit outta me as a kid to get a laugh. Probs why I don't really emote correctly as an adult.

>>739535367
Who did this to you?

i dunno wtf happened in my childhood that causes this but now i cant sleep with a woman or even kiss or date them. Im outgoing and i have a normal job but if a woman tries to seduce me i just feel super anxious and sick. I'm ok being friends with them except it hurts because i want more and cant have it...

>>739534620

>I found my mother dead face down in a swimming pool when I was 3 years old
>They told me it was an "accident"
>Was suicide
>Father immediately re-married a total cunt who was a borderline personality
>Life was pretty must fucked from that point

>>739536393
That sounds like homo behavior. Vaginas disgust mee too anon.

>>739536781
i love the look of boobs and stuff in porn but i just cant even touch a girl enough to get her bra off. I'm not attracted to men in any way

>>739536123

Another.

>be around the same age as previous gt
>start finding loose teeth
>Fuck yeah, money for a little pain seems cool
>dad catches wind that I have a tooth loose
>he has some weird fixation with pulling teeth
>Dont know why, always has
>begins carrying around plyers fucking EVERYWHERE
>has a set in each room of the house
>has a set at his office
>has 2 sets in the car
>really starts to freak me out
>after a week or so of him finding this out, he picks me up from school and gets me pizza
>takes me home
>sits me on a stool in the kitchen
>asks "Anon, I heard from your teacher you've been using bad language at school..."
>Ohshit.jpeg
>"Im gonna wash your mouth out with soap for every bad word you-"
>as he started his threat, my mouth opened a bit and before he could finish he essentially held my jaw open with his hands
>pulls out pliers
>pulls not 1 but 2 of my fucking teeth in what felt like 5 seconds
>slips me a 5$
>walks away
>mom comes home to me crying with a bloody mouth and 5$ that I wont tell her where I got from

>>739536172
my aunt, why?

>>739536968
What the fuccckkkk

>be me
>about 3 or 4
>no friends, lonely as fuck
>have a weird dream that my poo is alive
>my poo is now my imaginary friend
>stop going to the bathroom because i don't want my friend to die flushed down the toilet
>crap outdoors for about 2 months, parents somehow don't notice
>get sick and go to hospital for 5 days
>avoid pooping altogether
>a mean nurse that i hated right from the start notices
>comes to me with a suppository
>puts it in my butt
>i think it's for my fever
>she says it's to help me poop
>i'm petrified
>cramps start hitting hard
>she takes me to the bathroom
>pulls my pajamas down
>sits me on the toilet
>i'm too shy to tell her why i haven't been pooping
>she tells me to push but i just try to hold it in
>after about 10 minutes i start cracking
>poop is slowly coming out
>most painful thing up to that point in my life
>can't stop it
>keeps coming out as i cry
>she keeps cheering and encouraging me to kill my friend
>i surrender and let it all out
>she wipes me up and takes me off the toilet
>applauds me for being a big boy and showing that poop where it belongs
>i can almost hear my friend begging me to save him
>she flushes the toilet
>watch my friend circle the drain and disappear
>cry myself to sleep
>going to the bathroom was a nightmare until i was about 10
>worst time of my life

>>739534620
My dad pointed a gun at my head and threatened to kill me and my siblings, along with my mom and himself. Pretty typical childhood.

>10 years old
>parents just divorced
>getting in bed not long after
>ask mom if I can stay up to read
>she gets pissed for no reason
>yells at me and throws my favorite stuffed animal at the wall
>storms out of the room
>sat there crying for a good five minutes and watching the shadow of her feet outside my door
>scared she'll come back in

Still don't like her much. Dad left because she's emotionally manipulative. It wasn't a bad divorce, just a bad mom.

My step mother would rub poison ivy in my underwear, and another of my step mothers made me a special treat for my birthday (oreo Pie mixed with brake fluid) I was forced to eat it as such I hate sweets

I farted.

>>739534620
molested by my cousin

>>739537760
Elaborate?

>>739537298
jesus christ

>>739535367
>when I was 13
>from when I was 7
I dont understand

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>>739537252

Yep my dad grew up in an eccentric dago family and was raised like a prince. He's afraid of ballons, looks and behaves like Frank Reynolds from It's always sunny and can calculate shit like fuckin rain man. Here's some more of my weird experiences with my dad as a kid:

>be around 10-11
>start being old enough to ride up front in the car
>driving one day
>he takes a cell phone call while driving
>something work related going to shit fast
>starts speeding
>starts getting angry
>all of a sudden relaxes and slows down
>From what I recall, the deal or whatever fell through on the spot
>calmly hangs up
>looks me in the eye
>proceeds to smash his cell phone into a plastic pulp against the dashboard
>throws plastic mess into the back seat
>we get home and he tells my mom he dropped his phone, then immediately gives me the same look right before he smashed his phone
>never tell my mom
>only seen that look again once and he basically choked me out in front of my family and HS gf

forced to wear girls clothes by sister and mother. started out because we were poor as shit so I had to wear my sister's old clothes, then into shit like dresses and ballerina shit "for fun".
was molested by my dad's cousin's 12 year old stepson when i was 5 because i was wearing a handmedown pink minnie mouse sweatshirt, had no idea it was "gay" but made fun of me and i told him i wore girls clothes all the time. then he made me wear his sister's clothes and forced me to "be his girl"

Im decently stable, have some depression, go thru manic "sissy fits" where I'll go full mentally ill and dress up and degrade myself...started the no fap life and working out and honestly it really helps....i still get off the trap/sissy/cd porn from time to time but I feel like I could have been worse

>>739537871
The clown costume is from when anon was 7 years old, but the story is from when he was 13

>>739538155
this is why girls really shouldnt raise guys on their own... they loooove degrading men its funny to them, i remember my sisters laughing at my nephew because he was crying his sister wouldnt give him some chocolate, women are mean man

>>739537871
He was 13 and the costume was from when he was seven

My much older cousin fucked me when I was 8, then I had to fuck him. I'm asexual and transgender now.

>>739534620
>be me
>3
>older cousin (14) while babysitting has me suck his dick
>he sucks mine in return
>go running outside to happily tell me mom what happened when she got home
>suddenly i dont see my cousin anymore
>tfw this led me to a life of confused homosexual feelings up until the past year or so
>tfw it probably wouldn't have been so bad if i wasnt told what he did was wrong
>in my mind for years i equated wrong/unusual with shit that feels good
>now im disgusted by the idea of men

>>739538374
so this is how traps are made. . . or serial killers?

Smothered countless times.

>>739534620
>family camping vacation after my parents got back together
>going well first few days
>have never had bonding like this. It's nice
>maybe we an be a family now
>my birthday is going to happen while we're still camping
>I'm actually excited for once
>morning of my birthday
>wake up to parents yelling at one another
>dad going fucking crazy, yelling at mom
>hear him hit her from inside the tent with my big brother
>dad goes off into woods
>yelling about how he "has to find it"
>mom unzips tent and takes bro and I into car
>see my dad come charging out of woods
>drive away and see my dad pick up our barbecue and smash it on ground out back car window
>car is silent and we drive to town
>mom crying the whole time
>after a while we go back
>dad sleeping in tent
>everyone forgot my birthday somehow
>too scared to mention it
>cry myself to sleep that night

>>739538374
This is true shit. Same anon from this >>739537647

Mom fucking made everything my fault I and younger sister didnt care. Then sister laughed when I cried and mom decides to fix the problem she fucking started.

Still can't get into a good relationship. I hate trusting women. Tell one of them something and you've told all of them.

>>739538646
how do you even remember shit from when you were 3? are you 12?

>>739538831
Im assuming after this event you became jaded and stopped letting yourself get excited?

>>739537924

I guess that you guys are all traumatized by sorta sexual shit, so i have one for that too.

>be around 12
>figuring out jerking off and shit
>still doesnt make sense, but feels good
>have a friend who's a girl
>she comes over one day
>realize she now has boobs
>decide to try and follow her into the bathroom or some autistic shit I concocted in my head when I was 12
>forces me out, slams the door
>finds a way to dodge me on the way out and runs to tell my dad
>she tells him
>he just kinda calms her down
>keeps us separate til she has to leave
>when she's gone, finds me doing whatever
>takes me to the computer
>sits me down
>pulls up the victorias secret online catalogue
>tells me to check it out and scroll through
>its like 01-02 so internet is shit
>see maybe 2 pics
>suddenly hear some metallic clanking behind me
>turn around
>get blasted by a fire extinguisher (aimed to the ground, but still like 3' away)
>run outside and hack up a lung
>comes outside and blasts me again
>follows up with a lecture on why he's not raising no sexual deviant
>leaves me outside confused and covered in some yellowish chemical shit.

>>739538978
My mom told me about it. Im 22.

when I was about 8, my older cousins, who were about 14 and 16 at the time, spit roasted me when my mom and aunt went out to the grocery store

>>739538705
Literally smothered? So, you're dead now?

>>739539037
srry then anon, out of curiousity, whats your sex life today? and maybe more of your past?

when I was 8 I was raped my a older family member (37) my mom came home and found me laying on the ground cover in blood. now I can't have children.

my uncle used to tell me to stand against the wall with my hands in the air while he would just sit on the sofa and open up a huge jar of pickled eggs and throw them until one hit me in the face

>>739539031
Kek

>>739539422
top kek

Not as bad as some of these anons, but here it is anyway.

>about 7
>go to grandparents house with autistic cousin who is two years older
>tells me to come in the bathroom
>has me take off pants
>just looks
>I think it's funny because "being naked haha"
>fastforward
>for years I think it's just a thing people do
>invite neighborhood girls over
>have them strip in my closet
>parents find out
>think im some kind of deviant because I didnt know better

Shit still haunts me

>>739539422
Sounds like a good sport

>>739538989
Yeah, pretty dead on. I really hate getting presents on like Christmas and my birthday too. Found out later that my dad was looking for the hard drugs my mom was hiding

>babysat by family friend when I was like 9 or 10
>she was about 14-15
>dropped off at her place and my mom left
>she proceeded to show me hentai on her computer
>the memory gets blurry but I'm pretty sure I was molested

Needless to say that shit really fucked me up. I now struggle with a porn addiction because that was literally my first exposure to sex, etc.

I am struggling but I think Nofap is the answer. I keep failing after like 5 days.

>>739539348
Single, straight now.

About a year and a half ago i was still taking dick in my ass.

I was having gay sexual encounters from the time i was 7 until then. I remember jacking off to a playgirl magazine in my room.

I also had several regrettable sexual encounters with girls, but i always felt a certain thrill from guys.

I liked the feeling of the rush of doing something secretive. Something was broken for a while.

I found that catalogging all of my experiences on paper helped me see how dishonest i was being with myself.

I always called myself faithful in my relationships.. couldnt be farther from the truth. I was a big fat cheating scumbag.

But i am done seeking the sensations. I honestly get disgusted by the idea of a mans penis now.

Not to say anal sex doesnt feel good.. i still have some things to work out apparently.

>die

>>739538374
men are also mean man

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDwYB73gibc

>be 3 or 4
>Rugrats In Paris on VHS
>9:30 at night
>Movie ends, brother and sister left the room
>I didnt know how movies worked yet, so I stayed till the credits
>Alone in a dark ass room
>Screen goes black
>This fucking demon slime monster from hell pops up on screen
>Saying some wierd shit I dont understand, but he's screaming it in the most uncanny voice
>Shaking in fear
>Demon splat monster smiles at me for what feels like 3 min
>Screen goes completely black
>VHS static
>I run as fast as I can to my dad's room

For years I thought that this thing would come into my room and attach itself to me like a fucking venom symbiote from spiderman. Call me a pussy If you want, but this is the one thing that scared the shit out of me until I was like 14. Even to this day, I cant watch rugrats or rocket power without turning it off at the end.

when I was about 11 a crazy child abused 13 year old girl flashed me her vagina and kind of messed me up

>>739534620
Early sexual experiences.

>>739534620
I was born in China.

>>739540803
did u died?

>>739537298
What the fuck did I just read.

>>739540376
Experiencing some creepy shit someday is what keeps me living on.

>>739534620
>7 or 8 year old me and friends dug a small tunnel, entrances literally only a meter apart but we were kids and it was fun
>One day in the tunnel, coming out one end and there was a bully blocking my path.
>Another at the other end.
>Forced me to strip down and show my weiner or bullies wouldn't let me leave
>Get made fun of.

another

>Rope climbing in gym class, also around that age.
>Manage to climb up somehow
>Slide down the rope, rush of tingling feelings in my crotch
>Have to go shower with the rest of classmates
>It's a boner
>Try to hide it
>Get made fun of again, classmates shouting "Anon has a boner!"

I guess that's where my trust issues/relationship issues and social anxiety comes from, as well as my fetish for exhibitionism/voyeurism. It's a weird mix of sexual deviancy when I'm alone, wanting to get caught doing sexual stuff but not wanting any sexual activity with people.
As for friendships/relationships I have no trouble socializing, but it's all rather reserved and platonic. I never let my emotional guard down.

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>>739534620
This thread reminded me of frog dad

>>739537760

I molested my cousin. Tell your story let's see if we match!

>>739539031
>>739537924
>>739536968
>>739536123

kek'd at all of these. you dad sounds like a fucking lunatic

>>739541663
kek

>>739537760
do it

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Not really traum, but embarrasing:
>be maybe 5-6 years old
>wake up in the middle of the nigh
>"I really need to fucking pee"
>the toilet is on the other side of the house
>too scared to go myself
>about to piss my pant
>hunch over in the corner of the room
>start pissing like crazy
>next morning i tell my mom that our cat did it
>there is litteraly a small pool of piss on the floor
>she buys it
>mfw

>>739541705

He fucking is. It's fun but scary.

I think being around him as a kid made me better able to cope with traumatic shit and at least come off as well adjusted. But he def has screwed me up.

Here's another quick one:

>be in gradeschool
>get in trouble for one reason or another
>he picks me up from school
>is fuckin livid
>can see him seething while he's driving
>tell him my side of the story
>before I can finish, he just takes his hands off the wheel and folds his arms
>"dad... what are y-"
>"You dont wanna behave in school? well how would you like to be in the hospital for a while to make you truly appreciate getting a free education?"
>veers into the other lane for a sec
>shit bricks
>he corrects
>didn't get in trouble at school for like 2 years

>grow up abusive parents
>Married to a beautiful woman have a beautiful son
>son is 7 years old
>Son breaks a vase a old friend give me it before he died
>I uncontrollably rage and start shouting
>beat him but before my hand hit his face i remember my dad
>Son is crying
>I just hug him and cry
>Buy him an ice cream and a Nintendo switch so he can forgive me

>>739537760
I molested my cousin, she fucks me now.

>>739539420

I read these threads for the lulz but this made me sad. Sorry this happened to you.

>>739539094

Did you enjoy it?

>>739534620
Raped on the bus in the 8th grade. Multiple people just watched. Never reported it.

>>739537542
Nah, my guy you gotta green text and type with a bit more detail

>>739542597
poor kid must be confused as shit and will probably post in a similar thread one day. maybe try to explain to him why you got violent?

>Be 7
>Mom loved to "scare" me and my siblings for "fun" or to teach us a lesson
>One day im in the car getting picked up from kindergarten
>Teacher tells my mom im a fussy kid and refuses to share with other kids
>Mom gets pissed and on the way home starts yelling
>"So you want to be a loud and selfish little brat. Well i'll take you where you belong then."
>Drives to an adoption center a few miles from my old house
>"Get out anon. You wanna be a bad kid youre gonna go where the fuckin bad kids go"
>Start crying and get out, begging her not to go and to take me home
>Drives off and around the block once before picking me up again and taking me home


There were many other times like this. Whenever i bring them up she refuses to acknowledge them. Thinking about doing this same shit to her when shes old and senile

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>>739534620
i should have studied physics and then astrophysics or particle physics.
at least i would know a programming language and choose where to work like my friend is doing.
plus I'd have had a great time at the uni

>>739543565
Believe it or not my mom did the exact thing to me

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>>739543565
you want to be around your demented, senile mom when you'll be an adult? that cuts it if you plan to stay single

My dad did many things, he kicked me, killed my cat, made us give away our dog 3 months after we got him, made fun of my mom after she died. Then I had to live with him full time and he never let me hang out with friends or do anything fun. After I turned 16 I ran away to my stepdads but my stepdad was emotionally abusive (he didn't know it). Almost every weekend his friends would get blackout drunk and make fun of me. I'm really fucked from it and I'll never be normal. I'm super sadistic and deliberately hurt people emotionally for my own entertainment.

>>739542669
>I molested my cousin, she fucks me now
I used to have fun with my cousing when kids, and now, sometimes she gets clingy but I'm too much of a pussy to cross the line.

my mom's been a drinker since i was 14 (that i remember)

>>739544857
You should do it anon, you'd get some good pleasure out of it

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>When I was 7 my brother raped my asshole and forced me to suck his dick.
>When I was 11 I was caught kissing and fondling my 10 year old cousin's tits by both our moms
>When I was 13 I got into a fight and won, but literally shat myself in the process due to getting kicked in the stomach super hard. Despite the guy having a permanently ruined nose and a broken arm from being thrown off a stage, he was laughing at me as I left a trail running out of the multi-purpose room
>When I was 15, I was dragged along to a party by my friends and ended up finding my GF being double-teamed by some guys I didn't know. She said she was at a doctor's appointment with her Mom at the time; I ended up spreading around a video between friends showing how slutty she was and pasted a bunch of print-outs of the videos within all the boys bathrooms. She killed herself but left a note specifically stating that she loved me.
>When I was 17 I found my first job at a steak and shake. The manager ended up being gay and would hint at potential raises if I did things for him. Left the place after corporate started wondering why I was making $12/hr.
>When I was 18 I fucked my sister. It was smelly, slippery, and really fucking odd but it wasn't bad. The issue starts with her becoming sex-crazed despite me being her little brother. She would chase out any girl I brought home and would stalk me.
>When I was 22 I shot my dog in the back of his head. He was dying and needed to be put down, but I couldn't afford it in the vet so I did it myself. It still haunts me to this day.
>Be me
>Be 23 years old
>Last month in June
>Working with a field vet (someone who travels around to farms to check on the animals)
>She asks me to drive back to the clinic to pick some stuff up
>Tell her I don't know how to drive due t o reasons
>She asks me to get the paperwork done when she's gone then
>Alright
>Everything goes well for me
>Two hours later, learn she was in a severe car accident and died instantly
>mfw

> Be me 11 y/o
>visitning my neighbour
> They got a son who is 15-16
> Watching youtube with him
> he deciedes to search for redtube. (??still dont know why???)
> "ooh shiit what is that"
>Show me this teacher pornvid where he starts off fapping in his chair in class, looks fun.
> Next monday in class, gotta test that shit
>Pants down, didnt know how to fap so just slam around my dick kinda.
>Teacher and classmates starts to notice
>ooh fuck
>been akward since then when i meet people who "know about this" which is everyone since word got out fast.

>>739542921
explain? also sage.

>>739545809
Bump because I lived an average life.

>Be maybe 6
>Did something to my sister, dad pissed off
>Almost never get spanked, but this time my dad chased after me
>I was so scared I hid under a thin blanket, mainly thinking my dad would see that I'm sorry and would let go
>Still get spanked
>Feel extremely betrayed

>Be maybe 7 or 8
>Invited by some dude from my class to hang out at his home with some other dude
>"Yo check this really cool thing on my computer"
>Opens up downloaded film
>Looks for specific scene, finds it
>My face when I'm the most innocent I've ever been watching child get shot in the back
>It's evening time back home
>Call mom, "I need to tell you something"
>Start crying saying I saw a kid die
>Mom insists that it was not real, because it's a movie and shit
>Want to believe her, but I tell myself she wasn't there so she can't know
>First time I didn't trust my parents

To be continued, got more shit that made me sad

>Older sister and father fought like crazy
>Drug use
>"Tries" to commit suicide
>Parents always searching his room and find shit
>always screaming
>remember my dad saying if "If I find the pills I'll swallow them all myself"
>mom always crying
>picked on in school for lesbian sister
>losing fist fights and friends left and right
>sister now my brother
>don't really tell my friends about it
>stick up for him when I can
>but he's a real piece of shit and burned all his bridges
>kind of hate his guts
>support lgbt

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http://weedinmario.ytmnd.com/

My parents offered me to play the exorcist maze game when I was like 5-6. I had nightmares with that face for several years. No more trauma anymore but since then I react to scares worse than regular people do. Unconsciously and annoying as fuck.

>>739547026
I went through almost the exact same situation anon.

>>739546721
Cont.

>Be maybe 8 or 9
>At a birthday party of the same dude that showed me the scene with the dead child
>"Let's watch The Grudge"
>Might honestly be the first horror film I have ever seen
>Can no longer sleep in my own room and have to sleep with the lights on because I'm so irrationally scared

>Be maybe 9 or 10
>Once again, for the third and last time at that guy's house
>He invited me to his home, just me
>Felt really happy, because I thought I made a new friend. He invited me before, but not in the same way
>At his house be a little stupid
>Because I'm happy to have a new friend, I do annoying things like lean on him and make silly noises, just for a laugh
>He doesn't like it, tells me to stop
>I don't take him seriously, he grabs my bag
>I don't fight it, just follow him to see what he does with my bag
>He opens the door, I suspect nothing
>He throws my schoolbag out of the door into the stairwell
>He looks at me impatiently until I go to grab it
>Door slams behind me locks immediately
>Still confused, try to open door and knock several times, no respomse
>It dawns on me
>Walk all the way home crying

To be continued

>>739542956
I think he was pretty succinct. There was a dad, dad threatens everyone with a gun, obviously is a retard because you don't point a gun at someone unless you intend to kill them.
in the words of Ducco, "If you're going to shoot, shoot, don't talk"
so basically on top of being crazy this father is stupid

My dad left before I was born. I had to rehabilitate when I was born because my mom used heroïn ( still does..) I was molested by my nephew when I was like 6 or 7. My mom caught him with me but nothing really happened. I've heard my mom say I was a mistake and that she would have died during her pregnancy with me than living the life we are in now.

I'm 24. Not doing well at all

>>739547665
I Needed a good laugh. Why you gotta hurt me like this anon. I just wanted to laugh at some funny stories

>>739547910
Sorry

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>parents divorce when im very young (about 2-3)
>never got to experience a real family life
>mom always tells me dad is evil, and vice versa
>never liked either of my parents because they battled over custody all the time
>decided to live with dad because he could provide for me better, because he wasnt lower class like my mom
>fast forward to today, am 17 kissless virgin, never had gf
>my parents terrible relationship makes me afraid of being in a relationship, because im worried im always going to be used/abused by my partner
>worried about my potential partner taking 1/2 my belongings and taking my children and money just because they can, and the USA always gives custody to woman
>mfw parents ruined my life

>>739547393
Just to clarify, my inability to sleep in my room lasted until I was 13, it got me real fucked up

Cont.

>Be maybe 10
>Me and my school friends are out preparing for a big bonfire, we're grabbing a bunch of scrap wood
>Go to this undeveloped batural valley in between to parts of the neighborhood
>See a bunch of scrap underneath the road on the other side of the small valley
>Volunteer to go alone and take it
>Cross small valley, reach scrap wood
>As I turn around I realize my friends ditched me
>I thought the were just behind a small hill
>Walk all the way to the hill, they are gone
>Mfw when they completely ditched me in the valley
>Mfw I trusted them to wait for me

>Growing up ages 9-11 my parents were fighting all the time
>Dad has Hepatitis C and goes through chemo
>Mom has a secret addiction to codeine, know nothing
>This and all the past shit I talked about, along with other things made me extremely depressed
>It's the end of 6th grade and I need to choose my middle school
>Two choices, at the time I was religious so it was this half religious school with girls and boys in the same calss, and this completely religious school with only guys in the whole school
>Get accepted to religious school
>Suddenly get an invitation for an interview at the half religious one
>Too depressed, don't wanna go outside, say "No it's fine I was already accepted to another school"
>Get bullied for the next year for having somewhat long hair, get called faggot and the likes
>Suicidal thoughts worsen
>Can't change schools because of a MASSIVE teachers strike
>Not going to school during the strike worsens depression
>Next year I go to the same school that rejected me
>Most students are none religious, to my shock they are way kinder
>Get left alone during recess, peace at last
>Long holiday commences
>Playing favourite MMO on couch none stop worsens
>Depression worsens
>Stop going to school for a month after holiday
>Admit myself to a psychiatric hospital at 13

>>739545754
write a book

>>739534620
>be me
>6 or 7 years old
>have abusive mother
>henpecked father
>do something wrong, don't remember what it was
>mother hits face several times with all of her strength
>broke my nose
>left on the floor for around two hours bleeding profusely from the nose without the strength to get up
>mother continues on with her day like normal
>dad gets home
>starts shouting match with mother
>I pass out
>Dad takes me to ER

Goddamn I hate my mother.

>>739547665
I'm sorry

>>739541044
Sì

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>>739545754
Holy mother of fucking god, are you ok man?
That is some rough shit, I don't even know how you cope up with this. Everybody is whining about being beat up by their dad or abused by their mom and how it caused many traumas, but you throw this out calmly. I'm baffled.

Welp

>>739545803
Move downs, or country, or just simply state if you're american, Just move as far away. It takes a few years but you'll make good friends after a while.

>>739545754
sounds like a psychopath to me

>>739540376
Took me a minute to realize what you were talking about.
I think klasky csupo fucked up most of the kids who saw him

>>739545803
boring. thats literally nothing

>4 years old
>has a fear of balloons
(Still not sure why, probably the popping)
>sisters friend is coming back from a surgery
>set up her party for when she comes back
>sitting in the other room while they do the work
>after a while I come out
>the whole floor is covered in balloons
>stands there terrified
>"anon we have to go"
>doesn't move
>mom has to pick me up as I'm having a fit
>I get yelled at for having in appropriate begaviour

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>>739545754
I am cheering for you man don't stop going forward

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>>739550238

>>739534620
I remember being attacked by a demon as a kid. I remember being awake and asleep at the same time, and I was trying to get away. All I know was that it wanted me to die. At one point I woke up and got out of bed, not to run to my parents room but to just lie down in the corner of my room and die. I literally thought I was gonna die, and no matter how badly I wanted to I couldn't get away. Sorry if that was too dark, I knew a girl in college who got pulled out of her bed by a demon she couldn't see, and she got a celtic rune tattoo that said "paranormal." I was only 5 when it happened and I shut down completely and only recently remembered what happened to me

>>739550766
>>>/x/

>>739548797
Books seem tedious and I don't want my life story to be known in the first place.

>>739549333
I have trouble maintaining non-professional relationships. Outside of that big issue, I had trouble coping with everything while growing up and defaulted to sex as a stress relief like a true scumlord. Since I turned 19 though, I've been going to the gym instead and found it has massive stress-relieving tendencies for me. Been going at least 3 times a week since. Better to face what happened than let it haunt me as I try to move forward anyway.

>>739549525
Pretty thin line. If I didn't find an alternative to relieving my stress I might've lost it.

>>739550238
Thanks anon.

dont remember this, but this is what family says
>be me. 6-7 years
>house is in the middle of farm land
>electric fences everywhere
>it's summer, need to owe, house too far
>pissed on the fence
>dick tip touches the fence
>woke up the next day in the hospital
>repeat it all three days later
my memory got fucked guys

>>739549108
>be me
>6
>mother starts arguement over something I can't remember
>sent to room in basement
>have to pee
>mother won't let me leave room. She's locked it from the outside. I actually don't know why I couldn't even leave the room whether it be that she held the door shut or that I chose ot to leave bc submissive abused mormon "pretty perfect" white suburban home or if I really was locked in room.
>pee pee so bad
>screaming and pleading for mom to let me pee in a merciful intonation.
>can't hold it any longer.
>*pissle trash can*
>announce im peeing into liner-less trashcan purchased by mom with bastard fathers' cash probably
>mom rushes into the room
>i think she's upset im acting out bc of what she's done
>grabs plastic clothes hanger from my wall
>yells "stop it stop it stop it" while beating me with the now shattered hanger
>mfw all I remember is saying fuck you mom over and over again to myself until i cried myself to sleep
>age 20
>father distant
>mother psycho
>going to therapist with mother right now, yet to tell this traumatic story with psychiatrist
>just want to be loved but can't even love myself.
>i just wanted to be loved

>>739543535
The kids 7

>>739539031
your dad is human filth and didn't deserve to raise children.

>>739548551
>parents divorce
God dammit, that brought back an old memory. How the fuck did I forgot about it?

My parents had never got along too well; they use to argue a lot. When I was ~11, they got into a big fight, screaming out loud, and at some point they went to their room and locked the door. Me and my brother got a pretty bad feeling about it, and a few seconds later we could hear mom scream in pain and stuff being thrown. Me and my brother desperately tried to break through the door and screamed for them to stop, but their reply was something like "its ok, go play outside".

I don't know how fucking long did it took for them to came out, but felt like a fucking eternity. When they came out, they had some cuts and bruises, but the huge black eye my mom had is what impacted me the most.

A couple of hours later my mom left. I could remember my parents asking me who did I want to stay with. I chose my dad, because I've always been more comfortable and closer to his family than my mom's. My brother is the other way around, so he left with my mom.

They came back together a few years later and they're still together by now. They still argue a lot, but they've never gotten physical again.

Now, about the trauma... I've been told a lot from people who knew me since I was little, that my personality changed a lot. When I was a child, I was very sociable and liked to playing around with everybody. Now I'm a very introverted person that is bothered by social interaction. Plus, I don't have a connection with my brother, and whenever we have to interact with each other, is kind of awkward, like we are strangers.

>>739551350
Which means you can't explain to him why you got mad and apologize? Being 7 doesn't mean you're an absolute retard who can't understand some objects have personal value.

>>739537871
>because you are a halfwit

>>739551310
Kill your mom, or like some other dude said, fuck with her bad when she's old and senile.

My idea is, when she's dying from alzheimer's, beat her up and steal her purse, and tell all others you have no idea who it was and the police are investiagating. Fuck your mom is human filth.

>>739544857
I am exactly the same man, i wish i had the balls to do something.

>>739539420
Lots of people can't have children.
Are you sure that this is the reason?
It might help if you can disassociate the 2 life traumas

my brother tried to make me fellate him :(

>>739547665
You write well at least

>>739552587
maybe their genitalia was damaged

>>739539680
This should not be a life changing event
You're making too much if it and looking for excuses for your current behavior

>>739545754
Did your brother get in trouble?

>>739537542
Same here, Anon. Although it was a step dad. And there were also constant threats of burning the house down around us.

>>739552824
no such thing as a porn "addiction" just that women are gay and masturbation feelsgoodman.jpg

>>739534620
Had lice in 6th grade. Been stressing abt getting it again for 8 fucking years

>>739534620
I M NEVER GONNA DANCE AGAIN

During my younger years, up until I was around 17 or 18, I lived in a ramshackle community in the deep south of Georgia.

This was back in the late 60's, so nobody gave a fuck what happened in the domestics.

I have an older brother, let's call him Jebediah. Me and Jebediah have the same dad, but his mom died in childbirth and our dad met my mom at Jeb's mom's funeral. Not even weeks later after Jeb's mom died, my dad married my mom.

My dad loved his old girlfriend more than the entire goddamn world and he hates Jebediah because he was the reason she died. Me and Jeb were born about 10 months apart, and being the same age as my brother, it was pretty scary to see what dad did to him.

We lived in a very religious household, so the very mention of science was sinful. Me and Jebediah, unfortunately, loved the sciences, but only he was ballsy enough to make it outspoken. Our dad constantly beat the shit out of Jebediah. I mean along the lines of a permanently fucked eye or an arm so broken the bone pierces through. Seeing that shit as a 4-5 year old still gives me nightmares.

Even the way dad yelled and slammed Jeb against the wall was enough to give me consistent night terrors. Thank god he liked me. I couldn't do anything to help my poor brother because I was just too scared.

Jeb and I got along quite well despite all the abuse Jeb went through. The last time I saw and spoke to the Jeb I grew up with was around 1963 when our dad stabbed him in the head repeatedly with a rusty knife he found in the barn.

Shit, I came home from high school and I remember screaming at Jeb soaked in dried blood and croaking. Now, the local hospital was obviously a shithole fit for a shithole town, and they managed to stop the bleeding before the actual paramedics arrived.

I saw Jeb on his deathbed, and I saw that thousand-yard stare in his eyes, like the kind grandpa had from WWI. The 60's had shitty technology so they did their best to patch his frontal lobe up.
(continued)

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>nuff said

>>739534620
This will be so confusing and embarrasing and wtf at the same time.
>be 9
>playing flash games
>finds cool new game
>open link
>a giant qr code appears in all the screen
>me horrified
>traumated from now
Since that day when I see a barcode or something like that I have a muscle cramp all in my body and feel weak.

>>739537086
dude that's hot as fuck

>father tried to start a cult and molested the whole family.
>mother used to poison my food and get me sick on purpose.
>father would shoot coke and do sadistic things to me to make me think i was going to die because he thought it was funny.
>used heroin for the first time at 13.
>so many suicide attempts i can't count.

I'm amazing.

>>739553449
Damn she did not age well.

>>739536932
Gynophobia

>>739545754
damn

>>739537298
I loved this story

>>739553368
I'm shaking as I type this. I didn't thinking something from 50 years ago would phase me like this.

Anyway, Jeb barely pulled through but he was rendered completely disabled until he killed himself in 1967. My mom couldn't handle that and jumped off a building's roof while high on LSD.

I'm 72 now and the entire ordeal with my family honestly has me feeling so broken inside. I have started a healthy family of my own but I think I've been developing alzheimer's. I'm so scared because I don't want to join my dad in whatever the after life has to offer. I can't stop shaking. It's hard to type.

>>739548581
All these things you describe are very slightly worse than normal growing up experiences. You should have been able to process and learn from them.
>booking yourself into psyche is probably a good idea

>>739554016
i'll never get tired of reading dumb stories. moar pls

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>>739537298

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>im in 4th grade(i think)
>be best friends ever since pre-k with a kid named jimmy
>me and jimmy are in the same class (ayyy)
>he tells me to join him in the bathroom
>thinking oh gee we Danger students two kids in the bathroom at the same time? IM SO COOL
>we make faces in mirror and he shows me a fishing lure its blue yellow and red
>i think its really cool
>he puts it on the paper towel dispenser and pulls his pants down
>uhh
>kiss it or i wont be best friends with you anymore
>i dont wanna
>ill do yours too dont worry
>i do it
>he does it
>feel really wrong for doing it i don't wanna be gay
>teacher opens the door after our pants are back up
>what are you two doing in here?
>oh no we got caught
>totally forget about penis play time he made me do
>teacher lets us off with a warning
>forget about it the very next day after
>years later
>im walking down the road
>jimmy stops in his truck asks if i want a ride
>say yeah
>as i get in the truck i remember that day
>get to my stop without saying a word
>never see him again

should i have brought it up? i feel like i should have but i don't know.

>>739552481
Yea, I fantasize a lot about it, but for some fucking reason I can't explain, I can't do it. Last time I had the opportunity was last december. We went to the beach on a family trip, and all of a sudden she was all touchy with me in the water. We hugged, held hands and I caressed her thighs several times that week, but didn't do more than that.

>inb4 gigantic faggot

> be me
> parents divorce at age 2
> havent seen or heard from my mother since
> going through grade school was rough
> around Mothers Day every year class would make some retarded macaroni plate thing and write a letter to their mothers for Mothers Day.
> I believe it was grade 2?
> fucking around with macaroni and glue and shit then all of a sudden go dead quiet.
> I dont have a mother.
> completely break down and cry
> everyone is like wtf.mp3
> teacher knows
> cont....?

>be me
>parents split soon after I was born
>have four parents for as long as I can remember
>step-mom and step-dad both hated me
>wasn't an angel but did what they asked most of the time
>step-father uses any chance he gets to berate me, put me down, or call me stuff like "pussy" "bitch" "retard" and other degrading words to make fun of me
>does this in-front of family and friends
>most of my family joined in
>mom was the only one who took care of me
>busy with two children and whoever stepdad had over
>felt like too much of a nuisance to even ask for food, let alone love
>step-mom also degraded me, but instead of trying to make fun and embarrass me, she did it to specifically make me a scapegoat and make sure I hated myself and that I was alone
>she stopped me from calling my mom
>dad was an alcoholic, so he was nonexistent in my life
>they would fight all night, breaking glasses, screaming, walking out
>had panic attacks at least once a week because of this
>got very little sleep
>this lead to step-mom having more things to yell at me about
>all of this resulted in crushing loneliness throughout my life
>also lead to an intense self-hatred
>they stopped once I started fighting back, so around 10
>from 10-13 didn't realize I was abused
>start to research abuse
>read about emotional abuse
>this wasn't even a concept to me before
>realize that I spent most of my life abused
>realize that the loneliness, social anxiety, and emptiness isn't normal
>mom takes me to therapist
>diagnosed with bpd, social anxiety, and depression
>most of teens are spent coming to realize all of this
>20 now
>still suffer from everything listed
>I'm secretly still angry over all of this
>cant do anything because my stepfather provided for me all those years
>feign that I don't care about it
>still can't get close to anyone out of fear
>still isolate myself and bathe in the loneliness
>still a bitch
sorry for the dump

>>739554395
I took a bath with my friend when we were 8-9 and we ended up giving each other footjobs without really knowing what we were doing. I think some stuff is normal but who knows.

>>739540221
Men will beat the fuck out of you because you pissed them off. Women will crack your psyche just because they're bored.

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>>739534620
It was a chilly autumn evening when my father took my brother’s and me to their football practice at the park. I was too young to play football then, and did not have the attention span to watch them practice so my father took me to the playground at the other end of the facilities. It was a brand-new playground with recently installed equipment; there were various slides, ladders, tic-tac-toe games built into the walls, and even a metal bar any child could grab that, with enough momentum, would carry them from one end of the playground equipment to the other. It was large, brown, and made of wood. The playground had giant, wooden pillars that supported the structure, and everything save for the ladders and slides was also wooden. The main structure was only the focal point of the playground, however, because there was also a ten-foot diameter merry-go-round, lots of trees for climbing, and even various sets of swings. The swings were not even all the same, there were the standard flat seats for bigger kids and some brown seated swings for smaller children. These brown seated swings had three holes in them, and were fastened to the wooden beams supporting the swing set by metal chains. The first hole was the largest, it was where the child was placed, and there were two more holes for the legs to go through; these swings were designed so parents could push their small children as much as the child desired without putting the child in any real danger as the top of the seat could easily sit about waist high, or higher, depending on the child in the seat. For all pre-adolescent children, this was the place to be, the most exciting part of our small, suburban town.
My brothers were both older than me, one was three years older than me and the other was seven years older than me. I was about five years old at the time, which made my brothers eight and twelve respectively

>>739534620
My mom killed my cat infrount of me with a hammer when i was 7=8

Got hit by a car when I was 13

My mom was mental Ill , USed to rock back and forth singing a song like , ou god i wish I was dead, dead in the head , dead in the heart on reapeat for about 2 hours.

Used to scream in the middle of the night 100 time a year, whip Coffee Mugs ( Sixe of a beer mug at me)

Missed a ton of school because of her crazy shit

Fun Times.

Almost miss them, Found her dead in her apartment about a week after my last birthday, she had cancer

>>739535485
):

>>739534620
I was never a good swimmer because I was afraid of water, and my stepdad, instead of being helpful would just throw me into bodies of water and I almost drowned 10s of times. I developed the inability to hold my breath basically. Whenever I go underwater my body just automatically breathes in.

I essentially get to miss out on all kinds of fun water stuff. I got kicked out the navy because I couldn't swim either. (I joined thinking it wasn't as bad as it was because I hadn't tried to swim in years).

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>>739555096
. My parents owned a Ford Aerostar minivan, which was at the time one of the preeminent middle-class, suburban family vehicles that was replacing the aging station-wagons of the 1980s. My father loaded us boys up in the minivan and took us through town to the park. It was a pretty town, typified the American middle-class lifestyle during the 1990s. There was a negligible amount of violent crime, children could still play in the street from dawn until dusk without parental supervision, the houses were all well maintained, and there were dozens of trees for every person. Anyone who looked at this town would have been charmed by its unassuming nature, it was classic suburbia. As we drove through town I watched the trees and houses whiz by, and the sun was still high in the air as evening set in. Within a few minutes we had arrived at the park! At this side of the park there were various young men milling around in their football uniforms, young ladies beginning their cheerleading practice, and parents congregating on the bleachers getting ready to watch practice begin. Elsewhere, along the adjacent bicycle path that ran parallel to the park, there were joggers getting in their post-work exercise as well as people walking their dogs.
My brothers leaped out of the minivan with their helmets and shoulder pads in hand and ran toward the field while my father took his time to get me out and place me gently on the ground. Together we walked over to the bleachers, and I asked my father,
“Can we go to the playground?”

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>>739555234
He told me “Later,” and we took our seats and sat with the fathers on the bleachers. The older boys suited up, clad in their pads, helmets, and jerseys, and music started playing behind us as the cheerleader practice began. The boys, in all of their various age groups, lined up in columns of two and started jogging around the field to begin their warm ups. However, I was not interested in watching the older boys practice, no, I wanted to feel the cool air against my face as I slid down slides, I wanted to feel the cold metal bars as I climbed up ladders, I wanted the freedom of the jungle-gym at the playground. I wanted to play, I wanted to have fun, I had no patience for watching a boring football practice. So once again I asked my father,
“Can we go to the playground?” And again, he told me,
“Later, we’re watching your brothers practice. They need us to show our support.”
I protested “But I want to go to the playground. It’s right over there, I can see it from here, football practice is boring.” But to no avail, I still could not achieve my goal of merry-go-rounds and Tarzan bars, I was stuck watching the practice. I couldn’t bear it any longer, I started raising my voice in protest, this time demanding I get to go to the park. “You don’t need to come with me, you will be able to see me from here, just say I can go to the playground.”
Another parent chimed in “Why don’t you just take him to the playground?”
Father responded to this interjection with a stern tone “I came here to support my sons while they are at football practice. It’s one of the things I looked forward to when they were born, being able to watch them at sports practices and games. So here I am.”
“Well, that may be true, but you have a young son with you, and your boys will never notice you’re at the playground.

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>>739555312
Seeing as how one of them is on the other side of the football field practicing I do not think they would even notice your presence, or lack thereof, anyway. Why don’t you just take your little one to the playground? He’s pleading with you.”
Once again, my balky father objected to this other man’s contumacious suggestion. “Since the day they were born this is what I’ve wanted to do. I didn’t come here to take my youngest son to the playground, I came here to watch my other two sons at practice. This isn’t any of your business.”
“Well, if you didn’t come here to let your son play at the playground why did you even bring him here? We didn’t come to the park today to listen to him complain the entire time. Why isn’t he at home with his mother then?”
“She is working right now. I work during the day, she works at night while I watch the kids. And again, it’s none of your business.”
“You’re right, it’s none of my business, but you answered and I will keep telling you that we do not want to spend the next couple hours listening to your son beg you to take him to the playground. In addition to that, since your wife is at work right now, you are charged with the responsibility of taking care of your youngest son since you did not find someone to babysit him. That means you must forgo your desire to watch your sons at football practice and take your youngest to the playground until he’s old enough to practice too. Go, take him, and let us those of us without young children watch ours at practice.”
Finally, my father stood up and told me we could go.

>>739555312
saved dat shit so hard famlamz

>>739555000
CHECKED
H
E
C
K
E
D

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>>739555385
He said something which I did not understand to the other man, firmly grasped my hand, and we marched across the park to the playground. I hurried as quickly as my little legs could carry me, which apparently was not as fast as the long strides of the long legs of my father. After what felt like an eternity we had finally made it, I was achieving my goal, I could play to my heart’s delight. There were no other boys or girls my age present, but that did not matter because my father was at the park and I could play for the next couple of hours!
He asked me, “What do you want to do first?”
To which I responded, “Spin me on the merry-go-round!” And he did, and boy did he, because what started off as a slow spin quickly became a precipitous series of revolutions. I have no idea how long I was on the merry-go-round, but by the time it stopped my head kept spinning while I was stationery. I descended from the merry-go-round platform and wobbled back and forth toward the jungle gym. As quickly as I could, despite my temporary lapse of agility, I ascended the stairs to the jungle gym. I climbed as high as I could so I could reach the tallest slide and hopped right into it. It was a yellow slide, it had a cover on it with several twists and turns that made it even more exciting, and at the bottom the cover ended and I could feel the wind against my face as I finished sailing down it. It was incredible, I had to go again, and I climbed the ladder this time, the metal bars were cold despite how sunny it was. I hurried to the slide and descended it once more and felt the exhilaration.

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>>739555425
>>739555419
My father asked me, “Are you done yet?”
So, I told him “No, I want to do the Tarzan bar now,” and I climbed the ladder once more, took hold of the yellow bar, and did my best to propel myself to the other side. Unfortunately, I did not make it that far, the bar stopped moving maybe half-way and I was left dangling maybe four or five feet in the air. Realizing that I had misjudged the distance I asked my father for assistance, he strolled over to me, grabbed me, and placed me on the ground while telling me that since I could not get across by my own power I could not do the Tarzan bar anymore. Dismayed, I climbed the tires at the bottom of the platform where the Tarzan bar terminated and went down the small, metal slide next to it. The late afternoon, autumn temperature made it cold but it was still fun. I sprinted up the small set of stairs, brushing my hand against the tic-tac-toe board and spinning the pieces so they made an interesting sound. I ran across the bridge to the next platform, it was a series of wooden planks held together with ropes that gave children the impression of running across a rickety bridge suspended between two cliffs in the mountains despite actually being two feet off of the ground. It shook beneath my little feet, I felt like I was Indiana Jones as I traversed the bridge and reached the other side of the jungle gym.
Once more my father asked me, “Are you done yet?”

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>>739555474
I again told him “No!” I scaled this side of the jungle gym, and put my hands on the bars next to the slide. This slide was like the first, yellow and covered with twists and turns. I looked out over the edge, like a pirate in the mast looking out over the horizon for land or other ships, and could see the park lights had already become illuminated. The sun was getting ready to clear the horizon and the sky became brilliant shades of yellow, red, and orange. My father stood facing the football fields, his eyes fixed upon the players who even from my vantage point looked quite small. I grasped the metal bars at the crest of the jungle gym, lifted my feet, and flung myself down the slide as fast as I could. My ears tingled because of the incipient chill, and my fun had not yet reached its apogee. I once again ascended the structure and shouted to my father, “Do you want to play tic-tac-toe?” He did not respond, so I reiterated, “I want to play tic-tac-toe, do you want to play with me?”

>>739555499
this better end with you getting raped under the jungle gym while he stares off in the distance at your brothers practicing football.

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>>739555499
Finally, a response, “No, I’m watching your brothers practice. I can barely see them from here, are you done yet?”
“No dad, can you push me on the swing?” I asked.
“They have the bench swings, you don’t need my help. Just go sit down on it and swing, I’ll be right here.” He told me, as the incredible colors of the evening sky began to dissipate and transition from sunset to twilight.
I ran to the swings, and I moved my feet like I had seen the other kids do, but the swing would not move. I shook the chains fixing the swing to the frame of the swing set and moved my legs in and out to try and facilitate movement to no avail. I once again asked my father for assistance for I wanted to swing. He acquiesced to my request, and he picked me up. He put me into the swing for smaller children, the one with three holes which prevented children from falling out of it.
He said to me, “You might be too small for the other swings right now, it’s okay. You can still use this one.” And he began to push me. He started pushing me a little bit higher every time I returned to the starting point. It was incredible, I could hear the air whooshing by my ears, my ears tingled in the chilly air, I was having too much fun.

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>>739555096
>>739555234
>>739555312
>>739555385
>>739555425
>>739555474
>>739555499
imagine being autistic enough to have this many Pepe files saved.

>>739553368
>>739554016
That's pretty sick. I can somehow relate to your story; not even close to being that hardcore, though.

My brother and I have different fathers too. He's 4 years older than me, and for some fucking reason I never understood, my dad was always way more strict to him, and actually used to beat the living shit out of him when he misbehaved. On the contrary, my dad loves me more than anything in the world, and never laid a finger on me, no matter what.

Anyways, my dad changed a lot through the years and now that we're all adults, it seems there are no hard feeling between him and my brother, but the injustice my bro suffered still bothers me.

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>>739555608
>>739555499
>>739555643
“Higher, higher!” I pleaded, “Push me higher!” And he did. The swing would carry me forward and up into the air until the swing’s arc reached its zenith and back down toward my father at its nadir where I would feel his strong hand catch the swing. He would then send me back into the air. The thrill of the swing did not dissipate one bit until we heard sustained whistles.

i'm too scared to take the next step

>>739534620
>young
>dad raging alcoholic with severe borderline
>beat mom
>divorce
>mom has full custody but decide to stay with him because he was very manipulative
>tells me mom cheated on him and does drugs (she did neither)
>walk in the garage to him trying to kill himself with truck exhaust
>didn't understand that til later

>fast forward some
>dad gets girlfriend
>she doesn't have a job
>within a week i watch out of my bedroom window as my dad lifts this woman by her throat for not having a job
>still too young to understand

>fast forward a little more
>im probably 12 around this time
>granny (my dad's mom) that lives in canada comes down to visit for christmas
>dad tries to get me to eat some ham
>i dont like ham
>he gets angry
>granny tries to defend me by saying "dont let the boy eat something he doesn't want to eat"
>my seventy something year old granny got hit by a barstool that day by her own son

>fast forward
>im 16
>dad showing be how to change oil
>i cant pull the oil filter off
>he calls me an idiot
>buck up to him
> say something along the lines of "you're a coward who only picks on women and children"
>he pushes me to the ground and almost gouges my eye out with the oil filter tool
>"i could kill you right now little bitch"
>goes on about how he wishes he never had me and i was a rape child

still remember it like yesterday. finally got the common sense to move in with mom that day. its been almost 6 years since ive seen him

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>>739555699
I ran to the swings, and I moved my feet like I had seen the other kids do, but the swing would not move. I shook the chains fixing the swing to the frame of the swing set and moved my legs in and out to try and facilitate movement to no avail. I once again asked my father for assistance for I wanted to swing. He acquiesced to my request, and he picked me up. He put me into the swing for smaller children, the one with three holes which prevented children from falling out of it.
He said to me, “You might be too small for the other swings right now, it’s okay. You can still use this one.” And he began to push me. He started pushing me a little bit higher every time I returned to the starting point. It was incredible, I could hear the air whooshing by my ears, my ears tingled in the chilly air, I was having too much fun.
“Higher, higher!” I pleaded, “Push me higher!” And he did. The swing would carry me forward and up into the air until the swing’s arc reached its zenith and back down toward my father at its nadir where I would feel his strong hand catch the swing. He would then send me back into the air. The thrill of the swing did not dissipate one bit until we heard sustained whistles.
“One second, I’ll be right back. I think practice is over. I’ll pull the van around and come get you, okay? I will be able to see you from the field and make sure nothing happens. Don’t worry.”

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>>739555930
I did not worry, and I sat relaxed in the swing while I watched my father amble toward the practice field. I was immediately beneath a light, and he could very easily see me. As my father’s figure blended with the shapes of all of the older boys and parents I lost track of him, but I did not worry because my father would soon be pulling up into the playground parking lot and he would place me inside of the warm minivan and we would all be going home.
I watched from afar as everyone loaded their items and selves into their respective vehicles and the number of people remaining at the practice field dwindled. Still, I did not worry, my father said he would be right back to get me, everything was going to be okay. I looked forward and saw some cars drive down the street, and I realized practice was over and everybody was going home now. Good, I would soon be reunited with my father and brothers, and we could go home to eat dinner. The night was dark save for the tall, metal light post projecting its beams upon the playground. I could see the headlights of the cars leaving the park, one by one, as they passed the turn off into the playground. I still did not worry, I had no reason to be worried, father said he was coming back soon. I looked around, but did not see my father or my brothers. I looked forward and caught a glimpse of what I thought was the minivan, but it continued past the playground and did not come for me.
I grew doubtful, was it my family’s minivan? Was it not? Surely it wasn’t, my father would come get me. He said he would. But it did look like our minivan, I think, I’m not that sure, I didn’t get a good look at it as it passed by. I continued to look forward, expecting to see the minivan turn the corner at any moment.

>>739555747
I cannot say I would ever hate anyone, but I hate my father. He destroyed my entire family and the reason why Jeb's mom died is because our dad never managed to feed her enough.

I didn't shed a goddamn tear when he died in the early seventies, if I remember correctly.

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>>739555989
Eventually no more cars were passing the field, not even the occasional passerby as it was not a main thoroughfare through town. I started to wonder what was taking so long, everybody else had left the park, maybe something happened to my brothers and it was holding up my father. Sure, that was it, something was preventing them from leaving the practice field to come get me. That was the reason I was still in the swing. Since that was the reason I decided I should try to finagle my way out of the swing and meet my father at his parking spot.
I placed my hands on the sides of the swing and pushed myself up, however I could not lift my feet up high enough to step on the swing and get out of it. I tried to pull myself up using the chains, but I could not pull myself high enough. “I can’t possibly be stuck in this swing,” I thought to myself. I tried to lean forward far enough to just fall out of the swing, but my center of gravity was not high enough to do so; I tried leaning backward as well. After a few minutes of struggling I realized the futility of trying to evacuate this swing by my own power and gave up. I looked around, I still did not see my father or brothers.
“Where could they be? Why haven’t they left the field yet? It’s getting colder, I’m stuck in a swing.” My doubt gave way to fear, “What if they are no longer at the field? What if the minivan that I saw was them? What if they forgot me? How could they forget me? Surely one of my brothers would have noticed that I was not there with them, they knew I was there when we came here.” And the bright lights that were once projected over the fields and playground suddenly terminated; I could hear the flow of power stop along with the lights. I was stuck in a swing designed for my safety in the cold darkness with nobody around to help me.

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>>739556104
My fear transitioned to terror. The helplessness of my situation was known to me, and me alone. It hit me at this time that I was the only person at this park right now, and I was stuck. I started to scream.
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I should have watched practice! Please! Dad! I’m sorry! Please come get me! Dad, where are you? Anybody? Please! I’m stuck, I can’t get out of here, I’m cold,” and tears welled up in my eyes. This was not an enjoyable solitude, I wailed and screamed, hoping anyone would come help me. It appeared the entire town was silent except for my screams, and yet everybody could hear me through the silence. My cries were met with apathy, the universe revealed itself that night as cruel and uncaring, cold, and indifferent. Then, suddenly, I heard something. It was a voice, someone in the cold, dark night who could help me out of this precarious predicament. The voice belonged to my school mate’s mother; his father joined her. The man said something I could not discern over my own screams, and I quieted down to hear them speak.
“Oh shut up. He’s stuck there in the swing. Where are your parents?”
“My dad went to get my brothers from practice. He is up at the other end of the park.”
“Oh, honey, there’s nobody else here except for us. The lights are off. Can you get yourself out of the swing?”
“No, I can’t! I’ve been trying but I can’t get it to work.”
“Ha, ha, ha” the man guffawed. “Now that’s rich. See, I’m not the only one.”
The mother sighed, “We can’t help you. You’re going to have to do it yourself. You must do it yourself. Clearly nobody else is going to help you and you need to learn this now” she told me.
Headlights appeared at the end of the path and they hurried towards us. The screaming of the engine died down, and dust blew in our collective direction.

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>>739553491
>Be 9
>A giant qr code
>Traumatized
You're a huge pussy anon

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>>739556169
>last fucking one

The driver side door swung open, and the silhouette of an enraged man advanced in front of the headlights toward us.
“What are you doing?” He screamed. “That’s my son, you stay away from him.”
“Ha, ha, ha, you’re going to leave him here alone in the dark and then pretend you care about him? I could use a friend like you, we can let our kids alone together” my classmate’s father said.
“Ugh, both of you.” She turned to my father, “How could you do this? I’m used to it with him, but you live here too and you do this to your son? Why? How?” The mother queried.
“I didn’t leave him alone. I told him I would be back and here I am. I don’t neglect my kids. Don’t talk to me that way.”
“Sure you don’t buddy. Let’s go grab a beer, what are you doing tomorrow night?”
“Fuck off, I’ve got nothing to say to you” my father told the man. “You don’t get to talk to me that way, maybe my wife, but never you. You don’t know me and you don’t know my family.” He picked me up and set me on my feet, “Get in the god damn car, now” and I scurried hurriedly into the back of the minivan, it was warm and dark.
The adults said some more stuff but I could not hear them, my father got back in the minivan and he quickly drove away from the park. He may not have hit the brakes on the entire drive home because we got there quicker than ever. “Go inside and go to bed. Don’t make me tell you again.” I hopped out of the vehicle, ran up the stairs and into the house to my bedroom. I laid in bed with my clothes on, covered myself with my blanket, and just stared at the wall until I fell asleep.

>>739540376
OH TOP KEK

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I was molested by a married couple who lived near us. They were acquaintances of my parents. A lot of it is fuzzy, I don't think about those years much. When my parents found out they refused to involve the police or stop it from happening. When my grandparents found out they fought for and won custody of my sister and I. Things were great for a couple years until my grandfather passed away and my grandmother started needing more medical care. My parents convinced her to have us live with them again. My father beat the shit out of me the first night we were back and almost weekly after that. I moved out the day I turned 18. Never looked back.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=am_ANhhXAvg

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My mother would drive me half way around New Jersey while I was 12 so she could buy and smoke crack and make me drive home. Fuck her and fuck my father too.

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>>739555699
You wish your weeb ass could have this many Pepes saved.

>>739538441
>I'm asexual and transgender now.
and they try to say it's not a mental illness

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>>739555608
That is a slightly different story of when Atlantic City came to play my town that year. I had a toy in my hands and I went to the park, and the niglets from Atlantic City told me to give up my toy. I ran away from them but someone talked me. The niglets followed and surrounded me, expecting a beating I curled up into a ball, holding my toy. My butt felt cold all of a sudden, then there was a severe pain and I lunged forward to try and escape it. The niglets took the toy from my hands and laughed at me.

I laid on the ground crying for a while, eventually I got up, and there was a man nearby. I walked over to him to try and let him know something happened, not that I knew what it was, and he kept telling me to fuck off. Eventually some cops walked over and the guy split, one of the cops followed him.

They never caught him, and I thought I sharted moments later but there was no brown stain in my underpants and I didn't understand why.

tl;dr, childhood = trauma

although i have good memories of preschool, i was bullied all through school. i was bullied in elementary school because i was the smallest, weakest boy. it's not like i didn't run and play baseball like the rest of them, i did, but i didn't get fat or tall or muscular like everyone else. then i started coming late to class. it really got bad in the third grade; i remember Lance Gentry making bets with the other students about how many minutes late I would be. couldn't really explain what happened, I was being driven to school by my parents at the time, but it never got better--being late is a problem that has followed me into adult life and is a plague upon my career, my personal life, and my relationships. the tardiness, the bullying, and the lack of interest in the school work (which i found disappointingly easy until college) added up. years later i would be told that this is likely when my depression began, in the third or fourth grade of elementary school--i first sought treatment in my twenties. at one point, my family nearly brought suit against the school after counseling brought out evidence the school faculty were complicit in the pecking order. in my fifth grade year they finally came up with a school program to enslave older students as 'playground counselors' for younger students; i wasn't selected as one of them. i continued to be bulled, off school grounds. then jr. high, when i actually made one real, lasting friend (who i haven't spoken to in years now), and got bullied. in jr. high the escalated the violence situation of the situation, as well as the complicity of the adults in a system of suppressing children--we'll get back to that--while at the same time i began to associate myself with fringe individuals and groups, not that i had ever been associated with any popular clique. i picked up an odd habit, carrying all my books in my bag at once--because i hated to hang out in the locker area (the site of COMMENT TOO LONG

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>>739557046
My dad got mad at me for losing my toy, I've never told him what happened.

>>739556882
Kek. But, seriously, early sexual experiences fuck your sexuality up, for some reason.

>>739557046
doing gods work. i pray for your leisure time when i can repay the favor you have laid before us.

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>>739557252
I, uh, do my best anon.

Dad sick from Alzheimer's and Parkinson's disease from when I wasn't 7 until I was 22. He lived with us at home and my mom took care of him 24/7. Got really into Everquest and video games because with the dimensia he could never be left home alone.

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I grew up without affection from either of my parents or my brothers. I am a shell of a person that struggles to reintegrate the different facets of my personality.

>>739556215
That was the gayest, longest story I have ever heard. But it was very descriptive and well written. If you are more creative and less gay you could be a really good writer. Ic an't believe you wrote so much about such a gay story.

>TLDR become a writer and stop being such a whiny fag

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>>739557655
Do you have any suggestions for not being such a faggot?

>>739557461
goddammit im so jelly rn

>>739534620
Well Im posting the story of this kid at my school.
Is Jewish
Staunch Republican and basically spends his time sucking Trumps cock
Pretty mush friendless
Delusional
Total fag has disgusting lisp
Always asking questions in class to sate his literal OCD
Also really likes fat girls

Take pity on him and not be a total ass to him
Year later I basically don't talk to him at all
Two years after I meet him semi try to befriend him
Doesnt work out
Fast foward a few monthes and he gets a girlfriend who is a total hoe but he loves her and was geniunly happy
Within a week she cheats on him but he forgives her since he thought she was blackout drunk when she was really only stoned
A week later this Hispanic kid fucks her in the bathroom and she sucks his dick
This is all caught and random haitans phone camera
Her infidelity is caught on camera and shared with the entire school
People start calling him cuck and he enters deep depression
will continue later sorry about shit quality im retarded and not used to being organized

>>739557655
It's also only 7 pages in Microsoft Word. Times New Roman 12pt, single spaced of course.

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>>739557862
>greentext
>greenhorn
>newfag get out

>>739557655
Also all of my stories are about being a massive failure, because that's what I am and that's what I know.

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>>739557761
Why would that make you jelly?

>>739554796
i'm listening anon. bpd here with ya. dad was a mentally ill drunk who beat my mom and his own mom and also made me hate myself.

best thing to do is just get away from 'em. easier said than done, but i havent seen my dad in almost 6 years and i feel better. still pretty out of touch with reality though

>>739558140
i wish to be THIS based one day. my training is never complete

>>739558303
Become a drug addict or an alcoholic and you can live the based life, anon. It worked for me, then I quit the drugs and only drink whiskey on occasion.

Most except for like one or two stories on here was no real trauma:
>Anxious as fuck
>Depression all of a sudden when I was in 5th grade
>Can't go to school without severe crippling anxiety
>A situation gets set up where I can do my work in the principals office
>One day on my birthday something weird happens
>My mom goes to drop me off
>The principal and the assistant principle drag me away from my mom
>They drag me into the principals office and pull my mom away from me
>I'm shouting screaming and crying
>The principal tackles my 12 year old body to the ground and breaks/bruises my arm
>They talk nonchalantly as it happens
>The only way I can think to get out of this situation is threaten to kill myself
>Ambulance comes for me at school on my birthday
>My arm hurts
>I get put in the mental ward on my birthday and get out on the same day
>We were going to sue the school but my mom was a single mother

That same year
>Go to the dentists
>Routine teach cleaning
>My mom asks the dentists if they can wiggle out a loose tooth
>They say sure but ask my Mom to leave the room
>Whatever
>All of a sudden when my Mom leaves the atmosphere in the room changes
>A creepy dentist who looked evil as fuck comes in the room with this other guy
>Imagine the creepiest, palest most maniacal people you could think of
>They held me down and smiled these creepy smiles with a light in my face
>Turns out my tooth was not as loose as they thought
>They took a tool and pried my tooth from me
>I felt every nerve rip from my head strand my strand
>They seemed to get some sort of sick pleasure out of it
>I start bleeding every where
>They give me a guaze pack and send me on the way
>I come into the waiting room and I am bleeding everywhere crying like fuck
>My mom asked what happened freaking out
>We were gonna sue for it but no lawyers would take our case
>That chain of dentists "small smiles dentistry ended up being shut down for torturing kids all across the country

>>739558507
still do drugs and love them.
cut back on the alcohol to save the liver
turns out i'm fucked either way
w/e

>>739554395
idk, i think thats normal to do weird shit like that when you're that age. me and my buddy used to hide in the bathroom and look at each others asses because we thought it was hilarious

>>739558631

Bad things happened when I did hard drugs! I've also smoked my share of BZ.

I stick to liquor for a reason, whiskey is the thinkin' man's drink.

>>739558773
whiskey is fav drink always. that will never change

>>739550766

sleep paralysis.

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>>739558924
Scotch when I'm up, bourbon when I'm down.

Incidentally, I'm not sure if the FBI is incredibly incompetent or I managed to make them think I was innocent the entire time.

I wish someone cared.

>>739559153
/b/ simultaneously cares and doesn't at the same time.

>>739559123
nazca lines never lie. lul i like u

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>parents divorce when i was 2.
>Move several times till im about 6.
>Mostly normal kid stuff till i was 12.
>Move again to my dads new girlfriend.
>Turns out shes and addict and a psycho.
>Her son is neglected most the time and has fits of rage alot, we sometimes get along but rarely.
>He "Doesn't know his strength" bullys and beats me up a few times a week.
>Dad's gf screams and yells at me and her son on a daily basis.
>Constantly criticized for any and all things.
>My dad doesn't see what happens, thinks im playing games with him.
>He also gets upset and sometimes yells at me.
>Lock myself in my room most days to survive.
>Start being antisocial, reclusive.
>Have many "Family Conversations" to either shame me for something me or the son did or to single me out for something the son did but i get in trouble for, no one believes me though not my fault most times.
>Hear that cutting and harming yourself distracts you and helps get you by.
>Did that till i was about 18/19.
>Also learn faking emotions keeps people from finding anything wrong with me.
>"Attempt" Suicide. More or less just open my window out to the roof and got ready to jump but didn't.

>After 4 years, now 16.
>Dad has had enough, finds out what's been happening to me.
>Move back at his mother's for the time being.
>Dad trys to get me to tell him what happened to me, plays the "You tell me a secret, I tell a secret."
>Find out his gf had an abortion and i wouldn't want to be bothered a baby, I've always wanted to have a little sibling.
>Tell him i thought about running away many times, seems not to care.
>He tells me she did blow, also that he's sorry it took him 4 years to realize what was happening to me.
>Has no idea what actually happened to me besides her being "Strict" and "Raising her voice alot".
>Lie to him and tell him its ok and that i forgive him still love him.

Thats what i consider my childhood, there is more if you want to know my teens till young adult.

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>>739559259
Frankly I'm amazed that some ranchers in Colorado actually did that. I assume they wanted someone to randomly find it on google maps, and I was that lucky guy.

>>739542474
That's fucking hilarious, mate.

>>739557060
much unpleasantness, bullying, getting things stolen from you, etc); my bag was heavy, but I could run from class to class and be there first and alone and safe for a few minutes, most of the time. sometimes i got hung up in the hallway by bullies, sometimes even talking to a friend, but i wasn't late often during those years as i recall; i still got rides to school most days. i began to wear dark-colored clothing; i began to wear it every day. no one was gothic, we hardly knew what it was yet (fashions reach the midwest about six years after you see them on tv). then columbine happened, and adults began to see disaffected children as enemies of the public. i was pulled out of english class one day--one the one day we're having this cafe-style poetry reading event (we wrote the poems as homework)--to answer questions like "Do you have any violent intentions toward your fellow students or any of the teachers here?" i told the vice principal that no, i did not, and why would he be asking? apparently he heard a rumor that i'd said something "off color" about the situation; i'm not sure which color it was but apparently not our school's blue and "gold" (yellow, cheapskates, it's yellow, and highlighter yellow at that). he was holding a list of all my friends and associates. fortunately, all misery comes to an end, and next was high school, where i was bullied for a time--it came to an end, abruptly, when i stood up for myself, loudly, physically, and in front of many spectators. bullies are a cowardly lot. the biggest change was becoming "officially" goth, and back to being late on a regular basis. it wasn't the best of times, nor the worst of times, but i do contemplate burning my hometown to the ground and salting the earth where it once lay from time to time. i'd let the people escape; i'm no monster, they'd be free to settle elsewhere--it might even do them some good to get outside.

I only had one real trauma, other than the usual getting busted masturbating while on the computer, up late when I should be asleep, and trying to make out staticy tits (and watching real tits once my dad paid a guy for the row of 5 in-line filters that gave us HBO, Cinemax, Showtime, etc.)
>1992
>6 years old
>up late
>had a My Buddy Doll in my room
>Child's Play set to come on on 17 (Cinemax, or was it Showtime)
>sounded fun
>wanted to watch
>glee turned to fear
>fear turned to horror
>Good Buddy
>My Buddy
>I freaked out
>turned off the TV
>ran to my room
>slowly reached for the My Buddy Doll
>carefully creep to the basement stairs
>barely open the basement door
>chuck the doll into the abyss and slam the door
>I hid in my room
>every sound was too loud
>stayed awake thinking the doll would kill me
>mom came to my room to wake me up for school
>I was hiding under my blanket
>I didn't want to leave the safety
>forced to go to school with absolutely no sleep for the next couple of day
>afraid the doll would kill me as I slept

>>739558258
Yeah, my sympathy that someone who was supposed to care for you did that, its rough.

>>739559435
Chucky isn't Freddie Krueger you fucking faggot.

>>739559485
my sympathy to you*

>>739554016

72 on /b/...sure kid.

>>739534620
> Be me 3-4 years old.
> Live with mother and father, they do not get along, abuse between.
> Move about 5 hours away up North.
> Start school at some catholic school for like 2 years there
> My mom meets a guy, he pretty much raises me, never see my father, but see his mother (my grandmother) often.
> The guy who's raising me starts getting anger issues and experiencing Bi Polar but not taking medications, he has a lot of weapons to end lives. mother too scared to leave because of that
> Starts getting abusive and all the fun we had goes to shit
> Im around 10 and I become really nerdy, masturbate a lot, and actually very intelligent
> Just before I turn 12, he dies out of nowhere, ruined my life
> Real dad moves up to my city to be with me
> Starts caring for me and shit now, getting me things and being around me often
> ISNT ABUSIVE?
> Still with my mom, they get along but aren't together
> Move to new school, i'm a different person
> Deal with drama and shit every day, near suicidal
> Mom gets new job, suddenly, everything is good
> be me, 15, highschool start
> End up getting the shit beat out of me for idk what, break arm
> 17 I finally lose virginity to a girl who I am with for 3 years, for those years it's pretty much shit, she hit me and used to manipulate me hard, but I got over her.
> 22 and my childhood is still confusing to me

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>>739559435

>>739536613
Sorry, Anon.

>Parents divorced at 8 or 9
>left with military father
>he tells me from now on I have to take take of my two younger siblings, tries to show me to cook kraft mac and cheese
>expects me to do all the housework too
>"anon, you have to be the man of the house now."
>THEN WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO BE
>get beaten every day because I can't do it, get angry at siblings because they mess stuff up. big shit show
>he takes us over to random womens' houses all the time, brings women home all the time at night and beats us if we get out of bed
>tries to force me into military, makes me do JROTC, boy scouts, etc
>any time I'm not feeling good or I have a problem at school: "don't worry when you join the army they will straighten you out"
>no social or emotional skills
>16 finally tell my father I'm not joining the military
>tells me he won't each me to drive (just did the high school driver's ed thing and got my permit)
>fist fights start again
>call cops, but they say I have no witnesses, etc. He's a freemason and was in some cop fraternity thing
>have to run away from home

>>739559529
Try telling that to a 6 year old. I look at horror movie now and either enjoy them, like Kubrick and Hitchcock, laugh at thinks like hostel and Final Destination, or think about improvements in things like SAW.

>>739559844
>improvements in things like SAW
The only way to improve SAW is to murder the director's mother before he is born.

>>739559844
Nigga I'm still afraid of clowns and spiders. Fuck IT, fuck Stephen King, fuck everything.

>>739551405
Sounds like a fucking genius to me, tbqh.

>>739559953
Can't change the past, yet. Although most of those traps could easily have been improved upon.

>>739537298
i cant believe how much this made me laugh dude

Not a trauma but I feel this fucked me up good and now I idk
>be me
>be like 8-10 don't remember
>have this one friend in school
>every time after school ingo to his house and we dry hump each other
>went on for about 1 year
>dry hump
>suck dick through pants
I'm not gay. I don't know why we did It. Friend was male btw same age as me


>do all that dry humping stuff but with my female cousin 2 years later
Should I just end my life /b?

I was born to a demon of a man and mentally challenged mother, abused in every sense of the word, tried to protect her, my brothers were spared. Was placed in foster home and adopted by Aunt and uncle. Uncle molest me, but I'm the one who gets blamed. Had to move cause was severely bullied in school. Bio parents killed themselves, ran away from uncles house and year later hit and crippled by falling ice.

I'm ready to fucking die

>>739560263
you're here for a reason, motherfucker. just liek me

>>739559985
IT is a different thing for me. Didn't watch it until I was older. I had a hatred for clowns. Blame Bozo. Was on his show once, my damn numder was called for the fucking buckets. Then they said, "Oh, I meant this one." Fuck you Bozo, I practiced for weeks when my mom said me and my sis were going. For fucking WEEKS! But noooo, it was that fucking blond bitch with the pigtails in front of me whose mother was probably fucking the producer. Fucking asshole of a god damn clown. Glad that Bozo died. I hope it was excruciating. Fucking clowns......

>>739560490
Doesn't mean I can't plan on how I'm going to die.
No one here's for a reason, no special plan or focus.

>>739534620
i saw one of my friends gunned down when i was 10. when i was 11 i saw my neighbor get beaten to death with an ice scraper. And lastly when i was 12 i was "raped" by a female crackhead who thought i was good enough for a toss in the hay. Baltimore man.

>>739544373
Well. Your dad and stepdad needs to be fucked up by your sadistic desires

Jerked my cousin off once when I was 12... he was 10.... we don't talk about it (Both dudes)

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>>739560630
WTF

Watches at 0 $?

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>>739551350
Yeah just tell him he's a piece of shit and the only reason you didn't hit him is because you pussied out because you're a faggot who (not so) secretly loved it when daddy hit him.

>>739560677
surely not. but doesn't mean you can't enjoy while it lasts

>>739541573
i love being a newfag because of shit like this

Secretly killed my friends frogs for no reason also
Molested my friends 7yo sister when I was around 13

>be me
>be in second grade
>best friends with this other kid
>only friend
> one day on the way to school i hear he drowned
>ripmyonlyfriend.jpeg


Fucking sucked...

>>739541573
rip days like these

>>739561200
Don't see how that is traumatic for you.

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>>739542290
kek. that reminded me of something similar

>be ~6
>in the bathroom
>for some fucking reason I can't remember, I decide to poo on the floor
>next day mom discovers the turd on the floor
>"anon, was it you?"
>mfw
>"Not me. It was probably the cat"
>"hmm..."

She didn't buy it.

>>739551350
so? If you don't teach him he will grow up just an average retard like his dad.

Tell him how when he destroyed the vase it felt like you lost your friend again, that even though the vase is just like another and ultimately worthless, it made you sad and angry - and you aren't mad at him, it was just a mistake. Also tell him it doesn't matter you still have your friend in your memories.

At least that's what I would do with my kids, I want them to grow up as wise as possible

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>Haven't had any friends or love when was a child
>Neither when was a teenager
>Neither when was and still an adult
>Always tell myself people try to befriend me but i am anti social
>I am not
>No one approachs me and those who did ran away from once they got near enough

I once had to take my mums BMW to school instead of the Rolls Royce.

Tough life, I know.

>>739561085
Not to be negative I'm currently bed bound in agony just from moving my bad spine wrong.
I don't want to live

>be 6
>get raped

I don't remember how old I was, but my uncle is only 7 years or so older than me. One night when I was sleeping in the upper bunk from him somehow he called me down. Peepee touch, and he thought he tough me how to masturbate. I went back up the ladder to my bunk and continued to hump the pillows the way I always did and he asked if I was using the technique he had taught me.
I remember it most because I thought "no, I'm doing my usual thing but, I guess I don't have to try and not wake you up with it anymore."
After that I don't think we ever slept in the same room again so idk what happened, if my grandparents found out or what.

Honestly the situation doesn't bother me that much, I just want to know if they found out and if so, how.

>9 years old
>middle income town
>make friends with neighbor kid for awhile
>parents treat him like shit
>six siblings
>catholic family breeding like rabbits
>black sheeped
>convince parents to help him out, mother agrees
>give him food when his parents dont give him any/enough
>give him a coat cause his parents wont buy him one
>replace his socks
>in the summer spend time together
>invite him to play the new xbox that just came out, play halo+halo 2 on it
>fast forward, randomly playing on his trampoline
>throws me into basket post next to it, bump on head still recognizable on me today
>climb giant tree in his yard with him, starts shaking branches when I go to them as a joke
>one day enter his barn with him, forget why
>locks me in
>have to jump out second floor cause he just fucking left
>fast forward a bit again
>randomly wont let me cross the street, trying to push me back into the road when I try to go home
>mother comes to seperate us before theres more of a dispute
>realize he did all of this on purpose just to be hurtful

This was what started my distrust in people, the first time I ever felt betrayal and anger in my entire life, truthfully. I now recognize he is a sociopath, and is the only reason I know im not one cause I actually know what a sociopath is. He also tore apart frogs and tortured his cats, but I didn't realize that cat thing until much later.

>>739562641
remembering the best time of your life is the best advice anyone could give. just try to re-live that moment through other people. pass on what you've "learned" to someone else so maybe they would feel similar. just a thought

>be me
>around 10 to 12
>never sleep in room
>sleep on couch
>wake up for school
>mother yells at me saying my face is ugly
>slaps me
>bitch drives me to school
>i start to breath heavily
>whore says that im breathing like a retard
>go on with my day
i hate her to this day she ever see me again that dumb whore

>>739562987
you should just do something about it, if you think its bad for you think if he did it to someone else. If he was gonna do it he did it awhile ago in terms of uploading, take him down for it.

>>739562987
expose thine chesticles or get the fuck out-icles

i feel talented yet lonesome
adventuresome yet sheltered
bewildered yet beset
by everything against nothing
i feel everything and nothing
yet i don't feel the need to tell everybody about it
a difference is here
deal with it

>>739563720
edgy, read it in high school?

>>739563957
any high schoolers feel free. i won't know

>>739563957
nu-edge highschool.

>>739564184
post nu-edge if you wanna get technical but niggers will make shit up anyways

>>739564415
did i kill the thread with my edginess? lmao nu /b/ moar like it

I saw my mum grab my sister by the hair and throw her against the wall once.

She had really bad anger issues and would beat my ass for no reason. My grandparents would try to help but my mom was always just so angry.

Shes calmed down now but my siblings and i never talk about it

>>739565198
nice trai but /b/ as u knew it is still dead and there is no reviving it. i revel in your constant smattering of approval and cockworship

>>739544857
same. i use to fool around with my cousin but never actually had sex. hoping one day it will happen now that im not such a pussy

>>739536613
That sucks bro..keep on keeping on you gonna make it

>>739534620
I traumatized my sister by showing her this video when she was 3 years old:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfZItov1BUo

>>384601963
Not quite childhood but-
>18 years old
>living with my parents, come from a poor ish family
>gf (now my wife) lives across the country
>scrounge up money to move her down here
>she's my second relationship, first and only person I've boned
>things are going alright but she has a lot of mental issues (I knew about this going in)
>her mom died giving birth and her dad handled it really poorly (molested her once, neglected her after that) so she's got layers of fucked up shit with giving birth and babies
>she's getting worse by the day, my home life isn't great so that makes things worse
>at this point she's obsessed with having a kid
>we argue about it everyday
>I'm barely keeping my neck above water with a part time job, and we still live with my mom, so I say no
>one day she gives me an ultimatum
>I can either knock her up
>or she kills herself
>I get a knot in my gut
>keep trying to argue, she won't budge
>I'm depressed and have low confidence, so I feel like it's my fault
>I say okay
>first time fucking without a condom, would've felt great if I didn't feel so bad
>finish pretty fast, not used to the sensation
>she plays around with my cum for a second, asks if we can do it again later since she didn't get to cum
>feel like shit

>>739551310
this might seem stupid or odd but hey
I love you, /b/ro
all of us /b/tards, we're here for you

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pic unrelated
>be me
>12
>move to next state over
>new school no friends
>abusive drunk stepdad (name is kelly)
>only abuses me my mother helps because they are both drunks
>year later outside enjoying fire place
>step on nail from firewood
>go inside
>kelly yells at me calling me retarded
>i say something like fuck you idk
>storms to bedroom slams door shut
>pissed so i knocked over trash can
>baked beans everywhere
>take shower then get out
>kelly standing there yelling a faggot
>mother "takes" my side
>says pack your bags we are leaving
>fuck yes
>i pack everything she screams at me we can come back later
>i pack everything
>bitch yells no i don't care about you anon i want to stay here
>pissed
>go back to bed and cry myself to sleep
they are still together and i hate their guts to this day

>Love animals
>Dad was into hunting
>Family Hunting Trip
>Shoot deer
>Slightly miss so it slowly dies

>>739545754
tell your sister story

>>739561200
oh nice you did the same thing other anons are complaining about when they were kids and now you want to be part of a group setting when in reality you deserve nothing

>>739551310
feels bad mang
she sound like a bitch so don't blame yourself

>>739537871
idiot

>Lived with my Grandmother and her two sons.
>Very strict religious upbringing.
>My 2 uncles used to beat the shit out of me all the time.
>If I broke any of the house rules, I'd be locked in a coffin that got submerged in the swamp behind the house.
>It had an air hose, but no light or anything.
>Just me and the darkness.
>Sometimes I was down there for 2 weeks.
>Older, meaner uncle killed my best friend
>Also killed my Dad, and mom.
>Finally got free when I was around 20, and high tailed it out of there.
That was 10 years ago. But I know they're out there looking for me. When they find me they're going to take me back.

>>739566787

> The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

>>739562987
legit you should find him and fuck him up, hes an old pedophile who cares. hes been victimizing other girls your whole life and deserves to suffer