Feels/chill thread What's on your mind anon?

>>739439853
There's no apparent reason that I exist solely within myself. I refuse to believe it. It cannot be true because it's entirely illogical. I personally believe that I'm not conscious. It's something greater than that, it controls all those in an area. Such as how towns are so similar, and the outliers eventually corrupt to the majority.

meth head murder

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Why doesn't she love me back?

>>739439853
BLOW

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>>739440910
I don't know, anon

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>>739440980
That picture is really nice. I might steal that for my phone wallpaper in the future

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>>739441082
Keep posting. You have some cool shit

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When I start college in the fall I'm gonna make myself universally hated and gossipped about just like I have through my whole life

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>>739441236

>>739441288
Why do you think that?

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>>739441298
That's all I have:(

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>>739440910
The reason doesnt matter friend
I know they say theres other fish in the sea, and that its hard when she was your ocean.
But no matter how good the water feels, dont let yourself drown
You can be your own ocean

>>739441335
It's happened everywhere else I've been, I'm either known as a dickhead and openly despised by everyone or as a borderline autistic awkward white kid when I try to be nicer and force myself to show interest in what people say

>>739441432
That's completely fine. I'm kind of interested in why most of them are Chinese themed

>>739441503
I'd much rather her be my ocean

>>739440366
I wouldn't say you are unconscious just more conscious then most.

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>>739441432
I loved these images, thank you anon.
Whats eating you tonight?

>>739441644
Her.

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>>739440910
I'm feeling the same way anon. I've been in love with this girl for 2 years and whenever we seem to get closest she pushes me far back. It's a dark place... Why doesn't she love me too man?

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>>739441575
That sounds bad, dude. I know this sounds really cheesy, but try to not worry about what other people think. You're going to college to start your career. As long as you make a few friends, you should be alright :)

>>739441615
I know, i miss my ocean
But id rather be alone or dead then drowning in nothing
I hope someday you can learn to forget, you deserve happiness

>>739441683
I know the feeling all to well
May i ask what happened??

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>>739441683
Elaborate.

>>739441709
Yeah, she always tells me she loves me but then she pushes me away and says we can't be together and then just says she never loves me but then just contradicts herself all over again..I sincerely don't understand why people can't just simply love

>>739439853

I'm worried about people still believing in impossible things just because the dogma they adhere to supports it. I'm not too concerned, I estimate I have 15 years more to live so I won't suffer. My kids though... Really concerned for them

>>739441768
Thanks anon

>>739439853
Lonliness and fucking with myself over my first actual interview. Realized I've gotten 5 jobs without an actual one.

Better than I've been in a decade thanks to shrooms, but never having a connection with someone eats away at you.

>Can't make make emotional connections anymore
>Run as soon as I start enjoying someone's friendship/company
>Proceeds to make me feel like shit for running
>rinse and repeat

I mean, mediocre shit but still.

>>739440910
Well brother, just talk to her about it. Like if you have a nice understanding with her, talk to her about it. How old are you ?? How old is she ?

>>739441856
She sounds bipolar. Extreme highs and lows
I dated a girl who had similar habits
From experience i can say, just leave now. Itll be better for the both of you

>>739441856
I've helped her build up confidence and she always tells me that I am the best person to talk to. That I always have a way to make her feel better- but when I try to build on that to make myself feel better with her, she deliberately tries to deter me. I'm so lonely with and without her.

>>739441683
She tells me she loves me and yet never wants to be together. She always makes me feel bad for who I am and makes me feel bad because of the people I hang around with.. I always conform to what she wants but nowadays it just feels awful and when I think she's gone she always comes back..

>>739441900
We all must suffer but here, ive always felt less alone
Stay safe bro

>>739439853
this was the nicest thing I heard all day.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s15zTdcpDUIv

>>739442030
I guess so, you're right

>>739441967
Maybe..

>>739441967
It isn't that easy to leave. You cant help but just want her bad because you think maybe this time it'll work. You feel that jealousy when you see someone else try with that same person too like you weren't even worth a scrap of attention in the end. Can't be with or without.

I'm thinking about killing myself quite honestly. I hate everything and everyone and I know I'm a selfish bitch.

>>739442085
It was a little rocky but she makes a good point

>>739439853
I work too much, I drink too much, nobody knows I exist but god damnit I'm here.

>>739442085
That's really nice. Thanks for sharing

>>739442233
get drunk brah
that's what i do
it's fun
plus, if you get drunk often enough, you have the satisfaction of knowing you are still slowly killing yourself, but in a fun way

>>739439853
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eT8FxWFvUXY

>>739442057
<3

>>739442233
what's up man. Wanna chat about it? I've thought about it too.

>>739442165
But it won't work I guess. I hear a lot of people say that you choose who you love but if that's the case then why do I want her so bad?

So, i think i have fallen in love with a womam 10 years older than me. She has a daughter too. She makes me feel like I can actually be myself and live the life I want. I was together with a girl 1 year younger than me (25) for 7 years, and in the begining it was really good, but as the years passed I started to realize how different we were. And now I wonder if I want to go down that road again..

>>739442432
Exactly. Why do I want her so bad? You just don't choose, and life ain't fair like that. If you can move on, I salute you man. I wish I had that power

>>739442233
Yeah anon, talk to us

>>739442339
I'm 16 I can't require alcohol sadly

>>739442515
Damn it anon I want peace, what's on your mind tonight?

waiting on a 9 year old to turn 18 so i can fuck her

>>739442587
16 too

I've pretty much fucked over everyone in my area in my attempts at pleasing everyone. Now I have no friends around me. But am too much of a poorfag to move yet. That, and college won't hop off of my dick long enough to let me decide where I want to head.

I'm transgender, MtF
>inb4 become an hero
I know, that's the point of this post.

I've tried to suppress it and ignore it. "Leave it alone and it will go away." But that doesn't work. I know who I am and I have accepted that. It's just that no one else does. I'm so afraid to tell my mom, /b/, but I know that I have to. I just can't bring myself to do it.

>>739442165
I understand all too well. I was with bi polar girl for over a year.
I understand the jealousy and the torment.
But pergaps to her that is the case. You arent worth scrap to her, you mean little. But that is not to say that is your worth.
There is little you can do to change someones mind, but dont let that change your mind on how you view yourself.
You deserve happiness anon, youre worth so much more than scrap.
Happiness and companionship do not always go hand in hand.
But whatever the case, i hope you can find both in the future, you deserve it

>>739442564
What made you feel like this at such a young age?

>>739441288
I went through the same thing, i know it's sounds dumb but i read some self help book, especially around anxiety, I learnt some cool things, started to find some interests like lifting weights and hiking and started to find people who liked the same things I did, i refused to let negative thinking stop me from getting what I wanted and used positive imagery to imagine me getting what I wanted, I know this come off as a bit lame but it did work, I also stop caring what people thought of me becuase I really don't know what people think of me I just tried to work on my skills. Life is a lot better.

>>739442564
yea, you can get it. look for friends with fake ID
also don't go around saying you're 16 around here, people will tell you "underage gtfo" lol
also you can always raid moms/dads/grandma's/uncles/brothers/sisters liquor

>>739442085
Nihilism ))

>>739442233
I think about it everyday
Stay here first, maybe we can help

>>739442649
Thank you a bunch anon, I hope you feel better with what you're going through too. We should all be happy

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>>739439853
I wanna roam the stars ma nigga
ya feel me

>>739439853
Is just rather be dead. I'm sitting at my desk, and all I can think about is how I don't matter. After I'm done with my masters degree I am going to just kill myself. I don't care. There's no hope. Im just killing time.

GET HIGH YOU PIECE OF SHIT.

>>739442867
I'm a poorfag, donate

>>739442652
It was my 16th birthday today nobody decided to even text me happy birthday I mean no one texts me anyways and I guess it's a little selfish to ask for but I at least wanted somebody to realize instead of my mother.

>>739442564
I wanted to kill myself when I was 16 too. It doesnt matter what you decide. If you kill yourself young, people give you the benefit of the doubt: they say things like "he had so much potential.. what a tragedy". the alternative of growing old and people realizing that you wont reach your potential is equally as tragic. but I learned to like being miserable. i work hard all day everday and im tired and burned out but I'm proud. even if I've got nothing to show for it. life is weird. when you get older and you get a job and you get busy things have a way of changing and fading. i suggest you keep living but I dont blame you if you choose the former.

>>739442943
Diff. anon.

I would say "don't forget you have us!" But that's more of a threat than anything.

>>739442649
Fuck man i started crying you know this is some nice shit you said im just so weak today

>>739442943
Mothers, most of them, are a gift. She's a good mama. Also,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! you're only 16 but we won't tell. ;)

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>>739442801
feel u BIG time fam
born too soon
space pirate is my calling
mining asteroids in the red sector
rescuing rich family's bitches from ransom seekers
plundering corporate frigates for rare materials from distant quadrants
brooooooooo i feel you BIG time

>>739442943
HAPPY BIRTHDAY NIGGER )))

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>>739442943
HAHAHA! ON MY 16TH MY MOM FORGOT! DONT WORRY MAN!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY DUDE!!!!!!!!

>>739442943
Not trying to be a dick but, do you feel that you really need all those people who don't care about you?

>>739439853
Does sperm have consciousness?

>>739443059
Happy birthday baby anon <3

>>739442943
Happy birthday anon

>>739442985
People tell me that but it's just so lonely sometimes.

Talked to my fwb. She said she feels guilty about cheating on her bf. Wants to stop sleeping with me. Doesn't want to leave him.

>>739442643
I understand where you are
Secretly ive never felt right in my skin, ive never felt comfort being as i am.
Though i recently tried to trap i guess, wear girls clothes, and i had never felt so good about myself. Later i went to a psychologist and they think i may be transgender as well
But i understand what youre going through, ive experience all this in secret as my family would no doubt disown me.
So i wont tell them.
Ive decided for myself that it will just have to remain a part of me that no one can know about, ill take it to my grave
For me though its noy about being accepted, i never strove to be accepted by anyone. Its the idea that my families view of me will change. They will not see me the same, tgey will treat and speak to me differently, as if i was a stranger. So i wont, ill take it to the grave.
Im saying this in the hopes that maybe you can come to terms with doing the same. Maybe you can decide for yourself that your happiness is not something that must be accepted, rather something that just is and deserves to be. Weather you tell her or not, i wish you the best

>>739443072
I just want to have a small ship so I can go to life sustaining planets to see what direction evolution has taken on said planets
maybe i could document species as a paying job or some shit
i just wanna see some shit fam

>>739442789
Anytime anon, life is tough, dont go it alone

>>739443288
Yea I'm a weak person I want a least something even if it's "happy birthday" with nothing behinde it.It would make me happy and I would still be grateful.

>>739443054
Crying is hard, sorry it came to that
Youll be fine brother, its a necessity we all must live through

>>739439853


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8_ea-bgSBk&t=147s

Currently listening to this. I can't stand humanity despite being part of it, we're inherently unreliable and confusing things that destroy so many beautiful things because we're stupid.

So many people have let me down recently, in both big and small ways, and I honestly don't understand how some people can be so selfish and horrible to others. Going to be moving back somewhere for school to live with one of the only people who hasn't royally fucked me over, but I really hope I'm able to find decent people soon, maybe even a girl who actually cares about being smart and independent while still understanding the concept of loyalty, but I don't know if I'll ever find that.

>>739441503
That's awesome anon.
Thanks

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>>739443508
feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel you
BIG time

Can I ask for advice with my current girlfriend? Need an ear to talk to

-SJ

>>739443695
Decent people are hard to come by
But if all else fails, youll always have us
The worst the world has to offer will always have your back
Stay safe, be strong anon, i hope to meet in another thread

>>739443655
I wish the best for you man. I love you anon you made my night

I dunno man..
I haven't dated a girl in over 3 years
I just feel alone. I'm not really that bad of a guy I guess. A bit weird but pretty alright in social situations. Make them laugh a bit with some lame jokes, that sort of thing.
It never really gets past that.

I almost dont even try to talk to girls that way anymore, just need someone to give me that fluttery feeling again.

>>739443773
Stay safe bro, be your own ocean

>>739443644
I understand. But I think what you need more than fake congratulations is accepting the fact that not everyone you meet will care about you. As you grow older birthdays seem more like a reminder of how much older you have gotten. It's trivial and dosen't matter in the long run. Find people who actually care about you and if you can't, atleast care about yourself. Happy birthday!

>>739443953
I love you too boi
I love you all, youve been here whever i needed you, and always close behind just in case i needed you again
All i can do is try and repay the brotherhood
Stay safe brother

>>739443995
Sorry and yea thank you.

>>739443973
Dont pick up rocks if you're looking for a diamond
Im in the same exact boat, havnt dated since highschool
Im very lonely, and i get sad often
But i cant bring myself to try if i dont have that flutter in my chest
For me i dont see a point, if it doesnt feel worth it then its not worth my time
But i hope it changes for you soon, i dont want you to be alone

Anyone got some chill instrumental music?

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>>739439853
Ftfy...

>>739444596
Look up yurima on youtube
Soulfull and sad
Piano is a cruel instrument
River flows in you - yurima
^^ always brings me to tears

>>739442943
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iyAaSo5Dewk

>>739444376
glad I'm not the only one out here like this.
I hope you do too.

It's difficult to find it but it's always worth the wait.
It'll happen again for us both at some point.

its worth the wait.

>>739444596
>>739444743
can confirm. you won't find a better recommendation than that

>>739444596
Try this
https://youtu.be/BVpgV9XjlOc

>>739443913
Everyone here has their ears open, continue, anon.

>>739439853
Well this girl I actually had a connection with and felt she was an exact copy of my personality and I had a falling-out a few hours ago that burned that bridge and we're most likely never going to talk again. Long story short I have known her for months and we have been talking for months but she got a boyfriend right around the time that we met which I didn't mind because I didn't have that sort of attraction to her anyway.

But it comes to be pretty obvious that her and I talk way more than her and her boyfriend do and pretty much after long emotional conversations with her over the course of the last two weeks she admitted she doesn't love her boyfriend and she wants to break up with him.

I end up falling in love with this girl and even when I wanted to help her I honestly didn't want to break them up but I didn't exactly want to keep them together either. I just knew how rough a breakup can be and I wanted to let the guy down easily I guess. Well he text him early this morning and tells me about it waiting for a reply from him so she can finally get it done and over with.

She then went completely silent for the next 90 minutes I guess until she came back and just out of nowhere started telling me she wants to try to rekindle their relationship[he was always distant and not very boyfriend like] and that she's pretty sure he loves her still. So naturally I flip out, I tell her she is a manipulative cunt and was only using me for emotional support until he came back from travelling

So yeah... This was one person I truly thought would never hurt me in any way. And then over the last week and a half or so she was getting all mushy and telling me she was falling in love, and we actually discussed getting together after she breaks up with him. So I'm sure you can see how I feel lied to and betrayed and used.

Fuck it life goes on

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>>739442801
Impossible, the earth is flat sir. No such thing as an "infinite universe".

#flxtearthmatters
#wokeasfucc

>>739444596
A personal favourite.
Embrace the darkness

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMivjfxiHnE

>>739444743
Good one, but im looking for something less sad and more just for chilling like this guy
>>739444859

If anyone wants a happy song to help them get out of the blues, here you go.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=294h3i0FpqY

>>739439853
you do realize this isn't real, right, OP?
fucking idiot

>>739444810
Thanks for the encouragement
I forget sometimes that things always change
I just get used to a state of saddness i forget theres other feelings to feel
Thanks again anon, it helps to hear

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m3lF2qEA2cw

I work and work because when I'm at work I"m needed and wanted there. But after work I'm all alone ESPECIALLY when I'm with my family because I know that they are going to leave me just like everybody I care about has. The only people around are my house hold and people I cant stand. Apparently I'm that person to the people I want around

>>739440985
God I love this pic

>>739445146
It's a wallpaper. Calm down

>>739445071
>>739445087
This will suit you.

>>739445146
Where did he say it was real?

>>739445248
What about it do you love? I'm interested

my dick isnt thick enough to make my girlfriend orgasm... 6.5 inch tho

I have these horrible highs and lows in my life. One day I want to be such a social butterfly and take my girlfriend on vacations around the world and do this and that. But some days I have these horrible thoughts that make me hate everything and prevents me from even answering phone calls from immediate family or even talking to my girlfriend at all. Those days I just feel like sleeping life out and nothing else. There's more to it but I'm too tired to type it.

I just needed to get that out there and vent a little.

>>739445087
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bM6huoB9zzM

>>739445146
Define "real", technically anything you can perceive can be quantified as real. I'm seeing a landscape of rendered space as an artist depicted it and it is very real but is it true to life? Perhaps not. Fuck off sperg.

>>739445087
Ah i see, sorry, i got nothing else other than dark souls/bloodborne ost off the top of my head

Y'know i've never seen a place on /b/ where people genuinely get along like this. I like these threads.

>>739445587
That's why I like creating them, my man

>>739445386
You sure about that? Has she openly told you that? Maybe you guys just need something to spice things up, maybe foreplay, toys? There's lots you can do to make her reach orgasm other than regular sex.

>>739445248
>>739445340
I am as well, what about it feels for you?
Personally i love this kind of pic because ive had some of my most intimate and meaningful experiences in my life alone. I feel more in my solidarity than during any other moment
Though my only real wish is to experience that kind of feeling and meaning with someone else who can feel as i feel
Its hopeless, but hope is all i really have

>>739441288
so ur one of those fuckbag douches huh. why do you feel the need to be an unlikeable nigger? i do see the appeal with women but is it worth it?

>>739439853
I feel buzzed. And that's okay.

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>>739439853
Trying to let a girl go. She wasn't that great to me and I wasn't to her either but it stings, haven't figured out how to deal yet.

>>739446145
Time heals everything friend
Give yourself time, you deserve a breather

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>>739446318
I'd agree if it hadn't already been three years since we broke it off.

>>739446525
No one ever said how much time it would take
Maybe its taken that long because you havent let yourself heal. You havnt given yourself the time
Im not sure, but i do hope it heals for you soon

Guess while im here I might as well post my "feels". So my friend recently broke up with his gf which i thought was great for her, because he generally never cared about her (she has some issues.). Well i kinda fucked up, i hooked up with her and shes now my gf, the problem is now with my friend. He broke up with her and is mad at me for getting together with her, they both knew that i had been crushing on her for some time. He's slowly starting to accept us being together, but it doesn't feel like he wants to be around us anymore, which sucks because he's a childhood friend. Any general advice would be nice.

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It's the the fear that I won't amount to anything more than anybody in my family has and I'll just be another model nothing special and I'll fade into obscurity

>>739443415
Well that's settled

>>739447013
Can we hear some more detail, if you don't mind?

>>739447069
Ayep. Guess I'll start paying attention to my gf again.

>>739445146
looks real yo

>>739440985
>>739441236
>>739441503
>>739441644
>>739441836
Saved.

>>739447317
Glad I could provide you such savable images :)

>>739447213
eh, maybe the fwb has a friend

>>739447136
I feel trapped in a cycle of wake-up, shower,work if I have too or clean, play games ,get yelled at for some little nitpick,go on the internet, go to sleep, repeat

Been in a ldr with this girl for almost a year, work schedules make it hard to see each other. Went to see her for the weekend and took her to a Metallica concert.

She's been quiet since, asked her why and she said she had a lot on her mind and didn't want to talk about it and just wanted to sleep.

We're gonna talk tomorrow and I'm absolutely terrified she's going to end it. I don't want to lose her, she's the most amazing girl I've ever met.

>>739447013
I have the same fear

>>739447568
I like your glass half full way of thinking.

>>739446735
Yeah I hope so too, doesn't help that her sister contacts me often. Should probably change my number and cut her off too.

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>>739447697
It hit me as soon as I fully related to the song "once in a lifetime" by talking heads. I started crying like a loser cause I dreamed of so much more

>>739447589
Well i would suggest trying to find your purpose. Take a week or so away from everything and everyone, hit the road and see where it takes you, find interesting people, do interesting things. The bottom line is that even if you think you're useless, you're really not, you just have to find the thing that will make you, you. I know that that's what helped me, i found the girl for me and I found my passion. Hopefully I have been useful anon.

I think I might be bi and I really want to try stuff with my friend but I'm worried he isn't into that as much as I am and and I don't want to weird him out and have him slowly avoid me

>>739444596
https://hanasumai.bandcamp.com/album/depressed-rock-guitar-in-d

>>739448266
Thanks anon I think sometime out would do me some real good to just think and try to understand myself

>>739448273
If he really is your friend, he'll accept that you might be and won't avoid you if he's not a true friend, well then he's just not. Even if he says no, its best to tell him instead of just keeping it inside.

>>739448528
Glad i could help :)

im terrified that im never going to meet someone who gets me, leading me to being alone for the rest of my life

>>739448613
I hope things go good for you and I wish you the best

>>739439853
just hoping that i get lucky enough to die, i want to be completely forgotten and erased from my meaningless life. i don't even have the willpower to kill myself.

>>739448638
Anon, the right person will eventually show up. It took a while for me to find that person and ik that it feels like you'll never find them, but give it time.

>>739448775
What makes you say that your life is meaningless?

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>>739439853
I dont believe in love anymore and i think im slowly turning into a sociopath, please help me

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Everything that ever has and ever will exist will one day be completely forgotten with time. You can't fight the inevitable. Even relationships make me sad. The knowledge that if some kind of relationship goes far enough into the future, one of us will die leaving the other hopeless and broken. We will most likely never see humans leave our solar system to go reach out into the stars. We sent out a radio signal to a star cluster that was thought to maybe house extraterrestrial life in 1974 with basic information about us. That message will take over 25,000 years to reach them. If they are still there and they can somehow decipher it, they will be hearing a distant "hello!" from a civilization and species that is long gone. I don't know. I just have all these thoughts about how small and insignificant we all are. I know everything is hopeless but I still have that drive that all of humanity carries. That drive to keep going in the face of uncertainty. The drive to keep going when there's nowhere else to go. Everything is so empty. Why can't I accept that?

>>739439853

Holy Crap!!!!!!!!!!

The shills attacking that Anon5 guy on /pol/ over the last month are connected to CP.

>>739442943
happy birthday /b/ro!

>>739448893
Why?

>>739443973
im in the exact same situation man holy shit it all just feels like a waste of time :/

>>739439853
I....managed to get a shit ton of vids of an ex gf by recovering a hard drive, and thought it would be this treasure trove, the sexiest hottest shit I'd ever had from a few years back.


The first bate was eh, the 2nd was double eh, and then I realized something...I didn't love her anymore.

My brain, hormones, dick, and everything had moved on, it had been too long, and I was just masturbating to dead memories.

Someone I really cared about is no longer in my life, and I'm okay with that, but somehow I thought the sexy memories would be well...permanent.

This is less feels and more I'm-an-enormous-faggot, but it did give me a lot of perspective.

Idk I guess im just horny

>>739449513
I know that exact feel

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>>739448893
sounds like you've got modern life in the 21st century figured out, i think you'll do fine, maybe even excel. hell, hate enough people, hate yourself enough, hate life itself enough, and you might even get on a magazine cover or a history book

>>739448874
if i tried to explain what was wrong or anything, half of the people would give me the same bullshit excuses of positivity that they always give me, and the other half would just write it off and tell me to kill myself.

>>739439853
I've reached the edge of everything that has ever been meaningful in my life. There are only two choices left to me: Make a change and start living again, or keep going as I have been this past year. All my friends have left me because I was working too much and was too boring. My family never has anything good to say to me. I pulled myself out of neet status, worked my ass off and just when I'm starting to pull myself out of a decade long period of depression and self loathing everyone calls it quits. I feel like they only kept me around because they thought I'd kill myself. Now what? I think my apartment needs a fish tank. That will be fun to do.

Yeah suck that black nigger dick bitch I want your husband to watch

>>739449764
Anon, not everyone one on here is like that, someone might say something that will give you a whole new perspective on things.

>>739449850
You might be in the wrong thread, friend

>>739449789
sounds good, Tyler Durden aka "the narrator"

>>739449981
I'm not sure what you mean by that.

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>>739449918
i've been lurking on these threads for too long to expect anything to come out of it, i'm not even one hundred percent sure why i posted to begin with. attention? probably, idk, i've jut been completely empty inside for years and i want to be forgotten completely.

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I catfish on pof all the time ..... met this chick on there from by me and we hit it off
3 weeks later and i am so wrapped up in my bull shit lie's I can't tell her the truth
we talk every day all day
so much in common..... she told me we are soul mates......... I don't know what to do

pic is her

>>739450324
damn anon why u catfish people

>>739449789
>fuck yea get yourself a fish tank

>>739450209
a change in perspective might help you . Cause that's when you see things in a fashion that helps change the way you think

I always get the feeling that something is wrong with me, like I'm sick or something. I've been in a slump and have been restless at night. I went to the doctors and they had my blood drawn and everything came back normal. But I've still been restless, so they prescribed me an anti-anxiety med and for the most part it's been working and I've been waking up at night less and less

>>739450392
It'd be worth it just to punch that jew Nev in the face when he showed up.

feeling really bad about the state I left my family in and pushing debts on to them, but it was definitely time to go.

>>739450324
that's your own fucking retarded ass's fault for catfishing people

>>739450324
Anon the only logical thing to do is to tell her the truth, if you keep going its only going to make you feel shittier and when you get caught its going to make her feel terrible. Better to tell her now man.

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>>739450324
>catfish
>on pof
Thats how I know you are lying

>>739450324
>hurr durr i catfish people
>feel sorry for me

literally kill yourself
your kind are the scum of the earth

>>739450392
I don't know fun ..don't know...... but i think this one will cost me some feels
she knows what I look like and she said all the right shit hansom cute her type.... we talk on the phone ...I am fucked ...

Today I took the the best Ness in the world to last stock in a friendly

I'm crap at that game so I'm still riding that high

>>739450758
yup, you are fucked. But really, what did you lie to her about? She knows how you actually look so that makes it easier.

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what does it feel like to have your love reciprocated?

>>739450613
she is a no BS type of chick I know what will happen when I tell her
I want to but fuck It will crush me and her ...

>>739450879
what actually in the fuck did you just say

>>739450879
good job anon i'm proud of you

>>739440910
I had what was described in the image, and it was what she wanted too. I guess she changed her mind after a while

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>>739451023
i play super smash bros melee competetively

ness is a shit character in that game, but I also play a shit character

So this was a cool milestone for me, because I have been trying pretty hard to get better

>>739451064
thank you anon

>>739450879
I've been trying not to cry at a lot of these posts but you just got to me.

>>739450957
I know anon I am FUCKED she wanted to meet up last Friday and I told her I had to work ..and she got upset and cried a bit before I made her laugh

>>739451233
She's gonna steal your organs bro. be careful.

>>739451192
oh i see
pretty cool man
congrats on that, i too enjoy competitive gaming

Im afraid to ever persue a relationship with a woman again. It didnt work out with my son's mom. Now that will never happen and I wont have the complete family I never had.

I dont want my son to have a step mom like I had.

This girl I know might be interested, but I am more wrought with anxiety than I have ever been in my life around women. I try to convince myself to forget about it. I like her though. But I need to just stop thinking about it.

I really dont think that it could or should happen again.

I'm a heroin addict and I can't stop looking at the scars on my arms. I'm trying to get better but I always seem to fall back. I know it's killing me but I can't seem to stop. I've been to rehab before and tried AA/NA and I just can't buy into all the 12 step bullshit. There has to be a way out of this mess. I've stopped taking care of myself and I feel like shit all the time. I've tried to ween myself off and I've been successful to a certain point. I went from shooting over a gram a day to maybe .3-.5 a day. Sometimes I just smoke it to stay away from the needle. But I'm afraid these scars are gonna stick around forever and I'm never going to get better. One of the reasons I use is because of constant anxiety that no anti depressant or benzo can seem to calm down and I can't even sleep at night. I'm at the absolute rock bottom right now.

>>739442233

My man, I've been there. Didn't spend a lot of time suicidal, mostly spent a lot of time not giving a shit about living.

My 18th was a big exception to that. I wanted to to die that day, and nobody fucking knew. I'm sure that you are pretty good at hiding that too.

The only exception was my Grandmother who figured out I was sad after 2 minutes on the phone. She was good at that, and it kinda meant the world to me that somebody knew. It's kept me going since then. Now I'm 25, rocking a "Meh" tier degree, decent job, and crappy apartment that I kinda love. Life is alright, it just took some time.

I why people commit suicide. It's a calculation that death, with or without the hope of an afterlife, is better than continuing to live. But you should know that your life will inevitably be different in a few years, and it's yours to change.

I regret that I never told my Grandma that she saved my life. I did promise to myself that I would try to help others in the same way.

So Anon, I see you being sad, and I hope stick around.

>>739451527
You'll stop when you run out of money. I was shooting a gram a day in Delaware, wear I was paying 40$ a bundle. Blew through my savings and quit cold turkey. Took a look around and reevaluated my life on an acid trip one night. Next morning I was on a train back to my home state. I've since bought some dope but only sniffed it. Doesn't help that ~110$ is the going rate of a G here.

>>739442943
Happy birthday bby

>>739451527
I was in the same spot not to long ago
you have to stop anon cut the dragon's head off
I just went to a very good friends funeral last week
because if the shit

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sometimes i like to pretend that i'm over her

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>>739439853
just the usual, thinking of what this all is. Whats its all about
why me, why us, why this type of existence.
what happened before me and whats happening after me. what ever this is we are all apart of it.

There's a girl I've been in love with for the past year. She's mixed and has curly hair and is the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. Most of the time I've known here I've been dating this girl who I've known for 6 years who turned out to be a total bitch. I've been in 3 relationships for those 6 years one for a year and a half with the first girl one for a year and a half with a second girl and again with the first girlfriend any other year and a half with barely a month of being single between those 3 relationships. I broke up with her just to be single before I go off to college so I can enjoy my life. The girl that I am in love with tho is my dream. And I can't get her out of my head and I've been trying to for the past year because I want to know what it's like to be single. But either way I can't live with my self without telling the girl that I love her. She's been gone at a summer school thing for 7 weeks and I haven't gotten to see her so I haven't told her. When she gets back I'm gonna spend a day with her and tell her how I feel. We've been good friends for a while now and my biggest fear is that she won't feel the same about me and I don't think she does. Anyways I'm gonna tell her cause I don't wanna be without knowing if she likes me or not. Gonna tell her next week any advice?

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>>739439853
Oh nothing, just the crushing realization that I'll never be happy and that I'm destined to die alone, unloved, and forgotten by those who knew me. Thinking about whether I should just follow my suicide plan and go die innawoods after exploring deep into the wilderness and seeing how long I can survive on my own. 30 next year and I've never even had a single relationship.

I've been wearing a fake smile for so long. I think it's about time I'm done with this.

>>739452255
>Rainbowroad.gif

>>739451880
Jesus 40 a bundle in Delaware. I'd be in heaven. Fuck that's cheap for a bun and knowing what I do about the area I'm sure the dope is fucking fire. I live in a place where it's more expensive as well. One of the reasons I cut down was unwillingly due to budget restraints. But I haven't suffered too much, as long as I get a few points in I'm good.
>>739451921
I'm sorry to hear that. Being a junkie sucks. You never know what's gonna happen tomorrow, you lose all your money and eventually your friends that are also using start to fall apart in front of you or die. It's so painful to watch.

>>739443439
Came back an hour later to see this.
Thanks. I don't have much other to say to it than that. But the last two lines you typed. I get it.

>>739452335
Be yourself

only way to know if she loves you for you

dont be afraid to soften just a tiny bit for her though, show a little of an affectionate side yknow

I hit 7 months on hrt today

>>739452679
ya it's only 40 here too some times 50 if your main hook up is mia ...lol
i hear that I have lost 6 people to it and I know of some who will be next if they don't calm down ...

>>739446760
Love yourself anon because I love you

>>739448638
I have the same fear but maybe it's not so bad being on your own

>>739452787
I ramble a lot so i apologize
Tldr i understand how you feel

>>739453183
I have been clean for over a year...but I did the same thing to a chick I was seeing never shot her up but I would tell her how good it was and on her own she found out how and off to the races she went

>>739452337
Maybe, instead of caring about anything else, try new things to make you happy anon, just be you and love yourself because in the end, it's gonna be about how you spent your life. In my opinion, the purpose of living is feeling. Feeling happiness, excitement and occasional sadness. You should never let sadness over come you. Life is about being happy. Fulfill the purpose anon. Never give up, you'll be happy you never did.

>>739453687
I didn't even tell him how good it was. I guess he just figured that there's a reason why I prefer to do it that way and tried it. He was already a heavy user though, smoking almost as much as he shoots now a day.
I just worry about future employers seeing the 2 small scars on each arm and not hiring me because of it. It's pretty obvious that it's from IV drug use.

im in a stage where my loneliness actually gets to me instead of just being another part of my life.

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I really love all of you anons

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>>739439853

>>739454000
I lucked out all my marks healed up after 6-7 months

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>>739454148

>>739454217
Someone posted this in another thread so I posted it here and I hope some of you might find this useful, even if it's just someone to vent to or whatever after the thread dies

>>739439853
Starting up a restaurant M/26 opening in a few weeks don't know what to expect

>>739439853
>What's on your mind anon?
I'm not good enough.

>>739452679
Yeah bro that shit was coming right out if Philly. Doing a honeybun a day takes the toll tho.

Favorite stamp had to have been Mike Tyson.
Perhaps red devil but there was different batches.

>>739454231
Hopefully my fresh ones will.

>>739454000
Put some foundation on it bro. That's what I did. And my marks are right in the crease of the elbow. Veins are huge so never had to tie or poke often.

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How do I trust people when my anxiety makes me think that I'm going to either get burned or drive an amazing girl away with my personality?

How do I stop being such a negative critical fuckhead?

How do I stop being so offensive and obscure with my humor?

How do I regain initiative to finish my school and get in shape?

How do I become me again?

>>739454525
I know it does. Then waiting for dope boy to come by the next day is agonizing. A half hour seems like a lifetime

What do you guys do about ennui?

>>739454591
as long as you did not get a bad ass infection they should

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>>739442943
mine was may 3rd this year, turned 17. same story :<

>>739454847
>/fit/

Figure out your expectations for yourself, and come to terms with the natural world.

>>739454766
My dope man sold me baby powder one day. Still the next day he was the only source I had. Gave him another 40. He gave me some flame. We never spoke of how he fucked me. Horrible drug.

Quit cold turkey. You'll be satisfied after 3 days.

>>739439853
I just keep lamenting about the life I'd have with invincibility and selective invisibility, and how I want heaven to be eternal godhood, whenever I'm not wasting time in games I hate or tv that's pointless or browsing that's pointless it's all fucking pointless gotta get to college already so I can do some drugs alone

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>>739455269
>You'll be satisfied after 3 days.
you my man are full of fucking shit summer fag

>>739450209
It's simple, you posted because you need and want help. You haven't killed yourself because you don't want to die, you just don't want to live like this anymore. The problem is that nobody will help you because they can't. The only thing that will help is medication but you have to get it on your own.

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>>739448893
>>739446145
>>739441683
>>739441709
>>739440910


Find something else to make you happy. Find a damn hobby. Travel. Learn a skill you've always been interested in. When you find happiness in something other than another person, you'll find yourself.
Don't depend on the risk of trusting another human being with your own existence. Love another when you know your life doesn't depend on it.

>>739448217
I've broke down to that song too. I thought I was an idiot for it.

>>739455507
No Nigger. I just was only going on 7 month habit. Not years like fellow anons. After 3 days for me I was fine.

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>>739440980

There should be a discord for this

This thread
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zSzluF9itcw

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>>739455612
Wow, that is some really good advice. How about you gtfo and take your spiritual bullshit with you, you fucking hippie.

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>>739455749
What you do two bag's a day 7 month will put you in the bag for 2-3 weeks I still call bs

>>739453841
I've tried to fight this sadness and loneliness for most of my life now. I'm tired.

>>739442233
record it

>>739456104
Hey, its better than loving a bitch and getting stabbed in the back 6 years later.

>>739455996
That sucks donkey cock

>>739456280
Get meds.

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>>739442801
Born too late to explore the world.
Born too soon to explore the stars
Born just in time to waste my life on /b/

>>739453841
I second this

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>>739445031
Thats women in general bruv...

If they aren't getting it from their main dude they'll use their orbiters to get the attention they want.

My Ex lead me on that whole bit for 9 months only to "realize she was still in love" with her ex....

Realistically all we ever are is a distraction from their current reality.... Even if you were minding your own business before hand...

They'll take you on a trip and kick you off before the ride is over if it keeps them entertained for a bit.

>>739456349
i thought it was pretty good, which is why i posted :)

>>739456372
They don't work, too many things wrong with me. Meds help one thing and make others worse. I have an entire childhood being stuffed full of pills to back that up with.

>>739456435
>am girl, can confirm

>>739447656
She's gonna end it... accept it and move on

>>739456510
In the same boat, mom was a pill-popping nurse and thought fuck tons of medicine would help. Pills just make me feel dead.

>>739456675
At least you had a reasonable response that might actually help most people. What I usually get from the people around me is them treating it like I can just magically turn off all these life fucking disorders at will.

>>739456559
Tits or GTFO

>>739456878
beat me to it

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>tfw too ugly to date attractive people, but too attractive to settle for ugly people
>tfw have a fun gf but not attracted to her physically
>tfw she buys me drugs but it still won't kill these feels

WAKE ME UP INSIDE

>>739456510
I mean antidepressants prescribed by a doctor who knows what they're doing.

>>739457028
>a doctor who knows what they're doing.

Protip no doctors know what they're doing

PEOPLE WHO WANNA FUCK ME ARE GAY BUT PEOPLE I WANNA FUCK ARE LESBIANS PLEASE END MY FUCKING SUFFERING

>>739457028
I've already been prescribed tons of those at one point or another by any one of several doctors I saw between the ages of 5 and 17. You can't just pill away all your problems, especially when you've got a lot of them. I honestly wish it were that simple.

>>739457226
You fucking know what I mean.

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>>739442943

>>739456506
try this anon
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFjqAtxW2s0

>>739456559
so what lezbo ?? saying she she she

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i fucking hate everything about myself
whats worse is i fucking hate how much i hate myself. Im gonna die a loser and failure all by myself

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>1st day freshman year hs
>have a few good friends but excited to make more
>have class with the coolest kid ever
>lets call him S
>found out he played all the games I played on steam
>stayed up all night playing dota - even school nights
>grades were shit but i was happy, S and I were best friends
>S says he has something big to tell me
>he says I wont want to be his friend anymore if I know
>finally get him to tell
>he comes out as gay

Now fellas im a straight guy myself but I really loved S in a brotherly way and ofc I didnt care he was gay he didnt like me sexually anyway

anyway
>a few days go by he's told a few of his other friends, all is well
>the next day
>S isnt at school
>we all joke that he probably pretended to be sick so he could play dota
>the next day
>get a call from the school S killed himself yesterday

nothing has been the same scince, its been 2 years now and not a day has gone by that i dont think about S, he didnt even leave a note.

no one knows why he did it, everyone cared when it was too late

>>739458162
RIP S. We won't forget him anon

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>>739445146

>>739456506
no no THIS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VEpMj-tqixs

>>739457008
I'm not sure if not having a gf is better honestly

>>739458271
Stay strong brother, don't let his choice ruin your life by negative thoughts and 'why' and 'what if's'.

Every person I've ever liked hasn't liked me back...

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We are all arrangements of atoms. At least one of them within us can make a choice. Isn't that fucking awesome? How is it possible that people can still find ways to belittle others? Because most are malinformed of the majesty of the universe they have yet to behold.

>>739459943
Dark matter and energy along with quantum entanglement give me enough proof that our conciousness has more power than we can physically 'see'.

>>739456847
That's sad bro. People who refuse to understand mental disorders are the worst to deal with.

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I have been with a lot of girls ..but
mfw ....I have never had that true love feel
like when a girl is in love with you and says it to you in that girly way

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Everyone here is crying about how they can't achieve the significant other they want. What you aren't realizing is that you are killing your own self slowly by holding on to these unrealistic ideals. I say this because I am currently just sitting on the corner of my bed with the supposed women I'm planning to marry one day. She's dead asleep and I'm not going to sleep because she chose to find something stupid to fight about and despite my efforts to be kind and lively she only sees me as important when it's in her convenience. Seriously and I say this with love to anyone who feels alone. There isn't a more lonely feeling than being stuck in a situationship where your whole life is conformed to another person's life and you literally have no reason to do what you do. I've thought about just killing myself being unable to find my escape. I'm not happy and thinking I made a good choice wasting my life on someone who won't give the same back to me is going to continue to ruin everything. I'm not sad. I'm desensitized and numb and I am ready for all the worst outcomes at this point. Ive lost my fear of death after being responsible for the death of other people. I know the meaning of life but I'm too far in to find it necessary to make the insignificant difference that won't matter in even 5 years. Fuck it, I'm going for it tonight. Never been able to word my feels but goddamn that's a relief and I feel some peace. In case any of you haven't heard it from anyone that genuinely means it anons, I love you and you will always be the best you let yourself be.

I've kep this post I made a long time ago

>be me
>be 20
>meet up with some old friends from high school
>there's this girl, let call her Cassidy, never really talked to her
>she's an easy 10/10, plays vidya, she's awesome
>we have a lot in common
>so much in common I can only list the things we don't have in common
>but I'm a 5/10, 6 at best
>we text for like three weeks after we all met at a party
>she gives me her Skype after the three weeks
>we stay up until like 4 in the morning for a week straight just talking and having a good time
>calls being like 13 hours long, talking about deep shit
>she tells me personal stories and I do the same
>borrowing my friends Nintendo Switch to play Zelda while I talked to her
>she was also playing Zelda at the same time
>thought she liked me back since she was always laughing and having fun talking with me

>>739461754

>she tells me about who she's always liked, she brings up two of my friends
>I shrug it off not thinking too much about it, I know my friends don't like her back
>we have the same sense of humor, play the same games, like the same food, we seem perfect for each other
>one of my friends notices us always online on Skype, he knows we've been talking since the party
>he thinks we'd be good for each other
>he asks her if she likes me without telling me
>the next day he shows me all the text messages
>she just says 'no'
>doesn't give a reason, doesn't say kinda or maybe, just 'no'
>why did I even talk to her for a month
>this obviously hurt me pretty badly
>I confront her the next day, she doesn't explain why and she thinks we should just stay friends, the cliché
>it's like I found the perfect girl and we had all that shit in common, and she just says no
>why

>>739461060
Why not just break up with her? Noone is forcing you to marry.

Free yourself and buy a new sportscar

>>739446760
you did a shitty thing. Fix it or deal with it.

>>739462066
I'm way too invested. Just bought a house to support her 4 year old, her, and our dog. My life will be in worse shit if I choose now to start over. To top that off I already started my journey for the night. Should be over soon

You have no idea how petty you h.s. age fucking fucking peasants sound whining/contemplating suicide over women. Here I am facing prison time, have no money, no place to live, no support, having health problems. I wish some stupid petty normie "boo hoo muh qt gf" bitch shit was the most of my problems. Fucking weak faggots get some coping skills or just stop talking about it and hurry up and fucking kill yourselves

>>739462838
On my way bitch. Sounds like you made some bad choices on your own.